Hey there, everyone. I want to let you guys know I'm not dead. I want my friendly neighborhood panda girl to know that, I have hired someone to do a reference sheet for me. I want my friendly neighborhood red dragon to know I'm sorry if he got anything unwarranted from my failure to keep the best track of my emails. I'd like to thank my new watcher for the reference sheet. I would like to let my mate/friend/I'm not sure where we are now, to know I love you and we'll always be friends even if we are truly parting ways. I'm sleepy guys and I'm an insomniac. If you're reading this I'm still working on my own art of my character it's only temporarily been delayed as I've had to start from scratch again. Everyone be safe, live well, and rest peacefully.

Hello again everyone No anger, no rage, no fury, I have none of these feelings today. It's mother's day and another year after my own mothers death. You know I've never really shared that with anyone here. I could only really feel sad today, and yet I went out to a movie had a wonderful dinner, still at the end of the day I can't help but feel sad. It's not the day I lost her, but today more than others just makes me miss her a lot. She was someone special to a lot of people in her own life. She and I didn't see eye to eye on a lot of things, and it's not like I never got to say sorry for them or I didn't get to say that I loved her enough. It's just it felt like it wasn't her time and doctors didn't care. I don't know but playing a blame game doesn't feel right either. I'm doing my best to try to honor her memory but I don't think I've been doing the best I could at that as of late. I know a few things I can do to pick up honoring her it's unfortunately not going to start here. End of June is new deadline for my Fursona. I haven't worked on it in a while still coming along slowly I like where it's going but still slowly. If you read this thanks for letting me put my mind at ease a little, and I hope you had a good mothers day that was enjoyable and that your enjoyed your time together. If you didn't read anything here other than updates, what ever hope you're happy.

I'm struggling with a lot right now. My last month was a bust for job finding. I've got a lot of monotony going on in my life right now. I can't help but feel like Belle a bit right now. Very odd and out of place in this provincial town. Then again if I was in a provincial town i might actually be able to be hired on just being alive. It feels like I'm starting to struggle with depression again part of me just wants to just reach out and scream. I either need a change of scenery for a few years or a trip to try to go and see my dear heart. I want everyone here to know that I've been terrible with my recent set of deadlines for my self on here and it's been tough to get around to doing anything at all. It feels like there just isn't enough time. This moment right now I'm about to start working on my fursona again and not let anything interrupt me other than sleep or food every last distraction will be gone from my mind come the morning shine. I've been holding back on you a little bit as well. I should tell you that I've had a split purpose for a while now. I've got fans of my writing on another site and right now I'm not ready for these two worlds to collide just yet. So part of my delay on my artwork has been me working on writing stories and now you know. To my love if I can still call you that. I keep missing you every day I hope things are alright for you and I want you to know that I still love you with all my heart and I want to try to see you sometime. I... I know that just seems so impossible my dear, but I just once want to show you I care face to face in our own little paradise for as long as it can last. Love you. To my other two watchers, friends, and all around decent people to me. I want you to have the best days to follow year and that everything you do is met with success. Thank you for always being my support while I need it.

Finishing my Fursona picture has fallen behind schedule as a result of increased job search priorities. Sorry to let my friends down again but both are important and I need to get both done. It's coming along in-fact I've got a good feeling about the shading on a certain part that I wasn't sure I would get to turn out right but I think I've come up with a perfect solution. So I'm going to ask you to kindly please wait a little bit longer on this. I'm aiming for the end of the month now. Thank you again to friends and family for their support. To my My Sweet and Sexy Love I miss you always and I try to be on yahoo everyday on the off chance I might see you on again. I love you always and I hope school is going well for you send me a pm on here sometime You're always in my mind and on my heart. To my favorite Panda Nice job on your recent images and your commission page. Look forward to seeing lots more from you. Lastly to Big Red. I hope things are going well with you and I hope we can find some time to spend some time together too. As one of my favorite artist's is apt to saying TTFN.

Hey there my small band of friends and my dear heart. I want you to know I now have a deadline for my fursona. It will be posted no later than march 16th. In the mean time on Monday I will upload two photos of an astounding gift I revived from a close friend which is supposed to be my fursona. It didn't come out exactly how I explained it but I'm very happy with the results and I want to share them with everyone. I will also offer images of my X-mas project that kept me so deterred. over the month of December. Other than that I wish my small by fathful folowers Happy wishes and safe days of their lives. To my love Know that you're always in my mind and heard while we're apart. I miss you all the time. To my friendly neighborhood panda Grats on the new tattoo and I hope things are going well with you. To my big red dragon friend. Thank you for the support and comfort during a particular down time for me.

No other word for it my friends. Not a single one of my sketches really felt inspired. I couldn't get behind any of them. Not a single one I could finish and call decent enough for a challenge of hundreds if not thousands of artists. Not a one of the Idea's connected properly. All of them a mess of jumbled angles and failed perspectives thank you for the support at trying to get this done. Like in baseball I'd swing but not connect to the ball. It needed to be moving and simple everything was complex and over thought. I"m not too discouraged my friends, but i should be doing better then that. What's that British phrase " Keep Calm, and Solider on." So I know this post is out of my normal update schedule but I felt it needed to be said. I"m getting back to working on my Fursona picture. It is currently my number one priority as far as art goes though I will have a belated gift for that dear sweet bunny of mine I'll only post it with her permission though. Other than that I hope everyone has a safe time as I make another trip between states again. I love you my dear sweet heart. To my other two watchers I hope I haven't let you two down with this information. I feel bad enough about it as it is for not being able to come up with something spectacular. Maybe I didn't grasp what i needed to the best of my abilities. Oh well. once again be safe and take care my friends.

Ok so I've said that as far as my art is going that I'm working towards a fully featured fursona pic. Unfortunately this project will be delayed because I am interested in an art contest. So over the next few weeks I'll be sketching and working towards competing in the League of Legends Presason Three Digi art Throwdown contest. I won't be posting my entry on here until it's over so as to protect it and make sure no one steals my Idea. With that being said. I'd like to wish my friends success in all their endeavors. I'd like to tell my mate that I Love her as always with steady simple devotion because I care about her. Lastly to the panda who's been very patient with waiting for this I promise the art contest won't slow it down too much. It's been too long since I've said anything and I want my mate wherever you are to know my thoughts and heart is with you. Also semi exciting news I might start offering some commission slots sometime in March. That is all.

First off let me say that to anyone who bothered to read my last post that I'm sorry about slipping into a political rant but unless my temper flares at the media again it won't be happening again any time soon. Onto more important issues. Now that I no longer have the burden of getting things ready for the holiday's on my mind. I can focus and spend a lot of time hammering out my Fursona pic. Which will be my first adult image to be posted. I say this based on how it's drawn and that making this stallion PC just for the sake of letting friends and family not a part of this site able to view it. Feels like a waste of my artistic potential. So with that i hope everyone had a good New Years and look forward to the weekly journal update thing on Monday's again from now on.

Well if you did like me and so many others. I just came online to say something today. I'm almost done with holiday setup as such I wanted to talk about my plans for my personal fursona pic. My friendly neighborhood Panda says I need a complete reference info pic. I find this proposition boring with out aid as running off character stats is a little time consuming, and then I'd also have to have like three view points. So any suggestions to making this process easier are very welcome. Now in the wake of the nonpocalypse I feel like raging against the steady grind of the day to day routine. I'm sure unless you're a fur who actually lives in a cave and FA is your only source of news. You have heard about the school shooting Connecticut. Now that being said it's a terrible tragedy. You're not going to hear me calling out to god asking he/she/it why did this happen. What you are going to hear is my opinions and since they are like an ass and everyone has them you're free to say what you want but this what I'm saying.
1. Yes everyone in america is allowed to own a gun. Yet as a citizen of this great country which has a wonderful democratic process. I don't understand why I should be forced to learn to hold and fire a weapon. When what we as a nation should be striving for is world where children shouldn't have to hold weapons. It's a failure on our government, it's a failure on the NRA, it's a failure on parents that shootings happen. I'm not a parent yet and I would love to be one with my mate, but I would never choose to own a gun. Not for personal protection, not for hunting, not for all the money in the world. Because when you let a fire arm into your home you're undertaking a responsibility for that weapon. If you don't understand the weight of taking someone else's life you shouldn't even think about owning one. You are taking other people's lives into your hands every time you pick it up, or take aim, pull the trigger. Are your families lives worth having that weapon in your home? Are your communities lives worth it? The NRA took time today to tell everyone that what we need is more guns. No shocker there my fellow furs. It's the irresponsibility of the government, the NRA, and parents. That leads to shootings like this. We have the ability to stop things like this from happening. When we can't take responsibility for things that we do that cause much bigger problems. That's when we can't stop it. God gave us the power to solve any problem we made ourselves. If we can't stop it ourselves aren't we letting God down not the other way around. Background checks and an assault weapons ban won't stop shootings from happening but they make it a lot harder for them to happen they would make a huge dent in shootings. The last thing I want is a society where bullets coming out every house every day is a normal thing.
2. R John Boehner you are nothing but a coward. A yellow bellied, sapsucker of a long tailed cat, in a room full of rocking chairs. You don't want what's best for the country even when the whole country is telling you to agree to the president's deal you say it's not serious and dismiss it with out looking. You and Eric Cantor have basically gone home for Christmas. You Mr. Boehner have the best options on the table, and you can't make up your own mind much like a former presidential candidate Mitt Romney. All you and your party have done since the re-election of the president is continue to disrespect him and the country who put him in charge. If you or any republican's were true Patriots you would do what's best for the people. Not engage in some form of political masturbation which isn't working. The people didn't elect you or any of your people in the house to do this again. I hope you understand the consequences of your inaction. But it's likely you don't since you're not still on the hill trying to work something out. In the unlikely event you even read this, I want you to know that you might be the first one off that cliff but if we go over it you're the one who is getting tossed over it after everyone's back on stable ground. You've painted your self into a corner and the nation doesn't like it. I have no remorse for you or your actions.

I'm going to spend a wonderful holiday with my family and friends. We're going to be effected by this. I have faith that he president will do something to make sure everything comes out ok for those of us not in the top bracket. No more politics my friends. I had to get that out today. I wish my friends and family a Merry Christmas. Those of you I don't know but who read this wishing for a positive Holiday experience. I also wish Merry Christmas. To those who want a negative holiday experience. I once again say Bah Hum Koop to you. Lastly to my mate baby all I want for Christmas is you.

I will be leaving my temporary residence in AZ to head back to my Hometown in CO for Christmas. Not a Happy Holiday. Christmas is the reason I'm going back. In addition to most of my friends and family being there. I respect and understand there are other holiday's happening this time of year, but rather than give you a generic greeting that might as well be disrespecting your Holiday more I think it shows greater respect for me to tell you Merry Christmas and have you respond with your Holiday's greeting. I'm not assuming you celebrate Christmas I'm giving you a short snippet of my personal faith. If you don't like that respond with "Shut up fool." or " Bah hum Koop." Otherwise I want a response of your generic Holiday greeting. That shows you respect my Holiday decisions and have your own holiday decisions. Now to all those who want to have a positive holiday experience I personally wish you Merry Christmas and a safe holiday experience. To all those who want to have a negative holiday experience You can have a Bah Hum Koop of a Christmas. With a lump of coal to go with your triple-decker toadstool and sauerkraut sandwich with arsenic sauce. Till next year on this journal crud.

But it was only One thing. The holiday's are already starting to bog down my artistic workloads. So I have to put my Fursona Pic on hold for now. I will try to post more of the non art pro pokemon pics. But only slight uploads wiill be all I have I time for if I want everything in order on time. This means that any upload other than one of these pics won't be happening until January and Since I said I'd be slowing down posting here over the holidays I fire saying this now would be good. I give my love and a deep passionate kiss to my mate, Support to my Panda, and another big hug to my big red dragon. You all are the best friends a Zebra could ask for.

Alright well fellow followers I'm very sorry about another week with no updates. I can say my Fursona is progressing more than I could last week. Yet I feel this is weak solace considering what I've promised would be up this last week As a show of good faith I will update something before I go to bed after this post. It's late everyone I've found my self in a big batch of insomnia so please forgive my non updates I've been working on more than just artistic pursuits. The dreaded holiday rush is coming along with the supposed Apocalypse which I say has already failed at coming to pass with Obama being re elected. So my entire resource pool is about to be diverted to gifts and bags and giving close family members personal gifts. To my mate I'm going to try to have something for you just for this Christmas. To my panda your gifts have already been purchased at $0.00 and you can't prove other wise. To my big red dragon a high five and a hug to stay warm this winter. I know the winter isn't good for you cold blooded types. I shall try to keep everyone updated but I want this to be one of my last sure Journals of 2012.

A very slow week this week my friends and family. Nothing much happening at all. I didn't even work on my Fursona pic this week at all. Or do any of the uploads I had planned on. I make it my personal vow that I'll do more to get these done this week. To those aware that there is a presidential election decision this week. I would care to say I hope that we have another four years of a smart president as opposed to the moron with a R next to his name. In case that was too over your head Republican's I was calling your candidate a moron. I tend to be very firm on my allegiances in this and a majority of the smart people in this country should agree with me. Those that listen to reason anyways well before I get off on too much of a political rant Work on that Fursona pic and Upload the Non art pro of the pokemon pics are my bullet points for this week. Well Rest well everyone be safe. Love you always my mate.

This week fellow watchers I"m going to be putting up the non art protected versions of my Pokemon Arts. I'm sure i'll find some time to work on my personal Fursona Pic. In addition to writing lengthy hopefully awe-inspiring words to go along with them. I"ll also likely upload that sketch I mentioned some time in there. Thank you once again to all my watchers and I'm really lucky to know all of you and once again I love my mate very much. "Thank you Fur Affinity, Good Night!"

Hello everyone I was just in the middle of a very wonderful dream when I was awoken by something strange and unfamiliar it was Sunlight and it was early morning. It's usually dark when I'm up early in the morning. Not today apparently. So Those of you who've watched me have seen my latest installment I'm very pleased to say that my mate was very happy with it. I'm not sure how much work I'll get done on my fursona pic this week. I should get it closer to done in Nov. Thanks again to all those watching now I must return to my coffin before I turn to stone. Curse you sunlight! Have a good week and be safe.

Next Update will be on time friends and those who view this post. Yesterday was a lot of me adjusting to a three hour jet lag. Feeling a bit under the weather after my return from the big apple. Other than getting a lot of free stuff and seeing a lot of cool people at the con, my biggest high point for me personally was getting to see the Balto statue in Central Park. Due to unforeseen monetary complications I couldn't get souvenirs for everyone I wanted to. I did manage to get most of the things I saw that intrigued me. Continuing on working on my personal fursona image. However I might put up a sketch I did while at comic con that I might flesh out later. My trip has also spurred me to start improving my physical health so once I get through this head cold I'll get started on that with my art. Thanks for the support once again and glad to have at least a two good friends and a mate watching me here.

I got things started on my personal Fursona pic last week. I know I've been promising you guy's this picture with me and my mate but until I hear back from her ya won't see it. Thanks again for being patient with me. I've Also come to announce that over the Next week I won't be able to work on anything since I won't be taking my Laptop to New York with me. Oh yeah that's right I'm going to New York for the Wednesday through Sunday this week. Why you may ask? Well Because one of my oldest friends from high school and I are going to NYCC(New York Comic Con). Leaving tomorrow night so I can meet up with him when he lands. Other than that, That's what's happening this week. See you next week with reflections on my week there.

So by that logic at 2:00 am on Tuesday for me is still Monday Update time. Finalizing my project for my mate took a lot longer than I thought but that's due to it being a dual picture. Last finalization components will be complete tomorrow morning and the one I"m posting here will be up shortly after I hear back from my darling mate hopefully Later this week. I Will start work on my personal Solo Fursona pic sometime in the middle of the week. Other than that. Not much on my mind I think I'll hit sac now.

New Monday Update. The Picture for my mate is almost done should be done tonight or early tomorrow. Then There are a few things that it has to undergo before final posting especially since it's not a real gift unless the person who it's for gets it first. This one won't be a look into my Process. Still looking for input on whether to finish up my fursona or One of my story characters. Lots of new things to look forward to. Hope my watchers if they read this journal will take a moment to read the last one if they haven't. Other than that See you all next week. Have a good day and be safe.

It's Monday about two weeks after I made my second Journal post ever. I haven't made any updates in that time and I felt you should know that my time table on my art has been moved back about another week. I know there are only three people watching me but i'm glad they are who they are. If you're reading this my love I hope you're doing well and feeling fine I also hope I can hear from you sometime soon I miss you a lot. To my friend Annabelle I hope your "children" are doing fine as well as you. Lastly to my helpful supportive friend that big red dragon I know hope things are going well for you too. So basically to recap on the art time line update I'm looking to finish the pic for my dearest heart this week so I won't have this conversation with you again on next Monday. Then The other two Pics one of my fursona and one of the characters from my storybook fur filled world. Again I didn't get much response from you guy's as to which one should get done first so if you do look at this Journal I'd like a recommendation. Lastly once again be safe and well my friends and my dear heart. Until I can speak with you again Hugs for my friends and a kiss for my love.

Art Schedule?
Yeah so here it is fellow watchers my second Journal post. Another set of thoughts straight from the artist him self. I felt like I should start to give my self some better regulation with the speed of my art so I actually start getting things I want posted. So that being said On my mind for tomorrow and the next week is the Art Project for my dear mate. Once that is finished there are two pieces that are closest to posting. One is a Full personal Character Page my fursona. The other is character from my personal universe a Large Tiger male done in my new style. I'll start setting more of a dead line for them once I get that first picture complete. I would like to see all three projects done before the end of September I feel if I keep at a steady pace this is a very accomplish-able goal. I look forward to seeing what you think of them. Thanks for watching as always. I'm very appreciative of the close friends who are watching me. Comments are always welcomed by anyone of course. So that's pretty much what's on my mind for tonight. Pretty straight forward. If any of my watchers have an opinion as to which of the two they'd like to see completed first after my special gift to my mate. I don't really have a preference so a little input would help me make the decision easier.

First off I would like to say thank you to everyone at the con. Personal Thank you's to the Guest of Honor's David Hopkins, and Syber. Thank you to the con staff in particular Sorin, and Rocky/"Rock Fox". Thank you to every fur who participated in the Fur Parade on Saturday. Thank you to the Freedom Service dogs of America. Thank you to all the Patrons/Super Patrons and supporters. The first day of the con was easily my most enjoyable despite me mostly being in shell shock to being really first time jumped into the pool of the fur community. I had a wonderful breakfast at the cafe at the hotel with my Panda friend Annabelle. Opening ceremonies were wonderful. Going to the First time at a con hosted by Rocky Primarily with his two enjoyable counterparts for the entire explanation. After which there was the Be our Guest panel went to which was basically a Q&A session with David & Syber. I hope none of the questions ended up being too embarrassing for you. I know it was a bit of a slow start but sometimes when fans meet up with their Idols it's a bit tricky to get going. Sometime in between panels we went and checked out the dealer's den for a while. My panda friend got her tail fixed and I purchased my first tail. We both got a chance to spend time and see David at his booth I gave him my personal portfolio for the con which in all honesty didn't really match the theme of the con at all. After that my friend and I went to the Art Jam in executive room B which was really fun. I chose to be a Patron for this con because I did want to support the con and the community. I'm much better with words when I'm typing them instead of when I want to say things. I went to the Cocktail party for the Patrons because my friend told me I had to. I did go. I had some popcorn and sat awkwardly in part of the room for the better part of my time there. I want to say Thank you to Rocky again for doing his best to include me. I'm sorry I wasn't more open I was made more comfortable by your presence and I'd gladly come back and try again better next year. After this me and my friend had discussed going to the dance but with her being tired I understood and we departed from our first day of the Con.

On the second day of the con. We were there early enough to go to see From Amateur to Pro panel, From which we saw the Writing for commercial Publication Panel. Both were wonderful panels and I applaud their hosts. From there we went to David's GOH Panel other wise Dubbed Flying Milkshakes. It was Excellent David you're just amazing if you ever read this never let anyone tell you anything different. Thank you for Drawing FNAR before the group who was there. It really was quite a worth while experience. From there My friend and I got ready to watch the upcoming Furry Parade which included another stop to the dealers den. The Parade was Amazing a sight to behold and i took a large number of pictures. Everyone was great in their Fur suites I was astounded by a large quantity of them. All were primarily well done. After this we were going to go to the Fursuiting on a Budget panel before my friend had to leave but it was unfortunately canceled at the last moment. I do understand why the panelist canceled but it was my personal biggest low point of the con even more so than being silent and stoic while most of the other patrons knew each other. I didn't really want to see much else the rest of the day so after my friend left I did the same.

On the Final day there was no time for my friend to show up or arrive. I First off made a donation to the charity with the spare cash i hadn't spent at the dealers den on the other days. So I went to the Going Pro as a Furry artist Held by Rukis and Myenia. This was another well done panel but I think I sat a bit too far back since it was pretty early in morning for most people. And there were times where it was hard to hear Rukis. It was still a very good panel though hosted by two good friends by the looks of things. I didn't spend much time at the con on Sunday, but with me leaving soon I had made plans to meet some of my other friends later in the day so I could finish some important business with them.

Packing up tonight and getting things ready to post my first piece of furry art to an actual site. I will Also spend some time putting up the non art protected parts of my Pokemon portfolio. So that i can give better explanations on my thought process and the final images. I never Thought I'd be doing a journal on here but This seamed like a bunch of things i needed to say. Once again Thanks to Every Fur who made this Con possible. I Look forward to next year especially since I find Doomsday this year unlikely. As David says at the end of his arc's TTFN :)