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Important life changes
Posted 8 months agoHey guys, or anyone who reads this..
I hardly ever make journals but I feel this warrants it. And I feel I need to get this off my chest and get folks up to speed.
I broke up with my partner
insanesniper during new years.
I won't go into details on what happened, mainly because even I don't know WHY it had to happen either.
Short story is that Balor began distancing himself from me more and more for the past two years.
He always had a reason to why he wouldn't spend time or why we had to cancel events, meet ups or even just spending time together. I didn't suspect anything for a long time, shit happens in life.
The worst of it came when he cancelled attending Eurofurence28 with me and our friends in the last minute.
The reason he gave was that he suffered a serious traffic accident and was in the hospital. I still went to EF28 but I was worried sick through the whole con. He kept ignoring me even though I was worried sick about him and desperate to visit him in the hospital.
It kept going on. I gave him till New Years to talk to me, to patch up our dying relationship. He ignored it >_>
I would have been fine with just leaving there but there was another thing. My friends brought to my attention that he lied about being in that accident.
Everything else I could have forgiven but that... That hurt. That hurt me more then anything else in my entire life.
After 15 years of having my full faith in him.. shouldering all burden and risk for finding a way for us to be finally together after being in a long distance relationship for so long.. the fact that I was being lied to and manipulated in such a petty, cruel way... it broke me. I value honesty above all else and this is just something I could never forgive.
Not like it matters. He haven't responded to me since New Years. I understand now that I am dead to him, therefore he is dead to me.
I'm quite sure he left the fandom as well, I wasn't the only one of our furry friend he was ghosting.
On a brighter side, I think I have finally been able to put all that behind me.
Those 15 years contained some of the best memories of my life and now are tied to someone I can barely re-contextualize now.
It's going to leave a big nasty scar on me but I'm finally ready to move on.
I want to thank all of my precious friends that were there for me in these trying months. I know I haven't been pleasant to be around but I will try to make it up to all of you. You mean the world to me.
I don't know how I would have been able to continue without the support and love of this community.
Speaking of, I know I haven't been uploading much in a while. That is going to change. I have a backlog of art to share and new commissions are getting finished soon ^_^
And don't worry about me, I'm quite happy right now ^^ Met some amazing folks, including a very special dragon recently, and I'm planning visits throughout the year. Maybe NFC next year ^_^
I'm quite cheerful, honesty <3
And I don't know if this needs to be said as I think it should be obvious: Please don't harass Balor. I don't care anymore why he did what he did, and him being out of the furry community means he is out of my life for good. Don't drag up old wounds.
I'm going to leave up old art of him with me because, well, it's part of my history whether I like to think about it or not. It was mostly me who paid for them anyway and people enjoy them ^_^
I made a new telegram sticker pack with only my characters in it. It will be the one I'll continue updating so if anyone was using the megapack you can grab it from here: https://t.me/addstickers/FreeClaw
I hardly ever make journals but I feel this warrants it. And I feel I need to get this off my chest and get folks up to speed.
I broke up with my partner
insanesniper during new years.I won't go into details on what happened, mainly because even I don't know WHY it had to happen either.
Short story is that Balor began distancing himself from me more and more for the past two years.
He always had a reason to why he wouldn't spend time or why we had to cancel events, meet ups or even just spending time together. I didn't suspect anything for a long time, shit happens in life.
The worst of it came when he cancelled attending Eurofurence28 with me and our friends in the last minute.
The reason he gave was that he suffered a serious traffic accident and was in the hospital. I still went to EF28 but I was worried sick through the whole con. He kept ignoring me even though I was worried sick about him and desperate to visit him in the hospital.
It kept going on. I gave him till New Years to talk to me, to patch up our dying relationship. He ignored it >_>
I would have been fine with just leaving there but there was another thing. My friends brought to my attention that he lied about being in that accident.
Everything else I could have forgiven but that... That hurt. That hurt me more then anything else in my entire life.
After 15 years of having my full faith in him.. shouldering all burden and risk for finding a way for us to be finally together after being in a long distance relationship for so long.. the fact that I was being lied to and manipulated in such a petty, cruel way... it broke me. I value honesty above all else and this is just something I could never forgive.
Not like it matters. He haven't responded to me since New Years. I understand now that I am dead to him, therefore he is dead to me.
I'm quite sure he left the fandom as well, I wasn't the only one of our furry friend he was ghosting.
On a brighter side, I think I have finally been able to put all that behind me.
Those 15 years contained some of the best memories of my life and now are tied to someone I can barely re-contextualize now.
It's going to leave a big nasty scar on me but I'm finally ready to move on.
I want to thank all of my precious friends that were there for me in these trying months. I know I haven't been pleasant to be around but I will try to make it up to all of you. You mean the world to me.
I don't know how I would have been able to continue without the support and love of this community.
Speaking of, I know I haven't been uploading much in a while. That is going to change. I have a backlog of art to share and new commissions are getting finished soon ^_^
And don't worry about me, I'm quite happy right now ^^ Met some amazing folks, including a very special dragon recently, and I'm planning visits throughout the year. Maybe NFC next year ^_^
I'm quite cheerful, honesty <3
And I don't know if this needs to be said as I think it should be obvious: Please don't harass Balor. I don't care anymore why he did what he did, and him being out of the furry community means he is out of my life for good. Don't drag up old wounds.
I'm going to leave up old art of him with me because, well, it's part of my history whether I like to think about it or not. It was mostly me who paid for them anyway and people enjoy them ^_^
I made a new telegram sticker pack with only my characters in it. It will be the one I'll continue updating so if anyone was using the megapack you can grab it from here: https://t.me/addstickers/FreeClaw
2025
Posted 10 months agoI'll try visiting more friends this year.
2019 plans
Posted 7 years agoPlanning to finally move to Finland to be closer to InsaneSniper
Sadly this means I won't be going to be any conventions next year, as I'm fully concentrating on the move and finding a job. Will be stressful enough as is ^_^
InsaneSniperSadly this means I won't be going to be any conventions next year, as I'm fully concentrating on the move and finding a job. Will be stressful enough as is ^_^
SEG's Free Art Raffle
Posted 7 years agoI would like to signal boost for the artist who designed and drew my dragon, 
SEGartworks !
She's holding a free raffle right now, with three possible winners, so please watch her if you haven't already, she has an awesome art style ^_^
The journal to her raffle is here: https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/8789468/
SEGartworks !She's holding a free raffle right now, with three possible winners, so please watch her if you haven't already, she has an awesome art style ^_^
The journal to her raffle is here: https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/8789468/
Cfz 2018
Posted 7 years agoOnce again, me and are at Confuzzled ^_^
are at Confuzzled ^_^Cfz 2017
Posted 9 years agoJust a quick journal to note that me and are registered and will be attending Confuzzled next year! :D
are registered and will be attending Confuzzled next year! :DEF22 recap and raffle promotion
Posted 9 years agoSo, Eurofurence ended on Monday for me and
As we headed home I had one thought on my mind:
This con was AWESOME and I want to go again :D
This was our second time visiting Eurofurence and it was such a magnificent experience! Unlike last year everything seemed to have gone right, our planes were on time, we were relaxed, adventurous and social, made many new friends and I came home without any sign of the dreaded con crud :D
We met many old friends, while also made cool new friends..
We attended fun events like Uncle Kage's Storyhour, and Balor almost won the retro game tournament..
We held small roomparties among friends, playing couch multiplayer games on my laptop connected to the TV...
We ate delicious sushi, burgers and kebab among friends...
We saw many good art in the art show, especially many dragon related art and sculptures I would have loved to take home...
We picked up cool furry junk at the dealers den while also meeting our favorite artists there, getting art and giving them delicious Finnish candy (I'm so sorry Taz! xD)
The only downside is that time seemed to have sped past us so fast, it feels like we missed so much of the events and panels and did not even have time to explore Berlin this time... But spending so much time among friends and experiencing new things, it made up for not having a plan and just going with the flow :D
It was such an overall great experience that I feel bad for not attending next year :(
However we've been planning to go to Confuzzled as a change of scenery!
So for all our friends who attend Cfz, we'll see you there next year! For everyone we met at EF, don't worry, we'll see each other again as this won't be our last Eurofurence, we're eager to revisit the con in the future ^_^
Also for anyone who managed to read my babbling this far, I urge you to check out SEGartworks
She is holding a raffle for free art at http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/7774463/ , and she's been responsible for some of my awesome sfw art like this this and this!
Her art is awesome and has a great style, give her a watch! Thanks ^_^
As we headed home I had one thought on my mind:
This con was AWESOME and I want to go again :D
This was our second time visiting Eurofurence and it was such a magnificent experience! Unlike last year everything seemed to have gone right, our planes were on time, we were relaxed, adventurous and social, made many new friends and I came home without any sign of the dreaded con crud :D
We met many old friends, while also made cool new friends..
We attended fun events like Uncle Kage's Storyhour, and Balor almost won the retro game tournament..
We held small roomparties among friends, playing couch multiplayer games on my laptop connected to the TV...
We ate delicious sushi, burgers and kebab among friends...
We saw many good art in the art show, especially many dragon related art and sculptures I would have loved to take home...
We picked up cool furry junk at the dealers den while also meeting our favorite artists there, getting art and giving them delicious Finnish candy (I'm so sorry Taz! xD)
The only downside is that time seemed to have sped past us so fast, it feels like we missed so much of the events and panels and did not even have time to explore Berlin this time... But spending so much time among friends and experiencing new things, it made up for not having a plan and just going with the flow :D
It was such an overall great experience that I feel bad for not attending next year :(
However we've been planning to go to Confuzzled as a change of scenery!
So for all our friends who attend Cfz, we'll see you there next year! For everyone we met at EF, don't worry, we'll see each other again as this won't be our last Eurofurence, we're eager to revisit the con in the future ^_^
Also for anyone who managed to read my babbling this far, I urge you to check out
SEGartworksShe is holding a raffle for free art at http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/7774463/ , and she's been responsible for some of my awesome sfw art like this this and this!
Her art is awesome and has a great style, give her a watch! Thanks ^_^
EF22 meme
Posted 9 years agoNot long till it's EF time!
This is the second con for me, figured I'll do this meme thing everyone loves filling out.
Where are you staying?
At the Estrel Hotel
Means of transportation?
Coming by plane from Hungary, this year me and Balor will arrive seperately.
Sharing a room with:
With my sweet lion
What is your gender?
Male
Relationship Status:
In an open and loving relationship with
How old are you?
31
How tall are you?
I'm a very tall werewolf, possibly the tallest at the con?
You'll know me when you see me :P
What names can I call you?
FreeClaw, Free, or just call me wolfy :3
Which languages do you speak?
English and Hungarian mainly.
I understand a little Finnish, but not enough to start a conversation with.
Where will you be most of the time during the day?
Probably around the hotel lobby, hanging out with friends.
Who will you be with?
Will be stuck to like glue :D
I'll also be hanging out with these cute guys:
Do you do free art?
Sadly I'm not an artist :/
Do you do trades?
Nope.
Do you do commissions?
Nope.
Do you have prints/ CDs?
Nope, still not an artist.
What suit(s) will you have?
I don't fursuit (yet?)
Can I dance with you?
I'm a big clumsy derp and will stay away from the dance floor (unless properly intoxicated)
Can I touch you?
If I know you, uh, sure? o_O
Can I talk to you?
Sure, always happy to talk to people ^_^
Can I hug you?
If I know you then sure!
Otherwise... maybe. Just ask first :3
Can I snuggle with you?
Yeah definately ask first for this one!
Can I give you lots of money?
Uhhh, no thanks, I think I'll be fine.
Can we hang out?
Sure, as long as I'm not already busy with friends.
Can I take photos of you/with you?
*hides*
Can I buy you lots of drinks?
Well, if I'm in the mood, sure.
Do you drink Alcohol/Smoke?
I'm not a fan of alchohol to be honest, and if I do drink it's mostly cider or radler beers.
I really, really dislike smoke however and I will try to stay away from the smell as best I can.
Are you nice?
I hope I am!
Other cons you may go to?
Haven't been to any other beside EF yet, but me and Balor are planning to visit Confuzzled next year.
Attending any events?
Propably, but not sure which ones yet. Will decide when I'm at the con most likely.
How can I find you at the con?
Look for the tallest fur around who is trying his hardest to go unnoticed and you'll find me :P
Or just contact me on telegram ^_^
Can we go out for a dinner?
Going to be eating with friends most likely. But you're welcome to join and suggest a place if we know you!
Are you buying art?
I'll probably just pick up one or two knick knacks from the dealers den and snag a sketch commission if I can.
Budget says I can't afford a lot of stuff this time :/
What do I have to watch out for when I am meeting you?
I'm a bit awkward when meeting new people so I guess the best you can do is initiate more.
I'm very nice and chatty once I open up tho!
What is the best way to contact you?
Telegram is the easiest way to contact me during the con, just poke me @ FreeClaw
May I kidnap you to my room?
Did Balor put you up to it?? If so then sure :P
You look pretty tired, are you ok?
Sadly the greymuzzle is showing and I am not used to being active long into the night.
Last time/last con/last meet/last chat we talked so much and now you forgot my name? Why???
My memory always have been terrible, especially with names and even faces :(
Just jolt my memory and it will come back to me!
Will you tell me your room-number and can I surprise visit you?
Noooo my room is my one little safe haven from the chaos of the con!
Anyway if I know you well enough chances are you'll know my room number, and if you don't, just ask!
I have a personal question for the convention. May I ask you that?
Feel free to ask, I'll try to answer if I can.
This is the second con for me, figured I'll do this meme thing everyone loves filling out.
Where are you staying?
At the Estrel Hotel
Means of transportation?
Coming by plane from Hungary, this year me and Balor will arrive seperately.
Sharing a room with:
With my sweet lion
What is your gender?
Male
Relationship Status:
In an open and loving relationship with
How old are you?
31
How tall are you?
I'm a very tall werewolf, possibly the tallest at the con?
You'll know me when you see me :P
What names can I call you?
FreeClaw, Free, or just call me wolfy :3
Which languages do you speak?
English and Hungarian mainly.
I understand a little Finnish, but not enough to start a conversation with.
Where will you be most of the time during the day?
Probably around the hotel lobby, hanging out with friends.
Who will you be with?
Will be stuck to
like glue :DI'll also be hanging out with these cute guys:
Do you do free art?
Sadly I'm not an artist :/
Do you do trades?
Nope.
Do you do commissions?
Nope.
Do you have prints/ CDs?
Nope, still not an artist.
What suit(s) will you have?
I don't fursuit (yet?)
Can I dance with you?
I'm a big clumsy derp and will stay away from the dance floor (unless properly intoxicated)
Can I touch you?
If I know you, uh, sure? o_O
Can I talk to you?
Sure, always happy to talk to people ^_^
Can I hug you?
If I know you then sure!
Otherwise... maybe. Just ask first :3
Can I snuggle with you?
Yeah definately ask first for this one!
Can I give you lots of money?
Uhhh, no thanks, I think I'll be fine.
Can we hang out?
Sure, as long as I'm not already busy with friends.
Can I take photos of you/with you?
*hides*
Can I buy you lots of drinks?
Well, if I'm in the mood, sure.
Do you drink Alcohol/Smoke?
I'm not a fan of alchohol to be honest, and if I do drink it's mostly cider or radler beers.
I really, really dislike smoke however and I will try to stay away from the smell as best I can.
Are you nice?
I hope I am!
Other cons you may go to?
Haven't been to any other beside EF yet, but me and Balor are planning to visit Confuzzled next year.
Attending any events?
Propably, but not sure which ones yet. Will decide when I'm at the con most likely.
How can I find you at the con?
Look for the tallest fur around who is trying his hardest to go unnoticed and you'll find me :P
Or just contact me on telegram ^_^
Can we go out for a dinner?
Going to be eating with friends most likely. But you're welcome to join and suggest a place if we know you!
Are you buying art?
I'll probably just pick up one or two knick knacks from the dealers den and snag a sketch commission if I can.
Budget says I can't afford a lot of stuff this time :/
What do I have to watch out for when I am meeting you?
I'm a bit awkward when meeting new people so I guess the best you can do is initiate more.
I'm very nice and chatty once I open up tho!
What is the best way to contact you?
Telegram is the easiest way to contact me during the con, just poke me @ FreeClaw
May I kidnap you to my room?
Did Balor put you up to it?? If so then sure :P
You look pretty tired, are you ok?
Sadly the greymuzzle is showing and I am not used to being active long into the night.
Last time/last con/last meet/last chat we talked so much and now you forgot my name? Why???
My memory always have been terrible, especially with names and even faces :(
Just jolt my memory and it will come back to me!
Will you tell me your room-number and can I surprise visit you?
Noooo my room is my one little safe haven from the chaos of the con!
Anyway if I know you well enough chances are you'll know my room number, and if you don't, just ask!
I have a personal question for the convention. May I ask you that?
Feel free to ask, I'll try to answer if I can.
F-List
Posted 9 years agoI've been poked about it several times over the years, so I finally made an account on F-List:
https://www.f-list.net/c/freeclaw
Feel free to look it up for a reference on my characters kinks ^_^
I don't roleplay much nowadays, so I'm not planning to visit that site a lot.
Besides, I much prefer telegram for that :P
https://www.f-list.net/c/freeclaw
Feel free to look it up for a reference on my characters kinks ^_^
I don't roleplay much nowadays, so I'm not planning to visit that site a lot.
Besides, I much prefer telegram for that :P
Quality artist open for commissions with affordable prices
Posted 9 years agoJust wanted to do a shout out for one of my favorite artists, she has a really nice style and recently lowered her prices, and I think her art is a very, very good value for what she is asking!
But don't just take my word for it, check out these cool pieces I got from her over the past year:
http://www.furaffinity.net/view/20206387/
http://www.furaffinity.net/view/19163959/
http://www.furaffinity.net/view/18393355/
So please, place some eyeballs on the gallery of SEGartworks !
Thanks ^_^
But don't just take my word for it, check out these cool pieces I got from her over the past year:
http://www.furaffinity.net/view/20206387/
http://www.furaffinity.net/view/19163959/
http://www.furaffinity.net/view/18393355/
So please, place some eyeballs on the gallery of
SEGartworks !Thanks ^_^
FurryNetwork
Posted 9 years agoSo, I've had a FurryNetwork account for a while now, but I haven't really kept it up to date like Furaffinity...
This changes now.
I've uploaded all my current art there and will be keeping it updated, as well as follow artists and friends there.
This is not saying that I will abandon FA any time soon. As much as a sinking ship it had been for the past years it still has the most members and visibility.
So I will keep being active on both sites for the time being.
My page if you would like to follow me on FN: https://beta.furrynetwork.com/freeclaw/
This changes now.
I've uploaded all my current art there and will be keeping it updated, as well as follow artists and friends there.
This is not saying that I will abandon FA any time soon. As much as a sinking ship it had been for the past years it still has the most members and visibility.
So I will keep being active on both sites for the time being.
My page if you would like to follow me on FN: https://beta.furrynetwork.com/freeclaw/
Thank you everyone
Posted 9 years agoJust wanted to do a quick shout to thank all my friends and watchers who followed me on FA so far.
I appreciate each and every one of you and I hope you enjoy my art ♥
I appreciate each and every one of you and I hope you enjoy my art ♥
EF22 :D
Posted 10 years agoAaand registration to Eurofurence 22 is done!
If you're going, be sure to meet me and there ^_^
If you're going, be sure to meet me and
there ^_^106YCH raffle by alexanderjfragkos
Posted 10 years ago
alexanderjfragkos is holding a raffle for an upcoming orgy picture including a huge number of characters :oCheck out the details of the YCH here http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/7232123/
And you can enter by commenting in his journal here: http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/7244752/
Cleared journal notifications
Posted 10 years agoWow. Finally read through half a year of journals and cleared the over three years worth of notifications I had built up.
Seems I've missed out on interesting stuff and events :(
Terribly sorry to my friends as due to depression and anxiety issues I haven't been reading any of their journals during that time except those that were directly pointed out to me.
But I will keep up to date on them from this point on :3
Seems I've missed out on interesting stuff and events :(
Terribly sorry to my friends as due to depression and anxiety issues I haven't been reading any of their journals during that time except those that were directly pointed out to me.
But I will keep up to date on them from this point on :3
EF21
Posted 10 years agoWell, this thing actually happened.
Attended my first convention ever and it has been a blast!
Me and insanesniper had such a fantastic time that we will plan to attend EF22 next year as well ^_^
We were finally able to meet long time friends like draconigen Vinaru SiGe 
Seti and we met new awesome people along the way! You are all fantastic and we hope to see you again next year!
And as for my long neglected furaffinity page... I'll try to be more active now I suppose :3
Attended my first convention ever and it has been a blast!
Me and
insanesniper had such a fantastic time that we will plan to attend EF22 next year as well ^_^We were finally able to meet long time friends like
draconigen Vinaru SiGe 
Seti and we met new awesome people along the way! You are all fantastic and we hope to see you again next year!And as for my long neglected furaffinity page... I'll try to be more active now I suppose :3
Free art varenvel raffle
Posted 12 years ago
varenvel is having a free art raffle, check it out: http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/4367657/