ok so for some of you who know ever plan ive had for moving so far has basically fallen apart befor my eyes so im wondering if anyone is willing to give me a little crash space so i can job hunt in an area that isnt flint as the only place i can get is not even in flint and is shit in the first place.

sooo yeah recent evens are keeping me from having a long term relationship atm form what i possably might do soon (move away) and since i cant rly do long distance relationships im kindof thinking of putting myself out there to be a pet but only a temp thing untill i move idk just wondering if anyone thinks that its a good idea or not i guess i just dont know


yeah kindof lonely

i wonder how much it would run me to get a plushie the proper size for izy my younger sona cuz it so i can carry him on my back and possibly make him into a little bit of a backpack with a few hidden pockets

yeah not sure but if things are going the way they are cuz michigan seems to not be working for me anymore i might move across the country i get 2 choices arizona or montana my first choice is arizona which i get to find out if i can this weekend the second choice i alrdy know is a yes i can but i knidof rly want to go to arizona i hope i can and i hope i can get a job there that will help me out....

ok i lied but watch this

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ig-pZ4OyidY

sooo as a few of you are aware i settled into a nice little depression do to some drama with my family and someone decided to make it worse by making fun of me for it then tried to say i was making fun of autism later when i talked to him idk where that idea came from. anywho yeah down in the dumps trying to get back on my feet and a few of you helped me out by letting me help you with your problems (yeah im lost there as well) so im currently debating on going back to college or not i have an idea of what i should do and most of the ppl i asked to see if it sounded like i should agreed with it 100% so i might be a little more scares then usual and angryso it might be a smart idea to not try and piss me off.

k
luv ya
bye bye
luvs u more
nuuh i luvs you more
k forreals now
bye bye

apparently at mff ppl found me attractive which for me is something im not use to i mean i dont find myself like that i still think im fat and need to drop some wait and stuff but i mean jeeze being told your sexy or hot by sooo meny different ppl im not sure if i should feel honored or be scared that just just want to fuck me so yeah randomness of my weekend

yep tomorrow thats right ill be there if you want to you can find me not sure who all knows me or what i look like but ill be there fyi saturday is my furry blues brother day so if you see me ill talk im not shy and i loves meeting ppl so i hope to see and talk to you there

ok ive been asked to ether use one of my sonas in a pic i draw or to let someone use one... i will say im fine with ppl using ether of them but i do have some restrictions on them

1. Isrisu will not WILL NOT!!! be usable in dirty pics what so ever if i find out i will be mad with a passion
2. Isrisu can be used in pics that involve hand holding and kissing and to some extent sleeping in a bed with someone SLEEPING!
3.Aka can be used in any pics as his age no doing younger pics without me giving permission which will probably not happen.
4. i dont care if you use my sonas but you must inform me and give me the right for my characters

its not much but theses are the main rule i have for using my characters if you follow theses rules then you can draw away

ok sooo..... ive been enjoying alot of stories about runaways latly fictions that is and its mainly because back in the day i was almost one of them... yeah for those of you who have met my parents they are nice now cuz they realised im trying to get out of there so you met then when they where nice they were way way worse when i was younger. with my shitty memory im surprised i remember most of this but at one point of my life i went through hell and was actually about to runaway i had everything packed and was going to leave one night but after school i went to a friends house to tell them that i was going to do it and i heard something i never heard befor they told me "if you do that i will lose all respect for you" now mind you this was my one friend and we were close so when i heard that it fliped my world upside down cuz i was going to do it when i got home i feel bad cuz i now cannot remember their name cuz a year later they moved but they made me promis i would never do anything stupid that would endanger my life like that and i am one to my word. im rly greatful for that as i would have never became the person i am today without being told that and who knows what would have happend to me yes i know i sound like a winney ass bitch and there are ppl who have had it worse then i did but i thought it would be something to share cuz i felt like sharing i just hope when i move i can put this behind me and become happier with the ppl i love in the city im trying to go to but yeah random insert of my life there ive also considered suicide at one point after being ignored and forgotten about by my own parents when with that phrase that rang through my mind of what they told me i did not and from that point on i decided to avoid the easy ways out and try and better myself whenever i get the chance i hope this gives some light on why i am the way i am if not you know know a little of my past which i can remember.

im going to do 5 free sketches(headshots) for 5 lucky ppl and not the first 5 to comment i think im going to do a close my eyes and pic method or just completely random just an fyi if you spread the word have the person say who they heard it from as it just might increase your chances and no you cannot say you heard it from me cuz that doesnt count

1.(empty)
2.(empty)
3.(empty)
4.(empty)
5.)empty)
???.(why is this here idek)

im getting to the point of needing some extra cash im working 7 days at moment but im needing a little extra for some needs (not going into details) mainly car thats all i saying so the little extra will help me im going to be doing small sketches for everyone who donates and if i get enough takers i will do a live stream for the top donator well a time the fits around both their and my schedules that is so if anyone is interested send me a pm or something.

sooo if you havent heard i got a tablet to draw on and ive been doing random practices on it so random pics will be uploaded im rly having fun with this thing hehe

im tired of setting up plans and having ppl just up and say srry cant make it the day they are or my favorite 10 min befor i start it i had nothing big just a fire at my place and i didnt rly want to drive and pic ppl up so i said it was adrive over thing but what happens alomost everyone but a few ppl who told me they are going to try but not promising the will go ended up telling me they cant make it today and yes they told me today pisses me right the fuck off this is the last time im ever EVER!!!!going to have something like this i will help set one up but i will never NEVER!!!! hold a meet or a get together again unless im helping someone else do it FFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

over the past 8 or so years my life has had more downs then ups and until i was open to myself i never thought i would have made it to where i am now, never thought i would ever be able to have this many friends, or even have the ability to be myself. yeah this is me and how i got here is basically a little hint into my emotionless insanity trip to my current personality. i was always hiding who i was from an early age for i was told i would amount to anything then. after that my life started to fall apart i never thought i would be able to put it back together and then i seen my first fursuit and i wanted to be just like that person in the way suiting. after that i slow became to realize who i wanted to be and i started to get into my life in a way i was enjoying until high school this is when my life fell apart a second time. 3 months into my freshmen year of high school was the beginning of no better way of saying this but the death parade which one after another ppl that were ether family or close friends to the family started to drop one by one in a short period of time. after 4 months i went to 8 funerals and on the 8th i witnessed my first death of someone and at 14 it just throw my life into a spiral of confusion i had no idea how to deal with it. i went into a depression which my parents made worse with their way of thinking about my life(everything i do will fail and i will never get anywhere in life because im nothing like my brother way of thinking). so after 2 years of this my stress got to a point to where my life was at danger and i had my heart stop for the first time(yes it just stopped not a heart attack) and crashed almost hitting a cement slab, 3 trees, a fence , and almost flipped and rolled the car. when my father got to the scene first thing he asked me was "is the car ok" and never asked if anything was wrong with me and then made me drive the broken car home right as he got there. after highschool i worked my ass off working fulltime at mcdanalds and going to college full time which gave me little time for much of anything between studying and working. i went through a year of threats to become homeless for taking tests and working on school work instead of doing house work. i ended up giving up on college and tried for a better job which failed mostly until recently. i ended up working 3 jobs untill i got over whelmed and had to quite one which made my life a little worse by me being around ppl who think im a good for nothing. i went through 2 other jobs(total of 5) until i got my current one which after 3 months of working there i get no free time but in the end it pays off. i recent got into a fight with my parents and after 30 min i won and it came with a prize they got so mad they ended up throwing an offer of a house at me and i took it(its the house i grew up in) which i am soo happy about but im not sure if i will be getting a roommate or not but as of right now i get to fix it up and pay 300 a month for house payments. so as a summery my life went from unsure of what i am capable of to dark after that was death followed by working every second i could to make money to get myself some respect and ended by slightly insane with a 90% chance of being crazy and a dab of extreme geek. (i shouldnt be writing at 2 in the morning when im tired and bored when noone is on to talk to)(im also to lazy to fixed the spelling errors and to make it more proper in the writing department).

[ ] smoked (pot)
[x] consumed alcohol ( a sip)
[x] slept in the same bed with someone of the opposite sex
[x] slept in the same bed with someone of the same sex
[x] kissed someone of the same sex
[x] had sex
[x] had someone in your room other than family
[x] watched porn
[x] bought porn
[ ] tried drugs

TOTAL: 8

[x] taken painkillers (asprin counts, right?)
[ ] taken someone else's prescription medicine
[x] lied to your parents
[x] lied to a friend
[x] snuck out of the house
[x] done something illegal
[x] felt hurt
[x] hurt someone
[x] wished someone to die
[x] seen someone die

TOTAL: 17

[x] missed curfew
[x] stayed out all night
[x] eaten a carton of ice cream by yourself
[x] been to a therapist
[ ] received a ticket
[ ] been to rehab
[ ] dyed your hair
[x] been in an accident
[x] been to a club
[x] been to a bar

TOTAL: 24

[ ] been to a wild party
[ ] been to a Mardi Gras parade
[x] drank more than three alcoholic beverages in a night
[ ] had a spring break in Florida
[ ] sniffed anything
[ ] wore black nail polish
[x] wore arm bands
[ ] wore t-shirts with band names
[x] listened to rap

TOTAL: 27

[x] dressed gothic
[x]dressed girly
[ ] dressed punk
[ ] dressed grunge
[x] stole something
[ ] been too drunk to remember anything
[x] blacked out
[ ] fainted
[x] had a crush on a neighbor

TOTAL: 32

[x] had a crush on a friend
[x] been to a concert
[x] dry-humped someone; been dry humped
[x] been called a slut
[x] called someone a slut
[ ] installed speakers in a car
[x] broken a mirror
[x] showered at someone of the opposites sex's house
[x] brushed your teeth with someone else's toothbrush

TOTAL: 40

[ ] considered Ludacris your favorite rapper?
[x] seen an R-rated movie
[x] cruised the mall
[x] skipped school
[x] had surgery
[x] had an injury
[ ] gone to court
[ ] walked out of a restaurant without paying/tipping
[x] caught something on fire


TOTAL: 46

[ ] owned/rented an apartment/house
[ ] broke the law in the police's presence
[ ] made out with someone who had a GF/BF
[x] got in trouble with the police
[x] talked to a stranger
[x] hugged a stranger
[ ] kissed a stranger
[ ] rode in the car with a stranger
[x] been harassed
[x] been verbally harassed

TOTAL: 51

[x] met face-to-face with someone you met online
[x] stayed online for 5+ hours straight
[ ] talked on the phone for more than 4 hours straight
[x] watched TV for 5 hours straight
[x] been to a fair
[x] been called a bad influence
[ ] drank and drove
[x] prank-called someone
[x] laid on a couch with someone of the opposite sex
[x] cheated on a test

TOTAL: 59

If you have 00-10 ... write [I'm a goody-goody]
If you have 11-20 ... write [I'm still a goody-goody]
If you have 21-30 ... write [I'm average]
If you have 31-40 ... write [I'm a bad kid]
If you have 41-50 ... write [I'm a very bad influence]
If you have 51-60 ... write [I'm a horrible person

can i just leave home and not ever go back now? i am tired of death and thats all everyone is talking about idc how long my gma has ill spend more time with her yes but if the talk keeps up im just going to up and rage quit my family (was going to anyways but this will make me do it sooner) so yeah vent vent vent rant rant rant. and if anyone in my family talks alot about it i might stab them with unicorn horns want watch worms eat their bodies. that is all

atm im having time and drama issues so im thinking of caving(giving up on making it myself) in and just ordering one anyone know any good suit makers that dont cost an arm and a leg im looking for a partial so any help for who makes good cheap ones will be helpful

yeah now looking for a place to stay near my job im tired of being lied about in my family which is being started and passed around by who else but my parents so if you need a roommate and are near the Grand blanc area look me up

I am soooo bored right now so i guess ill answer question any of them to the best of my knowledge (there is no question that i will not try and answer) so if you gots questions i will have some answers

out of shear boredom i started writing and now it has come together and started forming a story so ill probably be posting it up here soon

i love the kind of trolls that use to be friends but then they start to troll you after something that doesnt make since like for me a job now im being told they want to try and get me fired 1) they are being stupid, 2) i know who they are and i can sue them if they do and, 3) they are only attacking me for trying to better myself when they sit on their asses and complain about not being able to get a job or hold a job(they in my eyes are being lazy for complaining about not having jobs when i had multiple opportunities for different jobs by just going out and getting them) and they say jobs are impossible to find cuz they cant find one. Oh trolls that use to be friends, plz smarten up or grow up and go out to have a life/get a job by going out and actually trying to get one so you can leave me alone.