I would first like to say thank you so much for all your support. This has been said so many times in the last month, however I can never express how much I appreciate your enthusiasm and help.

The project was a complete success on Offbeatr, however there are still many who note and email me asking if there are other ways to support this project due to missing the pledge period or only having paypal at their disposal.

So in response to this, I'm opening up pre-orders for the project right here. For those of you who have not been able to support on offbeatr, simply click on the form and fill it out.

https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1Ou.....zYPPY/viewform

Feel free to ignore this link if you already supported Ex Gender: A Wolf in Stilletos on Offbeatr.

Thanks again!

-drayjay

(taken from my offbeatr update)

It's over guys!

I would not have imagined a turnout this successful. But for every dollar above expectation is all the more motivation to really make a satisfying experience for you guys. Much hard work awaits, 5 or 6 days a week. 8 hours per day. Everything is on a schedule, and on a budget. First order of business is to flesh out the writing, branching story points, and interactive events with placeholders so I can figure out just how much more artwork is needed to be finished. I may be working with an editor or two, and a few volunteer proofreaders when the time comes. January is really the month where I get everything organized and in working order. The remaining months are all about finishing all the art assets, (which are about 50 - 60% done at this point) and finally adding music/sound/voice work etc. The final month is all about getting the entire project wrapped up in a complete package that you've all been waiting for.

I will try to keep everyone up to date on the project's progress.

Thank you all very much. I look forward to your reaction when it's all done!

For those who still want to pledge and get rewards, I am working on organizing a possible "pledge extension" of sorts, to last throughout the month, and works via paypal. Keep an eye out for a journal update either tonight or tomorrow.

http://offbeatr.com/project/ex-gend.....os-27522940027

The countdown has begun. We're on the last day of the 30 day pledge period for Ex Gender: A Wolf in Stillettos.

On Monday, 5:28 PM UTC -5 The pledge period will be over, and the project will be funded.

Wow .... I really don't know how to address this level of support. It means a helluva lot to me on so many different levels. To be able to invest on important things that would vastly assist and make production possible is not only a relief, but a driving motivation. I have a strict work schedule to keep me on task, and with any luck, I may actually finish ahead of time.

Keep an eye out for updates! In addition, I should be able to post a few more commissions before January.

Thank you all very much.

So what the heck? I've done everything from a skype reset, to a complete re install... even using past versions of skype in hopes of getting the damn thing to work again. Is anyone else experiencing this? As soon as I boot skype up, my CPU % goes to 80, and once it's off, it goes back down to 3%. It lags horribly and has been rendered virtually unusable due to it being so sluggish and unresponsive. If there's a solution, I'd love to know. I've already tried:

-Reinstalling + restarting the PC
-Skype Reset
-uninstalling and downloading an older version.
-Calling it names like Cunt and Shit smear
-

In other news wow

9000! this is huge. The endings and scenarios are all worked out. I might as well prepare for 3 separate endings since 10,000 seems like such a possibility. Depending on what kind of thought bubbles you click on during the story will affect Phyco's attitude and overall experiences while he struggles to get used to his new body. How will this experience change his personality? ...(if at all) You'll also get to mess with him by choosing what outfits he'll be wearing throughout the story (or perhaps keep him nude!)

Unfortunately it looks like I'll have to remove the Tshirts from the stretch goals.... it just looks like it wont be a realistic possibility to budget in.. I really hope you guys can forgive that. It was a poor decision for me to throw that in, considering I had only expected a handful to pledge beyond $100

-Stickers are still in the plan
-prints of varying sizes are still in the plan
-Physical copies of the game will certainly be printed and distributed.
-Coffee mugs are still in the plan too, but I'm having trouble finding a company that will do it properly. (I wish I could manufacture them myself) I may need help for this.
-Keychains are still in the plan

I reeeally dont know how to start this journal. Other than stating the obvious.

HO

LEE

CRAP

O_O did you guys actually fund my freaken' project in a mere 10 hours of launching?

Let me take a long sip of coffee.... JUST SO I CAN SPIT IT OUT! :O

This is incredible. It means I am probably going to be working on and distributing those physical rewards in addition to those extra scenarios, endings, and pinups. Keep an eye out for updates and posts regarding the project.

Updates can be viewed on the site soon: http://offbeatr.com/project/ex-gend.....os-27522940027


Man, I cannot express how much I appreciate all of your support. This is blowing my mind. Seriously.

It's finally up and running guys! If you're interested in the project, please pledge your support!

http://offbeatr.com/project/ex-gend.....os-27522940027
http://offbeatr.com/project/ex-gend.....os-27522940027
http://offbeatr.com/project/ex-gend.....os-27522940027

Remember that pledging 20 USD + will automatically count as a preorder for the game. There's also a lot of digital goodies that cannot be obtained anywhere else if you pledge more than that.

In addition, physical rewards and more game content will be added if I can reach some of the stretch goals. Thank you so much for the support!

It's finally up and running guys! If you're interested in the project, please pledge your support!

http://offbeatr.com/project/ex-gend.....os-27522940027
http://offbeatr.com/project/ex-gend.....os-27522940027
http://offbeatr.com/project/ex-gend.....os-27522940027

Remember that pledging 20 USD + will automatically count as a preorder for the game. There's also a lot of digital goodies that cannot be obtained anywhere else if you pledge more than that.

In addition, physical rewards and more game content will be added if I can reach some of the stretch goals. Thank you so much for the support!

I am nearing the Offbeatr launch of my first major project. As some of you know, I've been working on a Phyco CD, which is sort of a spiritual successor to previous releases such as Traptastic and 63 Machine.

However, the project grew and grew, and became something much bigger. Instead of mere collection of pinups like my last two projects, it has now become a fully fledged narrative with character dialog, music, and branching paths. Utilizing python and Ren'py, I've been able to design a visual novel style presentation. This project has now become somewhat of a game, and I really hope a lot of you would be interested in helping me finish this project. Through Offbeatr, it will cost exactly as much as my previous two projects at 20 USD for the digital copy of the game.

I am currently around 65% finished with the entire thing.

This new project stars Phyco. The wolf with a sexchange. Check out the promo art :D

http://www.furaffinity.net/view/12137712/

VOTING IS OPEN NOW! click here! http://offbeatr.com/project/ex-gend.....os-27522940027

thanks guys! I look forward to working on this!

Like the "knee jerk" journals, the on the fence journals are about things that have been on my mind. However, this would be more about an issue or a subject that I honestly don't have a particular clear response to. Cognitive dissonance so to speak. Two sides of a coin that have equal volume...and perhaps problems or issues that don't have a solution at all.

This week's fence subject is about gender identity and pronouns.

On the side of idealism. Everyone is entitled to be any kind of person they wish, as long as it is civilized and or hurts no one. A biological female can consider himself a male. and vise-versa. Regardless of appearance. This should go without question. Though this is understandably rough around the edges, and difficult for others to share this consideration... particularly if the perceived appearance does not match the personality. However, as a growing civilized world, we should take more time to understand that there's a difference between gender and sex. It is simply hurtful to be constantly considered as something you are not due to first glance impressions. Though I am not a transgender person, I can probably imagine the levels of frustration based on my much milder experiences of being misinterpreted by my appearance. (mostly race assumptions made on me)

On the side of practicality. Expecting the world to pause, and ask beforehand what pronoun everyone is to be considered...is asking for a lot. It is also kind of ridiculous when you think about it. We utilize a binary set of gender pronouns because 99% of people simply fall into one category or another with no qualms. It simply works, and was built around the fact that, weather we like it or not, most people are either male or female. Can it be better? maybe. But I don't think the whole world is going (or should be going out of its way) to begin utilizing a different system of referential language amongst itself in order to accommodate such a low percentage of people who it would benefit. Then you have transgender people who would be offended by the seemingly considerate practice of "hey. which pronoun do you want?" In the end, everyone is still not happy. This is one of those things where the answer simply is... tough titties. Sucks to be different. I really don't see a worldwide change anytime soon. And I honestly cant blame the world for it.


idealism We should simply be more considerate...period.

practicality We should simply be less goddamn sensitive.


I can only clearly state that no one's life is just "better" because they're not experiencing "your" hardships. There is no real estate or limitation on joy or satisfaction. On non financial terms, someone else's ease of life does not contribute to your misery. And even on financial terms, this really doesn't hold up on an individual basis. Is it not also judgmental to consider people not experiencing your traumas and hardships to check their privilege or to accommodate your special needs? To ask for consideration is not wrong... But like many things, it's easy to go overboard...

I want to live in a more considerate world...but at the same time, I REALLY don't want to live in a social structure built out of eggshells. There is a problem in this statement, and I don't have a satisfying answer.

Audiobooks. What the hell. Why not? Found a book I've been meaning to read since highschool but never got around to it. It was posted on youtube which is very convenient. So I tried to listen while drawing and it turns out I've been missing out on something I've probably needed for years. The added mental stimulation does wonders for my concentration and my determination, things an artist can always appreciate more of. There are probably a few reasons why this sort of thing helps me so much. It prevents my mind from wandering as I work. It pretty much keeps me from wanting to do anything else while I draw. I am more preoccupied, and therefore content with my activity.

The only problem is... Audiobooks are so expensive.

Terribly expensive.

As of now , I am limited to whatever happens to be posted on youtube. I am hoping someone can have a suggestion, and perhaps a solution to this.

I know that some sites offer a sort of yearly or monthly subscription, however, my problem is their 1 book per month policy. Please. no. Fuck that. At this rate, (listening while drawing) i'd be blasting through at least 5 books a month.

I may hold an audiobook sketch commission each time I am in need of a new one. a decent sketch made for the sole purpose of paying for a much needed artistic pace maker of sorts.

I really appreciate the support from all around. I will continue to finish older commissions mixed with newer ones each week.

This week's kneeJERK topic is brought to you by:

"I cant help what I am" arguments.

Let me elaborate. We live in a world where homosexuality is still a controversial issue. Many here can write books on how they've been unfairly treated in our current society. Some of us live in safer zones than others, while others like myself have yet to..and perhaps never will inform their family of their preferred lifestyle. Throughout my entire childhood, and well into the present, my uncles, aunts, cousins, grandparents and parents alike have always shown a massive hatred and prejudice against the homosexual world. This sort of behavior is common in a Hispanic family. My family will never know that I am happy in my stable, long term relationship with  vir-no-vigoratus. Or perhaps they will find out... which will result in a noisy, ugly, uneducated, family wide hullabaloo. Many phone calls will follow, and an angry or concerned number of relatives will "fight for my spiritual well being" because we all know how many times Jesus said "Thou shal not be faggots lest my father be furious" Derpturotomy 3:12.

But what does this have to do with my topic? Well. I'm almost there.

Most progressive individuals, (gay or not gay) will unanimously stand by the understanding that this state of being, sexual preference, orientation, identification. is NOT A CHOICE. Knowing my experience, this is true enough for me.

When it comes to arguing against the prejudiced or the religiously intolerant about rights and respect... I often hear the "not a choice" argument... But there's something that's beginning to bother me about it.

Should this really be the main anchor that we use to ground ourselves? Hearing this argument so often, and so fervently is beginning to feel like it has an almost helpless air about it. "I cant help the way I am!" ...does that not sound ... almost apologetic? Doesn't it almost sound like a plea to you? It feels like this argument is admitting that there's something... abnormal about being gay. That there's something inherently wrong with it... and we "cant help it." Like it's some kind of genetic disease, or chronic condition that we are apologizing for. I can't imagine how much more pathetic this argument can sound to the ears of an already prejudiced party.

In a way, don't we all chose what we have? preference aside... isn't your life still a series of choices? One can chose to live a lie. I am certain many gay people (due to social pressure) are living a lie... pretending to be heterosexual, having children.... feeling incomplete. There's bravery in the choice to live true to your preference. But that bravery is extinguished when a "war cry" of homosexuality is "I cant help what I am."

I am not going to hide behind victimhood, or genetics, or lack of control... That notion really gets on my nerves now.

This is not a case of taking responsibility for something that's out of your control. The entire argument is now flawed and on the wrong track because it is suggesting that there's something "wrong" with one's state of being. I want to take this one step further, and leave the lack of choice out of the argument entirely. Should not the argument be along the lines of.. "Why do you care?" "Who are you to tell me how I should live my life?"

What are your thoughts and feelings on the subject?

KneeJERK topic of the week is brought to you by:

PC elitists.

They annoy the hell outta me.

To be clear: I like PC. I think it's awesome. Fuck yeah Steam, Fuck yeah settings and modding, fuck yeah mouse controls, fuck yeah inexpensive upgrading prices, fuck yeah point and click adventures, etc. etc. etc.

But then there's console experiences. They are made to be enjoyed a certain way. I fucking love those console games.

To completely stand by PC as "superior" due to it's "tech" ...is to side with tech and capability as a definition of "better". However... to do so is to forget or neglect the importance of the actual experience that the software provides. the artistic value. The game's worth.

It's true that the PC can be played on the big screen, with controllers... (which is pretty awesome I might add) .... but Can a PC play all games that ever existed...legitimately? if so, perhaps I can nod and agree that PC is mostly superior. But that only addresses one thing.

There's something PC enthusiasts seem to forget, or fail to fathom altogether ... Not everyone likes to tinker. A PC is a tinker machine. You get a game, and you dive into your graphics card, you toggle a few options, you set your controls, you update certain things, etc.... But a lot of people are never in the mood for any of that. Some of us enjoy being able to pop in a disk, flick a switch, and immediately dive into the game itself. Either approach deserves respect and space.

PC enthusiasts have every right to enjoy their PC experience. It fits their play style, it gives them more, etc. But PC enthusiasts become so unattractive and obnoxious the moment they push their preference.... it's just like any hipster wanting the world to know all about their "good taste". Just like any religion that assumes the world is lacking without their god or special set of values.

It really rubs me the wrong way... hearing that PC master race spiel.... over ....and over... and over again.

It bugs because after a certain point, it starts to feel like they're trying to convince themselves... or perhaps it becomes more like a noise... a mating call... a caw, or a neigh, or a squeak.

PC is pretty awesome. But quite often I just want to hold a controller and play The Last of Us, or Metroid Prime, or Dark souls. Maybe I want to enjoy something exactly the way a developer intended. Giving me all the options in the world does not automatically make an experience better.

Can PC do all of those with a controller? Perhaps. Probably yes. I tried dark souls on my PC. it was a mess to fix, and ultimately failed to work for me... it was a steam sale purchase thankfully... but this is the type of thing that plenty of console enthusiasts want to avoid altogether. It's perfectly understandable. I don't have the time or energy or nerd cred to get my PC to dance like that. It aint for everyone.

These days, I use my computer to draw... not much else.

I do not want to start flame wars, but I am interested in learning more about how others feel.

Inflammatory comments are fine as long as their negativity is directed at me. No fighting bickering or squabbling among each other, okay? We're adults.

will be streaming later than usual today. I wont have access to a computer until later tonight. thanks for your patience guys!

KneeJERK topic of the week is brought to you by:

People who say "gods" in expressions. particularly as a replacement of the more familiar "god". This is commonly heard in furry social circles

Example: "Gods I hate you." Instead of "God I hate you."

Reaction: I cringe.

This may sound like a conservative complaint, but I assure you it is not in defense of monotheism.

To clarify, for the past 8 - 9 years, I've leaned toward atheism. More specifically, I've leaned toward a fully scientific mindset. Spirits, supernatural abilities/events, and alternative medicine has for the most part, retained very little credibility for me. I don't lean this way to feel superior, or to look down upon those who do carry a spiritual mindset. This has more to do with rejecting concepts that no longer work into my sense of logic. I come from a very Christian upbringing only to realize I've been battling with cognitive dissonance most of my life. There was something wrong with the God concept in my mind, and in order to cope, I would aggressively stand with what I was raised with. It was a cycle of self deluding exercises and it costed quite a bit of my mental energy in order to remain steadfast. It became quite an effort to run around and ignore logical questions, answers, and theories. But all of that changed when I began to pay attention to these conflicts. In the end, religion and spirituality began to fall apart.

Neuroscience embarks on the journey to explain the soul. There's much to learn, and so much we do not know. But that makes life more interesting for me. Science reveals more beauty and ongoing mystery in the universe than spirituality ever could for me. Living my life with a huge question mark instead of an exclamation simply feels... appropriate? Logical? ...dare I say... worthy?

When I hear "Gods damn it" . I cannot help but cringe. Though it is judgmental and somewhat automatic reaction.

What might bug me is the air of rebellion that I am unable to separate from this gesture. Don't get me wrong. Rebellion can be a wonderful thing, as long as it doesn't become pretentious or masturbatory. At a certain point, it just feels forced and childish. And I know I am probably wrong for that broad brush-stroke assumption too. But it's something that happens either way, so why not put it out there?

I am fully aware that some people are raised with polytheism. This is not directed toward those people.

This is particularly about those who say "gods" in their everyday conversations as though it's some kind of attribute to being a furry.

I stand strongly with free speech. Anyone should say "gods" if they want to. Even if I don't like it. This post is simply expressing that it bugs me, and trying to understand why.

I do not want to start flame wars, but I am interested in learning more about how others feel.

Inflammatory comments are fine as long as their negativity is directed at me. No fighting bickering or squabbling among each other, okay? We're adults.

The move is officially done. I'm back online and the PC was miraculously undamaged during shipping. the box looked like an accordion rubbed with coal, so it was reasonable to feel worried for a bit.

We just got internet working here... took so long because Comcast sucks. they are probably the most obnoxious thing to deal with during this move thus far. But like the Bay area, it's a government approved monopoly in these parts as well... what else is new?

We've made the right decision to move way out here in Indy. Though we are in a much better living situation than ever before, we are also jobless for the time being. There are a few decent looking opportunities thanks to our friends here, but for now, I must livestream to make ends meet. Thank you so much for your support, and for those of you who helped make this move possible.

hop on if you want to watch some art! I should be up and running 5 - 6 days a week until we can get other jobs.

Hop right on in to watch some art happen. http://www.livestream.com/drayjaydraw

I don't know how many of you have had experience or have acquired the know how... but the options I've searched through online seem to make me feel like I am very ignorant and easy to rip off.

I cant afford to be ripped off anymore. it's kind of the reason why we're leaving the state.

What would the very best (meaning cheapest) method of transportation be? we are two adults who want to move from California to Indianapolis. We can fit all of our things into a minivan. But all the rates i'm finding are extremely expensive. There are no services that allow for cargo vans to be taken one way. And the next cheapest option is already far too expensive for our budget.

How do we avoid this?

is there some other method of moving across country that we are unaware of?

I really want this to be our last move for at least 5 or more years. This is ridiculous. I want to focus on career, and community...not survival.

So in about 2 weeks, I'm moving out of San Leandro.

We are still trying to secure a place in the Bay Area. (around Daly City) However it doesn't look too good. Prices are high as hell, and one job + livestream isn't going to cut it.

Sending out applications, emailing everywhere, talking on the phone with career aid people and possible employers.... none of it seems to change my situation soon enough. I have a 4 year degree in game art & design, yet it seems I am incapable of finding work soon enough.

So near the end of the month, there's going to be an inevitable cut off. I wont have access to a computer, but it may last for more than 5 days if it turns out me and will be leaving California altogether. Rent elsewhere is just so much lower.

Trouble is...even though I've been saving money from all the work recently, we don't know if we can afford that final moving van + the gas to take us safely to our destination. So please forgive if I seem a tad worried on livestream today.

How much do you guys like Phyco?

Those of you who enjoy the character are in for a treat. My upcoming CD folio (or digital download) release of the summer is going to focus a lot on Phyco, and his unique sexual situation. Especially the origins of his ...unique sexual situation.

But it gets better. Instead of it just being a 30+ image strong digital gallery and a few comic pages, this CD/download is going to contain an actual interactive visual novel!

So far, I have the first scene coded in and completely finished. There are going to be a few choices part way into the story, and a fair amount of extras. This is an actual story with dark humorous elements and lots of sexually explicit content with artwork and sound to support it. In addition to the interactive visual novel, the gallery containing 30+ full colored, exclusive images will also be accessible.

Though the interactive story and the gallery will feature Phyco primarily, there will still be a few other characters making appearances. So far there's 3 guest characters, and I'd like to add more if possible. Commissions for a spot in the CD will begin in July. (normal rates apply)

progress on this is happening very fast. I'd like to have this finished by August or September at the very latest. The biggest difficulty so far would be sound and music... overall sound design. I could certainly use some help in this department.

Keep an eye out for a preview later this week. (hopefully)

Though this CD/download will contain more content than usual, I intend to keep the price the same as my previous CD releases.

In addition, I want to discuss the utilization of Offbeatr. This will allow me to treat this project as an actual job for the next few months. (alongside my other job hunting efforts) I have a number of prizes planned for supporters, and I'd love to hear your input for more prize ideas.

So far, the list of donation prizes are:

- Digital Download
- Poster featuring Phyco (you can chose between a soft version or a hardcore version.)
- Special Download (more extras)
- Coffee Mug with humorous sexy design (safe for work)
- Pair of panties that Phyco actually wears in the story (so small that you can easily hide this from your roommates.... or parents)
- Squishy Boob mouse pad featuring Phyco (for the more daring supporter)
- 8 inch tall printed sculpture. (Phyco pole dancing)

Thanks a lot for your support. My internet is finally back on track, and I'll be spending whatever time I have left livestreaming commissions both new and old. Most likely starting tonight.

We relocated so that we can financially recover, and to take advantage of a much easier commute for the boyfriend. Things are rough still. Those student loans are devastating, the job hunt is still on... We're doing what we can. Below are some things I hope to achieve/address/progress/etc. during this month. A major goal is to make at least 1000 USD so we can start wiggling ourselves out of debt.

More livestreaming. Face it, this is the closest thing to an income I've ever had. I highly appreciate the support from you guys. You've kept me from drowning so many times, it's not even funny. I will try and livestream daily from here on out.

In addition we have TWO new art CDs in the works. One is about Phyco's unique sexual experience and transformation, featuring 30 never before seen works. The other is about DrayJay being a diabolical art dealer/gallery owner who specializes in erotic photography featuring how far he can transform his victims volunteers. This contains over 30 colored works, including a few pages of comic, a nifty menu and a few extras. I intend to have at least one of these finished by the middle of Summer. Much like the past 2 art CDs released, these will feature similar themes and scenarios. Keep an eye out for a preview of both this month.

Finally we have past due commissions. I'm chipping away at this list still. I will continue to try and finish one per livestream session.

-Jack
-Feather Dragon (awaiting information)

-Regulator (still awating scan!)
-Dasa ? (2 character sketch)
-DrayLen (colored sketch, 2 characters)
-ForeRest (Badge)
-Alistar (2 Character commission)

-TaikuShikami
-TaikuShikami
-Darkkfear & TaikuShikami
-Atung231
-Darkvulpine2
-SwordFox
-StrredWolf
-BrokenWing

---

That's it i guess. Will update with information regarding the CDs as soon as I can.

Car's fucked, engine is destroyed. Will cost more to fix it than to just buy another piece of crap. It is official.

My boyfriend and I are now car-less. What does one do? He saves up for a new...used car right? oh wait. what's that? student loan company knocking on my door? What do they want? oh?

right.


that.

Man. Fuck Dodge vehicles. Here we fucking go again. MORE goddamn car trouble. really? yeah. And it's something new this time. Smoke everywhere, a violent rattling and a sudden maximum speed of 5MPH , top it off with a horrid burning smell. Had to leave the car in front of some Indian supermarket for the night.

Here I am again begging for money because I have no other realistic options. TRYING to get a fucking job as soon as possible. TRYING to make this life in California work. I'm doing everything by the book, but if you're from the poor house, then every little problem suddenly becomes a massive life halting issue. needs to go to work every day, and the only way he can get there is if someone takes him to the train station. what happens if I cannot even take him there anymore? are we both simply fucked? what happens if I am already hitting zero in my bank account, using livestream commission money just to buy rent food and toilet paper? what happens when your only means of transportation decides to shit all over your already struggling efforts to get by? And while this is all happening, what happens when loan companies start calling you multiple times a day, threatening to do all sorts of horrible things to your credit? give me a fucking break, I just graduated a few weeks ago, pardon me for not getting a job right out the goddamn door.

fuck this shit.

Online Presence

So i'm having a lot of fun finishing everyone's commissions and also being active on livestream. I want to do more of this if possible, and even working a full time job in the near future, i'd love to do some livestreaming on the weekends.

I am finally done with school. Yup. I've graduated. It's taken me a few weeks to really let that hit me. Now on the lookout for some kind of stable income in the bay area. Maybe I can move so close to wherever I'm working that I can just bike there daily. Ideal. I work hard, and I'm talented. The trick is making an employer see that.

Commissions

But I cannot say I am a skilled professional in full confidence without at least first taking care of some unfinished business.

I'm talking about some of you guys. Specifically that last handful of overdue commissions I've got on my plate. I want them done right, but I don't want that to hold me back longer than it already has. Especially for the length that you've been made to wait.

So lets try and tackle one at a time.

ANTHROCON 2011

Jack (cannot find ref sheet or FA!)
Feather Dragon (awaiting information )

FURTHER CONFUSION 2012

-Regulator (still awating scan!)
-Dasa (2 character sketch)
-DrayLen (colored sketch, 2 characters)
-ForeRest (Badge)
-Alistar (2 Character commission)

ANTHROCON 2012

-TaikuShikami
-TaikuShikami
-Darkkfear
-Darkkfear & TaikuShikami
-Atung231
-Darkvulpine2
-SwordFox
-StrredWolf
-BrokenWing

---

New art collection coming out

In other news, I'm working on the new CD/comic collection for the year. Some previews and promo art is in order!

Right... I'm not going this year :-/

Too many obstacles right now. Will try and make it to the AC later this year. But even that is uncertain.

I will be available on livestream after this weekend is over.

Do have fun guys!

So it was exactly what we thought it was. My car had problems with the brakes. But unfortunately it was a lot worse than I had anticipated. Now I am 700 dollars poorer because so many parts had to be replaced due to conditions that were between severe wear and tear.... and absolutely destroyed. We're talking metal to metal. The drum, the brake shoes, the rear cylinders, etc. and to top it off, it needed a brake fuel flushing. for the longest time, I thought it was my imagination that my car was being held back. turns out the rear cylinders had seized up, causing a mild brake tapping experience, which would also cause the car to smell like something was burning after long rides. This wore things down until they virtually fused together.

just when I was about to have SOMETHING that resembled some actual "saved" money.

i am so...so very tired ._.

Only way around this is more livestreaming I suppose. Going to have to treat it more like an actual job, and less like a thing I do between classes.

I also need to update my system that I use to keep track of everyone/everything, payment plans, etc.


In other unrelated news, I've been working on a huge secret project, which I'm trying to not keep so secret these days. I've recently found a much better engine that suits me, and have begun building the foundation for something that may consume my life for quite a bit. As soon as a minute long trailer is complete, I would love to recruit some interested game designer peoples from this end of the internet. Mostly for testing, scripting, and some other assistance constructing it's extremely complex map system, scenarios, and character abilities. If the kickstarter is successful, I would like to hire for the short term, so that having some major chunks of the game completed and pieced together this year can be a possibility.

This will be a PC game. Though the presentation is more akin to the PS1 sidescroller.

A Tumblr that contains the game and it's information is coming soon guys.

I first of all want to thank everyone who left bits of advice in the last journal. I really appreciate the valuable insight. Unfortunately, not much of it was needed because the scenario changed up really fast... kind of for the better, but I dont really feel that way.

So we finally contact someone who seems on the level... however my skeptical mind reads this as the usual good cop/bad cop technique... first giving us an outrageous miserable fee, and then "slashing it down" and behaving responsive to Vir's circumstances to make them look helpful. It seems like there was a lot of miscommunication, though again, my skepticism reads this as intentional. I don't trust these guys and I never will. My boyfriend just wanted this ordeal to be over, so he just paid the diminished fee (mind you, the end result is far more reasonable than some of the horror stories I've heard) But it still sucks.


We dropped the car off at the nearby auto shop, and are awaiting the estimate tomorrow morning. Hopefully things wont be too terribly expensive, and i really hope these guys are somewhat legit... In any case, lets just hope for the best.

And now we come across the bad news.

ON the way home from dropping Vir at the train station today, my car starts to make a quiet hissing sound. and it appears that there's something wrong with the right side. Momentum is dramatically affected and it feels like i'm tapping on the breaks when I release the gas. This is accompanied by a burning rubbery smell. -___- now MY car suddenly has a problem... What the hell. I'm guessing it could be burnt or busted bearings on the right front wheel.

I dont have time or money for this dammit.

Car is parked on the street parking area near my place. Thinking of what to do with it tomorrow.