People who know me might already know about this, but a few years back I had a really good friend from the forums/ eventually Discord, PolarizedBear on FAF. At the end of July 2018, he sort of just disappeared, and we never saw sign of him since.

Sometimes I wonder if I should have reached out to him more, told him how much he meant to me. But it's been almost four years, and I guess that means he's probably not coming back. I should probably be over this by now, but it's hard not knowing what happened and still having that part of you hoping they'll show up again.

I'm a different person than I was back then, but I still wish I at least knew what was going on with him. Maybe I could have been there.

He could be okay, he could not be. I don't know and I don't think I will ever know.

I don't use FA too much socially, so you can usually find me on Twitter! My @ is dragomaster214 . I also have Discord (heavily preferred) and Telegram, so you can ask for my @s there too.

Check it out here!!!

https://www.furaffinity.net/view/31003532/

Hey guys.

So, a friend of mine is accepting commissions, and he does some really cool weapons and really, really awesome icons. If you're interested in something like that, here's a link to his info.

http://forums.furaffinity.net/threa.....teeth.1650691/

He's honestly a great dude, and deserves as much attention as he can get.

Playing along with a situation in a picture shouldn't be called an RP comment. Jokingly saying, "yeah, go, good job!" Shouldn't be an issue.

What SHOULD be an issue is unwanted lewd comments. Unwanted ACTUAL attempts to interact with a character. But, simply playing along with a situation should not cause you stress. You can ignore it. It is harmless and it's an attempt at humor.

I accept not liking RP. I don't fully understand it- characters are beings and should be able to interact with other characters with some level of freedom- but I accept it. But there IS such a thing as being too strict. If you are too strict, you stress yourself out unnecessarily. Sometimes you need to lay back a little. Calm down instead of working yourself into a rage over it.

Stuff I like:
-Wrestling
-Submission Holds
-Chokeholds
-Muscle
-Getting Spanked
-Getting dominated
-Getting punched in the face
-Romance
-Cuddling
-Aftercare
-Vanilla
-Fantasy Settings
-Consensual
-Playful struggling (Me struggling.)
-Hands
-Handpaws
-Wrestling or MMA Gear
-Hand/Handpaw on mouth

Maybe:
-Oral
-Dominating, spanking, or winning. (It has to be a mood.)
-Minor Hypnosis (Suggestions. Not mind control, free will is fully retained.)
-Fear (Me being afraid.)

No:
-Death
-Cuts
-Burns
-Fatal Vore/ Vore

HARD NO:
-Loss of Free Will (This is a very big fear of mine IRL... A bit of manipulation is fine, but I must ultimately regain control or else the RP will cease to become kinky and will end.)

Yeah, this journal is gonna be extremely gay. Sorry 'bout that. Click the back button if you're not into that. 0.0

I'm in the mood to get dominated by a big, muscular wrestler. Preferably one wearing a luchador mask.

I can play either a human jobber or an anthro one, but I won't go for my main wrestling characters because I'm new to this sort of thing and they're meant to be veteran wrestlers.

...
If anyone's interested, please note me. Or comment and then note me.

Hey everyone,

I know you’ve probably never spoken with me. Heck, until recently, I never had the courage to speak to you. But this is important regardless. It has to do with the decentralization of our community, and how we, as a community, should attempt to repair it.

I’ve seen it a couple of times. “It’s hopeless,” you say. “A burning ship. Best to leave and let it sink.”

I ask you this: What will happen once this place disappears? Do you think that the people damaging this place will go away with it?

Maybe I’m wrong, but I highly doubt they’ll just disappear. No, once this place, this possible central hub of our community disappears, they will find new places. And guess what? Those places will be where you went to escape. And, because people gave up on fixing this place, our decentralized community will be incapable of fighting back.

This place hasn’t lost hope, even if some of you have. There is still a chance to fix this site, a chance to make it better. Perhaps a chance to make it better than it ever has been. Yes, there have been rough spots. The staff has been difficult to sway in fixing this place, in changing site policy, and the DDOS attack a couple of years ago was kinda frightening. But guess what?

You’ve only failed when you’ve given up. I’m not willing to give up.

Why is this so important to me?

This place is my home. Yes, there’s Twitter, and a few other sites, but it’s not the same. This place saved me. Those other places? They may be nice, but they’re not nearly as well used as this place. They didn’t give me a place to exist without fear of myself. This place did. It saved me, and so now I’d like to at least try to save it.

Maybe I’m an idiot, a foolishly loyal young adult who doesn’t know when to give up. But I can tell you this: I WONT give up. I’ve learned that good things come from trying, and I’ll put every ounce of my strength in trying to save this ship. Maybe I’ll fail, maybe there really is no hope. But, in all honesty? Hope isn’t gone until you let it go.

So here’s my plea: Don’t stop. Keep moving. Keep trying, and keep pushing, because the only way to rescue a ship is to try. Change in a community comes from within, not without. This is supposed to be a place where decent people can gather and feel welcomed. Let’s do everything in our power to change it for the better. Let’s put everything we have into saving this place, because in the end? A site like this one may never come around again. If we waste this opportunity, then we waste a huge chance to actually BE a community. We won’t ever be perfect, but we CAN be better. So let’s try. Try even harder. Because in the end, running away won’t solve our problems. Facing our issues, and coming out as a stronger community because of it?

That’s how we solve things. All other methods just damage the situation.

Thank you for your time.

I've had writer's block for the past few days, but it's getting better.

I'm working on a couple of school projects, right now, so I'm going to give it time before I go too deep into RP or story writing. I have a chapter of something that I'll be trying to get ready to post, though, had a sudden inspiration...

The thing might become open for a collab, in the future. If it doesn't work out, then I'm gonna go for a dramatic sad ending, because I feel like playing with people's heartstrings a little atm. (In terms of stories, not actual manipulation. I'm not a jerk, just a writer.)

It's a pic of my doggo. It was posted on the forums a few months ago!

It's going to be there until I can create a character to use as my fursona... And then get art.

Hmm... I might use two characters.

It usually means that I like them, but I'm being really shy and want senpai to notice me.

Oh, just realized that that sounds weird.

Oh well!

I wish I had the self confidence to be able to try and write stories for people in trades for art.

:-/

Of course, I know I have some level of skill, but I don't know if it's something that's enough for people to be willing to trade with me.

Hmm... I'm going to post my first chapter of my novel. Keep in mind, my main genre is fantasy, but I might start working on other stuff too.

Yeah, so I've decided that I'm going to post chapters of my novel on here and on Fictionpress. I would like to request that readers please leave reviews and critique. Please understand that this will be hopefully published someday, so when I start that process I will remove the works from both Fictionpress and here.

The final version will hopefully be sold in bookstores one day, but until that time comes, I want you guys to enjoy it and help me become a better writer!

Also, I might try writing some naughty stuff with my wrestling OC I made a bit ago, but I dunno...

O//w//O

Thanks to all of you who commented on my last journal. I'm happy to know that I'm not alone, and I'll try and get in contact with you when I have the mental energy to do so.

Also, I'm going to be uploading more of my chapters from my current fanfiction project, so please take a look at those. Be sure to leave a comment! I need some constructive criticism.

Thanks again!

I realize that people may not read these journals, and I'm probably just speaking to the air here, but I'm not doing well right now. I just need to say some things, and I figured here is the best place to do it.

I'm 18, yes,and in my final year of Highschool. But I'm also alone. I have friends, but they don't know about the fact that I am gay. IRL, only three people know. But they're not even part of my family, and, embarrassingly enough, all thrre are girls who had an interest in me. In dating.

But I don't live in an area where I can feel safe talking about my sexuality openly. So no one knows that I'm gay, and even if I could start dating, I don't know if the type of people that I'm attracted to are even present at my school. Right now, I am so lonely that it's not even funny. I can't handle this.

I'm on the forums, and it's helped, but I really wish I could start spreading out across the people I watch. Unfortunately, I know that most people are busy. And, with my interests being what they are, and with my lack of a fursona, I think that most people I want to talk to aren't interested in talking with me. I've sent a few notes, and I only have gotten one response back.

I want to talk to people, and with me, that does mean RP sometimes, but I feel like I won't ever be able to, because I don't have a fursona, and I don't know anyone well enough to RP one-on-one.

I dunno what to do anymore... I can't go on feeling alone like this.

I'm more socially active on the forums than I am here. If anyone wants to get to know me, find me there. The name's DragonMaster21.

Though shooting me a note or commenting on something is cool too. I need to improve my comfort zone.

This is just me jotting down my thoughts. Don't pay too much attention, none of it really matters anyways. This includes both jokish and legitimate wants and haves.

10 Things I Want
10. More King art. He's my favorite character in the Tekken series, and art of him, while not scarce, isn't a common thing. Ideally, he is in his wrestling gear, as that really completes the look. (And makes him even hotter.)
9. The ability to put myself out there. I want to have more confidence socially, and sometimes, that can be really difficult.
8. More Wrestling art in general. To be completely honest, while I like complete NSFW, when it comes to wrestling, the gear is where it's at. And the muscle. Definitely the muscle.
7. Publish a Novel. My main genre is fantasy, and while my current project may be fanfiction, there is another one that I plan on attempting to publish once its complete that is completely my own.
6. A PS4. I got the XBox One because Skyrim would actually have proper mods. But PS4 has everything else good, Persona and Final Fantasy in particular.
5. A job. I am a hard worker, but life already drains most of my will away as it is. If I want to get into college, or work on and actually have the ability to publish my novel, I need a job. Unfortunately, in our ridiculously stupid society, it doesn't matter if you can do something great unless you have a multithousand dollar education to go with it. Even if you could learn the same things on your own and probably get more out of it.
4. A relationship. I'm so tired of being alone, but I am terrified of having people take ny sexuality the wrong way. My best friend is the person I would trust my life to, but I don't want to make him uncomfortable knowing that I am the way I am.
3. People to take me seriously. I am the quiet guy. Sometimes, my ideas are ignored because of that.
2. Eventually I want to go into politics. I know it sounds ridiculous, but people need a normal person leading them- not someone who has an agenda. I am sick of seeing profits come before morals.
1. The ability to make other people gain this thing called Common Sense.

There are a few chapters of Zootopia: Tragic Miracle that I have uploaded to Fanfiction.net, but not here. That will be changing shortly.

I have decided on my New Years Resolution.

Ever since sixth-grade, I have subconsciously chalked up my self-worth to my grades and to what other people think of me. For six years, I have depended on the judgements and thoughts of other people to decide whether or not I am an asset to society. This has brought me nothing but pain and self-loathing. I take pride in my successes. But when people ignore them in favor of my failures, the good things don't matter.

No more. I will no longer determine my life's worth based upon whether I have all my assignments in on time. This is my life. And I will work to learn, and to get a job, but my dreams come first. I will work my ass off. But my mental health will always be more important than anything else.

And as long as I am happy with myself, then that's all that matters. If that simple request is fulfilled, then all other successes can more easily follow.

Merry Christmas, everyone. May your days be happy, and your winters white.

Because in MN, the snow is kind of... Sad.

I really don’t.

Welp, guess its time to hide in my basement again.

No one is invincible, and I am no different. I have my strengths, and I have my weaknesses. I shall start with the latter. All of these strengths and weaknesses are true only in my natural human form.

Curses- as a spiritual entity inhabiting an avatar composed of reality sustaining energy (AKA magic energy), I am highly susceptible to negative energy produced both by entities influenced through witchcraft and by true magic. Whilst I may detect both, I am nearly defenseless against either of them.

Forced Tethering- Despite my reasonably strong will, my defense against spiritual suppression and control magicks are mediocre at best, and it is completely humiliating and dehumanizing to have my will and emotions suppressed for any reason. It should be understood that this weakness does not extend to witchcraft that attempts to emulate this type of suppression.

Physical Harm- unless in dragon-man form, I am fairly underwhelming in terms of damage resistance and physical strength.

Now, for strengths.

Knowledge of Magical Lore- I am familiar with most forms of magic, the laws that apply to them, as well as the methods used to ignore or circumnavigate them.

Magical Knowledge- I am fairly skilled in most forms of magic aside from summoning. As a spirit, I do not use witchcraft or shamanic magic. Infact, I can not. Both of those branches of magic are reserved for mortals who, for one reason or another, choose not to study true magic but still seek power.

Shape-shifting- I can shapeshift into several different forms.

As a spirit of magic, I have many forms that I can manifest myself in alongside my dashingly charming true, human form. (Just kidding, I'm ugly.) There is almost no limit to what I, a spirit of nature and magic, can become. Regardless of the form I take, I have abilities to form contracts with willing vessels in the form of friendships or mutual agreements. These contracts grant me a larger pool of magical energy, and supply the other party with protection against unnatural threats, such as black magic or, in some cases, possession by a demonic force.

My normal, natural form is that of an 18 year old human male. In this form, I can fly, transform, and use most forms of non-species specific magic at will. The cost of this magic depends on the time of day, and whether I have contracts with willing vessels or not. Magic in this form always has a cost.

My second, and favorite form, is that of a black cat with white fur around my ears. In this form, I can sense other spirits and use hypnotic magic. Also, I can ask for backrubs all day and not do any work whatsoever. It is a very fun job, posing as an ordinary house cat. I could do without the catnip, though.

My third form is that of a mouse. We do not talk about this form. It is a forbidden topic.

My fourth form is that of an anthropomorphic dragon. Basically, a scaly. In this form, I can manipulate my size and body mass at will. And I don't need to watch what I eat or how I exercise, because I have full control over my body’s appearance and composition. I also gain innate control over fire and lighting magic in this form, without cost.

My final form is difficult to explain. I can unmake my physical form and enter a spiritual state. Therefore, my supernatural abilities are drastically different in this state than in my physical ones. I essentially become a super-charged ghost. I can move objects, summon objects, create dreams, pretty much anything your run of the mill ghost can do. But it takes more energy to recreate my body than it does to unmake it. I usually only use this form when I am nearly dead, as recreating my body returns it to it undamaged form

Its been so long since I've hosted or participated in one, and I'm really feeling like starting again. I tried to host a couple on the forum, but... Well, I'm not great at consistency, and I pretty much quit. Its embarassing to admit it.

Does anyone know a good service where I can try to do one? I need people who are interested in fantasy stuff and are able to go with the flow. If I have gaps in response, I need people to be okay with that.

The most important thing is patience right now. If anyone's interested, I can supply some ideas here.

Everything Dies.
To exist is to cease existing, they are one and the same.
However, no matter how much is forgotten, nothing can erase the universe's memories.
It is by this truth mortals cling to a dim hope,
For even when they are forgotten, they shall always have existed.
And therefore shall always exist.