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So you really do hate me that much
Posted 13 years agoKay
I get it, wont bother you ever again then..I JUST
Posted 13 years agofjiua sometimes wish I wouldn't be me..
.. Okay I'm sorry I just..
need to pour all this out to somewhere, no one of my friends want to listen me whine about this
and neither do you but YOU DONT HAVE TO READ THIS ANYWAYS LOL
XD;;
Is there anything I wouldn't stress about anymore..
2+ years ago I promised everyone I wouldn't come to this,
BUT LOOKS WHO'S HERE NOW
CRAWLING IN HER OWN ANXIETY
Seriously I swore I wouldn't think about loooove until I'm 18 or over
Here I am 16 right now (this started at 15)
And I honestly can't even watch disney movies anymore
Or watch any other cutie movies :--D
They make me feel like throwing the TV out of the window and fast
Alllll my friends around me
Like pretty much all
Just make me feel even more worse by just, hyping out how wonderful their hunbuns are
THANK YOU FOR RUBBING IT IN MY FACE
THAT'S WHAT I ALWAYS WANTED
That's also sad because they won't spend anymore time with me, because they got someone better to spend the day with 8-D
And I knooow I knooww I'm still so young to think about this
But what are you gonna do.. My paranoia isn't helping this situation anyways
I just start to think immediately that there is totally everything, _everything_ wrong with me and god I suck boohoo
Then I start to do everything to change the bads of mine
Like foooood and such..
And it won't help either since losing weight like this, makes my friends feel bad
SO NOBODYS EVER HAPPY
HI SAD WORLD
YOU LOOK VERY SAD TODAY
F*ck all
I'LL GO BACK TO TENERIFE
:CIs it normal
Posted 13 years agoTo be paranoid about pretty much everything..
I mean if someone is looking at me I instantly start to think somethings wrong with me or such
Or they're going to do me something
Like kidnap or else
Everything I hear (or see), I think it's something about me
If people don't talk to me , or take long to answer I think somethings wrong with me
If I hear that's something wrong I think it's also my fault
If someones mad I think it's my fault
If I feel sick, I instantly think I have something very wrong in my body
If I have even a slightest headache I think I have a migraine or something worse
If i eat any food I instantly think I will get really fat, even tho I know I won't
And many many many other situations but my hands are cold so I can't type much lol;;
So in a nutshell, I think everythings my fault or has something to do with me or somethings wrong with me and etc..
:::IIII This ain't cool. It just raises my stress even more and it is so not cool..
As if I didn't stress and over think about everything already enough..
I'll end up like my mom...That's it
Posted 13 years agoI'm gonna buy myself a army of birds
and live with them
happily ever after
I don't need anyone else
Especially anyone human being
:CAMAZINGLY AMAZING ARTIST IN DESPERATE NEED
Posted 13 years agoIncase you haven't still heard this, good thing if you have and even better if you have helped because please do ; n;
She is seriously amazing artist, her art is adorable as ever
Also she is in a horrible situation and really really needs help
READ THIS JOURNAL TO KNOW WHAT'S THE DEAL
Do it, even if just spreading the word if you're on a tight situation yourself too :C
I hate seeing amazing people suffering like that so DOO IITT
Please?
; u;
So Im back
Posted 13 years agoAnd it's 2.14am
Guess who should be sleeping but isn't tired at all since slept in plane and car
HURRDURR
FUCK THE POLICE
:I
...
I'll just go back
Isn't it sad when the airplane had landed back to here
Everything felt awful again
My upsetness and depression waited for me at the airstation
HOW NICE
I JUST DIDNT MISS YOU AT ALL MY EMO SIDE
GO AWAY
GO TO SOMEWHERE WHERE YOU ARE NEEDED
WHICH MEANS NOWHERE
SHUSH
fisdoghfg
no I'm not tired shut up XD
honestly 4 hours and I should be going back to school
For reals can you just imagine how eager I am
Jumping out of joy to get in middle of the stress and anxiousness
Hoorrraaay
besides I'd have to be another week there without shoootingstar
BECAUSE THAT BISH WENT TO LAPLAND FOR A WEEK :C
IHUAXUYUSOMEAN
And fuck sleep
fuck school
fuck feelings
fuck trying to catch up with things
fuck tumblr
fuck pokemon BW 2
fuck pretty much everything
okay end of the useless journal of just needing to tell you guys how awful it is to be back
aint it nice C:
Makes you all feel so loved inorite? LOLLast day
Posted 13 years agoOut here..
SOBSOB
Couldnt be more sad mood lol XD
I DONT WANNA COME BACK TO DA CRAPPY FINLAND
It sucks :C
I'll take this warmness and awesome people with me from here to finland
LETS CHANGE
FINLAND NEEDS CHEERING UP ANYWAYS LOL
Oh Tenerife
Oh South warmness
Oh everythin here
going to miss you ; nnnn;Hey, hey guys (CHARACTERS/ADOPTS)
Posted 13 years agoUnf I noticed I've designed a shitloads of designs during this vacation
And I surely wont be keeping them all
So I'd give you heads up that if you want some of them
Will be selling them when I get back
Tho if you want me to reserve one or multiple for you I can do that (no you dont need to pay me yet)
Please state then clearly if you want me to reserve* any for you ; u;
*= I'll be showing it/them to you before anyone else incase you'd like to buy it, so you dont have to play the first come first serve missing game XD
I've designed;
AVIANS
- Red ara twins (both Females)
- Blue Ara M
- American Eagle M
- American Eagle F
- Osprey F (not sure if keeping myself LOL;;)
- Secretary burd F
- Hybrids (twin tiger + eagle hybrids reserved for almond)
- Flamingo + swan hybrid F (not sure if keeping myself too ;;)
- Swan + american eagle M
- Pidgeon + owl Gender not sure lol
BIG CATS
- white tiger F reserved for acorn
- white tiger M
- white tiger = black panther M
- normal tiger mixed with red panda reserved for almond
- White lions (2 Males and 1 F) reserved for snuffiewuffz
- Black panther + king cobra F reserved for :linkalmond
- King cheetah M & F reserved for snuffiewuffz
REPTILES
- Green striped ''desert lizard'' F (not sure if keeping myself too lol)
- Cobra F
- green boa F
- This wierdo reptile with huuge tail (gold and white and black) M
- Plant snake/lizards idklol F & M
- Random feathered lizard M
- Random lizard F (white, brown & gold)
- Rattler + green Boa F
And other hybrids and such but my time is running out again so that'll be it
I'll probably come on to check if theres interests lol
Also if you have any design requests/ideas/something
do tell me and I'll try to make you :D
If nobody wants I'll just go on and give them to my broskis or just ditch them to the depths of my sketchbook llol;;UNfff
Posted 13 years ago IM SO NOT COMING BACK TO FINLAND
FUQ U ALL
:C
Tenerife is so much better place
Warmer
More awesome and kind people
fuck all you finnish grumpy asses LOL
I'm turning into a spanish XD
Everything seems to much more fun around here
Besides all these shops and fjisdopfjioasas
I'm serious whyyy finland whyyy :C
Okay I got 3 minutes left to be here writing this stupid journal of whining..
THO I MISS YOU MY BROHAMS :C
Miss talking to youuuu hurrdurr
I had about 250 euros when we came here
3rd day is sort of getting to and end and I have 40e left
YAAY
okay bai..lol;;;3 days
Posted 13 years agoand counting
without any food
been living with water and juice
...
okay lol this was just to push earlier journal down..
but couldn't think of anything else
:--D$2 sketches
Posted 13 years agoTaking 3 more because I'm a herping idiot lol;;
They'll look something like these
http://piirtolaudat.kupoli.net/oeka.....vat/138105.png
http://www.furaffinity.net/view/6604325/
http://www.furaffinity.net/view/6467242/
Just 3 :U
Comment with ref
THEY WILL ALL BE FINISHED TOMORROW
pp is laku__vankka[at]hotmail.com , yes with 2 _'s
or if sketches don't get to you
Go check adoptables at 
or resales here
Sunday
Posted 13 years agoWhy can't you come faster..
I want to get away from all this shit already :I
Only good thing about my birthday this year, getting to Tenerife for a week
Away from all this fucking crap
Also got a migraine today at school
about at 9am, during the class, I just lost my sight almost completely
Couldn't see much anything, and after half an hour it was gone
but then the most horrible of all headaches came and I just couldn't help but cry at the pain in my head
itwasalsogoodexcusetocryalloftheotherpainsandsaddnessoutlol
So our teacher sent me home (well I went to grandmas house since didn't want to come home), and shoootingstar came to walk me there to secure my way
Incase I would've fainted on my way
So I got a pain killer from my grandma, and stayed there.
shoootingstar also stayed there for a while, but left back to school after a while
Then I just fell asleep for almost 2 hours
I kind of wish the migraine would start tomorrow again..
I'd rather stay at home..
Don't really feel like going to school tomorrow at all
Too much stress and thoughts overflowing
.. kthxbai
brb, going to slit my wrists wide openHurricane fluttershy
Posted 13 years agoThere's couple of things I did lol about
first of all
WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY FANSERVICE OF RDXFLUTTERSHY
Noo not at all lol XD
second when they were making the tornado again..
Why didn't spitfire fly..
I mean, she's wonderbolt and probably one of the most powerful pegasos' of all besides RD
So why didn't she fly lol
Third..
BON BON WHAT WERE YOU DOING THERE
Where did you get wings out of all sudden lol
(I know she's background filler pony but still)
Okay end of this useless lol ponay journal XD
What is appetite
Posted 13 years agoNever heard of it
..
Seriously food disgusts me
And I'm worried
Might feel hungry
But when I see food:
Not hungry at all anymore
:I
Starving myself to death
doing the favor to the world lolDid it
Posted 13 years agoWhat i have always highly despited..
And now massive amount of regretsCHARACTER RESALE - Still lot's left
Posted 13 years agoStill left :B
PRICES ARE ALSO NEGOTIABLE
Saving up money for our Tenerife trip
Flurrf by kingofdunces - $2
PinkBlack Bunny by chevi - $5
FuuRabbit by myra - $4
Deer by kingofdunces - $5 + Extra sketch
Cowl by bisikiz - $2
Hooved thing $2 by chewdew
Spring $5 by kingofdunces
Native Canine $4 by masangai
More to come probably lol;;;
fjhiodsjgigsd I'm so not willing to let go of any of these
CHARACTER RESALE - UPDATED FOR EVEN MORE
Posted 13 years agoStill left :B
Saving up money for our Tenerife trip
Flurrf by kingofdunces - $2
PinkBlack Bunny by chevi - $5 - ON HOLD
FuuRabbit by myra - $4 - ON HOLD
Deer by kingofdunces - $5 + Extra sketch
Cowl by bisikiz - $2
Hooved thing $2 by chewdew
Princess $3 by pitterpatter - PENDING
Spring $5 by kingofdunces
Native Canine $4 by masangai
Hooved thing 2 $1 by chunnie
More to come probably lol;;;
fjhiodsjgigsd I'm so not willing to let go of any of these
CHARACTER RESALE - UPDATED FOR MORE
Posted 13 years agoStill left :B
Posting here cause I'm lazy to log into miikku and besides I have more watchers here LOL
Saving up money for our Tenerife trip
Flurrf by kingofdunces - $2
PinkBlack Bunny by chevi - $5 ON HOLD
FuuRabbit by myra - $4 ON HOLD
Deer by kingofdunces - $5 + Extra sketch
Cowl by bisikiz - $3
Hooved thing $2 by chewdew
Princess $3 by pitterpatter
More to come probably lol;;;
fjhiodsjgigsd I'm so not willing to let go of any of these
ASK MY CHARACTERS
Posted 13 years agoOkay I made it too.. /SOBSOB
Not that you probably have anything to ask at me or my characters but..
INCASE YOU HAVE 8D
COME AT ME BRO
My body's ready :UFor once
Posted 13 years agoI wish I didn't have to cry myself to sleep :I
And now even that isn't working..
God I'm so pathetic OTLI guess
Posted 13 years agoI guess I'll never be good enough :I
lol don't mind me, just sobbing over stupid things
/emocornerLonely characters
Posted 13 years agoOkay I blame chewdew for this right now :B
We just started pairing more of our characters out of all sudden,
AND JUST THOUGHT
IF ANYONE ELSE WOULD WANT TO PAIR SOME MORE CHARACTERS WITH MINE lol?
Since there's still some characters of mine looking for mate ; oo;
Here's the ones I'd really love to pair:
Aura On the right
Lyric
Ki
Larus On the left
Malta
Sadene Last one, ''Life''
Meredy
Ziska
Erasmus (yes she's a girl lol)
Chipo
Twinkle First one (she's also a girl)
There's some now, there would be more but I'm too lazy to link them all atm lol D:I wanna play Amnesia
Posted 13 years agoAnd then again no
I would probably shiver curled in my blanket for the rest of my life
Hnngg
BUT THE URGE GOSH
All my blames on Chibicon for reminding me of Rauski and made me watch his videos all over again
Not helping that my brother found me a version that works on mac
/useless journal all the wayURGENT CHARACTER RESALE - Updated
Posted 13 years agoPosting here cause I'm lazy to log into miikku and besides I have more watchers here LOL
Saving up money for our Tenerife trip
Flurrf by kingofdunces - $3
PinkBlack Bunny by chevi - $5
FuuRabbit by myra - $4
FuuRabbit 2 by myra - $4
Deer by kingofdunces - $5 + Extra sketch
Caution by kingofdunces - $6
Fox thing by me - $10
Alabastor by iflops - $3
Cowl by bisikiz - $3
fjhiodsjgigsd I'm so not willing to let go of any of these
But I have to for the sake of not loving them and I do need money for the Tenerife tripURGENT CHARACTER RESALE
Posted 13 years agoPosting here cause I'm lazy to log into miikku and besides I have more watchers here LOL
Flurrf by kingofdunces - $3
PinkBlack Bunny by chevi - $5
FuuRabbit by myra - $4
Deer by kingofdunces - $5 + Extra sketch
fjhiodsjgigsd I'm so not willing to let go of any of these
But I have to for the sake of not loving them and I do need money for the Tenerife trip
