Just... just so beautiful to think about it moves me to tears... and I can't stop thinking about em...

So the other week I mentioned that I was having an existential crisis about 2003 being 20 years ago, yeah? Well the actual reason is this:
https://na.finalfantasyxiv.com/lode.....ing/eykg76bc2d
https://na.finalfantasyxiv.com/lode.....308/1ny0ji96di
All the pomp and circumstance around FFXIVARR's 10 years has been going down (and the reminder that 2013 is 10 years ago naturally extends to a reminder that 2003 was 20) and now it's all come to a head with the actual in-game celebration events.
I've been here for 8 of them! And I've thought about this dumb videogame a frankly unhealthy amount over that time! You'd think that would give me a lot to say about the 10th but honestly I'm entirely at a loss! But also I felt kinda like I had to because it takes up a truly gargantuan sector of my brain and personality!

(I still think it was a cowardly move to basically ignore 1.0's 10th 3 years ago tho)

I thought I'd stopped lowkey freaking out about this in February.
I regret to inform you I have not; the unreasonably visceral nostalgia pangs are back:
https://youtu.be/RFEfpjOdN_M

https://youtu.be/dXRc8JeXk9U
(this one hits extra hard because FFTA is 1/2 of my furry awakening)

https://youtu.be/Brth8u4utLk

https://youtu.be/sm6Wy04Yaj0

That's all I've got in terms of Dawntrail right now, I am neither at nor able to watch fanfest so all I've seen is the teaser.



(Okay one more thing: Erenville is immensely smoochable in fancypants FMV, tho)

Hey, guess what I'm thinking about with that description!

TRICK QUESTION turns out it's actually FUCKING EVERYTHING
God I'm so fucking tired

Smooches from hot guys!
It's all I can think about right now!

everything is exhausting
all the time
forever
make it stop

Surely I'm not the only one who spends a disproportionate amount of Pride thinking - against my own will - about childhood traumas, right?
Right!?

(seriously why *does* the human brain gotta suck so bad)

(once again feel free to ignore me being whiny btw)

all the time
forever
make it stop



(Ignore me being whiny if you want, things have just been rough lately and I needed some sort of outlet somewhere)

I'm like a whole Atlantic Ocean away but holy hell is this coronation crap boring and tedious.
They should spice things up by doing it the French way instead.

You're in space.

so many goddamn things can make it go wrong in so many different ways
wish I could go to the brain store and get my money back

Still having that existential crisis over 2003 being 20 years ago, not sure why 2003 prompted it of all years but that's where I am right now.

More generally, I'm not exactly doing fine (especially mental health wise) but I'm managing surviving.

hey kid
got some more of them unreasonably visceral nostalgia pangs for ya
https://youtu.be/EypGdptd19M
https://youtu.be/9ud-q7NwvGc
different flavor this time; this strain ain't gonna be at its best until it hits 2005 nostalgia but it's still tasty stuff

(yes i know Symphonia was only a 2003 release in Japan, don't get pedantic with me this time either)

https://na.finalfantasyxiv.com/lode.....eeedbcd2deaeb2
(Scroll down to "the following items can now be equipped regardless of gender")
This is all stuff I'd written off as unlikely to get this treatment! I thought we'd run out of ways for me to get excited to see this section of the patch notes! Dang, man!

hey

hey kid

you wanna buy some unreasonably visceral nostalgia pangs
https://youtu.be/F6OAUTt7n2c
https://youtu.be/QIGMzr7Yj1k

(yes I know the former only came out in 2003 in Japan don't you get pedantic with me)

You know that one WikiHow guy-threatening-other-guy-with-knife meme where the attacker gets labeled with the current year and the victim gets labeled "me struggling to process [however much time]"? That's me since like 2014 or 2012 or so (or maybe just my entire adulthood, I dunno); really not mentally prepared to be a whole-ass third of the way through the 2020s.
I *am* coming up on a year of having my own apartment, plus I may be working out a way of getting my mental health issues somewhat under control soonish, so I guess that's something.


(Also, the "mmmmmm, sodomy" part of my brain is currently at war with the reclusive part of my brain so that's fun.)

I hope everyone's entertainment was sufficiently death-defying.

It's World of Final Fantasy, it turns out. Four years running! (Six if you count the PS4 release! (Which means it was the best Pokemon game for the Switch before there was even the Switch!))

Nope, still not deterred by the gratuitous celebrity stunt casting, still want Bowser to fuck me silly.

If you haven't left a response please consider:
https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/10388086/

Trying not to be as much of a perpetual nervous wreck as I am. Dunno how much it'll help considering the cause is, like, real life and current events and junk but still.

To the previous journal, I just realized I was super unclear, haha; I was actually referring to the artists themselves forgetting to upload the images, not anything with the comment sections. Have I accidentally been giving off "please don't upload this to your own gallery" energy or something?

So one of my favorite parts of commissioning artists on here is when they get to posting it to their own gallery; the reaction from people outside my own bubble is fun and I get a little limelight myself. Lately, however, it seems like it's becoming common for me to just get... forgotten about, like the whole batch I'm part of will go up except for mine. Do I have, like, a forgettable aura, or could I have accidentally given the impression that I *don't* want it to go up, or something? What should I do about this? (I *have* also considered that maybe subject matter has something to do with it but I don't tend to get stuff that would be out of place in its respective artist's oeuvre, even if it's NSFW or fetishy.)
(Also wish I could figure out a way to broach the subject in a way that's not too rude. :X )

(Sorry for the kinda weird and kinda whiny journal, but it *is* kinda making me paranoid, haha.)

https://tfwiki.net/wiki/Transformer.....park_(cartoon)
Still excited even if nobody who follows me is going to care!
...except I'm going to be at work all day. (Also I have to get my Paramount Plus situation sorted.)