Mid pleasures and palaces though we may roam,
Be it ever so humble, there is no place like home.

Happy days, happy days.

Now, to plan for the year ahead, move into the basement, and start typing random stuff!

...of course, gotta fix my parent's deck... fun times ahead! Maybe I'll find some peace and quiet to read all the books I snagged while away.

Been working since Tuesday, and will be working until Friday, and then Saturday and Sunday will be spent coating two pergolas and a deck with wood finishing. For free. Sort of. I don't spend much on room and board (read: none at all), so I figure I can lend my expertise to earn my stay by helping out.

The plan is, by Monday, August 13th, I will be on a plane en route to Victoria.

Home.

And then I'll have lots of other stuff to do, such as prepare for the upcoming semesters (procrastinate), and get reaquainted with my friends (Get piss drunk in a bar somewhere). But, I should have a respite, meaning I can focus on the things I want to do! Things such as: absolutely nothing. Nothing at all! Nothing at all! ~Nothing~at~all~!

This Summer has been... glorious. Lost some weight, (roughly 10-20 pounds or so!), gained some muscle, and lots of life experience, everything from hammering a screw, to BDSM 101, and lots in between! Succesfully cooked dinner for the household, visited the local museums, attended a pretty damn awesome convention... why does it have to end? Reality is calling, the Summer has been fun, but all good things must come to an end, and life will press on!

I'M BROWSING FA @ WORK AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME!!!1!one!

Condition Blue was a great success! Had lots of fun, met cool people, bought tons of crap, wasted three hundred dollars on charity, and even commissioned two pictures!

Ended up taking the bus, the train schedules just didn't fit mine, bit of a pity, trains are what tied our great nation from coast to coast, and now it's all about the Greyhounds and the airbuses and non railroaded forms of locomotion, ahh well, there will be others...

I think the furryness has been... cemented into me. At last, I finally saw, through an unfiltered lens, the fandom. Without the tint of the internet, without other people's opinions. All in all, they are mostly awesome people. A couple annoying, silly people here and there, other people who look better in their fursuit then they do without, but they are people. People having fun. Yes yes, I know what you're thinking; what is this 'fun' you speak of? The fandom is an escape, yes, but even it has it's grounds in reality, furries live normal lives, for the most part, its just the extremes that frighten people, extremes that exist in all walks of life. And... mother of God, why do fursuits look so cute and cuddly!?

Don't get me wrong, I will resist the taint with all of my heart, so that I don't become a savage beast (see what I did there?) and lose my grip on reality. I have a close circle of friends of the more mundane type, and I don't see the need to risk it by advertising the fact that I have... rather odd tastes, and the only somewhat joking vow I made with my sister still stands, morbid as it is.

I've decided that I'm going to run away from home to attend a furry convention. Heaven have mercy... I've attended anime cons before, but always local, or with parental planning involved, and never a 'fur' con, though I expect any differences to be... minimal, just with more fur.

I'm going alone, which has it's pro's and con's. On the one hand, the likelihood that anyone I might know being there is next to 'nil', meaning know one will know my secret! ...Except my sister... how she found out in the first place... ahh well, we're bros, so it's cool. Also, I only have to worry about myself, no more escorting my twerpy little sibling around, huzzah! Of course there is always the possibility that something will go wrong... issues of money, logistics and personal safety. I've decided to take the train, hoping nothing bad will happen, either missing a stop or a connection or something. The train costs roughly 25% as much as a flight would be, though it will be four times as long... time really is money. At the very least, if I get up uber early, I can sleep on the train. Then I've still got to find a hotel/motel/hostel to settle into... I 'spose this journal entry really just boils down to anxiety.

That having been said, this journey will be one of self discovery as much as spatial displacement. It will be a journey by me, for me, no relying on parents or anyone else like a child anymore. That... and I will be confronting what has, perhaps unfortunately, become a source of inner conflict. I'm not what you'd call a 'proud' furry, I don't go around advertising it, for obvious reasons of course; no body likes it when someone throws something like this in their face. That and it's controversial nature in general... I'm really unlocking the closet here... or at least, another corner of it (see my previous journal entry, if you dare~!)

I'd better stop, before I metaphorically cut my heart open and bleed all over the journal entry. Wish me luck!

To the Mercury Lounge. The event tonight was 'Whipped Kreme'. In other words, the stage had a whipping post set up. You know, the kind where you're tied up and then flogged for being a bad boy or a naughty girl? I have a friend... who knows the event organiser. He asked if I would 'like to be spanked'.

Now, I usually conceal my 'power level' as to my perversion, but... I just couldn't resist! I was led up to the post, briefed that it would be a gentle session, asked if I had back problems, health issues, removed my shirt, the works and all, before I was cuffed and chained to the post by a total stranger. There were three in total... my tormentors, handlers, dom's if you will. An asian (oriental) girl I had never met, a gal I had met once before, and a guy I had met maybe half an hour before, all nearly or at least twice my age. Here I was, topless before a crowd of strangers, with three people behind me, ready to deliver the pain. The gal I didn't know began. A gentle massage, her hands wandered up and down my back, before delivering a series of firm spanks to my buttocks, making it wiggle.

Then the others began. Not with the floggers, not immediately, but with their nails! Oh Gods above their finger nails! They grazed my back, gliding up and down... doesn't sound like much, but I'm very sensitive and ticklish, and I was squirming like a fish out of water, shivering... it felt as if electricity was tingling my spine. They would glide up and down, fondle me gently, and my body would react uncontrollably, shivering, my back arching, my fingers gripping the post till they were white knuckled.

The flogging began, very gently, light grazes, and I had the audacity to tell him that he could go harder. He went hard. Across my shoulder blades, careful not to strike any vital organs, but heavens above it was such a delicious pain. They would alternate between whipping, spanking with their hands, and giving me more light scratches along my back. Sometimes their hands would wander over my belly, sometimes they'd slap my ass more. I bent over a little, wiggling my hips, trying to use body language to ask for more. Maybe my jeans limited the impact... but I enjoyed the butt smacking.

They would ask me if I was alright, needed anything, that sort of thing, but I kept nodding, telling them how I liked it, how it was delicious, delightful. It really did hurt, but I was determined not to let it show, or overwhelm me. It didn't, in fact, the light nail grazing came closer to breaking me. I could stand firm against the flogger, but I can't get over how much their nails set me off! They made me shiver so much that I had unwittingly shuffled forward, almost knocking the post over. I'm pretty sure at one point I even let out a moan... lost in the loud music of the club.

At one point he dangled the flogger over my nose, and asked me if I liked the smell of leather (had to ask 3 times, because I can't hear myself think, much less hear anyone else over the loud bass.) I nodded, saying I did... and it wasn't unpleasant. I could tell it wasn't a new one, it's scent was dull, but it was there, and I was more than happy to take deep breaths, my chest was rising and falling like a goddamn balloon, I was damn near close to hyper ventilating at some point. I pushed my head into it, letting myself feel the worn leather as it cascaded over my face like thick strands of hair.

As all good things, it came to an end. Could have been 5 minutes... or thirty minutes, probably only 5 or so, but by Jove, it was absolutely heavenly. Apparently I had quite the crowd, 7 girls had lined up waiting for a turn, feels boss man. I thanked everyone involved, had a couple more Rum and Cokes, before heading home. I just examined my back in the mirror, and my shoulder blades have turned a most wonderous shade of dark red... they seem to have 'favoured' my right side. I just hope no once notices... awkward questions. o_o

A brief flash of momentary madness and depression, meeting my 50 year old co-worker who was dressed in drag at a bar, plans to visit a furry convention, what a life I live.

Visited Montreal with my Auntie and Uncle on Sunday, didn't see any protesters, but there was a bomb threat on the metro subway between downtown and the Grand Prix race track, so we had to pass 5 security check points, bomb sniffing dogs, police officers in full garb, backpack checks, etc. They were all very polite and thankfully could speak English well enough to get the message across, so it wasn't a hassle. Visited the Fort de l'Île Sainte-Hélène Stewart Museum, 'lotta military and historical stuff in the area, much of which I already knew, but it was cool to see all the same, and then we checked out 'La Ronde', Montreal's amusement park, dating back to the 1967 International and Universal Exposition. My companions only accompanied me on several of the rides, I think 'La Vampire' intimidated them, but my goodness, what a rush of heart-pumping adrenaline!

Momentum on personal projects has all but evaporated, for the present, but my core ideas have been written down, so they will be ready to go when I can focus on my work. Two months to do one little project... good thing I'm not being graded, I'm already long overdue! It's like... looking at a skeletal structure. You can just picture in your mind's eye what the full body would look like in all of it's glory, molded to the frame, but you still need to sit down and stitch it together, each little piece, every word and letter before it becomes truly beautiful. They say a picture is worth one thousand words, then do not one thousand words a detailed picture make? Worse still, I'm already questioning the finished product before it is finished! Ahh, to be defeated by one's self, a most formidable opponent...

# Those Quebecois girls? Hoooooooot~

My blisters have blisters. My blisters have blisters. I accidentally popped the blisters on my hands open and found blisters underneath.
Sore and stiff, but surviving, manual labour is 'honest' hard work as they say, and not nearly as mindless as one might expect, though digging holes does give one time to think. If it were possible to think one's self to death by forgetting to breathe, I'm sure I'd have done that to myself by now.

53 hour work weeks suck, barely have time to log on and have fun with friends, sometimes not at all, at least my co-workers are good people. What annoys me though is that I have almost no time to work on hobby writing projects... and I'm often distracted when I do find time to write (type). *Sighs as he looks forlornly at a protest sign with the lettering 'Free Oscil!'* So many ideas... so little time. And Libraries! Book stores! Simultaneously love them and hate them. They are places of knowledge, collected and codified, fact and fiction, entertainment and things you need to know, they contain some of humanity's greatest works, and represent some of the best and brightest minds of humankind. Then I remember that I don't have time to read all of them... or even just the books I'd like to!

So remember folks, enjoy your free time, especially while you're young! But don't neglect your school work either!

In the past two days I have:
Gone down on more holes than in my entire life.
Heard Gotye's 'Somebody That I Used to Know' on the radio no less than seven (7) times.
Gone to bed before midnight twice in a row... and gotten up at 6 AM. This has never happened before.

Ottawa is a beautiful city, especially when the sun decides it wants to shine. Really brightens up the day, y'know? My only regret is that I'm gonna be working most of the time, so that my other, more personal projects will suffer, and my chances for exploration will be limited to what can be accomplished in the time I get home and have dinner and then go to bed, which is roughly 3-4 hours. I'll skive off work for the Tulip festival and such, but yeah.

Thought for the day: If you cut an earthworm in half, does that constitute as 'rape'?

100 bucks in Commission Credit:

http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/3403546/

*Waves an 'Ω' like its warding off evil spirits.*

...Flying away really, but yes, I'm fleeing from home... to go live in another city to work a summer job.

With the final exam period over for me, and a rather harrowing year of post secondary education behind me, I think I'm ready for some therapeutic heavy lifting. The grueling work schedule, however, means that I'm going to be busy, dedicating most of the time to do much else other than eat, sleep, work, and of course going to and from work, laundry, foraging for supplies... I might not even have time to get wasted and masturbate! The horror! The horror...
Hopefully I'll get a chance to work on some of my story projects; namely: A medical report on the strange afflictions of the furry world, my own story, which I have decided to christen 'The Man in the Dark Iron Mask', for now at any rate, as well as at least one, possibly several little side stories for a certain girly boy of a pony...

Long story short, from now (tomorrow morning) until September, I'm going to be a busy bee. I wish you well, friends, you know who you are!

Because no one ever visits my page anyways, but I don't want to sound like a jerk to my friends.
So.
I have a one night stand... of sorts... got too lovey dovey, and now I'm listening to a someone's life story, filled with mormons and suicidal thoughts.
I'm such a carebear... why is that? I always sucked in Player vs Player combat, from WoW to SSBB, and when I should be 'not giving a fuck', I find myself listening to other people's problems. Its somewhat infuriating, having someone cry or whine or bitch at you, ruining your sexual appetite or even your mood in general. And yet still I listen...

...I'd put examples here, but A: That would be betraying confided secrets, and B: I've forgotten most of them anyways...

I hold secrets. Mostly my own.. but, every once in a while, I lull people into a sense of security and trust, sometimes to the point that they share some of theirs with me. Their life story, their hopes and their fears, that which makes them tick. Good thing I promptly forget most of those secrets, but yes.

I was lucky. I pretty much won the lottery (lost in some other areas of course), when it comes to family and well being. I was born into an upper middle class family, and raised by two loving, caring, if somewhat dysfunctional parents.

More often than not, all the unhappy people I come across can trace that unhappiness back to their parents, feelings of abandonment, abuse or neglect. Please, this world is too painful already, we don't need more of that. So please, if you have children, for the love of whatever deity you worship, you better goddamn love the fuck out of your kids! (Not in that way you sickos) Praise and punish all you want, but you need to be there for your kids! Support them when they need it, guide them with a healthy set of ethics and morals and values when they stray from the straight and narrow, but above all else, give them the love they need!

Been rather busy these past few days. Haven't even started on the next chapter, though I've got a pretty good idea of where I want to go. Introduce new characters, develop one or two previous ones, and flesh out some of the technological marvels of my story. Granted said technology is not without expense, and is quite possibly impossible. But that is what science does, does it not? It makes the impossible a reality, with some hiccups inbetween. Besides, this is fiction, the world is my puppet, the keys on my board my strings. Going to try to make it longer in terms of length as well, add more pages to it, thats one thing I didn't quite satisfy myself with. Raw juicey detail. I need more.

At some point I'm probably gonna try to track someone down for concept art, I'd love to see my characters take form in another medium, and I don't think I've moved much beyond gradeschool level art...

I have written/typed my first entry, in what will hopefully be the first of several stories I wish to flesh out. Pending a little more proof reading, I will post it here. Metaphorically spreading my wings for a test flight, I'm going to soar into some rather dark territory in the first chapter, or prologue to a tale of upheaval and world domination. A tale of technology and dark research. Of evil overlords, mad scientists, dedicated soldiers, and the innocents caught between. Now I just need to think of a title...

On Fur Affinity. Where the banners are crazy and the residents aren't always human. A number of my... ahh, shall we say, 'acquaintances', have Fur Affinity accounts, so I decided it might be worth my time to lurk around here, if only to see the craziness below the surface of those I... ahem, deal with. Never been much of a furry myself, I've just taken an interest in the pornography, and in some cases, the plot. I will always be a human at heart, but who knows what can happen on the internet, hmm?