Okay....
After I got things fixed up in other areas with you know who.
I'm now grounded for 2 weeks. So no internet until Saturdays.

Reason: Low grades , I have to drop a class, I'm stressed, and spending too much time online --;

So now I have to find a weekend job. Save up and try to get myself back in order.

So I won't get back on until Saturdays or regain my trust until April when school is almost done.

I know this sucks, as if I didn't feel bad enough, lately I'm being called my dad --;

So I'll be on Saturday, or just hanging around the library looking through the classifieds

aka...this sucks

FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKK!!

fuck you! fuck him, fuck her, fuck this chair, fuck the internet, fuck life, fuck this serious feeling in my gut, fuck my brain being clouded, fuck the burger in the toliet I just puked, FUCK FUCK FUCK! Fuck my restless night, Fuck WoW, Fuck College, Fuck my insanity, FUck my sanity, fuck responisblity, fuck being lazy, fuck the Damn Furry report I have to do for tomorrow, fuck my drawings, fuck my gallery work, fuck my art, fuck RP, fuck OC, fuck my hair, FUCK THIS ENTIRE WORLD AND IT'S UNFAIR METHODS OF LOGIC AND EMOTIONS!

DX< FUCK FUCK FUCK, FUCK ME LIKE A FUCK, DOn"T STOP THE FUCKING FUCK, HIT ME ONE MORE FUCK! FUCK IT IN FUCKERTOWN! DADDY FUCK, MOMMY FUCK, GRANDPA FUCK! DOGGIE STYLE FUCK, MISSIONARY FUCK, ANAL FUCK! FUCK IT ALL TO HELL!!!

FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKK!!

*passes out *

alright working on a request for ...I'll check their name later, give me a text if you need me

OC's are open, I feel like drawing, and I'm very happy that Perry finally got a brain and left me alone for good ^^

I get like this when I feel like I can't do shit.
If I can't fix it, of course I might as well break it.
I could make you better or worse, depends if I see fit.
Right now, I just have the urge to destroy.....
I try to be positive, yet I can't control it!
and WHAT WORLD PEOPLE! I had a world, but that was gone! Long ago! My stories were gone! My feeling to give you people art was gone! Yet I only get credit when I share it with someone else!

I can't make them smile, so cut that look off their face!
ask me...why so Serious Dalon.....
BECAUSE I AM SERIOUS! I can't be funny or happy with out some asswipe making me upset!

I can't draw my characters because people get jealous! Those details and great stories are gone and replaced with nothing!
I wanted to make it better, not worse.....

I'm no better...no....I'm worse then the people I judged.

I have power and will, but at what cost.....

You all know that underneath that tough exterior front you like to put up, there’s a soft (and almost sissy-like) side to you. And I don’t care what you people say, it will most definitely show when you’re watching a certain movie. It’s true. Either it’s happened to you or someone you know.
The point of this whole thing is to let us know your soft side. Once you’ve been tagged, you have to list every movie that’s ever made you cry (or at least brought you close to tears). And I mean -every time-! It never fails.
If you like, you can also state what part of the movie made you feel that way. Why is also optional. :D
After you’re done, you have to tag at least 5 people to this after you. Even tag the one that tagged you (which I have no idea why on earth you people do that).

I don't remeber all of them, but here are the ones that came to mind:

1.) A.I. at the end

2.) Balto 2; Wolf Quest: When he seperates with his daugther at the end (sorry if I spoiled it ^^; )

3,) Lion King 1 and a half: When Timon and Pumba were raising Simba

4.) Lion King: When Mufasa dies (did i spell his name right? 9,9)

5.) I am Legend: Death of the dog (WHO WOULDN"T CRY!)

6.) Homeward Bound; BOTH MOvIES! (almost near all the parts!)

Nothing got done, everyone is upset and cranky, I've been alone all day 0,o
yet I got alot of stuff done on WoW but then I feel like I need to work on something but forgot. I just have a weird gut feeling. Then alot of stuff started changing.... it just feels...weird.

Too much work to be done, hun left me a thank you card and ran away. I ain't single but meh, as long as she's happy and okay. I took a test, for being an angel or devil, I got human. Yet so many signs that I feel god is telling me it's time again. Well god has a weird taste for doing things but he's the big man of the world so let his word be done.

As for me *ripes up the card* I got a future to build. Lata

Making some changes, also removing IMVU from my computer, fixing my page and a new avi. Please avoid the yelling in the back, everyone is in a bad mood over here. Guess I'm the only one keeping my chin up, although I wish it didn't make my stomach full with stress --,
My computer is still indiposed because I can't wipe it from my half uncle having the cd to do so. I feel like drawing and need to study and do some prints. I also have a request to do so please bare with me. After dealing with shit on IMVU and Red Moon issues, I need to focus away from those two until it clears up. Chat is up, don;t care come ask. Lata

Got up, heard the yelling, mother throwing a fit about all kinds of stuff. Dealing with stuff around me and my sister. Complaining how much she has done for us , yet making us feel like we did nothing right or calling us unhealthy or lazy. When farther back she tells us not to worry or she can handle it. She makes me feel so emotional or make start questioning shit! I'm in a really emotional state, happens alot that I have to get away from the house. I don't know if it's about her stress, her new jo, past moments of my farther and her mother abusing her. I love my mom, she's always caring giving and supportive. Yet it feels like she hardly gets anything in return by everyone, including me and my sibs. It just drains the happy mood into a serious state. Hell, she can't remeber much after being in two car wrecks and a concussion. Yet she looks at me and tells me how much shit I do wrong. I would like to tell her how much she made mistakes too but I can't! She's my mother. Even though I'm 19, I live under her roof. I try to get a job, but then I be using her blazer. She took my college money for bills and shit! She goes drinkign and smoking at times too to get her mind off of shit. Hell she hates relationships so much because of all kinds of bull shit. She feels like the world is against her. I can't help her or make her feel positive, because she always looks for an excuse to make things negative. I don't know what to do. She even compared me to my dad....that hurt. That hurts me so much. She brings back painful memories to make me feel like shit. As if I wanted to really leave college or say that I'm too skinny for my height. I've had issues and nervous systems ever since I was little. Now , she tried to take over my art for my gallery opening saying we should work together. Then tries to take all the credit for everything. As if I didn't know shit, and she knew everything! So why is everything in this house falling apart emotionally. I envy my brothers for moving out, at least they had someone who would look out for them. I'm on my own once I leave, and when that comes to it. I be glad, yet I feel like I was trying to run away from her.

*sigh* my room computer got a virus, from some hacker called EbonyLeopard, and it completely ruined my computer spyware and tried to steal my passwords, that fucking douce bag. I have to wait for my brother to come tomorrow at least, while I have to burn some documents on a CD. I won't be able to get on AIM or a few things, so I'll be on MSN here at times. It'll only be for a day or two. Other then that it sucks. --;
Note this virus could be contagious so anyone check your system to be safe

I got something in mind
so bare with me

Yes folks I got a tablet and an OC system ^w^
I still do my other stuff but I'm gonna mess aroudn with this while I'm in college. My scedule will be packed between 10-5 Monday-Thursday, but I can get stuff situated. If anyone wants to OC with me Please leave me a note. Note, I don't know how to same mine that well --;
But we can still work something out if I'm not doing it with my hun ^^;;;

Take Care

*sigh* well I'm doing okay so far.
I'm on a cheap hippie version for a mood pill --;
I feel fine, yet I'm trying to gain weight so I'm doing a therapy list of what I eat, so far it's just water and protien with vitamen pills. As for the job, well how am I suppose to get an application when I'm stuck at home. I need to lay low too or just draw a bit. Yet I still feel gasy --p. *burps* not to mention going to different places to keep my mind busy or thinking a way to get some money to save. I might start commission work too. I'll set up a list when I get Paypal set. So don't worry I'm doing fine.

Look, I'm stressed out for a lot of reason, but I'm not gonna complain about them. The woman I love is feeling hurt because of this, so I'm gonna be offline for a while. I've been jobless for a year living with my family with little money from college, I may lose that if I don't shape up. Also I'm tired of dealing with how I look and eat. I'm skinnier then a toothpick and been alseep for two days!
I'm going to get a massage, get a hair cut , get a job that helps! Buy a car and insurance save up. Continue college. And get my appetite back. This last holiday sucked, but everyone does! I love this woman  kuroshasta if you can please try to help her be strong. That's the least you can do for me. Give her encouragement, show her some care. She's a wonderful person. Now if you excuse me, I need to fix myself for a new year. and Hopefully I get to see it turn it up right.

For all my viewers and to friends of those I ask for a favor
The person I love the most needs help!
She is doing commissions and yet she is feeling down this year. SO I ask of you to please commission her, she is a great artist, and a wonderful person. <3

Please help a wolf out
for his love and for happy New Year
http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/530027/

I love this person so very much
yet we are so far away
I don't want a box full of words
I want hugs and kisses to give
I offer her money and all the support
yet she rather suffer because of her pride
I try to give her freedom and understand
yet she doesn't want hurt me behind those doors
I would do anything to be with this gal
Yet she tells me she's not worth it , drained to the bone
I've seen her suffer for years, and it's killing me inside
All I want is for to be happy
I don't care if she is full of lust
I know she loves me, and that's all it takes to set me up
She's not weak , she's strong
She's talented and mistreated by all
She's not worthless, she's priceless
THis comes from a guy with hardly any caring feelings
The only thing that keeps us so far away
Is the distance and the lands we live in
The friends and familys we know and care
Our urges that tear us apart in dispair
Those times we spend together, it had some meaning

so I pray, please help her, and give us strength, I love this woman too much to see her go away. just give me a sign of hope, this is not of out desperation, this is for us and the furture I want to build by then

Still lazy , but pasted over the frost fever.

Aniwno art trades are still up, enjoying the holiday
trying to do shit and meh --p

the question is what to do for this week

I'm really warm at the moment, and I do not wish to provoke anything. I feel like something is wrong or can't seem to get my mind out of the gutter. It doesn't feel good right now. I feel like I'm sick, and when I get near someone, I give it to them in a way.
SO please leave me be. I wish for once to handle it alone.

Okay I wasn't a big fan of sonic stuff --;

he was good in the first show I've watched when I was young. got a little carried away with the new stuff

,,,,,and now...I see Sonic...turn into a werehog --;

He's on my shitlist! and so is the basterd who came up with that idea X<

reason why I say this is because I'm consider a werewolf at heart, and sonic crossed the line!

to wake up to Wraith of the Lich King for WoW

DO NOT DISTURB!!!

My deathknight will rise to destory the world!

Well, the girl I was seeing on IMVU , real life too, one time date. --p WEll get this! I broke with her rival. Yes, apparently, My girl was well, she got into a clinical depression , went to the hospital where her aunt died a month later. And her heard about us dating , and she got jealous like the whore I hear she would be. Pretend to be her, and well it went pretty weird. She bought me a gift and left two long ass messages. With a phone number that didn't even resemble her old one. So after a few days, when I try to talk to her, She wasn't the same at all, no comments, no actions, nothing. She dressed up differently into something I never saw. I when today I saw someone, leave me a message when I was trying to do an OC, and yes I was completely alone when this happen. Talk to her sister, as she told me everything on the phone, and then I said I wanted proof. Next thing I get a message from Alicia, but it was really the fraud bragging how she said we broke up! But really the reason why I broke up was because, I was unhappy, because I felt I couldn't do anything. What I had with her was something special, yet she's goign through issues that I can't even describe. Not to mention my life is a mess at this point. So I called her, talk to her and her sister, left a message for the fraud telling her to go fuck herself. As then I told her sister and Alicia, how I felt and we stayed friends.

I always fall for the difficult women though, but meh, I'm not complaining, it's everybody else who keeps getting in our way. So right now , I feel like drawing some Marvel, and grabbing a root beer before I go to class tomorrow. and make up my work. I'm used to it, and that's why I'm good at fixing it.
So good night everyone, need someone to talk to, give me a call.

Yesterday was a great day for me, now it's in the middle. THe guy I called for the comic artist position hasn't called me back or write to me when I sent him the pics. If it was a con, he's gonna get his ass sued. Because I also gave him pics I did for other people >:3
Also Dealing with my friend here, which she has completely gone insane! She went on her ex's computer to get proof, lied to the girl he cheated on with her, and got naked pics just to make a point! She knew he already was cheating yet she keeps on saying "I'm breaking up with him face to face" Yet what realllly got me ticked was taht the fact that she told me she was anti-depressions....Unfucking believable. I nearly laughed my ass off afterwards thinking how much she is going through what I dealt from her in 2006~! Yet they told me to take them, and I didn't , yet I've been feeling fine! I have a wonderful life. Yet she screws hers over and over again. No matter what I do, no matter I say, she just doesn't get to even have the decent idea of it all. Because she's all doped up on happy pills! I'm just gonna let her fuck up her life again, sit back , and watch some transformers re-runs. Because I'm the only one with a working brain here. ^w^
Also , I'm still taking request or trades if anyone is interested. I'll also be busy tomorrow for Iron Man and Laser tag at my SAA meeting. GOod night and hope everyoen learns a lesson from this

It's a miracle
Okay, today I spent my time at the Career Center, where I went around looking. All I saw was a bunch of business of gases and insurance, also police force, and Marines and teachers. --p
Until I cam across the radio and the manager was so nice to me :3 She gave me her card about how I can get my other work sold or public. UNTIL, get this. My friend Anatony , which was his birthday tells me. That someone has opened a new comic business IN TOWN! AND!! they are looking for comic book artist! I rushed to Paper Heroes to see the ad and there it was! I called the number and talked to the guy and boom! he told me to send him some of my stuff online or in person. But...one thing I called him twice about the email address...I keep forgeting his first name on the email , my phone is a peace of shit! Afriad to call him back not to sound rude. I gave him mine but don't know if he would email me back. AND ALSO...I don't know what to show him X,x
I've got tons of stuff , I can adapt to any still I work with many angles and colors! Computer compatible! AND YET I DON"T KNOW IF IT'S A DREAM COME TRUE OR JUST A CON!
MY MIND IS ON THE VERGE OF GOING INSANE! MY DREAM IS STARTING TO BLOOM! AND I DON"T WANT IT TO WITHER AWAY! the inhumanity! AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH *head explodes*
So I'll just call him again and send him my best stuff. Dalon is coming TO THE BUSINESS BABY!

today was an off day for me, I managed to draw somethign for once, gonna post it tomorrow, yet there were things that bugged me.
Like how I want to post my real stories on here, but too afraid that they can never be shown the way I want them to be.
My Fa grandson and his Fa dad are getting on my nerves like always , I'm seeing old friends who don't wish to talk to me in real life , except for Drake, wishing I could get out more to find a job and stuff.
Yet what really worries me the most is between my two best friends here. After I return, I saw problems bewteen the two. A couple so tight in love and had a baby boy. Now that the boy is gone, the two fight and show signs of a break up.
Hearing from both sides, and being a friend , it worries and pains me to see this. And over soemthing really stupid on how they got mad over it, or how it seems one is cheating ont he other. As I think these two were madly in love at first, and now seeing it fade away bit by bit, hoping it would return again. That was when I saw what true love was, until they let themselves mess up in many ways.
From what my best friend told me, love is something you share with to past away the hard times with, yet even though you can't be together doesn't mean you can try fora new future. Howerer, she was never really a responisble or commitful person to be honest. Still, you just got to look in a positive tone and not let stupidy get to you.
And last but not least, upon my restless night, I've dreamt of change for both good and bad, featuring a clock with a peaches, the sound of a silver whistle , and tears of a crowd.
Fall is a good to play, yet winter only brings a cold embrace of pain and work. Especially near the holidays.
Good night , and see you lata on.

yes I got my home computer running
which mean I got my messengers up,
and that means I can draw again
so I'm doing an art trade as we speak :3
and I'm doing the VG-cat thing and doing something a week --p

See ya'll online! lata