So my birthday is coming up on Tuesday. Plans for that day... Attempt to find job, retake a test, class.

But family and I will have birthday dinner another day, then next weekend will be down in Hot Springs watching some of the best magicians in the world at a big convention for them. http://www.weekendofwonder.com/ Jeff McBride will be there, who is one of my absolutely favorite magicians growing up.

And that's the plan of the week.

Okay, time for wrap up on MFM. I have to say this about the con... it was bloody awesome!

So Thursday I rolled out and hung out at Albi's place until he got off work and we took off for MFM, landing there about 5am so we both pretty went to bed fast. Friday came around and I moved to my room where I was with an awesome group of two mice and a deer.

Friday was pretty much like what a family reunion would feel like, seeing people that you haven't seen in a while. A few it's been last MFM and I was so happy to see them again. Caught opening ceremonies where TC hinted what the theme is next year and had me scheming already and pizza party went off which was amazing as always. That night consisted of craziness that ended with the Match Game where I was a contestant and won my round, then towards the end when a judge took off, I ran up to the spot to keep it rolling, and nearly lost our announcer through two of my responses (Sorry Tamara XP)

Saturday was I kind of chilled about the place, caught a couple panels but the big news was I got into the poker tournament, my first ever poker tournament, and won! So I have super sponsor next year when I go which is so awesome. And everyone there, it was a blast and I don't think it could have been any more fun. The rest of the night was revelries with going to room parties, chatting with the fursuiters and riding around in Turnbolts wagon. XD

Sunday rolled around and I generally wasn't in a hurry to anything. Watched the auction (yea... my wallet said "lol, nope" to just about everything) and actually dozed a couple times (Thanks Albi for being a pillow, I probably did need to catch up on sleep =P). Then all the sadness of the con closing down... but MFM is fun like that as dead-dog isn't as dead as with most cons. Ran to Osaka (I think the entire con did that night XD) with NARFA and a couple of the amazing vendors I was talking to, then came back where I got to meet a couple of the other furs I've seen but not known, got to have close conversations with others I have known and get ready for my goodbyes the next day.

And Monday rolled about and it was sadly time to go. Woke up late so had to throw things in the car fast and make a few goodbyes, sadly missed a lot for this part. But we did our trip to the Huddle House then the ride home was uneventful but rather nice to have someone to ride with.

Now, I want to do a shout out. You. You who was at the con. Yes you, that fur I hung out with during MFM. Freaking... Amazing. Every person there was an absolute joy, from the old friends to the new faces... this con is more close and intimate than most cons and that made it amazing. I so can't wait until next year when I can see you again.

Okay... I'm home from MFM. Had a blast. Will post the real post con wrap up tomorrow after my EMT test. Night!

And I"m about to take off to ride with  foxalbiazul to MFM. Last post until then. See you guys who are going to be there when I get there.

Stolen from  cosmik

Arrival and Departure:
Leaving out Thursday night and will figure out when we go from my other ride.

Staying at:
Whispering Woods

Mode of Transportation:
Carpooling with  foxalbiazul

Room Share:
Backwoods

Table Share:
Yes! I like meeting new people so will sit with anyone =^^=

Major Plans at the Con (so far):
um..... not really actually =P

Artwork / commissions:
Doodling on napkins!

Fursuit(s):
Alas, I do not own the fursuits. So likely no.

Attending Parties:
There are parties? Someone invite me!

How best to find me:
10 to 1, will be in steampunk gear. No, not that one... nor that one... oh crap. XD I guess look for the black with white striped collar.

Stage Performance:
Hahahaha.... Imma gonna hide now.

Drink:
My bloodlines are Irish, Norse, and German... you better believe it!

Smoke:
No, but will probably hang out with the smokers a lot. (Best place for a random conversation)

Hugs:
If you don't get hugged first!

Talk:
Yes please!

What is your gender?
Male

How old are you?
Will be my last con that I'm 26 (Birthday that month)

Can I touch you?
*poses* Worship me like a god! (no really, hugs.)

Can I buy you lots of drinks?
Hm... I don't kn- yes!

Can I give you lots of money?
I so need to see if Turnbolt needs a carnival barker again for charity fundraising

Can I hug or snuggle with you?
Omg yes please.

How tall are you?
In the 6' to 6'2" range, depending on which gas station I'm leaving

You look pissed off out of suit. Can I come up to you?
I don't know why I look pissed >_> I shouldn't be. Yes come up. If I am upset I'll still be polite but I don't see why I would be upset unless people are running away because I look pissed ^^;;

Are you nice?
I like to think so.

Are you cliquey?
Not that I know of. I

Can I stalk you?
No, just walk up and be friendly.

If I see you, how should I get your attention?
Yell "Azal!" also works is any comment about hybrids or "HEY! YOU!" and point at me.

Can I take a picture of ya?
Why? I don't have a fursuit =P

Can I steal ya away for *censored*?
Maaaaaaaaaybe

Kind of a double bonus for me. For those of you who know of it, I've been looking for someone to do a plush of my character based off a drawing, and it's been hard to find someone who makes plushes, and she has a competition for free ones.

So check out  Finnie and her competition here http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/4925623/ ! *crosses fingers for hope I win* =P

Yup! I dropped off the map again! I'm good at that!

Anywho, first a couple updates. Going to be starting at the local community college for EMT class. No word on jobs that will hire a student. Need to move out of this house before I beat my head against the desk enough to break it. (most likely the desk)

Now, as to the title of this entry. This is a bit of an odd ramble and a few know this story. For those that you that haven't heard this, this is a long rambling story that all comes together at the end, but it takes some explaining. So here we go.

Now at Anthrocon, I saw the artists table for  skulldog and discovered her work there, never saw them before but very beautiful work. Along with her artwork she had these cute plush skulldogs. First day I saw them and they were cute... by day three of seeing them spread among the con I was "Must get one!" I think it does have memetic powers because I was sitting at a table in the zoo after buying it and the others at the table and people went from "Huh, that's an odd cute thing" to "Must get one!" as well =P

Also in explanation. For years, nights have consisted of two things. Nightmares or black, haven't had a good dream in a very very long time.

So after Anthrocon, I'm back home, have the skulldog sitting up on my window sill next to my bed and the pattern as always continued. Then last weekend rolled around I discovered Reddit r/nomoresleep which was terrifying stories written as if they were true. I don't know WHY I read them but I did, finally went to bed, and the nightmares came. This nighmare I remember being chased by something. It was monstrous, only flesh and bone and claws and teeth but far stronger than should be. I remember getting trapped at the end of a hallway, it was coming straight at me where at this point a massive skulldogs head broke through a door frame, big enough to snag the monster in one bite and crushed it before vanishing. This skulldog was the same colors as the plush one, but not the cute style, but truely large, ferocious, and would be terrifying, but for some reason didn't feel any fear for it. That night my sleep was no longer plagued by nightmares and I woke up to seeing my skulldog where my flopping about in bed knocked the plush in my bed.

I laughed saying I wasn't sure whether this skulldog was a memetic monster that allows only itself to exist in my mind, a protective spirit, or just my mind grabbing hold of something random to protect itself. One way or another, I have taken to snuggling this skulldog each night I go to sleep because well, if it protected me in dreams once I felt it should. Which later this week something interesting happened. Had a dream, not a nightmare, but a legitimate not terrifying dream.

So take this story for what you will, I'm glad I have this little skulldog here each and every night.

I haven't been able to sleep normally for the past few... weeks now? Heh, tonight is worse, because guess who discovered a nice creepy story archive?

Go me for making a stupid decision there... I'm good at that it seems.

Hey artists. I had a brainstorm of thinking on making some custom art books. I need your help knowing what kinds of paper do you guys like best, how you like them bound best, etc.

I don't know how long this will take for me to get started on but I need to start thinking on it.

If you know any artists, pass them along to this journal, I need as many opinions as possible.

The Rabbit Hole is a live internet radio show that comes on weekly, run by a furry in Florida Romeo Rabbit, he plays music live by request from furs on the IRC channel. Even when that's not happening, he has a regular radio station on Live 365 which plays music that tends to be popular with furs, music from old cartoons, and even music by furs like Bucktown Tiger and Rhubarb the Bear. On the Sunday lineup of the shows played by furs, The Rabbit Hole is my favorite one that I look forward to.

This said, the computer that runs The Rabbit Hole Live has gone offline, and until it can be brought back up and running, the service that was provided by one of us will be gone. I know it's hard to scrounge up money (boy I know I do) but I can eat at home one more day to send a couple bucks his way to get things running. And even if you can't spare a nickel, a signal boost can possibly help to get the word out.

Thank you.

This is the journal that originally informed me that the Rabbit Hole is down. https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/4835712/

So I finally got home yesterday from Anthrocon. Spent a couple of days after crashing with  foxalbiazul which was quite nice. I think I slept better those couple of nights than I have in months.

Let me tell you, the drive there was quite looooooooong, but I think I find myself liking that part of the country. I get to the Appalachian mountains and I'm so squee happy seeing them. And I was told the view to Pittsburgh was incredible coming in, and yes, very much so.

This con was kind of relaxocon for me. I didn't want to go running from panel to panel to catch. Mainly stuck to the main room shows I wanted to see; Bucktown, Fox Amoore and Rhubarb Bear, Sardyoun, 2 Gryphon and Uncle Kage. Also lived in the dealers den it seems XD

I have gotten to see so many people, made new friends.  onai set the mood for the whole con when I'm standing in a strange city at a strange con and I hear "STRIPEY" yelled at a crosswalk! XD If it weren't for you I'd likely have not gotten a Pittsburgh tshirt either so thanks for the heads up.
Caladon: So much thanks for the last second room. Definitely couldn't have made it otherwise.
Damiana and family: Thanks so much for adopting me in to your group. Saturday night was an absolute blast (though hopefully next time we won't have security knocking on our door... though then we won't get spoons)
 cosmik  rhubarbthebear Was so VERY glad to see both of you at this con! And Sunday night you guys were absolutely AMAZING getting a crowd like that. I hope to see that again.
And so so so so many more of you guys that were amazing that if I keep typing it will be next AC by the time I finish XD.

It was an absolute memorable Anthrocon, especially for a first year experience. Many new people to hug, a whole new city I need to go back and see (OMG Pittsburgh is so beautiful), some new goals to work towards, and even had my first crush on a fursuiter (what? Stop looking at me like that.) and met one of my favorite comic artists and the first artist who got me into the furry fandom. All and all, very good con.

Until next year... guys... you people are amazing.

And now that I've written this... I should try to sleep... though that's seeming hard now without someone to snuggle.

Stolen from  foxalbiazul while he is at work.

Where are you staying?
At the Omni.

What day are you getting there?
Late Wednesday.

Who will you be with?
I dunno. Who can I follow? =P

What is your gender?
I am a male.

Are you taken?
That would be a big negative.

How old are you?
26 years old.

Can I talk to you?
Please do! =^^=

Are you cliquey?
I like clicky pens <_<

Can I touch you?
I like hugs! Anything more... rather would know you.

Can I hang out with you?
Sure

Can I buy you drinks?
YES!!!!

You like shinies?
I have ADOS (Attention Deficit- ooooooooooooooohhhh Shiny!)

Can I hug or snuggle with you?
I like hugs!

How tall are you?
6'0"

Are you nice?
I hope so...

Can I stalk you?
Would rather you talk to me directly >_>

How long are you going?
Wednesday-Monday

Do you have an artist table?
I am a fail artist

Do you like parties?
Would like to go to some

If I see you, how should I get your attention?
Wave, say hi, call my name. The usual sort of thing.

Where will you be most of the time during the day/s?
I dunno... AC virgin

What/where will you be eating?
Figuring out where to eat.

What's your goal(s) for the con this year?
Meet people! Um... learn about the con. Dunno, this is my first AC.

Mainly wanted to fill this out while sitting at the Foxes house, wrapped up in a blanket because the AC is really cold XD. I'm actually kind of enjoying this... it's been a while since I've been able to wear my collar.

Hokay... I know I've not been about much, might give a bit of an update.

Apparently I'm going to Anthrocon, managed to find a room at the last minute and will be riding down with  foxalbiazul who was the one that kind of poked me to going. Will be heading down Tuesday and heading back home Monday. If you want to meet up, let me know, I will be glad to get in contact.

Also... about after I got my room... my motorcycle decided to die on me. Bearing broke in the drive and it chewed up the gears for the rear end... so will be having to look at getting a part. This... might be a bit difficult.

Still living with family, still looking for work, but looking at this semester going to school to get my EMT.

Whelp... that's all I can think of at the moment.

Exactly what it says on the tin ><

Well fuck. So this is the first time I've been to a computer in a while, and the main reason is I'm back home.

After last post, I had a worked, been back and forward over the country. Actually was moved to a second trainers truck after about 3 weeks. First trainers truck broke down and well, both of us were high strung individuals, it wasn't working out. So moved to second trainers truck, real awesome guy.

But the thing about it is... backing, learned it. Shifting, was getting good. Load securement, the hard part for flatbedding I actually enjoyed and was doing great on. But I got into city traffic I tensed up so much trainer was worried I'd be more likely to make mistakes because of how jittery I was (I could tell, my shifting went to crap in bad traffic.)

So I'm jobless now. Trainer and training lead both wanted to keep me on, but this whole city thing no one could figure out how to make me calm down and after 5 weeks of training, they had to let me go. And it was a nice type, they suggested I take a couple months to decompress, try another company, I can always go back to Melton in a year, I'm leaving on very good terms.

Just humiliated, frustrated, tired and worn out... I wouldn't be so bloody mad at myself if I hadn't proven I could do -all- of it, but just couldn't put it together in a city.

So ya... don't mind me while I go hide for a while.

So I'm sitting in a truck in Wisconsin. Going to be sharing this truck with a trainer for a month. I am really starting to doubt myself now. I'm driving a vehicle that is 80000 lbs, back in a vehicle amongst others that acts different than even other semis, and secure all cargo each stop myself. I'm lonely and scared, not sure how to hold it together while hiding myself from my trainer… just can't be myself. I don't know if I can do this.

So I have a job with a truck line. I am starting orientation on Monday then will be on the road for 3 weeks with a trainer before I get my own truck.

Am I nervous? Hell Yes. Going to have to spend 3 weeks with a stranger with little privacy, then afterwards moving to a more lonely career than the last I was in with a massive vehicle I will be completely in charge of. Yup, nervous I think is understating it just a little bit.

But I will be traveling nationwide, so those of you who want to know where I am, I am on here and on twitter under Azal_R75, watch for me, I really want to meet you guys when I stop.

Also, any furs in NWA who want to meet up tomorrow or Saturday night for a hang out somewhere, I would be happy for such!

So I'm moved into home base of operations, also known as my parents house.

Having to use parents main computer, that will be a constant fight between my dad and I, so I am markedly going to be a lot more missing on things that can't be done using my phone. Going to spend the week "moving in" and getting things finalized, but I'm REALLY ready to get on the road and get back out of here, hopefully it shouldn't take too much longer >_<

That is all for now.

Hokay. yea guys, I vanished for a while. I got home after test and played Skyrim until I passed out. Then yesterday was dedicated to going to get my hard copy of my CDL and then I played Skyrim until I passed out. So today... no Skyrim =P

Seriously, I have a lot coming up, I have to be moved out of my apartment by the end of the week so I have to start packing up and getting things in order, also triple time throwing in applications and getting into a job, which will be fun because my parents are just going to -LOVE- having me move in a bunch of boxes, then leave =P

But that's the current plan of things, moving back in with parents now. Getting out of Little Rock because... why do I need to pay rent when I'm not actually going to be -home- for a long time. Parents are willing to let me use their house as a storage location (mistake =P).

I hope I can keep updating on here pretty consistently and not do one of my disappearing acts, but hey, be patient, if I do vanish, I'll be back soon.

And seriously, guys... all the well wishers on my test and congratulations on making it... all of you who stood behind me and supported me when I was freaking the heck out.... I love you guys.

I know many of you will get this and go "We know" with the text spam I did, but I have my CDL now! Passed the test first try!

Now to move my stuff back to my parents and figure out which company I want on and start a working.

Also Hallelujah!

Exactly what it says on the top. At 4am.... and all I have to say is FML. Seriously, not ready for this.

Okay, so I'm starting from square one.

Yea... screw that. I'm the continuation of  Azal.r75 I had gained this name and wanted to make the move to make this my main page. Most of you coming here probably know me from this.

So, TFF2013 was freaking amazing, I would honestly say that weekend was the best weekend of my life... and when it comes to cons, not just furry conventions, but in general it was the best con I've been to. I will definitely do everything I can to get there again in 2014, and I will do my best to make sure I keep in contact with all the wonderful furs I met at the con.

The week after...well con crud certainly attacked me to a level that took me down, but the good news also came that week that yes, my CDL class is getting paid for, so I'm getting through by state to be a fully trained truck driver =^^=.

News on it... HOLY FRIGGIN HECK this stuff is hard. I got thrown headfirst in when I got to class... turned out that the state computers were going to be down Wed-Fri, so when we would normally be getting our learners permits on Friday, instead we had to do class and get them Tuesday.

Honestly, I'm still trying to get the idea that they are seriously giving me control of an 80,000 lb death machine here... I've already driven once and shit... trying to keep up with shifting it and turning with a 48' trailer.... dear lord I'm not sure I'm ready for this.

Well, now moving stuff over.

-Azal