Hey y’all! A long time ago I made a journal asking for your birthdays so I could do sketch gifts for people. Well, it’s been (checks notes) 11 whole years since then and lots of the accounts there are no longer active or have moved, etc. So I’m making a new one!

Leave a comment with your birth day and month (don’t need the year) and a reference to the character(s) you’d like drawn. I’ll do my best to keep up with these this time and pick a few monthly, if not one big collab.

These are so much fun and I hope to surprise some of you!

I just noticed that some time ago I started mis-numbering my commissions. I should be in the 400s instead of just breaking 300. Uh oh.

Now I have to decide if I feel like going back and renumbering all of them. Ughhh.....

EDIT:
Just went ahead and did it. Wasn't that bad, most tedious part was having to add keywords to some of them, cuz I always forget, lol!

That's it. That's the update. So go check out the >YCH Master List< and see if there's anything you like. Claim one by commenting on the respective post, or sending a note, or commenting here. Really, there's no wrong way to reach out!

I've also updated the Porn Trope YCHs; they're no longer auctions but have a set price.

Just popping in real quick to give an update on the "Danger" YCH, and general life stuff.

The YCH is about done. I'm just finishing up the shading on part 2 and they'll be ready to post. Not much longer yet, I promise! Admittedly part of what made it take so long was changing my mind about what I wanted to do for the part 2, so I might just make a self-indulgent part 3 later, lol.

As for life? Well, y'know. It's been......*something*, hasn't it? It's been a lot. I haven't been dealing with it all that well, bringing out my anxiety and insecurity, but I'm trying my best to give myself grace. It's just so fucking much, isn't it?

How are you doing?

Just realized my last journal was about losing my job, which feels like forever ago with the way this crazy year has been. Needed an update.

First and foremost, I did find another job. Nothing extravagant, but I like it well enough.

Secondly, planning into the next SoL chapter. Well, sorta. That pretty much fell completely to the wayside, basically because I couldn't decide which chapter to do next. I ended up dropping one, just cuz the idea was already a stretch but really because it no longer appealed to me. So it's really down to a couple ideas. Two of them are definitely yesses because they close out the series, but then it's just figuring out the rest before then. I'm probably making it way more complicated than it needs to be.

Had a birthday recently, the big 3-9. No big goals to speak of.

I'm on BlueSky now, though haven't posted anything. I'm getting a feel for the place before I start putting art there. But add me if you want, I'm Houkuko there as well.

No idea what the point of this journal was. I guess I just wanted to ramble for a little bit. I thought I'd have more to say about the year, but it's been almost too hectic to point any one thing out. Does anyone else feel that way?

Lost my job yesterday. The entire team was let go, and I think the company is going down as well. It was a little startup, so it's not unheard of, but still it sucks. Wasn't the best, I was bored most of the time, but it was nice to have income.

That being said, commissions are open. The YCHs are still up, and I'll be going back into planning the next SoL chapter full-swing.

I was gonna draw something to wish everyone a happy 420,

But then....

Hey y'all! I finally found a job and am starting this coming Monday. Just in time, after six months and my UIB running out. It's not perfect by any means, but it'll keep the bills paid while I'm moving up.

So as much as I've enjoyed pumping out multiple pics a day for the last YCH batch, I'm naturally gonna have less time now. But I'll still be working hard to get commissions and things out in a timely manner.

Also, the next chapter of Spice of Life is entering the writing phase. This one's gonna be..... a bit weird haha, but hopefully it'll tick a lot of boxes in terms of what people have been asking to see.

I've also reactivated my commission tab to make price searching a little easier.

That's all I got for now. Hope everyone's having a good time, and for those in the viewing range I hope the eclipse is awesome!

Seeking out some feedback and opinions here. I was looking through some of my older stuff, specifically the stuff I did about 5-6 years ago, and I noticed I really liked how almost everything turned out. It was to the point of having the line of thought "I wish what I did now looked like that."

I don't know if it's that the quality of my work has declined for some reason, or if I'm just being a harsh critic and looking back with enough time passed that I can say it looks better than I thought it did then. I also know I was way more active back then, and the type of things I did were different, so maybe I wasn't rusty as much as I find I am now. I dunno.

What do y'all think? Do you see a change for the worse in my more recent art, or am I being hard on myself?

Yes, commissions are open! Sketches, flats, fashion sheets? You want 'em, and I got 'em!

You can submit a request through my Artistree Form or send me a note with your details. The Artistree form has my prices as well, so be sure to check that out either way.

And as always, if you're ever unsure of what to get, check out my YCH master list and grab one of those! The prices and details on those are up-to-date, but feel free to ask any questions.

My computer is fixed! It needed a new motherboard, as suspected, so Rye helped me out with that and a few necessary upgrades for compatibility and whatnot. I want to sincerely thank everyone who got a commission or donated funds to help pay for everything. I didn't have to break the bank on this and I'm so grateful.

So I'm back in the flow of things! I worked on drafts where I could on my ipad, so I should be able to get into the swing pretty quick. If there are any further problems or delays for anyone in particular I will reach out.

Also a quick update on the next chapter of Spice of Life; I'm almost done with the script so I hope to begin active draft work on that pretty soon after this batch of commissions is done. Still deciding if I want to do a Patreon or something for it, I just want to be sure I can deliver something worthwhile. If anyone has suggestions I'd be really appreciative.

Thank you everyone again!

My PC has gone tits up, motherboard fried.

I'm jobless right now so getting a new one is pretty much out of my budget as it stands right this moment.

So if anyone has been wanting a commission, now's the time! I'm doing 15% off to encourage you, even. You can make a request or get a YCH from the links on my userpage, or if you just wanna throw a couple bucks my way my ko-fi is there as well.

Comment here with any questions on prices or logistics. Thank you!!

[EDIT] Naturally I wouldn't be able to start working on things right away, until I get the new parts for my computer, but I'm hoping the delay will only be a week or 2. And in the meantime I still have my phone and iPad to communicate and work on draft sketches. So no worries on sending a request into the ether and never getting it done. I promise commissions will be priority once things get rolling.

October's over halfway over and there's still plenty of slots left for my Kinktober! Get yours today, see HERE for the list and details!

I'd really love to do a Kinktober challenge, or something like it, of commissions or like another YCH thing. I don't know if I could hold myself to it daily, but I'd like to offer something up for people to get something they'd like for the season anyway.

I was thinking if I do it, I'd come up with my own list (unless there's something "official" out there somewhere), and maybe mix it up by doing it as something that looks like a manga, or b&w comic with screentones and such. Just do try something different and practice some technique for the upcoming new chapter of SoL.

Would there be any interest? I might still do another YCH either way, but more just gauging how extensive the interest is.

It's been a wild summer, y'all. Boy howdy.

I started a new job, failed spectacularly at it, and now am trying to get my old job back. It was stressful as all hell, left me with no energy at all to draw or work on any projects. Wrecked my physical and mental health. I'm almost grateful to be jobless right now.

Commissions are open, needless to say! There's a link to my Artistree on my userpage, or you can note me here. There's also all the old YCHs too (https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/8969748/) I'd like to do more of. They're cheap, and if y'all can spare the coin I'd really appreciate the work, since things are pretty slim right now.

Rye and I got married in June. That's been nice. It's funny that people keep asking if the relationship is any different, and my answer has been that the only difference is people asking about the relationship way more often now. I mean after 18 years not much can change, right?

Getting back in touch with my sister. It'd been near 10 years since we saw each other but we've had some talks the last few months that cleared the air and we're building back a good relationship. That's been very special to me.

I dunno how much of this is important, I'm just rambling. In the early planning stages for the next Spice of Life chapter, which is weird because I almost feel like I've forgotten how to script stuff out, it's been so long. But it's hopefully coming before the end of the year. I want to try and build a backlog of pages so I can keep on a schedule this time and not as much of a "whenever I finish I finish" sort of thing. Not really fair to y'all. I'm also thinking of making it a Patreon thing, but I dunno.

Just a little update. Hope everyone is well. How have your summers been?

Howdy Y'all!

I won't bore you all to death with apologies for the delay or boring life updates (it's actually pretty exciting but I'll get into all that in a different post) and just jump right in to tell everyone that commissions are finally open!!

I'm not using the note or comment system here anymore as I'm sorta consolidating commissions through a few different places, so instead I ask that you use my Artistree link >>here<< to make requests.

Fair warning; it's not entirely set up with every bit of info I'd like, and there's a few new types of commission types I'll add soon (isometric environment pics) as well as a few I'm gathering examples of before I list them (reference and fashion sheets). The prices have also changed. BUT! Don't let that discourage you as everything is negotiable. If something you want isn't listed or if you have any questions before you send in an official request, feel free to ask here. Also this is my first time using Artistree, so please let me know if there are any issues or if it makes the commission process difficult. I'll happily find another way to talk with you if need be.

[EDIT] Updates have been made to the pricing info, sorry I left out details and ended up making the price ranges seem really daunting. A classic case of "I knew what I meant in my own brain but forget that not everyone else does!" To break it down, I'm going by a time system now rather than "things" in the image (extra characters and so forth), but it will still follow that - for example - if you have 1 character in an image it will be that minimum cost, but up to 4 and a background will be the max.

So this shouldn't impact anything to the "upload schedule" (as loose a term as there can be for it) for TTB but I still felt it was good form to let folks know what's been going on.

I've been having some pretty weird health things cropping up in the last little while. Between lower intestinal issues, a day in the hospital with cardiac episodes and exhaustion, and now recently sudden bouts of nausea and barfing, my Autumn is shaping up to be quite interesting indeed. Even greater is that of the doctors I've been to there's been no definitive explanation for any of it. Just blood tests and body scans and "we can't find anything that would cause this." So my body's just falling apart I guess, WHEEEEEEE.

Not meaning to worry anyone, all things considered I'm feeling OK and still functioning day-to-day just fine. I've been able to mostly stay on track with things (sitting and drawing isn't a terribly strenuous activity after all) and have been taking time off to get into some crafting projects (I'm making tiny houses) so I doubt any problems have been obvious, but like I said it seemed like the right thing to do in case something changes so it's not coming out of nowhere.

Just wanted to drop a quick message to everyone, and give some apologies for the recent delays on new pages. I know I don't really have a promised upload schedule per se but I had I good consistency going for a bit there that has faltered.

Basically there's been a line of small things that have piled up enough to become one big thing, between Rye having covid and taking care of him, to some ridiculousness at my job taking the will to live out of me, to changes in my ADHD/BPD meds doing the exact opposite of helping, to some other medical things involving possible biopsies and tubes in rather unfortunate locations. But the road is starting to even out and things are looking up. Rye's back to about 80% normal, I'm looking for a new job, just started a new med regimen that seems like it'll work better, and as frustrated as I am to have to wait till August for doctor stuff, we still likely caught it early enough to be very manageable if not totally treatable.

Trying to keep the optimism up instead of defaulting to imagining the worst possible scenario. After all that's only one option out of many, so I have probability on my side. Yay math!

Hopefully will get back on track soon, maybe even be able to get the next page out this weekend, but will absolutely let everyone know if there's any other changes. Behave yourselves in the meantime! <3

Yes, it's finally time!

I wanted to get this all started about a month ago but I took a break between a short bit of travel and then as a souvenir a killer respiratory infection. Not covid, but still a doozy, it's still kicking around in my lungs weeks later. But I'm feeling well enough to have gotten back to work, so yay!

The Rules:
So frankly, this is gonna be a bit of a free-for-all. There are 20 spots available total, and I'm going to assign everyone randomly. There's no cost, and you can claim a spot by posting a link to your character's reference in the comments (no notes, comments in one place is transparent and easier to keep track of), and leave any extra info I might need as well. The story takes place in a modern setting, so if your character is fantastical I will accept them but I may have to change some things to make them fit into the world. When you claim a spot I'll reply with a number 1-20 to let you know I've got it (and so others can see how many there are), and when it reaches 20 I'll cut it off. Spots will be open for a week (last day is March 19). If I get more than 20 I'll try to find places to squeeze a few more in but no guarantees (if I get less than 20 I'll fill the extra spots with random OCs).

IMPORTANT: Most of the spots are for adult-themed things (not explicit, but not kid-friendly either), so please bear that in mind if you volunteer a character.

Thank you in advance to anyone who participates! Let's get the party started!!

EDIT: Thank you so much everyone for jumping in! Sorry for the delay in response (some family things going on that required unexpected legal things and it's been a headache), I'm getting everything organized now and am nearly done with page one and can start getting things out. Super excited about this one, can't wait to share the story. Keep your eyes peeled in the next few days!

So a few of you already know, but for those that don't I'm making an official announcement that I'm stepping away from commissions. Likely long-term, with the exception being YCHs or simple things on case-by-case basis (as in, no more slots or batches). I said the same thing at the beginning of the year, but then the pandemic started and I didn't know what was going on with my job, so I reopened just to get some trickle of income should I end up without work. But things have settled and I'm feeling safe in my situation again, so I'm re-hiatusing, so to speak.

You've probably noticed I haven't posted much at all in the last several months, and to my commissioners and inquirers I'm very sorry about that. But the title says it all. It's been fucking HARD to keep the drive and mindset fit for creative work. I can't say it's anything more special than what most people in my country are going through, but the last few months have taken a really steep toll on me. I've lost people I love, to various aspects of the chaos going on here. I'm backsliding from a lot of the progress I've made in therapy, in a really deep depressive episode the likes of which I haven't felt since childhood, when I was being actively abused and exploited. I'm not in any danger and I don't want anyone to worry, I intend to get through this, I'm just trying to explain.

I have to focus on me. I've loved doing commissions, I really have. But they've gotten to the point for me where I'm starting to see them as work that I *have* to do, instead of wanting to. I don't want that kind of resentment to take root in my art so I have to draw that line. Despite everything that's happening I'm in a point where I know I need to start working on the things I want to do, because if I've learned one thing from all this is that you don't know how much time you have. I've put projects on hold for a decade because I didn't have the confidence to take them on, but now I do, and I need to do them in order to not hate myself further than I already do. Because I don't have all the time in the world. I don't have time to waste on garbage thoughts anymore, I have to get better, and that means making the things I've wanted to make forever, just for myself and because I want to.

Art won't stop. I will still be posting, and I plan on continuing the projects I've been working on (yes, the Spice of Life series) and all commissions still in progress will be finished, or if you've messaged me to inquire about a piece and are still interested, please let me know. And always feel free to ask for some art or grab a YCH from the Master List link on my front page (there's tons left and I hate leaving things unfinished), but just understand if I decline or take a while. But new things will happen too. Better things.

Love you all, love each other.

A really weird part of dealing with having a friend/mentor die from covid-19 is that there's really no way for me to talk about it or openly mourn without someone turning it into a political statement. It's the nature of this particular beast, I understand that, and I do have my feelings on those aspects of the situation, but it's also just death like it's always been. It's no different, and I just want to be sad normally, I want to process without walking on conspiratorial eggshells. Without mockery in one respect or another, people throwing wild accusations and theories, and terrible assumptions about this person based on no information or ignorant biases. I want his family to be able to share the stories of his life like they're supposed to, without this awful cloud hanging over them. Without demands for evidence, notions of sacrifice, or claims of justification. I can't imagine how this feels for his wife and sons, I hope I never find out.

It's really strange that this might be the best place for me to talk about it because, frankly, this place doesn't really intersect with my "real" life too heavily, so it's much easier to brush the bullshit aside and not have it impact me all that much. Also because I wanted to give a notice to people who've commissioned me recently or have sent me notes that I haven't answered, to let you know this is why. I'll get to it in my time.

However you do with such things, spare a thought for Patrick. Take care of each other.

I never draw fanart anymore and want to revisit that a bit. Send me a bunch and I'll pick the most requested/ones I like best. XD

So, I feel like I should say what's been going on but it's not much of an update when it's something pretty much everyone's going through. Hard to be like, "You'll never guess what's up with me!" these days. I guess if it's anything, Rye is recovering well from his surgery, he should have his final follow-up and be done with active recovery next week (though we're not sure if it's safe to visit his doctor right now to give us an official word on his status, so we're circling that right now). But he's been up and about, walking and sitting just fine. Still some soreness and painful movement, but that's to be expected when the muscles are just freshly healed, and before then weren't used properly because it hurt too much. Still a little numbness in his legs, but numbness is way better than pain, and it's to be expected that there would be some nerve damage considering how many years this had been going on. But we're approaching the other side of that hurdle, so that's great news!

Otherwise...well, you know. I'm 3 days into a furlough (work for a bank processor so we were still working as essential until someone in our office tested positive, so they closed us down for at least 2 weeks) and just that's been enough time for my brain to jump right back into bad thinking habits. Loss of a sense of control = instant depression and hair-trigger panic. I'm not in any immediate self-induced danger, trying to remain optimistic, or at least even-minded. But the whole situation is grinding my mind really badly. Thank Dog for my meds, I don't know how I'd get by otherwise. Just trying to occupy my time with drawing, picking back up on projects (and commissions if anyone is interested of course), and working through a list of movies with Rye. I think I'm gonna make him watch 'Tangled' tonight.

In the meantime though, please send suggestions for fanart! I think it'll be fun!

As the title says (and as I'm sure some have noticed from my few recent posts) my hiatus is over. I'm opening commissions again, sorta urgently if I'm being honest.

The situation is this; we'd known Rye was going to need spine surgery for a while. He's had severe pain in his back and numbness in his legs for the last few years due to herniated discs, and in the last year it's gotten debilitating. He was in a bad place for a while but finally started seeing doctors for it, and 2 weeks ago had some imaging and such done and confirmed the extent of the damage, and they scheduled him for surgery a few days later. Not emergency surgery, but that was the only time the surgeon would have been available for the rest of the year. And we weren't sure if Rye's mental health could handle waiting much longer so we decided to go for it, and he had surgery last week. He's recovering OK, has a few more weeks before he can be up and about, but pain is already subsiding and we're feeling optimistic about the future.

Now, here's where I'm needing to open for commissions and come out of hiatus. Luckily he has decent insurance through his work, so the major bills will mostly be taken care of. But there's a lot of extra things he's needed; medications, basic medical care items, and a few apparatuses to help him function around the house while his movement is limited. And the sudden-ness of it all has sapped our accounts pretty hard. So I'm needing to open up again, not really for emergency commissions, but still fairly urgent commissions.

So everything's open again! I think I'd encourage the leftover YCHs (see link to master list) because I can get those done quickly. And it bugs me to have a huge list of things still floating around unused. But I'd be happy to take anything else. So please let me know! I'm excited to be doing things for you guys again, I've actually missed it. Just send a note or leave a comment here (on on the relevant YCH post, you know the drill), and I'll get you started in the queue.

So today was my first day feeling normal after a several-days-long anxiety attack, and thank goodness for that because IT'S MUH BERTHDAY wooooooooooooo

Seems appropriate then that I can make my Official Hiatus Announcement. I've completed commissions and my slate is totally clean, so I'm gonna be taking a break from that for a little while. I've kept it open for small things and the existing YCHs just to keep it fresh and I love you guys too much to turn everything away, but I'm gonna be setting my attention mostly to the long-term projects I've had sitting around unattended forever. Along with the stuff you guys know I've been working on, this will hopefully include all new comic stories, models, and animations. I have so much I've been wanting to do but had myself convinced I wasn't ready for, or good enough for, but I've made strides in confidence and recovery, gotten on a medicinal regimen that seems to be working for me so far, and I've reached a point where I'm feeling like I can take this on. It's an exciting time.

So it's been on my mind lately and I'm deciding to go ahead and make it known; After my current batch is done, I'm gonna be taking a light break from solely-commission work to take some time to work on personal projects. I want to sit and get Spice of Life rolling again and try some new art things. Some "real" comics with other stories I've been holding on to, and start doing more than just dabbling in animation and 3D modeling, and actually learning it for real. I'll still be posting art and working on stuff, and I'll never be completely closed because I love doing stuff for people too much, lol. But I'm gonna limit the commissions I take on to the existing YCHs and simple things. As it goes I'll make a more concrete "official" announcement, but just wanted to say something here while it was in my mind. It's just about time, y'know? I've had projects waiting in the wings for years, and I'm finally at a mentally stable enough place where I can actually sit and work on it and feel confident enough to try.

So that's that. Nothing major but still wanted to talk about it.