Again, courtesy of our friends at # http://www.cracked.com/article_19317_7-pieces-good-news-nobody-reporting.html

http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-things-nobody-tells-you-about-being-poor/?wa_user1=3&wa_user2=Weird+World&wa_user3=blog&wa_user4=popular

...yeah, so...news flash: we're all fucked. Still, knowledge means knowing what to avoid, right?

I will say, reading this DOES go a long way towards explaining why grown men are playing with "My Little Pony" toys these days.

http://www.arthousecoop.com/project.....tchbookproject

Might be a way to pry my art block loose, all things considered. Thoughts?

So...Ryan and I saw DOTM on Wednesday. Gotta say, you want perspective, see Bay's TF movies with an actual kid. That said, even he asked me if the movie accidentally skipped the ending (it's called denouement, look it up). Still, all-in-all, it was leagues better than ROTF (which, all told, STILL isn't as bad as people say...not GOOD by any stretch, but not "worst film EVAH" level, but that's another rant), which I suppose would put it around "Armageddon" level.

It still looks like a bad car commercial half the time, still way too much time with the puny fleshlings (even if they actually HAD a purpose in this one and filled it nicely), still so many gaps in logic you expected the movie itself to implode like Cybertron did at the end. The beginning totally dragged on, but once Sentinel pulled his face-heel turn things picked up big time. Kudos for not TOTALLY spoiling that twist, BTW...at least I wasn't aware of it before I saw it, but then, I was avoiding all previous advertisement for that very reason.

Part of the problem is that there were SO MANY lapses in logic that listing them all would take forever; they just sort of collectively dragged the movie down, but, fortunately, "Rule of Cool" was straining its muscles to hold the sagging narrative aloft. Even more irritating was the reams of unanswered questions and occasional outright contradictions withing the story, from little things like why Ironhide crumbled into dust when Sentinel killed him when NONE of the other killed Cybertronians ever have (and don't bother pointing out stuff like "Maybe Sentinel invented Cosmic Rust?" because if he had, why was it never called out as such, why did nobody react any differently to I-hide's crumbling than they did to the other deaths, why did he never use it against any of the other Autobots he fought, etc.) to big stuff like, oh, a FRIGGIN' GIANT PLANET MADE OF METAL appearing in the Earth's vicinity yet having no effect on the planet even when it TURNED ITSELF INSIDE OUT (even the G1 cartoon knew that Cybertron being even partially in Earth's orbit would cause massive environmental upheavals...Megatron was counting on it to harvest Energon, remember?), that made it difficult to "turn off my brain and just enjoy the spectacle" like the Bay-philes say. I'm even willing to give the plot MacGuffin of the "war-ending weapon" being a space bridge, something which was shown in ROTF to be technology even an elderly barely-functioning Decepticon (the faction OPPOSING Sentinel back the thousands of years between their arrival on earth and him first striking the bargain with the 'cons in the 60s) had, a pass.

Basically, the impression I get is that the very thing holding the movie back is the very premise of the series: the Transformers themselves. If Bay had been making yet another "alien invasion repelled by AMURR'CANS" movie like we've been getting shoved down our throats the past couple of years, it would have been spot-on, but trying to divert time from his beloved military set-pieces and quirky stereotypes to the giant shape-shifting robots everybody came to see in the first place was throwing off his game.

Still, at the risk of damning with faint praise, DOTM is worth seeing, even in 3D (I didn't get the "best 3D since Cameron" vibe from it, but then that might BE the hallmark of really GOOD 3D, it DOESN'T get in the way of the movie). It's a fun if disappointing end to the Bayformer Trilogy, and a nice capper on that storyline to boot, much like finally seeing a bad fanfic come to an end. Now, we just wait to see who handles the (...suppress the rage...) franchise reboot in a couple of years.

Really? REALLY?! YOU MALADJUSTED EGOMANIACAL FUCKWADS ARE SO EMOTIONALLY DECREPIT AS TO ACTUALLY COIN A TERM FOR PEOPLE HAVING THE COLOSSAL GALL OF +FAV-ING A BUNCH OF PICS AT ONCE WITHOUT COMMENTING LIKE IT WAS A BAD THING? "OH, HOW DARE YOU INCONSIDERATE SHITS SHOW ME HOW MUCH YOU LIKE MY WORK BY +FAV-NG IT WITHOUT STOPPING TO POST 'COOL PIC BRO' DESPITE KNOWING I'LL STILL MOCK YOU!"

YOU FUCKING HIPSTER DOUCHEWADS! GET OFF THE FUCKING INTERNET! WE DON'T WANT YOU ANYMORE, GO PEDDLE YOUR BULLSHIT AT FUCKING STARBUCKS.

Hey, I keep seeing pics mentioning "Wing It" and "Iron Artist" pics. Er...what are those?

What most may or may not know is that I am a HUGE fan of Channel Awesome/ThatGuyWithTheGlasses.com, particularly their movie reviewers. Well, a couple of days ago, one of my faves, Phelous (http://thatguywiththeglasses.com/videolinks/teamt/phelous ), did a review outside his normal "crap horror movies" domain of a fairly recent "art" movie called, innocuously enough, "A Serbian Film." I'm normally of a very open mind about many things, but this movie..."horror and disgust" doesn't scratch the surface. When a scene involving snuff porn is one of the lighter moments..? It was an especially horrifying film for fathers like myself for reasons I do not want to go into...suffice it to say, even my hard-line defending of artistic expression is strained badly by this movie. I SERIOUSLY wanna read the production team's explanation as to how this thing is actually a statement about the atrocities that have been inflicted on the Serbian people, other than a possible checklist of them...

...which is when I realized something: it DID horrify me. I am not as blase' or corrupt as I thought I was. I may have looser standards than most, but they're STILL THERE. And even a badly dented moral compass is still more than some people possess.

It reminded me of why one of my prior therapists defended my underage porn art, beyond repeatedly reminding me that it was just drawings: she pointed out that the one common thread in all of them, even the rare pieces that did feature adults interacting with (read "fucking") them, was that the kids were always the ones in control of the situation. Even the most "controversial" one with Kim and the Dorat Triplets, the adult was the one being fucked; the girls were seducing HIM, right down to Shuko being perched on his back and goading him on. She went on to explain that right there was the key to why, no matter what I may believe about myself and my upbringing, I did not possess the mindset of a child molester or, indeed, any sort of sexual predator: I actually am more concerned with the participant's pleasure than my own (the words she used were "In my professional opinion, you'd probably kill yourself rather than harm any child, in spite of what you think about yourself").

She also explained that that was a large part of why I was trapped in a loveless marriage that she correctly predicted would end within the year, but I wasn't prepared to hear THAT either, it seems...

So, basically, I'm just saying that...after that near suicidal rant in the last journal, I'm feeling better now. Really. Aside from having more horrible cinema images littering my memory, at least; oh well, they can hang out with the ones left over from Phelous' review of "The Human Centipede"...*shudder*

FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU...how come every single time I put my fucking pencil to paper, all I get are either shitty half-assed static posed or FUCKING PORN? It's not even porn I'm allowed to fucking post anywhere, fucking teenage/lolita lesbian stuff that I've been trying to STOP drawing because it's NOT what I want my fucking name associated with for the rest of my Goddamn life! I'm trying to actually HAVER a future here, not end up on a fucking FBI list or getting buttrammed by prisoners because of how everyone keeps calling my shit CP and at this rate, I'm gonna end up on a fucking "Dateline" special or at the least having every single fucking legitimate project I ever attempt ending up springing up fucking "hey, guess what THIS guy used to draw, fucking pedo-pervert!" like I was Dave Cheung or something. I mean, it's fucking pictures of fucking robots and dragongirls and all I wanna do is try and make some kinda future for myself because I have NOTHING to look forward to but a lifetime of physical pain and lonliness anyway but all I'm doing is ruining any fucking chance I have at being seen as anything but a pathetic Internet pervert for the rest of my life! FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCK!

....I'm fucking crying here. I just want something to not make me wanna kill myself over, is that too much to fucking ask for? Is it?

So...for YEARS people have been bugging me to "finish" my pics. Fine...where do I go to actually learn how to use these programs and such? I don't mean colleges and stuff; first off, there is NO PLACE locally I can go, and secondly there are literally THOUSANDS of self-taught artists with shit drawing skills churning out otherwise professional-quality art AS A FUCKING HOBBY. They have to be picking this shit up somewhere, so where can I go to learn, too?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PVu949oYnXg&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jeZnmwjTF2A&feature=player_embedded

I am happy.

http://www.comicsalliance.com/2011/.....lashpoint-map/

DC released a map of the Earth in "Flashpoint" and, apparently, there is a HUGE uproar over the depiction of Africa as "Ape-Controlled" in reference to the continent being ruled by Gorilla Grodd. Apparently, this is racist.

...huh?

I'm not black...as I used to joke in the now apparently far-less PC 90s, I'm so white I oppress myself...but of ALL the racist-seeming things DC has done in the past few years, of all the off-color, misogynistic crap in "Flashpoint" alone, this has GOT to be the least intentional. I mean, seriously, am I truly dense about this, because it smacks of "looking for something to complain about" to me.

I've lived in Redneck-ville down the road from a major Navajo reservation for 7 years now. EVERYBODY is a racist here on ALL sides of the color barrier. Please, feel free to correct me or give me your insight.

Not that I'm actually drawing again, really, but does anyone have any recommendations for a free aft program I could use? My old crack of PSP went down with my old lappy.

http://www.comicsalliance.com/2011/.....ok-fans-sales/

Gimme some thoughts, folks.

So, yeah...I reactivated my Steam account and now have Garry's Mod. Any recommendations for a n00b to go to start learning how to use it?

I should have known you were only just fifteen
You had a scowl like a Klingon beauty queen
Old enough to stand out but too young to stand with pride
So uncomfortable in your messed-up skin
And the cool parties never let you in
I can still relate to being left so high and dry
Don’t cry
You’re just at an awkward age


We’ll all be fine
Disgraceful under pressure
Don’t tow the line
You’re just at an awkward age
Don’t cry - you’re just at an awkward age
Don’t cry
You’re just at an awkward...


You look at me like I know what’s going on
I’m looking back and I wonder what went wrong
I really thought by now a few things might just clarify
I got a mind that goes out to lunch for days
And a body that sometimes disobeys
I get into the parties but I hate them 'cause I'm shy
O h my
I’m still at an awkward age


We’ll all be fine
Disgraceful under pressure
Don’t tow the line
You’re just at an awkward age
Don’t cry - you’re just at an awkward age
Don’t cry
You’re just at an awkward...


We’re supposed to be happy
Supposed to be tough
Supposed to be flawless
And buy the right stuff
They want us all swimming
Don’t care if we drown
So don’t let them take you down
It’s a scary mountain to climb up without a guide
Besides...
We live in an awkward age


We’ll all be fine
Disgraceful under pressure
Don’t tow the line
You’re just at an awkward age
Don’t cry - you’re just at an awkward age
Don’t cry
You’re just at an awkward...

http://dcwomenkickingass.tumblr.com.....#disqus_thread

Is Cassandra Cain evil again?

DCWKA is pretty pissed off about this, but I posted there as I now do here that I still have faith in Fabian Nicieza that this is just a swerve to get Cass back into the spotlight...and that I have enough faith in the guy who used to promote "New Warriors" WITH HIS OWN DAMN MONEY BECAUSE MARVEL REFUSED TO that if, by the end of the storyline, Cassandra Cain isn't back in good standing with the Bat-Family, I will post a photo of me burning my copies of "Deadpool: The Circle Chase" online.

I'm cross-posting this promise so that I will be held to this. DON'T let me down, Fabian.

I will say one thing about having myself convinced I'd be dead by 2012, at least then I had some rudimentary idea of what to do with my life (namely "end it"). Now that I've decided to go on living, I'm kinda stuck with an idea of what the Hell to DO with that life...I mean, my childhood dreams of working in comics or as a professional animator are completely shot to fuck and back by the harsh economic realities and evolutions of both industries. Seriously, I think the kindest thing I can say about wasting my life pursuing a woman who claims to have never loved me is that if I hadn't, odds are I'd STILL be up shit creek career-wise.

But...writing and drawing are all I've ever done. I sidelined into computers to support that cheap mockery of a marriage and have palsied hands and out-of-date computer skills to show for it. My ex is trying to convince me to go back to college, but for what? These days, college degrees are as likely to PREVENT you from getting jobs as HELP you, and it's not like a friggin' English major is worth jack shit these days.

So, just to keep from talking myself back INTO suicide, does anyone have any ideas what a gimpy 37-year-old waste of space can do to make a future for himself?

http://herorecon.lego.com/en-us/hero-creator/
Make your own Hero factory set and get it shipped to you...I hate that BIONICLE was canceled, but the new HF 2.0 system kicks ASS, and getting to custom make figs with it (and get parts for customizing with it) takes a lot of the sting away.

Huh...anyone who knows me knows I've been agonizing for years over the fact that, in the current political climate, much of my previous lolicon artwork is now considered child pornography by most of the major countries of the world. In fact, I agonize over that SO much that it's a large contributor, if not the PRIMARY contributor, to my long-running art block, despite the assurances of many, including two professional therapists, that I am in fact NOT a child molester in waiting; one therapist even went so far as to point out to me after she perused some of my work that the primary theme of even my smuttiest stuff seemed to be the "empowerment of the girls' awakening sexuality, rather than the exploitation of it," even complimenting me on the fact that, even in the rare pic that DID involve an adult, the younger characters were ALWAYS, without fail, the ones in control of the situation. Hell, she even pointed out how Maisy, an unintentional expy of me right down to her own past sexual "abuse," even reversed many of the standard roles by taking advantage of the older characters' over-the-top porno exploits while fiercely guarding and shepherding the younger girls into their own sexualities.

...does that make Maisy a cross between Hugh Hefner, X-J9, and "The Catcher in The Rye" then? Weird.

At any rate, despite these reassurances of my own innocence, I'm still paralyzed with fear due to the downright DISTURBINGLY rapid reversal of the previous public opinions on the subject, especially in light of my own story exploring the themes my therapist had mentioned, at her encouragement, resulting in the Academy story I mentioned before that ended up dangerously close to a reader's manual on how to circumvent CP laws. For a then-newly divorced male trying to keep an active role in his son's life, this is NOT a good thing to be trying to build a future on, and the fact that I didn't realize this, followed by the sudden seeming explosion of indictments to others for merely possessing works that, superficially anyway, resembled the stuff I'd been writing and drawing about, is the crux of my fears. Bad enough I could get persecuted or even arrested for it, so could any of my fucking FANS.

Which brings me to "Night Animals," a newly released graphic novella by critically-beloved Belgian cartoonist Brecht Evans, sold by Top Shelf Productions ( http://www.topshelfcomix.com/catalo.....ht-animals/649 ). While hardly porno, if IS labeled as adult work in several places, primarily due to the second story in it, "Bad Friends," about a young girl's embarrassment over her first period and the resulting surreal "Where The Wild Things Are" trip she ends up on because of it. Hell, the cover even has her naked on it, in the midst of the partying monsters celebrating her "becoming a woman."

So, my question is...why is THIS okay with people?

I'm not saying it SHOULDN'T be okay...HELL, no. I'm just wondering WHY it is. Is it because the art is so unrealistic and cartoony? She's just as naked as any of the girls I drew, after all, and the theme IS regarding a young girl's awakening sexuality. So, what makes THIS a beloved story (Comics Alliance has it on this week's "Don't Ask, Just Buy It" list, even) instead of child pornography? If the artist posted pages from it in a deviantArt or FurAffinity account, would it be taken down for underage nudity, or does critical acclaim somehow validate work that would otherwise be condemned?

And, most importantly, if that IS the case...then why shouldn't my work be as well? Am I reading too much of a connection between my art and the loli-porn being increasingly banned worldwide, or is my stuff more like this comic and Alan Moore's similarly-themed if far more explicit (yet equally beloved and acclaimed) "Lost Girls," in subject matter if not quality (I'm not so brazen as to compare myself to one of the modern masters of comic literature...not yet, anyway...)? And, then, why or why not?

Am I being properly cautious, or am I damning myself needlessly? Please, give me your thoughts.

Crossposted from TKT:

http://www.toplessrobot.com/2011/03.....ments.php#more

Holy FUCKNUGGETS...I am putting this here instead of WST because most of you whippersnappers aren't old enough to remember that not only did MTV once stand for "MUSIC Television," but they also used to be the home of "Liquid Television," a half-hour program that for years was the ONLY place to find animation that wasn't shit. You know a couple of its spin-offs, "Aeon Flux" and "Frog Baseball," the latter being the birthplace of Beavis and Butthead, and the show was kinda hit-or-miss at times, but I can honestly say that this show was the spark of what would eventually become the Animation Renaissance.

You wanna know why "CN Real" pisses me off so much? Because I remember when this was ALL we had.

Sorry about the lack of response to the previous journal comments (and the couple of notes sent to me regarding it). I've...got a lot to ruminate on regarding a couple of the points brought up, but the outpouring of support is...well, thank you. Thank you all.

What bring me to this journal is, at the very least, a possible idea of WHAT exactly is wrong with me. Yeah, I know, self diagnosis is a bad idea, but the similarities in both symptoms AND causes are striking and, at the very least, the therapy apparently involves training rather than drugs, so bonus for me.

http://www.palace.net/llama/psych/bpd.html

http://www.palace.net/llama/psych/dbt.html

Sorry. Normally I'd have a more private place to unload my cosmic angsting but they recently restructured and, in the process, I've apparently not been invited back there. Quel suprize', I think the term is..."What a surprise." I hate unloading in public, especially in a place supposedly for drawing people in to look at my GOOD stuff, but since I have nowhere else and, frankly, I tend to feel better afterward anyway...

So, going on two months off of the Cymbalta and, while the "brain zapps" have mostly stopped, it's sort of a mixed bag. While I stand by my decision to kick the stuff, it seems that what it was primarily doing, aside from making my chronic pain actually bearable, was dulling my emotions. So, basically, I'm STILL near-suicidally depressed, but I'm also really, REALLY PISSED OFF about everything...which, considering my high blood pressure and the increasingly apparent fact that not only has my neurochemical acrobatics this year completely killed my previously overclocked metabolism (I'm actually getting FAT now...to say that it's unsettling is something of an understatement), but it's apparently done a number on my heart to boot (my chest never stops hurting now, usually a dull echoey throb except on those rare occasions I'm not pissed off or depressed), is not good.

Not that I can actually afford to DO anything about it: I still haven't heard from my doctor about whether she actually followed up on what she said she was going to do, since the incompetent receptionists at the psychiatrists' office are incapable of handling even the slightest task. I was supposed to be put on "suicide watch," meaning someone from the office was supposed to call me at least once a week to make sure I' you know, didn't kill myself...no one has called, and when I called to leave a message for my doctor (and to polite remind them that they were supposed to be keeping me from eating a bullet), I was rudely told by the bitch on the line that she'd "bring it up at the staff meeting next Monday"...and that was two weeks ago. SO, yeah...and without that additional money, I can't afford to go to the doctor to get checked out, much less afford the "animal companion" I was prescribed to reduce my stress levels and, hopefully, keep me sane.

Meanwhile, my ex is planning for the five-week class in Spain that her Pell Grant, the same one I didn't get because I'm adult, white, and male, is paying for.

It's been like waking from a bad dream to find out that reality is worse. Part of me wants to go back on the drugs...if I'm doomed, I may as well not feel it, right?..but, y'know, if there IS any hope that I'm gonna pull out of this, I need to be able to see it and act on it, not fucking sleepwalk like I have been. It's just...I've gone from all-consuming depression to a little depression and all-consuming RAGE. All I seem to feel anymore is this unrelenting ANGER at how rotten my life has been, like an unending self-pity trip that I WANT off but EVERY train of thought I have leads back to it, like a toothache that slowly fills up your brain until it becomes your entire world...and, coincidentally, the constant, chronic body pain isn't helping in that, either. I almost want to go back on the Cymbalta because over-the-counter pain meds aren't cutting it anymore.

Even worse, I'm so frustrated about not being able to GET FUCKING ON WITH MY LIFE that it just feeds into the anger and makes things worse. Even my old trick of reminding myself of how many people out there have it so much worse than me, like fucking BILLIONS of people who would give their souls to be in my Hell instead of theirs, doesn't help anymore. It's almost feeling like paranoia sometimes, like the entire universe is geared towards grinding me down to a fucking nub, like my entire life exists for no reason except to see if someone who's basically decent can be turned into a monster...worse, the knowledge about how bad so many other people have it just makes me even more terrified to do anything because if I'm having this much trouble NOW, what about if things get WORSE?

It's like my soul is trying to pull free and I'm just stuck in this fucking loop. And that's not even getting into the gender issues...nothing like basing your entire identity on what you thought was fact and having it turn out you were completely WRONG.

Ffffffuuuu...OK, fuck it all, I may as well explain, since this was something I kept to myself and those at the "other place" I mentioned at the beginning of this rant: see, I've always had...issues with being male. Like I never thought I was supposed to BE one; all my life, looking in the mirror was like looking at a stranger, and all my efforts to be more "masculine" ended up total failures (except Ryan, but more on him later). Thing is, I never was able to put my finger on WHY I felt so off...I mean, I'm NOT gay, it's not that I find men particularly...OK, they're gross. I REALLY don't like looking at naked men, myself included. WHICH is what confused me: how could I be "a woman trapped in a man's body" if I was still straight? I always would just joke it off as being a lesbian trapped in a man's body...ha-ha, everybody laugh, right? My last therapist even diagnosed me as "clinically misandrist" due to this and my past problems with males, completely ignoring that I've had just as many issues with females. Turns out, THIS was where my facts were so off: about a year after the separation, a TG friend of mine online who, up to that point, actually thought I WAS female, pointed out to me that many male-to-female TGs start out lesbian and, after transitioning, most of them even STAY that way.

So, yeah...it turns out there was a perfectly "logical" reason for my lifetime of "never feeling like a male" all along, as it is, which solves one ongoing life issue...and uncorks a whole bunch of brand new ones. The whole reason I'm STAYING here is because I'm trying to be the kind of dad for Ryan that my own wasn't, to be a role model for him outside of the gun-toting, beer-swilling redneck fuckwads that populate this town...Hell, it's the only thing that's kept me from killing myself. The ONLY thing. How can I be a positive role model AND be true to myself?

That's not even TOUCHING on the normal issues a TG person (and I can't shake the feeling I'm getting the terminology wrong) has to face; I mean, there's a reason I've waited THIS long to come out to you people here, and I'm still expecting flames from all corners. Like I said before, I'm terrified, because if I'm having this many problems with my life as-is, what about if I come out to the world at large? TGs are, as a rule, DESPISED by what I've seen; every Day of Remembrance story I read feels like an indictment, like I should hide myself in, well, a closet and never show my face in public. I'm afraid to get to know people IRL because I can't handle being betrayed AGAIN...and what if I do come out? I'm 37 years old, over 6 feet tall, and balding. Yeah, I'll TOTALLY fool the public into believing I'm a woman...fuck, I can barely even make car payments, how am I going to even CONSIDER gender counseling, much less make any sort of transition, when I can't even afford a real therapist for my other issues? And if I thought I was lonely before, how about having the ENTIRE FUCKING WORLD hating my ass for trying to be what I feel I should be but aren't? I doubt even the BEST plastic surgeons could make me a passable woman...Hell, they'd be hard-pressed to make me a halfway decent looking MALE, and I already HAVE all THOSE parts.

I don't know what to do. About ANYTHING. I despise looking at myself in the mirror for so many reasons, gender-based and not, and everything just feels so...big. Too big. Like it'll never get any better EVER...any of it. I don't want to feel this way, but I can't find a way out of any of it, and now my health is failing. I won't commit suicide, I'm sure of that...fuck, I'm too stubborn for that. It's not a solution anyway, just doing like my ex does and running from the problem.

I want to say "Help!"...but I have no one I can think of to say it to, and what could they do anyway? It's all on me...and God help me, I don't know what to do.

This will only be posted here, not at my deviantArt gallery. My family goes to that gallery, and I'm...not ready for THEM to know this. Any of this.

http://www.keezmovies.com/video/eve.....monster-617610

Er, yeah...this is kinda like fursuit porn, ain't it? At least the girl is cute...

First, a quick update: my state refund ended up arriving early, too, so I now have money for food and at least one important expense, so that's a relief. Still no scanner yet, but we'll see.

So, like I mentioned, I bought myself DCU Online and a Lifetime subscription since they were available and pretty reasonably priced, too. There are some definite problems, as expected of a new game, and after the INSANE depth of the CoX customization tools, the limitations of DCUO are damned frustrating. Seriously, no lightning/electricity powers in the universe of Captain Marvel? The game designers were clever enough to incorporate several of those limitations into the meta-origin of the game, though, since the "exobytes" that give all the PCs their powers are limited to those of the major DCU heroes and villains; while the CoX backstory is limited enough to get the Hell out of the players' way, the DCUO one says "THIS is where your powers come from, at least for now. Suck it up."

Also, the costuming is both more and less flexible than CoX's: you start out with a limited number of various gear and appearances, but you can modify them on the fly from the beginning, unlike CoX's "You can have anything you want, but you're stuck with it until you can get to the tailors and/or unlock your other costume slots." The DCUO system is much like switching armor in WoW, only you can pick your look based on whatever "styles" you've unlocked...Hell, you can even switch your skin type, like from metal to fur or whatever (it's just kinda expensive to buy the new skin types), but there are only three builds per gender (Small, Medium, or Large, literally) and you're pretty much stuck with the general color scheme you started out with.

So, yeah...here my snarky ass was, preparing to bitch and moan about this game when a funny thing happened:

Superman told me he was glad to have me on his side.

SUPERMAN. TOLD ME. HE WAS GLAD TO HAVE ME ON HIS SIDE.

Dude.

I geeked out. My little robot girl character, Wardoll (not TECHNICALLY Maisy, but similar in spirit; this one was apparently a piece of Apokaliptian tech that got absorbed into Braniac's Harvester ship and, in turn, absorbed an exobyte, gained a familiar sentience, and decided to leg it to Gotham initially...if you're ever on "Virtue and Vice" US server and you see a shiny Goth chick in black pigtails fly by, say hi), totally got wet at that. Hell, I totally got wet at that...even Batman seemed to be less annoyed at my toon than expected.

Not ALL of the VAs fit...I still can't hear Wonder Woman's voice without wondering where Wash and Jayne are...and some aren't that good, but Kevin Conroy as Bats and Mark Hamill as Joker (plus they got the guy who did DCAU Braniac to reprise the role here), and, for all the magic-users in the DCU, they still had to saddle those who shose Wondy as their mentor with a bunch of lame generics "Sentinels of Magic" instead of, well, any magic user other than Zatanna? And they couldn't put her zone anywhere other than Metropolis' Chinatown district? They could've used Gateway City or even Boston...plus side, though, you can easily zip back and forth between her and Superman's zones.

Still, it was damn cool saving Raven and the Titans from Trigon (Wardoll bounced around all three zones) and fighting the Scarecrow alongside Batwoman (and I got his hat as a souvenir!)...which is where the games primary appeal lies. Which is cooler, having Statesman or Manticore tell you you rock, or having Superman and Batman do it?

So...fun, surprisingly addictive game, especially since I don't ever have to pay for it again.