Just going to leave this quick note here: Given that Microsoft's update policy for Windows 10 has changed in the past 3 or so years, what's now known as 'Windows as a Service', the way they address updates obviously has changed. Unfortunately, it's changed for the worse, as rather than ending support for a version of their software, they instead end support for given types of hardware. Basically, if your computer hardware doesn't meet their approval, even if it's one part, future updates will not install or run, regardless of actual specs.

Putting aside the stupidity and overreaching action of this for a moment, what this means is that there's a good chance my computer will no longer function properly. I've had this issue for a year without actually knowing the cause, but because my computer doesn't make Microsoft's Approved list, I can't install the Creator's update. Great, doesn't sound like a problem. However, Microsoft has taken to making their products act like virus it seems, and if I do not have this update before next month, my computer will effectively lock itself down and repeatedly demand I install an update that refuses to install due to hardware issues. Seeing as the Windows OS has a feature that forces a fresh install with a recently created copy to be able to change major parts of your hardware setup, this effectively means I need to buy a new computer, hard drive, and OS to be able to use windows 10 and my computer. And seeing as I have no idea what the 'offending' piece of hardware is, I'd have to effectively replace every single part of my computer to make sure it would run with windows.

I can't do that, because I don't have the money to buy a whole new computer from scratch. So, there's a good chance I will be vanishing from the internet for awhile, with small periods where I'm on my tablet or laptop. So, if you wonder where I am or why I haven't said anything for awhile, that's likely why. I'm not cold shouldering you, or ignoring you; I basically have no computer. Sorry.

Welp, my roommates moved out about....20 minutes ago? Not totally sure how to feel about it. On the one hand, I'm not going to lie, it's less of a burden on me financially with them moved out and it'll be nice having proper internet speeds again. But on the other, I am going to miss them. More so, I'm sad I missed out on the chance to hang out with them more. There wasn't much to do, but it was still enjoyable doing stuff together, and I missed out on that. Let this be a lesson that if you're really sick, like REALLY sick, get medication early, don't try and wait it out.

But, now they're gone, and I feel a little bit blue....Iunno, I guess I really do miss having people around in my life, and I'm still weak against the idea of not having friends in arms reach. I haven't seen my family-- My very close friends-- save for my sister in years, and her only once or twice a year. Everyone's left town as well, and those that are left....Well, they're looking to leave too. Shame really, because almost all of them have left and regretted it.

Still. Still, I'm glad I had those guys here even for a little while, even if it didn't go all that well all over. Kinda makes me look to the future and figure out what I need to do next. For now though, the house is quiet, and the rooms are empty. I wonder what will fill them next.

I've managed to get a new mouse that works so far, so I can get back to doing arts. If there's any of you that want something done, all you need to do is ask.

Now I know people don't give a shit what I say, but I kinda need to vent and get my thoughts down on paper....Er....You know what I mean.

So as of I want to say Oct. 24th, 25th? I no longer have access to my Telegram account. A forced update by Win10 caused pretty much all my saved account info to be wiped across the board. Fuck you Microsoft -cough- Now this normally isn't an issue, because most sites and platforms let you choose your password, an email to get recovery options....Telegram is different.

For those who don't know, Telegram is basically like Skype or Discord but with better features. It has stickers, you can make groups, you can get calls that don't shit themselves like the other two platforms-- It's designed to be a messaging platform. Great, it does that well. Here's the catch. You need to put in a phone number to make an account. And you don't need to-- or in some cases don't have the option to-- put in an email address. It's just that phone number.

Now for some, that's a bit much. They worry about people stealing their phone number or being cold called by people because they got it. They claim it's safe, but it's really not as I'm finding out, and we'll get onto that in a bit. The problem I'm having though is I don't have the same phone number I had when I made the account. I made it over two years ago, and I never gave a fuck about my phone number, because nothing has ever said 'you need the same number for this to function.' Well Telegram does. Because to access your account, you need to get a Text Message/SMS with a code to unlock the account. And that's where this all started: I had to somehow figure out which phone number was tied to the account, and get a message from it to gain access to my account.

Now, I got the phone number, but clearly I can't get the message. For reference, the phone that it's tied to got crushed under the wheel of a bus. It Physically no longer exists. So I tried reaching out to Telegram support. Now hold on to your seats and don't jump up with questions you'll be able to ask at the end. There are two flavors of telegram support. 'Ask a Question', which is built into Telegram, and a 'Telegram Support' web page. The Ask a Question can only be accessed while logged into an account. Thus it's useless for account recovery. The Web Page has an even worse setup. You have to type out a question and all that, but then you have to put in an email and phone number tied to an account. The phone number is whatever at this point, but remember I said you can make an account without an email? Yeah, here's the brilliant thing: If you don't put in BOTH a valid email and number, the support ticket gets deleted. Great customer service.

So my next thought of course is go find the forums and ask-- There are no forums. The closest thing is a Reddit, where if you ask for help you either have the topic deleted, or have a volunteer tell you 'this sub reddit is not for support.' Okay, what is the subreddit for support. 'Discord or Twitter.' No, I'm not joking, they just said that their main support 'forum' is Twitter, where you have a 100 character limit and no visibility, or Discord, the platform they're competing with. It's like that joke about Bing, and how you'd have to Google it to know what Bing is.

So fast forward a whole day and a half. I haven't received any feedback from Telegram support, I'm still locked out of my account, and after saying 'fuck it I'll make a new account' I find out that you can't. Not without getting a new device. Why? Oh the account you can't gain access to, yeah it's still logged in, and you can't have two accounts logged in at the same time. So until I get my original account back I can't use Telegram on my PC. So I'm pissed, clearly, and I'm trying to reach out to everyone....And it turns out that I'm not the only one with this issue. Pretty much most the people I know on Telegram PC-- 9 for every 10 basically-- had the same thing happen; Forced update, passwords wiped, all that. Some of them still had their phones and could get the message. Like me however, the rest didn't hang on to their phone or SIM card from however many years ago. And they're pretty much in the same bind. None of them know about the problem with support, or anything I mentioned above, and when I did it was like watching despair in motion.

So now we're at the point where we're trying to get Telegram's attention-- not easy-- through twitter-- even less easy-- and finding alternative solutions. As someone who isn't a volunteer pointed out on Reddit, if you're not logged into more than one device with Telegram, you're basically locked out until you get the number. So the options are

Call your Cell carrier to ask for your old phone number, and hope it's not in use.
Switch out the SIM card if you have it
Or hack your own account.

And ironically, the last option as absurd as it sounds is the most viable it seems. I haven't done it yet, mainly because I don't want to invite misfortune over a chat platform, but it's pretty simple to spoof your phone number to basically reroute text messages and calls to where ever you want. So much for Telegram being secure....

So that's where we're at. Telegram basally locks you out from using the platform if you don't hang on to the phone you make it with, and their customer support doesn't exist if you're not on Telegram. That's pretty absurd considering how often people change their phones and phone numbers. And I don't know anyone who keeps their same phone number either. Maybe that's just me. But more or less, don't use Telegram. I know it's great, it's fun, and it has stickers, but I'm steadily finding out more and more ways that you can just be locked out of your account, even if you do have your phone, and....I can't help but shake my head.

I said I wouldn't do this at some point, but...Things have changed, and now I am! I'll be open to taking commissions if you're interested in getting something done like one of my pieces.

I primarily do physical art, digital work ups of them, and simple shadings. I'm also likely going to have sprite/pixel work up in the near future to show what I can do, along with animations once I get my program working right.

If you're curious about how it'll all work, or want to get a piece, go here! HERE, OVER HERE!

streaming over at https://picarto.tv/Gigaus

Come join us~

but can't fking finding it when you look for it anywhere? I'm having that hard time now with a few pictures. ;w;
Kinda wondering if they got deleted, but....I have no idea.

Come join us~

https://www.twitch.tv/gigaus0

This is gonna be kinda ranty, so if you don't like that, you've been warned.

For some of you, you know I used to run a business, basically selling jewelry and bobbles. For those of you that don't know, I liquidated it to buy a car because some jackass T-boned the family one, and our insurance pretty much shafted us. When it was on the raise, I started looking into doing conventions and traveling, which despite what most say isn't hard. At least for me, I'm used to travel and the like, just mean's extra stuff to carry around. Between my experience with the travel system in the US, and the people in it, getting from say NY to Calli basically amounted to working a couple weeks overtime and planning an extended weekend. Thing is, in most my travels, I had somewhere to stay; No booking a hotel or anything. So I was shocked at how much one costs a night, normally. $100+ usd, nightly, some going upwards of $200 usd. For those that don't get why that seems like much, at least in my area a month's rent or mortgage is roughly $1,000 USD, and these places were asking for half to about the same for five nights. I get that they're supposed to be 'uber fancy, with the best quality blah blahs', but they didn't have to make it that way. And it only gets worse when there's events going on, because they know most people who go to these major events don't live around the area, so it's either pay a ransom for a room or sleep in a car, if that. And for reference, most of these events at most cost $100 Usd in total.

Well, I a friend who's going to a fur con in the near future, and he's getting a room for 5 days. Con tickets cost $50 usd, a plane ticket is about $400, the Hotel is $1,100 Usd for 4 days. I....Just why? Yeah it's being split between three people, but jesus that's half a month's paycheck almost for a lot of people, just for four days? And he's just going as a con-goer; As a dealer, it's even harder because you usually have to put up for anyone else who might be working with you, which just makes your expenses jump through the roof. I was shocked enough I started looking at prices in the area, and the lowest I found was $100 bucks a night for what amounted to a box with a bed in it. How is this reasonable at all? Again, I get that it's 'quality' and all that, or 'security' in some cases, but there's no other options other than those kinds of hotels. I come from a town where, for whatever reason, we have 20 hotels. All of them are these 'high class' places, that all offer effectively the same rates. All the cheap motels were muscled out long ago, and it's basically an oligarchy where these guys have an excuse for their prices and why they keep them so high.

I can't be the only one out there that looks at these and bulks. I can't. Even as a business owner, there's nothing that could justify a single expense cost being double to five times as much as the costs on the budget, unless it's a highly dangerous place. Security in a wartorn or high crime area, sure, I get that. But....I don't think anyone's going to say that you need 1k worth of security in any major US city, let alone some minor ones. If a city is THAT dangerous, then it's not worth the risk of trying to sell there. And when it comes to the 'quality', most people just want a place to sleep at the end of the day, and that they know where they left their cloths and crap. Most people won't care the bedsheets are lined with gold and the nightstand's powdered with jade. The prices are too high, and I have to beg the question is there anything that can be done about it? I mean, I can't imagine that these events are too happy about it unless they're getting a cut, and even then....Prices that high pretty much are the reason why the vast majority of people don't go to these events. Admission, cheap. Spending cash, just go without the stuff you normally get on the side for awhile. Transportation, most people have cars, and busses and trains are vastly cheaper than people believe. Again, going from NY state to Cali by train amounted to me working a few extra weekends, nothing extraordinary. But the price on these hotels, especially during events... Again, it's essentially half of a month's paycheck. I can imagine how many more people would go to these events, ones that already are bringing in a few hundred to a few thousand if the hotels didn't cost an arm and a leg. Or more than a few months of food, or gas, or god knows whatelse.

Iunno...If something can or could be done, I'd love to hear it, but as it stands...It just seems like Hotels are just unreasonable in price, no matter which way you slice it.

I'm sick of people demanding I get discord when I have 4 other VoIP/Vcom apps that work perfectly fine and don't fuck up at every turn. I literally can't use it because of a change in how they handle Microphones now, and because they decided to remove the 'mic is always on' option in favor of 'only turns on when there's sound' or 'you push a button like a dumbass', I can no longer play with my friends or have a basic conversation with them if they decide to play a game. And that's just a 'small' problem with it....Why, why would I ever bother with a platform that's more bugs and missing features than functionality?

For anyone out there thinking of setting up discord: Do your friends a favor and don't. It's more hassle than it's worth. There's over a hundred different options, and they all work. And don't require three fucking links just to talk to your friends.

I normally don't do this because I normally don;t have to. You guys seem to find your way onto my stream naturally and just hang out.

But it's for that reason I'm posting this. I'm going to be streaming a game with the intent of capturing harassment, racial slurrs, general bigotry, and other lovely things that can upset, disgust, and anger people. Why? Because the devs are actively trying to hide that their community is toxic, and pushing against one of my friends who reported one of their favored players when he was called, and I quote, 'A n---er c--t that needs a good fucking in their whiny pussy'. Don't expect a solid explanation of why I'm doing this, it's mostly just to get proof that yes, this is an extremely toxic community, and no you shouldn't play this game.

If you dare to watch, or just care to see me play a game, the link is as follows

https://www.twitch.tv/gigaus0

And realized how many people I've met over the years...And forgotten. It's always concerning for me, because my memory is that bad, that I can just out and out forget someone who I was talking to for a long time, including people important to me. But damn, there's a lot of people I used to talk to regularly, that I don't anymore and totally forgot about them. Hell some that I don't think I even talked to much and we still had random conversations. Kinda makes me wonder who's still around...And if I should reach out to people again.

Also, I have never deleted a note from my inbox....or a Submission for that matter. I have over 100k submissions sitting around <w<;

Along with the now 13 other people they decided to add onto the list. How cute. They also claimed a bunch of stuff that wasn't true, and made it a point of pointing out that the guy that was stalking me was the one pushing this. Again, how cute. Guess I need to go call my lawyer and have some charges added. :/

With that said, I want to thank all of you that have been showing me support, even when I haven't asked nor deserve it. I especially want to thank those of you who have shown me that I'm not the only one Flist has been bullying-- No Flist, I don't care who see me saying this, you're on record for harassment, so it's not slander. Get a decent lawyer to tell you the difference assholes. It's good to know that I'm not the only one they're singling out, and that people are realistically approaching this problem. That aside, I don't think I could ask for better friends, and so many...I expected at most one or two to pop up with support, not so many that I have trouble fitting you all in XD;
It also warms me that people care enough, even when given reason not to. So many of my friends, or former friends, dropped me when they were getting harassed, by other people, by admins, by random people. All so they could stop being harassed. Now to see people standing with me is....Comforting. So thank you, you who stood by me and showed I wasn't alone, and could count on you. Thank you.

Now, back to having a semi-normal life with crazy people bothering me...

So I found out recently that a friend of mine got involved with the guy I got a restraining order against. Yes, that guy, the one that's never been named publicly. Now you'd think 'okay, then just don't hang out with that person when the other guy is around.' Nope. That's not how restraining orders work in the US. Can't speak to other countries, but in the US when you get a restraining order, they place a restraining order on both of you, and treat the person who got the order with the same degree of innocence as the person it was placed on. That is to say, none. So by mandate, they can't contact me, they can't send me stuff, they can't be X meters from me knowingly, knowingly attend meetings or events I'm at, or solicit known associates or family members....And it goes the same way for me. Most of that ends up being common sense, but....That last bit pretty much rounds out to 'you can't hang out with people who are friends of said person.'

Which means to keep the restraining order against the guy that threatened me, I have to stop hanging out with people I know are friends with him or face the possibility of the order being turned back against me. So I get the great task of telling people I like that I can't be friends with them anymore, because some guy decided to stalk me and threaten me.....Of course some people have already said 'just get them to stop being friends with him.' No...I'm not that guy, and I never want to be that guy. He may be a complete tool, but I'm not going to stoop to his level and try and take his friends away. I rather just back off, even it if ends up hurting me a lot. And my friends...It really, really sucks, because I liked that guy a lot. Enough to call him a close friend and plan stuff with 'em. Now because of shitty laws and a guy that won't take no for an answer, I have to be a villain again and ruin his day. There's a reason I have so few friends....

Iunno......I just find this whole thing to be utter bullshit. First I'm pushed out because I won't talk to my first stalker, then I'm kicked out of the place I hang out with my friends because some prick doesn't like being blocked and has friends higher up? And now to keep the order that's supposedly protecting me from more of his attacks, I have to tear apart my social life.....I just want to know when this ends...

The ban on mine and 7 other people's account has been lifted after pretty much all of us proved that we weren't the same person, and that the charges were bogus. By that I mean, nothing was done, and it finally rolled over. Despite logs from several people, the person that was never named, and never will be despite his attention grabbing and harrassment wasn't banned for harassment, block evasion, or filing a false report. Typical Flist.

I'm writting this mostly as a formality. Both to mark when the ban ended, and to signal intent. I'm not going to be using my Flist account for the forseeable future due to the level of corruption and harassment that goes on that site. Apparently there's already enough evidence to file a class action against these guys, though I imagine it won't pan out too much. In the event that say someone logs on using the name or account Gigaus, or my likeness, it is not me. Nor is it anyone I trust with my account. Most likely, it is either an admin checking things, or someone has taken the account. I'm going to get Gigaus verified just for the sake of not being called an Alt again, and to prove I'm the owner of that account and no one should be on it. Knowing Flist though, even if someone does steal the account, they'll just blame the victim like they always do, and just say it was account sharing. 'There's no account hacking on Flist!' the say after hiring someone who stole someone's account just to gain ownership of a room.

After this point, if I do not post a journal here stating that I have returned to active use of the account, it is not me, and I will go as far as to submit my computer to prove it. Yes, we are at that point where the drama crossed over from being silly bullshit, to I have to actually give over my shit to make sure I and those around me don't get attacked again. Again.
If you hear of Gigaus or any of my other characters [to be listed] doing something on Flist or Fchat, please contact me. If you hear general badmouthing claiming I did something somewhere, please contact me. Or if someone is claiming that you are an Alt of mine, please contact me. These are now matters that need to be legally handled, and a level of investigation will need to be done to see if someone has violated their restraining order. Or if new ones need to be drafted.

I need to wonder....What the fuck is wrong with people that hanging out on a social site has turned into fucking legal battles and internet stalking....Can't we just hang out and chill?

I was just inventorying my HardDrive, and couldn't figure out where all my space was going. Then I found a folder labled 'Stream Videos'. 6 months worth of streams all recorded straight to my hd. I COMPLETELY FORGOT THAT OBS DOES THAT.

Now to sort them all out.

The guy that I mentioned in the last journal-- you know, the one I didn't name-- He keeps messaging me to get me to take it all down because it would 'tarnish his name'. He even threatened to post a counter journal! If he does, you should totally go check it out, see the guy who didn't want to be named naming himself. :/

Why do I attract the worst people like this...

I'm writing this mostly because I think I'll either forget to, or lose the chance to all things considered. I doubt the people this is intended to reach will see it, but who knows. If something does go down I'll probably link it where it'll get noticed.

As of...What, this passed monday? Earlier this week, both my Mother and Aunt were demoted and given notice by their boss [same woman] for a bunch of bullshit reasons. The short long of it is they're medical coders [billing] and one of the higher up's kids wanted a job at their work, so they're making room by giving them management positions. They ended up having panic attacks and going to the hospital because of it, and are out on sick leave. They haven't gone back to work because...Lets be honest, they'll get fired if they go in, so they're biding their time, looking at options of what to do. Sadly, we live in the US, so more than likely they'll end up unemployed despite their experience. This means that between the car accident, my uncle's bad leg, and this, we have no options; I can't go anywhere to sell my stock, and getting a job in the US apparently is impossible for someone in my position, my Cosine moved across country a month and a half ago, and the rest of our family is scattered. All in all, their jobs were our last lifeline while me and my uncle got back on our feet. Literally and figuratively.

Since we live in the US, if we can't make rent payments, we'll be thrown out of our apartment. Literally. And without a permanent residence, we fall under Vagrancy laws. For those of you not living in the US, that means Anti-homeless laws; It is literally a crime to be without a job and a home in the US. Because of this, it's more than likely we'll end up having to move from place to place to avoid being arrested, while trying to find some kind of work and housing. This isn't to say that this scenario is an absolute, we are looking into alternatives to just living on the street obviously, but we've had to be really honest with ourselves. We live in the US, where people see it as a pseudo-crime to ask for assistance, and where a lot of public programs have been gutted for one reason or another. Hell, my Uncle is a vet, and he can't get any kind of assistance despite his service, what could the rest of us get? So I'm writing this as a heads up, I'm likely to just drop of the face of the earth for awhile. Iunno when, but I like to give ample warning. You guys are my friends, and I don't want you thinking that I'm avoiding you guys, or that it's something you did if I go dark; I just don't have a connection and all that jazz.

---

Now on that note, the other reason I'm writing this is to give some...coverage?...Perspective?...Iunno, I'm not good with words anymore, but I need to put a couple things out there, and vent at the same time I suppose. Today's been a pretty terrible day to be honest. Started off great thanks to Rift and Krios, and now I...I'm pretty numb and worn out because of...You know, I won't name names. I should, and I don't mean that in a vindictive way, I should because the person that started this is apparently so volatile even talking to them is enough excuse for them to attack people. It's mostly furry drama, but...It's also the kind of stuff that, passed the drama, really does hurt and is going as far enough to effect my social life and that of my friends.

I'd say...couple hours before writing this, I got a message from someone who had blocked me on skype on flist. This person blocked me because he thought that I was lying about something I said about another person, a person that's been harassing me through proxi, rumor-mongering, and wholesale stalking, and in a brilliant leap in logic decided to force me into a group chat with my stalker to demand we talk and try and make up. This is the part where I make a face that expresses how stupid I think he is for trying to do that to anyone. When I leave the conversation, he takes that leap in assuming 'you're the first to leave, so you must be the liar -block-'. It hurt, but...As pretty much everyone pointed out, he was dumb enough to try and push someone to their stalker after backstabbing them, not worth it.

Fast forward to today, when I get a message from him out of the blue being snippy, saying 'you're being rude, please don't do that again' or some such. I asked him what he meant, and instead of answering he says 'I blocked you for lying to me, best not to keep doing it' and wanted me to fess up to being someone else. Turns out, a friend staying over at my place had messaged an alternate character of his to find out if it was him playing him, and blocked him when he did. For whatever reason, he believed that A; it was me, and B; that after being blocked on two communications that it'd be okay to message someone on a different line to yell at them. Okay, sure.....My friend sees this and decides to message him again, and tell him no, it wasn't me that messaged him, it was him that did. Now I don't know what went on between them, I kinda don't care. What I do know is that after my friend blocks this guy, and I block him for the third time, my friend gets messaged by an Admin on flist stating that he'd get a month long ban for messaging that guy.

So...The guy that I blocked goes around that, just to harass me, because a friend blocked him, and....Somehow my friend is the one to be banned?...Okay, sure...That makes sense, right?

But it gets better. Because he's here rooming with us while he's in town, he's on our wifi. Meaning that every account in the apartment building-- yes, believe it or not there's more than one furry in this building, surprising-- is either an alt of this one guy, or account sharing. This isn't the first time we've been fingered like this either, the guy two floors up got banned for 'ignoring an admin' and I got banned for it too. So surprise, I get banned from flist because of the above. I'll end up making an appeal for it, but...Considering it was less than five minutes before my friend got banned after he blocked the guy, it's likely this guy has an Admin friend that will just delete the appeal. But...All that isn't even why I'm typing this. No...I posted before I got kicked that I was likely to be banned over this, writing on the wall and all that, so people would know to message me else where. And people did, and I'm very thankful to those of you who came to me to get my side of all this, and showed support. You're good friends and I thank you for that.

But then I got one person who said that people were upset that I and a few others were banned.....And were promptly being told that we were banned for stalking and harassing someone for their account information. And then another...And then two more....

I have no way of confirming any of this; I can't check my emails on flist, or see what's going on with my friends, or speak out in any way. I'm practically blind on there. But when more than one person comes to me with the same story, who don't know eachother, I tend to believe them. So I'm writing this part to say, no, we did not stalk, harass, pressure, bully, or do anything of the sort to try and obtain someone's account information. That is a complete and total fabrication to discredit us.

That aside, I just....I'm feeling very weak, and very powerless because of this. This isn't the first time admin abuse has happened on Flist, or to me and my friends specificlly. Hell, the last time I was banned, it was because some snot ran to his admin master claiming I said I'd 'hack the site with my L33t skillz and do all these nasty things!' to keep me from reporting him. Yeah, I got banned by the guy I was reporting, to stop me from reporting. But this is one of those times where...Someone I considered a good friend completely and maliciously turned on me without provocation. It's rare that it happens, but it shakes me deep....and I just...I'm scared that when I finally do get back my ability to act, it'll be too late, ya know? I mean...It hasn't even been three fking hours, and already there's rumors? really? I know I;m not the most likable guy, but fuck me...I didn't know I had THAT many enemies waiting to jump at the chance....Iunno...I'm rambling...

Either way, I...Said what I needed to I suppose. I'm sorry if I fall off the grid you guy, I should have done better to prevent all of this...Just...Know I'll be around to try and give love, okay?

I don't normally do this, either out of pride or respect, but I'm in a rather tight bind. The other day my family got into a car accident where one of those giant ass Ford trucks Tboned our family car and practically totaled it. Everyone is fine, thankfully, and the medical costs were covered. What wasn't covered was the car insurance. It'll pay out, but as usual they're dragging their feet, and we were given an estimate of three months before they might pay out. That of course wouldn't do, we need our car, so I had to drain my funds to get a replacement right away.

That of course threw a wrench in my plans for the foreseeable future. I was planning on going to a few cons, Otakon, Furry Migration, and a few minor cons and events around Ny. As of right now, I have no means to recover the cash I sunk into the car, nor any funds left over to even pay the entry fee for these cons. Those of you that had orders with me already know this, but to most everyone else this is news, afterall you don't see me posting about my sales stuff often, mainly because a large chunk of my sales come from commissions, other sites, or local shows. This also means that I've had to put orders that I was going to deliver at these conventions on hold, and work out different options for the buyers. To that end, I'm here asking this.

Over the next couple months, I'm going to be opening up my stock on here and else where, and opening up commissions as much as I can. I'll end up burning through my stock for a couple cons, but I'm hoping you guys can possibly help get me enough cash to make it to FM, so I can get back on my feet and get you guys what you asked for. I'll be giving discounts to commissions, and fielding the cost for unusual or out of stock materials up front. In return, I'm reaching out and asking that if you have extra cash, or an event coming up where you need a gift, please shop with me. I can promise the best quality and speedy service where my stock is concerned, as well as better prices than what you'll see elsewhere.

Beyond that, I don't know what to say here, kinda out of my depth. I just hope you can find it in yourself to help me out here.

Just finished uploading all of the dragons currently for sale over at  Dragon_Rings right now. You can check out the spread here and find something you like!

http://www.furaffinity.net/view/19933107/

I've got a few options and don't know what you guys wanna see...So tell me!

Fallout 4
Fallout 3
Fallout New Vags
Warframe
Dying Light
Fable 1 - Lost Chapters
Killing Floor
Killing Floor 2
Path Of Exile [Why?]
Saints row 2~4
AntiChamber
Bioshock 1,2,Infinite
Dead Rising 2/Off the Record
Dead Space [no face cam, period]
Hammerwatch
Jet Set Radio
Mass Effect 1/2
Metal Gear Raising Revengence
Rebel Galaxy
Sanctum 1/2
Sleeping Dogs
SPAZ [Space Pirates and Zombies]
Starwars KOTOR 1/2
Terraria
The Witcher 1/2/3
Warhammer Spacemarine
Warhammer Dawn of War 2

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[fill] Game Cube games on emulator
[fill] Playstation 1/2 on emulator

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THINGS!

Love some feedback so I'm not just streaming guff.

For a lot of people this might seem like drama or attention grabbing, but...Iunno, I made a mistake and it hit me pretty hard in a way it really shouldn't have.

Why do any of you stick around me? Why do any of you trust me? Or try and get my attention? What about me makes you all react the way you do? Because, I don't understand it. At all. I can't understand why people like me, or hate me, or look at me the way they do. I was wired differently when I came out, and I just...part of me doesn't care about those things normally. I can't process it. I can't figure half of it out. So..Why? I don't see any reason why anyone would keep around me other than to satisfy themselves. And it doesn't explain why some of you do it unconditionally, or even knowing you won't get anything out of it. And from what so many people have told me, there doesn't seem any reason at all anyone should trust me. It seems there's more reason to think I'm lying every time I open my mouth. So....Why are some of you guys different? Could...Iunno, someone explain it to me and help me see?

With James wolf too! come and watch <3

https://www.twitch.tv/gigaus0

Another year gone by, oh joy.