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General | Posted 7 years agoBig thanks to Crispr for allowing the use of a panther character as my new face.
Been a while
General | Posted 12 years agoGuess I should post something else.
Ummm...scotch is really fucking good?
Ummm...scotch is really fucking good?
The Man turns 96!
General | Posted 15 years agoWell, it's almost happened. "Jumping" Jack LaLanne turns 96 on Sunday, and believe me when I say that this guy could still kick most people's asses, bang their girlfriends, and call it a warm-up.
I just think it's something we all need to remember, a vey simple rule: Exercise, eat healthy, live to be a nonogeneric stud.
I just think it's something we all need to remember, a vey simple rule: Exercise, eat healthy, live to be a nonogeneric stud.
Hair relaxers
General | Posted 15 years agoSo, I recently got a chemical straightener to try and relax my hair (which it did). Unfortunately, it also gave me a pretty nasty chemical burn all around my hairline and burned off a few patches of hair on the top.
Now, I realize that it's the product that did this, and for the most part, the people who did it probably didn't mean to do this, but all in all, I don't feel that one hundred bucks is a good price to pay to basically get maimed.
Probably won't be doing it again.
Now, I realize that it's the product that did this, and for the most part, the people who did it probably didn't mean to do this, but all in all, I don't feel that one hundred bucks is a good price to pay to basically get maimed.
Probably won't be doing it again.
Strange...
General | Posted 15 years agoThis really has no substance, or any relation to anything, really, but I found it interesting.
A little while ago I posted a youtube comment stating "there are really only two possibilities; either we're alone in the universe, or we're not." It's gotten the most replies out of anything I've submitted anywhere...ever.
Strange...
ps- I'd recommend checking out the video (The sound of Jupiter through electromagnetic resonance). It's both calming and cold...kinda like Silent Hill...except that's not at all calming.
A little while ago I posted a youtube comment stating "there are really only two possibilities; either we're alone in the universe, or we're not." It's gotten the most replies out of anything I've submitted anywhere...ever.
Strange...
ps- I'd recommend checking out the video (The sound of Jupiter through electromagnetic resonance). It's both calming and cold...kinda like Silent Hill...except that's not at all calming.
Cuz it looked too fun not to do.
General | Posted 16 years ago1 - Do you shower in the morning or evening? Morning, unless I work out that day, in which case after that.
2 - Do you use liquid or bar soap? Bar soap. I feel cleaner with it.
3 - Do you use shampoo and conditioner or just shampoo? Both. My hair would Harpo the fuck out if I didn't.
4 - Do you brush your teeth in the shower? No man, but that sounds like a good idea.
5 - Do you shave in the shower? No
6 - Do you sing in the shower? I try to get through "Thick As A Brick" each time.
7 - Do you use a washcloth? When I have one, but no. Probably should.
8 - Do you have a door or a curtain on your shower? Curtain in the dorm showers. It's all mouldy and gross.
9 - Have you ever taken a call in the shower? No stall calls.
10 - Have you ever showered in your swimsuit? Can't say as I have.
11 - Have you ever showered with a member of the same sex? I suppose the showers at the swimming pool count, so yes.
12 - Have you ever showered with a member of the opposite sex? That'd be fun...and effecient.
13 - Do you share a bathroom with someone? Yes. Approximately 70 other guys.
14 - Do you listen to the radio in the shower? No, but I should.
15 - Do you wear a shower cap? Nope.
16 - Do you wash behind your ears? Behind my ears, under my balls, crack of my ass...it's an all over cleansing. Nothing quite like being clean all over.
17 - Describe your shower in three words. Stop watching me.
18 - What one thing would you change about your shower? Jeez, where do I start? No black mould would be nice, the harr in the drain is disgusting, and someone keeps taking a dump in one of the stalls. There are toilets literally ten feet away!
19 - What would make your shower time better for you? Not having to look for poop before going in.
20 - What celebrity would you like to shower with? One of the hot ones. Halle Berry is still hot, right?
21 - What celebrity would you NOT like to shower with? John Goodman. *shiver*
22 - What is the one thing you can't do without in your shower? in this case, sandals. You could get god damned flesh eating disease!
23 - What is the oddest thing that has happened to you in the shower? Listening to people fuck in the next stall over...and not be quiet at all.
24 - What is the best thing that has happened to you in the shower? Not a whole lot really happens...when I shower with a pretty girl, that'll be the best.
25 - When was the last time you showered? Yesterday evening.
26 - When are you going to take a shower next? Soon. When the stank eats through my shirt.
2 - Do you use liquid or bar soap? Bar soap. I feel cleaner with it.
3 - Do you use shampoo and conditioner or just shampoo? Both. My hair would Harpo the fuck out if I didn't.
4 - Do you brush your teeth in the shower? No man, but that sounds like a good idea.
5 - Do you shave in the shower? No
6 - Do you sing in the shower? I try to get through "Thick As A Brick" each time.
7 - Do you use a washcloth? When I have one, but no. Probably should.
8 - Do you have a door or a curtain on your shower? Curtain in the dorm showers. It's all mouldy and gross.
9 - Have you ever taken a call in the shower? No stall calls.
10 - Have you ever showered in your swimsuit? Can't say as I have.
11 - Have you ever showered with a member of the same sex? I suppose the showers at the swimming pool count, so yes.
12 - Have you ever showered with a member of the opposite sex? That'd be fun...and effecient.
13 - Do you share a bathroom with someone? Yes. Approximately 70 other guys.
14 - Do you listen to the radio in the shower? No, but I should.
15 - Do you wear a shower cap? Nope.
16 - Do you wash behind your ears? Behind my ears, under my balls, crack of my ass...it's an all over cleansing. Nothing quite like being clean all over.
17 - Describe your shower in three words. Stop watching me.
18 - What one thing would you change about your shower? Jeez, where do I start? No black mould would be nice, the harr in the drain is disgusting, and someone keeps taking a dump in one of the stalls. There are toilets literally ten feet away!
19 - What would make your shower time better for you? Not having to look for poop before going in.
20 - What celebrity would you like to shower with? One of the hot ones. Halle Berry is still hot, right?
21 - What celebrity would you NOT like to shower with? John Goodman. *shiver*
22 - What is the one thing you can't do without in your shower? in this case, sandals. You could get god damned flesh eating disease!
23 - What is the oddest thing that has happened to you in the shower? Listening to people fuck in the next stall over...and not be quiet at all.
24 - What is the best thing that has happened to you in the shower? Not a whole lot really happens...when I shower with a pretty girl, that'll be the best.
25 - When was the last time you showered? Yesterday evening.
26 - When are you going to take a shower next? Soon. When the stank eats through my shirt.
Cuz it looked too fun not to do.
General | Posted 16 years ago1 - Do you shower in the morning or evening? Morning, unless I work out that day, in which case after that.
2 - Do you use liquid or bar soap? Bar soap. I feel cleaner with it.
3 - Do you use shampoo and conditioner or just shampoo? Both. My hair would Harpo the fuck out if I didn't.
4 - Do you brush your teeth in the shower? No man, but that sounds like a good idea.
5 - Do you shave in the shower? No
6 - Do you sing in the shower? I try to get through "Thick As A Brick" each time.
7 - Do you use a washcloth? When I have one, but no. Probably should.
8 - Do you have a door or a curtain on your shower? Curtain in the dorm showers. It's all mouldy and gross.
9 - Have you ever taken a call in the shower? No stall calls.
10 - Have you ever showered in your swimsuit? Can't say as I have.
11 - Have you ever showered with a member of the same sex? I suppose the showers at the swimming pool count, so yes.
12 - Have you ever showered with a member of the opposite sex? That'd be fun...and effecient.
13 - Do you share a bathroom with someone? Yes. Approximately 70 other guys.
14 - Do you listen to the radio in the shower? No, but I should.
15 - Do you wear a shower cap? Nope.
16 - Do you wash behind your ears? Behind my ears, under my balls, crack of my ass...it's an all over cleansing. Nothing quite like being clean all over.
17 - Describe your shower in three words. Stop watching me.
18 - What one thing would you change about your shower? Jeez, where do I start? No black mould would be nice, the harr in the drain is disgusting, and someone keeps taking a dump in one of the stalls. There are toilets literally ten feet away!
19 - What would make your shower time better for you? Not having to look for poop before going in.
20 - What celebrity would you like to shower with? One of the hot ones. Halle Berry is still hot, right?
21 - What celebrity would you NOT like to shower with? John Goodman. *shiver*
22 - What is the one thing you can't do without in your shower? in this case, sandals. You could get god damned flesh eating disease!
23 - What is the oddest thing that has happened to you in the shower? Listening to people fuck in the next stall over...and not be quiet at all.
24 - What is the best thing that has happened to you in the shower? Not a whole lot really happens...when I shower with a pretty girl, that'll be the best.
25 - When was the last time you showered? Yesterday evening.
26 - When are you going to take a shower next? Soon. When the stank eats through my shirt.
2 - Do you use liquid or bar soap? Bar soap. I feel cleaner with it.
3 - Do you use shampoo and conditioner or just shampoo? Both. My hair would Harpo the fuck out if I didn't.
4 - Do you brush your teeth in the shower? No man, but that sounds like a good idea.
5 - Do you shave in the shower? No
6 - Do you sing in the shower? I try to get through "Thick As A Brick" each time.
7 - Do you use a washcloth? When I have one, but no. Probably should.
8 - Do you have a door or a curtain on your shower? Curtain in the dorm showers. It's all mouldy and gross.
9 - Have you ever taken a call in the shower? No stall calls.
10 - Have you ever showered in your swimsuit? Can't say as I have.
11 - Have you ever showered with a member of the same sex? I suppose the showers at the swimming pool count, so yes.
12 - Have you ever showered with a member of the opposite sex? That'd be fun...and effecient.
13 - Do you share a bathroom with someone? Yes. Approximately 70 other guys.
14 - Do you listen to the radio in the shower? No, but I should.
15 - Do you wear a shower cap? Nope.
16 - Do you wash behind your ears? Behind my ears, under my balls, crack of my ass...it's an all over cleansing. Nothing quite like being clean all over.
17 - Describe your shower in three words. Stop watching me.
18 - What one thing would you change about your shower? Jeez, where do I start? No black mould would be nice, the harr in the drain is disgusting, and someone keeps taking a dump in one of the stalls. There are toilets literally ten feet away!
19 - What would make your shower time better for you? Not having to look for poop before going in.
20 - What celebrity would you like to shower with? One of the hot ones. Halle Berry is still hot, right?
21 - What celebrity would you NOT like to shower with? John Goodman. *shiver*
22 - What is the one thing you can't do without in your shower? in this case, sandals. You could get god damned flesh eating disease!
23 - What is the oddest thing that has happened to you in the shower? Listening to people fuck in the next stall over...and not be quiet at all.
24 - What is the best thing that has happened to you in the shower? Not a whole lot really happens...when I shower with a pretty girl, that'll be the best.
25 - When was the last time you showered? Yesterday evening.
26 - When are you going to take a shower next? Soon. When the stank eats through my shirt.
Dude or chick? Sausage or clam? Tequito or taco?
General | Posted 16 years agoYou be the judge.
Your man side:
[x] You love hoodies. (mm-mmm good)
[x] You love jeans. (I do, but fitting ones are hard to find)
[x] Dogs are better than cats (woof, motherfucker.)
[x] It's hilarious when people get hurt.
[x] You've played with/against boys on a team.
[x] Shopping is torture.
[ ] Sad movies suck.
[x] You own an X-Box.
[x] Played with Hotwheels cars as a kid.
[ ] At some point in time you wanted to be a firefighter.
[x] You used to be obsessed with Power Rangers. (power rangers rule...)
[ ] You watch sports on TV. (I'd rather play a sport than watch it)
[x] Gory movies are cool.
[x] You go to your dad for advice.
[ ] You own, like, a trillion baseball caps.
[ ] You like going to football games.
[ ] You used to/do collect baseball cards.
[ ] Baggy pants are cool to wear. (Baggy pants are <3)
[ ] It's kind of weird to have sleepovers with a bunch of people.
[x] Green, black, red, blue, or silver are one of your favorite colors. (oh purple all the way baby) (red and black. Booya)
[ ] You love to go crazy and not care what people think.
[x] Sports are fun. (fucking...hell...yeah)
[x] Talk with food in your mouth.
[ ] Wear boxers. (I'm not a big fan of boxers...bikini briefs are nice. They look sexy, and offer support and mobility I've never felt before)
14 points.
Your woman side:
[ ] You wear lip gloss.
[ ] You love to shop.
[ ] You wear eyeliner.
[ ] You have some of the same shirts in different colors.
[ ] You wear the color pink.
[ ] Go to your mom for advice.
[ ] You consider cheerleading a sport. (What? How the hell...)
[ ] You hate wearing the color black.
[ ] You like hanging out at the mall.
[ ] You like getting manicures and/or pedicures.
[ ] You like wearing jewelry.
[ ] Skirts are a big part of your wardrobe. (i only havea couple. sssssh dont tell anyone))
[ ] Shopping is one of your favorite hobbies.
[ ] You don't like the movie Star Wars.
[ ] You are/were in cheerleading, gymnastics or dance. (no, but I wish. Those dudes are hella strong)
[ ] It takes you around 1 hour to shower, get dressed, and put on make-up and accessories. (shower, deoderant, we're good.)
[ ] You smile a lot more than you should. (smile? What the hell is that?)
[ ] You have more than 10 pairs of shoes.
[x] You care about what you look like. (Of course I do. It's important to have good self image)
[ ] You like wearing dresses when you can. (it's a private thing, amigo)
[ ] You like wearing body spray/perfume/cologne. (I shower instead :P)
[x] You wear girl underwear. (who told you?)
[ ] Used to play with dolls as little kid.
[x] Like putting make-up on someone else for the joy of it. (when they're unconcious)
[ ] Like taking pictures of yourself with your cell phone/camera when you're bored.
3 points
Wow, I'm a dude. Whooda thunk it?
Your man side:
[x] You love hoodies. (mm-mmm good)
[x] You love jeans. (I do, but fitting ones are hard to find)
[x] Dogs are better than cats (woof, motherfucker.)
[x] It's hilarious when people get hurt.
[x] You've played with/against boys on a team.
[x] Shopping is torture.
[ ] Sad movies suck.
[x] You own an X-Box.
[x] Played with Hotwheels cars as a kid.
[ ] At some point in time you wanted to be a firefighter.
[x] You used to be obsessed with Power Rangers. (power rangers rule...)
[ ] You watch sports on TV. (I'd rather play a sport than watch it)
[x] Gory movies are cool.
[x] You go to your dad for advice.
[ ] You own, like, a trillion baseball caps.
[ ] You like going to football games.
[ ] You used to/do collect baseball cards.
[ ] Baggy pants are cool to wear. (Baggy pants are <3)
[ ] It's kind of weird to have sleepovers with a bunch of people.
[x] Green, black, red, blue, or silver are one of your favorite colors. (oh purple all the way baby) (red and black. Booya)
[ ] You love to go crazy and not care what people think.
[x] Sports are fun. (fucking...hell...yeah)
[x] Talk with food in your mouth.
[ ] Wear boxers. (I'm not a big fan of boxers...bikini briefs are nice. They look sexy, and offer support and mobility I've never felt before)
14 points.
Your woman side:
[ ] You wear lip gloss.
[ ] You love to shop.
[ ] You wear eyeliner.
[ ] You have some of the same shirts in different colors.
[ ] You wear the color pink.
[ ] Go to your mom for advice.
[ ] You consider cheerleading a sport. (What? How the hell...)
[ ] You hate wearing the color black.
[ ] You like hanging out at the mall.
[ ] You like getting manicures and/or pedicures.
[ ] You like wearing jewelry.
[ ] Skirts are a big part of your wardrobe. (i only havea couple. sssssh dont tell anyone))
[ ] Shopping is one of your favorite hobbies.
[ ] You don't like the movie Star Wars.
[ ] You are/were in cheerleading, gymnastics or dance. (no, but I wish. Those dudes are hella strong)
[ ] It takes you around 1 hour to shower, get dressed, and put on make-up and accessories. (shower, deoderant, we're good.)
[ ] You smile a lot more than you should. (smile? What the hell is that?)
[ ] You have more than 10 pairs of shoes.
[x] You care about what you look like. (Of course I do. It's important to have good self image)
[ ] You like wearing dresses when you can. (it's a private thing, amigo)
[ ] You like wearing body spray/perfume/cologne. (I shower instead :P)
[x] You wear girl underwear. (who told you?)
[ ] Used to play with dolls as little kid.
[x] Like putting make-up on someone else for the joy of it. (when they're unconcious)
[ ] Like taking pictures of yourself with your cell phone/camera when you're bored.
3 points
Wow, I'm a dude. Whooda thunk it?
Valanetine's Day
General | Posted 16 years ago1.Are you single or taken? Single. Poop.
2. Chocolate or flowers? I dunno...you can eat flowers...chocolate flowers?
3. Will you do anything special for Valentines Day? I'm gonna baricade myself in my dorm room with a two four and pretend the blasted day never happened.
4.Do you like anyone? Yeah, but there's someone else...there's always someone else.
5. Were you dating anyone last Valentines? Unh uh.
6. What would be your dream Valentines date? Dream valentine's date? Well, it'd be just swell if Carmen Electra was going out with me.
7. Do you make a big deal about Valentines? I do, but it's not a good one.
8. Have you ever had a secret admirer? Yes, and it's infuriating because I can never tell when it's happening.
9. Would you ever write someone a love letter? Nope.
10. Do you believe in Cupid? Fat baby coming at you with a weapon? Sounds pretty good to me. ^^
11. Do your parents give you presents on Valentines? Yes. That's not sad. (sarcasm)
12. Do you still send out Valentines cards? Like in elementary school? Fuck that noise.
13. Do you like candy hearts? I once got one that said "fuck off."
14. Flowers or chocolate? Woah, deja vu.
15. Is Valentines day depressing? Not with the right amount of alcohol. Or sex. If you have both, that's the bee's knees.
16. How do you feel about PDA? If I'm involved? I'm all for it.
17. How is your love life? Sadly lacking.
18. Have you ever been dumped on Valentines? Never had a date on Valentine's day I couldn't put in my pocket. (masturbation joke ftw.)
19. How many roses would you want? Let's go with one. I like flowers, but they seem to commit suicide around me.
20. Will you have a boyfriend/girlfriend next year? *holds up his crossed fingers* Here's hopin, pal!
Ah Valentine's Day, that glorious day in the frigid cold of the god damned winter that makes you feel all warm and cozy inside...if you have a date. If not, it's just a cold, bitter reminder of how hard the world bootfuck's you every year.
That being said, enjoy your Valentine's Day this year folks; it's a day that you should spend with the ones you love, and hopefully get some February fucking in too. It's sort of like Christmas, except without all the drunk relatives. (I'm usually the drunk one, so it's just like Christmas).
Cheers!
2. Chocolate or flowers? I dunno...you can eat flowers...chocolate flowers?
3. Will you do anything special for Valentines Day? I'm gonna baricade myself in my dorm room with a two four and pretend the blasted day never happened.
4.Do you like anyone? Yeah, but there's someone else...there's always someone else.
5. Were you dating anyone last Valentines? Unh uh.
6. What would be your dream Valentines date? Dream valentine's date? Well, it'd be just swell if Carmen Electra was going out with me.
7. Do you make a big deal about Valentines? I do, but it's not a good one.
8. Have you ever had a secret admirer? Yes, and it's infuriating because I can never tell when it's happening.
9. Would you ever write someone a love letter? Nope.
10. Do you believe in Cupid? Fat baby coming at you with a weapon? Sounds pretty good to me. ^^
11. Do your parents give you presents on Valentines? Yes. That's not sad. (sarcasm)
12. Do you still send out Valentines cards? Like in elementary school? Fuck that noise.
13. Do you like candy hearts? I once got one that said "fuck off."
14. Flowers or chocolate? Woah, deja vu.
15. Is Valentines day depressing? Not with the right amount of alcohol. Or sex. If you have both, that's the bee's knees.
16. How do you feel about PDA? If I'm involved? I'm all for it.
17. How is your love life? Sadly lacking.
18. Have you ever been dumped on Valentines? Never had a date on Valentine's day I couldn't put in my pocket. (masturbation joke ftw.)
19. How many roses would you want? Let's go with one. I like flowers, but they seem to commit suicide around me.
20. Will you have a boyfriend/girlfriend next year? *holds up his crossed fingers* Here's hopin, pal!
Ah Valentine's Day, that glorious day in the frigid cold of the god damned winter that makes you feel all warm and cozy inside...if you have a date. If not, it's just a cold, bitter reminder of how hard the world bootfuck's you every year.
That being said, enjoy your Valentine's Day this year folks; it's a day that you should spend with the ones you love, and hopefully get some February fucking in too. It's sort of like Christmas, except without all the drunk relatives. (I'm usually the drunk one, so it's just like Christmas).
Cheers!
Write stories in six words. Go!
General | Posted 16 years agoSo it's said that Ernest Hemingway was told to write a story in exactly six words. What he came up with is the following - "For sale. Baby shoes. Never worn."
So I extend the challenge out to you. Write, in exactly six words, the following.
a) Your autobiography
b) Your love life
c) A story
Here goes;
My autobiography- Big family, big people, big deal.
My love life- Fish can't whistle, neither can I.
A story- Reality; left passport in Fantasy. Whoops.
It's not great, but it was fun to do, especially while drunk and tired. I did it, you should too!
So I extend the challenge out to you. Write, in exactly six words, the following.
a) Your autobiography
b) Your love life
c) A story
Here goes;
My autobiography- Big family, big people, big deal.
My love life- Fish can't whistle, neither can I.
A story- Reality; left passport in Fantasy. Whoops.
It's not great, but it was fun to do, especially while drunk and tired. I did it, you should too!
Just something I'd like to share.
General | Posted 17 years agoRelationships don't work, the way they do in television and in the movies; will they, won't they, then they finally do and they're happy forever, give me a break...nine out of ten of 'em end because they weren't right for each other to begin with and, half the ones that get married get divorced anyway, and I'm telling you right now through all this stuff I have not become a cynic, I haven't. Yes, I do happen to believe that love is mainly about pushing chocolate covered candies and, y'know, in some cultures, a chicken...but you can call me a sucker, I don't care...cuz I do, believe in it. Bottom line, it's couples who are truly right for each other that wade through the same crap as everybody else, but the big difference is they don't let it take 'em down...one of those two people will stand up and fight for that relationship every time, if it's right and they're real lucky...one of 'em will say something.
Dr. Perry Cox, "Scrubs"
This is just a little quote that I thought I'd like to share with you all.
Believe it, don't believe it, it doesn't really matter in the end.
Dr. Perry Cox, "Scrubs"
This is just a little quote that I thought I'd like to share with you all.
Believe it, don't believe it, it doesn't really matter in the end.
Favourite Christmas Movies
General | Posted 17 years agoIt's coming to be that time of year again, where the family will gather around the Yule Log and watch it smoulder (in my family, the Yule Log is any bit of wood that we can find. Last christmas it was the actual tree, and a few years ago it was my uncle's wooden leg. Thank god for liquor and eggnog.), a time of giving and recieving, fellowship among men, and that warm fuzzy feeling from the general spirit of the season. I'm not entirely sure if this extends into other holidays such as Channukah, Kwanza or Ramadan (I'm not entirely certain about the spelling on that one, but at least it's closer than how I pronounce it. "Rama-dama-ding-dong.)
There is, however, one ever lasting constant brought to us by the guys in the film industry, and that is the Christmas movies. These are a few that I would heartily recomend to anyone wishing to start the season right.
Nightmare Before Christmas
This film by Tim Burton takes a slightly macabre take on the holiday, which many people (myself included) thoroughly enjoyed. There's something about watching a man with the same approximate body proportions as a European supermodel dance around a village singing to himself while his cohorts back home stuff severed limbs into boxes to send to said villagers.
A Wonderful Life
Oh yeah, the Jimmy Stewart classic. Who could forget those wonderful (albeit slightly hard to understand) words "Every time a bell rings, an angel gets his wings." I rather liked this one, at least the part that's reminiscent of Back To The Future part II, where Jimmy/Marty stumble about a discordant Gulag, all the while getting nearly run down by cars, drunks, and prostitutes. Nothing says Christmas like "Hey sailor, feeling lucky?"
How The Grinch Stole Christmas
Bear in mind, that I'm referring to the early cartoon version of Dr Seuss phd's story, not the Jim Carrey film, which was equally humourous but for different reasons. The cartoon played like an acid trip, with bell hoopers and flung flounders going off in every part of my clack clunker. Upon later viewings of this movie, I realized just how similar it is to heist movies, such as Ocean's Eleven, The Italian Job, and The Thomas Crown Affair (the latter being the most relevant because he actually gives the stuff back at the end). Although I suppose some of the thrills of those works might have diminished slightly if Matt Damon and Elliot Goulde were stealing millions worth of styrofoam from Whoville...but I'd still go and see it.
Die Hard
I know what you're thinking. "Wait a minute, Die Hard? The shoot 'em up action movie starring Bruce Willis, Alan Rickman (still using his british accent) and the dude that played Ellis? That's no christmas movie!" Well, it takes place on Christmas, at a Christmas party, and John MacLain got a machine gun, ho ho ho. So yes, it is in fact a Christmas movie. This was the first one in the series of four, and the one that had us all saying "yipee ki yay mother fucker" for years after. Guns, C4, white people falling from the sky and more awesome one liners than 007 could have ever hoped for? Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow...
There is, however, one ever lasting constant brought to us by the guys in the film industry, and that is the Christmas movies. These are a few that I would heartily recomend to anyone wishing to start the season right.
Nightmare Before Christmas
This film by Tim Burton takes a slightly macabre take on the holiday, which many people (myself included) thoroughly enjoyed. There's something about watching a man with the same approximate body proportions as a European supermodel dance around a village singing to himself while his cohorts back home stuff severed limbs into boxes to send to said villagers.
A Wonderful Life
Oh yeah, the Jimmy Stewart classic. Who could forget those wonderful (albeit slightly hard to understand) words "Every time a bell rings, an angel gets his wings." I rather liked this one, at least the part that's reminiscent of Back To The Future part II, where Jimmy/Marty stumble about a discordant Gulag, all the while getting nearly run down by cars, drunks, and prostitutes. Nothing says Christmas like "Hey sailor, feeling lucky?"
How The Grinch Stole Christmas
Bear in mind, that I'm referring to the early cartoon version of Dr Seuss phd's story, not the Jim Carrey film, which was equally humourous but for different reasons. The cartoon played like an acid trip, with bell hoopers and flung flounders going off in every part of my clack clunker. Upon later viewings of this movie, I realized just how similar it is to heist movies, such as Ocean's Eleven, The Italian Job, and The Thomas Crown Affair (the latter being the most relevant because he actually gives the stuff back at the end). Although I suppose some of the thrills of those works might have diminished slightly if Matt Damon and Elliot Goulde were stealing millions worth of styrofoam from Whoville...but I'd still go and see it.
Die Hard
I know what you're thinking. "Wait a minute, Die Hard? The shoot 'em up action movie starring Bruce Willis, Alan Rickman (still using his british accent) and the dude that played Ellis? That's no christmas movie!" Well, it takes place on Christmas, at a Christmas party, and John MacLain got a machine gun, ho ho ho. So yes, it is in fact a Christmas movie. This was the first one in the series of four, and the one that had us all saying "yipee ki yay mother fucker" for years after. Guns, C4, white people falling from the sky and more awesome one liners than 007 could have ever hoped for? Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow...
Corgi, you're the only one that's even gonna recieve this.
General | Posted 17 years ago[01] Do you have the guts to answer these questions and re-post as The Controversial Survey?
I have the guts to answer them, do you have the guts to read them? Of course you do, shush.
[02] Would you do meth if it was legalized?
Legalized? No. Illegalized? Still no.
[03] Abortion: for or against it?
Sure, why not? Women's bodies are their own freakin' business. That being said, while I do think that abortion is okay <bold> in certain circumstances </bold>, I do not think it should be used as a method of birth control. For something like rape victims or incest, sure go ahead. But if you're too cheap/lazy to use birth control (but not cheap/lazy enough to go get the little spawn sucked out of you, never really figured that out), then you're stuck with them. Welcome to earth ya little schmuck.
[04] Do you think the world would fail with a female president?
Probably not. I don't really believe that any woman could or would ever let this crap happen. Well, maybe for one or two days...but then it'd be all business and that nonsense.
...what? Don't look at me like that. I'm a misanthrope, not a bloody misogynist.
[05] Do you believe in the death penalty?
They bring the convict into the chamber, they kill him, kinda hard not to believe in. I mean, it's not like Santa Claus or God...oh wait, did you mean whether it's moral or not? Of course I believe in it. There are certain people who simply do not deserve to live. Then there are others who should be incarcerated along with a mandatory steralization so they may never sew their seed on the earth.
[06] Do you wish marijuana would be legalized already?
Sure. If it was, it would be just the same as alcohol. It was fun before it was legal (like how drinking was fun when you were young, but now that it's legal, it's all blah), but then it would just sort of dissolve into the ether. Just make certain that proper precautions are taken, education about it, and scary ass propaganda.
[07] Are you for or against premarital sex?
I'm not for it, I'm not against it. It's one of those things that doesn't really affect me.
[08] Do you believe in God?
Nope. I believe in Jesus, the prophet Mohammed, Lao Tzu, Buhdda, etc. I believe they were all good, smart people that jus wanted their people to find a better way of living, but their disciples were nincompoops who misquoted them and took their words out of context. I do not believe in the big giant invisible man in the sky that can see everthing (be he named God, Yahweh, Allah or whatever), and that's my opinion.
[09] Do you think same sex marriage should be legalized?
Of course. But wouldn't the same sex every night get boring and repetitive? (I kid, I kid) Yeah, the fact that it isn't just shows how far behind we are as a people.
[10] Do you think it's wrong that so many Hispanics are illegally moving to the USA?
Not at all. If anything, we have to do something about all the Mexicans coming across the border without going through customs.
[11] A twelve year old girl has a baby, should she keep it?
What the hell is a twelve year old doing with a baby?!
[12] Should the alcohol age be lowered to eighteen?
It is eighteen. God save the queen and Oh Canada, muthafuggah! ^^
[13] Should the war in Iraq be called off?
It's gone on for too long, it's a forgotten cause. Get out of there.
[14] Assisted suicide is illegal: do you agree?
If you want something done right, you have to do it yourself.
[15] Do you believe in spanking your children?
Oh god yes. I was spanked as a child, and I never once thought twice about it. Mind you, I was never beaten. If I was being naughty or, for lack of a better term, "bad", I got hauled over whatever parent was there, and got my ass smacked right in public. It's painful, humiliating, and at that age, it taught me if I didn't want that to happen again, just shut up and do as your told.
[16] Would you burn an American flag for a million dollars?
Sure I would. Then I'd use some of the money to buy some more american flags. What's the problem here?
[17] Who do you think would make a better president? McCain or Obama?
Hmmm...honestly, I don't know. McCain scares the crap out of me, and as for Obama...well, not to wish the man any harm, but if he does become president, it's very likely that he'll be assassinated. Think about it, black democrat. Nah, that shit doesn't fly down there. But even so, he seems like a guy who gets things done.
[18] Are you afraid others will judge you from reading some of your answers?
Not at all.
[19] The President has been kidnapped by NINJAS! Are you a bad enough dude to rescue the President??
Fuck that, call John McLain.
I have the guts to answer them, do you have the guts to read them? Of course you do, shush.
[02] Would you do meth if it was legalized?
Legalized? No. Illegalized? Still no.
[03] Abortion: for or against it?
Sure, why not? Women's bodies are their own freakin' business. That being said, while I do think that abortion is okay <bold> in certain circumstances </bold>, I do not think it should be used as a method of birth control. For something like rape victims or incest, sure go ahead. But if you're too cheap/lazy to use birth control (but not cheap/lazy enough to go get the little spawn sucked out of you, never really figured that out), then you're stuck with them. Welcome to earth ya little schmuck.
[04] Do you think the world would fail with a female president?
Probably not. I don't really believe that any woman could or would ever let this crap happen. Well, maybe for one or two days...but then it'd be all business and that nonsense.
...what? Don't look at me like that. I'm a misanthrope, not a bloody misogynist.
[05] Do you believe in the death penalty?
They bring the convict into the chamber, they kill him, kinda hard not to believe in. I mean, it's not like Santa Claus or God...oh wait, did you mean whether it's moral or not? Of course I believe in it. There are certain people who simply do not deserve to live. Then there are others who should be incarcerated along with a mandatory steralization so they may never sew their seed on the earth.
[06] Do you wish marijuana would be legalized already?
Sure. If it was, it would be just the same as alcohol. It was fun before it was legal (like how drinking was fun when you were young, but now that it's legal, it's all blah), but then it would just sort of dissolve into the ether. Just make certain that proper precautions are taken, education about it, and scary ass propaganda.
[07] Are you for or against premarital sex?
I'm not for it, I'm not against it. It's one of those things that doesn't really affect me.
[08] Do you believe in God?
Nope. I believe in Jesus, the prophet Mohammed, Lao Tzu, Buhdda, etc. I believe they were all good, smart people that jus wanted their people to find a better way of living, but their disciples were nincompoops who misquoted them and took their words out of context. I do not believe in the big giant invisible man in the sky that can see everthing (be he named God, Yahweh, Allah or whatever), and that's my opinion.
[09] Do you think same sex marriage should be legalized?
Of course. But wouldn't the same sex every night get boring and repetitive? (I kid, I kid) Yeah, the fact that it isn't just shows how far behind we are as a people.
[10] Do you think it's wrong that so many Hispanics are illegally moving to the USA?
Not at all. If anything, we have to do something about all the Mexicans coming across the border without going through customs.
[11] A twelve year old girl has a baby, should she keep it?
What the hell is a twelve year old doing with a baby?!
[12] Should the alcohol age be lowered to eighteen?
It is eighteen. God save the queen and Oh Canada, muthafuggah! ^^
[13] Should the war in Iraq be called off?
It's gone on for too long, it's a forgotten cause. Get out of there.
[14] Assisted suicide is illegal: do you agree?
If you want something done right, you have to do it yourself.
[15] Do you believe in spanking your children?
Oh god yes. I was spanked as a child, and I never once thought twice about it. Mind you, I was never beaten. If I was being naughty or, for lack of a better term, "bad", I got hauled over whatever parent was there, and got my ass smacked right in public. It's painful, humiliating, and at that age, it taught me if I didn't want that to happen again, just shut up and do as your told.
[16] Would you burn an American flag for a million dollars?
Sure I would. Then I'd use some of the money to buy some more american flags. What's the problem here?
[17] Who do you think would make a better president? McCain or Obama?
Hmmm...honestly, I don't know. McCain scares the crap out of me, and as for Obama...well, not to wish the man any harm, but if he does become president, it's very likely that he'll be assassinated. Think about it, black democrat. Nah, that shit doesn't fly down there. But even so, he seems like a guy who gets things done.
[18] Are you afraid others will judge you from reading some of your answers?
Not at all.
[19] The President has been kidnapped by NINJAS! Are you a bad enough dude to rescue the President??
Fuck that, call John McLain.
No Subject
General | Posted 17 years agoLevel 1
(x) Smoked A Cigarette
( ) Smoked A Cigar
( ) Kissed A Member Of The Same Sex
SO FAR: 1
Level 2
( ) Are / Been In Love
( ) Dumped someone
( ) Been Fired
(x) Been In A Fist Fight
SO FAR: 2
Level 3
( ) Had A Crush On An Older Person
(x) Skipped Class
( ) Slept With A Co-worker
( ) Seen Someone / Something Die
SO FAR: 3
Level 4
( ) Had / Have A Crush On One Of Your Furaffinity Friends
( ) Been To Paris
( ) Been To Spain
(x) Been On A Plane
(x) Thrown Up From Drinking
SO FAR: 5
Level 5
(x) Eaten Sushi
(x) Been Snowboarding
( ) Met Someone Through Internet
( ) Been in a Mosh Pit
SO FAR: 7
Level 6
( ) Been In An Abusive Relationship
(x) Taken Pain Killers
(x) Liked/loved Someone Who You Cant Have
(x) Laid On Your Back And Watched Cloud Shapes Go By
(x) Made A Snow Angel
SO FAR: 11
Level 7
( ) Had A Tea Party
(x) Flown A Kite
(x) Built A Sand Castle
(x) Gone mudding
( ) Played Dress Up
SO FAR: 14
Level 8
(x) Jumped Into A Pile Of Leaves
(x) Gone Sledding
( ) Cheated While Playing A Game
(x) Been Lonely
(x) Fallen Asleep At Work / School
SO far: 18
Level 10
(x) Watched The Sun Set
( ) Felt An Earthquake
( ) Killed A Snake
SO FAR: 19
Level 11
(x) Been Tickled
(x) Been Robbed / Vandalized
(x) Been cheated on
(x) Been Misunderstood
SO FAR: 23
Level 12
(x) Won A Contest
( ) Been Suspended From School
(x) Had Detention
( ) Been In A Car / Motorcycle Accident
SO FAR: 25
Level 13
( ) Had / Have Braces
( ) Eaten a whole pint of ice cream in one night
(x) Danced in the moonlight
SO FAR : 26
Level 14
(x) Hated The Way You Look
(x) Witnessed A Crime
( ) Pole Danced
( ) Questioned Your Heart
( ) Been obsessed with post-it-notes
SO FAR: 28
Level 15
(x) Squished Barefoot Through The Mud
( ) Been To The Opposite Side Of The World
(x) Swam In The Ocean
( ) Felt Like You Were Dying
SO FAR: 30
Level 16
(x) Cried Yourself To Sleep
(x) Played Cops And Robbers
( ) Recently Colored With Crayons / Colored Pencils / Markers
(x) Sang Karaoke
(x) Paid For A Meal With Only Coins
SO FAR: 34
Level 17
(x) Done Something You Told Yourself You Wouldn't
( ) Made Prank Phone Calls
(x) Laughed Until Some Kind Of Beverage Came Out Of Your Nose
( ) Kissed In The Rain
SO FAR: 36
Level 18
(x) Written A Letter To Santa Claus
( ) Watched The Sun Set/ sun rise With Someone You Care/Cared About
(x) Blown Bubbles
(x) Made A Bonfire On The Beach Or Anywhere
SO FAR: 39
Level 19
( ) Crashed A Party
(x) Have Traveled More Than 5 Days With A Car Full Of People
( ) Had A Wish Come True
( ) Been Humped By A Monkey
SO FAR: 40
Level 20
( ) Worn Pearls
( ) Jumped Off A Bridge
(x) Screamed "Penis" or "Vagina"
( ) Swam With Dolphins
SO FAR: 41
Level 21
( ) Got Your Tongue Stuck To A Pole/Freezer/ice Cubes
( ) Kicked A Fish (WAT?)
(x) Worn The Opposite Sex's Clothes
(x) Sat On A Roof Top and watched the stars
SO FAR: 43
Level 22
(x) Screamed At The Top Of Your Lungs
(x) Done / Attempted A One-Handed Cartwheel
( ) Talked On The Phone For More Than 6 Hours
( ) Recently stayed up for a while talking to someone you care about
SO FAR: 45
Level 23
(x) Picked And Ate An Apple Right Off The Tree
(x) Climbed A Tree
(x) Had/Been In A Tree House
(x) Been scared To Watch Scary Movies Alone
SO FAR: 49
Level 24
(x) Believed In Ghosts
( ) Have had More Then 30 Pairs Of Shoes
( ) Gone Streaking
( ) Visited Jail
SO FAR: 50
Level 25
( ) Played Chinese Chicken
(x) Been Pushed into a pool with all your clothes on
(x) Been Told You're Hot By A Complete Stranger
( ) Broken A Bone
(x) Been Easily Amused
SO FAR: 53
Level 26
(x) Caught A Fish Then Ate It Later
( ) Made A Porn Video/got asked to make one
( ) Caught A Butterfly
(x) Laughed So Hard You Cried
( ) Cried So Hard You Laughed
SO FAR: 55
Level 27
(x) Mooned/Flashed Someone
(x) Had Someone Moon/Flash You
( ) Cheated On A Test
(x) Forgotten Someone's Name
( ) French Braided Someones Hair
(x) Gone Skinny Dipping (Hot tub counts!)
(x) Been Kicked Out Of Your House
SO FAR: 60
Level 28
(x) Rode A Roller Coaster
( ) Went Scuba-Diving/Snorkeling
(x) Had A Cavity
( ) Black-Mailed Someone
( ) Been Black Mailed
SO FAR: 62
Level 29
(x) Been Used
(x) Fell Going Up The Stairs
( ) Licked A Cat
( ) Bitten Someone
( ) Licked Someone
SO FAR: 64
Level 30
( ) Been shot at/or at gunpoint
( ) Had sex in the rain
( ) Flattened someones tires
(x) Rode in a car/truck until the gas light came on
(x) Got five dollars or less worth of gas
TOTAL: 66
Congratulations, you are an idiot.
Repost this with the title:
I've Done __ of the 120 stupidest things. (with your total in that blank spot.)
I gotta say, I haven't done a few of the things on this list, but now that I've read it, I have a whole new itinerary to accomplish by the end of the year.
(x) Smoked A Cigarette
( ) Smoked A Cigar
( ) Kissed A Member Of The Same Sex
SO FAR: 1
Level 2
( ) Are / Been In Love
( ) Dumped someone
( ) Been Fired
(x) Been In A Fist Fight
SO FAR: 2
Level 3
( ) Had A Crush On An Older Person
(x) Skipped Class
( ) Slept With A Co-worker
( ) Seen Someone / Something Die
SO FAR: 3
Level 4
( ) Had / Have A Crush On One Of Your Furaffinity Friends
( ) Been To Paris
( ) Been To Spain
(x) Been On A Plane
(x) Thrown Up From Drinking
SO FAR: 5
Level 5
(x) Eaten Sushi
(x) Been Snowboarding
( ) Met Someone Through Internet
( ) Been in a Mosh Pit
SO FAR: 7
Level 6
( ) Been In An Abusive Relationship
(x) Taken Pain Killers
(x) Liked/loved Someone Who You Cant Have
(x) Laid On Your Back And Watched Cloud Shapes Go By
(x) Made A Snow Angel
SO FAR: 11
Level 7
( ) Had A Tea Party
(x) Flown A Kite
(x) Built A Sand Castle
(x) Gone mudding
( ) Played Dress Up
SO FAR: 14
Level 8
(x) Jumped Into A Pile Of Leaves
(x) Gone Sledding
( ) Cheated While Playing A Game
(x) Been Lonely
(x) Fallen Asleep At Work / School
SO far: 18
Level 10
(x) Watched The Sun Set
( ) Felt An Earthquake
( ) Killed A Snake
SO FAR: 19
Level 11
(x) Been Tickled
(x) Been Robbed / Vandalized
(x) Been cheated on
(x) Been Misunderstood
SO FAR: 23
Level 12
(x) Won A Contest
( ) Been Suspended From School
(x) Had Detention
( ) Been In A Car / Motorcycle Accident
SO FAR: 25
Level 13
( ) Had / Have Braces
( ) Eaten a whole pint of ice cream in one night
(x) Danced in the moonlight
SO FAR : 26
Level 14
(x) Hated The Way You Look
(x) Witnessed A Crime
( ) Pole Danced
( ) Questioned Your Heart
( ) Been obsessed with post-it-notes
SO FAR: 28
Level 15
(x) Squished Barefoot Through The Mud
( ) Been To The Opposite Side Of The World
(x) Swam In The Ocean
( ) Felt Like You Were Dying
SO FAR: 30
Level 16
(x) Cried Yourself To Sleep
(x) Played Cops And Robbers
( ) Recently Colored With Crayons / Colored Pencils / Markers
(x) Sang Karaoke
(x) Paid For A Meal With Only Coins
SO FAR: 34
Level 17
(x) Done Something You Told Yourself You Wouldn't
( ) Made Prank Phone Calls
(x) Laughed Until Some Kind Of Beverage Came Out Of Your Nose
( ) Kissed In The Rain
SO FAR: 36
Level 18
(x) Written A Letter To Santa Claus
( ) Watched The Sun Set/ sun rise With Someone You Care/Cared About
(x) Blown Bubbles
(x) Made A Bonfire On The Beach Or Anywhere
SO FAR: 39
Level 19
( ) Crashed A Party
(x) Have Traveled More Than 5 Days With A Car Full Of People
( ) Had A Wish Come True
( ) Been Humped By A Monkey
SO FAR: 40
Level 20
( ) Worn Pearls
( ) Jumped Off A Bridge
(x) Screamed "Penis" or "Vagina"
( ) Swam With Dolphins
SO FAR: 41
Level 21
( ) Got Your Tongue Stuck To A Pole/Freezer/ice Cubes
( ) Kicked A Fish (WAT?)
(x) Worn The Opposite Sex's Clothes
(x) Sat On A Roof Top and watched the stars
SO FAR: 43
Level 22
(x) Screamed At The Top Of Your Lungs
(x) Done / Attempted A One-Handed Cartwheel
( ) Talked On The Phone For More Than 6 Hours
( ) Recently stayed up for a while talking to someone you care about
SO FAR: 45
Level 23
(x) Picked And Ate An Apple Right Off The Tree
(x) Climbed A Tree
(x) Had/Been In A Tree House
(x) Been scared To Watch Scary Movies Alone
SO FAR: 49
Level 24
(x) Believed In Ghosts
( ) Have had More Then 30 Pairs Of Shoes
( ) Gone Streaking
( ) Visited Jail
SO FAR: 50
Level 25
( ) Played Chinese Chicken
(x) Been Pushed into a pool with all your clothes on
(x) Been Told You're Hot By A Complete Stranger
( ) Broken A Bone
(x) Been Easily Amused
SO FAR: 53
Level 26
(x) Caught A Fish Then Ate It Later
( ) Made A Porn Video/got asked to make one
( ) Caught A Butterfly
(x) Laughed So Hard You Cried
( ) Cried So Hard You Laughed
SO FAR: 55
Level 27
(x) Mooned/Flashed Someone
(x) Had Someone Moon/Flash You
( ) Cheated On A Test
(x) Forgotten Someone's Name
( ) French Braided Someones Hair
(x) Gone Skinny Dipping (Hot tub counts!)
(x) Been Kicked Out Of Your House
SO FAR: 60
Level 28
(x) Rode A Roller Coaster
( ) Went Scuba-Diving/Snorkeling
(x) Had A Cavity
( ) Black-Mailed Someone
( ) Been Black Mailed
SO FAR: 62
Level 29
(x) Been Used
(x) Fell Going Up The Stairs
( ) Licked A Cat
( ) Bitten Someone
( ) Licked Someone
SO FAR: 64
Level 30
( ) Been shot at/or at gunpoint
( ) Had sex in the rain
( ) Flattened someones tires
(x) Rode in a car/truck until the gas light came on
(x) Got five dollars or less worth of gas
TOTAL: 66
Congratulations, you are an idiot.
Repost this with the title:
I've Done __ of the 120 stupidest things. (with your total in that blank spot.)
I gotta say, I haven't done a few of the things on this list, but now that I've read it, I have a whole new itinerary to accomplish by the end of the year.
