Hello everyone,

I'm sure many who have my discord already know that I was recently hacked and were sent a link to a group. This link is a hack that spreads it to others as I found out the hard way. I do have my account back though and its all been changed to stop it from continuing and added more security to beef up my account.

Any who have blocked or removed me for security purposes please add me back cause I have resolved the issue and just cleaning up the mess now to those that have already gotten the link.

The name of the group changes so yeah don't open it cause it will ask you to verify which triggers it.

I hope everyone in my discord sees this and adds me back so I can get things resolved fully.

I have been trying to search online and have not found any solid results regarding finding a 3D rigged Charmeleon that is ready for VR Chat usage. I'm willing to purchase from someone who could create one who knows how to do so.

If there is anyone who is familiar with VR Chat and how their Avatars work I would love to get more information and would gladly discuss commissioning a custom 3D Charmeleon model, one with a chubby belly and butt if possible.

Hehe, just putting out a post saying that my Birthday is tomorrow. Turning 27...geeze that old already XD

Heh, as you most likely see I don't put new journals up very often. However today is a day that one needs to be written.

Today is October 16th, 2016 For me this is a day I will never forget because exactly one year ago today my mom died. She died at 11:30 pm October 16th, 2015. So when it hits 11:30 pm here in a short time, that will be the exact one year anniversary of her death.

Overall this day has been a good one despite it being the anniversary of such a dreadful event. I am thinking about her a lot today just because I miss her a great deal. Part of me still doesn't want to accept it in that I still have dreams that make me believe she is still alive or somehow came back.

Anyway, I just wanted to put this out here to mark this day. A day of Remembrance for my mother.

Mmm well after a long time of not playing I started to play again within this past month, got a team of 6 friends who have started a new clan called Furries Unite.

I'm putting this journal out there wanting to see if anyone that I know or may come across this if they used to or currently play Runescape.

Its been highly revamped versus where it was just a couple of years ago and would help us out a lot if we could find more players to join our clan there. The more we get the more powerful the clan citadel can become. So drop a message here if anyone used to play RS and may be interested in joining a clan that is aimed to be a furries clan within that game.

I just wanted to put this out there to give everyone an update about how hard things have been. My mother had Cancer and up till last night we thought we were winning the battle.....

However last night......she passed away.....

She died in front of me and I...held her hand.....in her last moments told her I loved her, that I knew she loved me...that I would be alright and can live on which is what she told me she wanted to hear when she died long before she was even sick. The most important person in my life is gone and ill never see her again till I die myself.

I gave her the last send off that she wanted and I took care of her the best I could. Just wasn't enough I guess..... I couldn't save her.....

So yeah.....I don't know how I'm gonna get through this right now, but I got help which im thankful for.

I don't normally write these kind of journals much cause I'm a very private person when it comes to my feelings on things. However, I just need to let off some steam so I am writtng this to help myself.

I guess I'll start by quoting The Godfather. "Bonasera, Bonasera. What have I ever done to make you treat me so disrespectfully?"

I quote this cause its the same question I have mostly. What have I ever done to make people treat me so disrespectfully? Sure, I know many that do treat me with the respect I deserve and I am very grateful for that. But what bothers me is that it seems that some for no given reason at all just either up and remove me, or stop talking to me, saying shit about me behind my back to other mutual friends. I just can't help but wonder. Why? I mean, I would understand it if I had done something that would warrant such actions. If I treated them in a similar manner but I didn't.

I know, many will say I should just let it go and not care anymore. But its hard to do that when you felt very close to someone and they just up and let you go for no reason. If I didn't care about them so much then it wouldn't hurt at all. Kinda makes me wish I didn't care. I mean, to me its like how can someone be so cold and emotionless to just crush a friendship without so much as a word?

Maybe someday I can forgive them enough so I can move on and feel at peace. But for now, I just don't know how I can.

On a final note, boggles my mind how some people can be total jerks to strangers whom are trying to be nice to em but whatever that is their loss then.

I have many people on my skype list, I constantly get messages which is hard to keep up with on top of my rl obligations. Maybe my list is too big, not something I planned but I don't want to say sorry cant add ya because Ive got enough to deal with.

So, now I'm left having issues with replying to everyone and some perhaps feel I don't care about them or feel like I'm ignoring them, I swear I'm not trying to intentionally ignore anyone. I am sorry to everyone that I have made feel like I don't want to talk to em or don't care about them because that isn't true. I care a great deal and it upsets me when I know I'm unable to give enough time to my friends.

All I can say is, I'm very sorry.

Hehe, wow, this Friday ill be turning 25 years old. Unreal, I seriously am starting to feel so old! Hehe that and how long its been since became a member here boggles my mind cause I don't feel like ive been around that long |3

But yeah, this char is getting older very soon, good bye 24 come Friday :3

Heh well, I guess it's high time I wrote a new journal having been 8 months since Ive written the last one lol.

Well, what am I thankful for? Well lets see, I am thankful for the friends in my life that I know love and care about me, and I love and care about them deeply. The world sometimes seems like a really dark, cold and heartless place, but all of the friends I know here and the one's Ive met else where online, even the real life ones I haven't seen for years, you all are the reason I keep getting up and moving on regardless of the hard times ahead. You all give me the strength and the willpower overcome every obstacle that is handed to me. For that I am truly grateful and will always be thankful for that. ^^

Heheheh, hard to believe really, next Thursday, March 13th ill be 24, I'm so old!!! Mrffff I still cant even fathom that I'm now the age some of the first people I called friends here were when I first met them |D

Just unbelievable, where have the years gone seriously! x3

Well, I am looking forward to the holiday that is Thanksgiving, even with it just being my mom and I, it reminds me of what to be thankful for in my life. I'm thankful everyday but, this is the day that symbolizes thankfulness :3 That and ill probably over eat on the feast |D

Honestly to be honest, a lot of people over this past several months have made feel like at one point or another that I shouldn't be around, or not wanted as much anymore, and even flat out forgotten. So all in all, i'm just tried of caring anymore. Just am.

Why can't I stop being haunted by the memories of my past, why can't I just be free from within myself?

I have no idea how I'll ever answer those questions.

Heh, at last the day comes, today is my birthday!!! Now I am 23 years old, I can barely believe it honestly lol To me it doesn't feel like it was that long ago that I turned 21 and was able to drink haha but its been two years since, time really can move before you know it for sure.

Anyway, I just want to say that I'm excited to be 23 and that I am thankful for having all the friends that Ive made here on FA. You guys mean the world to me and I'll always be grateful that I met you all ^^ Friendships are the most important thing in my life and even when its not my birthday its always a gift to have em :3

I really need help in identifying what character is portrayed in this photo.

http://media.steampowered.com/steam.....d38d3_full.jpg


If anyone knows please help!

Well, well, after all this time I finally found someone that I really care for and he really cares for me too. X3 He used to be a member on this site that goes by  Tendo

He is such a sweet Char and we found we had a lot in common and are very similar in personality~

It will be awhile before we get to see eachother in person, but in the meantime online I will be spending a lot of time with my new hunny. X3

Hey everyone, Scorch the Charmeleon here with some awesome news. I have been chosen to wield the keyblade! lol

At least in a sense that's true thanks to the amazing artist  RedWolfInukozo also known as Shiba and to  LonePikachuas known as Nick requesting her to make it. ^^

Just wanted to post this journal to say how much I love the piccy and that it feels like a whole new world now to have my fursona truly come to life!!

Once again, thank you both so much and I am just so grateful to you both! To those who see this piccy please take a look at Shiba's art, she really is very talented and this pic she made me is proof of that! Also, visit my buddy Nick, he is a really nice Pikachu and a really good person to know. ^^

Charidian is doing a drawing later today, if you want a chance in getting a free charm please click this link! http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/3503435/

Hope anyone who reads this will take a look ^^

If someone can please help me I really would appericate it! All I want to do is add a Charmeleon still pic to an existing Gif animation. I'm trying to use the GIMP program but so far I cant get it the still Charmeleon pic to have a transparent background and then if that problem is resolved I dont know how to get the pic where its in front of the running flame animation. I just can't figure it out and if no one can help I'm quitting in trying to make it work.

I'm taking a Basic Drawing class for this semester despite not being in that field my Major. I always wanted to learn to draw properly. Now, I'm stepping forward to realize this goal.

All I want is to learn enough so when I want to, I can draw for fun. The extra motivation I am talking about is my posting my assignments I submit to my instructor after I get them back.

I want people I know, to see my progress as well as my instructor. So, from today on I am posting my work!

When I get the next assignments I have already done back from my instructor. I will post those as well!

Those who take the time to look an maybe even comment, thank you so much!

Merry Christmas everyone, I hope you all are having a great one. I myself am here in Houston with my family all dressed for the get-together and I'm even wearing a Santa hat lol. Everyone keeps saying I look cute with it on lol. I'm like "Cute! I'm not cute, I'm just stylish." lol. Heh, maybe I'll post a pic of me wearing it and see what y'all think lol.

Anyway, Merry Christmas and have a happy new year! I'm saying this in case I'm not on again in 2011 XD.

I had washed a large pot to cook my pasta dinner in tonight, and now I find my roommate and his friends using it to make a marijuana/butter concoction! Its been simmering for four hours, I just know even after its washed its gonna smell like pot. I knew he smoked pot and I really don't have anything against pot, but needless to say I didn't think my cookware was gonna be used to make some kind of marijuana elixir! Quite literally I have pot in my pot lol. Though I have nothing against marijuana I certainly wouldn't have approved of him using my pot to cook it!

They had told me earlier that they were making desserts for holiday gifts and when they took out my large pot I had nothing against it being used for that. However, they failed to tell me that all the desserts they are making are laced with marijuana that concoction in my pot being one of em. They told me earlier that I could have some of what they made, I would have been really mad had I eaten any of it and then find out it has marijuana in it, I personally don't want to use it.

Worst of all, the whole apartment smells like marijuana, all except my room thank god. It smells because at this very moment they have two trays of marijuana brownies in the oven, marijuana rice crispies in the fridge and that boiling tar in my pot. I swear I think I'll get stoned just from walking in the kitchen and smelling the intense fumes!

On top of that my dinner plans are ruined so now I haven't had dinner. I could go in an try an cook something else but I just cant stand the fumes to try and they have too much shit going on in there for me to put my making dinner into the mix.

Hello all. To those who decide to read this, I figured I should update about what is going to happen in the near future.

This Friday, I am moving into my new apartment! It is owned by the university and I will have a roommate sharing a 2 bedroom apartment. I don't mind this at all cause it saves me a lot of money versus leasing a 1 bedroom and I have more living space to boot. Besides, for not getting a dorm like I originally planed having a roommate who is also a student at the same school I am attending, it will still feel like the same college experience I would have had at a dorm but have more privacy when I want it. Plus, having a roommate to split the cost with also makes it either the same or a bit cheaper than what I would have paid for my dorm and that's if I got the cheapest one they had and I get to live in a 2 bedroom apartment which is better than if I got the most expensive dorm which is a lot more than this apartment lol. So all in all this is turning out a lot better than it would have if I had gotten my dorm.

Though, when I first was told that no one on the wait list was gonna get a dorm, my heart did jump to my throat lol. I thought I was fucked and had nowhere to live and no time to make arrangements and I also thought it would be so much more expensive that I wouldn't be able to afford it even with my financial aid. However all of that was proven wrong to my relief and now this Friday I will begin moving in and be finished no later than next Monday. I'll get to meet my roommate, explore the school more in depth and all things considered I am very excited!!

Well, everyday that passes brings me one day closer to the day when I move into my dorm and continue my college path anew at Texas State. No I am not changing what I am doing but it will be a new place, new experience, new beginning. I am excited about it, I look at it as an opportunity to meet new people, expand my knowledge further and overall a way of making changes to my life. 4 days till the end of the month and then 24 days after that, so 28 days, my new journey will begin. Let the countdown begin!