oh boy, here comes the fun. lack of capitalization aside, let's get on with it.

so, first things first--there's no telling how fast I'll be able to do these. I have school to work with.
secondly, I love having free reign over what to draw, but sometimes my mind sucks and I can't think of any good ideas, so it wouldn't hurt to lead me in some kind of direction.

alright! getting on with the requests.

going to keep three slots and three slots only.
first come, first serve. nothing too extreme, so in other words...no more than two characters in a piece.

whenever I finish one request, another slot's open, buuuuut I won't tell you when it's open so you will have to keep a watch on that. think I'll try to keep a good track of it via my user page, so hey. go for it.

now that I think I covered everything, let's get this show on the road.

ready set go!

edit: okay, that was fast. seriously.

I don't mean to have...depressing journals, but...
I feel conflicted right now.

If I could properly draw vent art, I would, and if I could sleep, well...I'd sleep.

I just don't know what to do and I'm just so frustrated because I feel like in the end, no matter what I do, I'm going to end up feeling hurt.

...I need someone to talk to.
Well...someone that understands relationships and whatnot. I'm at a loss and...I just feel bad.

Everything sort of sucks right now.

I got a speeding ticket.......but I never remember seeing that sign.

I can barely draw. Barely.

Drama follows me everywhere...especially on twitter.

My drawing class is agitating.

My girlfriend has a stalker that is some sort of twisted psychopath.

...something about drawing.

FML.



....can I have a hug?

Seriously.

Trying to draw is also frustrating...but it's not as bad since I'm taking a drawing class at school...
There's also the fact that I got a speeding ticket Wednesday, so that was just...augh.

I am just frustrated with so much right now that I really dunno what to do now.
So I guess I'll just sit here and brood......and maybe try to draw some more.

Edit: also, sorry if it seems like it's brief or anything, but I'm simply putting my frustrations here because I don't want someone to really see that I'm in a...less than pleasant mood, I guess. Maybe I need to talk, but jeez, I don't even know anymore.

...give me some time, I've...forgotten how to draw.
Sooo.....can I just...borrow someone? A simple character?

Why not use mine? Umm....well.
...I want to redesign them first...and I don't like doing that...drawing them. That is.

Anyhow. Just. Lemme borrow them for a moment so I can...attempt to doodle them.
[seriously I need practice here]

I've somewhat agreed to listen to my baby and go to bed at a semi-decent time, so I'll try and start practicing tomorrow...if I don't get too sidetracked.
and don't go thinking this is a request journal, okay

First off. Hi. It's been a while.

Secondly...I've forgotten both my username and password to my new account.

And lastly, that was terrible of me. I was not expecting to just up and disappear like that, I was being smothered by a 14 year old on the internet and then it all went down from there.

...and 79438 new messages jesus.

Anyways...if you guys don't actually hate me for disappearing like that...I think I can give this place a shot again. I just...have to relearn how to draw again, I halfway stopped doing that too [seriously, shit happens] and I regret it. I'm trying to get back into it, and school's starting back soon so I can't promise I won't be active...

Oh...belated Happy New Year to you guys!

So...if you guys are cool with me trying to sneak back in here, then I'll try and see how well I can get my drawing mojo flowing again.
...and if someone can help me out with that other account of mine, I would be more than happy with that too, thanks.

......and...how are you guys?

edit: about those notes...is it acceptable to answer them months after...I feel weird answering something old...

You want it? Find it.



Actually, no, if we're pretty cool, note me.
It's a bit vacant right now, so I kinda need some things to fill it up with anyways

and i'll get to watching people there later, for now...eh.

Edit: To the next guys that intend on noting me, I'ma be asleep. So you guys. Gonna have to wait.
Edit 2: Unless I absolutely *know* you and/or frequently talk to you, I can't help you now, kthnx.

As sad as I am to say it, I have no intentions on updating and returning to this account. However, I will be on the other art sites and twitter [all links here], but I'll no longer be under this account as chedarr. Though if you want to keep in touch, that's fine too, but I've grown to the point where I don't know if people actually...care.

Nonetheless, it's been a fun ride! Peace!

Alright, if I leave the free requests journal hanging around in the front people are still gonna think I'm actually taking them while I'm not here, bwuh =A=

SO. INSTEAD. I'm gonna leave some other journal up saying where else you can catch me if you have accounts there already!

WAYS TO CONTACT ME/OTHER PLACES TO STALK ME

msn/e-mail: cheezpotatoez[at]hotmail.com [and do note my msn won't notify me if anyone adds me anymore, so try and find a way to let me know]
Skype: chedarrcheez [tell me who you are, ok?]
deviantArt: Muzzel though I may move over to chedarr soon
inkbunny: chedarr/erogenousdairy [shota/cub alert on erogenousdairy]
LiveJournal: chedarr [do note, semi-friends only]
Tumblr: chedarr [Dude, I rarely even use this, dunno why I have it]
Twitter: chedarrcheez [BEWARE, I TEND TO TWEET SPAM AT TIMES]

Aaaaaaaaaaand I think I've gotten all the sites that I'm at. Also, yes, I do have a Facebook, but I don't really know if I'm willing to give you guys that...yet. xD

Though for those of you that won't follow me, I'll miss you. <3

Yeah.

Just once.
I'll either do multiple sketch requests or just one coloured request.

And then that'll be it. I'll officially be moving the last of my submissions to the scraps [maybe] and taking leave from here.

While I don't think it's quite...right for me to just up and leave on my birthday...
...yes, it's my birthday. But why would you be concerned? You're just here for the art.

Just...just leave a ref, and I'll try to get on them asap.
I probably won't post them though.

...but if I do then, I don't mind.

As for the other art I owe, I'll finish them and get back to you guys.


Ha.
...you want that art or not?

Must I explain myself with every action I'd like to take?

I'm just fed up. I'm sick of putting up with this place. You practically always have to submit porn just so you can get just a little bit of feedback and over half of the people here are pretty much just horny little leg-humping art moochers that always want art from artists. I probably would have totally attempted to deal with this if they were a little more grateful but no. Just no, I'm tired of dealing with it. I've generously accepted and allowed all the douchebags and other people to walk all over me for years and draw them art.

Yes, I'm sore because people aren't grateful for the art I do and give me little feedback. Excuse me for being so bloody discouraged by this, but I DO have feelings to; I'm not just a bloody vending machine here!

Just forget it. If I decide to come back then fine. If not, fine.

If you need me, I'll be anywhere but here.

Was a nice ride, but I want off now.

...if it's what it looks like, then yes, it's probably true.

Was a fun ride though.

...I never knew that there was a such thing as twitter jail.

My dad thought it was a fun idea to lecture me at 1 in the morning whenever I'm feeling really agitated and tired.

Yep. He thought it was a great idea to lecture me about my grades. Well I'm sorry I'm failing calculus and I'm sorry I'm not doing so good in government. I'm sorry I'm not the honor roll student I used to be, and I'm sorry I quit listening to you whenever you yell at me! I am just tired of it...I'm tired of it all. I just can't handle this crap anymore. It's annoying, it's tiring, I'm stressed, and I have my own problems I can't seem to figure out! I just want to really be left alone in life and bothering me to death about it just makes it all worse.

...I mean, can't I at least go for a single month without wanting to put a bullet in my head?

I hate my life...I hate it, I hate it, I hate it...
...I need a life better than this.

I WILL ALSO MENTION THAT BECAUSE MY DAD THINKS TAKING ALL MY TECHNOLOGY AWAY WILL DO SOMETHING TO IMPROVE MY GRADES. HAHAHAHAHA FUCK THIS I SHOULD'VE BEEN DEAD YEARS AGO

broken drawing motivation thanks to a computer mishap and now i'm halfway iffy with wanting to do requests anymore since i don't think you guys are grateful enough


eh.


when i'm done, i guess i should be done then

and it wasn't me having a one night stand with your boyfriend either

I was gonna wait it out longer but I guess since it wasn't really...porn then I wouldn't get too much.

K!

So, the three random numbers were:
48. 12. and 8

Which means we have our closest winners
 ex626akakeon

 Touei

 Happyhuskykoma


Since I'm not sure who's gonna go where I'm gonna play a nice game of eenie meenie miney mo xD


also i may totally do something like this next time
maybe a bit r-18 but i'm gonna do it

and have it done later today? or at some point...exams are coming up and last thing I need to do is kinda bomb any of them. xD;;

ANYWAYS.

I'ma do free art for you guys.

And unless you are perfectly ok with shota then no you cannot have one. >:C
leave a ref and let's go

...also I totally don't know how far I'd go with drawing, but I never said I'd post it. xD

I think I have an inkbunny account specifically for this purpose but I can't quite remember the name. ^^;

stoppit

...today is stupid.

No, this is actually Nikki speaking.
Me. Like actually me. The cheese.

I'm not back, nor am I actually calling this my return either. I just have a couple of things I'd like to say, which are kinda sorta important anyways...

First off, since both of them are bad news, I'm going to begin with the most terrible one...though there's a TL;DR version at the bottom, so skip all this if you have a short attention span.

Grades. School. Honestly, I'm still not really doing too much even while this account's under the hands of someone else. I mean, even though I haven't in the least thought about FA doesn't really mean anything. I already know I haven't been doing too good in American Government simply because I still have yet to shift over from the lack of notes in Economics to the mass amounts of notes and listing in Government. I've bombed the last two tests [and I really mean bombed, like badly bombed kind of bombed] and while I'm beating myself up over it I've practically quit doing work in that class, so I know my grade isn't looking good at all. Progress reports come out this week and well...I just know that it's gonna be BAD. I mean, probably bad enough to where my dad might decide to practically ground me from my computer and stuff to where my limited visits would probably become no visits. Not to mention my calculus grade still sucks and I'm still the dumbest person in that class and every time my teacher says I'm doing good it stabs me in the heart and pretty much everything inside me dies...I mean yes, math is also destroying me piece by piece and really I'm just falling apart here. I don't know anymore...I really don't...so I wouldn't be surprised if I could kiss all my technology goodbye...probably deserve it anyways. It's ok, I guess...not the first time I've fucked up this badly.

...probably should have started off with the _better_ bad news anyways...

SECONDLY.

I can't do digital art anymore. I am pretty much incapable of it. Yes, I can traditionally do things but that's it. I'm so used to using my tablet for everything that now I can't really use a mouse for anything else but browsing the internet and a few games. Yeah, I was trying to do a little art but now that my pen is ultimately dead I can't draw anything and my dad won't even bother helping me out with a hobby a love by buying me another one...so yeah...

...can't really art, and unless you're cool with seeing a bunch of unfinished WIPs in the future then I probably won't really submit anything...at least until I get myself a job and make enough money to try and buy my own tablet or something. Honestly, it's kinda devastating to me...you help me send in college applications so I can help myself major in art, and now you won't really help me out all that much just to get a new tablet just so I can art...and probably help myself in college in the far future...

*sigh*

I'm sorry for having a relatively depressing journal...I am just a lump of sadness right now...guess I'll just...doodle on paper and try to jot down more info for my research paper...

TL;DR - ched dun fucked up with school [again] and her tablet pen doesn't work anymore so she can't finish any art

'preciate it, guys.

Here's the list of the 15!
In no particular order for the moment:

There's a few who get to be in certain spots simply because...well I can't say no, but as for the rest they'll be placed in wherever I feel like. WHEREVER. >:

1. Marcus
2. Drew
3. Moto
4. Nikki
5. lurking_pie
6. marc258
7. Loralillie_Rowle
8. talen2534 Ref 2
9. Asher2500
10. Jakesparrow0 Ref 2
11. ex626akakeon - by request, gets to be in Simon's spot
12. Supa_Huskey - may possibly take Celty's spot
13. Dr_Nathaniel_J
14. Tsukun
15. TruentYena - GETS TO BE IN SHIZUO'S SPOT

This list is just a note for myself...as far as making it easy for me to get to refs.

Excuse me for getting into a show so...quickly. xD
...and so late.

BUT.

Hanging chain.


*mind you, it's flipped. >:C

or if you can't be arsed then you can this really big ass picture

I wanted to do it with my own characters but I literally don't have enough.

FIFTEEN.

Marcus, Drew, Nikki, Moto and 42 [lurking_pie's char] get to be a part of it.
CAUSE THEY HAVE TO.

There's 10 slots left...character can't be too complex, but if these slots don't fill up then I'm either gonna use some of my other characters or ask other people. >:

WANNA DO IT?

WANNA BE IN THE CHAIN?

...don't worry, nobody's gonna fall.
yet.

DO IT?

YES?

YES

NO?

YES?

Mind you, this is a side project, only to be done in my free time, ok?
So I can't promise it being done *just like that*
Other owed art comes first.

EDIT: MIND YOU, ONLY ONE CHARACTER PER PERSON

ALSO.

 ex626akakeon gets to be in the black guy's spot just cause he said so xD
BUT FOR THE REST OF YOU I PICK THE FITTING SPOTS

[15/15 SLOTS FILLED]

In fact, yes, I did have a list. I also unconsciously deleted my notes sometime back, and since few people that I owed art too [might I add I even posted a list, but I refused to go as far as sending notes contacting the people because it's not my responsibility; you want art, you better keep up with it yourself]. I'm quite aware that I still have a couple of trades, collabs, and requests that I must do though...at least those that actually kept up it anyways.

Now, to the actual point of this journal.

I've been in an idea slump for I'm not sure how long, and honestly I can't seem to pry any ideas out of people that I may seem to like enough. So basically, this is going to be a request journal. There's no guarantee I'll do them all [if any], and there's also no guarantee as to how the format will be. I'm not promising you anything, so don't even try to harass me about owing you art from this journal.

If I ever end up "finished" with whatever I feel like doing in this journal, I'll delete and possibly create another one in the future, depending on how this one goes.

Requests can be of almost anything, EXCEPT ADULT ART. I will not draw porn for you [at least without getting something in return anyways], so don't ask for anything involving 'unffage'. I will go to the lengths of drawing cartoon nudity of tasteful nudity, but that's it.

I also require PICTURE references, because those are much easier to work with than textual references.

Also, please, no comments asking if you can have one. Just put what you want, and if I like it enough I'll draw it however I like, simple enough.

...and before you ask, lurking_pie, YES...I will do stories. Ok, shut up. >:C

--oh and P.S. Don't ask me about owed art. I'm well aware of the few of you that probably hate my guts because I've literally owed you for like...forever.

EDIT: Ok, so I totally forgot about mentioning this because I never thought about it, but now that I've seen it, can you please link to clean references only? Please? I mean if that's like the *only* ref you have then I guess it's ok but I don't like staring at peen...really.