well, im done with most of my commissions now, gonna be getting into my request list pretty soon if nothing comes up. this have been a bit bumpy lately, but luckly, there are alwasy good days to follow, just got to hang in there. Graduation went somewhat ok, just wish I remembered what row I was on, and forgot to turn my tassle to the left after getting my diploma case *was comming back for welding anyways, lol* but it went ok, talked to my friends one last time, the rolled out. so now I guess things are suposed to get started for me......but if I cant get that license, then I wont be working at the dealership, got to work on that more than anything else. That or I can whore myself out to people for cheap commissions, gotta make money somehow. bu yeah, all but two commissions left. and saving the best for last *nudges xilimyth a bit*


 EnigmaDragan finished
 Yellow07 Finished
 xilimyth 20%
 Sodalite Finished
 Mythil 0%
 Eikaridu Finished


request/trades list
 luccamanadragon 0%
 deaconchaos 0%
 dragoneer 50% Needs color
 carablack 0%
 Allester 40%
 ebondragon 0%
 almightylord 10%
 docsonar 50%
 xeon-dathy 5%

If there was no malaka, the FA community would grind to a halt and theyre computers would by dead. Malaka owns my ass now, seeing as this is the *counts on his fingers* 3rd or 4th time he has bailed me out of computer troubles and walked me through fixing that i thought was unfixable. So wheever you see malaka, everybody thats gotten help from him, thanks him, he diserves it.lol

In all seriousness though, thank the friends that I have that gave time and put up with my negitiveness to help my get this thing back to running. had to ask a few folks in YIM luckly had mobius and malaka there to help that night. Although it BSODed on me yesturday morning, it has now returned to normal and hasnt jumped out of line yet. Thankfully.

Also a word of warning if you hadnt seen it yet. there is a virus going around thas acts like a anitvirus called, Anti Virus 2008. and it tries to automatically install on your computer, and the only way to avoid it is to try to exit out of the tab your on or whatever, or close out the whole page. i dont know the full extent of it, but I know its probably bad. Just thought id let everyone know before someone opens it

once again, i killed my computer and it now blue screen on boot up. It was all due to me trying to ptch XP so it can be activated without having to add the code and all that. I stopped the program from finishing because it said to run it in safe mode when I was installing it and then restart it, so I thought i was doing it wrong and that it might mess something up if I ran it normally....god why do i even fuck with programs like that, I honestly dont know, thats like torrenting a OS, you'll never know if it either works of fucks something up....and I fucked something up trying on all accounts. SO this means that all commissions are frozen til further notice...and if you see me in YIM and if its not important, please, please dont message me saying you want to RP or whatever, its been saved for emergencies only, seeing as this piece of shit laptop cant fucking handle the load of multitasking, any kind. So im just gonna be talking to coputer furs mainly, and try to see what ive jacked upp this time. Well, anyway, thats the situation on things now. Im planning on trying to reinstall windows on one of the hard drives and work my way up from there, just hope it works.

Never, and I mean NEVER, for any reason what so ever other than meeting new friends and sharing art, should you add my account name you your IM list. Im telling ya right now. No RPs, no e dates, and please, please, do not add me because you seem my account icon and think im a girl, this one guy has done that already, even rested to uysing the name of an artist here on FA to fool me into adding him. So, unless you PM me, or whatever, Im no longer leaving my IM address up. ad Im gonna ask who everybody is before adding, just to make sure your who you say your are. Also.....im not a good looking person, and not cut out for love....been a fool of it, and now just nopt even gonna get on that level with anyone anymore. If your not here physically, or within a skip and a hop away *34 miles or less* then its not gonna work out. that, and if we hadnt known eachother of longer than 5 months, then Im sure its not gonna last either. Im very female biased, so im sorry if im not gay....I mean, one offer was very flattering, but I just couldnt do it....i couldnt find it in me. Also, i understand changes have to be made, but non too drastic....and please, if I cant hold to it, then at least accept me for who I am, not what I look like. And dont lie to me if I tshow you a pic of me...and dont butter me up neither, Im ugly, and nothing in this world short of plastic surgery is gonna change that, lol. But in all seriousness....im trying to limit the amount of these things as much as possible. Just dont think im up to all that anymore......and its driving me into the dirt.

well, im done with most of my commissions now, gonna be getting into my request list pretty soon if nothing comes up. this have been a bit bumpy lately, but luckly, there are alwasy good days to follow, just got to hang in there. Graduation went somewhat ok, just wish I remembered what row I was on, and forgot to turn my tassle to the left after getting my diploma case *was comming back for welding anyways, lol* but it went ok, talked to my friends one last time, the rolled out. so now I guess things are suposed to get started for me......but if I cant get that license, then I wont be working at the dealership, got to work on that more than anything else. That or I can whore myself out to people for cheap commissions, gotta make money somehow. bu yeah, all but two commissions left. and saving the best for last *nudges xilimyth a bit*


 EnigmaDragan finished
 Yellow07 Finished
 xilimyth 20%
 Sodalite Finished
 Mythil 0%
 Eikaridu Finished
 Eradragon Finished

request/trades list
 luccamanadragon 0%
 deaconchaos 0%
 dragoneer 50% Needs color
 carablack 0%
 eradragon 30%
 Allester 40%
 ebondragon 0%
 almightylord 10%
 docsonar 50%
 xeon-dathy 5%

 EnigmaDragan Sketches=50% colored=0%
 Yellow07 -sketches=100% Gimp ink/color, 20%
 xilimyth (starting sometime today)
 Sodalite (should start sometime soon)
 Mythil (might start sometime next week)




Just giving a list of commissions Ive built up. Its just a small number of people, but in a greater volume of work. So I guess I'll hold off on taking anymore until later. Also, I need to run a check on my requested art, and make sure that stays up to date...and also to keep it on my mind.

request/trades list

 luccamanadragon 0%
 deaconchaos 0%
 dragoneer 50% Needs color
 carablack way over due
 eradragon N/A
 Allester 40%
 ebondragon needs to start on that
 almightylord needs to start on that too
 docsonar bout to start on it ASAP
 xeon-dathy Gonna work on it sometime today

and then theres the other random pics I have to do, and some I still need to color, so yeah.....work work work..

well, gonna take commissions now......got no other choice. Im gonan try to get the best mother board, hard drive and CPU that money could buy.....nothing more nothing less. Im tired of this POS fucking me over.....tired of all the other shit that happes to it too. So Im taking out the HDDs and ditching the old RAM, and CPU. I need to try to get about 200 or 250 for the computer, and hopefully when I get my pell grant from the school....I'll have enough combined to get a new one, and fix my truck, once and for all. I have 86 dollars in my account at this point, and possible have about 160 when I get done with these two for Enigma and for Yellow07. Just tired and frustriated right now..but anyway, this would really help me out of the hole too.

Im not even gonna change that much, just like 15 or 20 bucks or so for a colored, pic in OC or GIMP. whichever you want. and about 5 or 10 for a sketch or something....I dunno, make me an offer, and I'll take it. I just need the money right now.

dont accept nothing from my msn account........NOTHING.......it seems people have nothing better to do in there lives than send viruses around. Damn idiots......banning my msn account once agin until further notice

well, just wanted to let everyone know that for a while, most of the art posted will be commissions or ideas im thinking of on point, or some suggested by friends on FA. My request list is still kinda full, even though I cleaned it out twice *i think* but eitherway, just though Id say that. Plus the commissioners all tell me to just take my time and have fun, so I guess I try to get a pic or two in between commissions. Anyway, thats all I was going to say, that, and I need to repost my commission info......which I took down long ago cause I couldnt do them without paypal, or a bank account. Thought that I needed a bank account for it to work, but It seems now I only need it to buy stuff online. So yeah, commissions are a go once again with me. Gonna give it another shot.

I said it once before and I'll say it again. COME DANCE WITH THE ANGELS!!! Find out what a real brawl really is!. AC6 style. Anytime Baby

when will I learn to keep my mouth shut....lol.....I just like to run around talking about stupid shit online that dont makes since. http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/.....7/#cid:2362178



BEHOLD!!!
me and all my loserness!!!!

just plain and simple, Im just gonna go draw, and thats it, when I open my mouth stupid shit comes out of it. So you know, I'll just hush on things like that, no matter how much I want to join in....it just makes me look dumb. So yeah, no more Journals for me for a while
and I know Im gona catch alot of flak for it too......eh....as long as i go back to being less known im fine

please refrain from sending bogus letters or info to me. Someone sent something talking about someguys name that has a virus on it, and that it kills hard drives and all that shit, and to send it to others to warn them about it. Alright, I send the damn thing to everyone on my list, and when I got in just now, sombody was all pissed at me, saying dont send me no bullshit chainletters like this or something like that. Hell I didnt know it was, but that was no damn reason to fly off the fuck handle like that. So I sent another letter to the previous guy *a friend on my list* to dont send anymore letters or info that isnt true. damn, its bad enough when people yell at me, dont need someone else from somewhere else that I dont even know that good yelling at me too. Damn! DONT SEND ME SHIT LIKE THAT!!!! Keep it to yourself.

if anyone out there has received a invite or has seen someone on XB live named Big S 225, then that was me. Just though id say something in case people were wondering, or just to let everyone know.

Well, got back from my friend's room, borrowed Halo3 from him *hope he lets me keep it for the weekend, want to rackup some points before this month is up* but when I got back, then damn door wouldnt unlock, so I had to go though a friends' room and come through the back. When I did that, I unlocked the door, the pressed the lever down and it latch thing when in, but didnt come out. Son ow, Im going to have to go to sleep, with a busted door, with my game and stuff in my room. told the door parents and then asked to see if I can get someone to come and fix it. So its possible that Im going to wind up skipping out o class tomorrow morning or whenever the get it fixed, then to aftr that, go back to class. *sighs* so yet again, some goes wrong, but hey, on the bright side, I just scored Halo3 for the mean time. Whch is cool if my game does walk up and leave in the middle of the night. Also, I can chat to people online on my 360 *slowly due to the controller* so its lightly that Im going to be chating from there for the time being.

been fooling around with my truck, changed the valvecover gaskets and all. Caught hell doing that, and the damn thing still leaks alittle around the vavle covers, near the rear corner. And to add to that, the water hoses that run to my throttle body, are leaking because of the clamps aint no good, and one of the screw in one broke due to it eing old and because I over tightened it, lol. *sighs* ohh well I guess its back to the old drawing board for me, just gonna buy some new hose clamps and try that first, if only now if I can find out how to get that old one with the broke screw off there to put the new one on....gotta love those problems that accure after other problems.

This was something I just sat around the house over the holidays and though about. Why is it when this time of year rolls around, their is a burst in christmas art involving reindeer and reindeer themed art/porn. I mean, I know youre in the spirit of the month, and Im not hating or nothing, but, why do most of them look like the same old then from years past? There mostly reindeer fuckalongs, with both male and females *no herms this year for some reason, lol* and them having these massive orgies which some call, "reindeer games"? I mean, Ive seen quite a few, that reminded me I seen last time, or two years ago. its like we use the same ones, even if youve never seen the original one, or know/knew anyone else that drew one like it, over and over, in the same or similar scene. Even *insert name here* said that it does tend to get repetitive over the years. Now, I have seen some that were original and didnt fall into that reindeer "fuckalong" cliche, and that made them special. i cant name them all, but those people are some of the most creative i seen in the art world.
Another thing that says Chistmas/Yiffmas *whatever you use* is when everybody starts breaking out the Red and Green outfets. I just wonder...why red and green? I mean, whynot black and red? lol What about kamillion *flip flop* color? Or something phycadelic? Lol, I know its supposed to be like a present sorta thing, but in my day, we didnt use no fancy gift wrap, we used scotch tape, and newspaper for each gift. It was a very ghetto christmas I tell ya that.
One more thing I notice, was there were reindeer, with antlers, and there were females....with antlers. Im like, "huh/ I though that when females had antlers, they were herms?" well, I guess has its own set of rules, that, or they just trade there dicks in for the winter, lol. Anyway, I ask *a friend* about that, and just wondered. "Did anyone change the rules while I was sleep?" Guess they were absent having there own games no one was watching. anyhoo, no herms this go round, always next year.

I was going to do something for christmas, but I just played Scrooge and said, "Ahh, fuck this" and not drew anything. too many things that involved reindeer fucking eachother and big brested women in gift wrapping outfets. Didnt want to follow the crowd so I didnt draw anything.
*sighs* well, I think thats all i remember I was going to say for now. Im going to fool around with fraps and FC *got it working again* on my comp. Have a happy new year people.

Also, if you red this journal then mean youre a nerd with nothing better to do, lol.
Anyway, this is just my thoughs of the matter

WARNING...THESE ARE ONLY OPINIONS BASED OFF ONE CRAZY BLACK GUY AND DO NOT REFLECT THE VIEWS OF ANYONE ELSE!! SO THEREFORE, THEY SHOULDNT BE TAKEN OUT OF CONTEXTED!!! LOL

well, seeing as this WAS the main reason I was MIA for a while on MSN and Yahoo, and I got nothing better to do, i think im gonna say alittle something about this game.

Lock on is a flight sim, for those who want something close to flying the real deal, so if its not of interest, then its not for you. Try out the game malaka reviewed, it might be better for ya. Anyway, back on subject. Running it, and then the 1.11 or 1.12a/b patches, the graphics look alot better, not by much, but its enough to tell the different when your flying the Su25T, an upgraded Su25 thats aso known as a Su39. The background looks better and the lighting is just right to add a near photo op look when flying in a sunset or sunrise. All the planes are tweaked and the setup is changed up a bit as well, *like for the Eagle, you have to use a different button to launch missles and to fire the guns, as like with the real F15 or A10. And the physics are better to, for instance, crashes arnt always somewhat the same as with Lock on gold or any 1.01/1.02. You could snag a wing on something like a building, structure, or the ground, and the wing would break off, or some part of the pane wouldcome apart. Sometimes the plane would just desentigrate as pieces littered the runway or landscape, and this also encludes SAM hits which make your engine accually catch fire, or explode. Even makes the ejection seats fail from the shock. The radars are better, and the missiles do better too. bombs are still hard to drop and rockets are deadly if they contact. There are lots of FC compatable mods, like the one that adds all planes. And lots of skin and texture upgrades to let you customize your planes, permitted the mods worked or didnt cancel eachother out. All in all, its ok.

Now for the bad. um, lets see, star force sucks balls. Download the reg save program that keeps your keys when you reinstall and change HDs or something. Star force is a bitch. And some of the rumors thats were going around on the net say it does alot of other undesirerable things to go on. The FPS on this, sucks. when you get down to business, it lags, and if you put it on the low setting, it might good, but the graphcs are going look crappy. the missle firing systems are tricky to get use to in the russian planes. Sometimes I dont know when or when not to fire. So I wait til I get authorisation to shoot from the comp, which sucks cuz by then, and amramm is already 8m away from me and thats usually when I start manuevering to avoid id, but diving then breaking hard. The Su25T, although a great step over the older 25, is majorly underpowered. even if you decrase fuel levels tp balance out the plane, or if your not at full weight, it hesitates on take off, and if fish tails when you ar at a climing angle, or if youre turning or flying upwards with the throttle firewalled, it fishtails, you fight to keep it from rooling, but when you level out, it rolls in the opposite diretion and then your just going along for the ride after that if your at love level, or below 2300 feet. And fog screws with its altimeter and sometimes make it see like your higher than what it really is. And last but not least. the ilga, this renegade, with a shoulder luanched missle, can make your day go sour in a heartbeat. you get hit in the engine, just bail out, dont hesitae like I do, just bail out, and let the plane smash into the ground. the front of the wings are the same. although, with the A10, its closer to the centerof the wings. the best thing to do is carry all missiles and launch em lond range, sticking them before they have time to shoot back.

All in all, its worth it all. The game is pretty decent, and it could get addictive if you find yourself flying at low level blowing the crapp out of the enemy while they just desperately try to down you til and ilga hit you, then you kamaze the last target you can reach before your plane becomes part of the landscape. lol. Hell I like it alot, just wish start force would just crawl in a hole and die. thats the major killer for that game, and I congradulate starforce for giving them the boot.

but if you get it to work, and path it to 1.12a, dont mess with it, as long as it works, lol. Right now, Im going to try to get mine to rework again, lol. thats all for now, be back to posting pretty soon.

http://www.furaffinity.net/view/906085/ and http://www.furaffinity.net/view/913559/ are by far to two most viewed pics ive drawn so far. Guess I got the mix just right with those two or something, that or alot of people have been looking at it from fav lists and from my gallery, lol. Either way, im surprised at that, guess I need to do more like it sometime. Still needz to finish that other stuff I started like that comic and he tf thing with osaka though. but I guess those were more of a long term project with me. heh anyway, back to what I do best, drawing big boobs and cocks on females.

Other than checking my emails, Im no longer using my msn account until further notice. Some how I got liked and this virus thing, and now i think my comp is fucked as far as msn goes. So im no longer going to try to use it until I reinstall windows again. Just more comp problems. Either way, it think its best that I quarintine myself from anyone on msn or even yahoo till I figure something out. Just giving everybody the heads up if it seems I be gone or dont replay .

im fucking tired of my life, and everything i do. I just get tired of the same shit repeating itself every fucking time. And today, it finally got to me. I really wish my stepdad, hell I wouldnt even give that drunk bastard that fucking title, I wished something bad would happen to him, I cursed and screamed that one day, I will fuck him up royally. Put the fucker on a fucking streatcher, and have him eating from a fucking straw. Im just tire d of his fucking stupidity. I was kinda blaming my mom for even sending that mother fucker to get me from collage, but now, I just wish it would all come to an end. I feel as though my whole fucking life is a bunch of shit that will never get straigthened out normally, and only would be resolve by voilence and hatred. I feel as though there is no such thing as a good life, and there is no such thing as happyness. This shit will most likely never stop, and i will most likely kill him or myself as a result of this. I broke out cring today in my room, not for him, but from all the anger and pain in my heart. Nothing inside me is good, nothing is pleasent, and I damn sure will never recover from this. Im gonna just go on in life, feeled with nother but hatred towards others and void of any feelings. Never giving a shit about no one else, cept myself. could care less about humanity at this point. I just want this to end. I want it to all go away..............just wish something would happen...... Fuck this shit, fuck my sucky ass life. and fuck everything else. I dont wont to deal with it anymore.

well, I cleaned out my watches cause mainly I let them get too full to reply to them all, and now, I see that i have a new watch, from that same person or bot. I was really thinking our axing this account and geting a new one if something syarts messing up on it again. Get a new name and whatnot. dont know if this is some sort of joke, or someone trying to bug my account, but Im gonna keep a watch on this so see if anything else goes wrong. Last I checked, I though that you couldnt get watches and mail from banned and bot accounts, but, guess FA aint been updating itself lately. eh anyways, i pretty sure some one has gotten a watch from fockfuxer577x, so I might just egnoe this if nothing weird happens like last time

well, I dont know whats up with this site, but I got a PM from a banned person by the name of fockfuxer5771337. It was all in some binayr crap, or something, and shortly after that, the site started acting funny and the computer dropped the signal. I dont know whether it was a dead PM or some random error or something, I mean, i cant explain the shitty ness of the school net, but Idont know what the hell was up with the random email, and certain words on submissions turning into random numerals and stuff. I dunno, maybe it was just a glitch. Just hope it dont happen again.

I needs RAM, good RAM. No Centron RAM, Centron sucks my furry balls. Getting kingston RAM to see if thats the problem. and I hope it is. if not that, then I'll need a new motherboard. This computer of mine is just a money pit, it and the truck both are. Speaking of vehicles, somebody stole my fuckin door locking mechnism. That or it has frozen up again from my uncle not closing it. But from all the evendence, it looks like someone went in it. Im getting pissed at the amount of crap that keeps going wrong with that car in the process it takes to get it back together. Im gonna try to get it out of the way sometime next year. that way, no one will keep shit in it, or take stuff off of it anymore.

Anyway, comp problem have limited me to IMs only, no OCing of any kind and limited webs surfing capabilities. So im struggling with this atm. Anyways, I'll post an update as soon as I get stuff together

Well, its time for another rant fest from me, bigshow. I kinda think this might come out to all who watch dubbed animes out there, and I know it probably pissed you off too, I know it does to me though.
Its when the company or whatever, changes the fuckin voice actors whenever a new season start, although they keep the main character's voice, everybody elses either change pitch or change al together. What a loud of fuck shit! Case in point, when I just got back here, I was thinking, "hey Im gonna watch me some One Piece tonight". I get in the house, stop the VCR from recording, rewind the tape to the end of naruto, and then hit the record button. I noticed, it was comming on differently, like one of those season change deals. And I was like, "cool, new season". But then, all of a sudden, I started to hear to butchered horror fest that was the voice change, the very same shit I have been exposed to when I waited soo fucking long to see those new episodes of DBZ then I was in Jr High, then when they finally came out, I was like, WTF!! Why did they change the voices, like nobody gonna know! I mean, specially when the accent change is as clear as fuckin day, it makes you not want to watch it. I mean, your use to listening to how they originally sounded, but then out of the blue, they change shit on you, and youre wondering what the fuck is wrong with there voices. its a shit load of fuck is what it is. And dont think those home grown cartoons arent emune to the voice switcharoo neither. They are even worse when thye do that shit, it makes a cartoon sound horrible, and more eritating. Im just tired of hearding those weird ass voices everytime they change the anime or cartoon voice actors, like they couldnt find noone that sounded like the original voice actor, to make it sound like nothing new, like ive seen in some anime and cartoons, but no, why just hand pick someone for the job and make the cartoon sound awfull
Whats even worse then that, is when they change there art styles and cartoon looks, making the characters look deformed or just plain weird from what they originally looked. They did this shit to *oh god im about to say it* American dragon, and it when from good enough *to where id watch it from time to time* to fuck that shit it sucks donkey ball sac horrible!! I never watched that shit after that, and to boot, there characters voices sounded ive more annouying that last time, WHAT WHERE THEY FUCKING THINKING!!?? Is sickning to watched that happen, they think kids like wack looking character, but damnit its not cool, its sucks, and it makes it seem like the creators or lazy, cheap and untalented, like a 3 year old could have done better, i mean, just look at most of the cartoons now, most of them, at least to me, are trying to copy that Hanna Barbere style, which, now, is just discracing them rather than honoring them, cuz I mean, they probably didnt want there names linked to crappy ass shit like what they're spewing out there asshole right now. Its a discrace to cartoons, its a discrace to them, and t fucking sickning

Contractors, cartoonist, and anime dubbing companies.......
STOP FUCKING WITH THE DYNAMICS OF YOUR CARTOONS, VOICES OR THERE LOOKS!!!
if it works, then dont fucking change it.

also.......STOP FUCKING DRAWING CRAPPY ASS CARTOONS!!!!!
there fucking horrible!!! A 3 year old could do fuckin better than that diarea fest of a fuckin cartoon you make. IT FUCKING SUCKS!!! DRAW BETTER AND MAKE BETTER CARTOONS

AND STOP FUCKING UP THE VOICES



DAMNIT!!!!

and dont tell me to just watch it in fuckin japanese, with elglish subs, I hate fuckin reading subs on TV!! unless its something in shot on scene or is on a movie of documentary, I dont want to fucking read it!! I already try to enjoy the damn thing, now I got to read it now and take my eyes off whats happening on the anime and loose that little enjoyment I DO have. So Fuk dat!