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Oh my god there is an actual way to display sarcasm in text!
General | Posted 14 years agoIt's a backwards question mark!
So, for example, someone says something incredibly stupid, and you say, "Oh, yeah, that makes a lot of sense؟"
We're saved! We're saved!!
So, for example, someone says something incredibly stupid, and you say, "Oh, yeah, that makes a lot of sense؟"
We're saved! We're saved!!
A meme...
General | Posted 14 years ago1. What is your character's name?
Lukiber De Larko
2. What kind of character is it (furry, anime, etc) and any particular race?
Demon
3. What is the first thing your character would think of when he/she first wakes up?
Smoke...Coffee...
4. Your character's favorite outfit would be?
Usually naked, but if he had to wear clothing, it would be camouflage shorts and a black t-shirt.
5. When your character looks into a mirror, what's the first thing they would notice?
Probably something about his mohawk
6. Does your character have the same tastes in food as you?
I suppose?
7. How is your character similar to you?
Well, considering the character is supposed to be the embodiment of ME...
8. How is he/she different?
I don't have horns.
9. If your character could speak, would they have the same voice as you?
A bit more gruff.
10. If you were to suddenly become your character, what do you think would be the first thing you would do as them?
Try to keep my balance for a bit, then look in the mirror and play with my horns.
11. Is there something about your character that you don't like how others think of them?
I really can't stand when people look at Lukiber as nothing more than a figure of sex. Really, I don't do all that many adult pictures of him, so I don't really get it.
12. What advantages does your character have over you?
Height, horns and much bigger muscles.
13. What disadvantages?
Well, if you're talking about the world in which he lives, demons are segregated (that whole 'separate, but equal' bullshit) and treated like shit.
14. Do you have any secrets relating to your character that only you know?
That only I know? No. That very few people know? Yes. Does he know the secret? No.
15. Do you have any secret drawings only you know about?
Nope. Mass amounts of unfinished sketches which cover several years worth of sketchbooks? Yes.
16. Do you have any plans for your character or are you working on something big relating to him/her?
Multiples.
17. What misconception(s), if any, do people have about your character?
That he's another slut in the fandom. He's with someone, and he won't be with anyone else.
Of course, that someone is different between his world and ours.
Think of it this way - there are two versions of him. The one in my book, and the one I draw all of the time.
18. If you could have just ONE characteristic from your character, what would it be?
His figure. I would KILL EVERYTHING SO HARD for that body.
19. Have you made any characters that go along with yours, based on real-life people, that have the same relationship with your character as you with the real-life person?
I haven't made any, no, but there is a character my boyfriend made, who is drawn with Lukiber quite often.
20. Have you written any stories about your character?
I'm in the midst of it right now (still looking for proofreaders!)
21. How has your character changed since his/her first creation?
Immensely.
22. Give us a one-liner from him/her.
"...The fuck?!"
23. What's something people would be surprised to learn about your character?
That's part of that secret.
24. If you met your character in real life, what would you do with him or her?
Good question...
Lukiber De Larko
2. What kind of character is it (furry, anime, etc) and any particular race?
Demon
3. What is the first thing your character would think of when he/she first wakes up?
Smoke...Coffee...
4. Your character's favorite outfit would be?
Usually naked, but if he had to wear clothing, it would be camouflage shorts and a black t-shirt.
5. When your character looks into a mirror, what's the first thing they would notice?
Probably something about his mohawk
6. Does your character have the same tastes in food as you?
I suppose?
7. How is your character similar to you?
Well, considering the character is supposed to be the embodiment of ME...
8. How is he/she different?
I don't have horns.
9. If your character could speak, would they have the same voice as you?
A bit more gruff.
10. If you were to suddenly become your character, what do you think would be the first thing you would do as them?
Try to keep my balance for a bit, then look in the mirror and play with my horns.
11. Is there something about your character that you don't like how others think of them?
I really can't stand when people look at Lukiber as nothing more than a figure of sex. Really, I don't do all that many adult pictures of him, so I don't really get it.
12. What advantages does your character have over you?
Height, horns and much bigger muscles.
13. What disadvantages?
Well, if you're talking about the world in which he lives, demons are segregated (that whole 'separate, but equal' bullshit) and treated like shit.
14. Do you have any secrets relating to your character that only you know?
That only I know? No. That very few people know? Yes. Does he know the secret? No.
15. Do you have any secret drawings only you know about?
Nope. Mass amounts of unfinished sketches which cover several years worth of sketchbooks? Yes.
16. Do you have any plans for your character or are you working on something big relating to him/her?
Multiples.
17. What misconception(s), if any, do people have about your character?
That he's another slut in the fandom. He's with someone, and he won't be with anyone else.
Of course, that someone is different between his world and ours.
Think of it this way - there are two versions of him. The one in my book, and the one I draw all of the time.
18. If you could have just ONE characteristic from your character, what would it be?
His figure. I would KILL EVERYTHING SO HARD for that body.
19. Have you made any characters that go along with yours, based on real-life people, that have the same relationship with your character as you with the real-life person?
I haven't made any, no, but there is a character my boyfriend made, who is drawn with Lukiber quite often.
20. Have you written any stories about your character?
I'm in the midst of it right now (still looking for proofreaders!)
21. How has your character changed since his/her first creation?
Immensely.
22. Give us a one-liner from him/her.
"...The fuck?!"
23. What's something people would be surprised to learn about your character?
That's part of that secret.
24. If you met your character in real life, what would you do with him or her?
Good question...
Preparing once again...
General | Posted 14 years agoFor NaNoWriMo! 8D
I'm still working on Family Values, and I'd like to finish it by the end of NaNoWriMo this year.
The synopsis I have for Family Values right now on the NaNoWriMo website is this:
Demons live on earth. They are segregated and treated poorly, as if they were inferior. Hunting them has become a sport, capturing them, a game. The largest Hunter in the world has been killed by one of his own prisoners and one demon has been captured by the devil himself. Now, a journey into hell and back will decide the fate of the world, and possibly existence itself.
I think that's a fairly catchy synopsis, and possibly the best blurb I've written for Family Values since I started writing it. lol
I have no idea if I'll end it at the 50,000 word marker (or shortly after that...I don't want to cut it off mid-sentence, y'know). I want to do multiple books, but I don't know if I want to finish this one with everything being happy-go-lucky at the end, or semi-happy-go-lucky with something dark on the horizon, or even possibly just as everyone is heading off to battle, or something. I don't know.
Anyway, HAVE AN EXCERPT! 8D
Jack smiled again and said, “Well, that’s the question, isn’t it? What does Treachery have to lose if the ultimate act of treachery is committed?” He dropped his smile and a seething scowl replaced it. “I lose what is rightfully mine! The realm of treachery is rightfully mine, because I am Treachery itself! The task with which the gods themselves charged me at the beginning of time is the exact opposite of Pandora’s jar. While the jar unleashed anger, hatred, disease, what have you, the last remainder inside the jar was hope. My task is to grant hope, happiness and success. When the person is finally where they want to be…I destroy everything in one fell swoop.”
Frўdæ looked between his father and the monstrous creature, confused.
“What kind of god would charge anyone or…anything, as the case seems to be, with such an act?”
“Why, yours, of course!” He stood up and started pacing around the living room. “The gods deemed that for every action, there needs to be an equal, but opposite reaction, something Newton discovered, but applied to physics. Even though he was correct in his application, he didn’t know that the same law applies to everything, including spirituality, gods, and literally everything else. Thus, my friends, the moment Pandora allowed her curiosity to get the better of her, I was born.” He stopped pacing and faced the two of them with his hands spread wide and his wicked grin playing across his face again. His smile faltered and he began to slowly pace again. “Unfortunately, my one and only rule is that I cannot lie to the subjects whom I choose to help. In your case, this is actually very fortunate, because this means that when I tell you that I have no intention whatsoever to destroy your hopes and dreams of returning your loved one home…I am telling that absolute truth.”
Frўdæ raised his hand to stop him. “Wait a minute…if you were charged to destroy the hope and all that once it’s been built, how can you tell us that you won’t do it to us, too?”
Arodin stopped pacing again and said, “I can assure you, because I choose who I help. I choose what happens to them. There has been only one other person who I did not destroy afterward, and there were no consequences. If I say that I will not demolish your task once finished, I mean it with all sincerity.”
He walked over the Frўdæ and Kazbyron and placed a hand on each ones shoulder. “I must warn you, my friends,” he said gently, “Time is strange between Hell and earth. Yes, Frўdæ, I left that message in place of your cigarettes, which I have in my bag, if you want them back. By time is strange, I mean that while it has been little over a month since Lukiber has been gone, years may have passed for him. If the nine lords have done as they planned, he will not be the same person you remember him being. From the moment he left with Léviatān, he became someone…something completely different than you remember. You will have to remind him of who he is which I can assure you will feel next to impossible when you try to do so.”
If you're wonder who Jack/Arodin is, he's this guy here: http://www.furaffinity.net/view/5308099/
I'm still working on Family Values, and I'd like to finish it by the end of NaNoWriMo this year.
The synopsis I have for Family Values right now on the NaNoWriMo website is this:
Demons live on earth. They are segregated and treated poorly, as if they were inferior. Hunting them has become a sport, capturing them, a game. The largest Hunter in the world has been killed by one of his own prisoners and one demon has been captured by the devil himself. Now, a journey into hell and back will decide the fate of the world, and possibly existence itself.
I think that's a fairly catchy synopsis, and possibly the best blurb I've written for Family Values since I started writing it. lol
I have no idea if I'll end it at the 50,000 word marker (or shortly after that...I don't want to cut it off mid-sentence, y'know). I want to do multiple books, but I don't know if I want to finish this one with everything being happy-go-lucky at the end, or semi-happy-go-lucky with something dark on the horizon, or even possibly just as everyone is heading off to battle, or something. I don't know.
Anyway, HAVE AN EXCERPT! 8D
Jack smiled again and said, “Well, that’s the question, isn’t it? What does Treachery have to lose if the ultimate act of treachery is committed?” He dropped his smile and a seething scowl replaced it. “I lose what is rightfully mine! The realm of treachery is rightfully mine, because I am Treachery itself! The task with which the gods themselves charged me at the beginning of time is the exact opposite of Pandora’s jar. While the jar unleashed anger, hatred, disease, what have you, the last remainder inside the jar was hope. My task is to grant hope, happiness and success. When the person is finally where they want to be…I destroy everything in one fell swoop.”
Frўdæ looked between his father and the monstrous creature, confused.
“What kind of god would charge anyone or…anything, as the case seems to be, with such an act?”
“Why, yours, of course!” He stood up and started pacing around the living room. “The gods deemed that for every action, there needs to be an equal, but opposite reaction, something Newton discovered, but applied to physics. Even though he was correct in his application, he didn’t know that the same law applies to everything, including spirituality, gods, and literally everything else. Thus, my friends, the moment Pandora allowed her curiosity to get the better of her, I was born.” He stopped pacing and faced the two of them with his hands spread wide and his wicked grin playing across his face again. His smile faltered and he began to slowly pace again. “Unfortunately, my one and only rule is that I cannot lie to the subjects whom I choose to help. In your case, this is actually very fortunate, because this means that when I tell you that I have no intention whatsoever to destroy your hopes and dreams of returning your loved one home…I am telling that absolute truth.”
Frўdæ raised his hand to stop him. “Wait a minute…if you were charged to destroy the hope and all that once it’s been built, how can you tell us that you won’t do it to us, too?”
Arodin stopped pacing again and said, “I can assure you, because I choose who I help. I choose what happens to them. There has been only one other person who I did not destroy afterward, and there were no consequences. If I say that I will not demolish your task once finished, I mean it with all sincerity.”
He walked over the Frўdæ and Kazbyron and placed a hand on each ones shoulder. “I must warn you, my friends,” he said gently, “Time is strange between Hell and earth. Yes, Frўdæ, I left that message in place of your cigarettes, which I have in my bag, if you want them back. By time is strange, I mean that while it has been little over a month since Lukiber has been gone, years may have passed for him. If the nine lords have done as they planned, he will not be the same person you remember him being. From the moment he left with Léviatān, he became someone…something completely different than you remember. You will have to remind him of who he is which I can assure you will feel next to impossible when you try to do so.”
If you're wonder who Jack/Arodin is, he's this guy here: http://www.furaffinity.net/view/5308099/
And the first thing in my inbox?
General | Posted 14 years agoA livestream notice.
Surprised?
No.
Surprised?
No.
Selling my laptop!
General | Posted 14 years agoIf you're not interested, please post a journal in case anyone else IS interested.
Info is here: http://miami.craigslist.org/brw/sys.....626043252.html
Info is here: http://miami.craigslist.org/brw/sys.....626043252.html
For those of you who liked Damien's Vault...
General | Posted 14 years agoI present to you...
DAMIEN'S VAULT! In all it's progressive GLORY! http://soundcloud.com/miseryfields/damiens-vault
I was going to upload it here, but even at such a poor quality of 96kbps, it was still almost twenty megabytes. So, I uploaded the full 212mb file to my soundcloud page.
Enjoy!
Also, yeah, I know the timing for the first keyboard solo is a bit off, I just remixed what I had already done, since I can't record anything at the moment, and I had already condensed all of they keyboards onto one track. Apparently I didn't realize that one bit was off until after it had already been rendered. Oh well, it's not like that's the final version anyway.
DAMIEN'S VAULT! In all it's progressive GLORY! http://soundcloud.com/miseryfields/damiens-vault
I was going to upload it here, but even at such a poor quality of 96kbps, it was still almost twenty megabytes. So, I uploaded the full 212mb file to my soundcloud page.
Enjoy!
Also, yeah, I know the timing for the first keyboard solo is a bit off, I just remixed what I had already done, since I can't record anything at the moment, and I had already condensed all of they keyboards onto one track. Apparently I didn't realize that one bit was off until after it had already been rendered. Oh well, it's not like that's the final version anyway.
Anxiety is kicking in HARDCORE again, and other things...
General | Posted 14 years agoSo, when my lung collapsed, if I sat in a certain position, usually when leaning/lying on my left side, I could feel a...bubbly feeling in my chest. At first, since I didn't know my lung had collapsed, I had no clue what it was. Then, when I was told my lung had collapsed, I immediately realized that the bubbly feeling was actual bubbles of air moving around on the outside of my lung. Since getting out of the hospital, I have been FUCKING PARANOID about that feeling. I was warned through these forums: http://www.blebinfo.co.uk/phpBB2/portal.php that I would feel those bubbly feelings from time to time as I recovered. While I was in the hospital with that damned tube in my chest, I never felt that. When I got out, I would feel the occasional bubble, but it was so rare that it may have been just in my head.
This is where my anxieties come in to play.
I have a carry bag, one of those bags with one strap instead of two. It's a comfortable bag, and it works well enough for my needs. Unfortunately, I have a necklace that sits directly on that strap when it isn't tucked in. When I'm walking, that necklace bounces on that strap. That strap goes over my left shoulder, and all of the weight goes down my left side. So, with the necklace bouncing on that strap, I can feel that vibration all down the left side of my chest and it feels EXACTLY like that bubbly feeling. EXACTLY like it.
Then, even when I'm not wearing that bag, I still occasionally feel that bubbly feeling when walking. Earlier tonight, I could have sworn that my lung had completely re-collapsed. As Kendall and I were walking back inside, I felt that bubbly feeling to the EXTREME and immediately ran for my spirometer I was given at the hospital. Fortunately, it has been a couple of hours since then and I can still get over 4,000 ml in one inhale (the max on this thing is 4,000, so I'm cool with that), and I can do it without pain or anything, but it still terrified the ever loving FUCK out of me.
So, tomorrow I'm going to try to get back to the hospital and have them switch out my prescription for Lexapro to Celexa. Reason being, Lexapro costs $70 for a months worth down at the Winn Dixie, and that's the CHEAPEST I can find around here. Everywhere else is over $100. Celexa, on the other hand, would cost me only $4 for a months worth. FOUR DOLLARS. Now, according to the pharmacist down at the Winn Dixie, the both of them are almost identical. I asked my dad, who has been on more medications for anxiety and depression than I have, and he said that yeah, they are almost the same. I know a few people who say Celexa actually worked better for them than Lexapro or anything else.
I also am going to get another X-Ray while I'm there. I'm fucking sick of these anxieties, and I'm pretty sure you're all sick of reading my EPICALLY EMO journals about being full of the both of them.
On another HORRIBLE note, I got a call from debt collectors today. For my hospital bills. Which haven't even been SENT yet.
Let me reiterate that: I haven't even received the bills yet, and they're already sending debt collectors after me.
WHAT.
Oh, remember that medicaid/medicare system I mentioned a few journals back? No? Oh well. I'm not eligible for it anyway. It didn't mention on any of the fliers or pamphlets that you have to have children or be older than 65 years old or both. Unfortunately, I still have that $16,000 bill from a few years ago when they did the same tests on me four times, and three of those times were refused. MALPRACTICE. I'm being charged $16,000 for MALPRACTICE. What's worse is that because it happened so long ago, the bill still stands, but the ability to call them out on MALPRACTICE does not. How FUCKED UP is that? On a...slightly...not entirely fortunate note, they want to work with me on that bill. They said that if I can pay $800 in one lump sum, then they'll remove the rest of it or something. I wasn't really paying attention, because the bitch was tossing jargon around like a bird trying to break up a piece of bread. You ever seen that? Baseball pitchers don't throw that much shit. So, I didn't understand ninety percent of what she was saying, I just caught something about $800 and getting rid of something something the rest something something something dark side.
I'm hoping I get hired at some place sometime soon so I can apply for health insurance. I'm sick of not having it. I don't give a shit if it's another bill to pay. I really don't. I was talking to my mom and she told me that when she had her cancer surgery back in '97, the total bill was $32,000. She called up her health insurance and was left with a $30 bill. Then she called up AFLAC, and they took care of that $30 remainder.
SHE DIDN'T HAVE TO PAY JACK.
She has had two surgeries since then, and hasn't had to pay for either of those either, because she's been such a good client or whatever.
So, as soon as I can get a job, I'm going to be applying for health insurance.
Wow, this journal went from "I want to not be bleh" to "I want to pay a monthly premium to a company that will pay for me to not be bleh".
Whatever.
I'm going to bed.
This is where my anxieties come in to play.
I have a carry bag, one of those bags with one strap instead of two. It's a comfortable bag, and it works well enough for my needs. Unfortunately, I have a necklace that sits directly on that strap when it isn't tucked in. When I'm walking, that necklace bounces on that strap. That strap goes over my left shoulder, and all of the weight goes down my left side. So, with the necklace bouncing on that strap, I can feel that vibration all down the left side of my chest and it feels EXACTLY like that bubbly feeling. EXACTLY like it.
Then, even when I'm not wearing that bag, I still occasionally feel that bubbly feeling when walking. Earlier tonight, I could have sworn that my lung had completely re-collapsed. As Kendall and I were walking back inside, I felt that bubbly feeling to the EXTREME and immediately ran for my spirometer I was given at the hospital. Fortunately, it has been a couple of hours since then and I can still get over 4,000 ml in one inhale (the max on this thing is 4,000, so I'm cool with that), and I can do it without pain or anything, but it still terrified the ever loving FUCK out of me.
So, tomorrow I'm going to try to get back to the hospital and have them switch out my prescription for Lexapro to Celexa. Reason being, Lexapro costs $70 for a months worth down at the Winn Dixie, and that's the CHEAPEST I can find around here. Everywhere else is over $100. Celexa, on the other hand, would cost me only $4 for a months worth. FOUR DOLLARS. Now, according to the pharmacist down at the Winn Dixie, the both of them are almost identical. I asked my dad, who has been on more medications for anxiety and depression than I have, and he said that yeah, they are almost the same. I know a few people who say Celexa actually worked better for them than Lexapro or anything else.
I also am going to get another X-Ray while I'm there. I'm fucking sick of these anxieties, and I'm pretty sure you're all sick of reading my EPICALLY EMO journals about being full of the both of them.
On another HORRIBLE note, I got a call from debt collectors today. For my hospital bills. Which haven't even been SENT yet.
Let me reiterate that: I haven't even received the bills yet, and they're already sending debt collectors after me.
WHAT.
Oh, remember that medicaid/medicare system I mentioned a few journals back? No? Oh well. I'm not eligible for it anyway. It didn't mention on any of the fliers or pamphlets that you have to have children or be older than 65 years old or both. Unfortunately, I still have that $16,000 bill from a few years ago when they did the same tests on me four times, and three of those times were refused. MALPRACTICE. I'm being charged $16,000 for MALPRACTICE. What's worse is that because it happened so long ago, the bill still stands, but the ability to call them out on MALPRACTICE does not. How FUCKED UP is that? On a...slightly...not entirely fortunate note, they want to work with me on that bill. They said that if I can pay $800 in one lump sum, then they'll remove the rest of it or something. I wasn't really paying attention, because the bitch was tossing jargon around like a bird trying to break up a piece of bread. You ever seen that? Baseball pitchers don't throw that much shit. So, I didn't understand ninety percent of what she was saying, I just caught something about $800 and getting rid of something something the rest something something something dark side.
I'm hoping I get hired at some place sometime soon so I can apply for health insurance. I'm sick of not having it. I don't give a shit if it's another bill to pay. I really don't. I was talking to my mom and she told me that when she had her cancer surgery back in '97, the total bill was $32,000. She called up her health insurance and was left with a $30 bill. Then she called up AFLAC, and they took care of that $30 remainder.
SHE DIDN'T HAVE TO PAY JACK.
She has had two surgeries since then, and hasn't had to pay for either of those either, because she's been such a good client or whatever.
So, as soon as I can get a job, I'm going to be applying for health insurance.
Wow, this journal went from "I want to not be bleh" to "I want to pay a monthly premium to a company that will pay for me to not be bleh".
Whatever.
I'm going to bed.
Things, things and more things.
General | Posted 14 years agoThere are a thousand things constantly going through my mind. Art, music, my health, getting a job, getting an apartment, money, food, how long it's been since I've seen my family, my health again, and so many more things.
You all know that I worry about my health to no end. Lately, I've been worrying a lot more than usual. I think it's because of that spontaneous pneumothorax I had (collapsed lung, for those who don't know).
When I got out of the hospital, I went on a butterscotch binge and ate about 6 bags of that insanely delicious and addictive candy in two weeks. I actually put on a bit of a gut within that time, and now I'm depressed, because I was NEVER given an actual amount of time I should be "taking it easy", so I don't know if I should or could be working out to get rid of this weight.
On top of that, I've been feeling like absolute SHIT lately. My arms have a feeling of general weakness, it's been raining all day today and yesterday, and my joints have been feeling creaky (I thought that happened only to old fogies, damnit...), I've had that fucking pain in my side for over a month, now, and even while I was in the fucking hospital for that week, they couldn't figure out what the fuck it was. My brain has been feeling like molasses and I can't really concentrate on anything.
Because of all of that, I don't feel like going out and looking for a job, because if I can barely get the energy to get dressed and walk out the door, who's going to hire me to sell shit to customers?
So I have no money, I can barely get myself up and out to go get a job, and when I can, no place I go to is hiring.
So because of that, we have no money to get a new place, even though we need to either get out of here or pay an absolutely insane bill which we were never told about before they told us the insane amount of the bill.
I applied for food stamps a while back, and I was successful in getting them. I also got something in the mail stating that I need to call in for an interview the day before the letter was sent. Then, I got something else in the mail the other day stating that I need to apply again because I never called in for that interview. I looked at the information on that letter and the older ones I've received, and ALL of them have this "phone number" listed on them: 1 (000) 000-0000.
SO FUCKING HELPFUL.
So I applied again. Let's just see if that actually works out this time.
I'm just fucking sick of feeling like shit.
You all know that I worry about my health to no end. Lately, I've been worrying a lot more than usual. I think it's because of that spontaneous pneumothorax I had (collapsed lung, for those who don't know).
When I got out of the hospital, I went on a butterscotch binge and ate about 6 bags of that insanely delicious and addictive candy in two weeks. I actually put on a bit of a gut within that time, and now I'm depressed, because I was NEVER given an actual amount of time I should be "taking it easy", so I don't know if I should or could be working out to get rid of this weight.
On top of that, I've been feeling like absolute SHIT lately. My arms have a feeling of general weakness, it's been raining all day today and yesterday, and my joints have been feeling creaky (I thought that happened only to old fogies, damnit...), I've had that fucking pain in my side for over a month, now, and even while I was in the fucking hospital for that week, they couldn't figure out what the fuck it was. My brain has been feeling like molasses and I can't really concentrate on anything.
Because of all of that, I don't feel like going out and looking for a job, because if I can barely get the energy to get dressed and walk out the door, who's going to hire me to sell shit to customers?
So I have no money, I can barely get myself up and out to go get a job, and when I can, no place I go to is hiring.
So because of that, we have no money to get a new place, even though we need to either get out of here or pay an absolutely insane bill which we were never told about before they told us the insane amount of the bill.
I applied for food stamps a while back, and I was successful in getting them. I also got something in the mail stating that I need to call in for an interview the day before the letter was sent. Then, I got something else in the mail the other day stating that I need to apply again because I never called in for that interview. I looked at the information on that letter and the older ones I've received, and ALL of them have this "phone number" listed on them: 1 (000) 000-0000.
SO FUCKING HELPFUL.
So I applied again. Let's just see if that actually works out this time.
I'm just fucking sick of feeling like shit.
Reformatted the computer again
General | Posted 14 years agoThings just weren't working properly, so I said FUCK THIS COUCH and reformatted again. I opted to go for 32x instead of 64x this time. I was sick of having to look for programs in 64x. lol
Let's hope everything works well this time around, eh?
Let's hope everything works well this time around, eh?
I NEED TO GET OVER THIS FUCKING ART BLOCK
General | Posted 14 years agoDoes anyone have any ideas? I'm desperately trying to get over this block. I've forced myself to start drawing a couple of things to try to get back into drawing, I've colored some things, I've been doing everything I know to get over this god damned block, but I just can't fucking do it! I owe art, I'd like to start making art for people again, I want to branch away from doing just a simple character doing a simplistic pose, I want to start doing real backgrounds, but every time I get even the slightest hint of a shade of an idea, it just fucking disappears before I can even pick up my goddamned pencil which is always RIGHT NEXT TO ME.
WHAAAT the FUCK?!
WHAAAT the FUCK?!
THE SUMMONING!
General | Posted 14 years agoBack to Life Bass Test Video!
General | Posted 14 years agoHumpty Dumpty
General | Posted 14 years agoGoing along the older meanings of those two words, one being a type of alcoholic beverage, and the other being a slang for a very clumsy person, we can assume that the rhyme was not actually about an egg, but a drunken man who couldn't overcome his alcoholic addiction. The original (or at least the first printed version) is as such:
"Humpty Dumpty sate on a wall,
Humpti Dumpti had a great fall;
Threescore men and threescore more,
Cannot place Humpty dumpty as he was before."
Taking note of the two different spellings, it would make sense for there to be references to two different things, one being the drink, the other being the drunk.
Or, I could just be reading far too deeply into it.
On the other hand,
"Ladybug, ladybug
Fly away home
Your house is on fire
And your children are gone
All except one
And that's little Ann
For she crawled under
The frying pan"
...This one still makes no fucking sense to me. lol
IN OTHER NEWS
I'm still selling my laptop.
I need at LEAST $500 for it (the original price was $1,499)! The only issue with it is that it doesn't have a Realtek sound card (or any others I can use to record my music), otherwise, it's absolutely amazing! The stats are: Quad core AMD processor, 4 gigs of RAM, 32x OR 64x, 600 gigs of space, large, HD screen, plays Blu-ray discs, any other information can be supplied upon request! Send a private message if interested!
"Humpty Dumpty sate on a wall,
Humpti Dumpti had a great fall;
Threescore men and threescore more,
Cannot place Humpty dumpty as he was before."
Taking note of the two different spellings, it would make sense for there to be references to two different things, one being the drink, the other being the drunk.
Or, I could just be reading far too deeply into it.
On the other hand,
"Ladybug, ladybug
Fly away home
Your house is on fire
And your children are gone
All except one
And that's little Ann
For she crawled under
The frying pan"
...This one still makes no fucking sense to me. lol
IN OTHER NEWS
I'm still selling my laptop.
I need at LEAST $500 for it (the original price was $1,499)! The only issue with it is that it doesn't have a Realtek sound card (or any others I can use to record my music), otherwise, it's absolutely amazing! The stats are: Quad core AMD processor, 4 gigs of RAM, 32x OR 64x, 600 gigs of space, large, HD screen, plays Blu-ray discs, any other information can be supplied upon request! Send a private message if interested!
Thinking about selling my laptop...
General | Posted 14 years agoBut only so I can get a better one.
I found this: http://www.officedepot.com/a/produc.....uter-With-173/
IT IS SO MUCH BETTER THAN MY LAPTOP AND IT'S AT A FRACTION OF THE COST!
I could record and art and do EVERYTHING I WANT!
I just don't have the money for it unless I sell this thing I have right now.
I found this: http://www.officedepot.com/a/produc.....uter-With-173/
IT IS SO MUCH BETTER THAN MY LAPTOP AND IT'S AT A FRACTION OF THE COST!
I could record and art and do EVERYTHING I WANT!
I just don't have the money for it unless I sell this thing I have right now.
Desperately want to art something...
General | Posted 14 years agoSo, in light of that desperate need, I think I might do that 100 these challenge thing that everyone was so focused on a few years ago.
Here's the list I like most:
1. Introduction
2. Love
3. Light
4. Dark
5. Seeking Solace
6. Break Away
7. Heaven
8. Innocence
9. Drive
10. Breathe Again
11. Memory
12. Insanity
13. Misfortune
14. Smile
15. Silence
16. Questioning
17. Blood
18. Rainbow
19. Gray
20. Fortitude
21. Vacation
22. Mother Nature
23. Cat
24. No Time
25. Trouble Lurking
26. Tears
27. Foreign
28. Sorrow
29. Happiness
30. Under the Rain
31. Flowers
32. Night
33. Expectations
34. Stars
35. Hold My Hand
36. Precious Treasure
37. Eyes
38. Abandoned
39. Dreams
40. Rated
41. Teamwork
42. Standing Still
43. Dying
44. Two Roads
45. Illusion
46. Family
47. Creation
48. Childhood
49. Stripes
50. Breaking the Rules
51. Sport
52. Deep in Thought
53. Keeping a Secret
54. Tower
55. Waiting
56. Danger Ahead
57. Sacrifice
58. Kick in the Head
59. No Way Out
60. Rejection
61. Fairy Tale
62. Magic
63. Do Not Disturb
64. Multitasking
65. Horror
66. Traps
67. Playing the Melody
68. Hero
69. Annoyance
70. FUCK [if this theme offends you you may do the alternate theme "Balk"]
71. Obsession
72. Mischief Managed
73. I Can't
74. Are You Challenging Me?
75. Mirror
76. Broken Pieces
77. Test
78. Drink
79. Starvation
80. Words
81. Pen and Paper
82. Can You Hear Me?
83. Heal
84. Out Cold
85. Spiral
86. Seeing Red
87. Food
88. Pain
89. Through the Fire
90. Triangle
91. Drowning
92. All That I Have
93. Give Up
94. Last Hope
95. Advertisement
96. In the Storm
97. Safety First
98. Puzzle
99. Solitude
100. Relaxation
I might do a few of them literally, I might do a few of them metaphorically, I'm not sure.
Anyway, back to talking like a pirate!
YARR!
EDIT: I changed #70, because "67%" is possibly the most stupid prompt I have ever heard of
Here's the list I like most:
1. Introduction
2. Love
3. Light
4. Dark
5. Seeking Solace
6. Break Away
7. Heaven
8. Innocence
9. Drive
10. Breathe Again
11. Memory
12. Insanity
13. Misfortune
14. Smile
15. Silence
16. Questioning
17. Blood
18. Rainbow
19. Gray
20. Fortitude
21. Vacation
22. Mother Nature
23. Cat
24. No Time
25. Trouble Lurking
26. Tears
27. Foreign
28. Sorrow
29. Happiness
30. Under the Rain
31. Flowers
32. Night
33. Expectations
34. Stars
35. Hold My Hand
36. Precious Treasure
37. Eyes
38. Abandoned
39. Dreams
40. Rated
41. Teamwork
42. Standing Still
43. Dying
44. Two Roads
45. Illusion
46. Family
47. Creation
48. Childhood
49. Stripes
50. Breaking the Rules
51. Sport
52. Deep in Thought
53. Keeping a Secret
54. Tower
55. Waiting
56. Danger Ahead
57. Sacrifice
58. Kick in the Head
59. No Way Out
60. Rejection
61. Fairy Tale
62. Magic
63. Do Not Disturb
64. Multitasking
65. Horror
66. Traps
67. Playing the Melody
68. Hero
69. Annoyance
70. FUCK [if this theme offends you you may do the alternate theme "Balk"]
71. Obsession
72. Mischief Managed
73. I Can't
74. Are You Challenging Me?
75. Mirror
76. Broken Pieces
77. Test
78. Drink
79. Starvation
80. Words
81. Pen and Paper
82. Can You Hear Me?
83. Heal
84. Out Cold
85. Spiral
86. Seeing Red
87. Food
88. Pain
89. Through the Fire
90. Triangle
91. Drowning
92. All That I Have
93. Give Up
94. Last Hope
95. Advertisement
96. In the Storm
97. Safety First
98. Puzzle
99. Solitude
100. Relaxation
I might do a few of them literally, I might do a few of them metaphorically, I'm not sure.
Anyway, back to talking like a pirate!
YARR!
EDIT: I changed #70, because "67%" is possibly the most stupid prompt I have ever heard of
*eyepatch*
General | Posted 14 years agoYarr, it be talk like a pirate day!
The Banner
General | Posted 14 years agoI
FUCKING
HATE
IT
FUCKING
HATE
IT
I want to color something
General | Posted 14 years agoSo, if you have something, or know of a picture that needs color, send it my way!
The same rules as my commissions apply here.
I won't do:
-watersports/piss-play
-scat
-babyfur (it's just fucking WRONG)
-fat fur
-inflation
-vore
-scalies (I fucking SUCK at them)
-herms
-copyrighted characters (Mickey Mouse, Bugs Bunny, etc.)
The same rules as my commissions apply here.
I won't do:
-watersports/piss-play
-scat
-babyfur (it's just fucking WRONG)
-fat fur
-inflation
-vore
-scalies (I fucking SUCK at them)
-herms
-copyrighted characters (Mickey Mouse, Bugs Bunny, etc.)
A message to the evening sky...
General | Posted 14 years agoTonight, I am as you are...I am dread and storm and I am hope and light.
I am between the fear that what I wish will now never be, due to my own body waging a war against my will.
I am between happiness that I am alive, that I was able to be found, so close to no longer being at all.
I am between fear of the rest of my life, plagued with pain and uncertainty.
I am between happiness of the knowledge of what has happened, and that it might not ever again befall me.
I am dread and storm.
I am hope and light.
I am between the fear that what I wish will now never be, due to my own body waging a war against my will.
I am between happiness that I am alive, that I was able to be found, so close to no longer being at all.
I am between fear of the rest of my life, plagued with pain and uncertainty.
I am between happiness of the knowledge of what has happened, and that it might not ever again befall me.
I am dread and storm.
I am hope and light.
Lexapro and an amazing nurse
General | Posted 14 years agoWhile I was in the hospital, I mentioned to the nurses that I have anxiety/depression issues, so they put me on a daily dose of Lexapro to help me with it. I normally don't like any kinds of medication or pills or anything like that, but it really did make me feel better. When I was discharged yesterday, the nurse told me I was supposed to have a prescription for it, but she didn't have the paper with her. Knowing that we don't have enough money for it, I told her that was fine, and I generally don't like to take anything for it anyway and that I really don't like pills or medications. She said okay and let me leave without it.
Unfortunately, I didn't realize that I was feeling so good because I was still on it.
Now, I'm feeling the effects of it wearing off, and it's hitting me HARD. I feel like shit. I'm sad, my anxiety is coming back full force and I'm hyperventilating again. One of the nurses, Jen, who is the GREATEST NURSE IN THE WORLD (more on that later), actually put me on the Lexapro BECAUSE I hyperventilate while my anxiety is acting up, and I was in for a collapsed lung. She had a momentary epiphany when I told her about my hyperventilation and immediately put me on it.
Seriously, I can feel everything rushing back, and it's absolutely terrible.
Anyway, I was going to talk about Jen for a bit and let you all know about the greatest nurse in the world.
When I first had the procedure to have the tube inserted into my chest done, I was in the most pain I have ever felt, and the first thing I did was ask if she could stay with me for a little while. I asked, because one of my deepest fears is being alone. She held my hand throughout the procedure and kept saying things like, "you're doing fine", "the worst is over", and all those good things. So, I asked her to stay with me for a while, because I was so afraid. She held my hand with both of hers and said that she'd stay for as long as she could until she had to get back to work, but until then she would stay. I actually started to cry because of, not just the pain, but how kind she was. While I have met some truly kind people, she is honestly right up near the top.
For the rest of that day and the next day, she took over everything when it came to taking care of me. There are two nurses on duty in each wing at all times, one for checking the vitals and bringing things to the patients, another for giving out the medications. Well, Jen did everything for me. She brought me the incentive spirometer a few hours after the procedure and told me what it was for and how it would drastically help me. If you don't know what an incentive spirometer is, here's all the info you'll need: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Incentive_spirometer For the rest of the day, she was hustling and bustling around me, making sure I was using it. The first time, I got only 1,300 ml. The average lung capacity is 6,000 ml, so that was a fraction of what I should be able to do. So, she, being the good nurse, says, "I know you can do better than that, I think you're just worried about how much it might hurt, so I want you to try it again". So I tried again, and got just a little more, 1,500. By the end of the day, I was getting almost 3,000. When she saw, she flailed a little bit and goes, "I am going to sleep SO well tonight!" and gave me a fist bump. The next day was the same thing, really, but I progressed all the way up to 4,000, which is the max for the incentive spirometer. When I got the plunger up all the way, she actually told me she was surprised and proud of how quickly I was able to do so.
When the night shift started at 7pm, it was part of her job to take the new nurse around and show them all of the new patients. When she was showing me to the new nurse, she told her that she had better take good care of me, and she really looked like she meant business when she said so.
Seriously, because of her, I had a great time recovering from this, and I'm actually planning on sending her something along with a thank you card. Not sure what I'd send, though.
Anyway, just posting something for the sake of posting.
Unfortunately, I didn't realize that I was feeling so good because I was still on it.
Now, I'm feeling the effects of it wearing off, and it's hitting me HARD. I feel like shit. I'm sad, my anxiety is coming back full force and I'm hyperventilating again. One of the nurses, Jen, who is the GREATEST NURSE IN THE WORLD (more on that later), actually put me on the Lexapro BECAUSE I hyperventilate while my anxiety is acting up, and I was in for a collapsed lung. She had a momentary epiphany when I told her about my hyperventilation and immediately put me on it.
Seriously, I can feel everything rushing back, and it's absolutely terrible.
Anyway, I was going to talk about Jen for a bit and let you all know about the greatest nurse in the world.
When I first had the procedure to have the tube inserted into my chest done, I was in the most pain I have ever felt, and the first thing I did was ask if she could stay with me for a little while. I asked, because one of my deepest fears is being alone. She held my hand throughout the procedure and kept saying things like, "you're doing fine", "the worst is over", and all those good things. So, I asked her to stay with me for a while, because I was so afraid. She held my hand with both of hers and said that she'd stay for as long as she could until she had to get back to work, but until then she would stay. I actually started to cry because of, not just the pain, but how kind she was. While I have met some truly kind people, she is honestly right up near the top.
For the rest of that day and the next day, she took over everything when it came to taking care of me. There are two nurses on duty in each wing at all times, one for checking the vitals and bringing things to the patients, another for giving out the medications. Well, Jen did everything for me. She brought me the incentive spirometer a few hours after the procedure and told me what it was for and how it would drastically help me. If you don't know what an incentive spirometer is, here's all the info you'll need: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Incentive_spirometer For the rest of the day, she was hustling and bustling around me, making sure I was using it. The first time, I got only 1,300 ml. The average lung capacity is 6,000 ml, so that was a fraction of what I should be able to do. So, she, being the good nurse, says, "I know you can do better than that, I think you're just worried about how much it might hurt, so I want you to try it again". So I tried again, and got just a little more, 1,500. By the end of the day, I was getting almost 3,000. When she saw, she flailed a little bit and goes, "I am going to sleep SO well tonight!" and gave me a fist bump. The next day was the same thing, really, but I progressed all the way up to 4,000, which is the max for the incentive spirometer. When I got the plunger up all the way, she actually told me she was surprised and proud of how quickly I was able to do so.
When the night shift started at 7pm, it was part of her job to take the new nurse around and show them all of the new patients. When she was showing me to the new nurse, she told her that she had better take good care of me, and she really looked like she meant business when she said so.
Seriously, because of her, I had a great time recovering from this, and I'm actually planning on sending her something along with a thank you card. Not sure what I'd send, though.
Anyway, just posting something for the sake of posting.
I'M HOME! I'M FREE FROM THE HOSPITAL!!
General | Posted 14 years agoI got released today! I had an X-Ray yesterday which showed no signs of the collapsed lung, so they took out my chest tube. After another X-Ray this morning showing the same thing, they released me with nothing more than a bandage and a couple of stitches that need to be removed in a week! 8D
In the ER again...
General | Posted 14 years agoI originally came in for my abdominal pain again, but they did a chest/abdomen X-Ray, and found out that I have a partially collapsed lung. Now, I have no idea if this is the same instance of when I thought I had costochondritis back in April, but it feels exactly the same, so it very well may be. It wasn't hurting before I started walking down to the hospital, but halfway here, my chest started to hurt again. So, at least I was headed in the right direction, right?
Fuck, I'm so scared right now. I still don't know why my abdomen hurts, and my left lung is partially collapsed. I am so fucking scared right now, you have no idea...
Fuck, I'm so scared right now. I still don't know why my abdomen hurts, and my left lung is partially collapsed. I am so fucking scared right now, you have no idea...
I WANT RIDDLES!
General | Posted 14 years agoSo riddle me! I promise I'll not use Google to check out the answers!
Seriously, I love riddles, but can't find any good ones. lol
Seriously, I love riddles, but can't find any good ones. lol
So I went to the ER...
General | Posted 14 years agoAnd they did a urinalysis and a blood test. There was no blood in my urine, and my white blood cell count was normal. So, they told me that the only thing I could really do was take ibuprofen and wait it out.
Okay, I guess I'll have to get some ibuprofen tomorrow.
Okay, I guess I'll have to get some ibuprofen tomorrow.
I desperately need $70 or else I can't go to the hospital...
General | Posted 14 years agoSo I went to the "free" clinic today to find out that, to have an appointment with a doctor, I would have to wait until fucking JANUARY, or to go into the urgent care (emergency room), I'd need $70 up front before they would even get near me.
So, I'm opening commissions again. I know I still owe one picture at the moment, and it might take a little while until the pictures get done, but I need this money so I can get this pain checked out. I'm fucking terrified for my life because I have no idea as to what this could be. It's getting worse by the day, and I'm so scared.
Unfortunately, I don't have my PayPal account attached to a bank account, so it would have to be a direct deposit into my account. (Not actually my account, it's Kendall's, but we'd be using his account to pay for it)
Do me a favor and, if you can't help me out, at least pass this around. I really need to get to the hospital, but I don't have the money to do so.
Prices are as follows:
Piece Purchases: these are the prices for pieces I've already done that are in my gallery at http://furaffinity.net/user/demonwerewolf110 or my gallery at http://demonwerewolf110.deviantart.com
sketches - $5
Full coloured pieces - $20
Commissions:
Digital
Digital Sketch - 1 character - $10
Digital Sketch - Simple Background - $20
Coloured Digital Drawing - 1 Character - $25
Coloured Digital Drawing w/ Background - $30
Traditional
Traditional Sketch - 1 character - $10
Traditional Sketch - Simple Background - $25
Coloured Traditional Drawing - 1 Character - $30
Coloured Traditional Drawing w/ Background - $40
ALSO, KEEP IN MIND THAT I STILL HAVE AN ALBUM FOR SALE FOR $10 EACH, SO IF YOU DON'T WANT ART, THERE'S ALWAYS THAT, TOO!
So, I'm opening commissions again. I know I still owe one picture at the moment, and it might take a little while until the pictures get done, but I need this money so I can get this pain checked out. I'm fucking terrified for my life because I have no idea as to what this could be. It's getting worse by the day, and I'm so scared.
Unfortunately, I don't have my PayPal account attached to a bank account, so it would have to be a direct deposit into my account. (Not actually my account, it's Kendall's, but we'd be using his account to pay for it)
Do me a favor and, if you can't help me out, at least pass this around. I really need to get to the hospital, but I don't have the money to do so.
Prices are as follows:
Piece Purchases: these are the prices for pieces I've already done that are in my gallery at http://furaffinity.net/user/demonwerewolf110 or my gallery at http://demonwerewolf110.deviantart.com
sketches - $5
Full coloured pieces - $20
Commissions:
Digital
Digital Sketch - 1 character - $10
Digital Sketch - Simple Background - $20
Coloured Digital Drawing - 1 Character - $25
Coloured Digital Drawing w/ Background - $30
Traditional
Traditional Sketch - 1 character - $10
Traditional Sketch - Simple Background - $25
Coloured Traditional Drawing - 1 Character - $30
Coloured Traditional Drawing w/ Background - $40
ALSO, KEEP IN MIND THAT I STILL HAVE AN ALBUM FOR SALE FOR $10 EACH, SO IF YOU DON'T WANT ART, THERE'S ALWAYS THAT, TOO!
