but i have finally found out how to log in to my account again.


which means

i have commissions open once again.

although i have a new paypal and fee thingy set up. so any transactions will be discussed in messaged


so yea. back after several years yay :D

so I got my laptop cable. yay.

now the bad news.

my boyfriend and father got into a domestic dispute and got arrested.
both of them.

NOW I have no internet. because my dads not allowed on the property and took the router with him when I got to come back the 1 time he could and get stuff.

so now I have no internet. im on a friends computer right now. so yea that happened.

when I get the money to pay off our overdue internet bill "$324" ill have internet again.

so weee. this adventure never ends.

so guy who have commissions from me, my laptop charger cable broke. i'm on my chromebook right now.


only thing i can do on it is get on the internet. chromebooks fuckin suck.


anyway i ordered a new charger cable it should be here soon. so hopefully i can draw again soon!!! yayyyyyy


till then ill just be talkin to people on here. sorry for the inconvenience. :C

no.



but i am 21 now. officially. today.


so yay.

just bought my first legal 6 pack. of new castle.


was gonna get colt 45 for shits and gigs. but i didnt.


maybe thinking i should have xD

The Auction only has 2 more days on it and so far no bids D:

I'm really trying to raise this money so i can have some kind of a party for my 21st birthday. :/

you guys can bid anything at this point if you want lol

Hopefully i'll at least make enough to buy a birthday cake. cause i really want one xD
[Goal reached!! Now its just extra for more food, drinks, possibly party streamers xD]

Alcohol will probably be a if i somehow have extra money thing. priority is trying to get food for people so they'll want to spend time with me on wednesday.


if i do manage to get some money and get to have some kind of party thing i will take pics n junk and post a link to an album with em on here after or the next day. :DD

SO i havent posted anything in a while and im trying my best still to get to a position i actually can again.

I did have a little problem... My harddrive got wiped when i reinstalled windows. It kept crashing and yeaaaa.

BUT i know i have the pics on it still. i just have to find them again.


ANYWAYS I have an Auction up right now to raise money for my birthday party :D

I'm going to be 21 :3 wooooo!

Also i've decided im not gonna bitch about the bad shit in my life in these journals anymore. Nothing but sunshine and love stuff and Happy shit.

yup. Mask of Ecstasy. :3

SO IM JUST GONNA GIVE A QUICK UPDATE RECAP CAUSE ITS A SHITTON TO EXPLAIN AND I DONT FEEL LIKE IT ON A RAINY DAY.


my mom came home. she's delerious and wont let me sleep. [she was yelling just this morning about my dead friend being in the living room, that she came down from "heaven"]

she also blew all her money so we barely made the bills this month.

i cant afford to go to the doctor to get my meds again cause its 100 bucks just to visit he bitch.

my court date have been continues for the last time to be in april. hurray....

adam still hasnt got a job. but its ok we dont have a car so that makes sense...

i cant get a job cause GEE WHIZ I DONT HAVE A GED OR DIPLOMA.

yay for fucking up my life cause i dropped out when my best friend killed herself.

ugh....

still doing everyones art. its just hard with having a fuckin 24 hour job of taking care of my fuckhead mother.

so yea...


HOW IS EVERYONE ELSE DOING?? ill respond and check when i can i promise <333 soon il be able to upload a fuckton of art. sp prepare for a flood of art sometime soon.

seriously.... its the best....

not knowing if today is going to be the day the electricity gets cut off... not knowing if today is the day i get to eat... fucking fun...


still dont have internet... still walking to the gambling place to get on here... still doesnt have wifi so i cant use my own laptop... so i still cant post pics...

sound like anything new...? yea didnt think so... thats cause its not new.. its the same shit thats been happening for the last.... 2 months.... maybe longer.... i dont remember anymore... i stopped keeping track....

still no paying job... still no car... cant get car without money for insurance.... cant get job without transportation...

im gonna walk home and bundle up and try to sleep....

maybe ill be on here later if when i wake up this place is still open... maybe i wont be... im sick of walking in the cold...

im working on all the art that people have bought from me as best i can.

but i cant upload any of it cause my worthless sack of shit i have to call "father" wont even drive me to a fucking mcdonalds for some wifi to have a place to upload.

i have to keep getting on from this old ass computer in this public... whatever you wanna call it.

gambling place, internet cafe, whatever. it sucks.


the second i get to post some art you guys are gonna have an influx.


on that note. i got laid off from gamestop so this is now my only source of income.

hopefully i can get a more steady way of getting art to people, or even finding a way to do stream sales or something. cause lord knows my father isnt gonna pay for shit.

and hes bitching at me about the 300 dollar gas bill? when he hasnt given me a god damn cent since he moved in? freeloading piece of fucking trash.


sorry got kinda mad there.

TL;DR im drawing shit, ill post shit when i have the capability, after im caught up plz buy more art from me so i can pay to live cause my douchefuck freeloading ass of a "father" cant help.

cause i need one. like woah. :3


if you wanna be related to this craycray hybrid of weird, comment and let me know what ya wanna be <3

This person has helped me everytime ive needed it.


and i owe them my life basically at this point.

they've bought art and not complained about my situation and the fact its taken as long as it has.

they straight sent me money to help me in my time of need.

ive never met such a generous person. never.


thank you  keldrin

you are forever a dear friend to me. <3

still cant pay bills.

at a friends for internet.

cant get another job.

life fucking sucks.

/life




jk.

seriously though now i cant even get my meds. withdrawl make me super suicidal. and anxious.


i hate life.


/rant

im tempted to make a fucking bunny character.


like the shy side of me.


i think i will do this.

yes.

im hooking up my old bamboo tablet to try to raise the money for some of the stuff i need.


SO

IM DOING 1, 2, AND 3 DOLLAR CHIBIS


OR 3, 4, AND 5 DOLLAR BUST


all with be colored. and possible shaded. chibis cell bust ill try soft shade on unless told otherwise.

i will stream it as soon as some people actually comment saying they want some.

if you wanna call it that....


eating put together meals from a church i dont even attend, kinda makes me feel like garbage.


i fucking hate this. >.>


but at least im eating right?

i want to learn to be a better artist.


and i think some constructive criticism would help?


maybe...


give me what ya got.

PLEASE go here ;___;




https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/3997176/


i still need a new tablet pen, but that isnt the only thing i need...

now we have no food in the house and ive gotten 2 hours in the last month at work >.<


donations/tips would be nice but i dont expect it. lol...

donations will probably get you a very happy sketch from me. just sayin.


if anyone wants to spread the word if you cant get one, i would REALLY appreciate it...


paying for my meds took the last of my money so im kinda.... fucked.

go here. pleaseeeeee. tablet pen isnt the only thing i need...


but i DO need that so i can do digital commissions again


https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/3997176/


also donations/tips would be nice of you too.. but i dont expect it. lol


if anyone wants to spread the word if you cant get one, that'd be AMAZING

stolen from  blackandgoldendragon


Comment on this Journal, and I'll...

1) Tell you something I learned about you by looking at your FA page for 13 seconds.
2) Tell you a color you remind me of.
3) Tell you my first memory of you.
4) Ask you a question.
5) Tell you something I like about you.
6) Tell you the object that is to the left of me.
7) Dare you to do this yourself in your Journal.

so yea just like comment here and shit and ill draw ever answering it.


if anyone wants to.


i will be using my old bamboo tablet since i have to pen though. so dont expect pics to look good at all.



also im still doing Psy What You Can commissions so if you can have at it

traditional or digital with my old tablet :D

https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/4011310/

some really nice people [i wont say who] bought me a new sketchbook, a new art set, and gave me the money to get some good inking pens...


i cant deny it. art is in my blood. no matter how crazy i get from no meds or pissy i get at something i draw not turning out just how i want.... i cant just stop it...

ive found myself doodling several times now...


SO WITH THAT SAID. emergency traditional commissions are still going on!!

https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/3997176/

and if you give me free range i can also use my new watercolors and pastels. <33333


i will also be doing some traditional PWYC commissions if anyone is interested. anything that can help me get to my new tablet pen is helpful

ignore the need for a ew tablet pen commissions or whatever.


im done with this.


everything ive been drawing looks like fucking garbage.

im not gonna call it artist block cause im pretty sure that doesnt last THIS FUCKING LONG.





so just fuck it. if i owe you some commissions ill try to refund you when i get the money.

or you can get your picture you ordered just know its gonna be a hung of shit.


like everything else ive been fucking drawing recently.




/rant