So yes this happening, this DOES NOT MEAN that I won't go toony still however the original inception of the char. was for a more realistic look. After some time and consideration and suiting for a while I've learned that the term "Cute" refers to the whole package actions and all so we are going to give this a go. I've also learned that though a full suit is great I plan to try and get out and do more community activities and in 90 degree heat I now understand how those easy bake ovens worked back when I was a kid as this is essentially what happens in a full suit. So midnight is going partial and also that char. in a suit looks sharp so yup that's happening.

I've reviewed a lot of suit makers and those I did contact I want to give a shout out to you'll for being very patient with me while I ask silly questions and the sorts. Understand what may be logical to most likely isn't to me so I figure the question that isn't asked will never get answered with a logical resolution. So this brings me to whom I've decided to go with and a really heart felt thank you for taking the commission even when closed, thank you FB suits (FarisBatwan) for taking this project on. I really do appreciate it and its in your paws to bring out the best of Midnight from here forward as we start this journey.

Beyond that looking forward to cruising the miracle mile this year and see what life brings me, its never about the destination its about the journey so lets start the engine and get rolling down the highway :) .

OMG, great time and exhausting...Thank you everyone for saying Hi and I will miss you all greatly. Oh sorry convention schedule this year (Subject to Change)

Megaplex in Florida
Orlando, FL August 4th - 6th, 2017

FurAffinity United in VA
Dulles, VA August 25th - 27th 2017

Furpocalypse in CT (pending)
Cromwell, Connecticut Oct 27-29, 2017

Give me a shout out if you see me, looking forward to next time till then keep it rocking and hope to see you soon!

I've started my job finally, something that I'd have to say is a good thing for more then just the money part of it. Its a rather odd thing to be up at 5 a.m. anymore as my brain is still trying to comprehend it all in truth about early mornings and having to be awake. I'm in the training phase of this all and as normal most training material is rather dry and boring so I'm powering through it as best as I can. Currently nothing on my schedule is too badly disturbed by the work schedule however that will change as they assign my normal working hours per say. Currently though it looks like I'll be on night shift which won't rock the apple cart too badly for things that run on Monday's.

I've had mention before that some are mystified as to why I always seem to have to figure in a higher cost for events, this however is a simple yet strikingly complex answer in truth. The budget in this house is a fluid one that is shared by 2 parties, there are no solid lines as to who has what or pays for what so in lieu of that statement anything that I look up or fund is always going to be for 2 people. Blossom lives with me and since its a co-operative shared budget I tend to try and save us both money on a usual basis as neither one of us has a lot of spare change laying around. I'm more then proud to say that I can help support the household, so if you wish to help rather then question why it is so please provide some advise as to where I can source things at a cheaper cost it helps the both of us greatly more then I can express.

Now that I've got some sort of income the next meet up here will be a Tea meet, yup that's right another tea time at Midnight's is happening here soon. I'm planning on having a main course after tea and even stopping by the British Pantry store to pick up some pastries for everyone to enjoy along with the tea. If you haven't guessed it already I enjoy cooking a lot, way more then I should but its a thing I do and I've always found it relaxing to do so and besides the results are edible so even better. I'll have to think of something else to reveal at the meet up again that's not announced, guess I could see how my cake making and decorating skills are these days as I've not done that in a long while.

September is looking like a busy month for me already, I think I've got only 2 weekends free less this one makes only 1 left before its go time again. I don't mind it much keeps my world busy and the time passes by rather quickly which is good. I know that the Ren Fare is coming up which both Blossom and I are looking forward to, I always loved wandering around and enjoying the sights and sounds of it all.

If your wondering what is the best way to get ahold of me, well that would be Telegram in truth as I check that a few times a day. I try to check FA at least once every other day or so which isn't bad all things considering my schedule and the so forth. Email is another way to get ahold of me if you have it however that's only checked in the morning when I wake up and before bed so likely answers will come during those times.

Well Sunday holds new promises (I haven't gone to bed yet so its not official) and will see how all that pans out. If nothing else can see the sun rise and a new day start again or might just sleep in and let it pass on by. I've not decided yet on that course of action.

Again know that each and every one in my life is precious and their friendship is even more so though I may not often express it. I guess sometimes we get lost in the volume of life and the pace at which it runs we forget to sit down and reflect on what is really important to us, I wouldn't trade my life for anything because I'm blessed in so many ways.

Good night everyone near and far, be true to yourself, family and friends alike. Hugs from an old Border-Aussie.

Sincerely,
Midnight

Howdy everyone,

So a lot has happened in the past few months, none to say the least its been a long haul to finally something more concrete then "We will call you and let you know" on the job front. I've found a job working in DC for the world bank doing IT work, its a distance to travel but within the salary range I was hoping for so that's good news. Today found out my start date of Monday which is really good news as the bank account can't take much more abuse then it already has.

I can't say its not been a good time of it, daily my job was finding a job which may seem counter productive to some but it gave me time to catch up with life and even help out others where I could. In this time I've had the opportunity to share with others my successes and failures, maybe helped guide them along in their pathway as well. The house is as it is and not worse for ware in truth over this, I have Blossom to thank for that in majority because without her kindness I don't think that it would have turned out the way it did (Clean and organized that is).

The Wing Meet up on Mondays is going strong and I thank each and every one that attends to make it a success, in the grand scheme of things I'm nothing more then the person who sets up the chess board allowing for others to play. A new turn about has come forth and we may be allowed to suit for Halloween, details are still being worked out with that but with JazzBerry's help I do believe there will be few issues encountered. I hope that the meet up continues long after this and the business sees a benefit in allows us the space to continue to meet up and share good times for many more to come.

I attended Fur Affinity United 2016 and what I can say is I've had a blast and miss each and every one that I had the pleasure of meeting. I was in suit for a lot of it and can say that Full Fursuit's are HOT!!!, by that I mean the surface of the sun may have offered a bit cooler environment. Of course it was my hair brain idea to stay in it for 5 hours without a break to the headless lounge so completely all my fault on that one. Either way had a great time interacting with a lot of people and if you didn't catch up to me my sincere apologies but I was bouncing from place to place as was needed, hopefully I didn't miss anyone and if I did big hugs and I'll catch up to you hopefully at Fur The' More 2017 I promise. I'll try and post pictures up here on FA but still trying to work that one out yet, at least I got the journal thing down pat I think.

Adventures yet to come I'm sure of it, one thing I can say is I've found more then just a community but I've found true friends and family. I can't say that everyone likes me as a person and I don't expect that to be the case as it should be but for those that call me a friend I thank you and offer big hugs in return for your kindness. I hope to meet new friends and old alike still to come, life is far too short to wonder what may be but there is enough time to grasp the now and smile with all the blessings that come of it.

I bid you'll a good nite and warm hugs to carry you on to dreams, be well everyone and wishing you the very best

Midnight

So,
Well this journal will be pretty short and sweet, to the point really.

Today I found out that I wasn't kept for the summer at my current job. Where as I should be more upset then I am currently I'm looking at it as a life lesson and moving forward. Yes I'll be a jobless person but as well all know how that turns out for working dogs I likely won't be for long. So what am I going to do you may ask...well Friday I'm sleeping in plain and simple there.

The weekend will likely be a little of this and that, may need to head out and clear my head for some time playing Disc Golf and being among nature. Yah its not easy for me at the moment and I'll be pushed to every single breaking point for emotions that I have, little do some know one of my greatest fears is loosing my job after the 2 year run I had last time. Lets say I know what dog food tastes like and I'm never going back there again, ever.

So, there it is short and simple of it, I've got until Thursday to move out all of my collective desk stuff and pack it away at home, say my goodbye's and walk out the door one last time Thursday after work.

If your wondering how to help me out some just drop me a message on chat or telegram, yes I may be a downer but I'll get better quickly.

Thanks,
Midnight

And top of the morning to everyone,

So as some may already know that I've started the week of final decisions, nothing good to go over at all at this moment. This is the week that the top brass reviews workflow and makes decisions about my employment accordingly. I'm keeping a chipper outlook however and realizing that what happens well happens at this time.

Now on to the main event of the day, today's topic is drama, with a few sprinkles of FA issues added in. Brought to you by life.inc where we decide your future.

Such a lovely topic is it not, drama. As some may know that I've come back in with a very stern opinion of being drama free. That doesn't mean that I'm going to go "No drama or leave me alone" on this however bring it to my doorstep and I'll have a few things to say about it. In reality when most pass through the phases of life then we should gain the social cognitive ability to handle issues without upsetting the apple cart as it may be. Personally I don't judge people on their issues in life and truthfully don't care what preferences in sexuality,religion or political preference that you may identify with, if I poke at that then I will tell you I'm attempting (abit a horrible attempt) to make some humor. For people to hold on to things so fiercely and retort with almost a violent reaction tells me there are issues there that they need to sort out on their own.
Brings me to another topic of interest, the past is the past..end of story. I'm not saying to forget the past as it did shape who you are currently but understand that life moves on and people change. If that person comes to you and genuinely apologizes then hear them out on it. I guess in my older years I've learned that the little things are just that and not worth spending much time on. Life is a constant sea of change and movement, the ebb and flow of it is battering and brutal even at the best of times.
I guess the life lesson boils down to this, I'll hear about your troubles and whats bothering you but I'm not going to get wrapped up in it. If you don't care for me then grow a set and say so, otherwise come up and speak with me and get to know me as a person.

On to FA stuff...
Ok so FA has dropped the ball, off a 100 foot cliff down to a volcano which..yah basically FA has screwed up bad this time. I understand that the system is marginally bad but here are some pro tips for everyone that is complaining.

*Invest stock in more then one place, yah there are other art communities out there.
*Get a personal website if your an artist doing commissions (watermark your public artwork).
*Keep back ups locally of art you've done or purchased so you can reload it, better yet keep a back up of your FA page locally if possible.
*Get the Email Address of your clients and communicate via Email not through FA.
*Don't post sensitive/personal/erotica stuff through notes unless you can spare it possibly getting out to the world.

I guess the rule of common sense applies here, yes FA is using old code to support a forum and yes they badly need to update it to the 21'st century. The admins have likely weighed this decision already many times and may even be thinking of doing this however given the content on FA that could have some serious down time requirements to complete. Basically my point is to have redundancy in your options and invest a bit of spare change in to a branded name if your selling your artwork and use FA and other sites as a pointer record to a website you own to minimize down time/impacts. Also keep in mind anything put on the internet is now public information so be mindful of what you send through notes and put on journals.

I don't really have anything to add beyond that, been trying to find free time and if I've attempted to spend time with you but it sort of fizzled out its nothing personal. With what has been going on I've had to make some adjustments in free time and prepare for my future of whatever it is. Basically speaking things should pan out here soon to a nice even keel.

What have I been up to.....

Well that's a loaded question now isn't it, but to expand on that a lot lately. Recently had the pleasure of attending 2 meets and I'll go over both of those. Before we begin however I will say that my life is in a shaker bottle at the moment with uncertainty looming around every corner. It is a known truth that what the future holds for me job wise is in flux, I am hoping to stay with my current position however that again is just hovering with "I don't know". Just like everyone if you catch me in a moment and I'm a bit non-responsive then its not you by any means its likely I'm in thought about moving forward in life and the tough roads ahead, I guess the road sigh of "Dangerous Curves Ahead" applies.

I've also had the pleasure of meeting a person that has changed my view drastically, this particular individual has medical issues that are very bad. Daily he deals with life and death decisions that I in my dizziest daydreams couldn't fathom handling myself. Aside from all that each time we meet he smiles and laughs, this particular individual lives life with his full body and soul which is humbling and amazing in a single moment. Yes I am very proud to call him a good friend of mine and in more then one way he has changed my outlook on life.

I will say that some folks may have remembered me from the past, maybe I've done a few wrong and disappearing on everyone was wrong. I do understand that the community is more then just a common interest its a family, we all develop close bonds with each other and leaving without saying a word has devastating results well beyond even my scope of understanding. I've come back with my head held low and tail tucked asking for forgiveness and most have, I've said what I've needed to say to a lot of people, I'm not asking for you to agree with what I did just an answer as to where I stand in your life.

My life in flux, and the whole ball of wax gets redone, what does this mean you say. Well once this is posted no going back but I'm putting it out there. I'm Single, yes that's right no mate, not looking at the moment (although open) and not really reciprocating any feelings beyond friendship. My past is spotted with odd occurrences that a best friend finds amusing to say the least. Simply put I can't keep a partner to save my life, yes all females if your wondering. Most left me in disgust at best and various other feelings, flip side of the coin is I've a lot of males that are highly interested in me. Paradox of it is that I get along with males better then females and understand them a lot better, I know one particular that would love to be with me in more then a friends status. Now here is the issue at hand is to sort through these felling that I have, I'd move heaven and earth itself for this one person that I've known for well on 11 years, they may not know that but its the truth. We meet at a get together at his place a long time ago, to say a friendship grew is an understatement, as time moved on we learned each other, the bond then was solidified. I had dropped out of the community without contact of him, this is shortly after the truth about feelings were told to me and no, that isn't the reason I left like I did however I can't help to think it had devastating consequences. Now I sit at a cross roads which is trying to find and rationalize these feelings, where do they sit in my life and should I go exploring. I really don't want to get hurt and I really don't wish to hurt someone else so it would have to be a safe place and one hell of an understanding on both sides.
Now the interesting part that has been observed by a lot of people, I get hit on a lot by males, I've tried to create a character in SIMS and my wife left me and I ended up with a guy, the only person I could romance successfully in Fallout 4 was the male companion...maybe I understand males better then females.

Ok, on to the main course as it were...

NoVA Bowling Meet

Was awesome, I want to thank Spazzy for letting me run around as Raz for a bit. To say that it was fun to be free from life's little judgements is an understatement. I will admit that its not an easy thing to be in a fursuit and I want to applaud every one that does it. It is not comfortable at all, to be frank its hot and takes a toll on you but the payment of people interacting is well worth it, besides the artwork is beautiful on all these custom created artwork pieces.
I'd say that I also got to interact with friends, I've started to mend a few broken relationships and made some new friends. Everyone that I meet I gave a hug to (sometimes 2) and it was wonderful, even got a few ninja hugs in return...Awesome. Hanging out with friends is amazing, I can't thank you all enough for wanting to spend time with this old mutt and can say that each one of these moments is a memory that makes life worth living and defines that singular difference between just living and living well. As a general side note Bowling in fursuit is insanely difficult, awesome job on everyone that tried it.

Kain's Meet

This again was another amazing meet, I got to hang out with friends and even meet up with a few of the old crew back from 2007. I cooked as well for this one, an amazing pasta and meat sauce which went over well from what I could gather, there was also Chili and Taco's later in the evening. Thank you all who participated and also helped with this as the food was great and I must tip my hat to the chief's of the evening. I hung out and talked with a lot of people, being with friends is an awesome experience but it makes the time pass so quickly, eventually Blossom and I had to head back home to walk the dogs, thank you Max for giving us a lift and also making a new friend that night. I got back to a party winding down and played Cards Against Humanity for a bit which again was a blast. Talked with a few people here and there and then left the party at around 4, had a long conversation with Pherik that for lack of better terms flipped the table of my life and we had Denny's for early morning breakfast. After this there was little to be said but good nite world, I went to bed very content with how the party went and what my future holds. Thank you all that came, I do count the days until we can hang out again and just enjoy having a good time.

(Disclaimer-there was more that went on however I won't post that without asking the person first if I can)

That's pretty much it, yes a long entry this time around but had I been sticking to my once a week updates like I should have it wouldn't be this long...but I'm glad it is in some ways.

Happy Tuesday everyone,

So, well yah a lot of things are in the works, closer and closer inches the final decision about if I'll have work through the summer. This isn't all bad actually but its not good, I figured in a descent amount of money to survive the time that I'd not be working although in reality I'm seriously pondering why it is kids have off for 3 months out of a year I'm obviously for year around school means I get to keep a paycheck year around. Neither here or there I suppose but that's mostly the driving force for me.

I've caught up with a few people at Fur The "More" and oddly enough a lot have changed for the better, I also ran in to some that can't overlook the past and move on to the future. If nothing else I'm comfortable in who I am and really don't seek validation from others to survive, I surely don't need to run my inner personal demons past others. I guess it was one that did set me off a bit this week, after having a few moments to wonder why it touched a nerve with me I'd say because this is one person that for lack of better purposes should have told me up front what the reality of what they thought of me. I not going to dwell on it in truth the past is just that, the past and if they wish to move on then my door is open.

Moving forward with that I don't know what the future holds for me, in short I may be going in to conservation mode for resources here soon. It likely won't impact much from the outside looking in but there will be changes, so if I'm being a mopey pup then its just life swinging the hammer away again at me. I tend to recover quickly so ya no big deal there, I've always found a way to make a go of it.

This week is the Tea meet that I'll be hosting, yes I'm excited for it and I'm honored by those that are coming to it. Make no mistake this may be the last one for a while but rest assured it isn't the Final One, I plan to continue this as long as I've a roof to do so either rented, leased, owned or even borrowed. Basically its not the last go for this so lets make plans for it now to continue. On to my next quest is finding art's for the Coffee/Tea mug, I was thinking of my fursona "Border-Aussie" with a monocle and top hat holding a tea cup sipping maybe it or not. Either way would look neat, it has to be line art or at best grayscale, it would seem additional colors cost a boat ton extra when it comes to printing.

Beyond that I have nothing really to add, life is going well thus far and I'm still slightly treading water only going under ever now and then. I figure every day I can put my feet on the ground is a good day no matter what happens through the course of it in truth. I'm blessed to be back in the community among friends, hugs everyone.

Sincerely,
Midnight the Border-Aussie

Good morning,

So I've been chasing my tail again, busy...that was a stop a while back ago. Good news getting fursuit done so can modify that header. I know a lot of have offered and from the bottom of my heart I thank each and every one who replied to my questions. I won't forget that you did and I appreciate it more then you know, GeekPaw was open for commissions and has a Border-Aussie so I decided to go with them, I do like the artwork as well so its a great fit (Thank you Janis for the recommendation). Now its a waiting game which I don't mind at all, I've still got some things to do so if you can help with the following item I'd be more then grateful.

I need a DTD done, I haven't a clue how to start or where to start. The few stories I've heard were not good and been told "If you mess it up then it can cause issues with your suit". So I wouldn't mind any help at all, I don't have a lot but I will offer dinner to those that come on over. I can cook really well is one thing I can do, and I have crash space if your traveling a distance.

As for the remainder of life its been a crazy roller coaster of fun, I've been balancing worlds and then some at this point. Still have a lot to do before I can take a breather. So yah PCD hasn't even crossed my mind yet, I know I miss everyone at Fur The "More" and I did have a great time. On a good note FA United is coming up soon, I'm not sure how many will attend but I'll be there none the less. Is it silly to pay money to hang out with friends, well in a sense yes but then again not really as I get to meet new people I don't know. As I like to say "A friend is just someone you haven't said Hi to yet" (its a dog thing I suppose).

I'm learning the ropes again and enjoying life, in a lot of ways I'm overly joyed to have shed my past and start anew again. I sense a lot of adventures, some curves and winding turns ahead with surprises at every bend but this is the way memories are made.

Till we meet again,
Sincerely,
Midnight

Good morning,

Its a Tuesday, that means one more day down til the end of the week so good there. Been thinking that I haven't suffered post con depression yet and still yet to see if I have any sort of con plague. Yay the surprises in life are fun, really hoping that my immune system didn't get totally wrecked over the weekend.

So on my quest to find an artist marches on, I've been through a lot of sites and a lot of reference pictures. I haven't learned a lot other then each person stylizes the build as they see it and there are different qualities of Faux Fur out there. I've finally created a Flickr account for Joey's reference pictures, I'm up to 15 so far and have a few more to put up there.
I've resorted to going Toony style for the suit, in my mind Toony means mis proportioned eyes and the such but I've found that isn't always true. Again I'll be leaving it up to the artist's choice on this one, I'm not really going for super photo realistic here but close enough that it matches would be nice (The artist that did my char. badge did an amazing job at achieving that actually). Anyways If you happen across my page and happen to read my journal updates and you know a guy, or a guy who knows a guy then recommend him or her my way.

I'm also helping out a friend, we both are getting full suits so the agreement is going to be a combined interest, yup 2 commissions at one go. It actually is helpful to have his input as he points out stuff that I'd miss and visa versa. I've been working on that but both of us need reference sheets done which is in the workings at the moment, the many things to get done prior to the green flag dropping is staggering at the best.

Beyond that nothing much going on, I'm on a learning process at this moment trying to be me. It is def. not a bad thing that I've dropped the wolf out because in truth I want to be that goofy, happy and dedicated to friends pup that is a Border-Aussie. I'm still uber busy however as the tide has not calmed down in a while, its not bad just everyday life as usual.

And back off to make some spare change, seems like I work for pennies these days with the bills I have, but I'm happy and content so that has to count for something.

Sincerely from your tail chasing, fun loving and frantic Border-Aussie,
Midnight

Good Morning to everyone,

Ok so here it is, a breakdown of the weekend.

Friday was great, got to meet up with a few of the furs that I know. A big hug to everyone that ran in to me and I really hope that you'll enjoyed the company as much as I did. The fox that I was with seemed to have a great time, he is a bit reserved and quiet anyways so hard to tell. Got my badge commission put in and paid for. Yes I was tail-less throughout this one but given I couldn't really find any of my costume tails no surprise there (besides I'm not a wolf any longer so none would have fit anyways). Missed the dance for a game of Cards Against humanity, none to say the least it was a great time. Met up with a good friend from VA, we stayed up until the early morning talking and watching cartoons from the old days (Some of you'll weren't even born when these were aired). We were offed a room to stay in at the convention but in the interest of saving money for other projects (fursuit) it just wasn't economically feasible to spend that much currently. We also got to go to a room party, I want to thank all those that invited me and the fox along for that..It was amazingly fun.

Saturday

Got up late, very late in the day. My mom wanted to go to the convention as well so wasn't an issue there. I had a pack following me around so we did what furries do best...Socialize. Got to check up on a few things and saw the fursuit parade as well. Smash Burger is awesome food stuff, got to hang out there for a bit while eating awesome food and talking to a few friends. Mom seemed to have a good time but it was time to go back home and drop her off. There wasn't much going on until later in the day so we chilled out for a few hours at the house. Got back to make the concert, that was amazing as well (no need to sit in the concert as it was easily loud enough to be herd on the first 2 floors of the hotel). We played Cards Against Humanity again with new and old friends alike, it was amazing. The dance spun up and people retreated to room parties as happens on Saturday. We stayed around for a bit taking in the scene and just relaxing, none to say the least it was needed. Again a late night of good times to be had.Also decided to pull out "Duke" the Border Collie puppet I have. That was good times as a lot of people interacted with him and even a few thought he was a "Real Dog" which is an awesome compliment.

Sunday

Got in dragging our tails, only 3 hours of sleep so caffeine was my friend. Made the NovaFurs meetup at the convention, got to reconnect with a lot of people in the area again. Yay got to see my char. badge that was commissioned as well. Was working with the artist who to say the least did an amazing job on it (understatement, its awesome artwork). Meet up with a few friends as well and pretty much wandered out and about. Missed the dance competition, lots of dub-step and 3 hours of sleep doesn't really work for a migraine. Said my goodbyes to new and old friends alike, just know that I will miss you'll greatly if I didn't express that already at the convention. Stayed until the end ceremonies and wandered home after that, all in all it was amazing and I can't wait to go back.

That's my weekend in a short, I'm exhausted and barely able to function but it was bar none the most amazing time I could have hoped for. New friends and old were made, new experiences to last a lifetime and I do thank each and every one who made that happen. I do hope to meet outside of the convention as I tried to get contact information from everyone, if i didn't ask my deepest apologies, please do leave me a note with that info and I'll add it straight away to my phone.

For those that knew me as Midnight Wolf (The black wolf) back then I was off the rails, irresponsible and was not the kind of person you would openly admit to knowing. Please do know that I'm deeply sorry if I had offended you in the past however I've changed a lot since then. I've apologized to those I could and I did mean what was said to each and every one. I ask that you give this Border Aussie a chance and I'll prove beyond a doubt that I've changed for the better. I also ask that if you wish to know who I am the stories of the past are just that, the past. I've since put to rest the wild side wolf that I was so please do come and speak with me about it.

Again thank you all to everyone New and Old friends alike, you've made memories that this old Border Aussie will not soon forget for a lifetime.

Yay,

Midnight

Its finally here, besides Friday,

"I'll make a wish for you
And hope it will come true
That life would just be kind
To such a gentle mind
If you lose your way
Think back on yesterday"

I know its rare but I've a friend who has been there though thick and thin for me. He has never let me down, he always knows when to support me and when to let me learn on my own. I can't say that I've treated him all that well through the times and I may even have been a complete..well yah. The truth is I'm thankful for his support even though I may not seem it.

Next topic is I hope to reunite with folks at the convention but who ever took the time to call me, email me..or even come knocking on the door (yah, I'm talking about those of you who know where I live). I can't say that I don't deserve that one, i did disappear for 9 years from the grid and for that I'm really sorry that it happened. I can only hope that I'll find the family that I once had before but don't expect me not to be guarded. When its over I can only hope they remember me this way, and reach out a paw every now and then. I want to run free and wild, be that person that is careless and free, and this time I'll make sure the course is one that avoids heartbreaks and the such.

Today I found out my Mom is going to the convention as well, I'm actually going to enjoy the company even though it may not be constantly but it will awesome that I've such a supportive family member in this all. I'm sure other members of my family would also support me but that's going to be a slow process with most.

As for the transition to a Border Aussie " Its a new day, its a new plan, I've been waiting for you, here I am" as I accept this change with open arms er paws..yah. I guess in some ways I'll miss the wolf side but in a lot of ways I won't, besides Joey my IRL dog is a Border Aussie and we have a lot in common to include the hard headed trait.

Well I've taken to benadryl so sleepy time Midnight has happened, hope to see you'll there.

Sleep smiles,
Midnight

Happy Thursday,

So, my day is almost half over, I'm looking at the clock and realizing that tomorrow this time I'll be getting ready to head out in a car to Fur The "More". I'm happy actually looking at the events of the past that I've decided to move forward on to a new image, its sad that the old one passed on but in some ways its good as well. I still like the name Midnight so that won't change and ties it all in almost full circle.

Ok so the Playlist is done, bag needs to be packed, the meds need to be packed and who doesn't travel with a first aid kit. I've got necessary stuff for everything possible that could maybe happen in the scope of me being to do anything about it, law of averages says that something will happen that I'm not prepared for..which I'm prepared for that as well..lol

I'll be meeting up with the two local groups in the area, maybe some will remember me from those groups maybe they wont. I'm not really too overly concerned about it as I'll be meeting with old friends and making new ones.

The schedule is brutal I've put together, maybe I should learn to go by the "Ending" time and not the beginning. The worse case is "I like to move it, move it..you like to" had to bust out in song for that one. I'll reschedule or shift things around some, being slightly late or leaving early by a small amount won't be too bad, nothing overlaps that badly anyways.

So, I guess being the border aussie I am with a happy tail wag and a smile I'm back off to work again to make the few dollars and cents needed. I'll see ya there

Sincerely,
Midnight

Good Wednesday,

So I've had a song stuck in my head all day today...and being a DJ (not for hire, ask for details if your really curious) I communicate through music a lot.

"Don't wait for an Invitation, No need for reservation, This life is an Exploration, And you gotta see what I see in you"

This is all me, I've waited for a personal invite for a long while and realized that its not going to come, there is no need for a reservation just come and be who you are. Can't disagree that its an exploration not only in your self but in being yourself. I'd say that it is an exploration not only in to yourself but others as well, its a journey in to freedom of ones self. I know that I look beyond the wall that people put up and beyond the surface details in to who they are, I can only hope that I see what others see in me.

"There's a key that opens a door, Will you find it and turn it?, Take your time,don't take too long, There's a map washed ashore, will you find it and burn it"

I guess we all have this "Key" in to self exploration, not furry specific but are those shown it willing to take a chance and turn that key. Of course we all can ponder on the ramifications of our actions but if we wait too long then the opportunity will pass us up. The last part is that once you've started this journey are you willing to take that safety map and destroy any pathway back to the old you.

"Unleash your imagination, Two stars, one constellation, bright lights just to guide the way, can you see what i see in you?"

This one applies well here to unleash your imagination, I guess as we get older the wonderment in the world is replaced by facts and figures, movies and video games the imagination is lost. In the community that is reignited and lost in a world of wonderment. The remainder is I think the pull of the community, its not hard to find it once you have been introduced. I hope to see what others see in me in this journey, maybe they will reference the past and that is fine, new and old friends welcome alike.

And again the song is by Capital Cities and is called One Minute More

Only one more day and 4 hours, here come the feeling to run there again and being slightly close its hard not to do that. I'll behave and keep focused on my job, or try to..lol

TC
Midnight

Yay!!! its Wednesday,

So, I am thinking about this, and I've come to a conclusion that the past is just that...the past. The wolf side of me had a great run but in truth it is time to explore a lot more. I guess in some ways being solid, plain and not much coloration reflected my nature then but as it would happen I've taken a long, hard look in to what has happened.

Its not often times that the answer falls in to someones lap, or in my case flops in to my lap. I've come to realize that my dog Joey is everything I want to be. He is loyal beyond any comprehension of reason, goofy when he needs to be, sometimes shy but usually a people person that will stop at nothing to make me smile. He has determination and the drive that just won't quit (ever..even at 2 a.m.). He is uniquely colored in a way that even I couldn't imagine and def. is the odd ball on that one. Oh, and he his hard headed as well listing only when he needs to, to say he marches to a different beat is an understatement.

So why this, OMG is Midnight dead...well technically no, Midnight as the fursona is still alive and kicking its just I'm moving forward from that single color wolf on to something that is, well me. It's been 9 years since my last interaction with the furry community, its been a long while since the wolf padded around and its time for a change. I guess all good things as they say come to an end but in truth that part of my life is so scarred and tattered by a few individuals to put him back together would be a vast amount of TLC and glue. In this I bid the Wolf side of me a fare well, its been a good run but its time to be Reborn.

In to what, well a Border Aussie of course, yah I'm going to domestic canine so my woven brothers you've not lost a pack member I'm just..well I enjoy a dog bowl and a roof over my head on regular occasions. Since he is a RL dog it was easy to get pictures of him, er well when he isn't trying to run away from the camera or eat it. I'll likely have a fursuit made in his pattern and coloration. Less not forget my Corgi named Jasmin though, I think I'll use her mahogany eye coloration as she does have some of the most luminescent eyes I've seen on a dog yet.

On a better note there is now only 1 more day and 4 hours until I'm on my way to Fur The "More". I know a lot of the people coming and I wouldn't blame them if they don't remember me though. I guess time will tell either way I'm walking in a new pup, yay me.

So If your wandering about feel free to drop by and say Hi to Midnight.

Good morning for those on the Eastern Time Zone...
So I stayed up way too late last night, digging through pictures of AC 07'until 1 in the morning. In my moment of clarity I've realized that something was missing. Its a feeling that you had burred deep down inside but didn't know why. So a little more detail, I suspect by now you'd wonder why I was gone so long.

Please sit and let me offer you some tea if you like, I enjoy mine with 2 lumps of sugar and some milk.

A long time ago I was very active in the community, it was a time of transition for me as the world seemed right still. I met a lot of other furries and rarely was home, then I meet up with my first Ex mate in the community. Slowly I got pulled away from my friends for time spent at home watching movies and doing not much but sitting around. My personality began to shift and fracture, the happy go lucky person was being lost in the wind. Some could argue this is the death of Midnight but I'm here to tell you without question it was. Slowly less of Midnight was there and more of a miserable being replaced him. By the end the damage was done and yet again my ex left me for someone else. I attempted to rebuild Midnight back from this, a few scars remained not visible but there. Enter on the stage of life Ex number 2, she was better then the first but still, oye. I'd lost my job somewhere in this and with that stress and pressure combined with the usual fights this caused a divide. we parted ways as friends and that was that, what wasn't known is Midnight also parted ways that day. I'd lost everything in a single moment in my life, everything I was and hoped to be gone faster then I realized. I at this time determined 2 things...I needed to get my life back in order and all Women are BAT (censored) INSANE, or at least the ones that I picked anyways.

I've attempted to reconnect with the community a few times, I guess few want an old mangy wolf around. With the help of a friend who for most part has a "no give up" attitude has set forth a goal to get me out of the shadows. Well look out world I'm clean and all brushed up ready to step back in, so some may not like me and maybe even a few may shun me but that is the way it is. I can't help those that hold my past against me, yes I've disappeared without explanation and for that I apologize but in reality there are reasons for this. I figured you would want to know the story of Midnight and how I'm returning (more so why here).

Ok, so I'm feeling excited, I remember this excited feeling just before AC 07'. As I told a friend last night "It feels a lot like it did before" which is a good thing. I really can't tell you how much it will impact me this go around, last time I went in timid and shy and left crying wishing it would never end so we will see. I invite you say "Hi" if you see me wandering around Fur The "More", I'd love to meet up with new folks and reunite with old friends.

Yah, Have to get back to work, it pays the bills and really isn't that bad oddly enough so, well C'ya there hopefully.

Yay,
Well your here, prob. curious or even maybe directed here, welcome.

Ok, so what's going on in a day in my life..well here it is.

I'm going to Fur the "More" this weekend, all fun and games but still getting in the "Frame of mind" is whats going on currently. Its nothing I haven't done previously but there is still that keeping an even keel at work kind of thing and not focusing on...OMG why is time passing so slowly, hurry up already.

I've been in the community a long time, I've been a handler for about 5 years and in to puppetry for around 8'ish. Fast forward from my small absence and brings us to today, after a long drawn out discussion with my best friend, another non-furry friend and my mom it is time to get get a suit of my char.

Why, oh why now you may ask, well because I'm in a position to dedicate more of my time to giving back to the community and I've a few pennies free. Am I rolling in the dollars, nope...In fact I'll be lucky to make ends meet while attempting to pay off a costume but, ya know its worth it in the end.

So, as the week passes this feeling will creep in again..that need to go and run wild will hit. I'll likely claw at the walls until my nails bleed but that is the unmistakable unity that is once again pulling me in, just like the gravitational flux of a black hole I can't escape this one.

Some wonder what it is that drives me to the community, I'd be remiss to mention what doesn't in truth, yes were a bit guarded around people but in truth people fear what they don't understand, this is a human and understandable reaction that..well is human. I've always been welcomed with open arms, or paws if you may by everyone I've meet, and the friendships made in the community stem from the heart and not from the head. I'm proud to be a furry, I'm proud to be a wolf, Midnight the Black Wolf if you may.

If your going to Fur The "More" then feel free to say Hi.