So... yeah. Congrats to anyone who gets what the title refers to. Some things I've been realizing about myself: I know I'm a screw-up. I know I'm independant to a fault, and a horrible excuse for a friend. I know I need to open up and talk to people more. I know that I shouldn't be bottling up all my emotions, and then waiting for myself to explode. I also know that none of you care, but just read on. I'm not typing this out to expose my flaws to the world; quite the contrary. I want you guys to. I know, I know, it sounds weird, but comment this journal with at least one of your flaws. We are all human(ish), and none of us are in any way perfect, or in a position to judge. This isn't a chain-mail type thing. Just an experiment, to see how many of us are willing to admit something we don't like about ourselves, or that someone else has pointed out as a flaw. Respond, and I might start working on some gift art, or a couple of free stories, who knows...

Yeah, ignore the title. I've been listening to both the Hair soundtrack and Darren Hayes nonstop for the past week or so.

It's been a weird week, too, and music has been one of the few intangible things that actually made me smile. I'm not in the mood or at liberty to go into detail, but I think I'm gonna be in the doghouse for a while. Bottom line, I messed up, proved myself a hypocrite(also known as a human being), and I'm paying for it in full. I have no objections, really. The rational part of my brain believes I had it coming. The other part... just wants to drown my sorrow in chocolate and sad music and sappy movies.

In lighter(?) news, I've decided not to post any art on my other account... yet. At some point, I'll post some stuff there, but it might all be digital, or all stories, or just a mix, like it is on this account. I haven't decided yet. Me and my indecisive ways. Oh well, that's pretty much everything you guys get to know for now, so... goodnight, sleep tight, all that good stuff.

And... for the record, I'm not quite the despicable human being you think I am. We all make mistakes, and only a few of us make an effort to set them right, or even acknowledge that what we did was wrong. I am in no way begging, or even asking, for forgiveness. Just understanding. Understand that I am sorry, and I acknowledge my mistake, and even though there's nothing I can really do to fix it, I'll still try like hell.

Well... this is unexpected. I was toying around on FurAffinity a few minutes ago, trying to see if the name Ryota was available as a username... and ended up making an account. I'm treating it as a backup account, for now, but... should I give up the account I have now completely and switch to Ryota? I mean, I have no problems with the one I have now, it's just that Ryota is the name I use for both my fursona and my artist's alias. That's why whenever you see that pawprint on my art, it has an R in the center. What do you guys think? Abandon this account, or stick with it? Also, I'm still taking advice about commissioning stories, if anyone read my last journal.

Hmm. While taking a semi-important test, I had an interesting thought: I was thinking about how some artists do comissions, and things like that. Well, I wonder, can you do the same thing with literature? Is it concievable to do story comissions? If so, I would like to try that out. I mean, hey, I can write, and I need money, so why not? Comment on this if you have any thoughts, or if you would like to explain how the whole comission thing works. (I have no idea how to get that going...) Right now, I'll take a free request if I like you well enough, so if you have been nice to me at some point in the past, feel free to ask. Peace out, furs. =^-^=

I just beat Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney for the second time. I don't know why, but even though I know exactly how to win each case, the game is still entertaining as hell, and I still get a thrill out of backing the witness into a corner. Maybe... Being a lawyer is in my blood? Or, maybe, it's merely an outlet for my inner belligerence? Or, a third option: maybe, just maybe, it's a good game. Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney. Go buy it. Tell your friends.

In other news, I am coming down with a case of the Placebo Flu. It comes from an unknown source, has no symptoms, and no cure. Thankfully, no other cases have been reported thus far.

And, to end this random and utterly unneccessary journal on a happy note, I am pleased to announce that... I RAN, I RAN SO FAR AWAY... I JUST RAN, I RAN ALL NIGHT AND DAY... Okay, enough references to awesome 80's pop songs. Time for bed. G'night, readers.
=^-^=

Sorry, but I am just very bored, very nauseous, very aggravated, and for some odd reason, very hyper. I want to scream, or leap for joy, or even both at once, I don't care anymore. Yeah... Very bizarre mood. I don't know what's happening to me! Every time I pick up a pencil, I feel the urge to draw an eye, and that eye grows into a head, and the head grows a body, WTF! I get inspired at the most INAPPROPRIATE times, as evidenced by the most recent drawing I uploaded. And yet, I have to struggle to even get out the first sentence of a story. Everything is upside down; I'm paying attention in school, I'm actually drawing decent looking stuff, and I'm SAVING MONEY! I went to the mall, and bought absolutely NOTHING useless! Unless you count the Airheads that that crackhead sold me. I couldn't help it, he was very intimidating. And get this: I was actually looking for ART SUPPLIES! GAWD, I'm turning into an artist! NOOOOOOOO- wait. That's a good thing. I mean, I want to get better, and apparently I am, but... Not at the sacrifice of my writing prowess. I might just have to sit here and FORCE out a new story one of these days. That, and I really have to get back to work on Bleeding Love. I haven't written ANY new chapters yet, and I promised those poor people on Quizilla that the hiatus wouldn't last long... Damn. Duty calls. And I never pick up. 'Cause I'm just that cool. Oh, who am I kidding, I'm a loser. I'm a loser, and I'm going to die, because somebody is going to throw a cat at my face, and I'm going to have an asthma attack, and DIE! Okay, I'm done being dramatic. I'm gonna stop typing before I say something stupid so... stop reading.

What's cracking, buttnuggets? How are you? I hope you are fine. I am NOT FINE. I am nasally, bored, and can't draw at the moment. I had a tingle of inspiration yesterday, and nothing came of it. Just scribbles. I have also watched about eight movies in the past three days, and half a season of Andy Milonakis. GAWD, someone brighten my day with something entertaining. Please?


.:*EDIT*:. I managed to get through the day. Thanks for nothing, most of you. And thank you, to the one person who actually did make me smile today, it was lovely to see you.

Okay, about that comic idea I mentioned last week... it crashed and burned. XD Halfway through drawing the first page, I realized I couldn't draw it right, and that it wasn't going to work out the way I planned. Oh well, I still have the cover page (which, incidentally, has no title), and it looks pretty good. Well, by my standards... Ah well. Anyway... GOD DAMMIT! Why did Better Days have to end? Where will I turn when I have a random urge to... read a new page of a comic? I haven't felt this betrayed since Joey chose Pacey in season 3 of Dawson's Creek. Eh, that's it for now, stay tuned for sporadic submissions. =^-^=

Kinna bummed. Sorry, had to get the bad news out of the way. Haha, pay no attention to the title, I'm not the kind of person who takes out their frustration on themselves. I take it out... ON THE INTERNET! RAWRGH!!!!! Hehe. I tend to take it out in my art more, though. For example... My grief produced an idea for a short comic. I know, I know... How can someone who can't draw come up with a comic? I'll find a way. It's going to be about Ryota (ME!), pretty much, and about how he is annoyed with the constant character design changes and varied origin story drafts. I guess the title of the comic should be "Who/What the Fuck Am I?!" then. Ah welll, time to work on it. LATER! =^-^=

I.... am bored. Like, literally bored. I can't draw. Absolutely no inspiration, right this minute. I know what I want to draw, I have clear images in my mind of what I want to appear on the paper... it just won't come out. Damn. Oh well. I'm losing steam as far as writing goes, as well. I think I'm somewhat tapped, in genereal these days. Then again, some would say I'm just easily distracted... Okay, off topic. Getting back on. Umm... Art stuff... OH YEAH! I might just be able to access the scanner at some point this weekend, so *maybe* keep an eye out for new stuffs. One of the drawings I have yet to load is pretty damn cute, according to everyone who has seen it. Only thing is, it has no color. Maybe it's better that way. And... yikes. I really need to get back into drawing, I feel like my skills are ebbing away... That's all for now, folks. Later! =^-^=

Well... Good news and bad news. Good news? I downloaded Open Office, after about fifteen tries, and copied and pasted the majority of my stories onto it. Bad news? They're the wrong file type, and I can't load them onto here. Oh well, maybe it's just one of those things that isn't meant to be. Oh, and I lied. No inspiration hit me last week, at least not for a drawing. I've been writing up a storm, excreting three spin-offs of Just a Friend, and... the first stanza of a sonnet? Holy cow. I need to get off my lazy ass and pick up a pencil before I lose what little drawing skill I actually have. That is how it works, right? "If you don't use it, you lose it?" I have no damn clue. Anywho... Yeah, that's what I need. More draw, less write. I can still sing, thankfully... Although, I haven't seriously practiced since the play. Oh man, what if I lose my voice?! I'll never work in this town again! AAAAAAAH!!! Okay, sorry, dramatic moment over. I'm rambling now, so... G'night, buttnuggets! =^-^=

I am in a ridiculously good mood. For the first time since... pretty much ever, I'm smiling a lot, and it isn't an act for once. Im just... genuinely happy. Why?... Well, that's information that isn't necesary for you folks in Internetland. Let's just say my happiness is coming from a very beautiful external source. My newfound joy is showing itself in my art; I actually drew something intentionally cute. Hah... pretty rare occurence. And I want to draw something even cuter, but no ideas just yet. I'll probably be struck with inspiration later in the week, come up with something dull, then scrap it and draw something REALLY cute. Well, that's it for now. Guess I'll go do other stuff now... Oh, and if anyone on here has stumbled across my Quizilla page, you might be pretty bummed to hear that Bleeding Love is going on hiatus. Sorry! I just ran out of ideas, and need to brainstorm new ways to flesh out the plot. Later! =^-^=

So... Since my art is sub-par, and I barely ever get to use the scanner, I figured I would let you guys in on my furry literature, but I can't. Apparently, it has to be in a file on your computer to be submitted. My computer came without Microsoft Word, so I wrote it all on Quizilla (and all the more "dirty" stuff on Yahoo Mail). Alas, this means I have no means of getting my stories to you. Unless... either you A) Ask me for a link to the stuff on Quizilla, B) Give me your e-mail and ask me to send you one of the dirty ones (or request your own, for a price), or C) Tell me a way to get them on here. Well, hop to it, people.

-Ryota Tsumetora, aka Dark_Tiger

.:*EDIT*:. Whoever can figure out a way for me to get my freaking stories on FA without having to buy some program will get a free story OR decent drawing. If you should happen to be that lucky, I'll message you for the details of what you want done. Later! =^-^=