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Posted 10 years agoIt feels good to finally have a concrete fursona. It only took me close to 30 years.. HAHAHA
Meh.
Posted 13 years agoI'm rather frustrated with my lack of identity.
When it isn't so cold and wet outside.. I think it would be healthy to take a day to relax somewhere.. woodsy. ... I think my soul is decaying.. that's the best way to describe the feeling.
When it isn't so cold and wet outside.. I think it would be healthy to take a day to relax somewhere.. woodsy. ... I think my soul is decaying.. that's the best way to describe the feeling.
My name is Bond. Citrus Bond.
Posted 14 years agoI'm still in a fair share of pain, but I figure.. if I'm having trouble sleeping, I may as well at least attempt to tell you all this wild adventure.. I'm dead serious. This is the kind of shit that you would expect in an action movie.
Events take place the night of the 12th, and the morning of the 13th.
So, I went to a going away party for my friend Ben, who is gonna be moving to (undisclosed location) to try and get away from the drugs (primarily heroin). The party was in his basement, I go down there, dish out a couple hugs to people I know, grunt in disappointment that the hot chick didn't show up (go figure, FML).. and then I noticed my friend Dan laying on Benjie's bed. I thought he was passed out drunk for a second, until he started making these HHHHHHHHH, HHHHHH, HHHHHH... sounds, really loud.. it was on and off. I was asking what happened and apparently he had taken some heroin and went unconscious. They had brought him down the basement stairs when he was turning blue, tossed him on Ben's bed and his head hit the cement wall with a sickening crack.
This was maybe the 2nd time I knowingly encountered someone on heroin, but the only other time i've ever seen it, was years and years ago, some guy was smacked out sitting in a chair at my party, nodding out.. this was.. something much more frightening.
I was concerned, but the few people who fuck w/ the drug kept saying he was fine.. I left briefly with Matt to pick up beer, being I really couldn't handle drinking hard alcohol that night. Got back, drank a brew, we put an empty bottle of Dead Man's Ale in Dan's hand.. half to be hilarious assholes, half to try and trick the mind into thinking his state was induced by drinking.
Charlotte and Michelle eventually convinced Benjie that we needed to take Dan to a hospital, so a bunch of people helped carry him up the stairs and outside to KT's pickup truck. .. I couldn't let KT take him by herself, I climbed in and sat in the middle, holding him up the whole way to the hospital. He was out cold, his jaw slightly agape, i didn't really think to wear my seatbelt cuz I was a little more concerned about keeping Dan upright and rested on me, lightly slapping his face every now and then to try and wake him.
Then Chaz started blowing up my phone about his stupid shoe. Apparently, someone put one of his ridiculously expensive shoes on Dan's foot, and he's all screaming for me to check his foot when.. i really couldn't being i'm trying to hold an unconscious person in a fucking pickup truck. I hung up w/ him a couple times after being like.... dude, what the fuck, i really can't check right now. what the fuck.. lol
We make a wrong turn but eventually find our way (you'd think it'd be easy as pie being the hospital is right by my house). Took the wrong part through the hospital and KT ended up going into oncoming traffic to turn into the correct part.. lol
Pulling up quick to the emergency side, KT gets out of the car, we're about ready to try and take him out when he starts to wake up. He went STIFF and that alone scared the piss out of me. A security guard came over with a wheelchair and we all made effort to sit him down, get his legs up and what-not. I saw the one shoe on his foot and knew it was Chaz's, but it was on there pretty damn good and I didn't think taking it off of him was exactly the top priority. We get him in, they start taking him in back and he stands up out of the wheelchair and tries to walk out.. the look on his face, red-eyed, almost teary, he looked so terrified.. We had him sit back down and they took him back there.
Charlotte and Matt drove behind us, and we chit-chatted in the waiting room for some time.. started making jokes about a certain tv show that we totally need to make. Charlotte went back w/ him eventually and retrieved the shoe, letting us know he got some meds in his system, he was sorta talking but having trouble hearing. We waited for a little while.
Got an update on the party - it had been moved to Michelle's house, and only certain people were invited (AKA: no heroin addicts other than benjie allowed). We had Landon drive Matt's SUV to come get him and I from the hospital, KT drove home, and we left Charlotte there with Dan and asked her to let us know how he was doing.
I texted Chaz and asked if he wanted to come w/ to Michelle's, he said he's going home (my house, being he's been crashing on the couch). I'm like ahhh.. cmon, don't be like that. We stopped at my place and I go drop off the shoe to him, and tells me not to go.. that he has a bad feeling. I just thought he was being paranoid..
The Alberts and I thus pick up cigarettes and then drive to Michelle's, to where we drink beer while watching Michelle and Landon play some crazy resident evil game based in Africa or some shit like that. There were maybe 7 of us there total, just bullshitting and doing what friends do. We send Pablo upstairs to take a nap cuz that guy was freakin' wasted. (he was laying his head on my lap and meowing, lol it was adorable). I got to play with this gorgeous parrot named Nicky (green with red under the wings, some blue thrown in there, orange eyes).. He was somewhat talkative for a bird that's just met me. I was rather entranced by him for awhile.. so was Landon. lol Gotta teach that parrot how to sing free bird!
Benjie, Matt, Landon and I.. we're chilling in the garage, talkin.. about things that have happened between us and around us, or even how we've changed through the years.. and we've all managed to be friends despite the crazy bullshit that's happened between us (like Matt drunkenly going down on me when I was a junior and puking all over my thighs.. UGGGGHHH). Just.. one of those moments where you're happy to have the people in your life that you do, and they can love you despite the dumb shit that happens.
Then it's about 5:00 AM. Michelle is tired and .. well, it was obvious she wanted us to leave - she said if we were too drunk to drive we could crash there, but her mom was gonna bitch her out in the morning and she'd rather that not happen.. so.. well.. what could we do? We grabbed the cooler full of empty beer cans (and apparently the last bit of a bottle of jeiger, and some uv blue we didn't know stupid individuals left in the fucking cooler) and left (after Matt kept telling Michelle that if we stayed he wouldn't mind talking to her mom about how we needed the place to sleep and what-not).. backed out of the driveway, and the car goes over a huge-ass pile of snow in front of the neighbors house. The guys get out and push the car out.. I'm thinking, well that was scary, but big deal, that happens to people even when they're sober, and other than each of us having a dead man ale (well i had two) we'd been drinking nothing but piss-water beer that night.. what could go wrong?
Leaving the subdivision, Matt's just.. driving like a twat. Speeds past a stop sign and we're like.. dude.. what the fuck.. why the hell are you driving like that? Knock it off! .. well.. he did, he drove safely.. till he got into my subdivision.
Halfway down Bluebird, he starts gunning it. We're like.. dude, stop it, slow down, what the fuck are you doing? Benjie was screaming at him. I know i at least said it once or twice out loud, at least I think.. I know my mind ran back to the time Kera got in a car accident in my subdivision, and then joey being partially decapitated by going through a house.. then I said out loud "I have friends who died this way" (even though only one person has that I know).. the turn was coming, sitting behind the driver I could just.. see it approaching swiftly, and I knew we weren't gonna make it. My left hand shot up to cover the side of my head/face.. and..
CRUSHING IMPACT
Everything looked like a strobe light. I remember my head bashed against the door or window at least a couple times, but i thankfully did have my hand up to try and cushion the blows.
I'm not sure if I blacked out or not..
I then realized I was hanging upside down by my seatbelt.
Panic washed over me, and i'm not sure if I was actually talking out loud or just thinking, but i kept going LET ME OUT LET ME OUT LET ME OUT LET ME OUT LET ME OUT (did i mention i'm claustrophobic?) and fumbling with the button on the seatbelt till it let me go, and I fell to the ceiling. I saw my beaver hat starring up at me, so I grabbed it.. then I could hear Matt calling our names outside the car.. I had to will myself to crawl between the front seats and out the open front door.. I was irrational and scared that i'd get stuck between the seats somehow.. crawled out of the car, through the snow a little till I had the room to stand.. and I think I just kept walking till I was out of the yard and could look.. the car was most definitely overturned, but it was also dark so.. couldn't see much other than the fact that we were ungodly close to going into a house. Matt then checked on me real quick, I reached up for my glasses to realize they were missing, and then saw a blood smear on my head.. told me I was bleeding but it wasn't bad. We banged on these people's door but they didn't answer.. rather, the neighbors opened their garage and saw us, the man was either a cop, or a retired cop.. very nice guy. Called 911 for us cuz I was so frazzled I didn't even know if I had my phone on me or not.. I smoked cigarettes with a nice older woman in the garage, who confirmed that yes, I was bleeding from the face a little but it was just a few tiny scratches.. my hand really hurt, but I could move my fingers..
The cops got there.. lots of time, and a fire truck, an ambulence or two.. we told them everyone was out of the car, asked who was driving, yadda yadda.. then they started telling Landon to move his hand, and that's when I realized he was bleeding pretty bad from the side of his face.. some of it was around his mouth, all over his pants.. Officers walked Matt and Landon over to the ambulance eventually and Ben and I were awkwardly standing in the drive way.
One of the officers.. was a dick. He recognized Benjie, and said.. "I know you, you're that guy who left that overdosing girl in the snow to die a couple weeks ago.. not calling 911 until she was already dead.." ... he said a lot more, I can't remember, I was just shocked at what that prick was saying to my friend (who by the way, was with her the whole time..)... then he looked at the two of us and said, word for fucking word, "It's always the good ones that die". My jaw dropped at this. We just crawled our fucking way out of a flipped car and he had the audacity to say that. I spoke up, what little I could.. I said, "You're wrong.. we all die.."
He didn't respond to that. He probably realized in that moment how much of an insensitive prick he is. At least I hope so.
A fire-fighter was talking to me, but I don't quite remember what he was saying. I told him to change his tone of voice, because he was intimidating me.. then he shined a light in my face for a good little while, trying to determine what sort of state I was in, I guess, assess injuries, determine if i'm in shock, on something, idk. He didnt' sound as aggressive after i told him to cool it.
Benjie and I signed forms saying we didn't want the ambulance to take us to the hospital.. i had to sign 2 forms, being i got blood on the first one from one of my fingers.. couple of my fingers were bleeding. Then we walked a little over a block to my house.. I updated my facebook status.. smoked a few cigarettes and woke up jenni and bob to ask if i should go to the hospital.. which I did.
When I got there, we saw Matt, who was quite apologetic and saying how stupid he was. I told him "It's okay.. all my friends are stupid". Eventually checked in on Landon (more like peeked in) who was getting stitches down the hall. Christ his pants were bloody. When they eventually left, I told Landon to keep those pants for a zombie movie.
Doctors did 2 xrays and 2 scans on me, turns out i just have a badly sprained left thumb and some bruises. I'm really thankful my hand took the brunt of the hit rather than my head. 7 hours in the fucking hospital just to find out I have a sprain.. better safe than sorry.
But yes.. we're all okay. Landon only needed a couple stitches, Matt and Ben were fine.. we're all just really really sore, and well, i'm a little traumatized but at least i'm not shaking like I was the first day. Thing is i've only gotten a total of 10 hours of sleep so far.. it's hard to sleep, because I keep relaying it in my mind before I fall asleep, and i'm so tender all over that it's hard to get comfortable..
.. we're all alive, though. That's what matters. We all could have easily died.. My parents took me to Dennys after I got out of the hospital, and when I finally saw food.. I was so happy, so fucking happy. The waitress asked if we needed anything else and I just let out the creepiest, craziest laugh ever.. i think I scared her.. told her i'm sorry, i was just.. so happy. I've never been that happy to see a patty melt and seasoned fries.
And.. yup.. that's my story. I'm really sore, really tired..wondering if more uuber tiny pieces of glass are gonna push out of my skin like one did the other night. I keep forgetting to ice myself.
My friend Kevin made me cookies and brought them over yesterday.. I'm so glad. It made my V-day so much brighter.
Hopefully I'll be seeing JoElle for at least an hour or two today before she has to go to work.. I just want to be held..
Events take place the night of the 12th, and the morning of the 13th.
So, I went to a going away party for my friend Ben, who is gonna be moving to (undisclosed location) to try and get away from the drugs (primarily heroin). The party was in his basement, I go down there, dish out a couple hugs to people I know, grunt in disappointment that the hot chick didn't show up (go figure, FML).. and then I noticed my friend Dan laying on Benjie's bed. I thought he was passed out drunk for a second, until he started making these HHHHHHHHH, HHHHHH, HHHHHH... sounds, really loud.. it was on and off. I was asking what happened and apparently he had taken some heroin and went unconscious. They had brought him down the basement stairs when he was turning blue, tossed him on Ben's bed and his head hit the cement wall with a sickening crack.
This was maybe the 2nd time I knowingly encountered someone on heroin, but the only other time i've ever seen it, was years and years ago, some guy was smacked out sitting in a chair at my party, nodding out.. this was.. something much more frightening.
I was concerned, but the few people who fuck w/ the drug kept saying he was fine.. I left briefly with Matt to pick up beer, being I really couldn't handle drinking hard alcohol that night. Got back, drank a brew, we put an empty bottle of Dead Man's Ale in Dan's hand.. half to be hilarious assholes, half to try and trick the mind into thinking his state was induced by drinking.
Charlotte and Michelle eventually convinced Benjie that we needed to take Dan to a hospital, so a bunch of people helped carry him up the stairs and outside to KT's pickup truck. .. I couldn't let KT take him by herself, I climbed in and sat in the middle, holding him up the whole way to the hospital. He was out cold, his jaw slightly agape, i didn't really think to wear my seatbelt cuz I was a little more concerned about keeping Dan upright and rested on me, lightly slapping his face every now and then to try and wake him.
Then Chaz started blowing up my phone about his stupid shoe. Apparently, someone put one of his ridiculously expensive shoes on Dan's foot, and he's all screaming for me to check his foot when.. i really couldn't being i'm trying to hold an unconscious person in a fucking pickup truck. I hung up w/ him a couple times after being like.... dude, what the fuck, i really can't check right now. what the fuck.. lol
We make a wrong turn but eventually find our way (you'd think it'd be easy as pie being the hospital is right by my house). Took the wrong part through the hospital and KT ended up going into oncoming traffic to turn into the correct part.. lol
Pulling up quick to the emergency side, KT gets out of the car, we're about ready to try and take him out when he starts to wake up. He went STIFF and that alone scared the piss out of me. A security guard came over with a wheelchair and we all made effort to sit him down, get his legs up and what-not. I saw the one shoe on his foot and knew it was Chaz's, but it was on there pretty damn good and I didn't think taking it off of him was exactly the top priority. We get him in, they start taking him in back and he stands up out of the wheelchair and tries to walk out.. the look on his face, red-eyed, almost teary, he looked so terrified.. We had him sit back down and they took him back there.
Charlotte and Matt drove behind us, and we chit-chatted in the waiting room for some time.. started making jokes about a certain tv show that we totally need to make. Charlotte went back w/ him eventually and retrieved the shoe, letting us know he got some meds in his system, he was sorta talking but having trouble hearing. We waited for a little while.
Got an update on the party - it had been moved to Michelle's house, and only certain people were invited (AKA: no heroin addicts other than benjie allowed). We had Landon drive Matt's SUV to come get him and I from the hospital, KT drove home, and we left Charlotte there with Dan and asked her to let us know how he was doing.
I texted Chaz and asked if he wanted to come w/ to Michelle's, he said he's going home (my house, being he's been crashing on the couch). I'm like ahhh.. cmon, don't be like that. We stopped at my place and I go drop off the shoe to him, and tells me not to go.. that he has a bad feeling. I just thought he was being paranoid..
The Alberts and I thus pick up cigarettes and then drive to Michelle's, to where we drink beer while watching Michelle and Landon play some crazy resident evil game based in Africa or some shit like that. There were maybe 7 of us there total, just bullshitting and doing what friends do. We send Pablo upstairs to take a nap cuz that guy was freakin' wasted. (he was laying his head on my lap and meowing, lol it was adorable). I got to play with this gorgeous parrot named Nicky (green with red under the wings, some blue thrown in there, orange eyes).. He was somewhat talkative for a bird that's just met me. I was rather entranced by him for awhile.. so was Landon. lol Gotta teach that parrot how to sing free bird!
Benjie, Matt, Landon and I.. we're chilling in the garage, talkin.. about things that have happened between us and around us, or even how we've changed through the years.. and we've all managed to be friends despite the crazy bullshit that's happened between us (like Matt drunkenly going down on me when I was a junior and puking all over my thighs.. UGGGGHHH). Just.. one of those moments where you're happy to have the people in your life that you do, and they can love you despite the dumb shit that happens.
Then it's about 5:00 AM. Michelle is tired and .. well, it was obvious she wanted us to leave - she said if we were too drunk to drive we could crash there, but her mom was gonna bitch her out in the morning and she'd rather that not happen.. so.. well.. what could we do? We grabbed the cooler full of empty beer cans (and apparently the last bit of a bottle of jeiger, and some uv blue we didn't know stupid individuals left in the fucking cooler) and left (after Matt kept telling Michelle that if we stayed he wouldn't mind talking to her mom about how we needed the place to sleep and what-not).. backed out of the driveway, and the car goes over a huge-ass pile of snow in front of the neighbors house. The guys get out and push the car out.. I'm thinking, well that was scary, but big deal, that happens to people even when they're sober, and other than each of us having a dead man ale (well i had two) we'd been drinking nothing but piss-water beer that night.. what could go wrong?
Leaving the subdivision, Matt's just.. driving like a twat. Speeds past a stop sign and we're like.. dude.. what the fuck.. why the hell are you driving like that? Knock it off! .. well.. he did, he drove safely.. till he got into my subdivision.
Halfway down Bluebird, he starts gunning it. We're like.. dude, stop it, slow down, what the fuck are you doing? Benjie was screaming at him. I know i at least said it once or twice out loud, at least I think.. I know my mind ran back to the time Kera got in a car accident in my subdivision, and then joey being partially decapitated by going through a house.. then I said out loud "I have friends who died this way" (even though only one person has that I know).. the turn was coming, sitting behind the driver I could just.. see it approaching swiftly, and I knew we weren't gonna make it. My left hand shot up to cover the side of my head/face.. and..
CRUSHING IMPACT
Everything looked like a strobe light. I remember my head bashed against the door or window at least a couple times, but i thankfully did have my hand up to try and cushion the blows.
I'm not sure if I blacked out or not..
I then realized I was hanging upside down by my seatbelt.
Panic washed over me, and i'm not sure if I was actually talking out loud or just thinking, but i kept going LET ME OUT LET ME OUT LET ME OUT LET ME OUT LET ME OUT (did i mention i'm claustrophobic?) and fumbling with the button on the seatbelt till it let me go, and I fell to the ceiling. I saw my beaver hat starring up at me, so I grabbed it.. then I could hear Matt calling our names outside the car.. I had to will myself to crawl between the front seats and out the open front door.. I was irrational and scared that i'd get stuck between the seats somehow.. crawled out of the car, through the snow a little till I had the room to stand.. and I think I just kept walking till I was out of the yard and could look.. the car was most definitely overturned, but it was also dark so.. couldn't see much other than the fact that we were ungodly close to going into a house. Matt then checked on me real quick, I reached up for my glasses to realize they were missing, and then saw a blood smear on my head.. told me I was bleeding but it wasn't bad. We banged on these people's door but they didn't answer.. rather, the neighbors opened their garage and saw us, the man was either a cop, or a retired cop.. very nice guy. Called 911 for us cuz I was so frazzled I didn't even know if I had my phone on me or not.. I smoked cigarettes with a nice older woman in the garage, who confirmed that yes, I was bleeding from the face a little but it was just a few tiny scratches.. my hand really hurt, but I could move my fingers..
The cops got there.. lots of time, and a fire truck, an ambulence or two.. we told them everyone was out of the car, asked who was driving, yadda yadda.. then they started telling Landon to move his hand, and that's when I realized he was bleeding pretty bad from the side of his face.. some of it was around his mouth, all over his pants.. Officers walked Matt and Landon over to the ambulance eventually and Ben and I were awkwardly standing in the drive way.
One of the officers.. was a dick. He recognized Benjie, and said.. "I know you, you're that guy who left that overdosing girl in the snow to die a couple weeks ago.. not calling 911 until she was already dead.." ... he said a lot more, I can't remember, I was just shocked at what that prick was saying to my friend (who by the way, was with her the whole time..)... then he looked at the two of us and said, word for fucking word, "It's always the good ones that die". My jaw dropped at this. We just crawled our fucking way out of a flipped car and he had the audacity to say that. I spoke up, what little I could.. I said, "You're wrong.. we all die.."
He didn't respond to that. He probably realized in that moment how much of an insensitive prick he is. At least I hope so.
A fire-fighter was talking to me, but I don't quite remember what he was saying. I told him to change his tone of voice, because he was intimidating me.. then he shined a light in my face for a good little while, trying to determine what sort of state I was in, I guess, assess injuries, determine if i'm in shock, on something, idk. He didnt' sound as aggressive after i told him to cool it.
Benjie and I signed forms saying we didn't want the ambulance to take us to the hospital.. i had to sign 2 forms, being i got blood on the first one from one of my fingers.. couple of my fingers were bleeding. Then we walked a little over a block to my house.. I updated my facebook status.. smoked a few cigarettes and woke up jenni and bob to ask if i should go to the hospital.. which I did.
When I got there, we saw Matt, who was quite apologetic and saying how stupid he was. I told him "It's okay.. all my friends are stupid". Eventually checked in on Landon (more like peeked in) who was getting stitches down the hall. Christ his pants were bloody. When they eventually left, I told Landon to keep those pants for a zombie movie.
Doctors did 2 xrays and 2 scans on me, turns out i just have a badly sprained left thumb and some bruises. I'm really thankful my hand took the brunt of the hit rather than my head. 7 hours in the fucking hospital just to find out I have a sprain.. better safe than sorry.
But yes.. we're all okay. Landon only needed a couple stitches, Matt and Ben were fine.. we're all just really really sore, and well, i'm a little traumatized but at least i'm not shaking like I was the first day. Thing is i've only gotten a total of 10 hours of sleep so far.. it's hard to sleep, because I keep relaying it in my mind before I fall asleep, and i'm so tender all over that it's hard to get comfortable..
.. we're all alive, though. That's what matters. We all could have easily died.. My parents took me to Dennys after I got out of the hospital, and when I finally saw food.. I was so happy, so fucking happy. The waitress asked if we needed anything else and I just let out the creepiest, craziest laugh ever.. i think I scared her.. told her i'm sorry, i was just.. so happy. I've never been that happy to see a patty melt and seasoned fries.
And.. yup.. that's my story. I'm really sore, really tired..wondering if more uuber tiny pieces of glass are gonna push out of my skin like one did the other night. I keep forgetting to ice myself.
My friend Kevin made me cookies and brought them over yesterday.. I'm so glad. It made my V-day so much brighter.
Hopefully I'll be seeing JoElle for at least an hour or two today before she has to go to work.. I just want to be held..
What am I?
Posted 14 years agostill trying to figure out my furry self.
iris is a winged wolf, i know iris already. i need to know me..
i suppose my main connections are to wolves + dogs. I'm also fond of hyenas, foxes, maned wolves, snow leopards, rats ...even spiders, in a weird way. Feathers have always appealed to me as well, red-tailed hawks, crows.. heh, i remember walking home from school one day, and I had to pee pretty bad about halfway through my journey.. trying to trudge through snow. This crow followed me, jumping from tree to tree.. it was odd. I keep walking and.. fall face-first into a pile o' snow. The crow LAUGHED at me. LAUGHED. I SHIT YOU NOT. little bastard. I'm glad I didn't piss myself. xD
I like throwing bugs into spider webs.. I used to save them from the stomping feet of choir girls. I usually kill them when I see them in the house.. maybe.. okay.. i've let some live by the window, but they're gone now.. I kill the spiders in the house 75-80% of the time. I can't squish them all. =(
There's always been a connection between myself and canines. My dog that I grew up with was a german shep / lab mix. I spent a lot of my childhood imitating her, putting my food on the floor and eating next to her, laying on the floor by her. I always was a bit feral.. I'd bite my sister frequently. I found milk bones strangely appealing. I'd probably still eat one if offered to me. e_e I've mimicked them so well it's become a part of my existence. I always found myself howling when i'd hear a howl - sometimes i'd how just for the fuck of it - i'm sure most of those baptist kids knew that I was/am a bit off my rocker. I like to be pet, and enjoy lounging around.. i'm protective (maybe even sometimes just a little bit overprotective) and generally loyal. I used to lick people in the face rather frequently.. xD
Sometimes I feel like a skunk, a reflection of my passive-aggressive ways even my low self-esteem. Plus female skunks tend to lay low with a den full of other females in the winter.. that totally sounds like me. lmao
Maned wolves.. well, I love their manes, and the fact that their piss smells like marijuana. lol..
When I'd eat cheetos, i'd be a beaver, or a mouse/rat. I've owned 12 pet rats, plus my friend had a ridiculous amount of pet rats when we were kids. (we'd race them up the stairs: it was awesomesauce). I liked gnawing all the cheese off the puffy cheetos.. i still do sometimes. xD I have a weird tendency to eat crackers and other such similar edible objects it a rodent-like fashion.
Hyenas.. total scavenger, granted so is the rat, and the skunk.. but i love their laughs. I have a weird habit of laughing sometimes as a reaction to.. things i shouldn't even laugh about. Like the time my mom punched me in the back, or just.. random. My laughter can/has scare(d) people. I also have a tendency to bite, and I leave a nasty bite.. hyenas do the same. :3 Plus they were my favorite in the lion king!
Also.. the spots. I kinda want to incorporate the scars of my skin condition and make it look beautiful. I think that'd be rad, maybe give myself some confidence. =P Maybe.
The fox.. I like their sleek look, and generally seem to fancy fox furries. Idk why! I don't think I could actually be a fox, though.. I just think they're too.. small of a canine? Idk. Just doesn't feel right when I say "i'm a fox"
I forgot to add bunnies to this list.. I make a fun bunny. kinda plays off of how.. shy/meek I can be, as hard as that may be for some of you to believe. My tendency to run from what threatens me.. maybe i'll just have to have a character that's a rabbit.. if not.. then just.. use it meshed with something else. One of my best friend's nicknames is Bunny, I think she's a bit more bunny than I am.. in that cute, wiggle your nose and be adorable kind of way.
Maybe i'm just some weird clusterfuck creature of what-the-fuck-is-that-ness.
iris is a winged wolf, i know iris already. i need to know me..
i suppose my main connections are to wolves + dogs. I'm also fond of hyenas, foxes, maned wolves, snow leopards, rats ...even spiders, in a weird way. Feathers have always appealed to me as well, red-tailed hawks, crows.. heh, i remember walking home from school one day, and I had to pee pretty bad about halfway through my journey.. trying to trudge through snow. This crow followed me, jumping from tree to tree.. it was odd. I keep walking and.. fall face-first into a pile o' snow. The crow LAUGHED at me. LAUGHED. I SHIT YOU NOT. little bastard. I'm glad I didn't piss myself. xD
I like throwing bugs into spider webs.. I used to save them from the stomping feet of choir girls. I usually kill them when I see them in the house.. maybe.. okay.. i've let some live by the window, but they're gone now.. I kill the spiders in the house 75-80% of the time. I can't squish them all. =(
There's always been a connection between myself and canines. My dog that I grew up with was a german shep / lab mix. I spent a lot of my childhood imitating her, putting my food on the floor and eating next to her, laying on the floor by her. I always was a bit feral.. I'd bite my sister frequently. I found milk bones strangely appealing. I'd probably still eat one if offered to me. e_e I've mimicked them so well it's become a part of my existence. I always found myself howling when i'd hear a howl - sometimes i'd how just for the fuck of it - i'm sure most of those baptist kids knew that I was/am a bit off my rocker. I like to be pet, and enjoy lounging around.. i'm protective (maybe even sometimes just a little bit overprotective) and generally loyal. I used to lick people in the face rather frequently.. xD
Sometimes I feel like a skunk, a reflection of my passive-aggressive ways even my low self-esteem. Plus female skunks tend to lay low with a den full of other females in the winter.. that totally sounds like me. lmao
Maned wolves.. well, I love their manes, and the fact that their piss smells like marijuana. lol..
When I'd eat cheetos, i'd be a beaver, or a mouse/rat. I've owned 12 pet rats, plus my friend had a ridiculous amount of pet rats when we were kids. (we'd race them up the stairs: it was awesomesauce). I liked gnawing all the cheese off the puffy cheetos.. i still do sometimes. xD I have a weird tendency to eat crackers and other such similar edible objects it a rodent-like fashion.
Hyenas.. total scavenger, granted so is the rat, and the skunk.. but i love their laughs. I have a weird habit of laughing sometimes as a reaction to.. things i shouldn't even laugh about. Like the time my mom punched me in the back, or just.. random. My laughter can/has scare(d) people. I also have a tendency to bite, and I leave a nasty bite.. hyenas do the same. :3 Plus they were my favorite in the lion king!
Also.. the spots. I kinda want to incorporate the scars of my skin condition and make it look beautiful. I think that'd be rad, maybe give myself some confidence. =P Maybe.
The fox.. I like their sleek look, and generally seem to fancy fox furries. Idk why! I don't think I could actually be a fox, though.. I just think they're too.. small of a canine? Idk. Just doesn't feel right when I say "i'm a fox"
I forgot to add bunnies to this list.. I make a fun bunny. kinda plays off of how.. shy/meek I can be, as hard as that may be for some of you to believe. My tendency to run from what threatens me.. maybe i'll just have to have a character that's a rabbit.. if not.. then just.. use it meshed with something else. One of my best friend's nicknames is Bunny, I think she's a bit more bunny than I am.. in that cute, wiggle your nose and be adorable kind of way.
Maybe i'm just some weird clusterfuck creature of what-the-fuck-is-that-ness.
