Nothing's ever going to fucking change, years I've tried my best to make things better. Why haven't I ended it all by now?

Nothing's ever going to fucking change, years I've tried my best to make things better. Why haven't I ended it all by now?

I haven't said much about it, but next week, I'll be going to West Virginia to join Job Corps for training. It's both terrifying and exciting, mostly terrifying though. They say job training there can take between 6 to 12 months. That’s a LONG time! Kind of scary to think of being away from home for such a large amount of time. Hopefully I’ll be able to get on during my downtime (if the WiFi is decent). I’m scared most of getting on a plane for the first time ever! Heights are scary! I just hope this will be the start to a good life with my sweetie.

So far it's fucking sucked and I've had to deal with a lot of shit...At this point I'd either like to die or find a way of this crazy mountain (The school is literally isolated on a fucking mountain...)

Considering not one person seems interested in my commission work, I'm just going to give up on that opportunity. Speaking of opportunities, I have yet to get a single response from any company about being hired. By now, I would have wished to have a new job, earning a little money, but nothing. At some point, I'm just going to stop caring and just wait for the welcoming grasp of Death's hand.

I'll be offer some sketch commissions to anyone interested. I left details on my deviantART journal here: http://e-matt.deviantart.com/journa.....ions-494018137

http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/6224183/
She can really use it right now, seeing how much she's gone through already.

Yes, it's another one of my depressing journals. But honestly, there's not a whole lot of good stuff going for me (aside from my girlfriend). Ever since being laid off from Amazon, I haven't been hired for anything else. It's been 8 months now and there's been no such luck. The issues with my family don't help out either. Maybe if I do finally get a job, I'll just distance myself from them and leave it at that. I don't think my art dream will matter either.

Well my Anniversary with my girlfriend was just last week, and we had so much fun together. we went to this nice buffet near my house and got to spend a bunch of time together. Here's to another year with you babe. Love you~

I hate Valentine's Day, I hate all holidays, I hate moving, I hate money, I hate family, I hate a lot of things....

You can find more of my work on my deviantART account (link is on my main page here). Just a FYI, if you still watch me XD

Anybody looking to talk/chat about anything?

I'm utterly depressed and feeling suicidal (again)......

Do you ever have any issues with friends that don't seem to get resolved?