jfnwijfnwjiwirniu Finally done with finals. My brain cells can finally take a break. ;A;

The idea of a post-apocalyptic situation is appealing to many people, whether the cause stems from nuclear warfare (Fallout), zombies (The Walking Dead), or diseases (The Last of Us). I too am one of those people, and the idea of post-apocalyptic fiction is one of my most favorite genres of all time. But I digress: I wanted to create a guide that highlights cliches or unrealistic expectations I’ve seen within this genre. However, I did add some exceptions I think could work if that cliche or expectation is still implemented. If anyone believes I’ve missed anything or wants to add their own opinion, feel free to comment below!

Before I begin, I am not saying cliches are bad, especially because cliches are unavoidable and are used everywhere. What matters with cliches is how you decide to handle them, rather than whether or not you use them. Anyway, please have fun with the read!

Note: I meant to post this journal a while back, but I didn't remember to until now. Also, I know some of these don't necessarily pertain to furries (ex. my body hair tip) but I wanted to keep those in anyway in order to stay true to my original list on deviantArt. Have fun reading!

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1. “Oh, how convenient!”

We’re in poisonous gas zone? I just happened to have enough gas masks for everyone! We’re low on food? Well, I just happened to come across an abandoned store that has tons of it! You have a flesh wound? I can patch that right up!

My first point applies to a character who just happens to have a convenient item for every situation. I’m positive that in a real post-apocalyptic situation, supplies wouldn’t just conveniently come your way, nor will you happen to have the right items most of the time. So, it’s highly-likely you wouldn’t be able to do much about the situation. It sucks, but life isn’t perfect, and it would be even less perfect during a situation like this.

Exception(s):
•Your character is a survival specialist, so knows how to track, purify dirty water, skin an animal, how to forage for berries, or craft anything essential to survival

2. Underdressing

For female characters who have skimpy designs, tell me, how will running around in nothing but a bra and panties protect you against zombies, radiation, bullets, and who knows what else? Showing off skin is not beneficial in an apocalypse. Your goal is to survive, not to give everyone a glimpse of your cleavage and buttocks! You can’t look sexy and go out fighting zombies or other survivors at the same time. Even if you only wear a shirt and pants, that is still more protection than going out wearing a bikini or your underwear. Be sure to also let me know how your exposed skin fares as it peels and becomes irradiated once bits and pieces of fallout hit it and slowly eat away at it.

As for male characters, this mainly goes for showing off his chest. Like with the female character wearing a bra and no shirt, how does a man’s bare chest equate to badassery? All it does is expose his skin to the elements, biting insects, and more elements of nature. Putting on a shirt does not take much effort, I promise.

Exception(s) :
•When a character is in the middle of intercourse. Even then, I don’t imagine rampant sex would be the first thing on the minds of most people here, especially since pregnancy or STDs are a huge risk in this environment
•If their clothing was ripped in a few areas. However, don’t overdo the rips unless your character’s clothing is literally the only set of clothing they have. Even then, I’m sure that they would go out to search for new clothes or would try to repair the holes in their current set
•If your character does not need to have lots of layers because they live in a very warm or humid climate. Even then, this does not give them an excuse to show off their chest, legs, and butt

3. Overdressing

This one is short, since it isn’t that big of a cliche. The only thing I can say would be wrong with this would be having so many layers that your character is weighed down.

Exception(s):
•When your character is going through a radioactive place, light clothing will not be their friend. Layers might help to give your character a slight bit of armor (somewhat, anyway; some materials protect better than others)
•When it’s extremely cold somewhere and your character is trying to keep warm

4. Fitting Clothing

I don’t mean this as in the clothes fit your character. I mean “fitting” as in the clothes are good for the situation they are in. I touched on this in the previous two points, but I wanted to give it its own section here. For instance, do not make your female character run around in a tight leather bodysuit or have her wear a booty skirt. In addition, do not make your male character run around shirtless (as mentioned in "Underdressing") or wearing crotch-hugging jeans.

Dresses and skirts also aren’t a very good idea to wear, as they can easily be caught on things. Items like heels or dress shoes won’t help the situation, either. Tennis shoes would be good to wear. However, if someone can send me a video of themselves wearing a pair of high heels while sprinting across rough terrain, I will retract this statement and give you a million dollars.

Finally, give your characters room to breathe. This isn’t a fashion mall (clothing looks fancy), a porno (clothing is highly revealing), nor is it a cosplaying convention (clothing is on par with Final Fantasy designs). Basically, give them comfortable clothes that aren’t so tight that they can’t breathe, nor clothes that are so loose that they have to keep pulling their clothes over their body as they explore places.

Exception(s):
•Your character has clothing leftover from a party, graduation, formal event, etc. from the past. I still see no reason to have your character wear these, though

5. Makeup

There's an apocalypse? Perfect time to apply my makeup!

This is mainly geared towards female characters. Lady, you’re in the middle of a post-apocalyptic setting. Your makeup can wait. Makeup is practically useless in a situation like this since your character’s eyeliner, eyeshadow, mascara, lipstick, and whatnot will just run down her face the moment she becomes sweaty, bloody, or anything else. OK, say she has waterproof makeup—I’m still sure it will rub off her face after quite a bit, though. Dirt would also eventually cake up on her face, so it makes no sense to have her reapply layers of makeup. The makeup won’t benefit your character at all, so just have her throw it away.

This goes for prettying up fingernails and toenails as well: have fun trying to polish, trim, file, or glue on acrylic nails on while being chased by zombies. Oh, your nail broke while you were trying to reload your bullets? Pobrecita.

Exception(s) :
•Admittedly, there is an exception: if your character received tattooed makeup before the apocalypse began. Aside from that, I don’t see any others since makeup is useless when it comes to survival

6. Trigger Happiness

“My character has never had any gun training, they aren’t fit in the slightest, but they can still use a shotgun with no problem.”

I know the prospect of a gun-slinging survivalist sounds appealing and awesome, but let’s think outside the box a little bit. I see many post-apocalyptic characters that just carry guns with no explanation for how they use them or how they picked up a gun in the first place. Admittedly, while that isn’t required to put down, it would still be some information that could establish your character’s credibility. For instance, is your character an expert with that sniper rifle they have because they had professional training? Oh hello, your other character can easily handle a shotgun, I see. In that case, your character should have enough height and mass on their body to sustain the recoil of a shotgun. Someone of my height (4’11”), little developed muscle mass, and no gun experience would have their ribs broken from firing a gun with as much recoil as a shotgun. So, fitting your character with a gun that matches their history with gun use and their body type can help make their gun choice a bit more realistic.

Another part of this topic includes a character wielding guns upon guns upon guns. To my knowledge, it is impossible to keep five trigger-based weapons on your person every single day, with two of them being a sniper rifle and a shotgun, another one being a flamethrower, and the last two being pistols. Wouldn’t carrying all of that be heavy for your character, especially if they don’t weigh that much? Cue back pains and the task of having to switch between all those guns when using them or being weighed down when running away. On top of this, where is your character getting all that ammo? Not only is that quite a bit of ammo to keep track of, but it would be a great task to even find the ammo for all the guns.

Exception(s):
•I suppose if your character collected guns before everything went downhill, and just happened to have lots of ammo for every single one of those guns. Even then, having this many guns would be most useful when you are holed up rather than carrying them all on your person
•If your character is part of a group, and there are many guns between them. Still, it would be better for you to give every person only one to two guns instead of rely on giving one person every gun

7. Melee Weapons and Exotic Weapons

First thing’s first, use a melee weapon that will actually help your character’s situation. For instance, don’t have them go running around with a grim reaper scythe in an apocalypse. Owning a scythe will end up getting your character killed (unless it is a battle scythe, but most people do not carry those on them). Some common examples of fitting weapons include manufactured household items like knives or bats, or even planks of wood from a torn-down home. Bows and crossbows would also be acceptable since they tend to be used for both sport and hunting even today (heck, I myself own a compound bow). However, the only problem with bows and crossbows is that you would need to keep track of your arrows and bolts. It’s not exactly uncommon for arrows to be drilled into an object so hard that you can’t recover them. So, if you give your character a bow, be cautious with that sort of thing.

One last thing regarding archer characters: their arms and fingers should not be bare. Without a finger guard, the bowstring would end up cutting and chafing their fingers (I’m talking from painful experience here) and without an arm guard, a fired bowstring will slide up their arm and leave an excruciating bruise and/or tear off their skin. In the event your character does not have manufactured guards, have them create makeshift ones from a thick layer of tightly-wrapped fabric.

Exception(s):
•Cultural reasons. Weapons differ from region to region. For example, if your character lives in Scotland, maybe they might own a claymore that they looted from one of Scotland’s many castles. However, make sure they are able to lift it and properly use it. If a scrawny guy or girl tried to lift up a claymore without any prior training, they’d better be ready for their arms to shatter. On top of this, make sure they also have the decency to know how to use it. Don’t just have them go around flailing the claymore everywhere just for show unless their tactic is to bluff or to intimidate others. But again, the character needs to be fit enough to lift and use the weapon

8. Colored Hair, Clean Hair, and Hair Length

It’s been a few years into the apocalypse. Why is your character’s hair still a brilliant shade of pink? In addition, how is their hair perfectly-brushed, smooth, and clean? In real life, your character’s natural hair color would eventually replace the colored hair. Whether the highlights are hot pink, electric blue, seafoam green, or even natural tones, they will not stay forever. In terms of styling, your character’s natural hairstyle should also come back after a while. I should not see a curly-haired person running around with completely straight hair, nor should I see a straight-haired individual having fresh curls on their head.

My next point about hair regards the cleanliness of your character’s hair. Much of the time, your character’s hair will not be squeaky clean. Their hair will become gritty with dust and dirt, and most of the time, they will not have time for a full wash with shampoo and conditioner every week or so. Once in a while, yes, but not frequently. Don’t expect their hair to smell nice after a while, either.

Finally, here comes hair length. An ideal length for this situation would be shoulder length and shorter. Waist-down and longer, and your character’s hair can get tangled in lots of things or be grabbed for leverage. To avoid this, I recommend having your character cut their hair short, cut it off completely, or wear it in a braid, bun, or ponytail.

Exception(s):
•The apocalypse just happened to start as your character got their hair colored and/or textured. For coloring, any longer than a few months to a few years (certain hair dyes can stay in for quite a while) will make the color fade, and texturing should stay no longer than a week to a month
•Your character owns a wig or a weave
•If your character has a relaxer. Relaxed hair does not return to its original state, so the only way to get rid of relaxed hair is to do a full chop and let the hair grow back naturally
•Religious reasons. In terms of hair length, I’m aware that in some religions, cutting off your hair is unlawful, and should never be done. I have a friend of Sikh culture whose hair is down to her feet, but she manages to neatly wrap up her hair in her dastar. So, the character can do something similar to this

9. Clean Skin and Body Hair

Just like with perfectly-clean hair, your character will not have perfectly-clean skin, especially around the facial area, hands, feet, and in some cases, the arms and legs. I’ve seen many characters have squeaky-clean faces, when in this situation your character will get scratches, bruises, and their faces will become dirty. Plus, it adds a fitting sense of grunge to your character, given the dirty state of everything else around them. As for my second argument…

Oh no, armpit hair, leg hair, and pubic hair. So gross.

It is hair that occurs naturally on our bodies, and it is there for a reason. No sense in constantly trying to shave it when your character should be focusing more on survival. So, as “scary” as it is, yes, body hair will eventually come back. This also goes for beard hair as well.

Exception(s):
•Your character has a disease that has literally prevented their body from growing any hair, such as alopecia. However, with this particular disease, this usually means ALL hair; this includes head hair, armpit hair, arm and leg hair, eyebrows, genital hair, etc. If your character has alopecia as an excuse to not have leg, pit, or genital hair, but still has head hair and facial hair growing, that is a problem
•If your character manages to find scissors, a razor, or another sharp object. Some might still be concerned over hair growth and would attempt to remove it, however, don’t expect your character will come out with a clean shave. Without proper preparation like shaving cream—which I don’t see being highly-accessible in this world—the razor will leave behind lots of abrasions and highly-irritated skin. The open wounds could lead to infections. If your character is still desperate enough to remove body hair, the most painless way I’d suggest would be with scissors. Again though, do not expect a clean job

10. Everyone is Sexy

Speaking of parts on the body, never should I see your character have a “sexy” body type and be well-fed all the time, have no scars or no missing body parts, or anything else that isn’t negative on their body. Make your character hungry or malnourished, give your character some scars from a deadly scuffle (or if your character is just a klutz like yours truly), or anything else that could happen to them. Make it look like your character has been busting their ass to survive in this environment. There are no all-you-can-eat buffets to feed them and there are no methods they can use to retain their “sexy” figure. Giving your character a perfect as well as perfectly healthy figure is unrealistic.

Exception(s):
•I see none for this

11. Taking Pets:

I love pets as much as the next person, but let’s be real here: I don’t see the majority of pets surviving in this situation. Your character would need to care for them in the same manner they’d have to care for a little kid: feeding them, making sure they don’t get sick, watching them to make sure they don’t run off, and so on. In addition, an animal can’t forage for food and bring things back to camp or warn you to stay away from an area everyone’s been talking about, or assist you in long-ranged fighting. With the last situation, I imagine the animal becoming spooked and hiding or end up running away in fear, before either getting shot or your character never sees it again. Again, I love animals, and I can understand why people would want to take them along, but I personally see them as a liability since your character would have to care for both themselves and the animal(s) in question.

Exception(s):
•The animal is specifically bred for hunting or protection. This easily excludes dog breeds like poodles, pomeranians, and maltese dogs, and animals like rodents, rabbits, domestic birds, reptiles, fish, amphibians, and more
•The animal survived prior street exposure. This would help the animal survive much more easily than an animal who has lived in comfort its entire life

12. Community Goers vs. Lone Wolf

One thing I never understood in many forms of post-apocalyptic fiction is the need to kill every single person you see. News flash: working in groups actually tends to turn out much better than mercilessly killing passerby humans. Now, say someone presents the argument that high mistrust will be a thing, but think about this: how did prehistoric humans succeed and thrive? By forming groups. It is not a written, required rule that you need to be skeptical of (and eventually kill) every single human being you come across. Now, I am more biased towards forming a community, but I will list the pros and cons I find with each of these.

Living In a Community:
•Pros: With a large group of people, you have a large set of skills. One person can help trap animals, while another can forage, and someone else can help maintain the home base, and so on. In addition, you will have more back-up in a fight, and emotional support can be there as well. Plus, living in a community allows opportunities for farming, which is much more stable than trying to constantly forage for cans of food left over from past times. While loners are relying on finding animals or scrounging for cans of food, you and your group can live off of what you have reaped and sowed.

•Cons: Relying on other people, ‘nuff said. This can cause stress if one person in the group leeches off the efforts of everyone else. In addition, backstabbing can occur and infighting may also become a thing. Finally, if one part of the group falls, then without proper leadership, the rest of the group will fall as well.

Living Solitary:
•Pros: You have to worry about yourself, and only yourself. You don’t need to babysit or worry if someone else is going to return home. Everything in your home base is set up with how you want things to be set up—you don’t have to get, pfft, group consensus. Plus, you have everything to yourself: food, medicine, shelter, ammo, you name it.

•Cons: You’re the only one there. If something goes wrong, you’re the only one who can fix it. If you’re hurt, no one can care for you but yourself. If you’re surrounded, you have no back-up. In the event of farming, you’re also the only one who has to keep track of the crops. Lastly, humans are social creatures by nature, so prolonged separation society can eventually lead to a form of paranoia and after quite a while, insanity.

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That’s all I’ve got for this guide. I had fun writing it, and I hope it can assist with creating more realistic characters for this genre. Remember though, this is based on opinion; if you don’t agree with me, that's fine! As I mentioned in the beginning, feel free to put down your opinions or other cliches you’ve seen and if you think there can be exceptions to them. Thanks for reading!