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Hey guys!! I'm in my new home. I can't even begin to thank everyone who thought about me these past few months, donated toward my mom's funeral or my move, spread the word, and just everything else. After 13 years on this platform, I feel incredibly, truly blessed to have a community like this one, with so many people who love Sonic or just art in general, and genuinely care about others and want to help them. You guys are amazing, and all of this experience has humbled me without question. From the bottom of my heart, thank you!!!

I just arrived this noon. I'm exhausted, frankly. I'd been up 24 hours. The toll the trip had on my health was the most difficult thing about it, but I managed to make it through despite everything trying to hold me back. I prayed a lot, and had a lot of support from my friends to get me through it. Here I am! and I feel amazing. I only slept a few hours but that's fine, my internal clock tells me I get up early for now, so sleeping during the day is a no-go.

SO! TO BUSINESS!!

Now that I'm here, I want to honor this community's generosity with equal hard work. Up front, I need to buy a new PC tower and power supply because I left those behind, couldn't fit them in my suitcases. Having a 50 pound weight limit on each luggage made me have to leave a LOT behind. I should be able to afford those new pc supplies on my own now, in part because of my leftover cash from the donations I received. So again, thank you guys.

IF I OWE YOU A COMMISSION...
Please DM me ASAP!! I don't care if it's been a year, or a few months or weeks. If I owe you, DM me so I can organize my list of commissions and get things rolled out to you amazing people who've waited so patiently for my life to stop spiraling out of control. I can't wait to get working for you, truly! So please DM me if I owe you, and remind me what the job is! If you don't do that and I do owe you, I will likely try to reach out if I remember about it. I'll be looking through my DMs to make sure I don't miss anybody.

Don't worry if you don't reach out right away because you missed this journal. Not DMing is not the same as not claiming owed work. I WILL deliver to everyone who commissioned me. <3

Anyway, I've a lot to do, but right now I'm going to focus on recovering my health and buying those PC parts so I can get to work. I adore all of you!

P.S! I'll be on the lookout for people struggling. Don't be afraid to reach out if you were like me, and in a situation so dire/tough that you needed a helping hand. I'll be a hand that helps, even if it isn't much. I'll do what I can.

P.S.S! The collab with was funded fully! I'll be doing some sexy fun Sally stuff soon! <3

My train departure is set for the 18th, but I have to leave my home by the 9th. I haven't yet reached the goal of the fundraiser yet, and I need the rest of the funds to pay for luggage to pack my things. I might have to open emergency commissions if I don't make that goal, and I owe a decent bit as it is.

So if anyone can donate toward the fundraiser(help me move, and help make the Sally tentacle art series a reality!) please consider it here: https://ko-fi.com/blazeymix0198

I'm sorry for bugging so much lately, but this is really it. I don't have much time left :< Thanks for the well wishes and generosity everyone <3

P.S. If interest in an emergency commission to help out that way, please note me. If I already owe you, think twice about it, because I feel really bad I still owe people right now, and I wanna get back to work asap.

Hey again. Now that the funeral is behind me, I have to look ahead. I can't afford to live on my own in this apartment I shared with my mom :(

So, I've a place across the country that'll take me in. I gotta pay to get there though. DX

To achieve that, and I are hosting a fundraiser, with the goal achieved bringing everyone a brand new art pack series that is a remake of his Jerry the Tentacle Monster series. He'll be doing remakes of each of his old pics, and I'll be doing original art for the pic series myself! My friend JayNaytor agreed to contribute too, so we got a nice juicy art pack in the works for ya'll, but we need your help to make it happen! (And to get me to my new home safely <3)

Please consider donating if you're able and wanna see the new art pack come to life :)

Art pack sketch preview: https://www.furaffinity.net/view/59628914/

Donate here: https://ko-fi.com/blazeymix0198
Thank you <3

Hey. Happy New Year everyone. Just wanted to let you guys know what's going on, especially my commissioners <3

So, my mother's funeral is the 17th. After that, I'll be packing, cleaning, moving across the country in Feb. It's going to be hard and hectic... but, you guys are always on my mind. That goes for the amazing folks who donated as well to my mother's funeral. We couldn't quite spring for a righteous burial but we're doing a cremation instead.

So, by the end of Feb I should be in my new home, and then I'll give you guys another update letting you know that I'm settled. Then, I can finally get back to work finishing my comms. I got a lot of great ones waiting, so I'm excited to get back to it finally. Sorry once again for the wait on things, to those commissioners in particular. You know who you are. I know we have a bit of a reputation with how slow we can be with commissions but in my case I always try to keep in touch with my buyers and let em know what's going down. For anyone waiting on Sallyhot, for example, he's less good about communication but there's nothing wrong with hitting me up if you need reassurance or are worried or anything.

Anyway, rambling aside, I love ya'll, I'll be back soon <3

Special shout out to my blue-haired bestie for being so supportive and generous when I needed it most.

So I'm here and I'm making a journal about something I never expected to. I know we've all been there or will be there but, it's.. never easy.

Donate: https://ko-fi.com/blazeymix0198
or here, my brother's gofundme: https://www.gofundme.com/f/assist-b.....omer&utm_source=facebook

What's this about?

(What led to today)
For those who haven't read my previous journals, I'll summarize. A few years ago, my mom was diagnosed with Cancer. I've lived with her through that, I sat with her in the hospital when she was given the news, and the first thing she said to me was "I don't want to go, I'm scared." She began her treatment not long after that, Chemo and Radiation, and it was some of the roughest times we've been through. Being she was treated in her neck, her skin there would burn badly, and she was in constant pain for weeks, her skin peeled off constantly, and it wasn't until she finally got some prescription ointment that it finally started to heal and stopped hurting so much.

Over the next two years, she had trouble eating(had a feeding tube installed), she lost 80 plus pounds, she lost the strength to walk properly, and eventually fell in the bathroom and fractured her back, leading to her severe decline until she was hospitalized and put on dialysis for her kidneys for a day(Due to a simultaneous UTI). They recovered, but she needed surgery for her back, especially due to a fluid buildup of some kind. She had an infection, and we were told she wouldn't make it long if it wasn't treated. Due to her weight and lack of strength however, she was rejected for treatment, but one hospital accepted her but had no beds. Her health sharply declined here, and then.. well, here we are.

Throughout all of it, I lived with her and was there for it. I watched her lose weight, go through the pain, sob, pray and beg to be healed, I listened to her cries of pain, I helped encourage her to eat and drink her ensures and get her weight up, I learned how to apply medication through an I.V. to treat her infection at home (Different infection), I applied lotion and ointment to the burns on her neck, I made her food, I changed her adult pads(when she couldn't walk anymore) and she'd laugh and point out how she changed me when I was little and now I was doing the same.

I tried my best to make her laugh and smile through it all. She had a great sense of humour and I knew how to push the funny bone with her every time. When I'd change her, I'd give her hip a pat like a baby spanking and she'd always get a kick out of it. I used to make Chris Jericho jokes with her like: "You know what you're gonna get? .......IT!" lol

After all of it, she is finally at rest, she's with God, and I do respect everyone's beliefs or lack of beliefs, I do. but I do genuinely believe she's in heaven, and now that she is, our family needs help burying her properly. That's why I'm making this journal.

(About Rachel P)
What can I say about her? She was a mother, an amazing one. Not perfect, no. but to me she was, flaws and all. When I was too little to remember, she lost all of her kids to foster care because she was young, partying, and irresponsible. Yet when that happened, she dedicated the rest of her life to making up for it. She fought hard to get us back, and managed only to get back me and my sister (out of five). I remember the day I left my foster home and met her, I was about 4, and she was so happy. She had her arms out when we got out of the car, and held onto me and my sister. She worked hard ever since to raise us, literally a single mom working every day at her job. She liked to be social and drink a little, but that habit brought her friends and family together and I got to see my cousins all the time.

Eventually she stopped drinking and just kept doing her best. When she'd come home from working all day, it'd be night usually, but she'd cook for me and my sister, then we'd watch movies and tv shows. To this day, I try to watch things with my best friends on discord because that's how I know to spend time with the people I love, like she did with me and my sis. I love watching her favourite movies, she liked Chris Tucker, Jim Carrey, all the 90s comedies. She liked Tyler Perry, Ice Cube, Adam Sandler, Steven Segal and Liam Neeson. She loved Creed and Rocky movies, she LOVED horror movies like Chucky, Nightmare on Elm Street.

Her favourite show was the Price is Right, she watched that for over 40 years or so? Since the 70s or 80s. She'd never known much about the internet, but after she was diagnosed, she discovered google on her phone, then the next three years was her telling me facts about healthy diets, fruits, cancer fighting foods.. lol And she finally played an online multiplayer game, she became a true gamer on Yahtzee, she played that every day, she loved it, winning or losing.

Aside from that, she was a Leo, she had a bit of a temper, but she was always willing to listen and learn and care. Up until the last five or so months she wanted to do everything herself but I still helped. She hated the idea of not being independent, she was a true fighter and trooper. My mom loved her kids so much, she loved God, and loved life. She was a proud Walmart Associate, working Cashier for almost 20 years before she had to leave. She loved Walmart too lol She was a heavy talker, she never stopped when you got her started, but that's the case for my family, we took after her.

I could go on but, hopefully that gives some insight onto the kind of person she was. She had her likes, dislikes, and moments, but above it all, she was a mother, the best I could've asked for. I'll never stop missing her.

(Donations for her funeral)
The situation we're in right now, frankly.. we're not ready. We can't afford the funeral, even to cremate we're scraping as much as we can and asking for donations, because it will cost us about 7-8k in total to do it. We WANT to do a proper Righteous burial for her, but that will cost 16k. So.. Everyone in the family is trying to seek donations and I'm here in this amazing community with all of the followers I've gathered over 12 years to do the same.

I hate to ask for help like this, I've had to do it once before to put my Bibi(Cat) to rest, but this is much bigger and much harder, and I could use the help of this awesome community. I am sorry to ask, but anything you do help with would be incredibly amazing, and I truly am grateful for that. Even if just spreading the word, or giving well wishes, or just reading this, it all helps. Thank you guys.

I will try to give back to the community for the help. In fact, I'm going to start on a picture series/comic next year after the dust is settled and my commissions are through, to say thank you.

If you'd like to donate to my mother's burial, please consider doing so here:
https://ko-fi.com/blazeymix0198
https://ko-fi.com/blazeymix0198
https://ko-fi.com/blazeymix0198

or here if preferred: https://www.gofundme.com/f/assist-b.....omer&utm_source=facebook

Everything sent to me will go directly to the funeral.

When I was told the news yesterday morning I didn't feel anything like.. almost numb. I heard my brother crying and I just.. listened. but when he hung up and I walked around my empty home and found her room, I lost it. All of her things are now just things. An empty kitchen, an empty recliner.

I knew it'd hurt, just not how much. There's plenty of you out there that know, and I'm really sorry for your loss, if that's you. We all go through it, we see this happen. It's hard, very hard.

My next two months are going to be chaos. I have to somehow get myself across the country to my new room mates, cause I can't afford this apartment. I have some plans to do so, but there's also the funeral to worry about.

When the dust is settled, I'm settled. I'll be finishing everything I owe one at a time, and I wont accept new stuff until that's done. Omega445, GBHPrime, and everyone else that's supported me and have been waiting, I'm thinking of you and I'll do right by you, I promise.

I hate making folks wait. Feels like a betrayal of trust in some ways. Things happen, I know. That's the nature of this art business thing. Still, you guys mean the world to me, especially the folks that like my art enough to pay me to do it. <3 I'll see you soon.

Look for an update within a few weeks on my life and things.
In advance, I appreciate the well wishes/condolences, even if I don't reply to every comment.

Rachel P. 7/27/1961 - 12/14/2024

Hey guys. Thanks for your well wishes for my mom. She's been through a lot over the past three/four years. Cancer hit her hard, and for those who have seen or experienced it up close, radiation is an ass kicker.

She's made it through that, but well, recovering fully has been hard. I won't get into the details really, but as far as this recent hospital incident went, it's still ongoing. At the very least, we no longer have to be afraid she won't make it. She's doing a lot better in fact, her kidneys only needed dialysis once, and the docs said the fact they haven't needed her on it for a day is a good sign. Her UTI is also being treated. There's more issues but, it looks like she's okay and well, I'm okay! because we're all super relieved.

That being said, I've taken a few days off working on art for obvious reasons but I'll be back at it here quickly. Thanks for being there for me folks! :)

I also would like to do a black Friday sale thing maybe with commissions to pay for some bills. So stay tuned for that info. Anyway, seeya soon <3

I don't really go on about my personal life here. There's been a few exceptions, like during my worst case of depression or when my cat Bibi needed help with being put to sleep and cremation.

I don't think spilling my guts on the internet is ever really a good idea. Still, things have been hard at home because of my mom's condition. A UTI she kept failing to take her meds for progressed into something serious, to the point her kidneys are failing and well. I don't know enough but my sister made it sound as though she's fighting for her life in the ICU. It's serious, and I'm at home just thinking. Praying.

Regardless, I'll try to get some more work done, but if things slow down a bit, you'll know why. Take care

Hey guys! Me again. I'm on a new weekly work schedule, I work a three day weekend to try and keep myself from getting burnt out again. So no more working like eight weeks straight and then big 8 month long art block haha.

So, what this means is you'll usually see a new pic every week from now on, as I go through what I owe to my amazingly patient and awesome commissioners. It ALSO means new commissions will now be much more consistently delivered and no one will have to wait so long anymore. :)

So! For those I still owe, if you haven't heard from me yet or you haven't reached out yourself, please do so! And bear in mind, I'm working weekends, so I can usually get one, maybe two things done a week. Don't worry, I'm back at it! :)

I read an interesting journal earlier from an artist on Inkbunny, about just being really horny, basically. In somewhat graphic detail. It was a little funny, maybe that was the intention, but I think it was really unapologetically honest, and I can respect that. It got me thinking about the same thing, just letting it out in a journal, but what would I need to let out?

Definitely not that I'm horny. Cause I mean... Sexual gratification for me personally just seems like.. a very small picture to hang up on the wall in life. I think what I feel most is sorry.

Sorry for the mistakes I've made, the friends I've hurt along the way, how helpless I am at taking care of myself(financially), the fact that I can't make a friend's wedding in Canada because I'm too broke to make the trip, but if I'd worked harder, I could have.

The only thing I obsess about is my past, because I still suffer the consequences to this day, and this isn't a pity party, I don't feel sorry for myself at all. But it's hard to accept my losses and move on. It sucks there's no hope of forgiveness, but it's understandable too.

Sometimes I wish maturing, growing up and learning lessons didn't result in losing people. That's life though, and in the end, if those people are okay in life today, they're happy, that's all that matters. I'm the only one stuck in my head, hating myself for the past after all. I'll get over it eventually, and let myself be happy too. I'm just not in a place in life that I can thrive and enjoy it. I'm stuck at home, with way too much time on my hands. So here we are, lol.

I'm sure a lot of folks are like that, and it can suck, but hang in there. Remember what you enjoy and focus on that. Play vidya games, work on your hobbies, focus on paying work like jobs or commissions, and accomplish goals. I know what to do, but I'm slow at it.

Oh also, if you're a person that can't play something or watch something without a youtube video in the background, consider shutting the video off and practice focusing on just one thing. You might enjoy what you do a little more if your attention isn't so divided. People don't realize how horrible they're abusing their attentions spans thanks to Youtube.

God Bless. <3

Edit: In hindsight I suppose this journal came off a bit more depressing than I intended it too, but to clarify, I'm totally fine. just letting out my inner thoughts, things that creep into my mind from time to time. Don't worry about me, I'm all good.

Hey guys! It's been a slow month unfortunately, a lot of weird things keep getting in the way and slowing down progress, but I should be past all that nonsense. Progress will update much quicker from here on! <3 Check back every few days.

but here is the status of my comms and I'm working hard to get them updated and finished quickly :)

diel4: Flat colours (Shading)... overall progress 70%

LilJohnnyRed: posing phase (finding the right pose)... overall progress 5%

MillaBirch: overall progress 100% DONE

Zeromegas: Planning (finding references)... overall progress 0%

Takal: Sketching... overall progress 15%

A Grilled Fish: Sketching... overall progress 15%

For now. I got all my feb comms, so I'll be working on that. Once I'm clear I'll open em up again for March! Thanks for the interest, love ya'll!

Slots:
1. diel4

2. LilJohnnyRed

3. MillaBirch

4. Zeromegas


I took an extra slot since both asked at like, exactly the same time.

All from IB. Huh, where's the love from my FA pals? :D

If you're still interested in a commission, never fear! You can always let me know and I might sign you up for March. ;)

Thank you for giving me a signal boost, heh

But yeah! If you want something drawn up or coloured, I'm like.. the closest thing to getting a SH commission. I'm like SH jr. or SH lite. Y'know? Eh? Working for ya?

Okay, that's not the best marketing strategy, and the poor guy is doing his best to clear up HIS commissions. But.. I'm not half bad either I suppose. I dunno. *kicks a rock*

All jokes aside, I'd love to draw your ideas :) I seem to do a lot of Sonic themed commissions, the Sonic community is just so awesome about commissions haha. You guys have so many ideas and naughty ones at that. ;) (I also draw other styles and art than Sonic but yeah, Sally is irresistible amiright?)

So what do you say? Get your smexy or cute ideas drawn and you can even help a gal out in the process! Please consider it!

Details:
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/54623435/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/54623435/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/54623435/

examples of finished work and quality:
https://www.furaffinity.net/gallery.....sion-Airbrush/

Hey folks, doing a raffle on patreon for all subscribers, gonna try and do these often :) Any tier participates.

www.patreon.com/pokebuns

Aside from raffles I do polls, so come check it out! Maybe I'll draw a comic or something.

Hey everyone. This journal will obviously be a bit different. I try to keep personal stuff out of the public eye of course, and only during my worst falls into depression did I decide to call it out, which was embarrassing and sad since so many folks related to my mood rather than tried to get me out of it. That in itself helped anyway though, because I knew those that related in that way cared, and needed just as much help as me. And I hope to all of you, that you're hanging in there, and won't give up.

That being said, not for my sake but for my mom, I'm opening up about it here to sort of.. step myself up and do everything I can bring her back from a scary time. My mom was diagnosed with a stage 4 tumor behind her nose in 2021. It's been a long and difficult battle since as you can imagine, she's so far survived after having chemo and radiation, she's been through a lot. Seeing this happen, a lot of you know what that's like, going through it yourself even. She's in her 60s, and while she's still here(and I do thank God for that), at this point she's struggling to keep her weight up. In fact she's below 100 pounds now and this is the most scared we've been throughout it all.

We're focusing on giving her more fatty things like Yogurt, dairy in general, but it'll be a constant struggle. Either way, I'm committed to helping her through it and bringing her back from a dangerous place. I'm not here asking for help financially, although that in itself could be its own journal, which to this day, despite telling me to talk about, I just can't for my own reasons. No, this is me opening up about what's going on in my life a bit, and the struggles I'm trying to process and I know I owe a couple of comms to some folks, I also work on CoA and try to update that, but it's all hard.

If anyone has been through this, whether personally suffered from Cancer or seen their family suffer from it, any advice on how to gain weight would be appreciated. I've of course been googling this and doing that kind of research but nothing beats first hand experience, although if its painful to talk about please don't worry about it.

and while I'm not here to talk about financial stuff I do have a patreon if anyone would like to support my work on CoA or art in general.

you're not makin money and you've got nothing else to do, you may as well take a look at older projects.

Now that I used my bday as an excuse to get your attention, please read this plug! :P

Heya, comms are open, and I got some YCH open too if you wanna check those out :)

Price:

Flat 60 for Artistic Freedom commissions

Normal comms: https://www.furaffinity.net/view/51487377/

YCH: https://www.furaffinity.net/view/52556575/

20% off my commission prices if your comm involves a bunny! :D
Hit me up!
Price sheet: https://www.furaffinity.net/view/51693128/

I consider myself a bit of a bunny enthusiast, and want to specialize in them in general.

Heya! I'm tryin to grow my twitch channel for fun! So I'm doing an art raffle for folks to help get some attention for it :)

SO! Since there's so few participants I'm gonna do 1 winner, good luck folks!

How to participate:
1. Required: Watch this account!
2. Required: Follow my Twitch Channel!
https://www.twitch.tv/blazeymix
https://www.twitch.tv/blazeymix
https://www.twitch.tv/blazeymix

Extra ticket: The usual! Post a journal linking this one! Spread the word :)

Deadline: 4/12/23 April 12th! I'll post the winners in a new journal that day :D

Extra details/rules: Make sure you link the journal and post a comment letting me know your Twitch name so I know you followed me! You're not actually required to come watch, but if you do, that'd be fun! Just to hang out and stuff. And yeah unfollowing after the raffle, unwatching.. obviously that's scummy so don't try it or you'll miss out on other raffles. :)

IF YOU DON'T HAVE TWITCH, you can still earn a ticket by plugging this journal with one of your own journals. :) So no worries!

Okay! See you there! Check out my recent submissions in my gallery to see the quality of the work you'll receive if you win. :D

heya! :) I recently became a twitch affiliate, which is pretty neat! I stream from time to time, doing raids or whatevs! Sometimes on voice. If you ever wanna support me but can't afford to check out the patreon or commission, you could always hang out there! I get revenue apparently! :D Come hang out sometime! <3

https://www.twitch.tv/blazeymix
https://www.twitch.tv/blazeymix
https://www.twitch.tv/blazeymix

Check it out here! Need to pay some bills!
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/50976360/

slots:
1. Taken on IB
2. Discord Comm
3.

We've been making these regularly, come check it out if you're bored!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4Zds7YI7YOs
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4Zds7YI7YOs
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4Zds7YI7YOs

Yo. I'm open for comms :)
Single Character pinup like this: https://www.furaffinity.net/view/47113913/
$80
Lines only w/ bonus free flats: $60

Few slots available. Note me if interest. <3

We got one. It's a thing. If you're bored or need something to listen to...
https://youtu.be/tAi-3O7jFeA
https://youtu.be/tAi-3O7jFeA
https://youtu.be/tAi-3O7jFeA

It's not about Sonic..... yet.