So depressed....due to lack of work and direction in life...
Posted 4 years agoSo depressed right now from no job and lack of direction. Gods it's hard to find a job that would hire me with my limitations right now. Get passed up so much thanks to that darned neck injury. Money is so tight so often that I toy with the idea of selling all the characters I have (including my Sona Azraell <Both versions>) just so I had some cash so I could get my family off my back. I feel like such a disappointment so often...... I have a Bachelors and an Associates Degree yet cannot find a job of any kind....much less a job I could stay at for any length of time.
Part of this has pushed me towards even stopping what RPs I do have going (only a couple atm). As well as just leaving or hiding away for a while.....just to gather my thoughts and stuff.
I really wish I knew what to do.....so tempted to sell off my characters.....
Even started selling off my magic collection and debating on quitting playing with friends (partially as the delta variant is bad news and I have a feeling none of my friends have gotten the shot or are willing to wear masks....I am at a med/high risk of bad news if I catch any form of the disease). I'm so torn.....and then on top of my neck now my ankles are giving me problems (can't stand in one place for more than ten to twenty minutes without being in severe pain).
Don't worry about me just figured I'd say something....since I tend to be a bit spacey lately and distant. Just kind of out of it lately.....with all that is going on....
HUGS yall <3
Part of this has pushed me towards even stopping what RPs I do have going (only a couple atm). As well as just leaving or hiding away for a while.....just to gather my thoughts and stuff.
I really wish I knew what to do.....so tempted to sell off my characters.....
Even started selling off my magic collection and debating on quitting playing with friends (partially as the delta variant is bad news and I have a feeling none of my friends have gotten the shot or are willing to wear masks....I am at a med/high risk of bad news if I catch any form of the disease). I'm so torn.....and then on top of my neck now my ankles are giving me problems (can't stand in one place for more than ten to twenty minutes without being in severe pain).
Don't worry about me just figured I'd say something....since I tend to be a bit spacey lately and distant. Just kind of out of it lately.....with all that is going on....
HUGS yall <3
Free Raffle posted by Nightarm
Posted 4 years agoThis fellow has an interesting art style and hosting a full body art raffle https://www.furaffinity.net/view/43129564/ check him out...drop a fave and a follow.
*HUGS* <3
*HUGS* <3
Birthday raffle by Elerdren
Posted 4 years agoPlease check it out and enter. Plus show them tons of love on their brithday. BIG HUGS yall
Link to the wonderful event:
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/42857472/
Link to the wonderful event:
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/42857472/
MortyHill ~ Free Raffle celebrating 300 watchers ~
Posted 4 years agoThere is a raffle going on at
MortyHill 's
The link to their post about how to enter and the rules are here:
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/42619988/
So go on over drop them a watch, a fave, a post, and maybe a journal on it to get entered. Well worth your time so please head on over. Maybe even while there check out their gallery and stuff. But most of all show them some love.
*BIG HUGS yall*

The link to their post about how to enter and the rules are here:
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/42619988/
So go on over drop them a watch, a fave, a post, and maybe a journal on it to get entered. Well worth your time so please head on over. Maybe even while there check out their gallery and stuff. But most of all show them some love.
*BIG HUGS yall*
Sigh...Valentine's day heartbreak....
Posted 4 years ago40+ years old...a virgin.....never been on a date....never been kissed.
Sucks being alone. Especially when there is no end to the loneliness in sight.
Such is life. Just pick up the pieces and keep moving forward alone and wondering if I'm meant to find true love.
Hope y'all had a great Valentine's day. Only thing that lifts my spirits lately is knowing those I care about are happy and healthy.
HUGS Y'ALL! <3
Sucks being alone. Especially when there is no end to the loneliness in sight.
Such is life. Just pick up the pieces and keep moving forward alone and wondering if I'm meant to find true love.
Hope y'all had a great Valentine's day. Only thing that lifts my spirits lately is knowing those I care about are happy and healthy.
HUGS Y'ALL! <3
Wishing my friends and everyone the best start to a new y...
Posted 4 years agoJust wanted to wish my friends and everyone the best start to the new year possible. I hope your year gets off to an awesome start. Truly wishing yall the best and truly want the best for all of you. Thanks everyone for being so awesome.
BIG HUGS and tons of LOVE to yall.
~Azzy
BIG HUGS and tons of LOVE to yall.
~Azzy
Will have to see how this goes....
Posted 5 years agoWill have to see how this goes when I get my Christmas gift this year. I'm getting a drawing tablet for Christmas. Its been so long since I have drawn anything at all. So will have to see how this goes. I know its a spoiler knowing what you are getting but hopefully this pulls me out of my Depression by giving me something to do.
I know I'm not a great artist in the least at all. So this will be very interesting for me. But I need something to do and writing is a nice escape but I need something more. So who knows have a lot to learn as never was much a of a character artist before but I want to work towards doing stuff again and maybe posting some of my own work on here. So excited and anxious for Christmas to come.
Only problem I have now is I have a tiny desk so will have to figure out where I will be setting this up.
At least it feels like one thing is going right this year.....crosses fingers and knocks on wood hoping for the best.
I know I'm not a great artist in the least at all. So this will be very interesting for me. But I need something to do and writing is a nice escape but I need something more. So who knows have a lot to learn as never was much a of a character artist before but I want to work towards doing stuff again and maybe posting some of my own work on here. So excited and anxious for Christmas to come.
Only problem I have now is I have a tiny desk so will have to figure out where I will be setting this up.
At least it feels like one thing is going right this year.....crosses fingers and knocks on wood hoping for the best.
2020 the dumpster fire....
Posted 5 years agoTo say it's been a bad year for us all is an understatement. So many things have gone wrong this year.
For me, it's the realization that my non-online friends will all be out of my life by the end of the year hurts the most. But we have all drifted apart so much. Some I will be very sad to see go. Others not so much after finding out some stuff about them. But it seems like 2021 will be a new year I guess and a new starting point...as all my old friends will likely not be in my life anymore. It hurts so much to think about and has made me incredibly depressed for the last three months. At this point, I do not know what to do or even how to start over....my shy nature makes making friends away from online a hard thing to do.
I guess 2021 will be even more lonely in RL for me than 2020 was with its lockdowns. Such is life and such is the struggle these days....and who knows 2020 isn't over there are no guarantee that I will make it to 2021 (cause one thing is for sure there are no true guarantees in life).
SIGHS......
Lights the match and tosses it into the 2020 dumpster full of memories of my RL friends.....
Time to move on maybe........
For me, it's the realization that my non-online friends will all be out of my life by the end of the year hurts the most. But we have all drifted apart so much. Some I will be very sad to see go. Others not so much after finding out some stuff about them. But it seems like 2021 will be a new year I guess and a new starting point...as all my old friends will likely not be in my life anymore. It hurts so much to think about and has made me incredibly depressed for the last three months. At this point, I do not know what to do or even how to start over....my shy nature makes making friends away from online a hard thing to do.
I guess 2021 will be even more lonely in RL for me than 2020 was with its lockdowns. Such is life and such is the struggle these days....and who knows 2020 isn't over there are no guarantee that I will make it to 2021 (cause one thing is for sure there are no true guarantees in life).
SIGHS......
Lights the match and tosses it into the 2020 dumpster full of memories of my RL friends.....
Time to move on maybe........
Another year older....sigh
Posted 5 years agoAnother year older. Meh. After a while birthdays just become just another day of the year LOL
Also still have plenty of characters in the gallery who are available....possibly. Just in case no one saw that. (out of town today so replies will be slow)
https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/9625922/
Also still have plenty of characters in the gallery who are available....possibly. Just in case no one saw that. (out of town today so replies will be slow)
https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/9625922/
Will "entertain" offers on characters I have....
Posted 5 years agoWill entertain offers for the characters I have in my gallery. There is a list of "not for sale" and "maybes" I have made up which is in this journal: https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/9624182/ .
I reserve the right to turn down offers if I don't feel its enough or just unsure I want to part with the character or if I have been contacted by the artist who created them(if they want them back or the original owner wants them back). But I am opening this up since I am getting asked about some characters after I posted that list.
I'm sorry if I do not have exact prices but there are characters that I bought so long ago and sadly I have not kept notes on them as never ever thought I would let any of them go. Sadly times change and life sometimes sees fit to throw you an unwanted curveball making the choice for you.
I will be sad to see them go and it will hurt to let them go. But alas my hand is being forced. I just hope the ones I part with will find a great new home where they will be loved and cared for better than I could do (like new art and maybe even a better background or something for them that will breathe a new life into them).
I will take offers in notes or comments depending on what you like and will post here who has left my possession in the comments section here. I'm so sad I have to do this but alas life is choosing for me.
(If I turn down the offer please don't take it to heart or anything. The last thing I want is to hurt feelings or anything this is hard enough as it is. You can try again unless I just say I sadly do not want to part with them.)
Once again sorry if I do turn an offer down. This is hard and my heart aches over this as is but the last thing I want is to hurt someone.
I reserve the right to turn down offers if I don't feel its enough or just unsure I want to part with the character or if I have been contacted by the artist who created them(if they want them back or the original owner wants them back). But I am opening this up since I am getting asked about some characters after I posted that list.
I'm sorry if I do not have exact prices but there are characters that I bought so long ago and sadly I have not kept notes on them as never ever thought I would let any of them go. Sadly times change and life sometimes sees fit to throw you an unwanted curveball making the choice for you.
I will be sad to see them go and it will hurt to let them go. But alas my hand is being forced. I just hope the ones I part with will find a great new home where they will be loved and cared for better than I could do (like new art and maybe even a better background or something for them that will breathe a new life into them).
I will take offers in notes or comments depending on what you like and will post here who has left my possession in the comments section here. I'm so sad I have to do this but alas life is choosing for me.
(If I turn down the offer please don't take it to heart or anything. The last thing I want is to hurt feelings or anything this is hard enough as it is. You can try again unless I just say I sadly do not want to part with them.)
Once again sorry if I do turn an offer down. This is hard and my heart aches over this as is but the last thing I want is to hurt someone.
List of not for sale and may come up for sale should....
Posted 5 years agoList of not for sale and may come up for sale should I need to sell any characters to make some money for bills and such.
< This list is just up to answer some questions. I have not made the decision as to whether I'm selling or not yet. But I might entertain offers right now.....just to gauge interest or maybe sell one or two. >
The not for sale list:
1. Azraell <paid around $200-250+> (all versions right now as well he's my sona so that much is obvious)
2. Big Wish (held in case owner wants him back) https://www.furaffinity.net/view/36990739/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/36990651/ , https://www.furaffinity.net/view/36990528/
3. Fredrick (held for original owner) https://www.furaffinity.net/view/36901851/
4. Rick "Meathead" (held for original owner and cause I like the big guy) https://www.furaffinity.net/view/36901851/
5. Daniel Red <paid $80-90 I think> (cause I'm a sucker for FF7 and big hunks...as well as love this artist) https://www.furaffinity.net/view/36346483/
6. Greg the Monkey (got him from a good friend...hands off) https://www.furaffinity.net/view/33147353/
7. Griffin "Blizzard" (got him from an awesome friend so hands off please) https://www.furaffinity.net/view/32923010/
8. Hung Chu Yuin (got from a friend so hands off thanks) https://www.furaffinity.net/view/32906668/
9. Reo Nagata (got from a friend....) https://www.furaffinity.net/view/32800733/
10. Giraffe Sisters (all versions) <paid $145+ I think> https://www.furaffinity.net/view/32735237/
11. Big Boss <paid $60-75> (all versions as TKC killed these pieces and love me some gorilla hunks) https://www.furaffinity.net/view/31042763/
12. Norton Manor <paid $125+ I believe> (love this guy and would only ever let go of him if the home was correct.... maybe) https://www.furaffinity.net/gallery.....7/Norton-Manor
13. House of Incubi <around $250-350 for all the art> (would only let go back to Whatinsomnia since they were his creation) https://www.furaffinity.net/gallery.....ouse-of-Incubi
14. Shamar <For all art around $50-60> https://www.furaffinity.net/view/18023611/
Debating on keeping (but might let go of if price is right...maybe):
1. Knight of the Wind Goo <I think I paid around $35-45> https://www.furaffinity.net/view/33007410/
2. Ban'tu Akoa <I think I paid around $45> (I love yautja) https://www.furaffinity.net/view/33044172/
3. Crying magical deer (got from a friend) https://www.furaffinity.net/gallery.....g-Magical-Deer
4. Brett "Goldenmane" <Think I paid $50-65< (I want to keep at least one character by this artist around as I love their art) https://www.furaffinity.net/view/26390789/
5. Thomas "Regen" <Think I paid $100-150> (same as #4 this is a big maybe as in love with his design) https://www.furaffinity.net/gallery.....-Regen-Yasooka
6. Pryde <Think I paid $75-125> (I love him so would be hard to let him go) https://www.furaffinity.net/gallery.....r/232735/Pryde
7. Rufus <I think I paid $50> (cause he's cute like his artist) https://www.furaffinity.net/view/24290391/
8. Faith <With all the art think I paid $150-170> https://www.furaffinity.net/gallery.....ergaless-Faith
9. Vesper <I think with all the art I paid $45-70> https://www.furaffinity.net/gallery...../821113/Vesper
10. Andrew Martin <I think I paid around $75-100> (used him often in a RP) https://www.furaffinity.net/view/19890073/
11. Stephen <I think I paid $35> (used him often in a RP) https://www.furaffinity.net/view/19889927/
The others in the gallery are pretty much open to offers for the most part, I think. At least right now they are.
I'm just putting this out there and I will say some that are on the maybes and Not for sale may open up fully. But the maybes are up for offers. At least when I open all of these characters up for sale that is. Still in the debating phase of selling or not.
< This list is just up to answer some questions. I have not made the decision as to whether I'm selling or not yet. But I might entertain offers right now.....just to gauge interest or maybe sell one or two. >
The not for sale list:
1. Azraell <paid around $200-250+> (all versions right now as well he's my sona so that much is obvious)
2. Big Wish (held in case owner wants him back) https://www.furaffinity.net/view/36990739/
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/36990651/ , https://www.furaffinity.net/view/36990528/
3. Fredrick (held for original owner) https://www.furaffinity.net/view/36901851/
4. Rick "Meathead" (held for original owner and cause I like the big guy) https://www.furaffinity.net/view/36901851/
5. Daniel Red <paid $80-90 I think> (cause I'm a sucker for FF7 and big hunks...as well as love this artist) https://www.furaffinity.net/view/36346483/
6. Greg the Monkey (got him from a good friend...hands off) https://www.furaffinity.net/view/33147353/
7. Griffin "Blizzard" (got him from an awesome friend so hands off please) https://www.furaffinity.net/view/32923010/
8. Hung Chu Yuin (got from a friend so hands off thanks) https://www.furaffinity.net/view/32906668/
9. Reo Nagata (got from a friend....) https://www.furaffinity.net/view/32800733/
10. Giraffe Sisters (all versions) <paid $145+ I think> https://www.furaffinity.net/view/32735237/
11. Big Boss <paid $60-75> (all versions as TKC killed these pieces and love me some gorilla hunks) https://www.furaffinity.net/view/31042763/
12. Norton Manor <paid $125+ I believe> (love this guy and would only ever let go of him if the home was correct.... maybe) https://www.furaffinity.net/gallery.....7/Norton-Manor
13. House of Incubi <around $250-350 for all the art> (would only let go back to Whatinsomnia since they were his creation) https://www.furaffinity.net/gallery.....ouse-of-Incubi
14. Shamar <For all art around $50-60> https://www.furaffinity.net/view/18023611/
Debating on keeping (but might let go of if price is right...maybe):
1. Knight of the Wind Goo <I think I paid around $35-45> https://www.furaffinity.net/view/33007410/
2. Ban'tu Akoa <I think I paid around $45> (I love yautja) https://www.furaffinity.net/view/33044172/
3. Crying magical deer (got from a friend) https://www.furaffinity.net/gallery.....g-Magical-Deer
4. Brett "Goldenmane" <Think I paid $50-65< (I want to keep at least one character by this artist around as I love their art) https://www.furaffinity.net/view/26390789/
5. Thomas "Regen" <Think I paid $100-150> (same as #4 this is a big maybe as in love with his design) https://www.furaffinity.net/gallery.....-Regen-Yasooka
6. Pryde <Think I paid $75-125> (I love him so would be hard to let him go) https://www.furaffinity.net/gallery.....r/232735/Pryde
7. Rufus <I think I paid $50> (cause he's cute like his artist) https://www.furaffinity.net/view/24290391/
8. Faith <With all the art think I paid $150-170> https://www.furaffinity.net/gallery.....ergaless-Faith
9. Vesper <I think with all the art I paid $45-70> https://www.furaffinity.net/gallery...../821113/Vesper
10. Andrew Martin <I think I paid around $75-100> (used him often in a RP) https://www.furaffinity.net/view/19890073/
11. Stephen <I think I paid $35> (used him often in a RP) https://www.furaffinity.net/view/19889927/
The others in the gallery are pretty much open to offers for the most part, I think. At least right now they are.
I'm just putting this out there and I will say some that are on the maybes and Not for sale may open up fully. But the maybes are up for offers. At least when I open all of these characters up for sale that is. Still in the debating phase of selling or not.
Debating on selling most of my characters.....hmmmm
Posted 5 years agoCurrently debating on selling or rehoming most of my characters in my gallery. Right now its just a debate. Sadly not working and money is super tight. So at some point this may become a reality whether I like it or not. No matter how much it hurts.
I do have some time yet to decide.....but the thought has entered my mind of late. As for rehoming....there are a few that would go back to their original owner (like the incubi's which will hurt a lot to let them go but I owe that much to the their creator).
This will be a hard decision for me so I think I will need to think on it. But reality is what it is right now, with lack of job, lack of stimulus and all it may be my reality that I have to accept at this point no matter how much it will hurt.
As some can tell I have let go of a few of my characters recently....to try and make ends meet or help a friend in need. This is kind of what brought me to start thinking about this stuff.
My main thing is when I let go of them if that happens is that they find a new home where they will be loved and possibly there forever. To me they are more than just characters....to me they deserve to be happy. Maybe a place where they will get more attention and maybe more art than I could have ever dreamed of doing.
Whelp I rambled enough just wanted to get that out there that I am thinking about this. Will make an official post should I ever need to bite that bullet.
HUGS Yall <3
I do have some time yet to decide.....but the thought has entered my mind of late. As for rehoming....there are a few that would go back to their original owner (like the incubi's which will hurt a lot to let them go but I owe that much to the their creator).
This will be a hard decision for me so I think I will need to think on it. But reality is what it is right now, with lack of job, lack of stimulus and all it may be my reality that I have to accept at this point no matter how much it will hurt.
As some can tell I have let go of a few of my characters recently....to try and make ends meet or help a friend in need. This is kind of what brought me to start thinking about this stuff.
My main thing is when I let go of them if that happens is that they find a new home where they will be loved and possibly there forever. To me they are more than just characters....to me they deserve to be happy. Maybe a place where they will get more attention and maybe more art than I could have ever dreamed of doing.
Whelp I rambled enough just wanted to get that out there that I am thinking about this. Will make an official post should I ever need to bite that bullet.
HUGS Yall <3
Hacked....again...sigh
Posted 5 years agoMy Twitter has been getting hacked for a couple years now. It was finally suspended last week. Thusly cannot be on Twitter anymore.
Tonight my email got hacked and they used my YouTube account to troll someone. Only found out as my phone gets updates live from my email. I then saw there were these random responses coming off some YouTube channel. So knowing that my email and YouTube are connected I managed to get back in using authenticator and reset my passwords.
Such is my life lately. What's next?
Tonight my email got hacked and they used my YouTube account to troll someone. Only found out as my phone gets updates live from my email. I then saw there were these random responses coming off some YouTube channel. So knowing that my email and YouTube are connected I managed to get back in using authenticator and reset my passwords.
Such is my life lately. What's next?
My luck strikes again...
Posted 5 years agoWhelp currently closing several accounts and closing out several cards. Another attempt was made to steal my identity the other day. I have told a couple of my friends about it. Alas this is what happens when two sites get hacked and your data is stolen then posted on dark web. It was just a matter of time before someone tried again. But when Experian and HTH got hacked my info appeared on dark web after. I have a subscription to a company looking out for my info thankfully and that's how I found out about this recent attempt. Sigh...just the way my luck is I guess. No worries I will get through this as this is not the first time and likely not the last time this will happen.
This is why I have been a little busy and distant as there is tons to do with this. Had to happen now of course when I'm looking into college again....yeah 40 yrs old and maybe going to college again for something different from what I have with my bachelors and associates in.
*HUGS yall*
This is why I have been a little busy and distant as there is tons to do with this. Had to happen now of course when I'm looking into college again....yeah 40 yrs old and maybe going to college again for something different from what I have with my bachelors and associates in.
*HUGS yall*
Free Raffle posted by ya-ong
Posted 5 years agoHello,
Just saw someone I have been watching for a bit now hit a milestone and is offering entry for a free adopt (can be seen here: https://www.furaffinity.net/view/37094212/ ). All that one needs to do is follow them (till at least the raffle is over or you will lose your entries) and fave the adopt. For an extra entry all you have to do is what I just did here and share a journal entry talking about it and linking to it. Its that simple. And to win a wonderful adopt while also supporting a very nice person hitting a milestone its so easy so please do it. Thanks for your time and everything. HUGS yall
Thanks,
Azraell
Just saw someone I have been watching for a bit now hit a milestone and is offering entry for a free adopt (can be seen here: https://www.furaffinity.net/view/37094212/ ). All that one needs to do is follow them (till at least the raffle is over or you will lose your entries) and fave the adopt. For an extra entry all you have to do is what I just did here and share a journal entry talking about it and linking to it. Its that simple. And to win a wonderful adopt while also supporting a very nice person hitting a milestone its so easy so please do it. Thanks for your time and everything. HUGS yall
Thanks,
Azraell
My mom just had a heart attack
Posted 5 years agoSo out of it right now... Feel so lost...
I got the phone call early this morning. My parents are in florida right now on vacation for the month. They were at a bar last night with some friends watching the race. Well from what my dad told me as our conversation was very brief....she had a heart attack last night. She is in the hospital recovering and they put a couple stints in last night. So she is doing better I think. But by the sounds of it my mom and dad are heading back either tomorrow when she gets out or in a couple days. Its a two plus day drive from florida back home.
I was texting back and forth with her last night as had a few things that happened here that I thought she would want to know about. Bills, drama, etc. Now I feel horrible that I may have added to that and may have even caused what happened in some odd way. Being overly empathetic as I am I'm super down and have chest pains all my own (hoping its heart burn as no insurance here). Could also be from when I fell down the basement stairs the other day as have been hurting from that for a couple days now. So to say its a bad day today is an understatement for me. So may retreat for a while from here and the net in general as I have lots to think about.
HUGS yall and wishing yall the best.
I got the phone call early this morning. My parents are in florida right now on vacation for the month. They were at a bar last night with some friends watching the race. Well from what my dad told me as our conversation was very brief....she had a heart attack last night. She is in the hospital recovering and they put a couple stints in last night. So she is doing better I think. But by the sounds of it my mom and dad are heading back either tomorrow when she gets out or in a couple days. Its a two plus day drive from florida back home.
I was texting back and forth with her last night as had a few things that happened here that I thought she would want to know about. Bills, drama, etc. Now I feel horrible that I may have added to that and may have even caused what happened in some odd way. Being overly empathetic as I am I'm super down and have chest pains all my own (hoping its heart burn as no insurance here). Could also be from when I fell down the basement stairs the other day as have been hurting from that for a couple days now. So to say its a bad day today is an understatement for me. So may retreat for a while from here and the net in general as I have lots to think about.
HUGS yall and wishing yall the best.
Another year older....another year sadder.....
Posted 6 years agoYay....another year older today.
Yet another year I feel sadder as still living with my parents. Just lost my job with pepsi and now stuck with a weight restriction until I can afford surgery. Aren't birthdays fun....
Oh well just have to keep on smiling and keeping my head up. Somehow my luck has to change....
HUGS yall hope you are all having wonderful ones. Wishing all of you the very best.
~Azraell
PS.... please no gifts. Happy Brithday wishes are more then enough for me. Never was one huge on getting gifts....love giving more then receiving. Thanks for understanding. <3
Yet another year I feel sadder as still living with my parents. Just lost my job with pepsi and now stuck with a weight restriction until I can afford surgery. Aren't birthdays fun....
Oh well just have to keep on smiling and keeping my head up. Somehow my luck has to change....
HUGS yall hope you are all having wonderful ones. Wishing all of you the very best.
~Azraell
PS.... please no gifts. Happy Brithday wishes are more then enough for me. Never was one huge on getting gifts....love giving more then receiving. Thanks for understanding. <3
My Future Uncertain.....
Posted 6 years agoWell was looking towards possibly going back to college again for a shot to maybe have a better future or to have a future at all................
Sadly college will likely possibly not happen now.....
Was working for a pepsi delivery company and got hurt on the job. Well sadly about ten years ago got hurt at another work place which I have a fusion in my neck due to it. Sadly I went to the doctor for this new injury and the news was not great. But needed an EMG to get a better picture of whats going on....sadly it was denied by the workmans comp insurance company. On the grounds that they are making the determination as to whether or not this is a preexisting condition or not.
The issues I'm having is numbness and tingling in my dominant arm and hand. So there is no way for me to go back to work. As it is I have been off for 3 weeks now and it may be more. Been filling out paperwork and doing physical therapy since being off. Doctors will not release me back to work without restrictions and the restrictions are severe enough that there isn't a single job I can do at work. I did not have insurance through the company as not enough hours to qualify and was denied by the state as working too many hours. So thus why I'm in a tiny pickle....then you add on top of it that the possible ways for me to get better all involve surgery well thus my predicament and why college is now looking like that dream is dead for me.
So right now my future is very cloudy....and will not know how much Workmans comp will deny till tuesday.
Doing my best to keep my chin up and stay positive but its hard.
Thanks for reading and thanks for your time. Have a wonderful day and may your future be very bright.
*HUGS*
Sadly college will likely possibly not happen now.....
Was working for a pepsi delivery company and got hurt on the job. Well sadly about ten years ago got hurt at another work place which I have a fusion in my neck due to it. Sadly I went to the doctor for this new injury and the news was not great. But needed an EMG to get a better picture of whats going on....sadly it was denied by the workmans comp insurance company. On the grounds that they are making the determination as to whether or not this is a preexisting condition or not.
The issues I'm having is numbness and tingling in my dominant arm and hand. So there is no way for me to go back to work. As it is I have been off for 3 weeks now and it may be more. Been filling out paperwork and doing physical therapy since being off. Doctors will not release me back to work without restrictions and the restrictions are severe enough that there isn't a single job I can do at work. I did not have insurance through the company as not enough hours to qualify and was denied by the state as working too many hours. So thus why I'm in a tiny pickle....then you add on top of it that the possible ways for me to get better all involve surgery well thus my predicament and why college is now looking like that dream is dead for me.
So right now my future is very cloudy....and will not know how much Workmans comp will deny till tuesday.
Doing my best to keep my chin up and stay positive but its hard.
Thanks for reading and thanks for your time. Have a wonderful day and may your future be very bright.
*HUGS*
So in need of a sona update or change....
Posted 6 years agoDon't get me wrong as I absolutely love my sona and his design. Uniparasite did such an amazing job with the design and working from the very basic idea I had while he expanded upon it so nicely. I will likely never let go of that design (can't say absolutely never cause life changes and so do feelings/attachments).
I just for some reason feel like he needs to be edgier and a little more along the lines of my likes to reflect more of myself. Sadly have not had the money or means to do this. Plus would need to find the right artist to take this on. To really make this sona very much a reflection of myself.
Sorry just getting this out there. And no I'm not unhappy with my sona I just know he needs some changes to be more well me.
*HUGS EVERYONE*
I just for some reason feel like he needs to be edgier and a little more along the lines of my likes to reflect more of myself. Sadly have not had the money or means to do this. Plus would need to find the right artist to take this on. To really make this sona very much a reflection of myself.
Sorry just getting this out there. And no I'm not unhappy with my sona I just know he needs some changes to be more well me.
*HUGS EVERYONE*
Still debating on rehoming/trimming down on characters(sad)
Posted 6 years agoThis is very hard for me to do as I love all of these characters so very very much. So it is a very tough debate I'm having with myself. And this is just sort of a look into who I'm still debating on and who I know I'm keeping.
And I have not really come to a final decision yet on who will go and who won't right now this is just a list to update on progress on decision so not selling or rehoming anyone just yet (and not sure when or if that will happen as my schedule keeps interfering with my progress on making decisions properly).
You can ask but does not mean I will have a hard yes or no on letting them go. Plus have no clue on price or trade or any of that but I can try maybe. And just because they are on the "Pretty sure they are Staying" does not mean if there is a good home I know they would thrive in happens by I won't let them go as thats the point behind this finding good homes for great characters....with people who will expand on these characters more then I can right now.
Of course this is not all of the adopts I have. Some have not made it to FA as of yet as had not had the time to post them.
As for me letting these characters go....well its still a battle going on in my head as to who I will let go and who I will hang onto. there are a few characters on both lists I'm still not sure where they will end up list wise yet. But wanted to get this up sort of to pressure myself to do this and give these characters a better chance then they have with me atm.
Characters I'm debating on still as to whether or not to keep them or to help them find better homes:
Rex Guinea Pig ~ by tkc2021 http://www.furaffinity.net/view/31579506/
Hairless Guinea Pig ~ Adopt by tkc2021 http://www.furaffinity.net/view/31579486/
Ol'sun Revantusk ~ adopt by Monawolt http://www.furaffinity.net/view/28635443/
Alphonze "Hard Shell" Arguell ~ adopt by Silver-Stag http://www.furaffinity.net/view/28192625/
Ghost ~ By Keel the Equine http://www.furaffinity.net/view/27768577/
Boxcar the Bull Berserker~ by ??? http://www.furaffinity.net/view/27768515/
Sam Arthas ~ by Censored http://www.furaffinity.net/view/27768455/
Joseph Ironwoodz ~ by Censored http://www.furaffinity.net/view/27768391/
Crying Magical Deer http://www.furaffinity.net/gallery/.....-Magical-Deer/
"Holy" (Both arts) ~ by DanteTheBeast http://www.furaffinity.net/view/26831913/
"The Dark Bishop" ~ adopt by LoveOrBeKilled on DA http://www.furaffinity.net/view/26727842/
Greg "Morphz" Raul (male Version)~ by Jakkal http://www.furaffinity.net/view/26580762/
Greg "Morphz" Raul (female version)~ by DemonNyuu http://www.furaffinity.net/view/26580097/
Zenon "Dark One" Negrand ~ by Psyarch http://www.furaffinity.net/view/26563533/
Damon "Nega" Blackmane http://www.furaffinity.net/view/26246611/
Breaker "Blue Tank" Alphonse http://www.furaffinity.net/view/26246479/
Blue "Ice Crystals" Tobias ~ by Samnson http://www.furaffinity.net/view/26246232/
Anna "The Titan" April ~ by drakemohkami http://www.furaffinity.net/view/26237867/
Lionbear ~ adopt by MrPr1993 http://www.furaffinity.net/view/26237350/
Josta ~ by MrPr1993 on DA http://www.furaffinity.net/view/26237256/
Jian Shun ~ adopt by MrPR1993 on DA http://www.furaffinity.net/view/26237023/
Shenell "Golden Mane" Paul by DJpuppeh http://www.furaffinity.net/view/25842698/
Azraell's Goo Bodyguards http://www.furaffinity.net/gallery/.....oo-Bodyguards/
Kane ~ by FsMaverick http://www.furaffinity.net/view/20849517/
Young Strong and full of Spunk ~ Adopt by DemonNyuu http://www.furaffinity.net/view/20027516/
Are you his next NOM? ~ Adopt by BattleFerrets http://www.furaffinity.net/view/20026946/
The Dark Wolf ~ Adopt by Darkunisha http://www.furaffinity.net/view/20026094/
Brother and Sister - by ViolaNarRayya http://www.furaffinity.net/view/18860329/
Halkrath Kv'var-de ~ Predator/Yautja Hunter art by Mr_Canvas http://www.furaffinity.net/view/18821440/
Andraste Cullglade ~ Rhino Dragon Adopt by DemonNyuu http://www.furaffinity.net/view/18366786/
Hippolyta Blackthorne ~ BearDragon Adopt by DemonNyuu http://www.furaffinity.net/view/18366604/
Artemis Letto ~ adopt from DemonNyuu http://www.furaffinity.net/view/18366398/
Olinda Chi (Beta) - art by TitaniumHavok http://www.furaffinity.net/view/17987606/
Wolfric Tau (Alpha) -art by TitaniumHavok http://www.furaffinity.net/view/17987091/
Valeriya Loban ~ My Lykos fem warrior ~ adopt (DemonNyuu) http://www.furaffinity.net/view/17521122/
Dick the Rhino (Adopt by Hermes12) http://www.furaffinity.net/view/16729449/
Broodfather ~ adopt by ElysiumBliss http://www.furaffinity.net/view/15591614/
Peekaboo Patches ~ adopt from ElysiumBliss http://www.furaffinity.net/view/15466847/
Azraell's twin sister Aegea http://www.furaffinity.net/view/14310468/
Alcinoe~Beautiful Adopt from KandySweetpaw http://www.furaffinity.net/view/14040094/
Terry Pinellas-Surfer Dude/Bodybuilder (adopt) http://www.furaffinity.net/view/14033429/
Azraell ~ alien form http://www.furaffinity.net/view/13616654/
Vesper (maybe???) http://www.furaffinity.net/view/7605180/
Characters I'm pretty sure are staying:
Azraell (my sona)
Sean "Big Boss" Alton ~ by TKC2021 http://www.furaffinity.net/view/31042763/
Vaslof the Immortal ~ by Fragore http://www.furaffinity.net/view/30319091/
Rudriag Gonzo ~ by Fragore http://www.furaffinity.net/view/27690366/
Any orcs by Noctis http://www.furaffinity.net/gallery/.....he-Orc-Titans/
The Rubber Beasts orcs http://www.furaffinity.net/gallery/.....Rubber-Beasts/
Norton Manor http://www.furaffinity.net/gallery/...../Norton-Manor/
House of Incubi http://www.furaffinity.net/gallery/.....use-of-Incubi/
Ben "Blue Jay" Kash ~ by DemondragonCyan http://www.furaffinity.net/view/26639346/
Brett "Goldenmane" Arpho ~ by DemonDragonCyan http://www.furaffinity.net/view/26390789/
Orthug Brothers http://www.furaffinity.net/gallery/.....thug-Brothers/
Gurukk Wolfsblood ~ Adopt by Benzy http://www.furaffinity.net/view/26238073/
Tony "Black Diamond" Charge ~ By Diablo http://www.furaffinity.net/view/26229976/
Anthony "Big Papa" Brushtail ~ adopt by TKC2021 http://www.furaffinity.net/view/25919073/
Victor "Heart" Paul ~ by TKC2021 http://www.furaffinity.net/view/25739368/
Rufus ~ adopt by NethGooRat http://www.furaffinity.net/view/24290391/
Moo cow gal Star ~ art by mimic12455 http://www.furaffinity.net/view/25141020/
Pryde http://www.furaffinity.net/gallery/...../232735/Pryde/
Tank ~ Adopt by Bogrim (pose 1) http://www.furaffinity.net/view/20861731/
Jeremy ~ Adopt by Bogrim http://www.furaffinity.net/view/20861853/
Andrew Martin - Adopt by TKC2021 http://www.furaffinity.net/view/19890073/
Stephen "Big Beast" Evjen - Commission by TKC2021 http://www.furaffinity.net/view/19889927/
Anton "Shooting Star" Stephens ~ adopt by lGinsukel http://www.furaffinity.net/view/18921192/
Faith http://www.furaffinity.net/gallery/.....rgaless-Faith/
Azraell's pet/mount Gnaw ~ Adopt from UndeadKitty13 http://www.furaffinity.net/view/14246766/
Lykos - Mat P. (wolf form) http://www.furaffinity.net/view/14068230/
Characters spoken for and shared that are in flux atm (not sure if I will let them go or not but if I do they are spoken for):
Ignis the Red by Xinwan http://www.furaffinity.net/view/31165919/
Ugul The Prime "Red Spanker" ~ adopt by TollrinSenpai(spoken for by myself on behalf of Croup)
http://www.furaffinity.net/view/26775791/
Spoken for by diablo (still unsure if I'm giving Ranger up or not):
Were Garou ~ by Pieu_a_taupe http://www.furaffinity.net/view/27768659/
Dark Stallion Blood Mage ~ Adopt by RichardDeus http://www.furaffinity.net/view/20027197/
Ranger "Tooth" Alpha ~ by FurryPuddingTheGreat http://www.furaffinity.net/view/26246349/
Thanks for putting up with my rambling nature..... HUGS
And I have not really come to a final decision yet on who will go and who won't right now this is just a list to update on progress on decision so not selling or rehoming anyone just yet (and not sure when or if that will happen as my schedule keeps interfering with my progress on making decisions properly).
You can ask but does not mean I will have a hard yes or no on letting them go. Plus have no clue on price or trade or any of that but I can try maybe. And just because they are on the "Pretty sure they are Staying" does not mean if there is a good home I know they would thrive in happens by I won't let them go as thats the point behind this finding good homes for great characters....with people who will expand on these characters more then I can right now.
Of course this is not all of the adopts I have. Some have not made it to FA as of yet as had not had the time to post them.
As for me letting these characters go....well its still a battle going on in my head as to who I will let go and who I will hang onto. there are a few characters on both lists I'm still not sure where they will end up list wise yet. But wanted to get this up sort of to pressure myself to do this and give these characters a better chance then they have with me atm.
Characters I'm debating on still as to whether or not to keep them or to help them find better homes:
Rex Guinea Pig ~ by tkc2021 http://www.furaffinity.net/view/31579506/
Hairless Guinea Pig ~ Adopt by tkc2021 http://www.furaffinity.net/view/31579486/
Ol'sun Revantusk ~ adopt by Monawolt http://www.furaffinity.net/view/28635443/
Alphonze "Hard Shell" Arguell ~ adopt by Silver-Stag http://www.furaffinity.net/view/28192625/
Ghost ~ By Keel the Equine http://www.furaffinity.net/view/27768577/
Boxcar the Bull Berserker~ by ??? http://www.furaffinity.net/view/27768515/
Sam Arthas ~ by Censored http://www.furaffinity.net/view/27768455/
Joseph Ironwoodz ~ by Censored http://www.furaffinity.net/view/27768391/
Crying Magical Deer http://www.furaffinity.net/gallery/.....-Magical-Deer/
"Holy" (Both arts) ~ by DanteTheBeast http://www.furaffinity.net/view/26831913/
"The Dark Bishop" ~ adopt by LoveOrBeKilled on DA http://www.furaffinity.net/view/26727842/
Greg "Morphz" Raul (male Version)~ by Jakkal http://www.furaffinity.net/view/26580762/
Greg "Morphz" Raul (female version)~ by DemonNyuu http://www.furaffinity.net/view/26580097/
Zenon "Dark One" Negrand ~ by Psyarch http://www.furaffinity.net/view/26563533/
Damon "Nega" Blackmane http://www.furaffinity.net/view/26246611/
Breaker "Blue Tank" Alphonse http://www.furaffinity.net/view/26246479/
Blue "Ice Crystals" Tobias ~ by Samnson http://www.furaffinity.net/view/26246232/
Anna "The Titan" April ~ by drakemohkami http://www.furaffinity.net/view/26237867/
Lionbear ~ adopt by MrPr1993 http://www.furaffinity.net/view/26237350/
Josta ~ by MrPr1993 on DA http://www.furaffinity.net/view/26237256/
Jian Shun ~ adopt by MrPR1993 on DA http://www.furaffinity.net/view/26237023/
Shenell "Golden Mane" Paul by DJpuppeh http://www.furaffinity.net/view/25842698/
Azraell's Goo Bodyguards http://www.furaffinity.net/gallery/.....oo-Bodyguards/
Kane ~ by FsMaverick http://www.furaffinity.net/view/20849517/
Young Strong and full of Spunk ~ Adopt by DemonNyuu http://www.furaffinity.net/view/20027516/
Are you his next NOM? ~ Adopt by BattleFerrets http://www.furaffinity.net/view/20026946/
The Dark Wolf ~ Adopt by Darkunisha http://www.furaffinity.net/view/20026094/
Brother and Sister - by ViolaNarRayya http://www.furaffinity.net/view/18860329/
Halkrath Kv'var-de ~ Predator/Yautja Hunter art by Mr_Canvas http://www.furaffinity.net/view/18821440/
Andraste Cullglade ~ Rhino Dragon Adopt by DemonNyuu http://www.furaffinity.net/view/18366786/
Hippolyta Blackthorne ~ BearDragon Adopt by DemonNyuu http://www.furaffinity.net/view/18366604/
Artemis Letto ~ adopt from DemonNyuu http://www.furaffinity.net/view/18366398/
Olinda Chi (Beta) - art by TitaniumHavok http://www.furaffinity.net/view/17987606/
Wolfric Tau (Alpha) -art by TitaniumHavok http://www.furaffinity.net/view/17987091/
Valeriya Loban ~ My Lykos fem warrior ~ adopt (DemonNyuu) http://www.furaffinity.net/view/17521122/
Dick the Rhino (Adopt by Hermes12) http://www.furaffinity.net/view/16729449/
Broodfather ~ adopt by ElysiumBliss http://www.furaffinity.net/view/15591614/
Peekaboo Patches ~ adopt from ElysiumBliss http://www.furaffinity.net/view/15466847/
Azraell's twin sister Aegea http://www.furaffinity.net/view/14310468/
Alcinoe~Beautiful Adopt from KandySweetpaw http://www.furaffinity.net/view/14040094/
Terry Pinellas-Surfer Dude/Bodybuilder (adopt) http://www.furaffinity.net/view/14033429/
Azraell ~ alien form http://www.furaffinity.net/view/13616654/
Vesper (maybe???) http://www.furaffinity.net/view/7605180/
Characters I'm pretty sure are staying:
Azraell (my sona)
Sean "Big Boss" Alton ~ by TKC2021 http://www.furaffinity.net/view/31042763/
Vaslof the Immortal ~ by Fragore http://www.furaffinity.net/view/30319091/
Rudriag Gonzo ~ by Fragore http://www.furaffinity.net/view/27690366/
Any orcs by Noctis http://www.furaffinity.net/gallery/.....he-Orc-Titans/
The Rubber Beasts orcs http://www.furaffinity.net/gallery/.....Rubber-Beasts/
Norton Manor http://www.furaffinity.net/gallery/...../Norton-Manor/
House of Incubi http://www.furaffinity.net/gallery/.....use-of-Incubi/
Ben "Blue Jay" Kash ~ by DemondragonCyan http://www.furaffinity.net/view/26639346/
Brett "Goldenmane" Arpho ~ by DemonDragonCyan http://www.furaffinity.net/view/26390789/
Orthug Brothers http://www.furaffinity.net/gallery/.....thug-Brothers/
Gurukk Wolfsblood ~ Adopt by Benzy http://www.furaffinity.net/view/26238073/
Tony "Black Diamond" Charge ~ By Diablo http://www.furaffinity.net/view/26229976/
Anthony "Big Papa" Brushtail ~ adopt by TKC2021 http://www.furaffinity.net/view/25919073/
Victor "Heart" Paul ~ by TKC2021 http://www.furaffinity.net/view/25739368/
Rufus ~ adopt by NethGooRat http://www.furaffinity.net/view/24290391/
Moo cow gal Star ~ art by mimic12455 http://www.furaffinity.net/view/25141020/
Pryde http://www.furaffinity.net/gallery/...../232735/Pryde/
Tank ~ Adopt by Bogrim (pose 1) http://www.furaffinity.net/view/20861731/
Jeremy ~ Adopt by Bogrim http://www.furaffinity.net/view/20861853/
Andrew Martin - Adopt by TKC2021 http://www.furaffinity.net/view/19890073/
Stephen "Big Beast" Evjen - Commission by TKC2021 http://www.furaffinity.net/view/19889927/
Anton "Shooting Star" Stephens ~ adopt by lGinsukel http://www.furaffinity.net/view/18921192/
Faith http://www.furaffinity.net/gallery/.....rgaless-Faith/
Azraell's pet/mount Gnaw ~ Adopt from UndeadKitty13 http://www.furaffinity.net/view/14246766/
Lykos - Mat P. (wolf form) http://www.furaffinity.net/view/14068230/
Characters spoken for and shared that are in flux atm (not sure if I will let them go or not but if I do they are spoken for):
Ignis the Red by Xinwan http://www.furaffinity.net/view/31165919/
Ugul The Prime "Red Spanker" ~ adopt by TollrinSenpai(spoken for by myself on behalf of Croup)
http://www.furaffinity.net/view/26775791/
Spoken for by diablo (still unsure if I'm giving Ranger up or not):
Were Garou ~ by Pieu_a_taupe http://www.furaffinity.net/view/27768659/
Dark Stallion Blood Mage ~ Adopt by RichardDeus http://www.furaffinity.net/view/20027197/
Ranger "Tooth" Alpha ~ by FurryPuddingTheGreat http://www.furaffinity.net/view/26246349/
Thanks for putting up with my rambling nature..... HUGS
Might be trimming down on characters...(some have already..)
Posted 6 years agoHello,
Might be trimming down on the number of characters I have (gallery partial purge). Some have already left the gallery as some probably have noticed by now. Sadly I just do not have the time or money to devote the attention I should to all of them. Thusly some have already been rehomed with either friends or people I trust very much with these characters knowing they will treat them right. That being said I need to start the process soon to see who will stay and who will go. Also will likely make the determination on who will sell for how much. As I will likely be selling them for under what I paid for them as I have a very poor memory of how much I paid for any adopt and bothering the artist to remember is not something I want to do. But already there are some characters I will hold onto regardless as I made some promises about their care.....and a couple I care a lot about as so attached to them so will likely not let them go. Not sure how long or when I will make these decisions about who stays and who goes but it will likely happen at some point.
Also there are some adopts who have yet to make it here. So will also have to make a determination on them yet also.
Thanks for your time and have a wonderful day.
*HUGS*
Azraell
Might be trimming down on the number of characters I have (gallery partial purge). Some have already left the gallery as some probably have noticed by now. Sadly I just do not have the time or money to devote the attention I should to all of them. Thusly some have already been rehomed with either friends or people I trust very much with these characters knowing they will treat them right. That being said I need to start the process soon to see who will stay and who will go. Also will likely make the determination on who will sell for how much. As I will likely be selling them for under what I paid for them as I have a very poor memory of how much I paid for any adopt and bothering the artist to remember is not something I want to do. But already there are some characters I will hold onto regardless as I made some promises about their care.....and a couple I care a lot about as so attached to them so will likely not let them go. Not sure how long or when I will make these decisions about who stays and who goes but it will likely happen at some point.
Also there are some adopts who have yet to make it here. So will also have to make a determination on them yet also.
Thanks for your time and have a wonderful day.
*HUGS*
Azraell
Birthday prep......(plus ironic movie reference out of it)
Posted 7 years agoAs some of you may know my birthday is Saturday....and there is a movie reference in it. Will give you who stared in the movie I can imagine you will be able to guess title of movie based off of just that. Steve Carell starred in this movie. You can fill in the dots from there lol.
Well love yall and catch yall later. ^_^
Well love yall and catch yall later. ^_^
Arggghhhhhhh Migraines....SIGH
Posted 7 years agoLongest migraine I have ever had going on 3 days now...absolute hell. You think after 20+ years of having them I would get used to them. Sadly that has never happened. Well vision is going. Later yall and all the best to yall.
Fragore check him out and the free art raffle
Posted 7 years ago
A very talented artist with a wonderful gallery and some very studly adopts. I should know I have one and love the adopt very much. Very nice person overall to talk too and truly a joy to see his new pieces when he posts them. One day I hope to have enough moeny to commission him (when I have a job of course). So please check him out and if you feel so inclined maybe drop a watch on him.
Raffle: http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/8825826/
Have a wonderful day yall!!!
Help a gentleman out (selling his characters for college $)
Posted 7 years agoHello,
There is a very nice gentleman who is parting with some of his much loved characters. He needs college funds and is looking to sell some of his characters apart from fursonas. He would love to spread the word and hopes to get the money soon. So please help if you can. Thank you.
Signed,
Azraell
Link to JOURNAL CHARACTER SALE: http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/8816208/
There is a very nice gentleman who is parting with some of his much loved characters. He needs college funds and is looking to sell some of his characters apart from fursonas. He would love to spread the word and hopes to get the money soon. So please help if you can. Thank you.
Signed,
Azraell
Link to JOURNAL CHARACTER SALE: http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/8816208/