Just to let everyone know, I was entertaining  naketa and  calafin for about a week. Ohhh and what a week it was. We went to the Henry Ford museum in Deerborn Michigan as well as the Greenfield village. Turns out Nak has a thing for steam engines, which makes it easy to get hir a special gift for hir birthday. It was also fun messing with Calafin, tugging on his dorsal fin and sonaring him in places. I really enjoyed their company and being around them, it was like I was coming home. We are already planning a return trip but that won't happen for a long long time. For now its full steam ahead to prepare for the rest of the year.

I am issuing a bounty quest. Anyone who can find me a site or aquire the sound track for Dinotopia The Sunstone Odyssey will get a free story written by me. Length is unlimited and terms unrestricted.

Example: http://www.furaffinity.net/view/17296686/

It's been five months since the events of December happened and I'm still rebuilding what has been lost. The destruction of what was my world was total and only now am I starting to close some of the gaps and fill in the cracks from what should have been a fatal response. To loose that much and know that it's not coming back, for me, is an instant death sentence. But I had too much to live for, too many people who would be devastated in what could only be described as a selfish act of cowardliness and poor judgement. I stayed strong and held on as the world I knew blew up like a Michael Bay film. Fire and destruction seemed to last for days and days until everything was a pile of ash and rubble. Fifteen years worth of collecting up in smoke in a matter of seconds.

But this is not who I am. I am not one to lay on the ground and accept defeat. I rose up from the destruction and took what was left to begin rebuilding. Yes, there were casualties and many things I once had will never be recovered, but what did survive will be part of my new beginning. Starting with a new direction in life that is more profitable and hopefully more plentiful with opportunities. More chances of me making my goals in a timely fashion instead of this hope and pray tactic that I have been using. Luck has no place in where I'm going, but it can tag along if it can be useful.

If I can take care of it myself, then I will do it myself. Up until now the major machines of my life have been run by my parents. I will be taking ownership of these machines and operating them myself. This will mean less time for others in my life, at least until I can get everything automated and iron out the bugs. Sometimes the biggest obstacle in the way of our goals and dreams is ourselves. For too long I have been relying on others to get things done, now that way of life has begun to fall apart and it is time to reverse the damage.

So this is a new start, a new chapter in this we call life.

So in two weeks I'll be 29. Holy carp I'm getting old, however, in that time I have grown so much and I'm still growing and learning as I go. I still have so much to repair, mainly my porn collection. I've put out a call for help for those who wish to offer me a copy of their porn collection to send me a copy to help rebuild. That offer is still out there, but I'm also looking to get more art of Meiko and Meika. Those two are so under appreciated.

I'm trying to rebuild my sound effects collection but I need help. I cannot remember where I got my audio recordings from. So I need your help. If anyone has audio recordings of orcas calling in a pod I would greatly appreciate them. I'm getting back into the swing of making audio tracks again but I'm starting over. So I would appreciate your help. I also need a good Peer to peer program that works!

Ever since I left Meijer I have been looking for a new job. I have been looking and looking but unable to find a replacement. So tonight when I was down stairs my dad said I had 30 days to find a job. If someone told you that you had 30 days that means that at the end of 30 days something bad is going to happen. So I took it as he was going to kick me out so I called him out. I got my suit case and packed it up, to hope for the best and prepare for the worst. What is sad is my dad said that it was meant as a challenge. NO NO YOU DON'T FUCKIN DO THAT! You don't challenge someone by saying they have 30 days and then leaving it at that. You said I challenge you and then lay it out. So I am just bracing for when my dad pulls the trigger and sinks me.

So I got home from a nice gathering....a very nice and fun event. I get up to my room and there on my bed is a print out of my submission of Gideon's art CD "The Gideon Bible". This upsets me more than anything...this is an outright violation of privacy. In a fit of rage I shredded the paper and made sure the CD was secured, which it was along with the others. I am so....so mad. I don't know what made my mom look this up but its very very upsetting to me. Fortunately, the stuff my parents would really have a fit about is locked away from them due to FA's coding. Unless they had an account and were watching me they wouldn't see them. But still, the fact that they are back to spying on me is very underhanded and also outright unacceptable. This cloak and dagger crap has gone on too long and I'm putting my foot down. I will not live my life where my own family is spying on my very move and I refuse to keep quiet about it too.

It feels really weird getting back online after being gone for almost three months. I have so much work to do to get back into things. But what is more unnerving is the fact that in my absence things seem to have changed so much. When my world was destroyed in December, I was in a comfortable place, things were going well and getting better. But then the bottom fell out and I crashed into a million pieces; some of which were lost. But I gathered what was left and pieced me back together as best I could. I still have a long way to go before everything is as it was before the disaster, but I will recover.

Follow me if you will through the seas of life. you are aboard my battleship, fresh from the repair docks. we have but one goal, to continue our life as we please and defend our allies from attack. a few days ago i contacted coonloon to ask how things are going with him. i found out that at the time he was visiting another friend of mine, silverpaw. i got caught up with what has been going on and had a nice chat. when i got home later that night i crossed with my now sworn enemy, my parents. like two great battleships, we crossed paths, our guns pointed fore and aft in peace. when i mentioned who i had recently spoken to, they swung their guns broadside and opened fire. “why would you contact him?” they asked, “he is a low-life, a hoodrat! he will never bring you up, only drag you down. they all will.” so the shells flew, peppering my deck with holes. i went to battlestations and returned fire. soon the air is full of smoke and lead as i find out the only reason why they are attacking is because coonloon comes from a lower class family and doesn't have the same up-bringing i do. that does not justify putting a total ban on him or anyone else who meets the same conditions.

as we fight my dad pulls out his torpedos and launches. i take a hit as he tells me im heading down the old road and that i need to stop or i will be homeless. they concentrate their fire on my associations, painting them as criminals and undesirables. they then blame them for the current troubles we are facing and say that if i didn't reach out to these undesirable people we wouldn't be here. at that point i had enought! i throw the wheel over and close in to point-blank range and open up with a broadside of my 16-inch, 5-inch, 40-mm and 20-mm guns. my simple reply to this unwarranted attact of theirs was, “if you want to yell at hoodrats and low-lifes, start with the ones in the mirror.” i let the lead fly as i pulled away to disengage and return to port.

#micdrop #shotsfired

so i got a new computer yesterday but havent set it up yet. im scared of it. but its a interesting kind of scare. im scared of it because of the unknown. im worried about restoring services such as my anti-virus program and most of all, worried that ill never be able to access skype. ive been without a laptop for over two months so suddenly having a new one is a bit frightening for me. im taking my time to ease back into the flow and allowing myself to adjust. i would appreciate hugs and cuddles as i start up again.

but im also excited for it. the laptop is massive, and by massive i mean beefy. it has more RAM than what i know what to do with and a hard drive more spacious than my ass. it also has biometric security which is awesome, and terrifying.

To avoid another contact blackout in the future, I am making an address book of all my friends. I am asking for your cooperation in this effort. For those of you I have numbers for, I will be contacting you via text to ask for your real full name, fur name and address for the address book. The information will be used in the event my phone and computer are taken away again. I will, in no way, share this with anyone. If you want to be in the address book and I have not contacted you, please text me the information or note me.

Thank you

I was ambused. a surprise attack from the fog. my folks in a last attempt to break me from the fandom, unleashed a broadside on me and ranked me with 15 inch shells. they said that god would not approve of my choices. they also said that if my late grandma knew what i was doing she would be heartbroken. so they shot right at my waterline and ruptured my hull. i fired back and made a run for it, leaving a oil slick behind.

so im heading for the repair dock, also known as the arms if friends. there i will be taken out of water and into dry dock for repairs.

In a display of intolerance that i have never seen before, my parents have ordered me to stop seeing my therapist due to the fact that she will not tell me that being in the furry community is wrong nor will she say that homo sexuality is wrong. further more, they are furious that my therapist doesn't agree that i have a sexual addiction but instead have a fetish. so tonight they and another member of our church sat down with me and spoke out of the bible about how homo sexuality is against god and that the furries are the wrong crowd for me to be part of.

for over two hours they debated with me, quoting scripture from different books. so they shelled me and tried to show me their agenda. while they had some good points, they failed to prove how dressing up as an animal is sinful. ok so you shelled the living shit out of me, peppered my deck with holes and torpedoed me. now explain why you did that before i wreck house. im still waiting for a response from them.

It will be almost a full week since i got my new phone. a lot has changed since i was gone. one of my friends is getting married. but a simple question to bring me up-to-date on their relationship status (open or closed) caused me to take some shelling off my bow and a few hits below the waterline. sure i may be a sexually active orca who doesn't judge others on their looks. but that doesn't mean im always looking for a new hole to fill.

but what i am happy about is that during my absence i was able to break down some personal walls and become stronger. i still have more growing to do but im getting there.

Ive been moving around a lot today getting the last ends tied up before next month. i ordered a new laptop, sent out an important letter and paid my shipping fee for otterly amazing. i also placed an order to get syrios his first tail. so today is busy. but before its all through, i have to finish the last batch of poems for naketa and calafin. after that ill be making some necklaces for some of my friends to mark milestones. so it will be a busy day until bedtime.

Well since i got my new phone ive returned to my old self. which means im back to bratty mischief to my fur family and loved ones. already im causing michief for naketa and calafin. im not causing serious trouble, just the kind that will get me a spanking.

So its been a day since i got my new phone and it feels so good to be able to talk to others again. im back in contact with those who care about.

My new phone has arrived. starting tomorrow when i have service on it, ill post my new number in a journal for those who still have my old one. the journal will only be up for 24 hours before i take it down. when you message me, please identify yourself so i can add you to my new phone book.

You probably already know that my parents hate the fandom. you already know that ive been crying a lot because i miss everyone. but what im about to tell you is going to make you cry.

my mom has to go for surgery soon. the doctors say that with her immune system, she might not pull through. but we are going up north for the last bit of winter. today i had a fight with my mom about me going up north. i wanted to stay behind, to see friends and be held like a calf should. but i am being forced, knowingly kidnaped to go 250 miles away. but that is not what will get you.

i was watching youtube on my ds when i saw a video intended for those who are fighting with their parents. in the video, a girl was telling how she told her dad after one bad fight that she wished he wad dead that she hated him. in the end she regreted it. this hit home with me because i dont tell my parents i love them hardly at all.

i broke down crying and actually made the sound that a mother orca makes when her calf is taken away. i howeled out and held my naketa plush so the crying would stop.

i love my parents, just wish they were less abusive.

In yet another fine display of christian compassion my folks have removed all freedom of choice. im no longer allowed to stay home alone, have any independence, or use any method of venting. i must obey their every will and wish, even if it means selling off my freedom.

i feel trapped, like im a criminal shoved into a cell. i can't talk to people or do any of my venting because im mocked for it. and when i try to counter i get shot in the face.

so tomorrow i will be forced to go up north against my will. i will be unable to post journals for 5 days.

Those who know me, know that im a prankster. so when the events of december 8th happened and destroyed that bratty side of me, people were sad to see it go. they missed me getting into trouble and the withdraw from who i once was made everyone worried.

well now that side is coming back. so watch out, everyones favorite playful orca is coming back.

You'd think with all the advances in medicen that we would have some treatments without side effects.

i started taking a new medicen for a condition and ive been having episodes where my digestive track feels like it was being pumped with air. ohhhnh gods it hurts, i wish i came with a pressure valve. but even though im visibly in pain, im still being forced to go to bible study. seriously, are you kidding me? i can hardly move and all you can think about is bible study... who died and made you a doctor. im already on the fence about leaving the church, and this kind of thing is a perfect example.

to make this even more insulting is that they think im faking it. so i told them, “ok, let me go get a sledge hammer and beat your stomach and then tell you to go to church like that.”

So i got a note from someone last night. turns out she used to go to my church. im not surprised she became a fur but its nice to know she is doing alright.

now for the nsfw part. my depression is starting to lift and my sex drive is returning in a hurry. im ordering a new laptop soon and i was wondering if any michigan furs would be willing to allow me to have a copy of their porn collection to help rebuild mine. im open to all sorts of furry yiff.

this orca needs to blow a huge load and soon.

So this is war. a battle of ideals and a way of life. ive been fearing this but im not alone. im guarded by a fleet of friends and loved ones. to put it simply, im a carrier in a battle group. im defended by experienced warriors. more so, im protected by the heavy guns of naketa, calafin, syrios and many others. in addition, i have a battery of local friends who are my safe harbors.

so as my folks shell me with their words of fear, i can take comfort knowing that i have a force behind me. but if i have to fight on my own, i'm fit to do so.

So i saw my doctor today and i showed her the porn i jerk off to. what was cool, no judgement. in fact, she said it was healthy for me to do so. when i asked her if she thought i had a sex addiction, she said that i didn't even meet the qualifications for addiction. she explained them to me and it is true. for one, having a sex drive is not wrong so long as it doesn't stop me from functioning. she also said that if im not harming anyone while looking at the porn then there should be no issue.

when i got home my parents asked me what was said. i summed it up as i don't have an addiction. i should have kept my mouth shut, because they started accusing me of manipulating my doctor. also, they are calling for me to see a christian doctor. while im not opposed to having a christian doctor, im opposed to the sudden call for one. yet another example of moving the goal post. its now a joke in how my parents are treating me. im able to separate my sexual needs from real life. but they still see a need to cruch anything they see.

i wonder what it would be like if my folks saw the same doctor.

oh and lastly, im going to be examined for mental and emotional abuse.