Great Raffle, look here to sign up for a chance!

https://www.furaffinity.net/view/62455932/

I know I don't make many journals on here, and it's my fault for that. Theres so many good folks on here, and I want to celebrate them, not have any bumps in the road on my and my husbands journey distract from the great people on this site.

But readers digest, we've been having... problems since November.

My beloved husband, , starting having medical problems after a medically necessary surgery in october.

Then They got ER level sepsis.
Then a second surgery.
Then a blood clot.
Then a PICC line with me giving them twice daily antibiotics and blood thinners.
Then A hematoma, which required me to learn triage and trauma first aid skills at about 2 am before taking them to the ER.

And then come march, with our savings tapped out because of all the previous medical insanity, we found out that their cancer has come back.

Stage 4, Multi organ, 6/10 on the aggression scale.

I am eternally thankful for my job for providing such epic medical coverage, but even with that we're tapped out and 48 hours ago we got a medical bill in the mail.

More then $5K, even with my insurance, and with our savings depleted and mine the only income as my orca is still undergoing chemo, and even with his disability our income is a fraction of what it was before all this started.

I hate asking, but we have started a gofundme, to help cover our medical costs, which will be ongoing till christmas at minimum. (BTW, our housemates, , , and our housetiger, are incredible folk and have been so helpful with this, I am beyond thankful for them).

If you can, please help or spread the word. All of you are amazing folk, and anything you do, I am thankful and grateful for:)
https://www.gofundme.com/f/help-den....._source=copy_link&lang=en_US

Some folks call it Christmas, Others Hanukah or so many other names. But I'll say "Fishmas", because to me it means sharing strength and good wishes and caring for everyone. And for phins, shared strength is sharing caught fish, celebrating life, and being thankful for your pod and those who are close in your heart.

Wherever you're from, whoever you think delivers blessings and joy, in the end we're all Sapient, we're all individuals. And we're all choosing to be here, on a site dedicated to the idea we, as a community, are stronger together and should celebrate that togetherness like the messy, silly sometimes dysfunctional family we are. Lets celebrate that together, and enjoy the fact that for as long as we can, we get to have each other and share our joys.

Merry Fishmas, Ya sweet, Filthy Animals. Here's to lots of laughter and smiles, lots of goofy jokes and shared moments, and may the heavens above and warm places below all just let us enjoy some peace, charity, and caring for a day with one another:)

Hey there good folks: Sorry about being silent for so long, it's been a ride these last couple of years.

Moved from Flagstaff to near Fairfield in CA, staying with some awesome folk I consider spirit family, and , Still with the big blue box and now my beloved is driving a bus!

This year has been rough, health wise. Checking back we haven't gone 7 weeks without one of us getting sick or something worse, and Poor Nak has been in the hospital twice for treatment. Never imagined I'd get to put "Administering Antibiotics via Picc line" to my resume, but hey, we're here and still strong, thank Gaia and mother sea.

This has been a rough year for a lot of folk, but the good people on here help me, inspire me, make me feel seen and valued. So for this birthday,

Thank you. Thank you all. You have helped me regain strength, power through, taught me many lessons. You're awesome, and a gigantic family I'm glad to be a part of, Drama and silliness and all.

Here's to me turning 45 in a year, and still being just as thankful:)

Hey there everyone... jeez it's been a while since I posted! My apologies on that for the journals being so few and far between.

I've got a conundrum and need some help: A good friend of mine is in a bind thanks to the IRS through no fault of their own, and I want to help. All I have to offer is my writing ability, so I have to ask: Would anyone be interested in a story commission from me, where I hold an auction and the high bid goes to help my friend and I write a story based upon the high bid's total?

I usually charge about 6-7 Cents a word depending on the content, and how comfortable I am with it. So if someone bid, say, $150 that would be about 2000 words, or several pages.

I'd love to hear if anyone would like a story from this silly phin to help a friend. Please comment below with thoughts, ideas, or "Yeah, I'd buy that!"

So, as some of you like saw in 's journal, I got offered a promotion at work, with one big Caveat... it involves us moving to Flagstaff, AZ. I really like the bay area; I'm a Cali native, down near Los Angeles, and being in my home state, even with all the wackyness of the last few months, was soothing to me. But if I'm going to keep going up, maybe someday make that impossible dream of a career and retiring, I have to try and make this work. From what I understand Flagstaff is to Arizona what Austin is to Texas, so it should have a friendly, laid back vibe with lots of good food and hopefully lotsa nearby furs to make friends with.

There are amazing people here in the Bay area, and leaving means not being near people I've grown to like, grow close to, and even consider family, so it's really bittersweet to be going. A big shout out to the Bay Area Furs, Critters by the bay, and all the good folks that made us feel so welcome. we're going to be thinking of you and missing you. With luck, in a few years I'll have Store Manager next to my name and I can afford a big get together party with everyone on the beach:)

Love and blessings to you all:)

So, my mate Has managed to survive another year on this crazy world, and it's one of the ones ending in '0'. I won't say the exact age(I'll get spanked:P ), but I'm asking if you can to go please to her page on here and give her a big shout wishing her a happy first breath celebration:)

We've been together 20 years, and if I can give her a fraction of the joy she gives me every day, totally worth it:)

Thank you!

Ok, I'm going to be diplomatic but forward here, and it's been 5 months since I posted here so I want this to mean something.

Right now, a lot of the country is having a baptism by fire, because folks are really fed up and not going to take it anymore, and I can't blame them one bit. There are protests going on because A good Man got killed by a policeman while 4 others helped or watched. And they knew he was dying and didn't care. This has been happening almost daily, if not daily, in my home country, the USA, for decades. People who aren't in power get hurt, get abused, and when they try to get that pain addressed, get justice, the law structures and government in place tells them that their pain doesn't matter. And they get no justice, and sometimes even punished for daring to speak up.

That's whats being protested. Not a right to loot or cause mayhem, but a right to live without fear, to not be scared to simply exist because someone might decide they don't like you and want to destroy your life from sheer spite. That's not what America is supposed to be. That's not the America I was raised to be proud of. But like a lot of folks, I had to be woken up to see the horrible injustice and cruelty being inflicted just because some sick person could to feel powerful. I've been in shelters for battered women and children, running from abusive spouses. I've had my life threatened for being gay, or for being friends with POC, even just growing up.

And I can't put into words all the feelings I have, so I'll just try my best. I Support BLM. I support Pride. I believe, with all my heart, that nobody should ever have to be afraid to walk down a sidewalk, should fear an authority figure, or have to run and hide on the word of someone who simply decided they wanted to be 'tough'.

Bullies are cowards. Racists are fools, and bigots have no place in this fandom or in *any* fandom. They're going to fight us, tooth and nail, gun and knife, because they refuse to be equals with us. But we are stronger then them, and don't have to resort to violence. We have each other, a family made of emotions and support and a thousand things we can all share. We can be peaceful, and let them yell and scream at us, but they can't beat us.

Looting is never a good answer; property damage is never a good answer. They're the destroyers; we're the creators. We choose the better, stronger path. And when we triumph, when change comes, they'll be the ones crying in the corner in fear, while we walk by them and help the world be a better place. I know I'm speaking from a point of privilege; I might be pan and married to a male presenting intersex, but my skin means the cops give me privilege, the system gives me privilege. And I plan on using it to help those who don't have that privilege, until *everyone* gets it.

We've got a lot of work to do, good folks. But I'm going to be doing all I can to help. And I hope you will too.

Merry fishmas to all of you wonderful folk out there!

Every winter solstice, phins celebrate by catching and sharing fish and other food, thanking each other for all the things done together since the last winter. I wish you all the joy of being surrounded by those who care about you and treat you well, and the knowledge you are cared for and about.

May you all find much to be joyful for!

Ok, the last couple of years have been a pretty wild ride; My almost dying, my husband orca having kidney cancer, it's definitely been an adventure.

But through it all, something always made me thankful, made me glad. And that's having all of you, a family and friends that accepted me for who and what I am. Knowing that people care about you, whether nearby or close, provides a sense of security, a warmth, that nothing else can.

All of you are my family; my dysfunctional, kinky, silly, fun loving and over the top family in spirit. So thank you, on this day of feasting and swollen bellies and people arguing silly little things, for helping this goofball dolphin know that people care.

There are still good people in the world, and for you to put up with all my hijinx, bad jokes, and silliness you're probably among them:)

Thank you!

Ok, Hawaii was simply amazing; surprisingly affordable too, thanks to some recent airfare changes.

We spent several days in Kona at a place called the Dragonfly Ranch(google it) and the people there were awesome; was a very natural setting, falling asleep to 'cookie' frogs and waking up whenever. Yes, we saw the volcanos, and we got to swim with wild spinner dolphins(they played with !


But, it also made me realize how close I came to not having any of this; it's been almost 18 months since I got the gillain-barre', and if It weren't for all you good folks I wouldn't still be here.


Thank you for helping save my life, thank you for helping me get to keep enjoying this incredible world we live in, and all the amazing people here who help me know I'm not alone:)

I know I haven't really been posting many journals on here, and I apologize for that.

A lot's gone on, poor Managed to fight off Kidney Cancer thanks to Modern day medical science and with lots of support, but the big news is, well...

and I officially hit our 20th Anniversary together on June 30th. And my beloved orca's B-day is on the 20th, so we wanted to celebrate, and make it something to always treasure.


So, tomorrow we're Heading to Hilo in Hawaii, going to hit up a place called the dragonfly Ranch, and spend the week just honeymooning all over again:)


We're going to be out of touch till we get back the 21st or so, so we'll probably be silent; I may bop in on Twitter now and then, but it'll mostly be spending time swimming with some local spinner phins, seeing the volcanos, and re-acquainting myself with the wonderful mate who I met 20 years ago and made my heart open in so many ways:)


Thank you, all of you; I wouldn't have met my mate without the fandom, without all of you wonderful, sweet folk. Thank you from the bottom of our hearts for so much joy and helping support us through the years:)

Apologies on being so silent of late; it's been an interesting year, especially in the last few months.

Got better from the Gillain-barre, found out had kidney cancer, had the kidney removed, and now are on cancer deterrence treatments using her immune system.

Someone very close to us lost family as well, in fact everyone in our house had something happen, though I will let them decide to say what or how.

I look forward to 2019 with renewed eagerness for forging ahead; got me a scooter thanks to help from several friends and I'm going on January 11th to test for my learners permit, wish me luck!

I would not be here if it weren't for the incredible support of the fandom and all you wonderful folks. Thank you so much again for all the joys you share with me:)

Lots of things have been happening in the last week;

Turns out my beloved had kidney tumors and had to have his left kidney removed; thank goodness, it turned out that the tumors were benign so my orca should be clean, if hurt from the surgery and in recovery for the next 6 weeks. But My beloved is in good spirits and we're even going to Folsom, so if you see us there please say hi:)



Also, my good friend Is trying to raise funds to help him go visit and help comfort him after a rather nasty life event:

Details are here:

http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/8888919/

I am happy to report I just finished my first week back at work; I'm still recovering strength in my legs and back, but I am up, able, and definitely better then I was not too long ago. I have officially been medically discharged from in home therapy, and am pleased to announce my Diabetes is back under control sans insulin(I'm type 2), and that I am feeling immensely better then I imagined even a month ago.

To all of you who supported me, whether It was money, cards, or simple warm wishes, thank you so much. I cannot repay the debt I owe you for helping me survive and regain my strength from a very bad place and a very bad time. You all are blessings in this world and I am so lucky to be part of such a tremendously compassionate, caring, and open community. You are all heroes in my eyes:)

And Yes, , , and and I will be at BLFC, suiting and partying and having all the fun we can:) Hope to see you there!:D

Ok, Those of you watching me may have noticed I went silent around 7 weeks ago, February 12th or so.

Long story short, I got something called Guillain-Barre Syndrome, or GBS.
link: ( https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases.....s/syc-20362793 )

The first day I thought I'd pinched a nerve, went about my business, work. Etc. Second day I couldn't walk straight, fell managed to twist my left ankle, and my hands, mouth, and feet went numb. I went from work, to urgent care, to the ER, at which point they discovered I also had pneumonia and I got intubated and sedated so I wouldn't struggle. Sad part is, I'm resistant to a lot of sedatives, so until they found the right one I was awake, aware, and just stoned off my flukes. Thank heaven was there the whole time, and I had other friends visit me along with my mom and little sister.

I was under 10 days while they pumped me full of antibiotics as my immune system was busy nomming my nerves, then the pneumonia finally broke and the treatment they gave me had a chance to really work. Two weeks later, I got released to physical rehab, and now I'm re-learning how to walk using a walker and training my hands to type and play video games and such again. There's a lot more to it, but I don't want to bore you good folks with 5 pages of detail. If you want more just ask:) Besides, it hurts to type until my nerves(hopefully) rebuild themselves.

So yeah, near death experiences tend to make it hard to use a laptop or phone, I apologize for any distress or such I've caused, but it's been quite a trip, and it's ongoing.

One of the most amazing things for me is realizing how many friends, good folks, and just amazing people I have in my life. started a gofundme to help cover my medical bills: ( https://www.gofundme.com/a-big-hear.....-a-little-help ) and even took some commissions to help fund it

and both tossed in funds, plus tons of anonymous people too. got a massive load of cards and gifts and even a poster mailed to me from more people then I can count, I got gift boxes, plushies... I wouldn't be out of rehab and typing as fast as I did if I didn't have you awesome people in my life. I even got visitors in the hospital and physical rehab facilities, and my mate and housemates and friends all worked together to keep my morale up, and to help me recover. I have had my faith in the world refilled to overflowing thanks to all you wonderful, kindhearted, good people.

Thank you seems so inadequate in the face of all the good you've done for me, but I will have to settle for it for now:) thank you all so very much!:D

TL:DR : Nearly died from my immune system eating my nerves + penumonia, 7 weeks in hospital and rehab with no net, Furries are fragging awesome

Well, in about half an hour myself, , , and will be heading out to the airport and taking a flight to visit a few good folks, and then be con-Staff at Furpocalypse for a few days. Connectivity is gonna be limited, so I'll reply if/when I can:)

Be excellent to each other, good folks:)

For those who don't know, my beloved mate Has a birthday today, though I won't say the exact number for fear of spanking:P If you can, please go give her a shout or a note or just something to help her realize today is an accomplishment, she's survived another crazy year on this blue marble of a planet:)

Thank you!

-Calafin

To all of you wonderful people out there, merry fishmas; may you find joy in places you least expect, presents that make you smile all day, and love that makes your heart warm:)

Blessings to you all:)

I will say that it has been a very, to use the Chinese curse, 'interesting' year... But thanks to my beloved , our housemates and spirit family and , and so many good souls like , , , , and so many others phins and orcas and dragons and gryphons whose ID's I can't even remember, I've made it through.

This is always going to be the year we lost a lot of good people, including my Father: but I have had my faith and love in the good people of the world strengthened. For today, let there be Cake and Merriment and laughter:)

Thank you all for letting me know people care about a silly phin like me: it makes the days forward look even brighter:)

Thank you, all of you, so much for the warm wishes, the caring, the support. I am overwhelmed at how many of you care, how many of you send condolences and comfort and hugs by proxy and so many other wonderful things. You are helping me stay strong, helping me remember all the good things there are in the world.

You have commented on my journal, twittered me, emailed me, phone called me, and every one of you helps keep me from breaking down and crying; The fact that so many care reminds me of a lesson my father taught me, that you strength isn't just measured in yourself, but in the friends you keep, the family you come home to, and the people who care about you.

Thank you seems like far too little to express my gratitude and amazement at you all being such wonderful people, but it will have to suffice for now; thank you all, so very, very much.

For those of you who aren't on my twitter, I just wanted to let you know that I may be... a bit preoccupied for a while.

This morning, my father passed away; he'd been fighting a combination of liver dysfunction, heart problems, and weakened lungs for the last two years, after he almost was lost during surgery.

I am blessed to have so many good people around me offering support, from my mate , from our housemates and close kin and :kyrorazicon : , to so much support from friends who are close in spirit if not flesh, including those we consider family in spirit.

I could go on for pages on the things my dad accomplished, but I will say he was a Radio Engineer, and that he was known and respected in his industry, as well as responsible for a lot of the things that makes modern radio work as well as it does.

He knew I was gay, knew I was a furry, and while he didn't understand he knew that you helped me be happy, and for that he accepted me, accepted us. I don't really know where to go, what to do right now beyond help any and every way I can in the coming days.

Good tidings be with you all, and if you have family that loves and supports you, thank them. You don't realize how precious such a thing is until you feel it slip away.

Taken from as it's been going around again, modified it for cetaceans:)
[x] you Chirrup/Squeak to get attention
[x] you find pets toys amusing
[ ] you get hyper by the smell of catnip
[ ] you growl/hiss when someone gets too close to your food
[ ] you growl/hiss when someone you dislike is too close to you
[x] you Churr/Squeakor shake your leg when someone shows you affection
[ ] if someone tosses a ball, you chase it and bring it back
Total: 3

[ ] you love to be scratched behind the ear
[X] you love fish/meat
[ ] you like to stick your head out trough the window of a moving car.
[x] you like when people pet your head
[ ] people can make you stop doing stuff by hitting you on the nose with a newspaper
[x] you think feathers are fun to play with
Total: 6

[x] you sleep a lot during daytime(given the chance)
[ ] you enjoy scaring birds
[ ] you lick peoples faces to show you like them
[ ] you bite people if they annoy you
[ ] you tend to steal food from your friends/family's plate when you have eaten all of yours
[x] milk or water is your favorite drink(sparkling water (ftw)
Total: 8

[ ] you own a collar and you enjoy wearing it
[ ] you own a leash and enjoy wearing it
[x] you own animal ears/tail/paws or a fursuit
[x] you enjoy long walks in the park/on the beacj
[x] you squeak/beg when you see something you want
Total: 11

[x] you call your hands and feet "paws" or "fins"
[x] you tilt your head when you do not understand what someone is talking about
[ ] you run to the door when someone mentions a walk
[x] you really enjoy cuddling
[ ] you stretch your body and whimper a bit every morning when you wake up
[ ] you can wake up and go back to sleep right away after looking around
Total: 14

[ ] you have your favorite spot besides your bed where you like to sleep
[x] you squeak, whistle, chirrup, or coo very often
[ ] you hide when you get scared
[ ] you run to the door to see who it is every time someone comes in to the house
[ ] you like to chase flying insects and try to catch them with your bare hand
[ ] you tend to chew on stuff a lot
[ ] you like to do tricks to get a treat
Total: 15

[X] you own a wearable item/tag with your name on it
[X] you refer to your self as an animal (Because, yes, we are)
[x] your username has something to do with animals
[x] your e-mail has something to do with animals
[X] if you get a bleeding wound, you lick it to make it feel better (because it actually helps)
[ ] you look for edible stuff often
Total: 20

[ ] you often find yourself looking through the window for a long time
[x] you like to say hi to strangers
[x] you like to be petted when you have done something good
[ ] people think you act like a pet
[x] you squeak indignantly/chuff at stuff you do not like
[ ] you like to eat grass
[ ] if you get wet, you shake to get rid of the water (shaking your hands after washing them before using a paper towel will dry them better and use less paper)
Total: 23

Final total: 23

Take your score and multiply it by 2
Post "I am 46% furry" as your subject line

Well, looks like I'm still just phinny;)

Stolen from






RULE 1. You can only say Guilty or Innocent.

RULE 2. You are not allowed to explain anything unless someone messages you and asks! So please ask cause i love talking about personal stuff XD

Now, here's what you're supposed to do... And please do not spoil the fun. Copy and paste this into your journal, delete my answers, and type in your answers!


1. Asked someone to marry you?
Guilty

2. Kissed one of your friends?
Guilty

3. Danced on a table in a bar?
Semi-Guilty

4. Ever told a lie?
Guilty

5. Had feelings for someone whom you can't have?
Guilty

6. Ever kissed someone of the same sex?
Guilty

7. Kissed a picture?
Guilty

8. Slept in until 5 PM?
Guilty

9. Fallen asleep at work/school?
Guilty

10. Held a snake?
Guilty

11. Been suspended from school?
Guilty

12. Worked at a fast food chain/restaurant?
Guilty

13. Stolen something?
Guilty

14. Been fired from a job?
Guilty

15. Done something you regret?
Guilty

16. Laughed until something you were drinking came out of your nose?
Guilty

17. Caught a snowflake on your tongue?
Guilty

18. Kissed in the rain?
Guilty

19. Sat on a roof top?
Guilty

20. Kissed someone you shouldn't?
Guilty

21. Sang in the shower?
Guilty

22. Been pushed into a pool with all your clothes on?
Guilty

23. Shaved your head?
Innocent

24. Slept naked?
Guilty

25. Had a boxing membership?
Innocent

26. Made a boyfriend/girlfriend cry?
Guilty

27. Been in a band?
Innocent

28. Shot a gun?
Guilty

29. Donated Blood?
Innocent

30. Eaten alligator meat?
Innocent

31. Eaten cheesecake?
Guilty

32. Still love someone you shouldn't?
Innocent

33. Have/had a tattoo?
Guilty

34. Liked someone, but will never tell who?
Guilty

35. Been too honest?
Guilty

36. Ruined a surprise?
Guilty

37. Ate in a restaurant and got really bloated that you can't walk afterwards?
Guilty

38. Erased someone in your friends list?
Guilty

39. Dressed in a woman's clothes (if you're a guy) or man's clothes (if you're a girl)?
Guilty

40. Joined a pageant
Innocent

41. Been told that you're handsome or beautiful by someone who totally meant what they said?
Guilty

42. Still have communication w/ your ex?
Innocent

43. Cheated on someone?
Innocent

44. Get totally drunk one night and you have an important exam tomorrow morning?
Innocent

45. A total stranger treated you by paying your fare?
Innocent

46. Get totally angry that you cried so hard?
Guilty

47. Tried to stay away from someone for their own good?
Guilty

48. Thought about suicide?
Guilty

49. Thought about murder?
Guilty

50. How about Mass Murder?
Guilty

51. Rode in a stranger's vehicle?
Guilty

52. Stalked someone?
Innocent

53. Had a girlfriend/boyfriend?
Guilty

Arrival and Departure:
Buttcrack of dawn on the 13th till evening on the 16th

Where are you staying?
GSR

Mode of Transportation?
The Kyro-mobile!

Who will you be with?
, , and also hanging out with

How is the best way to find you?
Look around the con for my dolphin fursuit, usually accompanied by my mate's orca fursuit, and I'll 90% of the time have a dolphin on me somewhere

What are your Major Plans?
Meet up with friends, get some sweet art, get on the dance floor at least once

Attending Parties?
If my mate and I get invited to one, maybe

What is your gender?
Boyphin!

Can I talk to you?
Sure, go ahead:)

Can I hug you?
If I know you, definitely; If I'm in fursuit or you introduce yourself, probably yes:)

Can I commission you?
I write stories, does that count?

What events will you be attending?
Not sure; was going to do an aquatics panel, no-one ever got back to me

If I see you, how should I get your attention?
Say hi, call my name, or just walk on up:)