This is Kimmy,  firefly8083, Damnevildog's sis.

It is with great regret that I must inform you in such an informal manor, but Damnevildog, DeD, Puppy, has passed away. As you all probably know, his health has not been good these past few months, and today He was found in his home unresponsive. When the Ambulance arrived to take him to the hospital they declared him deceased.

I am so sorry if this in any way seems informal, but I do this per his request, He never wanted anyone to be unaware in the event of his death.

I plan to have his account immortalized. His best friend  wrathofzod and myself are currently working to preserve all of his artwork, traditional and digital, per Ded's request.

We are also wanting to do donations for his brother to help cover the unexpected expenses of Ded's passing. We want to help him cover the cost of cremation and to purchase an urn for his ashes.
If you would like to help, please contact me,  firefly8083 and I will provide the paypal account.

Thankfully he is no longer in pain, and he will live forever in our hearts.

We love you Bubba

Most people know why, but I feel the need to explain a bit for people who may not know.

I am a wreck because of medical issues, brother is mostly ignoring me which is putting me in more jeopardy.

Right now (and has been going on for awhile) I am really tired and it feels like at random I will just start hurting really bad out of no where (it happened last night) not sure if that means my Kidneys are dead or what, but that is what I am living with and can't take anymore meds because the doctors won't let me for the fact that since my kidneys don't work it would be bad cause that stuff will build up in my body.

So that is where I am at and that is the reasons why I am not online as much and commissions are slow.

Also... I may seem more clingy and prone to hugging, I get this stupid notion in my head that I don't have a lot of time left and want to be more expressive, so if it seems like I am getting more lovey it is because of that, I want to hug everyone I am close to even if the person feels weirded out by it, so if it bothers you please let me know.

That is it, thank you for reading and hopefully understanding, I wish you all the best *hugs* <3

Last week I had an appointment at the hospital, they want to get me setup for a minor surgery to expand a vain in my left arm.

It is for dialyses, I will have to go three times a week, I guess it is not the worst thing that anyone can go through, but it's pretty scary to me.

They also changed one of my medications, so now I take Lisinopril two times a day instead of one,

Which leads to my rant, my brother, I asked him to go to the store some days ago, he said we would go tomorrow, tomorrow came and he just hid in his room, Monday was scary cause my Blood Sugar was low, I had to contact my best friend  Wrathofzod to come down and take me to the store to get food, pop tarts and to pick up my medication, I was really bad off that day, the whole time I was with  WrathofZod I was in a daze, barley remembered he was there, it was scary.

Today I needed to go to the hospital to check to see if the medication I was taking was not making things worse, noon when I got up my brother was gone, checked a little awhile ago and he was on his computer, I used the restroom and asked if we could go up... he responded in aggravation with "how long is that gonna take?"

I just told him never mind and now I am in here and really depressed.

I have had to think about an offer that my sis  firefly8083 gave me, when she gets a new house I would be invited to move in and live with them... sadly I think the guilt of leaving my brother alone would be too much, so I will just stay, will probably shorten my life cause I can't get the help I need from my brother.

What ever happens I at least have  WrathofZod here, if anything happens to me he will make sure to let the people I care about online know if something happens.

Want to close with that even with all the hardships and stress dealing with people turning on me or trolling or what ever, being here and meeting all the people was worth it, I love the people that care about me, you guys kept me going on when I thought that I had no strength to.

Love you guys *hugs* thanks for reading>

Been down and out because of the cold, spend too much to e sleeping again... And ever since last weekend my teeth (what is left of them that is) hurt really bad, so that is why I have only streamed Monday.

Will try to be back at it soon, got two x-rated commissions to do so I might just finish them offline cause I don't want to offend anyone x3

That is it for me, just an update to let people know what is going on, thanks for reading *hugs*

Well I me an Xbox One and PS4 (thanks to my fave fast food place Taco Bell <3)

So I am wanting to be able to game with people more, my public XBL/PSN is DamnEvilDog :D

More to the point of this journal is I want to game with people, was thinking about buying some stuff on which ever console, but not sure what to get.

Right now there is a sale for Destiny on PS4, all the DLC that is out plus the main game for $39,59... problem is I felt kinda burned by getting the game on launch for full price and having so little content :c is there anything else anyone is playing? I prefer more co-op stuff.

Also been thinking about having segmented "Game Time" on the weekends to setup a opportunity to game with people (maybe even stream the games when I play) if anyone is interested.

Anyhoo that is it, guess I will look over the sales on both consoles and see if there is anything I want, thanks for reading *hugs*

Hey guys, sorry I have not been around, been really sick feeling (well more then usual) spent most of the last I dunno how long sleeping. starting to feel better-ish so I figured I would post a journal as to why I have not been around ^^;

Things have been so crappy for me that I ended up sleeping most of the last 3 days (got up a bit yesterday and today to eat Thanksgiving foods and cookies my brother made) and that was about it ._.;;

Played some games, but I just wanted to fall asleep instead of game (so I know I am not doing well when I don't want to game >u>)

Still open for commissions btw, I have one I owe and I am really sorry I just sort of disappeared, but it was out of my control.

So if anyone wants a commission let me know, I am down to like $3... besides the one up there I owe I have one I finished days ago and need to upload (will do soon)

Thanks for reading and I hope your holiday went better then mine *hugs* ^^

Like normal I am opening up for commissions, turn around time is slow cause of my health, but I will do my best ^^

http://www.furaffinity.net/view/15951444/

That is my price sheet, I can do other things, if you want to know just ask!

These are no/low input wing it commissions like always, hope some of you are interested ^^

Thanks for reading *hugs*

Got the console a bit over 3 hours ago... lol I am still tired and almost falling asleep while being kinda bored on the thing >u>

I have console number 4808 of 6500 (it's on a neat plastic gold colored card) x3

Uncharted looks pretty neat (it's a bit weird with having 60FPS, but I'll get use to it)

I just have the Uncharted collection and the two free games downloaded (gonna delete them, have all of the WD games and Magica 2 is... eh?)

Was wondering if anyone wanted to get a commission? I take pp like normal or now PSN cards or Xbox cards (so I can buy games x3) mostly looking for PSN stuff since I have very little to play on the PS4 right now, would even take game codes at their store value.

That is it, not much else to say, you can add my public account: DamnEvilDog, but like I said, got nothing to play online yet xD

Thanks for reading ^^

Not sure what is up with me, but I have been really tired for the last 3-4 days.

Been sleeping enough and yet still not feeling rested, I sit at my work PC and slowly pick at my only commission only to give up and go back to bed and pray I can stay awake long enough to eat and poke at Fallout 4 >>;

So that is what is up. will try to stream this week sometime, but who knows.

Just a status update, thanks for reading and hope you all are doing well *hugs* ^^

http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/7168919/

My dear friend  TawnySweet is in need of help, she needs fund to feed her self, husband and her little one, would you please check the link to see if you are interested in her lovely work?

If not could you please spread the news? thanks so much *hugs* <3

I have had too many painful things happen to me over the years, too many heart breaks, too many mental scars that cause me to think less of me self, so I am done letting people into my heart from now on, no more falling in love ever again.

I can't take it, I can't take it when I know it will just end badly, and with my blood pressure being horrible as it is if I get too much stress I could die from a heart attack or something.... or maybe just kill my self, so done with that.

Also, have stated in the past, but gonna say it again, I AM NOT ADDING ANYONE TO SKYPE! I don't want to be randomly added, will just block people, will ignore anyone who asks to be added in chat, I sound like a jerk for that probably, but I just game when I am not streaming, not really worth your time, trust me.

Also don't add me to Facebook unless I know who you are, gonna just ignore every time.

Finally if you hear bad things about me you can believe them if you like, trust me, no one hates me more then me... but if you still want to be my friend I would be very thankful and blessed cause I know I don't deserve the people that still stick around even though I am such a broken idiot mess.

That is all I wanted to say, just really hurt right now, don't need sympathy, I just need to type stuff out or it stays in my head and does more damage.

Thanks for reading *hugs*

Stuff keeps happening to me, I can't handle it anymore, any bit of stress and I can hear the god damn thumping of my blood pressure in my head, like a never ending drum beat.

I don't understand why people even bother with me, I keep telling people about my issues the mental, the physical and all that jazz and yet people get upset about it and get upset when I don't agree with them.

I am sorry to everyone that had to deal with me, I don't want to hurt anyone but I am tired of biting my tongue about things, so just gonna say this, I wish all I am friends with and that I have cared for in the past-tense well, and I mean that, I want you to have a good long life with good luck... again sorry that I am me, but I don't know how else to be.

Gonna end with that I am not gonna stream for awhile, gonna slowly poke at my commissions offline, I may be around on Skype but my mood will be blah... not that is much different then I normally am.

Thanks for reading, I wish you all no matter who you are the best *hugs*

EDIT: just want to add that every one has a bias to them, I don't want to talk about what brought this on cause people will take my side without knowing fully what went on, I do consider my self more objective then most, but still everyone has an opinion, if I don't agree with someones opinion then the issue should be dropped, not brought up again and again to the point to where I am right now, crying and having the pounding in my head, that is all I ask.

http://www.furaffinity.net/view/15951444/

Taking commissions cause I have very little money at the moment.

Price guide is there, taking no/low input commissions, please post below if you are interested and I will reply back to you if I feel I can draw the character.

If you would like to tip or donate that would be appreciated damnevildog[at]gmail.com

Thanks for reading and hope interest.

Not that it means much since I don't talk to people much while on there.

No reason for this other then I am scared to hurt more people and feel like hiding.

I will stream here and there cause I need money but that is about it.

Not sure why people want to be my friend anyway, just ask anyone who got tired of me and is not my friend anymore.

Talk to some of you in stream, thanks for reading and sorry.

Week has been really crappy till today, best friend wanted to hang out ( wrathofzod) took me over to Gamestop so I can get Dragon Age: Inquisition GOTY (we share games so he gets to play the DLC too from my account) then he went and got food for his family and we headed to Taco Bell.

We sat down and decided to watch Jurassic World (good movie!) but a bit before the movie I enter the code I got from when I buy the Quesarito big box like I have been getting for a long time (love the Quesaritos!) I entered the code wrong and it said sorry it was ether invalid or used, so I try again and then boom... You are a winner!

So in maybe about two months I will be the owner of a gold PS4, looking forward to getting it... though it is gonna be a long time before games come out that I want (mostly Star Ocean) but it is free and that is amazing! ^^

I guess sometimes I get good things that happen to me, I wish it would happen more often ^^;

That is all I had, just needed to share and to say people really win those things, maybe you should get some Taco Bell xD

Thanks for reading ^^

Just to let people know that I had felt sick Tuesday so I felt off after sleeping over 10 hours yesterday.

Last night I had issues (I kept getting up to use the restroom so I had the OPPOSITE problems so I slept very little.

So I am gonna be lame again and just chill today... again -_- I don't feel horrible or anything, just too tired and sort of shivering (it's cold) I am gonna try and get back to work tomorrow.

Thanks for everyone who commissioned me and sorry for the dely, will do my best to get back on trask asap ^^

Thanks for reading :3

EDIT: Well I know why I had issues, did not realize I was out of hydralazine, so the last few days make a bit more sense, got my refill today (first day my brother has been off)

It's an important med, here is a link to what it does:

http://www.drugs.com/cdi/hydralazine.html

Basically I really need these meds xD;;

Gonna be taking joint commissions with my friend  TawnySweet!

We decided to do Halloween type commissions, so I will be doing the arts and she will be coloring :D

All you need to do is post what character you like and we can ether do Creepy icons like these:

http://www.furaffinity.net/view/17808879/ and http://www.furaffinity.net/view/17760132/ for $30

Or if you like creepy chibi's like these:

http://www.furaffinity.net/view/14861799/ and http://www.furaffinity.net/view/14862739/ for $35

The chibi's I posted are meme but also CREEPY XD

If you are interested in getting some freaky arts for next month please post below :3

A friend of mine just lost her job, I wanted to refund the money she used to commission me but I did not have much left, so I am opening up for some commissions to try to help her.

If interested please post below, also will be having a donation stream today (Sunday, later on after I sleep) here is my norm info, thanks for any help ^^


Most of the info you need to know about my commissions are here:

http://www.furaffinity.net/view/15951444/

Just need to post below with your character to see if I can handle it, if I think I can I will let you know so you can note me.

Want to add that I have been taking $70 simple refsheets so i am open for those too (extra for extra details)

Also doing funny meme images and icons if you like, please let me know what you would like.

Also if you are interested in comic book style commissions like this:

http://www.furaffinity.net/view/16711275/

They are only $5 more (because of the details)

If there is anything you need to ask just ask :3

EDIT: no stream today, for some reason I have a spot or something in my left eye making it hard to do art, so will stream on Monday if anyone is interested, otherwise please again post below, tipcs are welcomed because my friend needs the money badly and I sent back all I had so I could use money too x3;;

Working on commissions much as I can, but have been trying to at least get one done a day (or close to it) just been really tired so I hope people understand.

As some of you know from my last stream, I have not been able to go to the store cause my brother is working everyday, yesterday I order a pizza (I had no choice) and all it did was massively pushed my BP up so I could not sleep (even had trouble breathing when laying down, am fine now though) so I don't want anymore damn pizza, but I need to go to the store...

I feel alone, a guy who has a lot of health issues and no one is around to help me, my situation feels dangerous but there is nothing I can do, makes me wish I could move so I can be with the person I care most about, but sadly everyone is having trouble and there is no room for me to impose.

So yeah, sitting here with plenty of money and it is being wasted on expensive pizza... and I need to go pick up my meds, I hate my life.

Sorry for the rant, thanks for reading *hugs*

Most of the info you need to know about my commissions are here:

http://www.furaffinity.net/view/15951444/

Just need to post below with your character to see if I can handle it, if I think I can I will let you know so you can note me.

Want to add that I have been taking $70 simple refsheets so i am open for those too (extra for extra details)

Also doing funny meme images and icons if you like, please let me know what you would like.

Also if you are interested in comic book style commissions like this:

http://www.furaffinity.net/view/16711275/

They are only $5 more (because of the details)

If there is anything you need to ask just ask :3

Just some stuff I wanted to let people know about ^^

I'm online less and less because my issues are getting worse, since the took me off some meds my blood pressure easily goes up and what not so I am getting more snippy I guess, I am now more prone to tell people what I am thinking instead of being quiet, I hope I don't hurt anyone by mistake, but I going through a lot of changes and when you feel like crap 24/7 it's hard to be cheery like I use to be, I'm trying though cause no one wants to be around depressing people which is why I know some people and stopped wanting to come to my streams >>;

Been getting a lot of offline messages on Skype... but they are at times I am not even on? not sure what that is, so I changed my password just in case and wanted to say sorry to people that were trying to talk to me when I appeared to be on when I wasn't.

I am on Facebook, I keep getting friend requests from people I do not know, if I have chatted with you on my streams and you wanna add me that is cool, but gotta tell me who you are xD. Also I have been getting pokes and messenger messages, I don't know what a poke is still and I just kinda don't bother? and as for the messenger part, I usually log in on my tablet to keep tabs on my friends, but I am not an avid user.

I thought I had more to say, but I guess not, just wanted to throw as much as I could into one journal cause I know constant griping and stuff gets on peoples nerves >u>; I do want to stream this week if I can and will be opening up some joint commissions with my friend  tawnysweet so be on the look out for that (waiting for her to get done with her really pretty YCH go check it out!) till then if you would like some art from me just let me know here I guess ^^

Thanks for reading, I hope you guys are doing well, miss talking to a lot of you and wish the best for you all *hugs* ^^

Sorry I am gonna do this, I don't hate anyone or have anything against the people I am taking off, but I just want people I feel super close to on the list and not just a huge batch of people that don't even come to my streams anymore to hang out and stuffs.

I can understand if you get mad at me and that is fine, it is just something I feel the need of doing, it is this or just making a new Skype and only inviting certain people to it which I don't want to do.

If you really need to ask why or something you can note me, I will be adding people way less often unless I feel a strong connection with you.

I hope everyone will understand, thank you for reading *hugs*

My friend  tawnysweet is having a YCH, I normally don't like to post stuff like this, but she has been really sweet to me and done some amazing gifts, so if you would check the link out to her YCH I think you will be really impressed ^^

http://www.furaffinity.net/view/17489009/

Thanks for reading <3

Now that I am feeling better I wanted to post a new journal, like the first one I did here:

http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/6889465/

I wanted to spotlight 3 more people who have been great as commissioners and you would be honored if you were commissioned by them :D

In alphabetical order:


 Dakina - have not know them for long, but already have a few commissions from them 66and they are so polite and considerate, they are also very understanding about my health issues, they are also fun to chat with in streams


 Ereki - My buddy here has commissioned me a lot in the past, they are also patient and very kind to me (so kind in fact I added them to my Skype) they are also an artist and it's fun to draw in a bit of my style and theirs ^^


 Vixendefea - My lil fox, I have known her for quite awhile, adorable and silly she helps me tons and never fusses no matter how long I have to take on commissions, I trust her a lot and gives me really fun stuff to work on ^^


As you can see they all share the same traits, if you get commissioned by any of them be grateful! they are very patient if things come up!

Thanks for reading and I will be doing another one of these again in the future, good people need to be shown off :D

The more times goes by the more I know I will not be able to keep doing art for money, at least the way I am now.

I knew this was gonna happen, health is nose diving pretty bad... what I want to know is if I am worth it? as in if I started up a Patreon would anyone want to pledge or donate or what ever it is? I don't know if I am good enough to warrant asking for money like that, but I figured I'd ask what people thought because I can't even draw right now cause I am just tired all the time... when I try to draw I get frustrated and hate the things I do...

I dunno, guess it is funny to ask for support like that when I don't even like my art right now, but posting a journal to see the answers I get will help me decide... not even sure what to offer... just an idea at least, it's hard to make money anymore.

That is it, I appreciate you reading.