I've made a lot of mistakes in my life and most of them has drove away people i cared about and called family and now I've got to deal with the consequences. I know i brought this on myself with my actions and I hope that the people I've hurt will read this and hopefully forgive me. I am sorry for everything i have done weather it be me being annoying,over stepping some bounds, begging, or hurting you in some degree. I truly am sorry but as the time has passed i can promise you this i have changed I've matured (at least more then what i was when you met me I'm not perfect and i still have a lot to learn) I have gotten better about my annoying habits but i still see myself doing them from time to time and when that happens please just let me know that i have over stepped my bounds and that I'm annoying you and i will back off. but please if you read this i am truly sorry...i know that saying it sometimes doesn't make up for it and if possible i would love to just sit down and talk things out if you will let me. and i hope you will allow me to. i really do. i want to sit down and talk about things because i know what I've done and i just want to make up for that. i really do. please all i'm asking for is another chance let me prove that i have changed.

Just told my father that im gay he said he already knew and that he would love me no matter what yet how would i face god on judgement day and that i will burn in hell for all eternity. 0.0 ok then? xD

Ok so as of today i have officially decided no more lies I'm going to tell my family that I'm a transgender, Im going to start living life how i want to live and im just going to be me so here is what you need to know about me

Name: Zachary Dean Halle (Zach for short)
Age:I am 21 Years old
Sex:I am a male trapped in a women's body
Height:5'9''
Weight:???
Hair:Brown shaggy Hair
Eyes:Blue
Hobbys: Reading,writing,going to conventions,hanging out with friends,watching anime,playing games, and yes im also a Furry My Fursona Is Forsaken Wulf
Politics:Moderate
Attitude:Just depends on how my day is going but im mostly laid back and fun to be around
Mistakes: I've lied to all the people ive ever cared about for Six years,almost lost the one person i truly loved but as i was forced to tell the truth i felt like a weight had been lifted off my chest and i have lost so many people because of this but i didnt lose the one i loved and im thankful for that everyday. I also have lost friends do to jealousy anger and because of my lies.
Issues: First i suck at grammar (dont expect this post to be in anyway perfect lol) and math, I can be annoying, I have a hard time with money (getting better at it) I have to kind of heart. Jelousy and anger.
Pros:I have a kind heart (its a double edge sword) Im loyal, Once your my friend your my friend (unless you do something that is just unforgivable)
Now to any of my old friends that see this i want you to know this
One- I truly love her this isn't a game! It never was i just couldn't come out and say the truth! I didn't know how, nor could i except it at the time.
Two- I'm sorry that i've lied and hurt you in someway
Three: I'm human i've made mistakes and i am truly sorry for them
Four: I'm hopeing that one day we can all be friends again....
Five: I'm honestly tired of hiding this from everyone, and im so tired ive losing friends because of how things are
And finally Six: I want to be friends with everyone again isnt there anyway for us to be friends?

I just want to say im confused....i thought i had made a family with the people i lived with and hung out with all the time.....i thought we where close...but i must have been wrong...there has to be something wrong with me if i cant even keep one friend. i mean everyone has the problems and i know i probably have a fuck ton of them but why is it that people keep turning there backs on me? if you know the answer please tell me

Ive just had an incredible two days and i have finally got some good news and things are looking up for me and my baby girl and i just hope and prey nothing happens to get rid of this hope and happiness ^^

Sorry about that...Just come to realize that a lot of people have turned there backs on me and i really dont know why and i was really upset. But i am going to say this again i hate false friends and false people if you dont like me just come out and say it. Its that simple and ill leave you alone. But anyway sorry again

Ok seriously what the fuck people are all furries typical backstabbing assholes that pretend to be your friends then turn around and say they hate you? wtf i mean i know i can be annoying and i know that I've fucked up in the past but to me my thought process is my friends are my family i thought we where family but it just goes to prove that no matter high kind you are or how much you worry about someone or how much you cried because you didn't want to leave but had to who balled there eyes out multiple times because of issues that where going on. I did nothing to deserve any of this treatment and i find it to be utter bullshit because like i said i know i fucked up in my past but i tried to make up for it and you still do this shit then you obviously never like me to begin with so next time TELL ME THE FUCKING TRUTH IF YOU DONT LIKE ME DONT PRETEND TO BE MY FUCKING FRIEND!!!!!

If you read this and get pissed off i dont fucking care. -___-

Hey guys I made a facebook come add me name is saithren wulf (my alt charecter) please add me so I can have some friends! ^^

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO IM 21 BRING ON THE PARTY AND THE BOOOOZE! xD

You hear me thats right go check him out and and try to win an amazing peice of art of you and your sweetheart!

http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/5253874/

k;jgfkjdsnfjbenflkdsnfkndsljfvndslkjfnkfjsvninsdfjvwedfsnv
orejngfvpiksdljNV;oddskjfvk;djnvldwsnfkjaskdmioqAESN
FCKNSFJBVNSWKDNGVODSKLNFJDSFNVIODGVOIKDFSNG;DFKM

That is all xDD

Sorry if you read this but i need to vent a little bit so please tell me why i move out of my house to go live with my friends to be happy and it was awesome but just a night ago i came back home because of being homesick so I'm staying up here you know till my friends get back from RF and everything was fine go to bed wake up and got a fucking shit storm hit me got yelled at for sleeping on the couch...(when I really don't have anywhere else to sleep unless you want the floor) then go to see all the mail i missed and this is what really pissed me off I had a 698 bill to pay to the hospital did they tell me no! to make it worse my deadline to pay it was yesterday so now the bill got bumped up idk how much cause it went to collections and im sitting here pissed off and going
WHAT THE FUCK!!! -____-


Sorry for the vent....

Thats right you heard me go check out  virtyalfobo and ask him about his templates there awesome and i cant wait to use mine! :3

Hey check this guy out he's holding a YCH raffle! thats right free!! go and enter!

http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/5017115/
http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/5017115/
http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/5017115/

Haven't posted a new journal for a while but i don't really know what to say but i guess i can put what ive been up too recently
Well lets see during the day I'm usually sitting and relaxing with the love of my life either playing a game or watching something on Netflix with a few visits to the living room to talk to Nekari and Fortune
Then during the midday i take a shower and start getting ready for work
Night rolls around and i'm off to Rally's working till closing witch is 6 am in the morning >< TwT not fun at all but its a job and i'm making money where i can spend it on things i want and need and to buy things for the love of my life

AND that is it sad really....Note to self DO MORE THINGS lol

I'm just writing this journal to let the few people i love and care about most in this world to know how special they are to me you guys are my family and we've been through a lot together and yet here we are still standing side by side through everything and just like any family i know we fight bicker and sometimes want to kill each other for how badly we each get on each others nerves and lately i know things have been tough were going through a lot of changes and sadly it seems as if now and days where not a family....we seem to be drifting apart and i really cant take much more im at my limit.....there are some times when we act normal laughing and cutting up like we always do then the moment passes and there's a brick wall there in its place....its sad to say...but if your guys are reading this....please let us go back to being normal and if there's anything that's bothering you anything at all please just let me know what it is so we can go back to being our happily little family.....you guys are all i have and i just want to know if were still that way....if not i don't know what I'm going to do....

Check this link out if you want to get a heart warming photo with your loved one! :3

http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/4876409/
http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/4876409/
http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/4876409/

Look guys I do not want any drama in my life i have too much already so please dont start it with me or cause any drama for me to be involved with, i came to this sight to have fun and be in the fandom to have fun not to have more drama in my life so please dont please?

Yeah you heard me sex toys! A new toy maker is in town and they're holding a raffle to win a free version of their Kaiju model! Looks very sexy and sleek! Want to enter this raffle? Check them out then!

https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/4759063/
https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/4759063/
https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/4759063/

Check it out!!!!!!! try and win a pic with the totter!!!!!!!
http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/4763966/
http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/4763966/
http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/4763966/
http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/4763966/

Im on the verg of losing the one thing i truly love and i dont know what to do i dont want to lose her i love her with all of my heart she means the world to me and i cant imagen a life with out her i cant live with out her she is my light with out her i wouldnt Even know what to do....i would just be a walking shadow an empty vessal walking around.....what can i do to get you back what can i do for you to love me again....what do i do..

Right now im going to be posting little by little of what i write and when i do post if it cuts off ot doesnt mean im done with that chapter thats just what ive come up with so far so plz for thoes of you who read it and like it plz be patient and ill get things done asap

What did I do that was so wrong?
When all I wanted was for you to stay strong
I sit here wondering
Just what is it that im doing?
For I dont know what I did that was so wrong
When all I wanted was for you to stay strong
I know I get mad and easly depressed
I dont mean to take it out on you
And when I do i dont mean it
For when I do I feel as if im the worst thing there is
But tell me what was it that i did that was so wrong
When all I wanted was for you to stay strong
For you to stay here in my arms and never leave
Yet there you go away from me
Plz tell me what I did that was so wrong
When all I wanted was for you to stay strong and here in my arms.

Poem ©  forsakenwulf

I know this one doesnt have a happy ending and not my best and is still a wip but this is what i have so far let me know what you think.

There was a time
and a place
where all of this pain
showed its face
sitting here in these chains made me feel
as if i was lost in space
so empty and hollow
with no where to go
when i was at my low
something walked into my cage
smiling at me
and i felt as free as i could be
no longer alone in these chains of mine
for i finaly had someone at my side.

Poem ©  forsakenwulf

I was lost and confused
Didnt know what to do
the i saw you and relized
your the reason I am alive.

A little poem that came to my mind and i thought i would post it, it has a lot of meaning for me and i hope you like it.

Ps. this is for you baby girl :3  Razzyraccoon

poem belongs to me  forsakenwulf