All I'm going to say is that I'm not gonna stand for the drama.

If you wanna still be my friend, great.

If you aren't, then straight up tell me to stay the fuck outta your way.
Cause I'll most likely listen.

I knew a lot of people would be mad and 'butthurt' about the situation but you know what? I'm happy. For once I'm so happy that even my crappy jobs and working 14-15 hours a day can't bring me down. I have someone that listens, that cares, that appriciates. You know there's a journal floating around and that's him dude. I can't ever say thank you enough to him.

So you know what, people that know ME should know I'm not a horrible person out for sex and just to have some dude. I'm not out to destroy friendships or relationships.. It's rare for me to find a guy that I trust completely.. Some people know that I've got a general problem when it comes to guys.. I've been just searching for someone and once I opened my eyes I found that person.

If you think I'm the devil or whatever then fine. You're loss.

Just know I don't want to hear anything more about sides and who's right and who's wrong. I just don't want to be back in high school kthnx. Been outta there for years and don't want to go back.

Thats all I'm gonna say about it.


/angryannoyedrant

GO FLOOD  crushdood WITH HAPPY BIRTHDAYS PLZ<3





:3c

People are so fuckin immature sometimes I swear lol

Anywho, suiting event on Sunday the 24th is still a go! Me, Crush, Keitel, Pharos, and Pharos' bf are going to be the group most likely so far. Anyone else is welcome to join us; in or out of suit. The festival is from 2-5 and we'll be handing out candy<3


In other news, I might be moving outta here finally, quite a bit earlier than I thought. Tonight just sucked at work and I was SO close to just fuckin walking out and never going back. I've just had it here dude.


HNNG
a drunken phone call made me lol and feel better tho<3 :3c Doofus.

Or you dont neeeed to. But I and a friend will be! :D

On Oct. 24th there's a halloween festival in the town I work in, Del Mar. So a friend and I are gonna go suiting~ And I wanted to see if anyone wanted to join us :3

Got a new phone<3 I have the same number~

Ah so happy~ No more paying out the ass for texting lol

Time for sleeps though~ Night guys~

What special stuff is going on around halloween time? I wanna go Smile-suiting :C Baaad. His new head is too gorgous not to go scare children with.

So I was talking to the lady at a parking garage exit late last night.

I'd never met this women before but she gave me a bright smile, something I rarely see in San Diego. I handed over my parking ticket and my debit card. For those who haven't seen my debit card, it's one of the Wildlife Associations cards through Bank of America with a panda on it.

The women looked at my cards and seemed so happy about the fact there was a panda on it and said that I might like animals. I, of course, said yes. So she continued to tell me about a gorilla that recently had to be put to sleep at the San Diego Zoo.

This gorilla was old and was the first born in the zoo. She apparently suffered from horrible athritis and in the end, the zookeepers wanted to no longer see her suffer to do everyday tasks..

But the saddest part of that story was that the other gorilla's would actually have the old one stay put and would bring her food and anything they could to help her feel better.

The women at the ticketbooth said that maybe we all could learn a thing or two from those gorillas.


And what I told her in response seemed to send her back a little.

I told her that I wish more people would learn to look around for one another. To show they care. To have some sense of humanity..

She took a step back and paused for a few seconds before handing me my card and my receipt and saying "Thank you... Have a nice night.." I thanked her and smiled before driving off home.

In San Diego, people are rude.. People don't give one shit about the guy sitting next to them. But you know what... it's not only in San Diego. Its around the world. There's just more people here to notice it more.

Care about people. Even if you don't know them.. if you see someone fall, help them up. If someone looks lost, ask where they're headed.


I don't know.. I thought it was interesting that the woman looked so taken back when I actually said that in response..

I broke the screen on my phone somehow... :|




wtf



SRSLY?! ;~;

Idk bumping out that other journal xD Hooves are sold basically.

hnnggg im tired, its hot, im bummed, shoulder is in pain, work was crazy. D; I cant wait for my day off.. Seriously.

BUT I did get a good opinion on why I get sick randomly xD Its cause I dont eat enough.. I dont eat breakfast cause I never really have time to make something that isnt sugarfilled cereal. I dont get to eat lunch usually cause I'm working. Dont eat dinner often cause Im working. My double days are the worst especially on busy days like today DX Thankfully a guy from work made me some food.. But that was the only meal I'd had all day xD;

I need to eat more ;; Not effecting my weight at all though so thats probably good? I always stay a constant 145lbs. But hopefully eating more than one meal a day will help XD; Makes sense though cause when I was in NC I'd eat all the time and I never got sick. Back when I was in FL I barely ate at my dads and would get sick. SO Thats probably all thats been the problem xD; How lame!

FFFFFFFUUUUUCK
I should go to bed LOL




brb turning on the AC
even if my mom will throw a bitchfit. ITS TOO HOT IN HERE.

NIGHT BITCHS<3

Wanting some extra money so I'm going to sell my goat hooves. I never use them anymore since I stopped using Air as a sona xD She didnt last.

http://www.furaffinity.net/view/3404092/

So spread the word? ;; Idk how much.. best offer.

So my friend  devhalena really needs help. She hasn't been able to find a new job and the end othe month is almost upon her; meaning rent, bills, etc. So even if you can't buy one of her amazing, adorable charms I'm just asking to make a journal and spread her name around FA.

I gave her a donation but I have my own bills coming up also so I can't really help anymore than asking other to help ;~;

She's a really nice and amazing person and I'd feel awful for her to loose her apartment or something D; SO SPREAD THE WORD!

Journal about the charms are here: http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/1600245/

I hate when I get nervous about stuff.. Makes me think too much and worry about things DX


Anyways, if anyone wants to, Smile's own account is here;  smilefag That is where I will be posting ALL of Smile's stuff and artwork and his new head when it is completed.


Now back to listening to my mom bitch that she's broke :| ...shoulda taken that 19$ an hour job huh bitch. >:C

https://youtu.be/kWBOWbAzfuM



OOOOH JAPAAAAAN


BTW

I just got a call for an interview for a REAL CHEF FULL TIME JOB FFFFFFFFF
I go in at 9:30 tomorrow!

I CAN FINALLY QUIT MY NIGHT JOB ;;

plus... F5 if it hasnt changed, BATMAAAAAAN

So I'm working on an account just for all the things Smile related! :3 I've got a ton of Smile shit and I want to make sure I hold onto it all! Plus Smile's new head is making great progess and hopefully I will have plenty of fursuiting pictures to put up there of new AND old Smile<3 I just dont want to flood people if they dont want to see just Smile shit, ya know?

I will post the new account tomorrow after I've uploaded stuff so I dont flood the watchers.

I'd do it now but shit.. I'm exhausted. Long weekend of working hard nonstop and was worrying about shit. But it's all over and everything is good. Not until next weekend do I have to work like 40 hours in three days xD; AUGH. But I'm still going! Thanks to everyone that sends me happy text messages an shit to keep me smiling through work<3

Also..

As far as MFF goes, I'll be buying my ticket soon. I'll be going to IL on the monday before MFF probably and leaving most likely the monday after we've checked outta the hotel.

However.. I'm a tad worried about the room.. I'll be honest, I'm afraid of unnessicary drama and overcrowdedness. As of right now, I think this is the lineup I've come up with. Me, Red, Skippy, Skippy's friend. MAYBE one of my friends. Idk if she's going. Plus you gotta add on my Smile partials. I say partials because I might take Ifus' head with me too to give it some lovins. but no fullsuit of Smile. I also MIGHT have my Red XIII suit with me for the hell of it since the maker is going to be there. I dont know if I'll take him though cause hes still missing the markings and bracelets. Might just hold him off till MegaCon in March. Also, MIGHT have Itsu back by then. Depends on a lot of things. And Itsu is a big suit, and those who have seen her know I'm a lot smaller than I seem in that suit with her big legs and stuff<3

I also might have a new actual chef position making American style foods for a bunch of elderly people :3 American is simple and really my specialty. LOVE ME SOME SHEPARDS PIE<3 Easy shit = American food. So wish me luck guys! The lady will probably call me tomorrow!~

My dad is coming to visit in Oct on the the 19th and I'm actually kinda excited. I havent been able to show any family that cares the jobs I work and shit D; And I get a few days off! And get to stay in some place in Oceanside~

Then MFF, then Christmas, then Megacon, then MOVING! Those are my main saving-money-for things. Ugh I cant wait to move ;;

But ya! That's life so far. Hope everyone's good. ILU ALL<3

HEY GUYS

I went to six flags yesterday~ Was super fun~ :D Even though I have kinda a fear of rollercoasters I went on most of them. Including this one where the seats move a whole 360 degrees x_____X HOOOLLYFUUUUCK!

I thought I was going to die!~

But Im doing well as far as life goes! Actually really well. I'm getting plenty of hours and catching up with my bills. Im SO proud of myself this month because I was actually able to pay ALL my bills this month. ALL of them ;~; You cant imagine how happy that makes me!

And I'm starting to save my money for a few trips! MFF is quickly approuching and I will probably be taking another trip somewhere in Dec~ :3 Aaaand then in March I have probably at least a trip to FL for Megacoin and possibly moving. But there's a chance I wont move to FL. For those that know D< SHHH. Im srs guiz.

But ya~ Life is geeeeeeeeewd<3

HOW YOU ALL DOING? :D

Anyone else use it that I know on here? >:C IF SO you should add me: Itsumuffin

Cause I luh talkin to people D; even if its just text stuff but I have AIM for that! Talking is fuuun~

I was supposed to go suiting by I got delayed at work and I have no energy to go ;~; Im sorry guys.. next time! I realized that I've gone almost a full month without a day off xD; Saaaad.. YET IM STILL GOIN STRONG C8

So ya!

Home for like.. 10 minutes cause it was slow at my first job xD

So my question is though.. has anyone gotten a package from Canada before? So the girl I commissioned sent my package of Smile's partial stuff on 8/25.. according to the tracking code it was accepted into the US on 8/27.. Its 9/3 D; and she said it should have been here on Tuesday.. ;~;

Is this normal or did the postal services loss that package ;;

So I need some airbrushing done for a suit but I myself do not know how nor will I have the time and patience for that xD;

Anyone in SoCal able to airbrush some markings on a suit for me? :D I'll pay youuu~

Doesnt need to be now.. Just before Feb when I want to go to FL for MegaCon :3 <3

HEY ALL!

So I wanted to thank everyone I got to meet on Sunday<3 I really had a great time being able to hang out with people again since I've been so busy with work and the plain fact that I dont really know anyone in CA.

Life is starting to work out better now that im working both my jobs. I love working at the burger place<3 and the fact that both places are in the same shopping center makes it super easy. Tips at the burger place are gooood though too xD

I've got money that Im starting to set aside money for different things now and that makes me happy to be able to actually start saving money.


Oh! So I'm wanting to get another reptile. I miss my boa that I wasn't able to take with me when I moved. And yesterday I saw this really awesome looking chinese water dragon lizard.. so I've been looking into them more. I guess they are very tameable? and not aggressive so it might be perfect <3 and its not too big for my tiny apartment and not too small to where I'd loose it constantly D8 What do you all think? What kinda lizard should I get? Ive always loved larger reptiles like my boa D8 But I dont thinki I should get a snake this time. And iguana's can be aggressive little monsters lol


AAAAND

HEY EVERYONE! Go commission  rhia <33333
She needs moneh (to buy red dead redemption to play wiff me :3c )
But ya! Go commission huuuuuuurrr cause shes plain AWESOME.

..I think thats all I've got D8
Oh and I'm going to Six flags on the 11th C8 Some dude from work's birthday xD So me and a few of his friends are goin to six flags on the 11th and exploring L.A. on the 12th!

BYE GUUUIZ




PS

BASKETBAAAWL

I figured I would just go ahead and go after work.

I get off around 1-1:30 so I'll probably be there around 2ish. Depending on where the place is. I've never been so I'll have to look up the directions.

Smile's head is all fixed up and looking FAAAAB C:

So I'll be wearin partial Smile tomorrow some of the bit of time I'll be there.

Thinking I should get some drinks to bring. I might run to wal-mart now cause I want to get away from the computer lol Get some fresh air. jeeeeeeez people


I might buy red dead redemtion or however you spell it C8

Anyone going that I know? I might be able to go to some of it, I'd be late probably depending on if my training at work keeps me there but I'd like to go but not so much if I dont really know anyone going D8 I might wear Smile as a partial. Just gotta fix him up a bit.

So whos going ;;

Oh jeez I only just saw this commercial the other night with my mom and I lol'd so hard.


ANYWAYS :D

In a few weeks there will be a new foam head uploaded depending on my work schedules an such. I'm going to also redo Virgil's head sometime. I think it was a good start but the tan fur is crap and doesnt shave down well at all. So Virgil will be getting a new design so I can get different fur.


Also coming soon is a new Smile ref! I need to clean my room and find where I put my tablet pen THIS TIME lol so I can ink and color it but that'll have all his new information (including his two lovely men<3) and with a slight design change. Nothing big, just the red scratchlines on his neck are gone.

As well as a ref for Ian, my new lionman, and Charlie will finally get an anthro ref ;D


I am learning German! I've been wanting to learn a new language and was going to do Russian but goddamn, that shit is confusing and makes no sense. So I chose German! And I'm doing quite well with it c: I can't wait to learn more now xD


MFF room is settled and FULL C: So that makes me happy.


I'm also starting to write again.. going to make it a goal to write Smile's story that I had. And I'm thinking of doing it audiobook style xD Even though my voice isn't all that great but audiobooks are awesome for me to see where I should make changes.

But you know what I miss?

The times when I was like 15 and roleplayed a lot :C I miss rping sometimes cause it'd keep me busy and keep my imagination going.

Anyways,

Hope everyone is well~ Off to work I gooooo!

And probably going to drink with co-workers afterwards C8

GO PLAY IT AND VOTE FOR FLUX <333

http://www.furaffinity.net/view/4287130

Logic is for lame people!

Don't use logic! Think with emotion or hormones! That'll get you far in life!




....Really.

People annoy the SHIT out of me when they don't think about things. When people make up lies to "make you feel better" but when you see the true intention, it makes the situation worse. Or even better when people lies to make themselves feel better. Or when people turn my logic into something utterly stupid.

Sometimes it just sucks to see that glimpse of the TRUE person underneath their image maybe,

Humans can be disgusting little creatures huh

I just needed to get that off my chest <3



In other news, I actually had a bit of energy today! Its weird.. Yesterday I aws so sick and even had a horrible headache but today.. I had energy at work. It felt amazing~ Now that we're starting to see what this is and changing my diet and adding certain vitamins and supplements.. I'm slowly starting to feel better physically. Other than being kinda ticked off, I'm pretty mentally well now too. My stress level is going way down for the most part.


Still trying to figure out whats going on for MFF but I'll talk to Red tomorrow. RED, IM ME ON MSN PLZ ;;

I swear I am.


Just working both jobs now and don't have time for computer really. Any spare time I have I'm usually playing games on my xbox lol

I'm still sick but my mom finally talked to her doctor friend and we're kinda.. experiementing things to see what it is without me having to actually pay to get some tests done for now. Lame huh. But we'll get to the bottom of it sometime. I can't really imagine woking on any fursuit stuff right now though sadly. So that all will have to wait.

Might have some art to post sometime, depending if I find where I put my tablet pen THIS TIME. Ugh lol


Nothings really new though cept starting that other job which is super easy, just talks up all my other time but oh weeell.

In the process of fixing up my profile and stuff.


Time to start saving to get my Itsu suit back! Shouldn't take but a few weeks. Plus there will be a surprise at MFF!


Still trying to figure out the rooming stuff for MFF D8 if you were interested let me know, so I can talk to Red about the possible people.



NOW OFF TO CLEAN MY ROOM!