It only took 9 years, but as of this morning my pageviews here have finally exceeded my pageviews on DA.
Woo! (I don't know why, but I've been watching it slowly creep up for the past few years.)

I have lots of thoughts about lots of things, get the urge to share them and then realize I have no idea what I want to say. This is one of those times.

What's going on with me: Life has been busy. I'm clearing out my commission queue (of one - terribly sorry it's taken so long, Kaoru). I'm relatively surprised that I've been able to get a few commissions this year and am really thankful for it.
I've got a number of half-started projects I need to work on - mostly stuff for conventions. Finished the few things I was doing for MFM. Need to finish the one I started for ArkConsas (is that right? I think that's right). Working on one for Fursquared/The Dragget show. Generally keeping myself busy. I would like to start on one of my papercraft badges soon, too - but that'll that can wait a little bit; probably won't have one for MFM this year.
There are also my two code named projects I need to work on and keep up with: Project Bun and Project Tasty Sponge. Busy busy busy...
I'm noticing I'm getting better at a lot of different things. Practice really helps, and I have been arting three to four days a week for a while now. It's really paying off. -should probably stream more, I know Dragonhead would appreciate it.
Had a week off work at the end of July. It really helped with the burn out and general energy problems. Woo! Didn't get as much as I wanted done that week. Didn't get as much alone time as I had planned for, either. >eh< Such is life.
My watcher counter topped 100 a couple weeks ago: Yay! Thank you, guys!
Generally, I'm doing pretty okay. I still complain about a bunch of things, but >eh< I'm not sure I would be happy if I had nothing to complain about.


Words words words...

I don't know. Lots of stuff going on. You guys are pretty great.
Oh! While I'm thinking about it: Would any of you be interested in my posting more of my WIPs in the scrap section? I haven't really been keeping up with that. And is there anything you guys particuliarly like that I've done that you'd like to see more of? (i.e. inks, papercraft, digital stuff, sketches, certain subject material or characters) Or anything you haven't seen me do but would like to? Any feedback is appreciated.
I've probably rambled enough here. ^_^ Thanks for reading!

It's summer again! Time for the heat and the... well, mostly heat. ^_^ It's kinda hot outside.

As far as summers go, I'm actually in a fairly good mood this year (I usually get pretty mopey around the summer). I have been reminded that my birthday is in a few weeks. I am well past the point in my life where I really celebrate my birthday, but I'm not feeling super mopey or painfully introspective this year, so I'm going the chalk that up as a win. ^_^

I'm doing really well, generally. I've had a few commissions and tips for my art (yay!). I'm trying to finished off that three illustrations set, which will complete my commissions queue. My art's looking a lot more polished. Frankly my skills are reaching he point where I can actually do some of the things I've been enviously eyeing other artists doing for years.

MFM is steadily approaching, and I need to sit down and finish that painting I was doing for it. I've also been poking Felpur (who is kindof a staff artist for the con - not really sure how that works) who does a lot of art of the con in general and the panels he runs to let him know that Kitty and I are still here to help him if he needs/wants it. (I get concerned that he will wait to the last minute and then art so hard that blood begins to seep from his every orifice.)

Also need to finish that firebird pic for ArkConsas (did I spell that right? - I don't know.).

And I need to work on Project Tasty Sponge, the comic I have roped some of my friends into. >_>

Huh. I guess I'm just keeping busy in general, which is a good thing. ^_^ All that and a bunch of just random stuff I do when I can't focus on those other projects.

Anywho! This has been kinda ramble-y. Thanks for sticking with it to the end! And thanks for reading and looking at my art! You're super.

Recently had one of those conversations about how X sites is awful and the only reason people use it is because that's where the people are (critical mass of users). I thought about it, and while there's nothing really wrong about this complaint, is usually comes from people that aren't willing to put in the effort to either a) make the offending site better, or b) make the site's competitors more appealing. Now there's really not a lot most users can do to make a site better (i.e. change UI, administration, formatting, blah, blah, blah), but every user can help improve a site's sense of community. All a user has to do is go out there and view content, fave things they like, watch the content providers they enjoy, comment on stuff, and use the forums.
In the long run, it's the quality of the community that attracts users to a site and defines a site's success. If you want a site to succeed, sometimes you have to put in the effort - a little extra push - to help it get there.

Also: Commissions - I just finished my second paying commission - ever. Woo! And I have a third lined up if I'll just sit down and do the work necessary for it. So, that's a thing, now. And while I expect a few people to go "I didn't know you did commissions" or "It's about time you started doing commissions", I'm going to point out that I've been open for commissions since October of 2014, posted tentative pricing on FA and Weasyl, and have commented about it in multiple journal entries. Just sayin' - it's no big secret. If you're curious about what I can do, look at my galleries. I have accounts on FA, DA, Weasyl, and Sofurry. I post my more adult stuff to my alt account on FA and Inkbunny, and sort of blend everything together on Sofurry.
No changes really: if you want to commission me, just send me a note about what you want and we can talk about if I can do it and how many money dollars are necessary to make it happen.

As always: thank you for reading this - your eyeballs are appreciated.

Thought I'd pop in a tell people what I'm doing (since I'm an incredible narcissist and love talking about myself).
Life is pretty busy, but good. I would like a few more naps, but that's a general constant anyway.

Things I have queued or am working on:
MFM '16 image - the digital painting I started is still intimidating me, but I've made some promising progress on some nouveau/deco style design sketches. Skunks and their tails are still nearly impossible to draw.
ArConsas - I've been working this week on an image for that con - their theme is fairy tales, so I am doing an image from a classic Firebird/Baba Yaga tale. It's coming along pretty well. I'm rather pleased that I seem to be pulling it off, too.
Illustration - a friend has requested I do a few pen and ink illustrations for a story he has started writing. I am currently reading the story (very slowly) but I am getting some good mental images I need to sketch for him to look at.
Meme- I still need to do the draw it again meme. I sat down to work on it a couple weeks ago but I was sputtering really hard. Will come back to this later.
Tasty Sponge - I have gotten together with a couple friends in an attempt to put together a short comic book (hoping to do 8-16 pages). We have met to discuss it a couple times and are still pretty early in the concept phase. I am enjoying it greatly, but am being realistic with my expectations that this may or may not result in a finished product. Keeping my fingers crossed.

Anywho! That's what's up with me. Hope you're doing okay. Feel free to comment about your lives and what's going on with you (I am genuinely curious about most of you). As always: thank you for reading this and your eyes are appreciated!

Welp, I've done it again - I've whipped myself up into an emotional whirlpool of unrequited expectations.

I do this just about every time I submit something I've put a lot of effort into, more often with my personal projects than projects I do for others. If I do something for someone in particular, I am usually quite happy and satisfied if they seem to like it. However, when I do a personal project and post it, I always secretly have this expectation that this submission will be the one one that garners a wave of attention and recognition. This secret expectation is completely unreasonable; I've learned that the only way to garner those things is consistent, quality submissions and patience. But still, every time, the silent expectation is there and every time it leads to a bit of a glum batty when that recognition doesn't show up.

So, every time I do this to myself I have to once again re-evaluate myself and my art.
1) Is the art good enough? - a: what does that matter? It's the best you can do now. It's better than some and worse than others, but it is your best effort.
2) Does it satisfy the intended audience? - a: I didn't do it for anyone in particular, so it is a personal project for myself. Nothing I do for myself is ever going to satisfy me for more than five minutes - I'm a total dick to myself so I should not use that to measure my self worth or the value of my work.
3) What sort of reaction would be sufficient to satisfy my desire for attention? - a: If I am truly honest with myself, despite my hunger for outside validation of my work, no reaction would be sufficient, no number of views/faves/comments satisfying, nothing would quench the thirst of my ego for validation. I find it hard to take and believe compliments, so they will never be satisfying. If anything it would keep me from moving on to the next piece and ultimately stunt my growth as an artist.

So, after throwing my own little pity party about that, and the subsequent pity party for not appreciating the comments and reactions of those that have taken the time to view/fave/comment on the work, I generally pick myself up and get on with things.

The moral of this story: I'm a self-centered ass.

Expect a short comic about this in the future. (Or don't. I am a flake, too.)

As always, thank you for reading my ramblings.

Um. It's April Fools, so in the spirit of the holiday: two dogs walk into a bar. The bartender says "You have to leave, we don't allow dogs in here." The first dog responds "It's not a problem, he's my seeing eye dog." The second dog replies in shock, "But you're supposed to be my seeing eye dog. Wait... I'm a dog?"

Anywho! I've been thinking of merging my two accounts: this one and The Bun. I haven't been terribly active on the Bun so I was thinking of just shutting it down and embracing my occasional dabbling in more adult themes. If you're curious about The Bun, you can always check it out here at  Vidnix

blah blah blah

Words.

I generally keep a rough queue of projects to keep me busy, which I have resolved to bite into this year. And I have generally done a good job paring it down the past couple months.
For those of you that look in my scraps, you'll have notice few uploads of projects that I've had in queue for a while now and am trying to get to - along with and example or two of things to keep me arting while I procrastinate and generally roll around moaning about what a sad sack I am.
There are also a few things in queue that I haven't gotten around to starting, either: like that draw it again meme.
I have no idea where I'm going with the journal. It's just degenerating in to general rambling.
Anywho: I have a queue. I'm working on it and will continue picking at it. Trying to think of a non-bitchy/passive-aggressive way of mentioning a lack of commissions and how great it would be to change that. Yeah, can't think of anything.
Anywho! Thanks for reading this.

One year ago today I posted a Journal about the amazing fact that I had finally exceeded 1000 page views (page visits/whatever) - having something around 1100 at the time. It was notable for the number and also because I had my FA account for about eight years at that point (it's a good thing FA saves that info, because I would never be able to keep track of it) and had only started posting regularly the year before.
I have kept with the somewhat regular posting and as of right now I have reached 2475 page visits. That's pretty neat.
Of course, there are issues with these numbers, and it's really hard to parse them, but it does show that people have liked what they've been seeing enough to see who has been posting it.
And I have a lot more watchers. In July of 2014 I noted that I had reached 17 watchers, and in May of 2015 I had about 50, and now I'm up to 82. >_> I think that's pretty great. And I think the people responsible for that are pretty great too (pssst! That's you!).
Blah blah blah. Numbers. Blah blah.
I don't really know what to take away from this other than the numbers are getting better. This is more of a place holder to take note of where I am and where I've been; keep a record and all.

I suppose I should get back to finishing some of these things I've started, so I can post some more. ^_^ Thanks for reading, your eyeballs are appreciated.

So I saw an artist do one of those "draw it again" memes recently, where they take something they drew a few years ago and do it again and post them side by side to see the changes in their styles and techniques.
I'd like to do this myself, but don't really feel like going back through my gallery and picking something, so I'll ask you guys to do it for me. Pick something for my gallery or scraps that you would like to see me try my hand at again. And since I don't have a definitive style, you can also comment on what style you'd like to see it in or emulate (realistic[-ish], cartoony, someone else's style entirely). I'll pick one of the suggestions from here, weasyl, or sofurry.
And if I don't get any suggestions (which is entirely possible), I'll just carry on with my current backlog - which I'm already trying to winnow down.

EDIT: Well, I wasn't really expecting much response to this. And I certainly wasn't expecting people to want me to draw my character, again. But I will be putting this in my queue of projects. Thank you all for the input!

Well, we're a couple weeks into the New Year, and it doesn't look like I'm going to do one of those neat year in review collages, but I am going to take a minute to look at last year.
Art wise: it was a good year for me. Looks like I posted 121 submissions of sketches, inks, and finished work over the past year (that's 10 items a month - Super improvement over 2014 and before). I did Inktober - which accounts for 31 of those images uploaded, and that was a great exercise. Will probably do it again this year - unless I don't. I experimented a lot and saw a lot of improvement in techniques. I also started the Bun for adult work and as a minor social experiment - and that has sortof stagnated. And my metrics are looking a lot better. I'm getting double digit views on my work (averaging about 20 views, which is a bit jump from 7) and I managed to get over 1000 pageviews in the past year (Thank you for your eyeballs! Your delicious, delicious eyeballs!). I also had my first PAYING commission ever this past year.
But yeah. I know I complain about how I don't get a lot of attention for my art and that no one commissions me, but the reality is that things have really been improving, both me and the eyeball traffic. Also: I've been open for commissions since October of 2014 - seriously: If you want to commission me, send me a note that says something along the lines of "I want to commission you. Please draw/make ______ and tell me how much of the fat cash you want to make that happen." And after I'm done hyperventilating and freaking out over the shock of it all, I'll get back to you.

Yep, it's that time of year again! So Happy Birthday, Everyone!

Okay, so  Animancer posted a journal last month asking for people to submit drawing of their characters to go on a "playdate" with his character (you draw your character, he photo shops his character in interacting with your's - super fun concept).
The premise being he and his character get to meet and interact with new people.
So, after nearly a month of procrastinating, I finally got around to responding to his journal in the proscribed way and this is the result.
I have thoroughly squee-ed.
I would recommend this experience to others.

I think I am going to cry.
For the first time ever, I have just received a payment for a commission.
This might not sound like a huge accomplishment, but allow me to put this into some context.
I have only been engaged in the commission process four times in roughly ten years, that last one before this having been eight years ago. Of those four, I actually completed three. (Given that I was taking my first commissions in my early twenties, when I was admittedly flakier than I am now, I was only requesting payment upon completion of the work - because I was concerned with my own ability to complete the work in a timely fashion.) Of the two I completed back then, I was never actually paid for my work... due to extenuating circumstances. Anyway, I essentially closed commissions for a few years because no one seemed interested and I wasn't making any art.
Last year I reopened for commissions due to reduced hours at my work creating both a realistic and regular time to work on commissions and the financial incentive to take them. And I remain(ed) open for commissions for a year without any apparent interest or response.
As a side note, I have previously donated my work to the charity for auction, but have been unwilling to see what it auctions for after that first time as ... well, auctions are said to be the truest expression of a market with things sell for their actual value - and I was not at all pleased with the value my work was purchased at. But I should really just be happy someone was willing to pay for it.
So, when a friend proposed a commission this past month, I was both willing and interested. And while I never really discussed prices with him (due to our relationship, I would have accepted any payment he felt appropriate) he has paid me a generous (and entirely reasonable amount for 5+ hours of work).
But, yes, I feel validated as an artist that my work is valued. (TT_TT) (Which isn't to say that people don't make me feel valued as an artist with their interest and comments - because I do really appreciate that, too - please don't stop. I should probably stop writing before I put too much of my foot in my mouth.)
Err... Thank you for reading this!

I may have just finished my first commission in years! And this one I'll probably get paid for! Wooo! Even better!
Waiting on a response from the commissioner.

Well, only five days left of inktober - I think I'm going to make it.
This has been a very rewarding experience, but I am looking forward to taking a break and getting back to working on some of these projects I've set up for myself.
I have an actual commission I need to finish (Woo!), I'd like to put some ideas I have for cons down on paper, have some half started/finished items I need to polish off, and a whole list of other things.
^_^ But anywho! I hope you guys have enjoyed the ride. And if you have any suggestions for the last few days, I'd be happy to hear them.
Blah blah blah.
You're all grrrrrrreat! (But hopefully not bran flakes coated in sugar.)

So, we're about a third of the way through the month, and so far I have kept to the inktober challenge: one piece of inked work per day with no set standards as to the complexity or size of the pieces.
Generally these have been taking about an hour and a half to do (give or take depending on the circumstances and the piece - the shortest being yesterday's, which took half an hour as I was rushing to help some friends at their shop; the longest taking two and a half to three hours). It's a good chunk of time to try to find every day and on busy days its been particularly difficult to sit down and draw. And while I like most of the work I've done, some of it has been very simple and not really lived up to my standards/expectations. One of the things that really bothers me is that in my rush to post some of these, I haven't taken or had the time to sit down and write the usual descriptions regarding content, thought process, and whatever regarding each of these. Oh well. Maybe I'll have time later to go back in and edit the descriptions.
Anywho! Let's see how much further I get with this!
On a seperate but related note, I've picked up a bunch of new watchers, which is a treat! Thank you, all!
Any comments/critiques/thoughts/suggestions would be appreciated.

This meme was politely foisted from  Makootter, who politely requested I post this journal without using the word "tag" - you'll see how that works in a second.

Leave a comment below and I will tell you the following things (or make things up randomly if I don't really know much about you):

1. Tell you what animal/creature you remind me of that ISN'T your fursona's species.
2. Tell you what color I think fits you.
3. Tell you how I feel about you.
4. Insult you.
5. Tell you my favorite character of yours. (If you have more than one...)
6. Tell you what season you remind me of.
7. Tell you what you smell like in my head.
8. Think of a random nickname for you.
9. Tell you what element you remind me of.
10. Tell you what weapon I'd equip you with in a fantasy dungeon crawl
11. Assign you a super power and super-hero/villain name.
12. Ask you to put this in your journal without using the word 'tag'

Today is the first day of October, which also happens to be the first day of Inktober (fancy how that works).
If you're curious what Inktober is here is a link that explains it: http://mrjakeparker.com/inktober but it is essentially an artist challenge to do and post a piece of inked artwork once a day for the month of October. It's not an elaborate challenge, and there is not bar set for elaborate works or compositions - it's just an ink a day for a month, big or small, simple or fancy.
I'm pondering whether or not I should participate this year. I'm leaning toward "yes" but I don't know if I can make the commitment.
I guess I'll make up my mind later tonight, when I have the time and the tools in front of me. And if I do it, I'll try not to stress over it or beat myself up if I miss a day or two. Don't want to psyche myself up or out. Be the cucumber.

I've noticed rather a bit more people stopping to say "thank you", recently.
People thanking me for drawing their characters or just for being supportive in general. Maybe it's just my inability to take a compliment, which has caused me to ignore this sort of behavior in the past, or perhaps this is some sort of new and refreshing trend. I don't know.
But it does make me wonder if I have been sufficiently grateful for the people around me. I have a small group of people that seem to enjoy my art: for whom I am particularly grateful. It's been really hard to find an audience for my work - which is mostly my fault, as I don't do a lot of the things that help with that: have a defined style, network, and whatever; so I'm really glad that there are people that enjoy what I do. There are other artists I socialize with and talk to who have been pretty supportive and really nice. I have a few local friends who are super supportive and nice - you guys are great. And there are also people in the local and general community that work hard to make sure good and fun things happen (>cough< Keefur >cough< Draconis >cough< lot of >cough< others >cough cough<). So, to all of you, I just want you to know that you are appreciated and thank you for just being you: generally awesome people.
With a few exceptions, I haven't really named anyone in this post because, well, I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings because I forgot to list them while writing this. But if you're reading this, chances are, I'm talking about you. So, Thank you. You're awesome.

I boot up my computer to check a few things before leaving for MFM and my friend Ed has left this message for me
"‘Twas the night before Con, and amongst all the socks, Not a furry was stirring, not even a fox; The badges were hung by the jacket with care, In hopes that the critters soon would be there; The furries were nestled all snug in their dens; And visions of longtails danced in their heads; Away to the Con I flew like a flash, And there to my wondering eyes did appear, Some art I had done, being worn by a deer."
I like my friend Ed. :)

http://www.mephitfurmeet.org/

Q: Where are you staying?
A: Main Convention Hotel, Whispering Woods

Q: When will you be arriving and leaving?
A: Arriving Thursday, leaving Monday.

Q: Who will you be rooming with?
A: The Hubby. Probably Taryn. Don't know after that.

Q: Where will you be most of the time during the day's?
A: I will try to attend panels this year, but you'll probably find me in the game room or wandering the halls.

Q: What/where will you be eating?
A: Um... around. We usually end up eating at the nearby Danver's a lot.

Q: Will you be having a room party?
A: Nope.

Q: Will you be drinking and/or getting drunk?
A: Possibly? I don't plan on bringing my own, but I might if someone offers.

PERSONAL STUFF:

Q: What is your gender/sexuality?
A: Male/pretty gay.

Q: How tall are you?
A: 5'8" - anyone/anything that says otherwise is wrong.

Q: If I approach you, will you chat with me?
A: Um... Sure. What are we chatting about?

Q: If I see you, how should I get your attention?
A: Pretend I'm completely oblivious, so call out my name and flail your arms in my direct line of sight.

Q: How many furry conventions have you attended?
A: I've been attending MFM for roughly 10 years.

Q: Do you own a fursuit?
A: Nope.

PERMISSIONS:

Q: Can I hug or snuggle with you?
A: Ask first.

Q: How can I find you?
A: Check the game room - there's a good chance I'll be there.

Q: Can I buy you drinks?
A: I cannot stop you, but I don't like beer and vodka is painful, so I make no promises I will drink it.

Q: Can I look in your sketchbook?
A: Probably won't have it with me, but if I do: ask, I probably won't mind.

Q: Can I take your picture?
A: I will complain that I'm fat and don't like the picture.

MISCELLANEOUS:

Q: Do you do do free art, trades, commissions, badges?
A: This is a bad question. Asking four different things with one question:
free art - no. I require your love. Sweet sweet love. Down payments required.
trades - maybe
commissions - no one has commissioned me, yet
badges - see above.

Q: What's your goal for the con this year?
A: My goal is to relax, have fun, and try to attend a few panels this year.

Stealing this from everyone else. Think you guys know most of this or don't actually care.

Basics

Name: Exindiv (Nathan)
Nickname(s): Exin, Ex, teacup bat, tea bat, bat, battie, batbat, meatball with wings
Location: Tennessee, USA
Age: 33
Height: 5' 8" (despite all reports that I'm shorter)
Zodiac Sign: Leo
Pets: Sea monkeys
Favorite thing about yourself: Talking about myself
Worst habit: Talking about myself
Fun fact: I am not dead, so you do not have to worry about me sucking your living essence to continue my undead "life-style"

Identity, Sexuality, & Personality

Gender identity: male
Sexual preference: male(s)
Romantic preference: a good personality
Kinsey Scale score: 5-something
Relationship status: Married
Myers/Briggs test: negative
Hogwarts House: Ravenclaw (I wanted to be a Huufflepuff :( )

Routine

Early Bird or Night Owl: Mid-afternoon gopher (that's a choice, right?)
First thought in the morning: Ten more minutes...
Last thought before falling asleep: I should have gone to bed an hour ago.

School/Work

Do you work or are you a student: Work. It's a thing.
What do you do well: Umm... stuff.
Where do you see yourself in five years: Do I have a time machine? Can I go see myself in five years?

Habits

Do you...
Drink: Occassionally
Smoke: No
Do Drugs: Nope
Have a go-to comfort food: Food - possible choices: Sushi, Tuna salad, noodles, um... whatever I'm craving.
Have a nervous habit: My eye twitches when I'm angry or stressed, does that count?

What is your favorite...

Physical trait in yourself: Um... I'm not ugly?
In Others: You're not ugly.
Mental/emotional quality: Kindness/Patience
Food: >shrug<
Drink: Tea! Mostly Black, but I enjoy herbal, oolong, and a few green teas. Red tea/Roobios is not for me.
Animal: Small Brown Bat
Colors: Blue/Green/Red
Artist/Band/Group: Cure/New Order/Morrissey/The Smiths/Death Cab for Cutie/Semisonic/others...
TV show: Lots of Scifi stuff.... StarTrek, Stargate, Haven, lots of others.
Video game: Disgaea
Favorite Web comic: Gunnerkrigg Court, Dresden Codak, Miamaska, Gon' e-choo, Scary-go-round, Blind Springs...
Fruit: Apples!
Form of relaxation: Loafing
Place: Home

Posting this to get my last depressing post off the front page mostly.

Here are things that have been going on for me: had a birthday last weekend AND got to attend a wedding for a pair of really nice people; still doing lots of sketches and stuff to keep busy; MFM is coming up in a month or so and I'm looking forward to that; I've done a really poor job of keeping up with the BUN but I intend to continue with it.

I've kinda been drawing a bit more adult material than usual which has been interesting. It's forced me to work on anatomy, composition, poses, and expressions - but a chunk of it isn't BUN work and it doesn't really belong on this account, so I'm not really sure what to do with it. I am one of those artists that really likes to show what I'm doing and get feedback on it, so having stuff that doesn't really belong in either of my active accounts is kinda cold and lonesome. I guess this is just one of those things artists have to figure out for themselves.

Anywho! It's generally been a very busy but good couple weeks. Blah blah me me blah.

Thanks for reading.

If you know me and interact with me on a regular basis, you might have noticed I'm a bit more angsty/emotional/whiney/whatever recently. Er... Sorry about that. It's something that happens to a greater or lesser degree every summer. I have a summer birthday and it's always been a time for introspection and reflection - which usually ends up turning sour, where I pick at all the things I haven't really "measured up to". I hope you can bear with me. It usually gets better around August. :|
This year I seem to be focusing on my perceived lack of success with my art by a number of different metrics. I'm actually doing pretty okay with my art: I'm seeing improvement in my style and techniques, broadening my media, working in digital and color more, and doing stuff regularly. Unfortunately, I have this little voice in my head pointing out where I could be doing better: better lighting, more expressive features, dynamic poses and compositions, more color, more exposure, more and regular work.
I have project Bun, which I've been slacking on some for the past month, and it's only two months in. I have been open for commissions for eight months and have had not even a nibble.
There's also the local Con coming up, which is always really great. But it's not looking good for then doing a t-shirt contest this year (which makes me kinda sad, but also glad I did it last year as it is something I've wanted to do for years but kept missing). And there's the auction, too. Ugh, I hurt myself real bad with last year's auction and I've just not gotten over it. Donating again this year, but I'm not going to watch - not making that mistake again.
In non-art related stuff, I've just been having trouble sleeping - bad dreams, restlessness, etc.. There's work, with it's own realm of stresses and troubles. And just stuff.
But anywho! Bear with me, as this too will pass. Life is good, even if my mood doesn't reflect it.
And thanks for reading this.