Okay seeing as I only update this now for my birthday I guess I'll just pop out the old one! So yeah, 23! I don't really have a whole lot to say except my birthday was lovely and I'm hoping the rest of the year will be too! Y'all are wonderful folks, truly, and I appreciate your still sticking around after all these years :)

22! Geeze, what a thought. This is actually a bit belated, I aged up on Saturday, but it was all in all a grand birthday. Got to spend the day itself at a local acreage learning about falconry as part of a class I'm taking for my degree! Got to hold a peregrine falcon and a saw-whet owl, which may be the cutest small bird in existence.

Had the party yesterday which essentially involved hours of boardgames with my friends, which was awesome! So yeah, no complaints here.

Thanks to you all for being such awesome folks, looking forward to spending another spin around the sun with you!

GRR GRR GRR

BLUH BLUH BLUUUH

Well I figure if all the cool kids are doing one...

2015 was a substantially better year for me than 2014 was, and I'm hopeful that 2016 will be just as good! I have had the chance to meet some incredible people over the year, and I've strengthened my relationships with those whom I've already met.

Thank you all so much for standing by me throughout the year, I cannot begin to say how lucky and honoured I am to know you all. Here's to an excellent 2016! :D

Well, a summer that began so nervously and with such timidness on my part is one that ended, at least in part, with me rediscovering my love and adoration for the canadian rockies that I have not felt in quite some time. It was an amazing experience, getting to spend time in such an amazing environment, and getting to invoke my passion both for that environment as well as for history and to share it with other people. Couple that with getting to stay in a gorgeous house with only one other person in it on a huge piece of property (thanks federal government :D) and I can safely say this has been one of the greatest experiences of my life.

It's one that has encouraged me to pursue areas that I easily became frustrated with a year ago (ie: drawing) and to keep on with them, no matter how tough it gets. This, combined with some closure I received has kind of led to me hitting this state that I have not felt in years, one of peace and happiness. One that I have missed dearly.

And so, as I move on into being legal everywhere and I guess an adult in the eyes of the world I want to thank all of you for continuing to stick with me, both friends whom I've recently met, and whom I've known for years now. You're all awesome people, and I would never be the person I am today without you all.

Thanks. :)

This afternoon I bid goodbye to my parents and watched as they pulled away from the hostel that I'm currently staying at. I think all three of us were fighting back some tears.

As I write this I'm sitting on my bottom bunk while I wait for my phone to charge so that I can go out and grab dinner.

The next four months are going to be the longest period I've ever been away from home, and the first time I've been completely on my own for something. It's scary. Honestly, I don't know if I've been this frightened before of something in my life, being far from home in a place where I have no contacts or friends.

But it's a good sense of fear. Not one that I'm used to, one of going back to the hellhole that is the deli, one of returning to an awful environment day after day for an entire summer. But rather one of the unknown, of what challenges and possibilities await me in the coming months.

I've always felt a sort of silly connection to the rockies. One that was cemented as I looked out onto the golden fields near Watterton national park in during the summer when I was in grade 9, when I realized that this is the place I wanted to be, the place I wanted to protect and nurture so that my grandkids' grandkids could look out and have that same wonderful moment that I did.

Even though I'm not doing conservation work, this summer marks the hopeful, nervous beginning of what I want to do with my life, of being surrounded by an environment that I've always loved and found joy in witnessing and experiencing.

So... Yes, it's utterly and impossibly terrifying to me right now, but at the same time I'm so looking forward to what the future holds for me.

And hey, it was in these mountains that I wrote my first actual story that I put up on FA, so perhaps they'll spur me on towards greater and greater artistic endeavours.

Is fucking awful. D:

My dad and I have spent the day looking for accommodations for my 4-month stint here and came up with one thus far that's a decent amount above me and my roommate's budget. Remaining optimistic, though! A lot of the locals said this is a good time to come into town since all the skiers are starting to leave.

Hopefully tomorrow will render more success!

Getting rid of the revolutionary spirit of the past journal now... Hmm, need something to fill the space...

...What's your favourite thing about macro/micro?

Mine is a bit cheesy, but I really like worlds that focus on the power dynamics between two peoples of distinct sizes. And as some may guess, I also love to do things when the power of love is stronger than even physics! :'D

Je me souviens.

Hello everyone! I'm currently in the process of writing Communication pt. IV (Which is halfway done, I'm happy to announce)!. And I currently have a rather fun story planned for after it's complete, to be released around the end of March! **This story is not related to communication on a massive scale, it'll be its own thing. There will be size stuff though so there's that :D**

I won't say much other than it has a loooot of opportunities for quick one-liner cameos and such, and so I need a fair amount of characters to fill in these one-off roles!

So if you're interested in one of these roles just leave a comment here or note me with the details! Also be sure to include whether or not you're okay with that character having an implied/off-screen death, and what kind of singing voice said character would have!

If you have any other questions I'll be happy to answer them to the best of my ability.

Thank ya!

Welp, approximately one year ago I entered into a rather nasty state of near constant stress and anxiety after failing my math midterm due to my own ineptitude (Missing the entire first page of the exam >.>). I mean honestly, in 2004 my grandma died, my two other grandparents moved away, and I also lost a little cousin I never got to meet two days after my grandma passed away... So I'm starting to think that years ending in '4' are not good for me!

My plan last year was to finish calculus and get my drivers license so that I could apply for a job working out in the field over the summer, unfortunately I failed to meet any of those due to my failing the calc course and just not having time to do drivers ed in the winter like I'd wanted to. So I spent my winter term stressed and depressed over my failure in the last term, which resulted in me having an utterly shite GPA, followed by field school completely wiping out whatever funds I'd saved up from working through highschool and such, which meant I had to do full time at the deli for four months straight. Aside from that places ability to drive you insane and make you hate everyone (seriously, it's not just me my coworkers felt the same way), it also served as a constant reminder that the only reason I was there was because I'd failed last year. Which you know, is great when entitled baby boomers and old people are calling you an idiot because "that's not how the store's original owner would have done it!" [Yeah this is why I didn't get a lot of writing done this year >.>]

So as you can imagine I was not really in the best state of mind as I started this term. And boy, what a start! Me missing a vital trip for one of my courses after spending a lot of money on equipment for it thanks to my getting stuck in traffic. Not only did I miss out, by the way, but I also held up the bus for an hour (which I'm sure afforded me nothing but the respect and love of people who will one day be my colleagues). Sooo I had to drop that course and go into a new one two weeks into the term to avoid the social repercussions as well as and academic ones that would spur from my missing a vital part of the course.

Sooo all of this compounded to my basically going insane with stress around the end of september as all of what I perceived as my own personal failures began to pile up and really just weigh down on me. In that time I'm sure I annoyed more than a few people with my always wanting to talk about bigness (well, smallness), which was really the only way I knew how to cope. And I know, it's escapism, it's not healthy but dammit I've played psychologist for more than enough people, and I couldn't expect really most of them to ever bother asking me how I felt on a given day. I... did look at some other methods of course, including going to see one of the psychologists on staff at the university to actually talk to someone, but thankfully one of you guys (you know who you are ;D) actually fucking listened to me for an hour, and we just talked and talked and like... holy shit I can never begin to tell you how much that meant to me. Truly, from the bottom of my heart, thank you.

...Holy shit this got rambly. Okay, onto the calculus part of this! I got my midterm back this morning, and I passed with a 60% (I fucking RUBBED those pages to make sure I wasn't missing any) . It was the first really amazing stress reliever I'd had all year and shit... I nearly broke down crying on the elevator down I was so happy. XD For most of today I've been in shock, because honestly I'd convinced myself that I'd failed again, probably to make coping with any failure easier now that I was already in that mindset. But now I'm just kinda overcome with this feeling of weightlessness. It's really nice!

Sooo yeah. Feeling better for the first time in a long while, gonna keep on studying for the final, and I'll be doing my road test for my license sometime this month. I am feeling like this is where I was supposed to be a year ago, but I suppose it's better to be late than never overall! X3 I've finally started working regularly on communication 3.5, no idea when it'll come out, but I'd like to finish it before the holidays!

Thanks folks, and ah, sorry to clog your journals up with rantyness on halloween night!

Welp today I turn twenty! Guess it's time to start investing in day stocks and stop listening to that rocky and roll music. D8<

Joking aside, I wanna take this time to thank all the awesome folks whom I've had the pleasure of meeting over the last year, as well as those whom I've known for longer! You guys are all excellent people and I highly doubt I could have gotten through some days without your support. So, thank you!

Oh also! Sorry to anyone waiting on the next part of communication. I have finally started on it, so I hope the field guide to the Spacezilla will serve as an adequate filler in its stead!

Welp today I turn twenty! Guess it's time to start investing in day stocks and stop listening to that rocky and roll music. D8<

Joking aside, I wanna take this time to thank all the awesome folks whom I've had the pleasure of meeting over the last year, as well as those whom I've known for longer! You guys are all excellent people and I highly doubt I could have gotten through some days without your support. So, thank you!

Oh also! Sorry to anyone waiting on the next part of communication. I have finally started on it, so I hope the field guide to the Spacezilla will serve as an adequate filler in its stead!

Hey! So my journal on field school will come by sunday at the latest (along with Half Life 3 I'm sure >.>) but I just wanted to take a moment to thank each and every one of you who's watching me. Like, honestly I never ever imagined I'd have 50 people who'd come to take a look at the sillyness that I write, let alone over twice that number!

It really and truly is a staggering thought to me, as well as an incredibly humbling one. I'm going to be doing my darndest to get a few more things written over the summer, including  Lennox 's story and the sequel to Learning a Name, as well as a couple of fun surprises that should be out before the year ends! :3

But seriously, I am immensely grateful for each and every one of you, because at the end of the day you're the one's who really make the time and effort I put into this stuff worth it. So, from the bottom of my heart, thank you.

Heyo heyo!

So as part of my program I'll be heading up to the north of the province for three weeks to learn and practice various field techniques. Stuff like digging soil profiles, doing prism plots (which is how you count how many trees there are in a given area), and getting to talk to various government, NGO, and private officials all involved in our field of study. We're even heading up to Fort McMurray for the day to visit the oil sands, so that should be an interesting experience.

We'll be staying in townhouses at a local college, and from what I've heard wifi connection around the campus is spotty at best, so I may not be online as much over the next few weeks. I DO intend to keep working at the next chapter of Communication (Which has been 80% done since January >.>) as well as a few other projects. But then, I've said the same before and nothing's come out of it, so we'll see! :/

Anyways, I'll update this when I get back. Until then, see ya!

Heyo folks!

Nothing much to add here except that I've added those fancy previous first and next buttons onto the various different series I have going! Since I tend to give each new chapter I make a unique title rather than a pt.1 pt.2 sort of deal (Well except for Communication on a Massive scale >.>) this should make it much easier to keep track of whatever series you're reading, rather than having to guess which one is next in the gallery.

Also added a google docs link to Communication pt. 1 since I realized that I had forgotten to do so last time!

Anyways, hope your holidays were merry (and bright), and that the start of 2014 is an awesome one for you!

Hope you're all having a fantastic day of food, family, and rest! (Especially that last part!)

Yeah you, with the face! Do you enjoy the video games? What about laughing? You like laughing, don't you? OF COURSE YOU DO.

That's why you should come watch  Xipher  petrakula  Spykr and myself (With special guest  Skinavish) on our new channel: CACTUS GAMING. Our first video is down below, so come on down and check it out!




Remember: every time you like, comment, and subscribe Remmyzilla grows by one mile!

Well, went and spoke with my prof about it and he said that while he couldn't do anything about the midterm (which, really, is understandable considering there are well over 3000 students who take elementary calculus at the university)that I don't have too much to worry about. Even without bothering to account for the curve I should still be within acceptable standards thanks to my marks in the labs and homework assignments. Though according to my TA with the class average being as low as it was I might have actually gotten a C+ or B-, so that's... surprising to say the least.

I really must apologize for making some of you guys worry about me. As I mentioned before I have been struggling with mathematics since grade 10, and it just shatters my self-confidence so easily whenever the slightest bad thing happens. I understand that it's a very immature reaction to such a thing, and so I try and keep from pegging everyone else down with it, and most of the time I am fairly successful, and whatever it was that was worrying me so much works itself out.

So all in all, life's returned back tomorrow. Wrote my organic chem midterm today, which I wasn't super pleased with, but we'll see how that goes. And I've got my Soils midterm #2 tomorrow, in which the theory is cake, but I've gotta practice the calculations a little bit more. Not too worried for that one, at least since they are pretty nice and easy to remember!

And after that DONE. Gonna be spending most of tomorrow afternoon either sleeping, chatting or writing (Possibly some combination of the three!). So that should be nice. :3

I failed the midterm.

The entirety of the last two months of my life have ben essentially dedicated to making sure this wouldn't happen. And you know what the worst part is? I shouldn't have failed. I barely failed. I failed because I missed the first page of questions. It stuck to the front page of my ecam when I flipped it over and I didn't notice that I'd started with question 2.

I don't really know how I feel right now. I'm kinda shifting between anger, Self-loathing and Self-pity. I've been dealing with problems in math for five years now and I've been everywhere from more determined to suicidal about it. Never really serious about it, but frustrated and tired enough to think about it at least. Now though? I dunno... guess all I can do is keep trying and do better on the final, which is worth 55 percent. So really it's not the end of the world, it's just going to be hard to face both myself and my parents today.

Anyways, that's that. Don't have much else to say other than it felt rather good to finally put those feelings into words after all this time.

Next chapter's still in the works, also. Should be up within the month if I put my mind to it after midterms and have time between reviews.

Heeeyy, look at that! 19 years on this big blue planet of ours. Not too shabby, if I do say so myself!

Not a whole lot to say here other than university's been chugging along; thankfully I'm understanding calculus much better this year AND I get to grapple with the horrors of OChem early on! Whee!

Oh! Also, I am working on the sequel to terror of the night, which should be up anytime between now and Christmas! :D Probably a lot sooner though, since I'd intended to work on it this weekend, but got sidetracked by a nasty cold.

And... that's it! :D Thanks to all you sweet folks who I've had the distinct pleasure of getting to meet and know over the past year! Hope we'll continue to chit-chat for many-a-birthday to come. ;3

Oh man, oh man, oh MAN!

If you haven't seen this yet, I highly recommend it! Without wishing to spoil too much I will just say that I am very pleased with how the film turned out. The story, characterization and of course the action scenes were all well-executed; and as an audience member I can honestly say that I was far more emotionally invested in them compared to the first movie, where a lot of my interest was based on the glitz and glamour of the shiny new ships. >.>

I loved that the movie few in a few references to the past series as well, some more subtle than others, but most managed to put a smile on my face at least!

It is of course not perfect, but it is certainly worth a watch. Thank you, Mr. Abrams for not royally buggering it up! :D

And with today drawing to a close, so ends my first year of university... With the fire alarm going off 15 minutes before my chem exam was supposed to end. Thaaankfully I was done by that point and was just gonna try to clean up some of my answers.

Nonetheless, I feel that all my exams went well and I am sooooo looking forward to just chillaxing for this summer.

Hey guys,

So let me tell you about  greenlioness I watched her a few years back, when she did a free art thing (which gave me the first *awesome* picture of West) Right now she's in a little bit of trouble money wise and she's doing awesome fullbody coloured commissions for just $5! + $5 more for each extra character/a detailed background. Seriously guys, she was good when she drew West all those years ago and has only gotten better since! So please, head on over to http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/4391962/ and give her some support!