* takes a deep breath* So yeah my wireless router forgets the wireless part, i buy a new one (70 dollars), my girlfriend breaks up with me less than 2 weeks after dating, my friend breaks my bed and a car jack is all that's keeping it upright, my car starts smelling oddly like oil from the interior and has to be sent into the shop on a day i have classes, and my phone took a shit and i had to wipe it of all it's memory, all within the span of one week * exhales*

Yeah I'm bored as hell. Thought I'd let you all know.

Well anyone who's actually paying attention to me will know I learned a trick in photoshop to make pictures relatively cooler, and I'd like to get a bit more practice so if anyone wants to see me turn a picture into a fractal I'll happily do it. Few rules apply, I won't mess with anyone else's art unless I have the artists' permission and i forgot the second rule, but anyway if you want me to frac a picture, post me the link.

After having to drag my sorry ass to two different family thanksgivings, i took an hour long nap (damn turkey) and had my two closest friends over, these two nerds have been my friends since freshman year of highschool and we have been inseperable since. Well I offhandedly meantioned i had some Legos in the attic and Chelsea in all her nerdy wonder says " PULL THEM OUT" so for about an hour after this We are all playing with the little blocks made of Plastic and Nostalgia. Roland made something I can only describe as a Turbine Bunny... and i've done what I have always done, built some sort of mech cuz naturally thats the best thing to do with lego's. I'm actually surprise how well i built it and that i retained that many skills and tricks when it came to building cool shit. Anyway if you all care about it enough I might post some pics cuz i'm pretty proud of it and i haven't done shit in forever.

I thought bits and pieces was all a heart could be broken into but apparently I overlooked dust. A little while ago, I develouped a crush on a lovely girl who's name I won't meantion, but I thought I had finally done it, finally I had beat the odds and found a girl that would care for me in return, and what do ya know, she's furry, I could be myself. She showed promise, was sweet to me in the final week, and eventually she spent the night at my place. We... fooled around a bit, but probably for the better my virginity is still intact (I wouldn't want to lose it in these circumstances) and I finally released all doubts. Two days later: " Sorry, but he asked again, and I said yes." Is what I read.

Now what happened between these two days, is she came out and was honest that she was torn between me and another guy, which I can undestand, I think. Now the fun part of this story, is the guy that I can't beat, doesn't even live in the same fucking state. She knows him through Second life. What the hell is wrong with me when I can't outdo a guy over the internet? Do I have some sort of curse on me that after one date, I lose my appeal? So far evidence is leading up to that. She says she still wants to be friends though, and she feels deeply sorry for what she's put me through. I'm starting to feel my life is the same play over and over again with different supporting actors. A play where I am lead to believe I won't feel alone for a very long time, and high hopes are dropped like hot metal right as I remember what it's like to have a positive outlook on life, then expected to settle with less than what I worked and hoped for. I'm tired of the silver medal, I've got a closet full of the soul-rotting consolation prizes and I just can't accept another...

At this point, I'm worried what will go first, my heart or mind. The night this all took a dive, I laid in bed and talked to myself, trying to contemplate what the fuck is wrong with me and why am I not able to be happy with how I am. Now talking to myself is not what scared me, thats pretty normal for me, but what did is that I received responses... some degrading towards myself and others rather spineless. The damn things wouldn't flee until my thoughts were drowned in music. The following day, I felt my frustration and sorrow not as emotions, but as a state of mind, as if pain and misery were somehow nourishing my body. This was further supported when I felt not agony, but delight as I struck the granite kitchen countertops with my knuckles, hard. I've been in quite a funk since then, I hope that was a one-time event.

I need to get off my ass and do something

HA reverse psychology. Anyway i really didn't have anything to write about so enjoy me talking about absolutely nothing, i just felt like doing that for the hell of it and getting rid of the distressed journal I wrote last. So uh, yeah whatsup?

If it isnt' one thing it's another... I've had a horrible past few days, one thing after another has gone to hell, finally leading up to my computer taking a shit and not being able to log in properly. With the old case i had it in, it ran rather cool, why does it overheat when I move it into a case that has better airlfow?! Ontop of this, the first time in a while that I actually find a girl I can put some hope into and I'm too damn scared to go and spend time with her! Someone fucking shoot me.

Well my computer is fixed finally, after flashing the BIOS and reformatting the hard drive. Oddly enough all the Steam games were still loaded on the hard drive. If anyone has an idea about how those managed to survive the data equivalent of the Great Flood, please lemme know. And no wise cracks about a file named Noah building an ark >_>.

....Is the best way I can describe what has happened to my desktop. I was desperately searching for a silent hill 2 torrent that was actually healthy, and in my haste I managed to download a horrible virus which disguised itself as adware and I put it off to the side. By the time I actually considered it a nuisance, the damn thing had disabled my virus and malware protection, and thoroughly skull-fucked the shit out of my hard drive. Now the damn thing does little more than display error messages when I start it up. So the only option I have is to try torrenting a boot disk, worst caste scenario - i have to purchase a legal copy of windows and reformat it.

Moral of the story, use protection.

Is it still considered vore if you're just hungry?

For those who can't read 1337, that says "woot new computer" and i say it in this computer lingo for the desktop i have purchased at half the price, is made for gaming, and a fairly decent one. not the best out there mind you but it's a hell of a lot better than me wasting a ton of money to put together a computer with the little experience I have. So then, if any one has any games they'd like to play with me or recommend for torrenting, please post them :3

Anyone out there with cartoony talent. take this :http://fukung.net/v/19357/1bfe51cbcd806c5b3ff9f43dcf41327c.jpg and add FA to it.

Not like many people read my journals anyway but I kinda need some help deciding.

Anyway, I claim to be a writer but I have yet to write anything worth submitting on FA, but I got a few idea's for short stories that may be able to fit in the file limit. First is one I've been meaning to write about a character I created named Alexandir Vorner, A bobcat in the slums who has to deal with gang crimes and and shit like that, don't wanna ruin it too much. The second one came into my head recently in a dream which was pretty cool, where the first persona I ever created came to my current fursona, feeing betrayed that he was thrown away, and tried to do kill him in attempts to once again be my leading persona. I dunno, tell me which you think sounds more intteresting, not sure which I should write first >.<

Well contrary to popular belief I am not dead, i've just been in Dallas for four days without internet, queue cheesy horror movie scream. Anyway the whole time I could not think about anything other than king of the hill and how the local texans are pretty awsome hicks. Cept in downtown dallas, big hipster area where you apparently get a discount on rent and food for having a pint of ink in your skin. Oh and I saw some douchebag that was dressed like Bono, who I call a douchebag becuase he's dressed like Bono, a douchebag. Got to taste the original recipe of Dr. Pepper which is actually alot smoother and has a slight hint of tootsie roll after taste. Anyway, Throw the confetti for I have returned

Well it was awsome, got to see some friends off the internet and meet other cool people. Wasn't too bad once I got used to the fursuits, though the ones with follow-me eyes still give me shivers. It was a small dissapointment that the Ranting griffin wasn't there but Uncle Kage was still fantastic.

Ok well up until now i was sure I wasn't goign to megaplex, issues with money, and an excuse on where I'd be for an entire weekened. Well it turns out, i can get some money to get in at least and a friend,  zerome1221 lives in orlando so i can crash at his place rather than spending money on a hotel room. Mom will be out of town so she cant do much about where I am and my dad pretty much accepts the answer " Out with friends." for a whole weekend, plus he lives in orlando as well if I need anything so, here I come to my first Furry Con :3

On saturday I went with a friend to a picnic with her nerdy anime club from college, fun people I've hung out with them before. So the picnic is on this little spit of land called Honeymoon Island and everyone is required to bring some sort of food. Well we made cupcakes. Since I have a nice roomy car, bunch of people piled in to save money for the toll and save gas (their gas >.>). we expected the toll to be only 5 bucks, well we get there and surpise, surprise it's 8, so we are scrambling for 3 more dollars becuase everyone knows college students are the poorest humans on the planet. We pull up and my friend holds the dish of cupcakes out of the window, the dude takes one and gives us a parking pass. Apparently the net worth of a cupcake in florida is about 8 bucks. one dude brought some "extreme" sports frisbee which we fling around and like idiots get stuck in a palm tree, which resulted in an hour of McGuyver'ing a long stick out of two palm brances, shoe lace, a plastic bag and a broken mini-umbrella to get the blasted thing back down. Not to meantion we were using a broken lawnmower blade as a knife. Many bug bites and rocky shore bruises later, we end up at an ice cream shop, and one guy is quoting jokes that I recognized as Ranting Gryphon. Turns out three others in the group were furries :3

So I was out with friends on the 4th, hell of a time once you get passed walking a few miles over a small area just to get a good view of the show, then spend a soldi half hour just waiting to get out of where you parked. Anyway afterwards we went to one of my friends house where I stole her cat's seat and plopped him down on my lap to spoil him with petting and scratching. Randomly int he middle of our nerdy talk I just asked " What the hell makes a cat purr?" All of us being confused, we went to the wise and powerful wikipedia for enlightenment. Turns out scientists still don't know how any feline purrs, just hypothesis that involves rapid vibrations in the larynx, but not how they do it. We can put a man on the moon but we can't figure out how the fuck a cat purrs...

For a while I've had somewhat of a webcomic idea (yeah i know, cliche since everyone has a webcomic up and only about 20% of them are actually good) and I finally found a guy who would collab with me on it since I can't draw. He can't write so it works out. Anyway I don't know how long it will be before some actually show up but it's called 'Typos' and follows a few characters through chat rooms and RP's, kinda poking fun at what furries really are on the interweb.

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