It's difficult watching all the artists on my watch list opening commissions, especially the super cheap ones that I know I could sneak into my budget.

But no. Not this year. Well, perhaps near the end.

It's the con season again. I remember lamenting it last year. But you know what? If things go as well as I intend to have them, I'll be making AC next year, at least.

I know I'm going to miss Furfright, though. :(

Why does my body want to stay up until noon? I want sleeeep. Dammit.

*DIES*

My new avatar by  taoren is up! Not bad for my first, I must say. Yes, it had to have cliches in it. And yes, grrr. And the devouring of the 'u'. Rawring too!

I'm going down to visit my sweetie in VA this month, and guess what's going on? Symphony X concert. Not only do I get to spend time with my mate, but I also can catch possibly my absolute favorite band, at the least my favorite Symph/Prog metal act in concert. They're playing with Epica and Into Eternity, both excellent bands as well. There's something about a female lead/solo vocalist that makes me go nuts at a concert. Weird, but still awesome.

I'll have to find money for tickets, and likely will have to get my paws on a copy of Paradise Lost. If I'm going to try and out-sing the mighty Russel Allen in concert, I'll need to know the lyrics at least. Futile, I know. I might as well try to duel Michael Romeo (Or even Yngwie Malmsteen himself) with nothing but my air guitar.

ROCK ON!

P.S. For musical inspiration, see this: http://www.pandora.com/people/kieranwolf

...unless it's too metal and your brain asplodes.

INFECTION EJECTION CONFIRMED

RETURNING TO NORMAL DIET

...

...

Phew. Anyway, back to filling up my watchlist with h0t pr0nz and more angsty journals. Weird part is that there were several artists that I could swear I already put on my list, but somehow they weren't when I went and looked again. Can that happen?

Life without Fchan continues pretty normally. Other useful picboards helped add about fifty more artists here. Pretty soon, I won't even need to visit boards.

Oh, and did I mention? I'm moving in August, and lengthly preparations are underway. With that to keep me busy, and my lack of interest in writing still in full swing, it'll likely be Autumn before I have any submissions up again. Barring major inspiration and substantial sick time.

BLARGH!

I've discovered a horrible flaw in the universe. There's not enough hyena porn.

I REPEAT.

NOT.

ENOUGH.

HYENA.

PORNS!!

Tomorrow I shall set a date. And starting on that date, anyone who hasn't contributed some form of pornographic material with one or more hyenas in it will have to be punished.

Yes, that includes me. But I pick the punishment. It might be cookies. COOKIES OF DOOM.

That is all. *drops*

Zzzz...

What do you do with a pile of old, freezer-dried ground beef patties? Throw it away. What did I do?

Though there is precedent for making such former meat into Bad Chili ™, I decided to make gravy. Some butter, broth and a little flour, and some slow cooking of the abused beef will do wonders.

Add mashed potatoes and broccoli, and it's almost a real meal. Ever had a salisbury steak frozen dinner? This was slightly better. The gravy was a bit too mild with just one of those beef cubes, so I added a Ramen seasoning packet for extra flavor. Some steak sauce and half an ounce of vinegar finished it off.

We don't have a strainer, so I used one of those spatter shields you put over a pan when frying chicken. The resulting gravy was very nice, and did its job in making the meat edible. This was actually my first gravy ever, and I made it on a whim.

Soon, who knows? I might be cooking actual food all by myself. I have to go food shopping first, though.

I think watching like, 18 YouTube Poops in a row last night made me smarter. I'm having all these realizations. It's like doorways in my head I never knew were there are opening up now.

Or...maybe all the repetitive, crude hilarity of it all just busted some of my brain pathways open with cries of "Spaghetti," "Cum," and "Dinner Blaster."

Ok...everyone at a con? Good. Lol, it's safe.

Not much going on here, really. No, not much writing. I'm going to have to take steps, such as grabbing some PCish hardware that works, and building an MP3 collection.

Sadly, my attempts at getting my paws on a cheap, working laptop have been in vain so far. I'm nearly there, but looks like I'll be settling for a laptop hooked up to a desktop monitor at best.

Setbacks, setbacks.

And no, no more cons for me. Can't do the social thing, so I'll be hanging out on my mountain top (making stuff explode and watching anime) if anyone needs me.

Peace out, my nin-ken peeps.

Furfright is just a few days away. What are you dressing up as? I'm going as a Murr. No one would ever think of that!

How did I get so many pageviews? It's like, over a hundred!
Something inside me says that I should post pornography in order to get even more, but...meh.

Even so, the chances of me doing more writing rise a miniscule amount each day. I may even submit for Furfright's conbook, since I have no less than four concepts that would fit into it.

Essentially, things in general have been getting better the same way. It's just such a slow process that I can easily assume that things will never show significant improvement. Someday, however, I may just end up well-off.

Bad me. I should have known something would come up that would prevent me from attending AC. Going was sort of an impulse thing anyhow, which then turned into me trying to get there to finally meet someone important to me.

I'm still going to Furfright assuming my financial situation stabilizes.

I hope AC's a good time for folks. Anyone reading this should totally check out FANG at the Furnation table, since, y'know, I'm totally in it. That is, I wrote dragonporn for the fantasy issue.

If you can't cheer for me missing AC, then you can at least cheer for dragonporn.

Ok, here's how it will be from now on. In any place where comments can be posted, if your avatar happens to be a ninja, you automatically win all arguments. Sound fair? Fuck fair!

ERRATA: In arguments that involve multiple ninja avatars, the one who is also a Shikoku Inu of the Koga clan both wins and is awarded SEVENTY-FIVE internets per line.

I've now heard more than five furs use the term 'rape' in such a way as to express their own desire to have it happen to them.

I'm actually hoping this is a furry thing, not something that's prevalent in the gay community (all were homosexual males).

Just FYI, the definition of 'rape' is extremely concise and clear: http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/rape

No, rape isn't 'surprise sex' or 'rough sex'. It isn't even sex at all. No one who has been raped will ever be able to accept the word being used in this manner. No one who's been raped is going to appreciate you using the term while winking conspiratorially to your nancy friends.

Am I being uptight? Perhaps. Perhaps also, people should be considerate enough to realize that rape is a crime. The word shouldn't be thrown around as it if were something it isn't.

To me, expressing that you 'want to be raped' not only constitutes a contradiction in terms, it's one of the few things that I could ever consider personally offensive. To me, it's just as bad as going to a gay bar and using the phrase "I want to give you AIDS" as a pickup line. Similarly offensive, similarly inconsiderate and unnacceptable.

Not afraid of AIDS or rape? Well then, you're fucking stupid. No one deserves either. No one deserves to be taught first-hand just how bad they both are. One is almost always a death sentence, while the other just makes you wish it was.

For the record, I've never been raped or contracted AIDS, but I know people who have. Most people do, despite what I've been led to believe around here.

Everyone has the ability to use language to express what they mean without using 'rape' in this way. Urban Dictionary probably has over 100 terms that are appropriate in place of it that aren't defined as violent crimes.

To anyone who habitually uses the word 'rape' in this manner, please stop. What possible reason do you have that could justify that?

And why, you ask, would I still be up when I have to be awake for work in four hours?

Volle arrived today. I read it in one sitting, and liked it. I would have done the same even if I didn't like it, really.

As enjoyable a read as it was, I was persuaded into thinking for a while that I can enjoy things like political intrigue and espionage. There are pages and pages of things that go on in the day-to-day life of a spy stationed in a position of high standing within a palace. There are also numerous sex scenes.

I think the worst thing about the book was how my connection to the supporting characters (especially sexual and/or love interests of the main character) lessened over time. I still liked Helfer and Tish at the end, but for some reason I stopped liking Richy as much, as well as Arrin. Xiller's reputation, however, was still completely untarnished by the end. As for Volle...I like him, but I don't identify with him on a purely personal level. That is to say, I don't have much in common with him or his personality, but he's a very likable character.

As for the smut, well, it's good at times, but the author was accurate at attaining his goal of making the steamy parts only a partial distraction from the storyline. I should really learn that, myself, though I may always favor making my erotic scenes as enticing and...inspiring as I can. I just dislike the idea of the erotic being the main focus in anything I write, is all. As for Volle, there is definitely an intriguing storyline to follow.

I'll be trying to fit the next book, Pendant of Fortune, soon. I also want to get my hands on The Prisoner's Release. I'm also expecting the first FANG volume to arrive soon. A friend has the copies of the first two volumes I originally got, and I'm thinking the new pocket versions will make great gifts for another person I'm close to. Right after I read them through at least one more time, that is. Does that count as regifting? Ah well...not like I could stop myself when I have an actual book filled with furry stories right there in front of me.

Yeah, it's official. I'm writing now. Well, again. One submission for FANG 5 almost done. I also worked on one or two other projects.

Music helps. So does a clean work area and food. It's still too cold for me to escape to a less...city-like locale to write in, but at least I feel like I might finish some stories that have been in the works for months and months soon.

Also, I'm back on dialup. Owwie.

Furry smutbooks will rot my brain...in the good way.

http://www.baddogbooks.com is back online! Pocket editions of FANG Volumes 1 and 2 are now available for their original price of $19.99!

Furnation will soon be carrying these, which is a very good thing for me, being a contributing writer and all. I can at least vouch for the complete awesomeness of both volumes, though I got the humongous copies that were available originally. These ones won't be good paperweights, but that's why there's words for readin' printed on the inside pages.

Also, I have evidence that Volume 3 is going to be available soon. That would be the gay fantasy erotica issue that DL got accepted for like...a year ago? Only time will tell what sort of waves this will generate for my own popularity. Probably not many, but at least I can whip out a copy as proof when I tell someone I've been published. XD

Volume 4, the Sci Fi issue, is probably going to be available willy nilly after 3, so if you don't want teh smut or teh horrorz, you'd best take a look.

As for Volume 5...the deadline seems to be April 14. Wow...maybe I'll actually have the time to become semi-satisfied with what I send in. XP

Oh, and I also bagged myself a copy of Volle, since I had to at some point. Stupid Kyell and his tantalizing foxes and wolves et al.

Yeah, I'm facing down some serious lack of writing motivation. It's not writer's block, I've realized, it's just that I dont' want to work on my projects or even any of the ideas I've already written down.

I want to work on something new.

In that vein, I'd like to put forth an offer of trade.

I'll write you a story in trade for something. It could be another story (even as a mutual challenge), or even a piece or artwork, like a con badge. Anything, really. It doesn't have to be worth a lot, even.

I realize that this is an idea that probably won't fly with a lot of people, but I'm pretty sure I need the practice and the extra incentive to write something nice.

So email me or something with your idea and anything else you can provide. Essentially, anything you want written. I'll do horror, sci-fi, romance, fantasy...or anything you can come up with. I need a challenge.

I decided to change my avatar after making some new ones for my new LJ account. If you don't recognize it, he's Tesshin from Ginga Densetsu Weed, a Koga nin-ken dog (no, not a hyena, as much as he looks like it). He freaking rules

Anyway, my new blog is going to be devoted to my narrative projects, since I'm hesitant about posting unfinished work here or on Yiffstar.com or Furrag.com.

karai_crocuta.livejournal.com

I'll be putting up WIPs there, which is all I have to offer right now, really. I'm choosing LJ because it's convenient and familiar to me, and LJ cuts are cool.

So anyway, if you're interested, go there and friend me! If you happen to have read my stuff already and want to see more, don't hesitate to comment, either. I'm prone to inactivity, and sometimes a kind word is all I need to devote more time to writing.

This is what I get for going to FC. I may have caught it from my roommates or some random person...

Anyway, it's the weekend and I can fight it with chickensoups and vitamins. I'm producing mucous by the pint in the meantime, though no green (meaning it isn't a serious infection yet).

Of course, the weather on Friday made it worse. WTF is up with a -20 degree wind chill in Massachusetts? O_o

Anyone else have unwanted passengers in their bloodstream on the way back from the con?

Sweet. I just got an email confirming that my story, "Hyperstream" has been selected for FANG volume 4!

For those not in the know, FANG, The Little Black Book of furry fiction, is a new venture, though it's already got four issues in the works. Essentially, it's a narrative anthology, each issue with a different theme.

Volume 4's theme is 'Clean sci-fi', and "Hyperstream" is definitely that.

Head to http://www.baddogbooks.com to learn more.

The fourth issue will be available as soon as it's done, but you can also go there and purchase issues 1 and 2, both with lots of gay sexxorz inside!

Issue 3 ('Gay Fantasy'), which my story "Dragon's Love" will be in, is still in production with the original editor, Alex "Osfer" Vance.

The new editor, Ben Goodridge, seems just as exacting about submissions and hardworking to boot. That means that, without a doubt, FANG 4 is going to rock. For the record, Volumes 1 & 2 changed my whole outlook on furry fiction. They were that good.

So go learn more, before it's too late!

You've been warned. XD XD

I've been reading lots of journal entries relating to the recent TOS issues. On the whole, I'm quite glad to see that most (actually, I think all) of my watch list is staying around.

Folks should remember that artwork that already could be construed as cub sex was already allowed on the site. The only criterion was sexual maturity, originally.

Now, assuming the filters are successful, that artwork will be hidden from those that don't go through the process along with the artwork that would have been deleted prior to this decision.

That's not all, though. Now, anything that enough people consider offensive will find itself under a filter.

How is this not an improvement?

The only thing that people can take up issue with now, in my opinion, is the very fact that this artwork will still be allowed here. And to those that found the previously-allowed 'cub' artwork to be offensive, well...this decision is no change at all, except that now that art is going to become invisible.

See? I just used reason to disprove everyone! If only it mattered. XD

I know people will still act with their supposed beliefs in mind, or perhaps just behave unreasonably (an old standby). So...I guess it's good that those people identify themselves, because I'm not sure if I would want to risk dealing with them.

Hooray for the admins and their conduct on this issue, especially Dragoneer!

And to everyone that's staying, you have my thanks.

Perhaps I should have been paying more attention on the boards or any at all, but this cub thing is pretty wack.

Dragoneer rocks pretty hard for being patient about this and giving us a vote. I mean, the TOS clearly stated that cub art was not allowed, yet he's willing to give it a chance.

Of course, that's the mark of a good manager. Making the decision that makes the most people happy is important.

Personally, I love cubs. Most of my story ideas involve them in some capacity, sexually or not. I like artwork by artists like BA and Wolfblade, too. I want that kind of material to have a place here, but I realize that if it makes people this upset, then it has to go.

That's the bottom line, folks. If cub art is banned, I'm still going to be here. And I doubt that anyone's actually on here just for that stuff.

It's better just to end the whining and ranting now.

I've had this account for a while, so I suppose I should put something here.

Name's Kieran. Folks call me KieranWolf and Karai Crocuta, too, but Kieran's usually what I go by. I'm mostly a writer, though I don't really put out much material, usually.

My main gift is imagination. I think of ideas and develop them with no trouble at all. I hardly even need any external inspiration anymore. I just think for a second and bam, story idea. Give me a few more seconds and I'll flesh it out. Give me a day or two and I have enough plot to go with it.

I also consider myself gifted in the area of writing, though that's mostly just an obsession with having readable prose. I used to be totally uptight about my style, but I'm getting looser now, if not just because I might otherwise not write at all if I didn't allow myself to be imperfect.

So that's what I'll be contributing. Stories, and maybe some other stuff at some point. Until then I'm mostly going to be oogling p0r-eh, erotic artwork. And lurking. And sometimes commenting if the mood strikes me.

See? I'm already letting myself go. I just started two sentences with 'and'. Anyway...here I am.