this year has been a struggle I have been haveing so many medical symptoms but my doctor nor the ER when I go there can figure out what the fuck is wrong with me... today is turning into one of those unplseant days.... I want to scream and cry over it all... but all I can really feel is rather heavy tiredness... and numbness to emotion....

I don't know how long it is going to be before I crumble into a blubbering mess hell I am not sure exactly if I will on the day my mother passed 7 years my father for uncertain reasons has taken his own life, I think I might still be in shock I don't know when I will be able to move on and I don't know what the future holds now other then sad frustrations.... when I needed help he was the one I turned to the most and now he is gone and I am at a loss... I find no desire to enjoy the porn I used to I have not enjoyed myself in that ever since find out... I don't know when I will ever settle into this horrified new "normal"

furaffinties age thingy gots me confused.... I feel it should be showing me as 29 years old cause I felt for sure that come my next birthday I should be turning 30.... but seeing as it has my correct birthday and is showing my age as 28... I am very confused....

my mother has passed on to greener pastures..... she passed 4/15/2017... she passed due to a blood clot in the heart... forever more will I remember as best as my shitty memory will allow me... who she was what she was... and what she meant to me..... remember me in your day to day thoughts... as I remember her in mine

well I finally got my hands/paws X p on a camera so now hopefully I will be flooding my page with pics of all sorts.. now if only the weather and my bike would behave

soon with in this month or next I will start adding art to my site.. I hope someone can start seeing it and enjoy it.. it will be pictures taken with a camera 24.1 mega pixel digital camera

it came to me in a dream.. no longer is it a wolfragon... no it is a lava dragon.. and I enjoyed what little of the dream I could enjoy.. cause some damn fucking phone call about some fucking trip to Mexico... I was so happy in the dream.. I hope it comes to me again tonight

it is coming today it is 3 am in the morning and it should be here sometime in the evening.. I am thinking about posting a pic of it when I get it

I have ordered me first toy.. and I hope to order many more in the futer... I so can't wait till it gets here...mmm... so many late nights full of fun on the way

saving up enough money somehow to get a new camera... a new computer... a few private items... a new bike... and even more far flung into the futer drivers license and a car or truck of some sort

my god got pranked so many different times... once by my mother in a kinda upsetting way that I can't hold against her, and another by bad_dragon.com thought they were going to the humans.. was kinda sad

hoping one day to maybe get another camera I enjoy cameras but it's been awhile since I last had one. Also this year marks the time where I am sick f putting it off... going to get me a drivers license if my finances can keep them selves in order looking at having to rush to find some kind of job in the near future... and that is not going to be fun in the slightest.