hi all! tonight i've kinda just been vibing, listening to music, and thinking about things i wanna do with my art. doing that involves a lot of staring blankly at my FA page, revisiting old art, etc. so i saw my last journal and remembered: the Sanrio character ranking contest results are in!

to reiterate, i'm a huge Hello Kitty loser. i would've preferred she won out, but alas, in the end, she only got 5th... top five is still good enough for me because she beat My Melody. that means she beat at least one of the mega-popular Sanrio characters! i was still surprised to see Pochacco so high (3rd place), given how little merch i've actually seen of him. also a bit surprised that Pompompurin took first from Cinnamoroll, though i'm not totally sure why. and i must admit i did not do my civic duty of voting for Hello Kitty every day because i kept forgetting. that's an L on my part gang

now, the meat of the post! i wanna talk a little music! just cuz im feelin it~

given the 🔗 silly drawing of my sona Ocean from the other day, it's not hard to guess she's taking up a lot of my brain space right now. i've been researching a little more into her musical vibe inspirations, namely lighter furry takes on breakcore, speedcore, and all that breakbeat drum n bass goodness. i read up a little bit on PLUR and kandi in rave culture, which has me wanting to buy some beads and charms and make some ocean/orca themed kandi... not that i'll ever go to a rave and trade them lol. i'd love to get into the scene, but in reality i don't think i'll ever have the energy for that.

i also determined that the 🔗 Super Monkey Ball OST is sorta like... chill drum n bass? and i can't help but wonder if that planted in me some seeds of liking the genre lol. i did like EDM/dubstep remixes of video game music in middle school, so i'd say it's always been there in some form! haven't been into dubstep for a while, though. nowadays, when i'm in the mood for something more tangy than my usual (2000+ song) playlist, i definitely gravitate towards DnB and breakbeats. i love the idea of a song that starts out atmospheric and gentle, then introduces a clean, sharp breakbeat before bringing in more intense elements. or like, vaporwave with a breakbeat? that's gotta go hard.

considering those neon rave DnB vibes that are so core to my expression of Ocean, i was wondering about some art more directly in that vein but... well, i don't like spoiling any of my ideas :3 (especially cuz often i just never get to them LOL) but rest assured, i have some ideas for really different art forming in my head! hopefully i can fight the motivation issues and make something to be proud of <3

so instead, let me drop off some music recommendations! just what i've been listening to, tonight in particular. full album stuff.

firstly, 🔗 NO SUMMER NO CRY by Slime Girls. some upbeat video gamey synth pop tunes with city pop inspirations and a few toned down songs in there. i heard CCC (Gelato Beach Ver.) in middle school and only more recently found the full EP, and DANG i really love it! i vibe so fucking hard with the use of the mario 64 instrument samples, and the spoken part of YOU BELONG is a lovely addition

i discovered 🔗 Olympics in Space by nobonoko only tonight, but gosh, the 80s style electronic synth pop had me HOOKED! definitely something i'll be listening to while drawing in the future. the use of the metal pipe falling meme sound effect as a genuine part of some of the tracks (near seamlessly worked in, mind you!) had me awestruck, actually. good shit

then there's 🔗 Bicycle by Patricia Taxxon, with those lovely, always-experimental, techy tunes. (i don't know if it'd be "techno" cuz i don't really know what counts as techno, but to me, "techy" is the descriptor that comes to mind). i'm setting out to listen to more of her stuff, and perhaps work up to TECHDOG. i'm not very into noise though, so i may not be able to handle TECHDOG 5 & 6. still massively respect it as a piece of art tho. anyway in Bicycle, Big Wheel really stood out to me for the vocals and lyrics. anything dream-related can easily hook me. and Patricia Taxxon has such a talent for long songs that can maybe be a bit repetitive from second-to-second, but build up over time to something... transcendent! love it~

and lastly, 🔗 Stimulacrum by 4lung/Rawrdcore, with more experimental IDM beats. i listen to music on spotify (ew) while i'm at work, so that's most of my access to 4lung's music. and ive got some Laser Lemon and Selected Idiot Works on my normal playlist that i regularly vibe to, but i gotta admit... i've been sleeping on Stimulacrum! i popped it into my queue the other night since i was vibing to other 4lung stuff and wanted some more. was hooked on every song! the dolphin sounds in the intro hit me right in my orca heart <3 i feel like, overall, it's got maybe a "darker" vibe to it that feels more emotional, i suppose? not always great with describing this stuff. but i love that feel, makes it stand out from the other stuff i like

and a few honorable mentions while im sharing music! i will always return to 🔗 NERVE'S ENDING by The Quick Brown Fox. amazing speedcore sound and one of my first exposures to this umbrella of genres. and uhh, way in another ballpark, 🔗 a Mario 64 soundfont remake of Tatsuro Yamashita's For You by JQHN! my introduction to city pop! i've uh... yet to listen to the original whole album all the way through, lol. i just love what's possible with the mario 64 soundfont! ...and ahh this is getting long, but one more! Minewest Emo by saddyowner, an amazing reimagining of Minecraft Volume Alpha in a midwest emo style! i think it's a really beautiful rendition of an already beautiful and iconic soundtrack.

man, this was gonna be a short post when i started... and here we are x3 i guess i was really in the mood to share! i find it hard to listen to new music a lot of the time, so it's been nice to find some new stuff in some new genres. new for me, anyway. and learning lots along the way! so to anyone reading, i hope my thoughts and recommendations have piqued your interest enough to tempt you into listening~ hopefully some more Ocean art on the horizon from me~ have a good day or night <3

edit: oh and if you do listen to any of my recommendations, tell me what you think! would love to hear others thoughts~

yo whaddup. how are we all doing in these trying times of file read-only mode? it's a pretty interesting situation, especially with some artists being stuck on the front page xD honestly, i would probably hate being stuck on the front page like that. if it was a tao page or something i'd probably be okay with it, but if it was any of my weird NSFW art, i likely would not enjoy it escaping the bubble of "intended audience." i also wish the I.T. people working on this problem lots of luck and a bit of extra cash for working so hard!!

anyway this journal is quite brain-rotty, enjoy

i'm quite late to this, having only heard about it today, but the 🔗 Sanrio character ranking contest is going on right now! you can vote for multiple characters every day, and it's open until may 25th! as your local hello kitty bitch, i simply MUST encourage you to go vote for hello kitty!!!! and let's not forget her twin sister, mimmy! AND i must give some love for My Sweet Piano, because baa baa sheep like me (and very cute). kitty's got a lot of competition, and is falling behind pompompurin, cinnamoroll, AND kuromi in the initial results. (she's behind pochacco too, but tbh, i haven't seen much of pochacco? i work at the dreaded martwal, and i don't think i've ever seen pochacco merch. i wonder if he's more prevalent outside of the U.S., or if people just like cute puppy?) but i gotta root for my gal hello kitty!

i'm REALLY hello kitty brain-rotted. i've mostly bought plushies (i have a two foot tall golden one i fucking love her), but i've also bought a KILLER jacket (i gotta draw my sona in it still), a really soft blanket, and some other small things. i'm not much one for accessories, but i DO have a hello kitty scrunchie. hello kitty is that one thing that i spend too much money on.

while i'm totally into hello kitty... i really don't care much about ANY other sanrio character LMAO. cinnamoroll? fuck that guy. my melody? begone. kerropi? who's he? it's hello kitty ONLY (okay and my sweet piano). but in scrolling through the character options in the ranking, i've also realized... i haven't even ever seen most of these characters! and some of them are SO cute! my newly discovered favorites are Mewkledreamy, Gaopowerroo, and especially Usahana. usahana has the vibe of one of those plushies where each section of fabric is made from a different patterned fabric and she looks so cute; i've definitely gotta find a plush of her. also shoutouts to Hummingmint and Fukuchan (who is listed as "Kusuru no Fukutaro", which is apparently the drug store he's the mascot of? weird). and according to the hello kitty wiki, Adorozatorumary is described as an "experimental bipedal creative eigenmode." WHAT LMAO??? thats some SCP terminology bullshit. love it. and fucking... Ichigoman?? how did i not know hello kitty has a strawberry themed superhero alter ego??? it's just so BIZARRE. she's so topless.

there's also a lot of... just really weird ones in there. Seven Silly Dwarves caught me SO offguard. whaddya mean they just have ripoff versions of the dwarves from snow white?? then you've got the Strawberry King?? he's just got... a huge fuckass strawberry on his head? aight sure. Fresh Punch really stands out because it's not even really a character, just kind of like... a recurring object motif sanrio uses, so i think it's really funny it's on the list. then there's The Vaudeville Duo lmao?? just two random, plain-ass looking humans? what was sanrio cooking? i also love "WE ARE DINOSAURS!" but it doesn't even show all of the dinosaurs. had to look them up but they're pretty cute. the main orange one kinda looks like a lil shithead tho LMAO. the Sporting Bears are also really funny to me, but they're kinda cute too. the sanrio lore goes wild. honestly an RPG filled with sanrio characters where you play as hello kitty would go so HARD!!!

i have one last thing to add. i wish i had ONE negative vote to take away a vote for a character. while i COULD use that on some of the top tier characters to get hello kitty higher... i would much rather use it on fucking Dear Daniel. i HATE that little bitch. indescribable hatred for pretty much no reason. that man is NOT good enough to be hello kitty's boyfriend. hello kitty should be gay anyway, but that's me projecting so don't worry about it. dear daniel crash and burn challenge

anywayyyy yeaahhhhh the hello kitty brainrot is real. i just wanted to rant for a little bit about this because it's fun and because YOU should vote for hello kitty every day until the poll closes. pokemon go to the polls and vote hello kitty. it's really just immoral not to!

okay thank you for reading and have a good time <3

yo waddup. i got sick with strep (most likely) the past couple of days, so i’ve been sleeping a lot. allow me to recount the dream i woke up from this morning. (i probably won’t be doing a lot of dream journaling with these blog posts, but every once in a while could be fun).

i’m not sure where it started, but the first thing i remember is this short robot in some kind of auditorium building in a city. i think the robot kind of looked like Gir from Invader Zim. the robot’s creator (some old man) had ordered it to do some fancy shit in the building’s stairwell… that caused the city’s entire electric grid to go out. the police were immediately after the robot, but it escaped and managed to climb into an apartment building. it found my apartment, who i shared with some nondescript dream person. let’s call them Non. despite the power being out, our apartment has some colorful lights on inside.

Non and I immediately start discussing what to do about this robot. i look outside to find the whole city, and even beyond, completely dark. it turns out we’re in my fictional city Shoalport, living on the border of Waves and Highglow (🔗 here’s a map if you’re curious). from my window, i can see that all of Waves, Highglow, Hollowmire, and 8 Reigns are totally dark. The darkness extends towards the mainland, but eventually the lights do come back on in the far distance. across what is normally the ocean are distant landmasses which also have lights on them. (which makes me wonder about putting some of these landmasses in the setting).

so i guess non and i decide to protect the robot or something. the next day, we’re walking through the city without the robot, trying to avoid drawing attention to ourselves. i don’t know why, but we head over to this undeveloped, overgrown plot of land that i figure is on the edge of Leafcrown. it dips down towards these half sunken statues in the middle, which i come to realize are graves. there’s three little ones and one big one, and i believe non is somehow connected to who is buried here. i don’t remember any conversation, but i know non wants to be buried here. weird part of the dream.

we walk past the graves, over to a sheer cliff at the end of the plot of land. but there’s a small brick shack sitting there, which we figure out is an elevator. we hop in and i select the lowest floor. the elevator like, splits in two, and leaves non and i in separate halves, but they press the same button on their end. we come out into this dark, dilapidated hallway, and find a hole in the ground at the end.

this is where things get weird.

we drop down the hole and find ourselves in a dark house. this first room is small and mostly empty, but has a whole row of really little doors along the bottom of one of the walls. inspecting them, i find there are little gnomes standing behind them. like, garden gnomes. shiny, glossy, porcelain garden gnomes with silly hats and silly mustaches. we go deeper into the dark house and non picks up a flashlight. we find a note in the kitchen that tells us about the danger of these gnomes, probably how to deal with them, and a piece of advice — that they start by appearing in the garage.

and then it starts. non and i start to panic, knowing we’re about to be overrun by gnomes, and struggling to figure out what to do. we quickly find a second, smaller flashlight for me, and split up. i look for the garage, which i only find after two bedrooms and a closet (and maybe a bathroom). these rooms are full of colorful decorations that easily distract and potentially hide colorful gnomes. note that it doesn’t seem that intense, but i really felt the pressure.

i find no gnomes in the garage and return to the first room. the gnomes behind the little doors are slowly opening them at different speeds, and i start kicking them closed. i realize that’s going to be a constant threat we have to pay attention to.

i start going about the house and looking into little crevices with my flashlight. that’s when i find my first gnome. it’s sitting on a bedside table or a dresser and just… doing a little jig. kinda like how mario and luigi dance during battle in the M&L series. i shine my light on it and, after a moment, it freezes.

yes, it appears i’m playing the plushbaby minigame from FNAF: Help Wanted, but in a bigger environment and with fucking gnomes.

things blur together from there as we frantically run about the house, closing tiny doors and shining our flashlights on the gnomes. the way to tell if a gnome is a danger is if it’s doing a little jig lmfao. some gnomes freeze when shined on, but others retreat into dark corners or otherwise disappear altogether. EVERY gnome is unique in some way, with all sorts of different outfits, body types, hats, beards, and color schemes and such. but they do ALL have mustaches and silly hats. and as expected, they’re quite small! most of them probably hovering about one foot tall, if even.

finally, as things feel like they’re unraveling, and we’re about to get jumped by a gang of bloodthirsty gnomes, it unceremoniously ends with a big “congratulations” screen appearing in my vision and informing me that we survived 16 minutes. can you imagine 16 minutes in fnaf vr plushbaby hell??

things get blurry from there and like, a bunch of other random dream people appear and join the fun. it turns into a whole multiplayer thing and like we try to break the game and shit, idk. i woke up soon after.

i really felt the need to describe this dream because it’s so absurd. a fnaf-inspired gnome hide-and-seek survivathon?? what the hell?? and it’s worth noting that i have no clue what happens if the gnomes Get You. is it just a cheap jumpscare? do they attack you and you have a health bar? do they run off to conglomerate into one big gnome monster? or maybe they turn you into a gnome? IDFK!

but honestly… a game like that has a lot of potential LMAO. like, if it went full tilt on absurd, silly gnome nonsense, but attempted to take it seriously? thatd be hilarious. running around a house while you try to find gnomes would be awesome, especially as some multiplayer lethal company style game. like, where’s all the Gnome Horror at? or imagine something like garry’s mod prop hunt where everyone is assigned a random gnome and has to hide in a map among a bunch of other gnomes. and it’s dark and spooky and the seeker is some kind of monster.

such a premise would probably need a few tweaks to be fun though. cuz the plushbaby minigame is easily one of the worst in fnaf: help wanted lmao. but it’s just so absurd that i want it to be a thing!! maybe some kind of Gnome Radar to tell you which rooms have gnomes in them. i especially like the gnome doors that you have to constantly be aware of and care for, like fnaf 2’s music box.

anyway uhh yeah. that was my bizarre gnome dream LMAO. everhood 2 came out recently and i’ve been thinking a lot about it and the original, so i wonder if that’s where my brain got the gnome thing??

speaking of, i may also make a blog post about everhood 2 — some kind of review/rant maybe. but my brain might be over that already.

sooo have a good day and thank you for reading if you got this far <3

yo waddup. sooo i failed my new year’s resolution, which was to make one page of my comic (tao in the land of dreams) every two weeks. i was going strong for a bit, but the motivation slowly drained and i just didn’t have the discipline to make myself continue. it’s been pretty demoralizing. so at the moment i don’t have a lot of art interest, let alone in working on tao. i don’t know what this means for getting the comic done in the long run, but i’m not totally giving up or anything. i’ll get back to it eventually.

but what has been piquing my interest is starting some kind of blog. i get hyperfixated on stuff and want to share my interests, buuut i don’t usually make any art related to it. and when i do, its in the form of fanfics that never really go anywhere. so instead, i might just start blogging about whatever is currently on my mind!

here’s the thing: i don’t wanna make another account on tumblr or something. i hate the idea of having to make a billion accounts on a billion sites to farm interest or whatever. this account has been my main online home for a while — i like the gallery approach to sharing art and the ability to make folders and journals and such. there’s also a bit more customization on your front page than with most sites these days (which really says a lot about social media blandness). so! i figure, fuck it, i’m gonna make some blog posts here and use journal posts to do it! it’s not something i see anyone else doing — most people seem to use the journal for Big Updates and commission updates — but i don’t need to fit into what other people do. so i’m gonna make this site feel a little bit more like my online home and see how it goes! these blog style journal posts will probably be pretty infrequent, but that’s just how things are with me.

i think the ideal for me would be to make a neocities site and use furaffinity or even dropbox as a store for my art (you can only have so much space on a neocities site). figure out how to make some kind of blog system with folders for organization and all sorts of other stuff on the site. but learning HTML is like. a Whole Thing and not something i want to spend my time doing… yet. so, for me, furaffinity is the way to go! the only thing i don’t like is that it’ll put the latest journal on the front page in its full length. which takes up hella space. but oh well

i already have a blog post planned which i’ll be typing up after this <3 i hope you all enjoy getting a look into my madness!

yo whaddup, guess who FINALLY created a nice and proper profile for her page? it's been so bare bones and almost unchanged since i made my account. but now its all organized and i have pretty text separators and succinct information about what i do here! i also went and fixed some minor things in my folders (they're so organized and awesome go look at them). its making my page feel a little more like home <3 especially when i have such little presence on the internet but spend so much time on it. its nice! (id love to one day make a neocities site, but that's way far off!)

may further update it in the future, ive seen some pretty decorations on others' pages using account profile pics. also seen some accounts like that designed to be group badges to put on your page, but i wouldnt know any that are fitting for me. im also interested in making a proper banner for my page that actually fits my screen and isnt just a cropped version of 🔗 an older piece. (although i do like that piece as my banner, its fitting!) a new one is gonna take time, planning, and most importantly, a good idea first!

anyway yeah. YOU should go look at my new profile/bio because its pretty and um yeah :3 just thought id share~

hey all, happy new year! let's talk about my art in 2024, and my plans for 2025!

2024 went pretty alright for me, art-wise. a full page in the gallery and then some feels pretty nice for my usual pace, and i’ve worked on lots of ideas in the background. plus i finally have a fursona that i really feel like sticking to! (what that means for my other sona-characters, idk yet).

buuut, though the year has gone alright, my consistency continues to be a struggle. i only finished one Tumbleweeds chapter, made very little progress on Shoalport, and i only finished 10 pages of Tao in the Land of Dreams since the year began. compound that with many more wips and ideas that have yet to go anywhere.

so! in an effort to improve on that, here is my one (1) new year's resolution:

i want to focus more on Tao in the Land of Dreams. more concretely, i want to make at least one page every two weeks. of course, that's not a lot, but i've gotta start somewhere. (also art is my passion and hobby, not something i should feel burdened by.) i need to complete a page in every two week period; i don’t get to make multiple in one period and have them stack up.

and lastly, as for my nsfw art, i'll take it as it comes :P i do enjoy making nsfw art, and it's what most of you are here for, but my main passion has always been in my big story projects. i'll always have more ideas for silly/nasty nsfw stuff, it just depends on whether i feel up to the task of turning it into a finished piece.

next Tao page coming on or before the 16th, and every other thursday after that!

thank you for reading and have a great year <3

hello everyone! after however many weeks, i finally uploaded my writing backlog onto my AO3 account, which is why i haven't done any art in the past few days. it took a lot of rereading, rewriting, and editing to make sure everything was at postable quality. it'd mean a lot to me if you could read some of the stuff over there <3

the reason i'm writing this, though, is more because this changes my overall plans for how i balance writing and art. i got kinda burnt out on writing after Rails for several months, so i had been focused predominately on art. but now, with my pieces all up on AO3, i think i wanna try and put a little more focus onto my writing projects, and even intertwine my art and writing a bit. doing things like little thumbnails for certain pieces or little pictures in the middle of a writing piece, for example. so my art accounts may slow down a little bit in favor of my AO3 picking up pace -- maybe. there's really no guarantee with me, lmao.

anyway, thats all ive got to say. good morning and goodnight <3

i posted art for two days straight. god damn. anyway, now my entire backlog of art is on this site! thank you EVERYONE for the favorites, comments, and watches as i've been getting it all up, and sorry for flooding your notifications! things'll slow down around here now that it's all up, but i still plan on making art, of course. i hope to see you all stick around into the future!

bigger and better things, here i come!

and now i have to upload my AO3 backlog.....

so, i only just made this account, right? but i've been an artist for like 5 years now. so that means i have so many things i want to share with everyone!

thus, introducing [THE BACKLOG].

this is a massive collection of all of my worthwhile pieces from the past two years that i want to be accessible as a part of my history with art (the earlier 3 years... let's just say it took me that time to get into a place where my art still holds up). so i'll be spending the next however long it takes to upload all 189 pieces in my backlog, including both art and writing. anything made before 2021 will be labeled with [BACKLOG] along with its title and any other warnings. i've organized them all by date, and will be going from oldest to newest so that all the new pieces are at the top.

i'm doing this for two reasons:
a) i think it'll be nice to have all of my art posted in one place
b) i want people who come across my art to be able to see all of my progression, and to see how my old ideas have evolved

now... let's get into posting!
...dear void, what have i gotten myself into...