Life is change and growth, a never ending cycle of life death and rebirth. Represented by the ouroboros, a dragon eating its own tail, This last month has been a stressful time for me a time of change and turmoil. I have been trying to put my life back together and the more I try to put it back to the way it was the more I realize I am not the same person I was. I have changed alot and I feel like I am a better person because of it...and the same thing applies to this *gestures at my FA page* For along time I have been trying to get back into this getting back to being the same dragon I used to, and the more I try to do it the more I feel like a stranger. I have out grown this skin and it time I shed it so I can grow once again. So after alot of thinking and soul searching I am gonna be leaving FA. Not like anyone will really care and I dont know why I am even bothering to make this journal but I didnt want to just disappear with out giving a explanation as to why.My skype will also be changing. What and where I will go I really dont know. But this is the last thing I will be doing on this account, if you wanna sty in contact me just leave a message I will check this account for a few days but after that I will be gone.

So this I good bye form this dragon. May the sun be on your back, The wind under your wings, and may your prey never hear you coming.

Thats really all I have to say...*sighs and curls up tight*

A friend of mine showed me this music video and I can honestly I felt my IQ drop when I watched it.....So Yeah

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jn_R-tu8xGE

Post the worst music videos you can find.

I finally got a comp so I am back online and a few updates relaxed for school so I will be able to be more active on FA and skype. Which is a great thing because for the last year I haven't been limited on my abilities to access the web. and I basicly disappeared heh, but I have finally returned.
Now for updates on life I have gone back to college in hopes of finishing my degree and graduating. Which is a good thing cause I need to finish school and it helps push me out of my comfort zone. I am trying to work though my social anxieties wich is proving difficult because I am very shy and extremely antisocial I open up I am fine but it is really hard for me too meet new people and most of the people I made friends with in college have dropped out or graduated so I reallly dont know anyone anymore heh. Also talking to people is very odd because I am very open about things that make most people uncomfortable, I am also going to be more active on FA and skype because most of the time I will be sitting around the campus cause I have 2 hour breaks between my class. So I am going to be trying to reconnect with my friends and I am always happy to meet new friends and once I open up I am kind and friendly so If you wanna drop me a message or wanna talk I tend to be lurking around so don't be scared I don't bite....<.=.<...at least no where it will show heh.. But yeah I am always glad to meet new furs if you wanna talk to me on skype add me. aaand I never know how to end jornals so I will end it like this. ^.=.^

For christmas i wish i could have!
1. My mate redfang and I cuddling as chibis.
My mates ref: http://www.furaffinity.net/view/5198620/ and this for my mates headshot http://www.furaffinity.net/view/5176229/ and my ref: http://www.furaffinity.net/view/5351335/(my tail is way too thin in this ref) and my headshot that I like better http://www.furaffinity.net/view/5176229/
2. Me as a chibi on my back with my paws in the air, going "can I haz belly wubs?"
My ref: http://www.furaffinity.net/view/5351335/ (my tail is way too thin in this ref) and my headshot that I like better http://www.furaffinity.net/view/5176229/
3.Me on all fours with my tail raised so you can see my tailhole and my cock hard while I am looking back.
My ref: http://www.furaffinity.net/view/5351335/ (my tail is way too thin in this ref) and my headshot that I like better http://www.furaffinity.net/view/5176229/
Thank you so much ^.=.^

Thanksgiving is the time of yer to give hanks for all the great things in your life. Looking back at the past year and half and the how drasticly my life has changed I have lots of people I have to be thankfull to have in my life. Without them I can honesly say I wouldnt be here today....You all know me as fun loving dragon that jokes around and has a good time. I wish I could say that I have always been like that but its not the case. If any of you meet me alittle over a year ago you wouldnt have know who I was...For a few years I was trying to figure out who and what I was. I wasent really comfortable with my sexuality and I was lurking on the edge of the furry fandom to scared to join and admit to myself what I was. I had a few friends in school but I couldnt talk to them about my problems because I was scared how they would react and that they would hate me and think i was a freak....I had a cold empty void my chest that ached constatly. I was depressed and I didnt care if I lived or died I tried to numb the pain by getting drunk or getting stoned. It didnt fill the void but I was able to forget about it for a while and feel happy even though I felt worse when I did sober up. but that just made me wanna do it more and more this went on for about a year. Nothing ever made me happy and all I saw in my future was more pain and loneiness. I detested life and the act of living was depressing. I wanted to die.....I there were a few times I did almost end it all. I was living my life waiting for it all to end intill about september of last year. I was depressed and I got shitface drunk I went outside sat in a chair in my driveway lit a cigeratte leaned back looking up at the moon with a knife pressed against my neck trying to think of a reason to not to end it. I sat there for a longtime waiting for a answer..... I decided I would live for one more year and on my birthday if things didnt get better I would finally end my life and end my pain. The a few days later I worked up the nerve to tentivly take my first step into the fandom by joining the bad dragon forums.That day is when everything changed for the better, I truely found myself, I met the love of my life and I met people who understood me and became my family.

A few days after I joined the forum I met another dragon by the name of Tem. He was the first person I meet in the fandom that I connected with and he became my first friend in a long time. He is a truely wonderfull friend and a great guy. He helped me take my first step into the fandom. He helped me get into the fandom and I can never put into words how much he helped me.

I also met my first mate fleshy about the sametime I meet Tem. He was a wonderfull mate and a great friend. Our relationship wasent very long but we left on good terms and we remained friends. Fleshy went to army basic training a few months ago I haven been able to talk to him for a while and I hope he is safe and happy.

Then the biggest change happened in my life I met Redfang the love of my life. I cant really put into words the feelings I have for red. He is the guiding light in my life leading me though the darkness. When I am with him I feel whole and complete and truely happy. I love him more then I can explain and I will love him intill the uiverse ends and a eternity after words. I feel safe in his arms and when I am with him I can forget about my past and look to my future feeling the joy of spendng it with him. I love you Red and nothing will everchange that.

Soon after I fell in love with Red he introduced me to another important person in my life a wonderfull little foxy by the name of shini. Shini is a sweet foxy and a wonderfull friend who I love very much even if I tease him feircly. Shini is family to me and I glad to have meet someone like shini and overjoyed to be able to have him in my family. I love him and I will always be there if he needs me.

Soon after meeting shini I was introduced to another important person in my life a fun loving wolf by the name of Kaza. Kaza is a great friend who I can joke around with and is nearly as pervy as I am. He is truely wonderfull caring guy who I can make dirty jokes with and share funny stories with. I am lucky to have meet him and I love kaza very much and he is family to me and I will alway be there for him.

Shini and Kaza are some of the closest people I have to family I love them both very much I would do anything for them.<3

Scion and Zeric are two other bros that I have they are two great friends and I am happy for them being togther and I wish them many happy fullfilling years togther. They are amazing friends and even better bros.

Mauro is another bro that I met this year he is great friend and a great magic player. I had alot of fun talking to him and paling around with him. He is a great bro and I wish him many happy years.

Another great bro I have is Tobi even though I dont get to talk to him as often as I would like to but it dosent make him anyless important in my life. He great friend and you wont find anyone else like him in the world.

There are also many people that I have meet recently or came back in contact with there is my bro nekari and his mate preston to wonderfull friends.
Lenny the nerd a great guy and a better friend. You dont find many people as caring as him in the world.
My big cuddly dragon bro atamaru he is a big cuddle bug and a awesome bro.
There is also my friend Zek he is a great friend to me a Red and he is a great friend and a wondrfull guy.

All these people are like family to me and I love them all very much and I can honestly say
Iwouldnt be here if it wasent for them, I love you all and I would be lost with out you. Rawr<3

and sorry for any spelling and grammer errors it is late and I am tired.

Aliit ori'shya tal'din

Using only 3 words, what would you say to me?

Note: If you comment, please copy and paste this in a journal of yours so I may comment on yours as well.