I cannot tolerate Elon Musk anymore and I will not support his platform.

I've created a Telegram channel for writing announcements. It will be more or less the same kind of feed my twitter account was, but without the infinite scroll sucking hours of my attention.

https://t.me/authorsJLStNOBOTSagenar
https://t.me/authorsJLStNOBOTSagenar
https://t.me/authorsJLStNOBOTSagenar

(remove the NOBOTS part from the address)

I’m sleeping worse than ever since I started antidepressants, and the swelling in my feet is becoming worrisome. I think anxiety is getting worse, too, gradually since I took my first dose last week.

I just want to sleep. Please let me sleep. This does not feel like progress.

I want to be normal. I want to feel normal. I want to reclaim that feeling of being able to do anything, conquer anything. I haven’t slept a whole night through in a week. Anxiety seems to increase when I take the pill.

Doctor said to try taking the pill in the morning instead of evening and see if that helps. Fair enough. Complex problems often have simple solutions.

Having a very difficult time concentrating on anything. All I want to do is stare at the wall and listen to music. I want to write, but thoughts don’t coalesce.

I’m waiting to feel normal again. I’ll settle for feeling “ok.” When does that start?

It’s been a productive year.

I published everything I wanted to release under both names.

Completing my series is a huge accomplishment.

Releasing two new tagenar books is also a huge feat because I am so happy with how both of them turned out. CCS | Solid Magic

Having Deity Theory reprinted in the Furry Megapack was also a thrill. It really does feel like something I did will be preserved for future generations, right up there with Best in Show. The Tech is in Zooscape, and I’m so happy that dark piece of fiction is out there now.

In terms of writing and publishing, it’s been a good year.

Lousy for everything else, but good for writing.

I'll be on a few panels at AC this year as both Tagenar and James L. Steele.

https://anthrocon2019.sched.com/

I have nothing to say. I'll just be stripping to my underwear and dancing on the table for an hour.

See you there!

Furry Book Month may be over, but due to a small misunderstanding on my part, the Barnes and Noble edition of Dangerous Thoughts will be on sale this month!

For a limited time, book 1 of the Archeon series will be 12.99 instead of 15!

Support a struggling small business and shop someplace besides the usual one.

https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/da.....=9781732282407
https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/da.....=9781732282407
https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/da.....=9781732282407

Furry Book month is half over. Snatch your copy of Dangerous Thoughts now, while it's on sale!

Available at B&N: https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/da.....ele/1128789688
(print edition price cut is delayed, sorry)

Also available through Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/dp/1732282404

Cover art by  ThemeFinland
Editing by  poetigress


Don't forget about my Furplanet books. They're on sale, too.
Huvek: https://furplanet.com/shop/item.aspx?itemid=729

Tagenar stuff: https://furplanet.com/shop/search.a.....search=tagenar

*
*
*

Spacetime can be navigated by thought.

500 miles. 500 light years. It’s all the same to an Archeon.

Choose your destination wisely.


Every raptor needs a fox.

Without a raptor, a fox is a violent animal.

Keep your fox close in these frightening times.

I'm long past due to post a new journal.

I'm sure some of you out there remember I exist and are interested in more than just porn.

For those of you who want adventure in your lives, I have a new book in print.

DANGEROUS THOUGHTS

It's for adults, but not explicitly "adult."

It's the kind of science fiction I've always wanted to read but have found only in very limited quantities, even within the furry world. Science Fiction that features nonhuman characters as the leads instead of the companions, or the sidekicks, or the NPCs, or the villains.

I wrote it to recapture a piece of my childhood. My friends and I created entire imaginary worlds and acted them out, totally improvised, no planning. We would just start doing things and a world and story would emerge out of nothing. Live Action Role-playing at recess--chapter plays happening day after day, all the kids involved picking up where we left off the previous recess.

As a child, I was drawn to other kids who could share these imaginary worlds with me, both in school and away from it. Almost everyone I knew did things like this. My friends outside of school were exceptionally good at it; we created entirely new identities for ourselves, villains to fight, often playing ourselves, the villains, and each other, jumping back and forth as needed. We'd play off each other, and a story would emerge out of nothing. Sometimes they would fizzle out, but sometimes they would take off and become epic.

Join me for the beginning of a new epic adventure inspired by the childhood worlds I acted out with my friends.

A velociraptor (utahraptor, for those in the know) and a fox traveling from planet to planet to save civilization from collapsing.

As the series progresses, its scope only gets larger until it eventually involves not just the fate of the universe, but the multiverse.


More info:

https://www.goodreads.com/book/show.....erous-thoughts

...and...

https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/da.....ele/1128789688

...and...

https://www.amazon.com/dp/1732282404


Begin reading:

(my blog) http://daydreamingintext.blogspot.c.....ming-soon.html

...or...

http://www.furaffinity.net/view/27522082/

...or...

https://www.sofurry.com/view/1337911

...or...

http://www.furaffinity.net/view/27522100/

It's taken me a very long time to write this, and I feel like everything I've written prior was mere preparation to write this series. If you're like me, and you want that part of your childhood back--the part that brimmed with imagination and you were eager to share those imaginary worlds with others--check it out!

I just found out a new Unreal Tournament is in development.

https://www.epicgames.com/unrealtournament/

I see they've changed the design of the Skaarj... again. They look like humans with tusks now. Is it really too much to ask that the Skaarj remain as sexy as they were in UT2K4?

http://gameswalls.com/unreal-tourna.....kaarj/1024x768

It's still in alpha stage, so there's hope.

I used to play UT. I was never very good at it, and it got routine way too quickly (spawn, die, spawn, die, spawn, kill, die...), so I have no plans to start playing it again, but if the Skaarj were hot, that might have been a selling point!

Night in the Woods. Wow... This is quite an experience in an indie game.



Mae has just dropped out of college, and she returns home to Possum Springs, an old mining town that has fallen on hard times.

Unlike most adventure games, Mae--the player--doesn't have amnesia. She knows everyone in town, and she wants to reconnect with them. She's only been away 2 years, but she discovers everything is different.

Nothing is quite as she remembers. The people are depressed, and everyone walks around with a chip on their shoulder because Possum Springs is drying up. Jobs are fleeing, people are out of work, and those who have a job can't make a decent living.

All Mae's old school friends are working crap jobs, and they seem to have grown up, and bitter. Everyone has matured except Mae. She is trapped between childhood and adulthood, and she doesn't know how to cross from one to the other.

Something strange is going on in Possum Springs. Something strange is happening to Mae...

The game is incredibly well-written. You get to know these people and their extensive histories so well you really do care about them. Even when they're doing mundane things, somehow they're interesting. Everyone has a defined personality, and their dialogue reads so fluid and natural.

Night in the Woods is pretty much an interactive cutscene. Think "To The Moon." Very little gaming to do, but the story it tells is so interesting, and the characters are so much fun to get to know, that I didn't care.

(There's always Demon Tower to satisfy the bloodlust after reading all that dialogue.)

The story thoroughly engrossed me, and I did not expect it to. It's engaging, funny, and more mature than I expected. Two of Mae's friends are openly gay! Mae was apparently a little criminal as a kid, and slipping into that role now was a strange experience. There are even political undertones in the story.

It's easy to get lost in this town for hours at a time. Not because the town is massive and interesting to explore. (It's actually quite small, and while there are some things to do apart from the current "mission," I wouldn't call it open-world. These side-tasks do affect the narrative in subtle ways though.) Rather, Mae's childhood friends are so much fun! I wanted to spend time with all of them! I even felt bad when I went with one and not the others because I wanted to get to know all of them!

My only complaints are... sprite slowdown?! Really?! More than a dozen polygons on screen at once, and the game slows down?! No excuse for that. And... loading screens... Lots of them... And some events are quicktime, but the buttons on screen do not match my controller. It told me to press button 8, or 9, or 6, but my gamepad is labeled A, B, X, Y. Never did fully memorize which was which. These are hardly game-breaking issues though.

It tells the story of this generation. Kids who aren't allowed to grow up as their parents did, and they don't know how. An economy that no longer seems to be working for anyone has made socialists out of an entire generation of young people, and even some of the older fellows. Surprising to see this in a game story, and it very clearly captures the times.

This is quite a story. Smart, nuanced, and even profound. It pulled me in and never let me go. If you can enjoy a novel disguised as a game, this is a must-play.

My computer is not strong enough to run Fallout 4, I don't have a PS4, and I don't have the money to upgrade to either. However will I get through winter without a warm Deathclaw embrace??

My brain has been in a fog since I finished Garth's story ( http://furplanet.com/shop/item.aspx?itemid=805 ), and the trilogy prior. It always happens to me after a major project. In the past, I went entire years without writing I exhausted myself so thoroughly.

I've been kicking around a few ideas though. Since I can't seem to write anything, here's a glimpse into my brain:

1
Straight guy has high sex drive. Searches for women for years who can keep up with him, goes to brothels, buys hookers. Eventually he meets another man who has a drive as high as his, and before he knows it, he's doing the gay thing.

Not much of a concept, I know. Might be a detail inside a larger story, not the story itself. Could be a more romantic take on the whole thing, instead of my usual fetishy muscle stuff. Risks being too similar to Jake's List ( http://furplanet.com/shop/item.aspx?itemid=531 ), but it could be a new angle to explore the dynamic.

2
A novel-length expansion of the Savior concept from Jake's List. Though it's only a video game within the book, I had started to build a universe unto itself with that. I tried writing it years ago, but gave up because I couldn't figure out the logic of what was happening.

Game concepts don't always make logical sense, and trying to make a serious story around an overly-muscled lion who cuts people to bits to free their souls isn't easy to rationalize, but I do think there is a serious story in there. I haven't given up thinking I could make something good of it.

(... if "the muscular, warrior lion" wasn't already a cliche in the furry world. Come on, the male lion is one of the least warriorly animals we know--why do we have this image of him as a fighter?? It's only by virtue of his size! We think surely someone with that much muscle wouldn't have more in common with Garfield than a gladiator! Reality is so disappointing, which is why we have furry!)

I dunno if I would make this an adult story for my Tagenar name, or a serious, real-name fantasy/sci-fi story along the lines of Huvek ( http://furplanet.com/shop/item.aspx?itemid=729 ). I tend to think the idea is too serious for a Tagenar story, but perhaps it's time Tagenar wrote something besides slice-of-life gay muscle stories.

Sometimes maintaining two names seems more trouble than it's worth.

3
Another Tagenar story idea explores the emotions of transgenderism. But instead of showing them directly, change them to being trans-species.

I'm thinking a horse never felt right about being a horse. He likes the water way too much, and he wants to be an otter. Going through the physical changes makes him happy, but also alienates a lot of his friends.

This is an idea that will require a lot of research to avoid becoming ridiculous and insulting. It involves emotions I myself have not felt, and this is always dangerous.

It's just an idea, and it may or may not be something I will pursue. There's a lot of potential in this one, but I dunno if there's enough story for a full novel. Might be a short story.

*

I can't think about these things right now. I'm in pain, and I'm still in a fog after finishing the last trilogy, plus Garth's story on top of that. Ideas are all I have right now, and until I have recharged, I am going to let them cook.

happy.

My novel Huvek is now available through Bad Dog Books

http://baddogbooks.com/?product=huvek

Though the printed word will be champion in the future, this passing fad that is digital distribution is appropriate for the present

http://www.jameslsteele.com

Prelude to the new book coming out. Feels good to have a homepage

Working on edits to the new novel. Finally. This is why I made this account in the first place, and things are moving forward at last. Should hopefully have something to show here in the near future.

Edits are hard, but every book needs 'em. I can't catch all my echoes and leftovers from previous drafts on my own.

Allasso 3 has finally arrived. My story, "On the Surface" has been a long time coming. It's probably the most "furry" story I've published to date, and I am I pleased with how it turned out. I was out of my element with the subject matter, but I enjoyed how it played out.

http://pinkfoxpublications.net/on-the-surface/

Hope you enjoy it, too.

I'm tired of thinking I should be doing something productive. Always should be doing something else--no matter what I do, it's never the thing I should be doing right now.

I always get like this right before I'm ready to write again. Can't give attention to anything. Even when reading I feel like I should be doing something else. Reading, playing games, watching TV or what have you, I always get the feeling that I'm not doing what I'm supposed to be doing, so I tend to bounce from one thing to another, unable to commit to any one thing for very long. Everything I do, except writing a novel. Writing novels is the only time I don't feel like I'm wasting my time and I need to be doing something else.

Just have to wait it out. My head will clear up eventually and then I'll be ready to do things again. It hasn't always been this way. Just the last few years I get like this. I binge for months on a project, then take a few months off and start again. But in the last few years, I started to grapple with this new feeling. I miss the days before I started feeling like this. More than ever, I want these cycles to end.

If there's a name for this feeling, someone please tell me. I look forward to the other side, when it passes and I'm ready to focus on things again.

New short story is published, and the issue is released. Fictionvale volume 2. My story is Beneath a Sponsored Sky. Though the issue theme is "space western" my story is not a space western, rather general science fiction.


The old man sat on a chair on his back porch, rocking back and forth, staring at the grass. He would have liked to look at the stars, but there were none to see. He refused to look at the animated images and logos in the sky. Decades ago, he convinced himself that turning his head to the ground was an act of rebellion, like the mute button on the TV once was.

So the old man watched the plain, motionless grass while above him, behind the sparse clouds, animated cartoon characters danced, company logos flashed and rotated and flipped, dramatic text scrolled and zoomed in and out. Five hundred individual regions in this hemisphere, each displaying its own animation against a black background that simulated the night sky of old. Some sequences were as long as five minutes, others as short as a couple seconds, looping again and again and again from sundown to sunup.

As a boy, the old man clearly remembered sitting on the porch with his father under a cloudless night sky and the land would be pale white under the moonlight. The Earth was no longer illuminated by the moon at night. Now the trees and grass glowed faintly red from the light of a corporate logo above. The old man sighed, as he did every night that he pondered it.

Movement out the corner of his eye caught his attention.

…


It's been a long time coming and I really like how this story turned out. Check it out on Fictionvale's official site!

or if you prefer Amazon, check it out there, too.

New from Bourbon Penn: Whiteness


As far as I can see there is only whiteness. If I could move my head, I would say that the whiteness encircles me. Perspective smudges the vast distance I cannot comprehend into meaningless white space. I've always thought that empty space should be black. Pure white is just as empty, but there is a greater illusion of distance because it is lighted. I need the light to see the nothingness. Without seeing it, the immensity of emptiness in front of me would have no meaning. …


http://www.bourbonpenn.com/issue/09.....s-l-steele.php


It's a surreal, bizarre story based on an old childhood drawing of mine. I still have the drawing. Maybe I'll scan it and share it with the world someday.

I begin the new year with 4 stories in slushpiles.

I begin the new year with money in savings.

I begin the new year with 4 stories pending publication.

I begin the new year with renewed hope for a novel in print.

I begin the new year with most of my oldest idea written.

It's a good start.

I'm making too many mistakes. I don't think I can carry this to the end. I have written 270,000 words altogether and it's time to admit I am exhausted and I have shut down. Too much can change when I draft this project, so any ending I write may become obsolete. I think it's better to end this session now.

I cannot write the ending, which pisses me off because I want to FINISH! I want to reach the END! My oldest idea--my biggest idea!--I want to finish it and I can't. I am just plain worn out. As much as I want to push through to the end, I shouldn't. I pretty much know how the series will conclude, but first I need to make sure everything that came before it is solid.

So I have concluded this first push. Been writing since September 6. What a haul that was.

And what am I doing? I don't have a publisher, and I'm writing all this?? What the fuck am I doing?

Been writing new books based on my oldest idea. Finished book one a month ago, at about 108,000 words. Just today I finished book two of the series, ending at 99,500 words. Both first draft.

Feels foolish to write so much at once. Only makes it harder to get it published, but I don't care. This needs to be written.

On to the third book. I'm making my oldest idea real. Finally.

An acceptance letter, and a contract signed for an anthology. Probably won't be released for some time, but it's a victory! Another story coming soon!

Having been through the novel-writing process five times in the last ten years, I'm not surprised I'm procrastinating. The novellas I wrote in that same time span were much less intimidating. A few months and BAM, finished! The full novels... they take SO LONG, and they are so INVOLVED. I'm scared to do it again, knowing what lies ahead.

I need to begin. I've been hesitating for too long. I'm not doing anything else, and I'm tired of talking about writing. Time to do it again. Time to make it real.

I have plenty of books to read between writing sessions. Short story collections, actually. No more games, but those are only a click away if need be. It's time to stop bouncing around aimlessly on the net for hours at a time listening to music. It's time to get to work again.

But I dread the life-sucking WORK that lies ahead. I dread the HAUL and the COMMITMENT and the EFFORT! Novellas are nice and quick, short stories are a breeze, but a big idea... Man, how did I start off writing novels and then progress to shorter works??

So, here I go again. No matter what happens, I'm about to put my oldest idea onto paper.

Who the fuck is going to publish talking animal horror?! Next to impossible to sell a furry story outside the furry world, but I try anyway just in case I'm wrong.