Thanks to Google for making an awesome [FREE] program in which I can type things and update remotely!

You may notice that the long line of user icons that was my commission queue is gone from my user page. However, do not fret! It has been replaced by an even more awesome commission queue in list form which has been created using Google Docs. This list will be updated at least twice per week [if there are any changes to make anyways].

Alright, now that that's set up, it's back to work! ^(._.)^ Progress and updates soon guys, I promise!

The holidays were certainly hectic (as they always are) and I'm still working to get through this last crazy weekend in order to be totally done with them. I'm sorry for people waiting on commission progress, as I have had very little time to sit at the computer and work between running around to family and friends and working longer hours at work. The latter unfortunately will be a permanent feature.

The corporation that I work for has changed the way they divy up hours due to the new health care laws. Part time employees can only work 25 hours a week (when they normally were working 30-35). On the other hand, full time workers, like myself, are encouraged to work longer days to fill in the gaps in shifts because I guess our managers get yelled at less about overtime than they get yelled at for part timers going over 25. Anyways, it's made for some 50-55 hour weeks for myself...which does not leave one feeling energetic about working on much of anything once I'm home.

So, here's hoping that that will change eventually. In the meantime, I'm stuck working my normal 8 hour shift today...and then I'll be coming back in tonight to work from 9-2am to try and get some things done without customers in the building. All of this wouldn't be as much of an issue of course if I didn't have to be back up at 7am to prepare for leaving around 9am for northern VA to knock out the last session of Christmas with friends. And of course Sunday is filled with family activities too...

So, again, my apologies about the delay. But hopefully after this last shitty 72 hours, I should be able to get back on track and get everyone updates. When I have time here soon, I'll be sending out notes to all my commissioners, letting them know on a more personal level where their commissions stand in the completion process and, in some instances, making sure that people still want their commissions.

My apologies to anyone waiting on commissions. I honestly haven't had the chance to open my laptop once this entire week. Every day has just been awash with craziness at work and quite frankly, I'm drained and disgusted with people right now. I understand that people are stressed. There's only a week and a half till Christmas and I have multiple families to cater to...so believe me, I'm stressed too. And the last thing I want or need right now is people unloading their holiday stress on me by belittling my intelligence or arguing over the most menial things (like aisle numbers...which was a true situation from earlier this week).

I don't feel creative...I mostly just feel tired. Which any artist can tell you is not a great time to work on anything...

Anyways, I'm not just writing this all to bitch. I wanted to let everyone know that I will be out of town this weekend, visiting family. The holidays are rough on getting stuff done. Anyone who has ties to family and is traveling to see them over the next couple weeks can relate to that. So, all I'm asking for is an ounce of patience from everyone. I'll be back on Sunday and I'll do the best I can to finish some more pieces between then and the following weekend. From Christmas Eve till the following Sunday, you can expect not to see or hear anything from me though...as I'll be tied up with family stuff.

Thank you in advance to anyone who takes the time to read this and good luck with your own holiday travels/gatherings.

Black Friday has been defeated for another year! And here I sit, licking my wounds. Or rather...just trying to stay awake...

Spent the earlier part of the week out of town visiting family [as so many others, I'm sure]. But had to return to VA early yesterday to deal with the first round of holiday bullshit. Was at work from 5 PM till 11...then went home briefly and attempted to sleep. I honestly had been hoping to stay awake, but the splitting headache that I had developed over the course of 6 short hours, was begging otherwise. Not sure how much I actually DID sleep, as it was very difficult to fall asleep and even after doing so, I found that I kept waking up off and on.

Finally got up at 3:45 AM and dragged through the typical morning routine [albeit a couple hours earlier than normal]. We reopened at 6 AM, for a grand total of 2 people that were waiting in the parking lot. Business did eventually pick up and remained steady [though not as crazy as it's been in the past] throughout the day. Was so thankful to finally be done with it at 2 PM though...

Anyways, only reason I write all this is to let everyone know what's been going on for the last couple days. And to explain that while I may not be super productive this evening...I'll be working on commissions through the weekend and you'll likely see some updates from me starting at the beginning of next week [if not sooner].

* Also, it's not super important, but I think I finally nailed what I'd like to use as my signature/watermark. [It's also my new icon for now]. So, everyone can expect to see that on my pieces from now on and know that it's me. ^(._.)^

First of of all, hello and welcome to all my new watchers! Was quite a pleasant surprise to wake up to all those notices in my inbox this morning. ^(._.)^

That having been said, I appreciate that someone brought to my attention that the info on my main user page was conflicting with my recent posts. So, I went ahead and fixed that this morning...and for good measure figured I would post a journal as well just to clarify. I -am- open for commissions right now!

However, the only commission type I am currently accepting is the "quickie commissions". If you would like to see an example of that commission type, please check out the two latest posts in my gallery! These are only $10 a piece right now and a great option if you want a full body picture of a single character, without breaking the bank.

If you're interesting in claiming a slot, please feel free to note me! Thanks for reading!

Sorry to everyone about the little hiatus of silence. This time of year always gets hectic between work and family. I'm not writing this to offer excuses, but more so to provide an explanation for those who are waiting on commission work or happen to care.

First of all, a part of me is a realist/defeatist and realizes that maybe 10% of the people who watch me, will read this. And maybe half of that again, will care about what I say here. And that thought alone is perhaps the biggest reason behind my recent silence. When you start out, it only makes sense when no one takes notice of you or your work at first. Then, when watchers start to add up, it's nice to feel appreciated and supported.

Having the Patreon thing flop really took the wind out of my sails. I kept looking at other artists and going , "Wow, even if I got a fifth of the people who watch me to throw in $2 a month, that'd be a big help towards bills". And again, I totally understand that -everyone- has bills of their own and can't afford to chip in money towards a million different people through Patreon. But to only ever reach a following of 5 people, max...that doesn't make you feel great about your work, or yourself as a person. So, I'm going to give up on that for now and go back to focusing on commissions and personal stuff.

And I apologize if this is starting to sound like me throwing a pity party. Again, this is more just me trying to work through some of these emotions and offer an explanation of where things stand. Because right now I find myself coming home from work, tired and sore, and returning to this disappointment from Patreon and the general sense that my work isn't really worth any attention. That I should just apologize to all my commissioners and not sign back on again. And please don't take that to mean that I'm threatening to disappear if hundreds of people don't reassure me otherwise and beg me to stay. I'm not that vain...

If anything, this is likely some untreated form of depression that I need to get better about fighting. So, I guess the point to all this is just...please be patient with me...

I agreed to go with one of my managers today to help out another store in their last minute preparations for inventory. We decided to meet at a place near where I live and drive together to this store in Charlottesville. Given that it was supposed to rain all day (and my husband and I share a vehicle)...I decided I would walk the short distance to the meeting place and leave the car for him.

it was definitely raining (but not pouring down in buckets or anything). With less than 10 minutes left in the walk, I was crossing an opening to a side street when the glow of headlights illuminated my path. I didn't even turn my head. I was already almost across the opening (which was big enough for 2 cars). Assuming that the person could see me, given that the street was lined with street lamps and I was in a giant, poofy jacket...I figured that the car would either wait for me or pull in to the ample space that I had already passed.

First of all, the "car" was an SUV...and you can imagine my surprise when in the next few seconds I found myself on my side in a puddle.

It felt like I'd been punched in the gut, but I was quick to get back on my feet. The man did stop and get out and apologized over and over again. He seemed even more shook up than me and though it felt like such a surreal situation, I found myself trying to reassure him that everything was ok as he drove me the rest of the way to where my manager was picking me up.

It may just be some dumb part of my nature...but I got in my manager's car and went with him to go work for 8 hours at this other store. I still feel sore and tired from the events of the day...but all in all, I think things will be fine. I however do not recommend the experience and hope not to repeat it again.

Nobody will likely read this or care, but I've been doing some thinking about this Patreon thing. Haven't really had the turn out that I had initially hoped for. But, I understand that more and more artists are joining in all the time, and there's only so many things one can throw their money at.

Still, the two pieces a month that I offer leaves little time for working on commissions or anything else besides. And, just going off the response to my most recent upload and some prior experiences, I get the sense that no one is really all that bothered about the whole thing. Which again, is fine...it's a learning experience for me, is all.

So, I'm not saying that I'm getting rid of my account or anything. However, I am going to downgrade what I offer just a little bit to try and allow more time for other things. Also, I have some thoughts for a new project that will tie in to Patreon...but won't require a monthly subscription and everyone can participate! More on that later though...hoping to be able to launch that some time in early Sept.

Anyways, again, I'm sure very few will take the time to read this journal. But, I felt the need to share my thoughts anyways. I'll link my patrons to this journal and invite everybody to change or cancel their subscription as need be. Thanks as always for your support!

More info about the changes can be found here: http://www.patreon.com/clockwork-caribou

You know that feeling when you're working on a commission...but you're feeling kind of sleepy and thinking about going to bed... But then, fucking Eye of the Tiger comes on, on the radio. And you're like...no...we can't stop here.

Not now...

Not EVER.

So...without divulging what I have in the works, I have a question for those who watch me. If you were to follow the epic adventures/exploits of a warrior [could be male/female/whatever] through a strange and wild land...what species would you be interested in seeing?

Just curious. ^(._.)^;

My apologies for the string of silent days. >(._.)< This week has just been absolutely insane...

I will detail what happened below, for any who may be interested/care. Or for commissioners who are likely wondering if any progress has been made on their pieces. The short version is, I haven't really touched the computer for 3 days...but, I'm back now and getting right back to work.

So, the work week started on last Sunday for me. A "late night" shift as one of my managers calls it [simply because you're not staying the whole night...just most of it]. I worked from 6PM to 4AM and then went home and slept/did some other errands and things before going back in to work again that night at 9pm. That's the shitty thing about working overnights when you're normally a day/early morning person. I don't really find that I sleep will during the day and there's always plenty of domestic tasks [ie. grocery shopping, mowing the lawn, vacuuming] that tend to eat up your precious free time in between shifts. Anyways, all that to say, I worked another overnight Tues night into Wed morning. Got home around 7:30AM and proceeded to do the normal morning routine of feeding the cats, doing dishes, litter boxes, etc.
When I finally made it to the bedroom to try and get some sleep, I found my husband sprawled out sideways across the bed...soooo, I turned right back around to go sleep on a couch instead. Unfortunately, starting Monday evening, I had had that nasty, creeping "blah" feeling that precedes a cold and by Tuesday night, I had the "raw, fiery stinging every time you swallow - this is totally going to suck" full on start of a head cold. Laying on the couch, I had a really difficult time falling asleep and kept getting brought back awake again and again by whatever the cats were doing. What broken sleep I was getting was interrupted around 10AM, when my husband came in and woke me up rambling something about his appendix...something about feeling pain around midnight and that now he felt better and that meant it might rupture...so, he was going to ER immediately.
After having worked 10 hours straight and then only getting maybe less than an hour of sleep total, none of this was making much sense to me. But I heard the thing about the ER and immediately felt the urgency to go with him, with or without sleep. I really REALLY should have gone with him. And if I had had maybe two more minutes to get myself more coherent, I would have. But, by the time I was ready, he was already out the door and on his way to the hospital...alone...and with our only car. I was torn and didn't really know what I should do. However, at this point nothing had been confirmed on what was causing him this distress...so, in the end [though I know it sounds cold], I went to the bedroom and slept.
2 hours later, I woke to a text from him saying that he was sitting in the ER with my sister-in-law and that they were just getting ready to admit him to the hospital, as it had been confirmed that his appendix did indeed need to be removed. Threw myself out of bed and did what little bit of tidying up I could do to not look like a total crazy person...then I headed out the door and started walking. The hospital is probably less than a 10 minute drive from us. In the heat of midday + Wednesday afternoon traffic, it took me about 20 minutes to make it to the ER. Made it to his room just minutes before the nurse came in and admitted him and they assigned him a room for recovery and began scheduling surgery. This all had happened so fast and I was so concerned for him that he was being thrown from what had otherwise been a very hum-drum, normal week...to suddenly needing emergency surgery.
Anyways, long story short, I stayed at the hospital from 12PM till 9:30PM that night, doing the best I could in between to make conversation with family members who came and went [all the while being very aware that I was sleep deprived and not very entertaining/alert]. Was highly tempted to stay overnight with him, but the nurse asked me to leave at 9:30, as he was in a shared room and there was a chance that he would get a roommate at some point.
Oh, and the other crappy thing about this whole situation is that after Wed, I was no longer on overnight shifts. So, Thurs morning I had to wake up at my normal 5:30AM and head in to work again. It'd felt so strange and lonely the night before not having my husband at home and I spent much of the night worrying about him and what the following day would bring when the hospital released him to go home. I'm so thankful that one of our close friends was able to pick him up from the hospital and bring him home...as I was stuck at work with another lovely 10 hour shift breaking down truck. Still very sick and still very very sleep deprived.
Friday was another 10 hour shift + my head cold finally stole my voice. The irony being that I felt like complete and utter crap on Thursday, but sounded fine, so no one cared. And then come Friday, I was actually feeling a bit better, but sounded weak and pathetic, so all day everyone kept asking how I was feeling and checking in on me periodically. Anyways the important thing is that my husband is home again and seems to be recovering well. The surgery for removing something like an appendix has thankfully changed over the years and has become as non-invasive as possible. He only has 3 little cuts on his abdomen, which appear to be healing up nicely and causing him less and less pain each day. Everyone at work has been so amazed that he was able to pin-point that it was his appendix...essentially with nothing more than poking and prodding at his stomach + Web MD. However it happened, I'm glad that it's over now and that he's home safe and well.

Thanks to anyone who takes the time to read this. Again, I'm back now and feeling a bit more rested [though still fighting off this cold and mentally trying to prepare for another month of overnight shifts starting next week]. Ready to get back to drawing! ^(._.)^

~Rajani M

Posting this as a journal as well just in case anyone sees this and not my most recent upload. ^(._.)^;

I realize that not everyone has the $$$ to get all the commissions they may like. And I also feel lately like all I really work on are commissions. And that's great! Believe me, I'm thrilled that people want work from me. ^(._.)^ But an artist also likes to be creative on their own.

So, I thought I would remedy both of these things in starting an account on Patreon. For those who are unfamiliar with the site, it's a spot on the web where people can support the artwork/music/what have you, that they enjoy [with $]. Please do not worry, I'm not making Patreon an exclusive thing! All of the artwork that I upload there will also be available on my FA and SoFurry accounts.

However, if you DO decide to become a patron, you'll benefit in two ways!

New content will be generated twice per month! For each $1 a patron pledges, their name will be entered into a raffle. On the 10th of each month I will chose a patron at random and they will win a free bust image of a character of their choosing [this can be a character of your own creation, a character you have permission to use, or a Rule 34 kind of a thing]. This image can range from tame to NSFW in content and the pose/background of the piece is entirely up the raffle winner. [Note: Once you have been chosen as the winner for this raffle, there will be a 3 month waiting period before your name can be entered into the raffle again...just for fairness sake.] By the 15th of the month your bust image will be completed and be posted to Patreon for all to view in high-def!

- On the 20th of each month, my patrons will be provided with a survey for an upcoming image. I will be polling for information on what my patrons would like to see in the next piece I post! These surveys will range in theme, but will generally include things like gender, species, kink, etc. I will then take the results from the survey and produce an image to post by the 25th of the month.

So, please think it over. Realistically, you can partake in this branch of my artwork for as little as $2 a month. And if you chose to do so, you have a chance every month to win some free artwork and offer input in general on what you'd like to see me create next. Regardless, I appreciate you taking the time to look into my work and as always, I truly appreciate the support! ^(._.)^ <3

I woke up this morning to a billion new watchers out of no where. Not really sure what drew you all in...but I'm glad to have ya watching!

Thanks. ^(._.)^

Got the laptop all setup with Photoshop/commission files again. Tablet is reinstalled etc etc. So, in other words...I'm ready to get back to work.

My apologies to everyone who is waiting on commissions or...just wants to see more art. Will have some progress coming soon, I assure you!

Won't be too much longer this morning and we'll be packing the remaining items and hitting the road for Jersey and the Steampunk World's Fair! Got a rainy start to the day...but that won't slow us down much. Going to be eatiing dinner tonight with Steam Powered Giraffe and I am just beyond excited. Can we be there now...like...seriously?

Anyways, Jersey here I come!

My tech at work was able to retrieve the data from the dead hard drive in my laptop. So, hurray for not losing precious original files/commission progress!

The laptop now has a new hard drive and a fresh Windows 7 reinstall. Supposed to get it back from the tech tomorrow at work. My husband should be able to get a good deal of programs reinstalled that evening (including the oh so necessary Photoshop).

Much of Friday will be spent on the road for this aforementioned trip to Jersey. With any luck though, I'm still hoping to have a good amount of time to finally get back to work on commissions again between Friday-Monday. Still going to have to do something to raise money to cover the trip (since I lost all this time to the laptop being dead)...but for now, I'm just glad it'll live for another couple months/years. And my credit card will just have to cover this weekend for now. Hurray for debt! ^(._.)^ Being an adult with responsibilities and expenses is SO awesome!

So...somewhere between Saturday morning when I was able to sneak in a little time to work on commissions and Sunday evening when I got home from my parent's place...the laptop that my husband and I share, decided to become a brick. Doesn't make it past the boot sequence, no matter how many different ways we've tried...

At best, a friend of ours might have a Windows disk that could be used to restore the machine. At worst, it's completely toast and I have to figure out how to get a new laptop. Either way, I'm going to lose all of the artwork that was stored on the machine...

This...really couldn't have happened at a worse time. But I guess that's the only time that things like this crop up. Anyways, I'm working on a solution...

...