Don't be a stranger and say hello to  CalypsoLaforet if you've been wondering what happened to her. She's been going through school for her masters' degree and I'm pretty sure she could use a little cheering up, mostly to know that all of her friends are behind her. I certainly am. *Trollface*

I'm gonna be a bit but I plan on streaming. I'm just going to do some unconventional stuff such as try my hand at chibis once again, something I haven't done for a long time. This will happen in about an hour, assuming nothing bad happens and I've had a chance to eat.

I had actually tried to pay a few tabs and thought for sure I'd be fighting like hell to catch up, until I was given a very lucky break. This means that a couple of the loan places that my dear old man owes money to have made a deal which actually helps me in the long run. All I have to do now is see if I can front a deal of my own and see if it's possible to get a couple of these places payed off within two months. I'm keeping tabs on how I could do this, assuming there are no problems.

The down side is that I know my commissions have suffered greatly, since I was only able to finish one on time while I was wheeling and dealing in real life which put me behind another week. Fortunately, the remainder are sketches and I had planned to continue the several part commission after finishing them. Afterward, I'm gonna reorganize some price sheets, since I need to start getting things straight. My sketch detail levels have increased by like ten fold and my speed has suffered greatly because of it.

If, that is to say if, this deal goes through, I'm out of debt before November.

Also, two more days and my birthday hits, which has me a bit adamant about this week. Truth be told, I hate and resent my birthday. Nothing ever comes from it and my mood goes into the shitter every year because of it. Call it instinctive reflex. Twenty Five long years of getting shat on each and every year, things only started looking up when I got several friends who turned out to be a whole different class here on FA. It's surprising, in fact, amazing. I plan on cutting a day, my birth day in fact, to try and stream just some chibi art assuming I haven't forgotten how.

Bills are paid and I'm back to work. Hopefully I'll have something ready to submit by tonight.

With final bills coming in and all, getting my truck re-registered for another two years has been a breeze, but I've often worried about that whole bad return happening when something goes easily. Then of course I realize that I already went through hell before it all began, so it must've been a blessing in disguise.

Truck: I found the Transfer Case Control Module finally.. All wires were cut and I have police issue equipment doing it's job. Well, I WAS gonna take a rubber mallet to the TCCM but I had to take it to that item instead. Shifts much better. This was just after I took it to be inspected and had them look for the damn thing, then they discovered that the vehicle still has the wiring for the light bars and grill lights and everything. I'm tempted, sorely tempted to purchase items from Gall and OBM to put it back together.

I'd still need to do something about all the dents and decaying paint job.

I just found out the reason I can't access Picarto. I had received a message from developers finally. Apparently someone banned me and I don't even remember who, what, why or that I've ever been banned in the first place.

Edit: Still trying to find a solution. I'm still wondering why this is going on because it seems to be some bug that's the cause. I have been digging.

A brief summary of what my perspective was after the events of August is in order. Maybe it's just me (or at least so I thought) but when it comes down to friends who intentionally exclude you from interacting with other friends, they are definitely not your friends. It wasn't enough that I and my girl literally had to not only ask to join in on conversations unlike other people that we were I thought overlooked, but that suddenly out of nowhere a journal blasting both of us came out of nowhere left my head literally spinning in confusion about things that were "going on".

I don't know if anyone has even noticed, but if I have a problem with someone, I literally take it right to them. I also have a tendency to treat people how I feel I am being treated myself. This is what I did after that journal, but I wasn't satisfied with the responses I received. It came to the sum total that I asked if our requests to join in on conversation were just simply missed since me and misunderstandings happen from time to time. No one is perfect. The response I received however was along the lines of "Nope, I didn't miss it. I didn't want either of you there." When I asked why this was, the response I got was about bullshit that I thought was already resolved. A fucking Grudge.

This is basically how the Barb situation that happened a few years ago turned out too. A clique formed inside of a group and only those inside that clique got any "fair" treatment out of the whole deal. During games they were the only ones to ever get gear, during conversations, they excluded anyone who just "didn't belong" and even everyone involved who thought they were friends were literally treated like shit.

This is what caused me to react quickly and remove people from my Skype. I don't at all believe in staying where I feel absolutely unwelcome and quite frankly this treatment was extremely unfair. I've also been noticing some other behavior changes that cause me to acknowledge that I no longer want anything to do with this person. It only begins with the familiar phrase of "The pot calling the kettle 'black'."

Once again I found myself afterward trying to tell myself "okay, maybe it is all just some misunderstanding because I still respect this person as an old friend" and so on. Once again, trying to get involved has found me rather isolated after both my girl and I tried one more time to get involved and were met with a solid "No".

I'll say it again. I want nothing to do with this because I have better things to do with my time than waste it acting like some friendly bum begging for scraps. I refuse to have another Barb situation build up all over again because all this is doing is not only pissing me off, insulting, demeaning, but to drag it out all over people who know no better makes it that much more worse. It seriously turns one into the drama monger they claim to hate.

It boils down to this: What is seriously more important to you as a whole?

My answer is this: Me, myself and I. I prefer to feel welcome. I want nothing to do with that kind of person who intentionally drives a wedge between friends.  damnevildog had a very valid point: Friends should be easy. There shouldn't be any of this drama crap because all you should be interested in is hanging out and having fun.

I believe that to be true.

I'll just give the TLDR version.

Truck broke down, was a bitch to get started, had problems all over, blew more money than intended. I intend to finish this week (end next Saturday) with commissions which means I kind of want to listen to music and draw instead of messing with any games or anything. This doesn't mean I'm gonna ignore my friends. I can still do the skype calls and so on, but I am staying away from screwing around. From now on, I'm only taking commissions two at a time, instead of in excess number to make things go faster. I am going to need to build up finances to prepare for a coming disaster next month.

Still gonna finish gift art and other stuff on the side in between, but I am cracking down finally now that crap is stable.

Picarto.tv with a new stunt of course. Every time I log in, I have just enough time to say one or two messages before my name is removed from chat and my following messages aren't seen by anyone and is indicated by my name being blacked out. I've already tried Internet Exploder versus Firefox, tried clearing cache, tried clearing cookies, tried everything. I can't log into any room via Picarto, but I can still participate normally through Livestream and everything else.

I've also tried shutting down anti-virus software anti-malware software, updating java and everything else in between, tried shutting down ad-blocker and all of those were done all at once to attempt a quick fix. I've also reset my browsers to default settings, made allowances in the filters, but again, nothing is working via Picarto.

It sorta has that ban feel but no reason was ever given, no one has ever said anything cross to me and I've not said anything cross to anyone else that I'm aware of. I can also view the streams as normal which is also unusual.

My apartment complex is now under new management and the new lady lives next door to me. This is gonna be interesting.

Another bloody appointment soon then I can get back to focusing on my work. Considering how much I've had to juggle (not getting into it), I'll be glad when the last one for the month is over and done with (tomorrow in fact). I've got two commissions almost done, got a personal project I've been experimenting with (it actually helped me pick up tricks for these commissions) and I'm about ready to release a couple redux projects for the time being. I was slowed immensely because I'm a poor judge of time when it comes to working. What I think could be a five minute job turns into eight hours. When I post these things, I hope it'll be clear as to why it takes so long when I post them, I know everyone has been patient for a long time now.

In light of recent events I'm going to be separating myself from a couple former friends because they need to sort things out for themselves. This means I will not be attending the usual streams nor will I be participating in any events where they normally are, until the matter is resolved.

Let me throw a reminder. I've dealt with a very horrible person in my past who managed to ruin my life for ten years. I have never forgiven nor have I ever forgotten how it started and it'll be a cold day in hell before I ever let it get to me again. It's best that I keep a distance instead of trying to do as I always do, gain an understanding and try to mediate the situation. Rather than deal with it, I'm just walking away from it. Maybe somewhere down the road if they want to talk again I'd be more than happy to, but it's something they need to do for themselves. They're beyond my help.

Now if anyone needs me, I'll be doing my usual thing of trying to play catch up.

Gonna take three days to get back to what I was doing, already lost a lot of time trying to take a break to avoid going mad with how much line work I've seen.

The reworking of an old favorite cost me a lot of time, took longer than I anticipated. Let's face it, I know I have complicated characters and armor, and instead of reducing time, I eventually decided to sacrifice time for quality. Hopefully, this will work out.

I know my ADD causes a lot of time lost and it leaves a lot of people wondering if I'm going to be doing my really big set of posts. The answer is yes. I am going to start a slow transition, and a lot of artwork I had done last year will end up disappearing into the void of my scraps folder as I prepare to release the updates to them.

It was a lot of work guys, and still is. It's gonna be slow, but I finally have this crap and my commissions under control. I'm sorry everyone waited so long for this to happen. It's not really like me to keep a big length of massive quiet, but I'd like to hope that a lot of these updates were worth it. Keep an eye out, because changes are going to be made every day, starting with the few items that are close to completion.

Yeah, it's that time again. I guess I finally had enough of some dealings that have been going on. In my circle of people I call friends there has been a lot of falling out over the whole "He said she said" bullshit.

Basically, people getting angry over butt-hurt feelings. It's just that part that is getting to me. My friends getting angry over one another over the worst possible shit that amounts to just that: Bullshit. Quite literally, ladies and gentlemen, that's all this really is to me; Bullshit.

Yeah, I get there are things that some of you like that the other person doesn't like. I get that one person rants a lot about something other people love and it offends you. But fuck, it's garbage. It's rubbish. It amounts to nothing but disposable feces in my eyes. It's simply not worth fighting over.

Listen, and I say this to all of my friends who are getting offended at one another; Get some fucking balls/ovaries and grow the fuck up. You're not children. If you care about each other, start acting like it. Know that you can't change each others opinions over such trivial matters and it really should not fucking matter. Too many of you get offended over shit and then you get angry, and then you brood.

Even though it's pretty Star Wars-esque of me to point out, just maybe there's something to that whole "to the Dark Side it leads" thing.

Look, I love my friends, but I can do without the bullshit that's dividing each and every one of you. Stop it. Ask yourselves what's really important to all of you. Then ask yourself if the shit you're getting angry over really matters. It does not. There is nothing worth getting so angry over that you have to sit in a corner and brood over until you eventually want to turn around and back-stab your own friends. I've listened to all of you and your rants and while I can understand both sides, in all reality it has always come across as unimportance to me because of the basic question of how you really feel. If you really have such a problem, take it to the person you have a problem with and fucking talk to them. Maybe, just maybe you might resolve that problem. don't sit there and wait for one another to make that first step. That just makes shit worse because the mind does strange things when it seethes.

Again, I love you guys, but you need to step back and take a good hard look at yourselves. Lets just grab our gear and play some games again, talk again. You know, the stuff that used to be fun.

End rant.

Before I can breathe easily. Only a handful of appointments are lined up, all of them this week that I know of. The final one is on the 9'th but that requires fuel I don't have at the moment. We'll see how this works out, but I may be bouncing back to the mainstream of things.

Yay or nay on 3D art streams?

Yay or nay on music streams?

I'm hoping to for once be able to stream regularly and get commissions done for a change. This constant busy bullshit is for the birds, made only worse by the fact that I've had nothing but a long line of problems and drama creep up at every turn.

I just want to fucking draw, too much to ask of life?

I decided to while on down time, rip the transmission out from under the vehicle and mess with it a bit all day long. I replaced another old solenoid while cleaning the pan and getting it ready to be put back together. As is, for whatever reason the vehicle is still shifting kind of wonky which means it may just be a tad low on fluid still. I have just one more quart to put in and hopefully this actually fixes the problem for once. Other than this, if it turns out that it's continuing to have this problem, I'll need to check back over my old notes and see what I might've overlooked. Chances are this would identify the actual problem.

On a good note, however, the heavy electrical smell is gone. Now it's a matter of just soaking my feet and getting relaxed for tomorrow, when I start getting back into art drive. I've got a few appointments lined up for dumbass, but it's only three.

Edit: I really should stop overworking myself. I get that sick feeling and instead of resting like I probably should, I go that extra mile to ensure the job is complete. I need to break more frequently.

Truck's back in order.

To make sure my alternator is alive or dead, I need another vehicle to try and charge the battery. There don't seem to be any neighbors handy willing to lend their vehicles.

I have a hunch however that this is what is wrong aside from a burned out clutch. Wouldn't surprise me, two problems in one. We'll see, however, as soon as I can get some levity somewhere.

Clutch is out on the Tahoe. At this point it's a shame that all I need really is transportation until I get it fixed. At least it's pretty straight forward, unlike my land lords.

I was able to make a deal with my insurance company and bleh, they accepted $90 so I'm good for paying off next month after I was sniped this month. I don't know why I was sweating. Still, it means there is no immediate emergency now, however I can still take at least one more commission to keep things going. Thank you everyone, every little bit helps.

Added Notes: They had some things worded wrong on my little pamphlet that I should have looked at more closely as well. Most everyone I checked with around the building complex had notes that read insured up to 100k. When I brought this note to the office and handed it to them as well as my policy, all they had to say about the ordeal was "Woops".

'fraid I need to start taking more regardless of how I feel about this. I have 5 days to update my insurance which I'm slightly behind about $200 on. So, if anyone is looking for art and don't mind waiting a while, I'd like to be able to keep my apartment complex from being the vermin they are and trying to kick me out on top of a $100,000 fine.

Donations as always are welcome, but you guys know the drill, I'd prefer to get the work done so I don't feel like an ass. All of it will go to son_darin[at]hotmail.com via paypal.

Edit: Prices as follows, Sketch $10, Detailed Sketch $20 (Wings and tattoos add $5 each, $10 for both (Total $30)), Inks Unavailable but I can talk about them first, Color $40 (again add $5 wings and tattoos, $10 for both (Total $60)). More than one character, you can generally add $10 per additional character.

I can take sketches and talk about upgrades later.

So far so good. I haven't even replaced the final solenoid yet and it's showing signs that it has cleaned a lot of bad fluid out of it's system. The truck only slips once in a blue moon, so I'm waiting until after I've finished for the week before I take it apart Saturday to replace the last solenoid. Once the transmission has gone through it's third flush, it should return to business as usual.

So far it still can't shift when forced to drive like a grandma. This presents a problem picking up speed for any city driving as most people in city limits are proned to drive like assholes and fucktards. I still need to replace two more solenoids I've learned after watching an instructional video on transmissions put out by Weber State University. After studying these videos, I'm confident enough that I can rebuild a transmission, provided I acquire the parts.

So, off to the side I can offer transmission service, but don't expect any service warranties and you'd have to buy the parts. If I want, chances are I can just take the exams.

Humor aside, Truck's stuck still, capable of going places provided I have enough runaway. This means pissing people off at stoplights by staying put until retards clear the crossways.