So, I figured I needed to get this out in the open because I've been a wreck since Wednesday night and Thursday when it all came to a head. It has to do with the college I'm currently attending and also my mate Unrealfox. Fox had a bad day on Wednesday and it just carried over after he got home.

I am (or was) the lead on a project for school. So, I made a text group for everyone to be able to communicate because some people didn't have internet when they got home so they couldn't use discord. So, I was talking to my friends if they had heard from this one person who claims to be trans but looks and acts like a female, but claims to be male. (I think it's just to be able to use the guy's bathroom in order to see dicks.) But that's only because she has a boyfriend and all that... Doesn't look or act like the gender that they want and I kinda think it all came about because game design is a predominantly male field...

Let's keep in mind that a lot of my friends on here are transitioning, transitioned, or are in the process of... I love all my friends dearly and I in no way would try to call someone something that they are not. When I meet or have met someone on here whom I knew as a guy and then they transitioned to female... I never called them he... But they absolutely look the part! She wants to be called he and wears women's clothing and everything... So, of course, I end up fucking up a lot and saying she, her, and gurl. (Like, hey, gurl!) I just feel like this person is treating all of the transgender stuff as a joke and wanting to see if they can get away with it. It feels like a lie to me and it makes me mad that they are pretty much disrespecting the LGBTQ community. A community that I stand behind and will defend against hate and slander. So, this is where my anger comes from. But I don't want to get into it with them, because I don't feel like it's my place to try to explain what they are doing... I feel is wrong.

So, I told you all that so you'd have the background to go on for the story.

Wednesday night I was trying to get the girl (guy) to tell me if they had any work for me to see. Being the lead and everything I have to check everyone's work and then hand it off to the art or programming lead and then go on to the next person. I have to organize everything and because I have a head for programming and art... I was elected the head lead. So, I am always asking people to let me see what they got. I'm aware of any problems anyone is having. (One of our programmers for the game is transitioning and having a hard time with their medications.) I pick up whatever slack they have and help them however I can... The last game we did I programmed everything myself (a contra type game) and it was horrific. We only had two weeks to work on it and half the class didn't turn in jack for shit...

So, that Wednesday finally one of the art leads got ahold of this person. He/She is supposed to be working on the UI. And pretty much fucks off watching youtube and anime most of the time. So, when they were finally alive. I was given excuse after excuse. I was told that he/she was in the lab (computer lab) doing nothing but talking super loud about nothing. They then told me that they had it done and hadn't uploaded it because of no internet. I said you were in the lab... There's internet there. They said it wasn't on any of the google drives and that they had it on another computer and it was at home. I was like... I'm tired of all the excuses... (Because they then told me about blown-out tires and working... I've heard these fake excuses before and they had no proof and someone had seen them drive away without any problems...) So, witnesses had seen them and told me about it... I told them I would talk to them tomorrow. I repeated that about 3 or 4 times... Then UnrealFox and another lead decided to ask about it, and it escalated. I interjected that we could talk about this tomorrow... But someone decided to say... You got this, gurl... Then was like... Oops... I mean guy... Then Fox decided to jump in with... It's a girl can we just stop pretending... Or something to that effect. They then came back and said, "I'm a guy..." Then Fox because of his bad day went off... Stating that she didn't act like a guy in any way shape or form...

It finally ended after a while, and nothing too terrible was said... But then another student forwarded the entire conversation to our professor... Our professor decided that Fox was harassing her... Which aside from him saying he was a she... Then after that it was all about get your work done. I don't care what you think you are... Get your work uploaded. It needs to be uploaded by tomorrow. We need to add it to the UI... Things like that.

So, according to our professor's mind... It's harassment when you tell someone repeatedly to just do their work and stop giving excuses why it's not done!

We get to school and drive up... The guy/girl is walking outside to go to the bookstore... They see our car and run (I mean sprint) back into the building. Presumably to tattle that we just pulled up. We went inside and I went into the computer lab to talk to everyone about the convo the night before and to talk about what they had done. I didn't turn on the computer, because everyone told us that the professor wanted to talk to Fox. I sat and waited. I got up and walked out and seen that there was a police officer there now. I was thinking... Is that really needed? I knew he was there because of Fox, and I stood outside at the front doors. Students kept coming out to talk to me and told me that they thought the police officer was only there because Fox is black.

I thought about it and realized that they were right. When we had nearly the same thing happen a year ago between two white students... There were no police officers... Only the professor aking one of them to go home.


So, now, Fox was told before he could come back to class he had to see a counselor...I, on the other hand, took all the grievances to the Dean and the Dean forwarded it to our professor's boss. I have to meet with his boss on Tuesday where she wants me to talk about any grievances I have...

There are an absolute ton of them. Like the fact he only grades twice a semester. So, if we're doing something wrong... We don't know until he grades it and by then it's too late. I'm checking my mail now to see if he's suddenly grading. The fact that if someone misses assignments (4 in a row) they are supposed to be removed from class. That is a lie because I know people who have and he keeps them.

This is all because his numbers for this class are shit. People drop out constantly because he knows less than most people in his class. He asks students to help him with the lesson plan... The day before on Tuesday... We're in mobile programming... He asks us... What do you guys want to learn? I'm like... You're the teacher...

He's never built a game, is not as good at 3D modeling as some of the others in the class... Our art lead stomps him in 3D she is amazing at it... It makes me envious!

The whole thing that really makes me mad is that he wouldn't look at me or even talk... Fox asked him to talk about it, and he said... I don't think we should and then looked at the cop standing there as if he was asking the officer to haul us away.

He is not a good teacher at all, and to think that I even cared enough to give him Christmas presents or be nice to him really pisses me off... It's like having a friend turn on you and then it's just infuriating. He knows nothing... He doesn't grade anything most of the time, and just makes jokes and acts more like a student than a teacher. It makes me wonder if he actually has a master's degree or not... The way he acts is more like a clown than a professor...

I am pissed... I am hurt... And I have horrible sweats and panic attacks when I even think about going back to class. I don't want to go to that place. I actually think I might have PTSD from what happened. I need to find a shrink but none I have called will take me for at least 2 weeks. I can't wait that long... I need to either drop these classes or something... I can't take it and I'm a wreak thinking about it.

But that's what happened... The police were there... My professor wouldn't look at me... Fox is my ride and since he kicked Fox out... He automatically kicked me out. I never want to see him again, though. Going back to that college means I would have to see him and that sets me into panicking fits. I've dropped classes in high school before because a guy I liked was in it, but we had an argument and so I quit the art class. (Even though the teacher begged me to stay telling me I was one of the best students she ever had...) It meant a lot to me, but I couldn't take it. I get fearful and it's fight or flight...

Besides that when I talk to his boss and bring up every single thing that has been going on... I don't think he'll be there for much longer...

https://www.facebook.com/imago3d
https://www.twitch.tv/imago3d
https://picarto.tv/imago3d
https://www.periscope.tv/Imago3d/1eaKbQdqMNBxX

I still have to wait 24 hours before youtube clears my account for streaming... Know of any other streaming services that you'd rather watch me on... Let me know...

Also, I'm on Discord if you want to talk... I don't know how to stream to that...

https://discord.gg/m47PqYU

Don't know what I'll be doing... But I'll be doing it.

My birthday was awful, but I'm going to try to get over it and get to something else. I'm probably going to stream tonight... I don't know what I'll be doing, but I'll be doing something. I'm going to be on Discord at 7pm my time... For probably an hour or so while I stream. Inviting everyone to come and say hi.

Just trying to cheer up and get the ball rolling for other things... I need to do more stuff and get more done. Dammit.

I kinda lost my mojo a while back... Need to get it back.

https://discord.gg/bJugB7H

It was horrible at first, but turned out okay in the end. There's just a lot of bullshit involving the college I'm currently attending. >.< It's just a fucked situation all around...

I'm still trying to recover from it. Now, that I have absolutely no obligations it's time to get back to work on Paws of Combat, and also I have to go through the Art Time entries. :)

But I'm trying to have a little downtime after yesterday. I might actually do something fun. (Maybe stream... I haven't done that in a while...)

Picarto
Twitch
Youtube

Just wondering. I think when I finish up with the stuff I'm working on... I might stream again. :D

http://www.furaffinity.net/user/blackpanthress/

Go check her out. She's a fantastic Zbrush artist. I really envy how fast she is and the skill she has for toe beans!!

Go on... She's streaming at the moment! Go watch! She's a super lady.

http://www.furaffinity.net/user/blackpanthress/

Sorry, I haven't replied yet. Trying to get a lot of overdue work out of the way. So, I want to get everything done before I start posting stuff.

Anyhow, update on college...

I've been accepted and will be going to Western Carolina University this upcoming Fall. (Whoo hooo!)

I'm working on college work still and last semester was hell with classwork, still being sick, and then all the surgeries to get everything out. (I told them just take an ice cream scoop and get all the fucking cancer out.) I didn't care what I lost as long as I had an arm and eye left. XD (Thankfully, it didn't come to that.)

Christmas was awful and so was Thanksgiving... Hopefully, my birthday (Jan 30) will be better. (I hope so.) I plan on being lazy and sleeping the whole day away and having some pizza for dinner. That is the perfect day for me!

So, I am doing better, but haven't answered anyone just yet because I've been working on old work and haven't been back here in a couple of days. (Don't worry!! I'm coming back and I have LOTS to share!!)

My watcher's only raffle thing is still going on!

Go for it!!

Other than that I've been feeling great lately!! So, feel free to say hi. :D

Leave a link to your fursona... This time I'm going to pick randomly...

So, the rules...

Give me a link to a picture of your fursona...

Tell me how you found me and why you stuck around...

Tell me which of my characters you find appealing... (Extra points if you tell me why!)

This will end around January 30th (my birthday... WOOOOOOO!!!)

I might roll a die, or pick based on initials... Or something...

So, if you're a watcher... :D You know the drill answer the questions, and leave a link!

Well, I did it because I have an extra five dollars and this site has brought me a lot of friends, money, and fun over the years. (Not to mention a great way to show off my art.) So, I figured why not... It's a way to give back...

Plus I get to name my tips... Not that I get tips, but if I did... I'd name them something... Maybe chips... Or booze...

I haven't had a drink in a year... LOL! Cancer does that... You can't drink when you have it because of your meds...

Anyhow, here's hoping everyone is having a great day...

Holy crap. I'm not sure how I feel about the changes. They look wonderfully sleek, but it took me a minute to navigate here and there. It's like wow...

Okay, now, I know a lot of you are like... WHERE THE FUCK HAVE YOU BEEN?!

Well, I was told last year (on my birthday January 30th) that I had cancer. Breast cancer. Not horrible, but you can die from it. Which was scary! I do not want to go through any of this again... So, the short of it... I had cancer... Now, I don't. (knock on wood... I hope they got it all.) The cancer had moved into my lymphatic system and shit and so we had to cut out all the lady parts... No more kids... Sadly, but it's probably for the best... I'm getting old(er)...

So, they got rid of it but I was tired and sick almost all the time. So, I needed a break and time to rest and recuperate.

I've had that... Now, I'm back...

Paws of Combat is still a go, but I haven't been able to work on it while needing all this sleep. So, literally, it was put on hiatus for a while as I dealt with the Big C. Now, I can get back to the things that mean the most to me...

Art, games, and everyone still following me, after all, this time I was gone...

Sorry, I haven't responded to anyone lately. I'm not quite out of the woods yet, but everything looks very hopeful. So, it's one day at a time now. Some days are better than others.

So, it's all one foot in front of the other at the moment. Treatments are going well, but they make me sick as hell so I haven't been up and talking or arting at all. Sadly, because I think if I could art I'd feel better.

For anyone who has been following you know that I've been having bouts of pneumonia. (Which isn't normal.) I figured it was just my shitty immune system, but it turned out to be worse than that...

I went to my doctor because I was fatigued all the time and just figured I was really bored or something. He ordered some tests and scans. Turns out I have stage 2 cancer. I've been trying to come to terms with that over the past month and I haven't been having a good time of it. I've been wondering what, why, and how. I've been to see an oncologist this past week and he's hopeful that if we don't find anything else that I'll be back to my old self after the treatments (radiation, chemo, and hormone therapy... I don't know what hormones have to do with cancer, but the hell with it.). Apparently... I'm riddled with it.

But I haven't been feeling like myself at all. I've been depressed, moody, and staying away from everyone and everything that I can. I don't want to bring others down, and I hate discussing my situation. The what-if's are too huge sometimes for me to deal with. It's bad enough that it's actually painful. I didn't know that about cancer until a few weeks ago. They did a biopsy and this damn thing has been pissed off ever since.

So, that's where I've been... Pissed off, scared, and hating everything. (Not a good place to be.) But on the 19th I'll know more about what the CT scan told my doctor, and then we're going to have a PET scan done. (As soon as my insurance company gets off their ass and gives him approval for it.)

So, I'm not going to be doing commissions until (and if) I go in to remission. I'm still finishing the two I have and after that probably just adopts and personal art. (Maybe some gift stuff.) But nothing where I'm taking money for it, because like I said before... I don't know if I'll get a chance to finish it. Still working on coding and POC, but it's even slower and considering trying to find someone to help me organize it and put it together. (Having to know Unity would be a must, though, and the fact that I'm not going to hand it over to someone who just wants free models or something. >.< )

*sigh* Life sucks for me right now...

I was told on Wednesday by my doctor that I had developed pneumonia... T.T AGAIN!!! (My immune system has always been shit.)

But instead of doing what the doctor said and stay home... I went to classes. (It's bacterial pneumonia so I'm not infectious to anyone.) Sadly... Friday night... I had to have my mate call an ambulance to come get me because I couldn't breathe, was confused, and didn't know where I was...

I'm working on my health at the moment... So, that means sleep, sleep, and more sleep. (And eating somewhere.) I'm hoping this will pass soon. So, if I haven't gotten back to a note or two please forgive me... I've been shit with this sickness.

But you know the old saying... Whatever doesn't kill us... XD

So, here's mine...

Happy New Year, everyone!

Hope everyone had a safe and happy start to the new year!

's cat needs help. Boosting in hopes that she can get this surgery done. I know how it is to have pain in your bones that doesn't go away...

https://www.gofundme.com/qmdjv-lily039s-surgery

I'm imaginationally bankrupt at the moment.

Give me ideas for sex scenes. No characters just settings and sex scenes. I want to do some NSFW stuff, but can't think of anything. If you want to see closeups... Say it. Tentacles? Say it. Need ideas!

Going 50% off everything in my Sellfy store.

Coupon Imago50Off

:D

https://sellfy.com/imago

If you haven't already come on in to the Nuthouse on my discord server. Ask questions, chat if I'm online, and just talk. :) See some of my un-uploaded art too. :)

https://discord.gg/vr8m5Qw

And a happy new year... (I hope.)

Everyone who entered the November raffle should have their pics posted now. They were wing its just because I was doing so many. If there was a suggestion I went with that, but other than that I tried to figure something out that would look nice.

Hope everyone has a Merry Christmas or whatever holiday you might celebrate... And even if you don't celebrate the holidays... Hope you have a great December.

Hopefully, I'll be able to keep from getting sick and enjoy my December as well. (Because November was hell for me catching every virus that was floating around out there.)

The November watcher pics. I'm going to stagger them out. So, if you don't see yours right away don't freak out it's coming. (I shouldn't have to say that, but I've had freak outs in the past on stuff... So, fair warning.)

I also don't want to flood the front page. Reason? Because it's rude. Plus it gives people time to see them in their feeds or wherever.

Anyhow...

Patience...

Even though classes were cancelled for both the finals days. Tuesday classes were cancelled about 8 hours ago. So, I finished everything, uploaded it, and sent emails to my professors. (Which they told us to do.) So, now is my break. A nice almost 3 weeks to get things done with no pressure, and no classwork. (Until January 4th when we go right back in.)

Although, I will have Tuesday and Thursday off this coming semester. Which means no long 1/2 hour drives to get to class. Which will be nice. Which also means I'll have a couple work days since my classes this coming semester are Programming 2. (By the way I got 100's on every assignment in Programming 1. Which means I got an A.) Modeling 2 (which will be a breeze)... I got an A in modeling 1 and only got a 95 on one assignment. (Where I forgot to set my project file... Oops. Only Maya knows why. XD) Art for games (which sounds awesome... I hope it is...) and that I believe is all. Smooth semester with little worries.

So now I can finally breath since the only class that gave me a fit was Design 1. (Not 3d, not computer aided... I had to cut paper, glue paper, and paint paper... By hand... Barbaric!!!) I got a low A or a high B... Won't know until my final is graded on that one. I'm hoping for an A. Which would give me all A's for the semester. (GO ME!)

Anyhow, right now I'm batch rendering November watcher pics that should have been out weeks ago. T.T (Mostly because I had pneumonia that had me sleeping most of the time. T.T) Finally better but still having a cough.

Well... I'm happier at least a little now. I can finally breathe again.

NC has a shit power company so keeping the power on is usually not likely. Snow is currently dumping on Asheville with rain, sleet, and snow. (It sucks.) I'd rather have nice fluffy snow. But it's likely the power will go out and for how long I don't know. (I live on top of a mountain out in the middle of nowhere.)

Hopefully, it doesn't but... Duke Energy sucks eggs most of the time. >.<

Will be up sometime later this week. I wanted to get all of them done before posting. Just letting everyone know in between being sick and classes I haven't forgotten.

There won't be a raffle for December because... Christmas and it's family time and stuff.

Plus... Need a week or so before starting the next semester.

How to make head congestion go away so I can breathe and think clearly? I've tried saline. I've tried steam. I've tried Eucalyptus. Nothing makes a dent and everything tastes like Styrofoam. (Although, missing a few meals wouldn't kill me. XD) But seriously... I just want to do things, but I can't think through this fog.

Programming 1... January 4th or whenever classes starts again I'll be in programming 2. I made it through with every assignment... 100... Across the board. Awesome, because I didn't think it would turn out that way, but it did.

Still have to get through 3D modeling (easy LMAO!), and game design... The only class that's kicking my ass is 2D Design. (It sounds fun doesn't it?) No... It's hard... And horrible.

Why? Because I have to cut out things and glue them, and then paint them. It pisses me off since I don't have great hand eye coordination. So, cutting shit out is a fucking pain in the ass. Painting is worse, because how the hell do you not get streaks using a brush? I'll probably get a C, but fuck it. As long as I never have to retake the class... I'll be happy.

So, when the break hits I'll get everything done or at least up to where it should be. Not to mention I've got a cold... So, I had one day where I felt great and now... My head has exploded with snot. Fuck... FUCK... FUCK!!!