A little over a year ago, I wrote a journal explaining that I wasn't happy with the way things were going, and that I may come back someday when I was ready to seriously tackle Dr. Trait's story. At this point, I can honestly say that's not going to happen.

I think the biggest problem was trying to shoehorn what I wanted to do into the My Little Pony fandom. Even though I've enjoyed ponies for years and probably still will, what I wanted to do just doesn't work with quadrupedal equines. I tend to think in very ridged, mechanical terms, which makes it hard to work out how ponies could make certain gestures; bones and joints just don't work that way (see also, Pinkie Pie).

Moving into 3D only made it worse, and then the whole kinktonary and WHISPER story ideas were just distractions that compounded the existing issues. Ultimately, the only way to really salvage my original idea is to start over from scratch, without including ponies or some shady organization into the mix.

However, I'm not going to delete this account. What's up will remain up, and people can take it or leave it. If I do end up creating a new account to start everything over, I'll put a link in this account's bio.

Until we meet again, good bye.

This has been building for a while now, but I think I'm going to bow out of this account.

To make a long story short, I feel constrained, like I'm chained myself to a very narrow range of possibilities. This account ended up being about a character, rather than a general hub for art, and I feel like that's left me shackled to one idea that hasn't really been able to take off.

I've thought about recreating this account as a general purpose thing like I feel I need, but I've sort of built things around it being the way it is. Maybe it's just me, but I think the best thing is to create a new account and leave this one dormant until I'm ready to tell Dr. Trait's story properly. That might be months, years, or never, but I don't want to throw out what I've done to make room for something else.

I dunno. Maybe this isn't making sense. It's been a bad week and I'm just not having fun with this idea anymore.

We'll see.

This month has been one hell of a year.

We've been in lockdown since March 23rd. Local statistics have been showing roughly 300 new cases of COVID-19 each day, though we've been fortunate enough to have avoided it so far.

Most of my time has been spent dealing with computer-related issues or trying to relax with various games rather than drawing or working with Daz Studio, so things like my writing and the Kinktionary have been largely put on the back burner recently. As you might have guessed, I'm trying to get back to producing content rather than just talk about it, so hopefully I'll be releasing more of the Kinktionary in the near future.

I mean, I've collected around 60 prompts for the thing. It's not like I don't have *ideas* right now.

Spaceballs is a pretty famous movie, even today, so I'm going to assume y'all remember that one scene where Dark Helmet is fed up with everybody preparing to do stuff. That mirrors my own feelings towards my own art lately -- I'm always preparing, but never doing. And instead of falling on my ass when the vehicle starts moving, I'm just wasting time telling everyone how cool things will be once I'm ready to start rendering.

So, I decided to ignore the age old wisdom about comparing yourself to others, and flipped around DA and FA, looking through the galleries of people who are drawing things similar to what I'd like to create. And I noticed something that was worth pointing out (to others and myself).

The artists who spent time developing stories and detailed backgrounds often lost their subjects in the process. Contrariwise, those who focused on the subject to the exclusion of the background lost very little; they were still able to tell their stories, just in a slightly different manner.

This leads me to believe that I'm trying too hard to make a "masterpiece" when I really just want to play with my characters and share some interesting things. Other artists might be making the same mistake, so I wanted to share this discovery publicly. In the meantime, I'm more or less hurrying through what's actually needed asset-wise so I can get back on track.

TLDR: You don't need fancy backgrounds or elaborate setups to make neat stuff -- in fact it might be better to leave the background out altogether.

So I've been quietly working on new models and other assets that I'll need for 3D artwork, and I've been moving towards a sort of science fiction theme. Naturally, I'm searching around for references and design ideas; getting a little inspiration from Star Trek here, some zeerust concepts there, and mixing it together to make something that looks realistic enough to be passable.

But one thing that stands out is that in science fiction, nobody sleeps well.

Seriously, nearly any science fiction bed design looks like it would be about as comfortable as a slab of concrete. Most are just fancy boards with a thin sheet over them. You're going to wake up with some serious back and neck pain if you sleep in any of these beds, that's for sure!

Now, I don't know how many people actually read these journals, but I still think it's a good idea to let people know what's up now and then.

Specifically, some of you might be wondering why none of the content mentioned in the previous journal has appeared on here yet, and it's also possible that someone might be curious about the lack of updates on that Tumblr I started a few months back.

Well, to be honest, both situations are related. I've had some time to think about where I want to go with the concept of WHISPER, and that means establishing a given "look and feel" to the WHISPER outposts, official uniforms, and so on. To start with, I want to change the "logo" I gave the syndicate in the ask blog. Turns out, there's a car manufacturer who uses a very similar logo, and I'd like to be more original than that.

But there's another hitch: I don't have 3D resources for the sort of environments I'd like to depict. I'm not too fond of what's available for purchase/download in this genre either, so that means I'll need to actually craft the assets myself. That's been the big issue lately -- without those assets, I can't start working on the various comics / scenes I want to do.

There is also another problem with the Tumblr. Namely, the more I look into FO:E and Fallout in general, the more they don't really line up. Sure, FO:E is based on Fallout, but the history, technology, and event monsters are all unique in some way. This split wasn't something I expected, and I'm not really interested in studying up on two franchises in order to write my own little side story. But I don't want to just throw out Radia Rod and her adventures either.

So I've come up with a better idea. There's another science fiction themed video game franchise that I've always loved, and I already have most of the assets I'd need to depict stories from within that franchise. With a little luck, I think I can make the rest.

That other franchise?

Doom.

That is, the games from 1990s; as much as I enjoyed Doom 3, Doom 3: RoE, and DOOM (2016), I prefer the aesthetics from the classic games more. Also, this provides a better angle for the entire story. Why would WHISPER bother with a run down shell of a world (Fallout) when they have better tech and the resources of the multiverse at their disposal? On the other hand, they would see stealing useful tech from overrun UAC bases as a compelling reason to bother with a destroyed world (Doom).

Of course, I need a few more assets for that as well. So far, I've been trying to create a decent model for the old school style chaingun, and while each attempt improves on the ones before it, this isn't coming out quite right. But, I'm close to getting it right, and then it's only a matter of time before I have everything else in place.

At which point, the stuff I've planned on making will start coming out, and the Tumblr will get a reset to move it over to the new setting.

To make a long story short, I'm one of those people who's almost always thinking about something. This basically means that my characters will always have gone through many adventures (and revisions of old adventures) in my head before I finally get them on paper.

Rather than haphazardly post bits here and there, I was thinking it might be a better idea to start one story, see it through to the end, and then start another. But, instead of just picking them at random (or using whatever order catches my interest the most), I was wondering if there's something people on here would prefer to see first. Here's a list of things I'm planning on doing with Dr. Traits, and a few notes about each one. Of course, the end goal is to create and upload them all; the question is just which order I should do them in.

Soviet Revival Remix story - graphic content
A short story about one of Dr. Trait's earlier experiments, conducted while he was still considered to be a credible researcher. Based on a real (and horrific) experiment conducted in the Soviet Union back in the 1940s.

The Perfume Caper - story - TF / horror content
Before joining WHISPER, Dr. Traits still found ways to continue his experiments. One of his more successful experiments began by exploiting how trusting Equestrians are and a little chemical know-how.

Recruitment Day story - mostly backstory
Dr. Traits used to work for the Royal Guard as a medical researcher. After he proved to be extremely unethical, a warrant was issued for his arrest, and he fled to the streets of Manehattan. It was here that he was found by Bucking Bronco, and became a member of WHISPER.

The Wrong Can comic - TF / horror content
Meriel captures a Wood Elf from a rival clan, and while everybody's debating over what to do with intruder, Dale screws up and feeds the prisoner food from an unlabeled tin can. Everybody who's a fan of Nethack knows exactly where this is going.

Tamai and the Troops comic - Misc kinky stuff
What do you get when a kinky dragoness gets to do whatever she wants with a group of unlucky Equestrian Royal Guards? A lot of silly ideas, that's what. Nothing too explicit, just some risque fun with magic, mares & stallions. Basically, I ran across a kink prompt a while back, so that's where this idea came from.

Adventures with K-Gas comic - Misc kinky stuff
Originally I was going to handle a kink prompt using Tamai and some random Royal Guards, but while working on WHISPER in the Wasteland last night, I had a much better idea. Instead of having Tamai "play" with some hapless guards, we'll take a look at how nanotechnology, radiation, and weird science interact as Dr. Traits takes an opportunity to study the results of a mutagenic chemical disaster. Species of the victims will be random, as will their condition and reactions. Perhaps WHISPER will find something useful among the mutations, or perhaps the doctor's pants will just get a bit tighter.

Let me preface this by pointing out that I'm really only a beginner with Daz Studio and 3D modeling. I can make simple props and materials, but at this point, most of my stuff is purchased somewhere online. For example, Tamai is actually Genesis 3 with some elaborate morphs and tweaks, while Dr. Traits and most of the other anthro ponies are either Michael 4 or Victoria 4 with some lesser known morphs applied.

The problem I discovered yesterday night has to do with how all of these assets are stored. The way I set up my characters and their various parts and pieces won't work long-term. When you save a scene / scene subset, Daz doesn't package the individual pieces of the scene in the saved file. It only records what assets are used and how they've been manipulated. This means if I ever move a file, the saved data won't load properly.

In turn, this means that my "backups" of my characters and scenes are worthless. If I get a new computer or even just reinstall stuff on this one, they'll be broken and everything will be lost.

The solution is to go through and re-save everything via multiple steps and multiple types of exports, as well as move some of the data into the Runtime itself. Stuff stored in the Runtime folders is referenced by a relative filename rather than a fixed one, so it's a LOT less prone to misplacing things.

If I'd actually taken the time to create the characters "properly", this sort of thing wouldn't be an issue. But yeah, computers are a harsh learning curve sometimes.

I'm still going to try and make WHISPER in the Wasteland a weekly thing, so I'll be updating it around this mess.

People say that if you spend a lot of time thinking about something, you'll eventually dream about it. This has been true-ish in my experience, though it's been limited to things like My Little Pony or the concept of doing stuff on the computer. In other words, stuff I've surrounded myself with for years.

However, last night I actually dreamed about Fallout, which I've only been getting into recently. To be more specific, I dreamed about being part of a Vault that had gone the cryostasis pod route (eg, Vault 111 in Fallout 4's opening) except that things had actually worked as designed. I was one of a select few residents who were supposed to be woken first, so we checked the situation out, ensured things were in order, woke the remaining population, and headed topside.

Funnily enough, I woke up during the elevator ride to the surface.

About three weeks ago I asked about creating an Ask Blog based on FO:E and Dr. Trait's story. People liked the idea, so I've been working towards creating the assets I'll need for FO:E related stuff.

And I was going to launch the blog once I had several updates done, but I'm a bit too excited and impatient for that.

So without further ado, we have WHISPER in the Wasteland, at https://witwaste.tumblr.com/ !

Lately I've been getting into the Fallout series via Fallout: New Vegas, and it's giving me an idea.

I know a number of people on Tumblr run interactive comics called "Ask Blogs". Most of the ones I've heard of are My Little Pony related, but I was wondering if it'd be a good idea to try something like this using the Fallout universe. Originally I was thinking the main character could be a pony like Dr. Traits, but I'm not sold on that idea. WHISPER, the villainous organization that most of my characters are from, is supposed to be a multidimensional organization, so I could have this Fallout fanverse connect to Dr. Trait's storyline easily enough. The problem is, four of my seven characters are ponies, so adding a fifth pony doesn't feel right. I don't have a Furry character though, and I think I can make that work instead.

The main benefit of making an ask blog would be the experience with my 3D tools; I'm still learning how things work, and this would provide some direction with what I should try to do next. On the other hand, I'm only so far into the games and I'm betting that fans are going to ask questions I can't answer yet.

Anybody have some experiences / comments about this idea?

I'm not going to move on it for another week at least, as there's a lot of other stuff on my plate. But this is an idea I'm kicking around.

I had a long and detailed dream about My Little Pony.

The dream's plot went something like this:

I had won some sort of contest. The prize was that I'd be turned into a pony, and brought in as a "new recruit" for a group of royal guards. The plan was for the mane 6 and Celestia to spend some quality time together in the Ruby Caves (a location my dream created), with this group of guards acting as the princess' entourage. Sort of like a big fancy picnic in a big shimmering red/pink cavern.

And things would've been fine, if not for one small detail. You see, the reason the guards were brought along is that while the Ruby Caves were a beautiful, if remote, tourist attraction, they were also home to one of the known entrances to Tartarus. Yep, Celestia's habit of keeping her enemies close was about to bite everyone in the flank yet again.

A previously unknown evil decided to use this picnic as an opportunity to attempt escape, resulting in Celestia getting herself lost in Tartarus, cut off from the other guards and the mane 6. I ended up becoming the patsy in a twisted Freaky Friday plot and had to defend myself from the creatures lurking in the molten depths below.

While this was probably a disaster from a PR standpoint, I got to destroy an evil pony's phylactery (rendering them helpless and magicless) and blast Tirek in the face with a concentrated energy beam. So that's a win from my perspective.

To start with, here's a bit of background. Most of the stuff I've drawn over the years was either made using a puppet or based around some simple primitive designs (think art deco, icons, and other simple things). Before creating this account, I'd already made a basic pony puppet, a Royal Guard puppet, and a puppet for Dr. Traits himself. These puppets were intended to be reasonably realistic (or at least mostly anatomically correct). You see, where I want to go with Dr. Traits would be better serviced if I tried to avoid artistic license regarding equine biology. If you're curious, you can see the entire sideways facing puppet base in my skeleton image.

Ultimately though, I may have shot myself in the hoof by making the puppets the way I did. In fact, it might be a good idea for me to scrap using puppets entirely, and actually learn to draw the same thing from multiple angles. I'm keeping what I've already done mind you; it's just that I'm thinking of learning to draw things without using premade guides.

But, there's one other issue. I'm active over on Reddit, and recently something was posted over there that really shook me up. It was a graphic image of an injured horse. Okay, so the horse was already dead of natural causes when the "injury" happened, but that's an image I'm never going to get out of my mind. And now that it's stuck in there, I'm having a lot of trouble dealing with equines of any sort.

So I might change more than my art style in the near future. I'd like to stay near My Little Pony, but I may go with a humanized (Equestria Girls?), anthro, or more cartoony art style. On the plus side, r/ImSorryJon has made it clear to me that you don't need to be realistic to go into creepy / grimdark territory after all, so that's encouraging.