Forgot to write a journal after we returned. ^^;

The good: Santiago looks almost like Europe, honestly. Clean, working metro lines, information everywhere, expensive as fuck malls, cold weather almost all day (about 15-18°C, on average).

The bad: my sister was an absolute cunt, as usual. Cried twice trying to buy a GoPro camera and a Michael Kors wallet (both averaging about US$100, or BR$300), throwing along angry-teen arguments ("You never buy anything for me!", "I'm sick of looking at museums, you never go where I want!", "Everyone has that camera except me because my parents are cheap!" and so on), making my dad explode several times. He always says he won't take her on the next trip, but feels sorry and takes her along anyway. Maybe the lowest she went was trying to buy stuff without anyone knowing by putting in a US$150 perfume in my mom's bag. Without telling her. Sheesh.

The hilarious: Two of those. One, we made a mistake in the currency conversion for two days. For example, a McDonald's burger cost about $2000 chilean pesos. The guides we had said to cut off the zeroes and multiply the remainer by 3. That'd be about BR$6. Pretty cheap, right? Until we noticed the guide was using the dollar rate of 2.3...from last year. The dollar is averaging about 3.5 right now. After some calculus, my dad discovered we didn't have to multiply by 3, but by 6. So that same burger now cost BR$12. Not fun.
The second was smaller and common, but still amusing. Before we got there, close to the Andes, we had pretty much the heaviest turbulence ever. I was drained and half sleeping, same for my dad. Sister was drugged so hard, even a burning plane wouldn't wake her. That left...my mom, white as a ghost staring at the window with a face of someone about to have a heart attack. lol

ANYWAY, that was le trip. Sadly I didn't draw much. Just a little bit to impress a tattoo guy, due to boredom.
By the way, I'll go back to my old routine of drawing between 1pm until 4pm on weekdays, probably streaming it all (GMT -3:00). So yeah. Let's see how that goes. <_<

Just submitting earlyish. Will be away between friday (17th) and tuesday (21st) on a spiffy (and hopefully non-headache-filled) family trip to Chile. Sure, it's 'just over there', but still a bit far. Plus, it's gotta be colder than here, I hope. Just an FYI. ^^;

Second...uh, I assume the FA account status thing is legit? If so, one of my commissioners apparently...died. o_o...

Oh, and by the way, if any of you want to keep track, I update my front page every once in a while, including commission status, what it is, who already paid, etc. I mention this because I accidentally removed someone from there and didn't notice it for almost a month now. And they didn't either. <_<. >_>.

Anyway, that'll be all. Move along. >_>;

As many of you know, my bday was yesterday (many thanks for the good wishes, by the way :3) but the day itself was...quite shitty. Got a heavy flu (very heavy), some shitty sister behavior, frustrated parents and gf's plans and, the topping of the cake, got fixed, strong pains on my kidney area for the entire duration of last night. After a few dozen meds, painkillers and the like, finally managed to sleep. The pain is barely noticeable today, but it's still there. So I'm gonna lay low for a day or two and see how it unfolds.

So yeah. Unfun-ish. Hopefully I'll get better for some streaming soon.

Oh hey.

I guess you guys noticed the miracle that is me drawing again. It's still not exactly easy, but it's happening. My main issue is actually starting anything. Once photoshop is open and I'm scribbling like a retard, it's easy. The problem is getting to that point. I actually found that streaming helps, since there's some extra pressure to not stop after 5 minutes.
But we'll see how it'll go.

By the way, I turn 26 tomorrow. I feel ten years older, but my head seems to be twenty years younger. e_e

And yes, I'm working on commissions. That list up there makes me squashed with guilt. Plus, I need money. :c

So yeah, that's it. Let's go 'enjoy' whatever party or surprise-dinner parents will cook up. *gulp*

Yep. Despite all evidence to the contrary. Hell, I haven't -really- drawn anything since November.

Other than that, just the usual. Xmas with family, spent a few days there pirating stuff for them, sleeping till noon, gaming like an idiot, etc. Today I'll spend the new years in a hotel with my girlfriend and fuck like rabid beasts. Funz.

Anyway, for my (useless and never-fulfilling) new year's promise, I'll draw more next year. Much more. Hopefully. :c

Happy holidays and stuff. x3

Yeah, I haven't been arting much, have I?

The surgery on Nov. 13th went well. Except the inevitable part about peeing black blood afterwards, and the agonizing pain for a few days afterwards. :|

Anyway, current status: one commission has been sent to the commissioner(s) about...several days ago. Next one still owes me the info (yes, you know who you are, frenchie. ;D ) and the next one won't be submitted at their request...and then another pretty huge one. After that, will need to check if those in there still want one, given it's been a few...months since they asked. :c

Aside from that, awaiting exam results from uni (comes out Nov. 26th) to find out if I'll have to do some emergency exams. :D
And also a pretty big 'job exam' on Dec. 7th. It's two slots for over forty thousand candidates, me included...but passing will pretty much solve my job issue 4ev. My father did the same exam in '86 and is still in the same company today. Well, let's hope.

Lastly, I'm just noticing that my pattern is a mix of lazyness and fear. Usually in the form of "oh, that will take so long and so much effort...". Apply that to...anything ever, really. Might try to work on that from here on out.

And if said commissioner doesn't reply soon, I might just have to stream random porn. ;)

Quick updates.

One, decided to 'try' Skyrim, seeing as I have a decent GPU and stuff...ended up with about 100+ mods and utter addiction to it. Who'da thunk, rite?

The other, I've got a surgery again in...well, tomorrow afternoon. Cleaning up the left kidney with them laz0rs this time. Hopefully the spine anesthetic won't fuck up this time and leave me in days and days of utter pain again. So see ya soon. :D

I'm feeling way better. After that journal, I met girlfriend again, she was very comprehensive and we spent about an hour talking. She understands perfectly how I kinda 'need' to be alone and agreed to visit once in a while, mostly because games help her (and me) forget reality for a while. Something she can't do at home. At the time, we agreed to be just good friends, but she's asking if we can be in a relationship, but only see each other when I wish to. Which for me works wonders. So that took an enormous weight off my shoulders, despite my parents still being assholes about it.

Also, you may notice I didn't reply to the comments on the previous journal. And that's because I have no words. I could mention some names (but won't, to not make some feel 'inferior' of sorts, since everyone had good intentions) of those who wrote comments that I read and re-read and read again later and read again the next day and so on. They were epic and gave me some boost to live more. xD
So yeah, thanks all of you. <3~

Lastly, I'm doing three exams today. And my lost videocard arrived. And god, it's epic. Running Ryse, CoD AW, Evil Within, Shadow of Mordor, all on the absolute (or very close to) maximum in a card that doesn't even go beyond 70ºC. :D

Anyway, I'll have a commission done soon. And get on the next ones to stop my guilt eating me up. And to grab monies, since the dollar rating is nearing 3x Brazilian Reais. 100 bucks is equal to nearly 260 BRL. And that's great for me. :D~~~

Usually I don't like boring others with what goes on in my mind. After all, everyone has their own problems and worries to deal with. But today I woke up with a strong desire to commit suicide. I even have my suicide note planned in my head, along with the method and everything. And it's getting increasingly hard to resist. But what drives me to that? A bunch of things. Many of them seem minor, but they weigh heavily in my head. See, my lifelong dream is living somewhere the size of my room (small), just adding a small kitchen table and a bathroom. And especially, being alone. I can't take people for long in my private space. And, of course, a job that's doable and pays a decent amount. But then, the issues start.

What sparked it all this time was my father. Yesterday, my girlfriend asked if I'd be saddened or angry if we ended our relationship but remained friends. I said no, I wouldn't mind me. I'd just be worried about how she'd feel. So she ended it. Ok. Then I mentioned it to my father. A bunch of harsh words were yelled at me, along with things like "you'll have to decide whether to have a loving person by your side or be an isolated abnormal retard". I could think of a million things, but couldn't say any of them. And the truth of the matter is, I'm unable to be in a 'loving relationship'. Unable. I might be happy with someone, but I'm much happier alone. And society just doesn't get this. Nobody does. They think it's just a quirk or some weirdo preference, but it's at the core of my being. So when my girlfriend ended the relationship, I actually felt relieved. Having someone constantly coming here, sending messages, making me go out...all these little obligations drive me insane.

Next, future. I'm currently majoring in IT, did a tech course on computers, no job yet. But I can't find a sliver of willpower to study. Hell, I've got 3 exams tomorrow and another 3 after tomorrow, yet I'm still at lesson 2 out of 10 of one subject. Didn't even start studying the other five. I can't find it in me to do it. Worse, this is the 4th time I try college/university/whateveryoucallit. Even better, every single previous job of mine was a failure. First one was once a week, doing nothing. Next one got me fired and unpaid for two months of 7 -to-7 work. Next one I was so horrible at it, the student never returned from vacation and the company disappeared without telling me anything. And the last one, I wasn't a valuable enough employee to keep around when hard times hit. Even art isn't going well. I'm taking over a dozen weeks to finish ONE PICTURE.
Right now, I'm still entirely dependent on my parents. But they will die eventually. Could happen today, could happen in 30 years, who knows? But if it does and I'm in this state...it won't be fun. True, there's family out there, but they won't like a freeloader like me. Especially not an asperger weirdo. When I look at all that and feel its weight...it makes me want to run. To escape. Which is why my entire day is spent sleeping, gaming and daydreaming. It's my drug, to escape my reality and go to one where everything isn't as hard. Where you can always try again if you fail.

There's a lot more stuff like my kidney issues, random depressive bouts, sheer hatred of my country (and most countries, in general), unstable self-esteem, etc. The weight of all that might seem general to you, or you might have even worse weights to carry. But I don't measure problems by their weight. I measure them by who is carrying that weight. And I'm not strong enough for mine. So I just live each day, waiting for the time I finally snap and end it all. And I can't talk about this with anyone because they either refuse to listen to me talk about such a delicate subject as self termination...or they think it's just a bluff (my father and sister fall in that category). The feeling is so particularly opressive today that I can't even have fun with gaming. Part of me is deeply scared, but another is eager.

Anyway...I can only hope this is temporary and will pass, like always. I hope.
[/endrant]

Yep. Just had another surgery last Wednesday to remove the remaining 10+ stones on my right kidney. Shit is, they used some different kind of anesthesia during the surgery, dunno the name in English. It's one that is applied to your back and paralyzes everything below your waistline. The problem is, it's known to cause muscular pain afterwards. Until yesterday, headaches were crippling me when attempting to seat, along with the neck, shoulders and back. Today it's just the neck and shoulders. I'm having to content myself with watching movies all day, since seating still hurts greatly (even now. Ouch).

Also, once again, I'm gonna do away with the  feranya account and repost my porny art over here because of lazyness to log-relog-log-relog and I'm out of fucks to give. So expect some flood soon enough. Soon as I can seat for more than 5 minutes without cringing in pain. :c

Oh, and got a new vidcard that's taking an awful lot of time to get delivered. Gonna jump from a GTX570 toa GTX770. Lovely.

Cheers and stuff. :)

~DarkSilver
▼ My FA
217 messages ( 113S, 5C, 42J, 43F, 13W, 1N )

gg peeps. ;D

Anyways, yep, back from epic trip. The good: civilization, english, travelin', shoppin'. The bad: sister drove my parents to berserking rage, all of our bags got lost in the system on the flight back, indians and muslims everywhere.

First few days in Madrid. A bit lost with our portuguesespanish mix, took the wrong metro a few times, had small kidney pains. Then Paris. Le epix, save that french is a bitch to understand. Plus, montmartre is not a good neighborhood to sleep at night. lol
After that, a few hilarious moments to catch a bus to London. Dad nearly got kicked out for arguing with the driver who he later learned was portuguese and understood all the insults hurled at him and I slept on the cafeteria floor on the short boat ride across. Loved london mainly because I could understand almost everything. Hated that the pound is still four times our currency (euro is three) and nearly everyone there was foreign. Like, almost all of them. But hey, I found an art supply shop. :D~
From there, Amsterdam. Watching ladies in the Red Light, weed merchandise and unpronounceable street names (our canal/street was Prisengracht) leading my stubborn family to get us lost. :D
Then a train ride to Venice, where two ladies got pissed after they paid extra for a private room and ended up with the four of us. But we got along very well over the 14 hour trip. x_x
Venice was...expensiveland. Just bought a shirt and walked till my kidneys screamed. And yeah, bloodpiss every single day. D:
Then Rome...which amusingly was my least favorite. First because it was as dirty as Rio, and even more expensive. Second because I like history, but the whole family was just taking photos and moving on to the next "piece of old rock", as they said. :c
From there, short flight to Barcelona. Looked a bit, but by then the money was short, my sister was absurdly annoying and every few steps made me groan in agony. But the city was really beautiful. owo
And then, short train ride to Madrid and rushing to airport...except we lost the flight due to overbooking. So the company promised to pay each of us 600E, plus a hotel, food and transport to and from the hotel to the airport for tomorrow's flight. Except the 'transport' took around 3 hoursd to show up (by which point by father was steaming mad). My sister then threw a tantrum about my dad not buying her a 599-799E and went off on her own to buy it with the pocket money we didn't take yet. Anyway, following day, they refused to pay 600. Cut it down to 300, claiming we "voluntarily offered our seats". After some dad-splosion, we went on our way through the 12 hour flight. Upon arriving in Rio...our luggage was gone. Yays.

Anyways, need sleep. A lot of sleep. And pain medication. x_x

Yep. Leaving tomorrow morning, returning on September 29th. Will go through Spain, Italy, France, England (and Amesterdam in the Netherlands too, I think), just a family trip. And also my first trip outside the latino continent. Woot!

Anyway, I haven't been able to art at all. Still dealing a bit with the issue of peeing crimson pain in the bathroom occasionally. But I'll take a notebook with me to the trip...who knows, might art something over there.

Also, if you live there and wanna show up or something, let me know. Got a nifty SIM card for worldwide calling. :D

So...yeah. See you peeps in a month!

...*looks one last time with strong guilt at the long list of awaiting commissions*...:c

Oh hai. Yeah, I'm much better by now. Still getting random pains and peeing blood occasionally, mostly due to that nifty longass cable within my kidneys. And...you know, infections and whatnot.
Anyway, I'll admit to have been lazy again and haven't arted since the sudden pain un-orgasm. And just when I had some momentum with it. :c

Anyway, there's stuff in the works, shown below:

Various screens of the next numbered pic, with sex now!
https://www.dropbox.com/s/7mmj2jc53.....46.36.png?dl=0
https://www.dropbox.com/s/sub49p9r1.....27.30.png?dl=0
https://www.dropbox.com/s/yfxvr9fps.....52.15.png?dl=0
https://www.dropbox.com/s/qrkwniuqo.....50.49.png?dl=0

Commission being worked on:
https://www.dropbox.com/s/l2xe4o3oj.....41.02.png?dl=0
https://www.dropbox.com/s/ld41miilr.....32.15.png?dl=0

Yet another sex pic, being colored (lineart's on Feranya):
https://www.dropbox.com/s/uz1fx0u5a.....46.51.png?dl=0
https://www.dropbox.com/s/wrk0r52c4.....23.45.png?dl=0

So...yeah. Stuff. Soon as I can un-addict me from games and bear to tell my GF I miss being alone, I'll get on those. :3

Oh, also, the kidney thing isn't so bad. Just got around...10 stones in each kidney, largest left being 7.1mm, on the right being 6.2mm. And the one that smote me with pain sized...5.1mm. D:~
Anyway, next, in a few days (after our vacation trip to Europe in Semptember), I'll do a laser treatment to break ALL THAT SHIT TO OBLIVIOOOON!

So yeah. Bai. :3

Yeah, kidney stones gave me a scare last Wednesday with a rather strong pain that subsided in a few seconds. No such luck on Friday, where I woke at 10am with scream-inducing, non-stop pain. Eventually, had to call a taxi and my mom (dad was one state away in a conference). Mom went off to the hospital like any super-paranoid, overcaring mother would. The pain subsided by 10:40am. Between that and 17:30, we were doing what should be the hospitals' motto: "Please wait over there". By 18:00, doc confirmed it was indeed a pretty big, pointy stone that was making its home on my urine tract and it needed to be removed surgically. After yet more waiting, I went to surgery at 21:00 and woke at about...23:00 or so. Was too groggy to say. Saw my mom at about 1 in the morning, then slept like a log in the hospital's surgery recovery room, since no private rooms were available. Oh, and did I mention I didn't eat or drink a single thing between midnight on Thursday until 6 in the morning of Saturday? Because by 6 today, the cheap bread and cold toasts tasted like the best food ever! Anyway, I'm already back home (to the relief of paranoid mom and similarly paranoid gf). Peeing is still a bloody ordeal, literally. Hurts like hell. And even better, it leaks even while I'm sleeping, as my bloodied underparts attest.
Next week I'll visit the doc again for a followup and some treatment for the next stones, since both kidneys have stones so huge, they show up on the X-rays, which should detect mostly bone-related issues.

Aside from that, I'm working on the next numbered pic (porn), an old uncolored giftart for jaira (also porn) and a three-people commission (detail porn :D). I'll get down to it once my kidney stops hurting. Meep.

Ever had depression for more than two weeks, continuously? If you did, that's me. Anytime I return to reality, the feeling of "I'm lazy, nothing is fun, I hate everything, I shouldn't exist, I should cut my wrists off and swallow a whole box of sleeping pills" come in full force (down to thinking what to write in my suicide note). As a result, I've been drowning in games lately. Even managed to finish Obscure (Resident Evil-styled survival horror for the PS2) in one sitting with my GF playing alongside me in coop (despite the fact she didn't know how to switch weapons, even at the last boss). And surprisingly, zero cheats (except maybe savestating before tough sections. Yay emulators!). Was the first time I've finished a survival horror without a pile of cheats AND the first time I've ever finished a game in coop. Plus the sex later that night. And the night after. ;)

However, anytime I try to sit and art ANYTHING at all, I can't. Sketches look horrible, my mind drifts off and I keep pushing my drawing time to later. Worse, I feel deathly guilty for all those people in line for commissions (and the ones that ask but give up after seeing how fricken' long I'm taking).

I think the best way to describe my arting issue is that I feel very negative before even starting. You know when you have to do a tough, tedious or frustrating task, like some school homework? It's a similar feeling. Worse, when I do actually manage to try something, my mind instantly crucifies anything I try to do as "shitty". I used to have similar issues with games (that led me to cheating madly) but now those are gone, unless the game is really, really frustrating the shit out of me. Maybe it's practice (since in the days I used to draw comics, art was plentiful), maybe I need to be forced into it (like during long trips or boring classes, where I draw a dozen pages of sketches). Might be the first, since the best word to describe what I feel before or during art is "Fear", which can be also used to describe like half the things I -think- of doing. Hell, I have to go downtown to solve some of my mother's document bullshits, but I'm already pushing it off to later at thinking how the office must be crowded, how it'll take long and so on. Yay negativity!

Anyway, should end this rant here. And...probably go back to Sacred 2. Merf. :C

Not sure if it was the meds or my naggy gf, but I've finally been gaming for a while without cheating. Even horror games like Amnesia, which I thought I'd never finish. o:
On the other hand...I've been heavily art blocked. Sometimes I kinda promise myself to spend at least an hour on it, but never get around to starting. Haven't even opened photoshop in over a week now. It MIGHT be a mix of guilt and procrastination, especially with a dissertation I've yet to finish and stuff. Plus, gf visits often, so I don't want to bore her with my slow-ass arting. Arrrrgh.

And yes, the country is in a mix of crying and laughing after that epic semifinal match against Germany in the world cup. Lol'd my ass off at that. :D

Anyway...uh, that's that. :c

Hai.

Will be away between tomorrow and sunday. It's a holiday on thursday and friday is what we call a "hang". In other words, "skip work day". Parents decided to travel to hometown and I'm forcibly invited to go, mainly because I missed the last time (Mom's bday) to sleep naked with girlfriend. And worse, around the same time, my mom's/aunt's half-brother died of a heart attack and my aunt is depressed. Except she's a 'social' depressive, in which she wants as many people around her as possible. So yeah.

On art...I'm kinda stuck. Pondering some ways to accelerate my arting process somehow. And also hating my shitty anatomy skills and enormous proportion issues. Currently working on a promised gift for someone, another bigass porn pic for another person (or two, kinda. >:3) and redesigning Rune to make her my only 'alter-ego' character. The file is already 5520x7238px. Fun.
And yeah, add the guilt of the pile of commissions, most from months ago...and I feel very, very, very guilty. But hey, at least only one person in there paid, and they apparently don't mind, so...Meep.

Other than that, I've just been gaming and watching Penn & Teller's Bullshit series, along with Stand Up Comedies. Though I need help finding more shows/comedians. One can't survive on P&T and George Carlin alone. And Mythbusters sucked. :D

Anyways, see you guys on monday. Hopefully with some shitty traditional art. oO

So...uh, yeah, another Journal.

On art, I'm still trying to get started. I'm procrastinating furiously at it, mainly out of guilt because there's a pile of school stuff I haven't done (online lessons, final dissertation, impending exams). Plus...the girlfriend. Parents went out of town for the weekend and she decided to come over and spend the night. Sex won't happen, since she had uterus surgery just last week and is still recovering internally from issues with the anesthetic, which left her in agonizing pain for nearly a week.

Anyway, the issue is...she's head over heels with me. But I'm not. She's a fun, morbid and dark person and all, the kind that loves my gory art and would have sex while listening to Nox Arcana...but I'm not all "LOOOVE" at her, really. Usually, that's not a very fun match, especially considering how I've been a loner the past half a dozen years...Will have to see how this goes.

Back to art...yes, lazy, procrastination, negativity and too much gaming. The usual. D:

Lastly...the recent med I've been taking. Thankfully it didn't screw up my sleep again, but it did other things. One, I'm actually concentrating on some stuff and not changing things and restarting games and pictures every morning. That is great for me. Two, unfortunately it also causes drowsiness. I've been sleeping early and in the afternoon as well. Third, the most amusing one...apparently this class of anti-depressant/anti-anxiety drug causes...sexual dysfunctions. Basically, it's been very hard for me to get a boner. lol
...But it's a temporary side effect. I've been returning to normal recently. ;3

Well, that's it...Sigh, I need to do art faster. Maybe I'll start selling sketches or something. Maybe colored, 1-hour Krita sketches...What do you guys think? o_o;

...Yeah, the couple that was hanging around here already left. On Monday actually. And yet, I haven't touched Photoshop since last week. Just did two quick vent arts while my girlfriendish watched. Need to get my scanner installed again, as I had to format my PC two weekends ago.

On another note, my meds ran out on tuesday, while my appointment was on wednesday. So I spent one day without them...and goddamn, it's a huge difference. It felt hard to even wake up. On the other hand, in addition to having Asperger's Syndrome and ADD, apparently I'm showing symptoms typical of OCD too, according to my shrink. She gave me some anti-depressant that, according to what I read, is also extremely effective against all sorts of anxiety disorders (Paroxetine). Let's hope it works, because tonight I felt utterly sick. Might have been food, but...who knows. <_<

Anyway....yeah. I need to stop freeloading. Haven't even started my next commission yet. D:~

So....yeah, that's it. Cheers and stuff. <_<

Just saying that it'll be pretty hard to art with people here for ten days. And all the accumulated guilt of me not studying.

On the other hand, I'll start practicing something: doing two commissions at a time, alternating between them. My main problem isn't the lineart or anything, really. Those are done in 3 days - 1 week...but I'm taking nearly a month to deliver each. The reason? LAZYNESS. The few days I do art, it's just an hour, maybe two. Part of that if my genuine fear of failure mixed with negativity (affects me in games too: I tend to cheat hard in games due to fear of doing badly, then restart once I realize the game became boring as shit). As a result, just THINKING of arting already engages me in procrastination mode. You know, the classic "Ah, well...uh, maybe later..." line.

Plus, I might have to go back to my shrink. I'm having some really shitty ADD moments. I just can't concentrate or make a single choice in anything. Always changing, going back, restarting, etc. And also because I've been pretty...I dunno. Down, I guess. You know, when nothing excites you at all. Might also be piled worry/guilt too. Especially with that whole GF-ish business. Kinda makes me guilty to even be in this relationship, as I'm the kind of person that -does not- enjoy being out with people. Unless they're very close and very similar to me.

Oh well. Let's stop here before I rant forever. And restart games again because cheatings. e.e

You know my greatest dream right now? MOVING THE FUCK OUT OF HERE.

As if I'm not stumped enough with a pile of art to do and college stuff and health issues, my parents decide to warn me that some friends of theirs will spend 10 days here. What that means? Means that I'll have to babysit them, empty my furniture (and take it to the second floor) for them and generally keep giving them attention like the social human being I'm not.

And not mentioning the pile of bullshit I keep having to solve for my family. And my naive, narcissistic and spoiled bitch of a sister that can't be bothered to even pick up a fucking phone call. "It's a man's job to do this stuff" she says. While eating cookies watching TV all-fucking-day.

Greeeaat.

Hell, I hate even washing dishes I didn't use. I use a cup and a plate, but gotta wash 10 plates, 15 cups, bowls, etc. I buy a small soda can, take a sip...by night, it's gone. And nobody, NOBODY cares to even take their trash out. Just let it pile up and stink. FFFffff.

Okay, rant over. I need to go shoot shit up. >:|

Yeah, will disappear between friday and tuesday. Catholics are so persecuted and small here that they make nearly a whole week into a holiday. But who cares, free days!

Also, my scanner is dead. Along with the printer. Fantastic. -.-v

Hey again.

I'll be off until sunday and next week between thursday and the whole week after that. It's a relative's birthday tomorrow...100 years old. And surprisingly, considering my family's history, he's still sane and with good eyesight. I say that because we have a 98 year old aunt that's completely insane now (she talks with her dad using her hand to mimic a cellphone) and a 70 and 60 year old aunt and uncle are starting to tell crazyass stories. Mostly because of Alzheimer's, which kills their memory and jumbles memories together (like my uncle saying he piloted warplanes in WW2. lawl).

I'll probably try to art a bit in between. :3

Also, I've made an account on SoFurry ( https://runebeast.sofurry.com/ ). The bright side is that most people in there have impeccable grammar. Might be because writers seem to be popular there. Maybe I can hunt down some stories again. :3
However, the art, much like FA, makes me shiver occasionally. It has the amusing feature of recommending art right on submitted pieces. Those often have nothing to do with the piece at hand (had cub porn suggested on that face-ripping picture, for instance) or it recommends you your own art. But most of the time, it's just horrible, horrible art. It's actually making me want to do a tutorial on the basics of art, like volumes, sketching, levels of detail and so on. It's sad that a bunch of furries today know how to draw perfect cocks, but nothing else. Literally. Might be that I'm just an idealist that requires art to have -some- meaning and not be automatic by-the-book art that's mechanically dished out.

Anyway, better stop that here before I rant for too long. ^^;

Also, on commissions...for fuck's sake people. If you want one, the pricelist is right there, the journal and queue is right at the front of the page. And in the journal it says that they're done as they arrive...which i really should do sometime. Basically, there's 10 slots, 5 for each of my pages. But I do them in the order the commissions are confirmed. For example, next in my list is  Pyrewerepyre. After him,  Br0hk3r. After, however, it's  Jaymesesquilo , who confirmed right after them. Then we go back to  billsc26 and on and on.

Also, not many read it, but there's a hidden queue too, in case. I've had requests recently, but when they see the full line, they say they'll wait. But that's kinda risky. I had a free slot for a few days which got taken, after they talked to me. So yeah, if you want.

Also again, if you give up because I take too farkin' long, please tell me. I've taken people out of the line before and they never noticed. Or asked. Or showed life signs. <_<

Lastly, sorry, but I DO take long. Mostly because that spiffy lineart I love making takes damn long. And my fellow livestreamers addicted me to Steam. xD

Anyways...that's all for now. Cheers!

One, because some people on Livestream convinced me to get a Steam account, I'm now utterly addicted to Planetside 2. And had facepalming experiences with CS:GO and Warframe. Fun!
Also, I haven't played online shooters in over 10 years. x_x

EDIT: My steam name is Runebeast. :3

Second, traveling to hometown again, on friday. Argh.

Third, I randomly got a...date? Haven't had one of those in a while. o_O

Fourth, school started. And it's just as shitty as before. Who'da thunk?

That's all. Cheers!

Oh hai again. OMG I SURVIVED 4 PLANE TRIPS IN A ROW ZOMG.


...*ahem*, anyway, yep, it was fun. Especially the Paraguay visit. Since it's a no-tax country, it's pretty much a "buy all you can" kind of place. Amusingly, within a building you find a store with $700 jeans. Step outside, and you're in the black market. Guns, drugs, that kind of stuff. brrr.

Anyway, I got myself a 3TB HDD, a Wii mini (sucks, but hey, 100 bucks), a DSi XL (again, just 100 bucks) and a new tablet. The bad news is that it's a Bamboo. The good news is that it's a 12x8 inch (my Intuos 4 was 3x6). The best news is that it gives me WAY more control over lines in general. Much more precision. But the worst news is that they fooled me good with it. The tablet is mostly flat, so you look and think OMG SO MUCH SPAEC. But the area you -actually- use is marked by for near-invisible crosshairs in it. Which is quite smaller. And despite the "adjust tablet to screen size" feature, it never goes beyond those boundaries. Oh well. STILL LOTSA PRECISIONZ.

Anyway, I'll be back to arting soon. Probably not today. Transferring a few extra TBs to new HD, trying to find a new Acekard since mine got bricked and figuring out where to use the Wii (AV Cable + 27inch HDTV = HORRIBLE VIDEO DAFUQ).

Oh, there was some other stuff about watching huge Falls, talking with random foreigners and enduring my shitty sister. And even more amusing is that I kinda became a walking encyclopedia, since the city actually had a muslim mosque and a buddhist temple. The latter was especially...interesting. Picture yourself on a packed (really packed) tourist bus, a group of muslim men, one of them clutching a backback. All sitting in groups. In the city center.

Yep.

Anyways, be back soon. Cheers! x3