The movie Anastasia fills me with rage. I just watched it for the first time. I don't actually have time to go into why it's so fucking awful right now, but I will. Oh, I will. I feel that I have a new purpose in life, and that is to spread the world about how fucking, offensively terrible this movie is.

Gonna upload my sister and brother-in-law's xmas present, which is ten pages. woo!

Also, someone give me the short explanation of why I should care about all the stuff that just happened? I get passwords were stolen, accounts were hacked, etc, etc. What's all the note nonsense? Somebody get access to our notes? If so, why the fuck should anyone care?

For a long time, I didn't like Christmas. I was sick of the materialistic aspect of it, I'm atheist so I didn't think I could reconcile the holiday with my personal beliefs, and I can't stand a particular member of my family.

But then I started asking my family to donate to charity instead of buying me gifts. And this year I decided to make everyone's gifts instead of shopping for them. I've come to appreciate Christian religion and have realized that I can be atheist and Christian if I want to be (I'm reading Jefferson's version of the New Testament now and doing some research into it). I actually enjoy Christmas music again, after being out of retail for over seven years.

What this is leading up to is that I would like to offer Christmas drawings to anyone who would like them (or belated Chanukah drawings, or solstice drawings, or whatever else). Just let me know. I may not get them done by Christmas, since I still have some presents for my family and friends to work on, but I will do them!

I'm lacking focus again and need to get myself warmed up. So throw an idea at me to draw.

So I'm doodling things that people throw out at me. So, want me to doodle something for you? Tell me here. I'll be doing this for a couple hours at least.

A random person asked me to draw a sandwich, which cracked me up. They're still looking for more, so draw them a sandwich! http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/1827318/

I always go out with my best friend, his husband, and whoever else we can gather up on Halloween. Last night was a blast. At one point, I was dancing at a bar called the Cuff and an older bear started dancing with me. He was really getting into it and told me my dancing was making him hot, which was when I realized that he thought I was a guy in drag. I felt really bad when he realized I was a girl. He looked disappointed and moved on to someone else.

I dressed up as my fursona, basically. None of my friends nor I have a working camera right now, so I just have some crappy cell phone pictures.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/corynn/5137653886/
http://www.flickr.com/photos/corynn/5137051565/

Gitai was Kevin Matchstick from Mage (comic book character if you don't know):
http://www.flickr.com/photos/corynn/5137048627/

Jonathan was Towlie. He made his own costume:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/corynn/5137652428/

Blacklights were our friends:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/corynn/5137669774
http://www.flickr.com/photos/corynn/5137065421

I'm staying with my mom and grandpa right now, and mom has no scanner, so I've been drawing a lot but only have cell phone pictures to show for it (my real camera died, sadly. But that means I can get myself something new and better as a xmas present to myself).

To further my adventures in gender bending, I am considering returning to work as a male (I've been on a leave for a bit). I ordered a binder that is specifically made for the purpose of helping FtM trans folks start passing as a man. I can't wait to get it, but that probably won't be for a couple weeks. I also really hope it fits. Due to my breast size, I may have to exchange it for a custom made one. I've always tried to be happy with the fact that I have huge boobs, but I've finally admitted to myself that I'm just not. When I'm able to, I'm definitely getting breast reduction surgery.

I just wanted to share my excitement about the binder, really. Now I have some RP stuff to write up.

I'm experimenting with facial hair. Someone told me about a method of taking some of your own hair and cutting it into very small bits then applying it to your face with false eyelash glue. I also found a method where you take the hair and just wet it with hairspray. I decided to start with the hairspray because I want to get a feel for what I want my facial hair should look like and it sounded like it would be easier to clean off. It is indeed easy to clean off. I forgot why my face tickled and accidentally wiped my soul patch off (I think it's a soul patch. I forget the terms for different kinds of facial hair). I hope the glue will be a little more difficult to wipe away. Oh, and I threw on some sideburns too.

Here's the results of my first try with facial hair:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/corynn/5053488562/
http://www.flickr.com/photos/corynn/5053488156/
http://www.flickr.com/photos/corynn/5053486736/

I'm vegetarian, though generally I don't get in other people's faces about it. I don't try to convince everyone to not eat meat, but I do encourage people to think about where their food comes from, and find alternatives to factory farmed animals.

Most of the turkeys you'll see for Thanksgiving are factory farmed. From the adopt-a-turkey project I'm about to link, here's some info: "Between 250 to 300 million turkeys are raised for slaughter every year in the U.S. — more than 46 million alone for Thanksgiving. Birds are typically packed by the thousands into dark, filthy factory farm warehouses, where they are allotted approximately three square feet of space in which to live. Debeaked and detoed without any pain relief, these birds are bred to reach a crippling weight at an unnaturally fast rate. When turkeys reach only 14 to 18 weeks of age they are transported to slaughter, often under harrowing conditions. Because turkeys and other birds are specifically excluded from the Humane Slaughter Act, which requires that animals be stunned prior to slaughter, their deaths are a brutal end to a miserable existence. "

If you've never met a turkey, they are actually very intelligent and friendly animals. I remember the first turkey I met followed me around all day while I was visiting his farm. He liked to be pet and to get his head stroked. He talked at me when I talked to him. I didn't go vegetarian for years after that, but now I wonder how I managed to eat turkey after getting to know one so well.

Adopt-a-Turkey ( http://www.adoptaturkey.org/aat/adopt/ ) asks that you make a one time donation of $30 to support an organization that saves thousands of turkeys a year and finds them loving homes. You get to pick one of their adoptable birds and they send you some info about it. The site also has meat-free recipes for Thanksgiving if you are able to go that far.

If you can't have Thanksgiving with Turkey, consider taking the time to find a less cruel alternative. Look for free-range, antibiotic free turkey. You have to be careful, because free-range doesn't necessarily mean that the turkeys lived good lives. Instead of being crammed in a cage, they could have been crammed in an open pen with hundreds of other turkeys. But if they're antibiotic-free, they're less likely to have lived in such conditions. Birds in crowded conditions have to be fed antibiotics to keep them from getting one of many easily transferable diseases. You could also buy a kosher turkey. I'm not completely clear on how kosher turkeys are raised, but in order to be kosher, there are strict rules that must be followed about ensuring the animal suffers as little as possible. Kosher turkeys are generally found frozen at the store around Thanksgiving time. If you live in an area that has small family farms, you might do a little looking around to see if you can purchase a turkey from them. All of these options are more expensive, but they're better for the turkeys and for you. Trust me when I say that in all three options, the birds taste waaaaay better than the factory farmed ones. And if you buy from a local farm, you're supporting a small, local business.

I might have more to say about turkeys from now through Thanksgiving. Who knows, I might even get a pet turkey myself since I'll potentially be living in an area where I can have one soon. I'm definitely getting chickens.

It's too hot and muggy to draw or anything. This is Seattle, for crow's sake. It's not supposed to get muggy. That's crappy-ass Florida weather.

I saw a couple of great panels yesterday at Rainfurrest. The best run art panel of the weekend far (I love prawst's panels, and learned a lot in the one he did when he wasn't drunk, but even that one got a little silly). And I finally made it to a fursuit panel where I got some great info about taking care of fursuits. I don't have one yet, but I have a tail that already needs to spiffing up after being worn all weekend.

I got a couple more sketches. Clover by  neolucky http://www.flickr.com/photos/corynn/5027585209/

(she's not fat enough, but she's still pretty hot)

And Scrae by  ebryn http://www.flickr.com/photos/corynn/5027585137/

Also,  graveyardgreg cornered me and got me to buy Deathless. It's not exactly that I didn't ever want to buy it, but I have such a huge pile of books right now that I need to read. Now it it slightly huger.

Today it's so miserable, all I'm doing is watching whatever Christopher Walken stuff is available for instant watch on Netflix. Oh and doing some RP online.

I have survived, despite spending much more time there today. I'm still mostly enjoying going to panels, though today it was really hit and miss on whether the panels would be good or not. Plus I wasn't aware of some changes that had been made, and missed a couple panels I wanted to see, and ended up in a couple that weren't that great. But I got to play pictionary with a bunch of drunk people, so that's cool.

The more I see people's fursuits, the more I want one (though I just want a partial one). I met a woman with an amazing realistic fox mask and asked who made it for her. I thought she said "mockingbird bones" but I can't find such a person. And since there is no such person, I hereby claim that name for myself. Because it sounds awesome.

PROTIP: If you are attending a panel, please stop constantly interrupting the people who are supposed to be the actual panelists. All the panelists I've seen so far have encouraged discussion and questions, but that doesn't mean that you, the one fat guy with the loud voice at the back, are supposed to take over the entire fucking thing. If you want to make everyone listen to you, get your own damn panel.

Oh did I mention that I got my new cpap and I'm able to sleep now? Yay!

Only the first day of it. It was fun. I like the art panels, even though the artist for the first one didn't technically show up (nobody told him he was doing the panel). I saw  prawst do one art panel and he was really fun (he asked for a reference sheet for a character to draw, and I was the fastest with mine. It was drawn digitally so I have no copy or anything). He also hosted a thing later in which he was supposed to show us some youtube videos, but no one actually brought a TV or computer or anything, so instead he drew awesomeness on a whiteboard and people hung out and acted ridiculous. Good times.

I commissioned a few things in the dealers den. I already got back a picture of Maia: http://www.flickr.com/photos/corynn/5022184856/ by  kitsumi

I didn't take many pictures today because if forgot my god damn phone. Because I'm a moron.

Oh well. I'll go back tomorrow!

I still don't have my cpap, but somehow I managed to stay conscious this whole day. Besides drawing something, finally, I put together a scrapbook of my Canada vacation. If you're curious, you can see it here:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/corynn.....7624860707091/

I have an idea. I feel an overwhelming urge to draw porn. If this persists through tomorrow, then I'll post a pic tomorrow and ask for folks to help me with some porn suggestions.

So I have sleep apnea. Basically, when I'm asleep, I stop breathing. My sleep apnea isn't too bad because I wake myself up when I stop breathing so I don't die or anything. The problem is that I stop breathing about every five minutes. Usually, I have a machine (a CPAP) that constantly blows air in my nose so I won't stop breathing. The machine broke a few days ago and I won't get a new one until at least tomorrow. So basically, I haven't gotten any real sleep for four days now.

Anyway why am I saying this? I don't know. I really want to draw. I have some stuff I started while I was in Canada. But I can't concentrate.

So I have been opposed to the idea of wearing skirts or dresses for a long time. Recently, I decided to experiment with it, though, and now I own several skirts. I also just got a tube dress. But I have a problem. It's strapless, of course, and I don't own a strapless bra (I couldn't find one in my size at the store). I want to wear it tonight, but what do I wear with it? I don't have like little girly jackets or sweaters. And I'm not really trying to dress femininely. I just like the feeling of not wearing pants.

So I've got a wide variety of jackets. I have a hoodie with skulls all over. I've got tons of scarves and button up shirts. I'm wondering what kind of thing people out there would wear with a tube dress.

PS this is the dres: http://www.flickr.com/photos/corynn/4932357773/

So what's the deal with these people who watch you, but they don't leave comments, and they don't have any info on their profile, and don't even have their own avatar? Are they real people? Are they bots, like those Russian bots we used to get on livejournal? Are they shy? Are they the phantom of the opera?

Fuuuuuuuuu.... I was doing pretty well there for a while. I was drawing every day. Now when I try to put pencil to paper it comes out as crap. And I've got a thing I want to do, and it's just not happening.

On another note, will someone explain to me what this adoptables business is all about?

I sometimes freak out and change my hair completely. It has been about a decade since I had the option of doing something really interesting with my hair. The fact that I have that option now meant I had to go with something astoundingly awesome.

http://sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos.....1_840572_n.jpg

[edit]Dammit, can I really not post images in the journal?

This is a meme that I started doing for my characters. It's nice to know these random little things about them. Please run with it if you think it's interesting!

I'm going to do it for Cora today

-Are you a morning or night person?
I used to be a morning person, but I've become a night person since I found out I was a werewolf!
-Which do you prefer, sweet or salty foods?
Sweet foods, definitely. I love bread and cookies and cakes and biscuits!
-Ninja or Pirates?
I think my master was a ninja, so definitely ninja.
-What was your favorite childhoold tv show?
What is this tee vee?
-Do you collect anything?
I really like feathers, especially if they're blue or iridescent
-What’s your favorite animal?
I would have to say birds
-What’s your first thought when you wake up?
Usually to get some water. Sometimes I have a terrible taste in my mouth when I wake up.
-Favorite color?
Sky blue
-Have you ever seen a ghost?
Not yet, but I've heard a lot of stories about them.
-Have any bad habits?
Is it bad to pick your teeth with your claws?
-List your three best personality traits:
I'm very friendly, I like to resolve problems peacefully, and people say I'm sweet.
-Any tattoos or piercings?
Not at all. That sort of thing was forbidden by my people.
-Are you mostly clean or messy?
I try to be very clean. My people said that a clean house was a sign of a healthy spirit.
-If you could live anywhere, where would you go?
In the mountains.
-Name one regret you have:
Never telling my friends back home how much they meant to me.
-What’s your favorite song?
I'm not sure. I like a lot of music. Hymnals are always nice.
-Favorite thing to do on a Saturday night?
Watch the sunset, sit by the fire with friends and tell stories.
-What would be your dream job?
I would like to own a bakery!

...yay I still have a job!

Yah, I didn't say anything about that being up in the air before, but it was. And now that I know I'm going to keep getting paychecks, it's time to spend money like a French whore.

I am working on developing my fursona.

She started out as a mantle dragon (this one to be specific: http://www.furaffinity.net/view/3939189 ) but as she neared adulthood, she discovered that she suffered from a family curse. She's a werewolf. She can't control her transformations and she's usually stuck in an anthro form. That's what I have to work on drawing now. Drawing anthros right is hard.