So, I almost didn't go to FCN this year, but I managed to make it through the cunning use of IOUs. Roomed with  craftyandy  darkwolf33333 and  semimajor, suited as Money on Sunday, volunteered in Artist Alley, had booze, danced like a crazy person and, most importantly, had lots of fun. Will definitely make it next year.

I was kind of sad when I left because there's a bit of a gap between FCN and my next con. Won't be making it to AC because my one and only sister is getting married that same weekend, so my next con will most likely be Furlaxation in September. Am toying with going to Camp Feral over Labor Day weekend, but that's a definite maybe. In a way, it's kind of nice to put con-going on the back burner for a little bit; real life has started to complain about me neglecting it.

If you got any pictures/video of me in or out of suit, link me to them!

I've been single for close to six months now. Honestly, it's not that terrible. I can make my own decisions and focus more on taking care of myself, keeping my affairs in order and hanging out with my friends.

That being said, I'm not interested in looking for a mate, nor am I interested in being "set up".

My breakup with my ex was painful, painful enough to put me on antidepressants after some scary near-suicidal thoughts landed me in the hospital. I still have a hard time telling people about it; whenever people ask me why I moved from MI to OH and back, I tell them that I had a job down there and got laid off. It's plausible enough, so they don't bother asking an more questions.

Yeah, I know I'm deflecting people when I do that. It's an old habit I developed as I was growing up to protect myself. Growing up in a small town and attending a small school where gossip's as good as gospel, I had to act mundane to avoid the teasing and the whispering (I still get paranoid about that). At the same time, I wanted people to like me, to want to hang out with me and do interesting things together. I especially wanted boys to notice me as a girl, not as someone to get homework answers from.

Looking back, my first few crushes were the result of me getting attention from a somewhat popular boy and me enjoying the rush. I admit it, I'm an attention junkie, and like any other junkie I did some crazy things to get my fix, things that were borderline stalkerish. The inevitable rejections I got didn't help matters either. Needless to say, I was (and still am) messed up.

I am surviving though, and part of my surviving stems from taking control of my life, especially parts where I once felt powerless. If I decide to start dating again, I want it to be on my terms with who I am interested in. I don't mind suggestions from my friends, but I would rather take the initiative on meeting someone than be thrust on a blind date with a friend's cousin's coworker who may be multiple levels of wrong for me.

In short, consider this kitty single and closed for any dates until further notice. Thanks.

This past weekend was a blast, plain and simple. PCD hasn't hit yet, but then again I'm going by the old maxim "Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened". That being said, on with the recap!

Friday: Left with  platero shortly after 5 am MI time and made it to Chicago around 8 am Chicago time. Went to wait in line for registration and were rewarded with spots near the front of the line. I met up with  emeraldtigerknight after getting my badge and together we went to get our room. Said room turned out to be occupied, so we went back to the front desk and were told to wait for a room to open up. I suited up as Money in the meantime, and after a brief panic over some missing luggage finally made it to my room. After opening ceremonies and some running around in suit, I went back to the room for some rest (I'd only gotten 45 minutes of sleep the night before). The rest of the evening consisted of noms in the con suite,  lil_chi_wolf's birthday party, hitting up the dance, and booze.

Saturday: The hotel gave us free breakfast for yesterday's room snafu, so all four of us enjoyed the breakfast buffet. Went to the Last Fur One dance workshop and the performing in fursuit panel, then checked out Artist's Alley and part of the Dealer's Den before watching the Fursuit Parade. Went back to the Dealer's Den and checked out the Art Show as well. Got invited to eat at Gino's downtown by  darkwolf33333 and  craftyandy, so I went along. Met up with more of my friends back at the hotel for sushi (I ate pretty well that day) and decked myself out for that night's dance with some glow-in-the-dark body paint. More booze was consumed, and more fun was had.

Sunday: Definitely more low-key. Picked up a badge I'd commissioned and watched part of the Fursuit Dance Competition before getting Money from Platero. Suited up and participated in the Fursuit Games, went to closing ceremonies, made a liquor run with Andy and Nashoba, saw someone walking their pet kangaroo, went to a huge room party, and had yet more booze.

Monday: Checked out, had lunch, then went back home with  nukanuki tagging along. Loaded my videos and photos onto my computer, then went to bed happy.

Now I must be off to work, away from fursuits and raves and Andy's ever-present camera. At least Thanksgiving is this week, and I already know that I am thankful for my friends both old and new who helped make MFF 2011, my first ever furry con, an experience I will never forget.

Where are you staying?:
At ye olde Hyatt Regency

What day are you getting there?:
Crack of dawn on Friday morning

How long are you going?:
Friday-Monday morning

Who will you be with?:
Rooming with  bluedragon407,  emeraldtigerknight and  foxlover_H (I'm the token female); hanging out with  cinderelmcreek  platero  tyzin  lil_chi_wolf and lots of others.

What is your gender?:
La chica

How old are you?:
24

How tall are you?:
5'7"

What suits will you have?:
Whichever suits people will let me wear. (Currently Money and Chi.)

Can I touch you?:
Sure, just don't set off my creeper alarm.

Can I talk to you?:
Absolutely!

Can I take pictures with you?
Yep, just remember to tag and share them with me.

Are you nice?:
Of course!

Are you cliquey?:
I try not to be.

Can I stalk you?:
See answer for "Can I touch you?"

Can I buy you lots of drinks?:
Sure thing! Be sure to ask me what's all in an Eskimo Pie.

Can I hug or snuggle you?:
Hugs- Yes. I am a very huggy person.
Snuggles- Reserved for those I know really well. Sorry.

Do you do trades?:
If you like poorly drawn stick figures, then yes.

Do you have an artist table?:
Nope, but I know others who will.

Do you like parties?:
PARTY! Party party party party party party party party party party...

What should I not do around you?:
Just don't be a creep or an ass hole. Also, do not go through my stuff without asking me! Please, shower then hug!

If I see you, how should I get your attention?:
Saying "Kira!", "Hey you over there", or "Oh look, something shiny!" will usually do it. Especially the shiny one.

So I've got a job working at Steelcase, which means not only will I be able to pay my rent and not have to mooch off of my mother for everything, but I will be able to go to MFF, my first furry con ever! *gasp*

Not only that, but I will have a fursuit! *double gasp*

And I'll have my own hand-drawn badge to go with it! *triple gasp, passes out from lack of oxygen*

Oh, November cannot come soon enough...

So it's been a couple weeks since, well, "the incident". I'm getting my life on track for the most part; I've got an interview with a temp agency tomorrow to get a source of income, and I'm looking for a place of my own since my brother and my sister-in-law want to fix up the farm a bit before the wedding. I'm also doing workouts with my mom and her friend, and I'm seeing a counselor once a week. The antidepressants are helping a little, but it could be a couple more weeks before they kick in fully.

I haven't really talked to him since I left; I figured we both needed some time apart before we could try to rebuild at least a bit of a friendship. His stepmom, on the other hand, likes to bash me whenever the opportunity presents itself. Case in point: he commented that he lost some weight in the past couple of weeks. She comments that it's because I'm not around to buy him junk food and that HER cooking is helping him lose weight. Ummm, excuse me? He's gone shopping with me, he had input on our grocery list, HE COULD HAVE MADE ACTUAL DECISIONS ABOUT THINGS. Ugh, whatever. If she still wants to act like a middle-schooler when she's middle-aged, that's her own fault. I'm not going to bother with her.

That's pretty much it for now. Moving out and being a bridesmaid will keep me busy for a while, and I'm debating whether or not to go to Camp Feral. We shall see.

Oh yeah, thank you  cinderelmcreek and  sporbitz for letting me hang out. I really appreciated it.

"This has taken a lot of thought, but I think it is time we moved on.
My life has too much stress in it already between the Zone and BK, and adding more to it is just going to make things worse. There have been times at work where I have felt like I'm going to have a heart attack from all the stress.
You say you want to come back in August. Problem is that Stepmom has flat out said you are not welcome back in the house because when you come back, what's going to happen? We repeat the nonsense from January, and thusly you don't get a job till Christmas? I think not.
I do hope you find what you're looking for in life, but I'm blocking your path apparently and I think this is for the best."

-from my now ex-fiance, sent via Facebook message

I... I don't know what to do now. I'd at least hoped for one last sitdown session before deciding to either go our separate ways or try again, but now I don't think he's willing to do that.

It may be a long time before I'm back to normal. A really, really, really long time...

I'm back in MI.

You know how I was planning a trip to NYC? Yeah, not happening.

You know how I was living with my fiance and working at CP? Yeah, neither of those is true now.

Got into an argument over said trip and he said if I went, I'd better take all my stuff with me.

I'd mentioned the trip before and he'd asked if I'd be able to afford it, but he didn't say I shouldn't go outright, which made the amount of yelling he did all the more shocking to me.

I called my mom while I bawled my eyes out and she suggested that I come back to MI and that the two of us take a break for a while. I agreed and told my fiance that I was leaving. His stepmother (who was among the eight people that rented a house with us) insisted that I leave that night. So I packed up my stuff, still crying as I did, and got a hotel room for the night.

This morning I called CP to see if I could take an extended leave of absence. Unfortunately they wouldn't give me more than a few days leave, so I quit, turned in all of my stuff, then drove back to MI.

I honestly don't know what's going to happen now. I'm out $260 for plane tickets I'm not going to use, and I might have fucked up the only relationship I've ever had beyond repair. I still consider us engaged, but Facebook says "it's complicated".

Sorry to any MI furs I know (especially  acfay1 since I skipped out on him), I'm not feeling very social at the moment, so you probably won't see me for a little while. I'm not putting any of this on FB either; it was enough of a shitstorm when he posted it on FB, and his stepmother's comments only made things worse.

I can only hope things can get better. I can't take any more fuck-ups like this...

... and by evil, I mean a trip to NYC.

See, I want to audition for Who Wants to Be a Millionaire (my brother did it a few years ago, so I have to uphold family tradition, even if it's not a real "tradition"). I'd originally planned to be there the same weekend as the Tony awards, but sadly the funds will not be available in time. Oh well, I'll live.

The plan is to fly out early Sunday morning, gallivant around a bit before seeing a show (most likely The Normal Heart because OMG Jim Parsons yay!), check into hotel, dinner at Sardi's (why? Because I can) then another show before sleeping. Monday will also consist of some gallivanting and checking out the Sony Wonder Technology Lab before the audition at 5. Tuesday will be some last-minute touring before returning home Tuesday night.

Most of this hinges on being able to get three days off in a row. Late June is a kinda-busy-but-not-as-bad-as-July time at CP, but since I can line up two different days off (the work week runs Mon-Sun, and I only get one day off a week unless contracted otherwise) it shouldn't be too much of a problem, provided I give enough notice. Money's not too big of an issue since I've been getting decent hours, but that can still be an influence.

My only regret is not being able to be there for more than three days. Maybe I'll go back this fall...

So I'm back at CP. Again.

Honestly, I didn't really want to go back, but I didn't have much of a choice. It's a source of income, and that means the fiance can stop covering my part of the rent. Also, I'm back at my favorite restaurant and I'm going to be at the cash register, where my dealings with tourists will hopefully be minimal.

Unfortunately, unless I find another, better paying job, I'm pretty limited in what I can do and where I can go this summer. I contracted my brother's wedding off, so that shouldn't be a problem, but other than that I won't really be able to do much until after Labor Day. I'm going to keep my eye out, but in the meantime I'll have to deal with people who walk in to the restaurant and ask me where the Magnum Force* is. (Or worse, ask if the restaurant is a buffet. IT'S WRITTEN IN INCH-HIGH LETTERS ON THE WINDOWS, HOW DO YOU MISS SOMETHING LIKE THAT??!)

























*There was a coaster called Magnum Force located at Flamingo Land Park in England, but it was sold to La Feria Chapultepec Magico in Mexico City. It now goes by the name Montaña Infinitum. ~The More You Know~

Hope everybody has a good Easter and a successful Half-Priced Chocolate Day. The fiance and I will be sharing some delicious ham tonight, and tomorrow we'll go search for some cheap candy (Cadbury Eggs for him, Reese Peanut Butter Eggs for me, and Starburst Jellybeans for the both of us.)

Fans of Doctor Who may already know this, but Elisabeth Sladen passed away on April 19th, 2011 from cancer at the age of 63. She was best known for playing Sarah Jane Smith, one of the most popular companions to travel with the Doctor, from 1973-76 and in numerous episodes thereafter. She also had a spinoff children's show called "The Sarah Jane Adventures", which was in the middle of filming its fifth season at the time of her passing.

I drew this as a tribute: http://www.furaffinity.net/view/5615451

"The universe has to move forward. Pain and loss, they define us as much as happiness or love. Whether it's a world, or a relationship...everything has its time. And everything ends." -- Sarah Jane Smith, "School Reunion", Doctor Who

RIP, our Sarah Jane. You will be missed.
1948-2011

I swear, money must be allergic to me or something.

I got my tax refund a couple weeks ago. It was a fair amount, a little over $1300. I told myself that this time I would try not to go uber-crazy on the spending. Sadly, this was not to be.

First, my car needed new brakes and rotors. Then my housemate (I live in a house with my fiance and 7 other people) asks to borrow some money to get his car going. Then I got the fiance a new PSP and the new Nintendo 3DS (to be fair, he's currently paying my part of the rent). I'm now left with just under $300 in my account. Now, I'd consider this fine and dandy, but we were told that the utility bills are past due, with at least one cut-off notice already. So it looks like that money will be gone soon.

Between that and my issues with my Paypal account, it'll be a while before I actually commission people. I'd try taking some writing commissions myself, but I honestly don't know where to begin, plus written commissions don't seem to be as popular as art commissions, especially with someone who isn't very established.

In the meantime, I've got air in my lungs, food in the fridge, a roof over my head and gas in the car. I can survive another day.

For the past month or so, I've been trolling for free art (my profile looked kinda bare with just a ref in the gallery). Thankfully I found a few artists who not only had interesting styles, but were willing to humor me by drawing and uploading free art of Kira. I made a promise that when I had some money, I would commission those artists.

Well, thanks to the government, I can do just that. With the exception of the first and last artists (didn't get free art from the former, waiting on free art from the latter), I received free art from everyone on this list:

 darkicewolf Precious Pups drawing (paid)
 djsammehfox Icon
 capt-topknot Color in sketch
 dodgevulpe Undecided
 deereshorttail Undecided
 omni-aura Comic
 vanillin Undecided
 kurourufu Digital con badge

Check them out; you might like them too.

First, get free art here from  kurourufu
http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/2208698/

http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/2226927/

http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/2230473/

Second, I shall not be at FCN, but I hope everyone who is going has fun and travels safely.

Third, I have my tax refund. Money is good. I can finally get some commissions done.


That's all for now.

Go here for more info: http://www.furaffinity.net/view/5514712

Don't forget to mention that I referred you.

Go here for more info: http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/2211880/

Going until Friday at 10pm.

You know you want in...

I like traveling. Even when the route is a familiar one, anything can happen.

Between now and the end of the year, my sojourns will include:

Bridal Shower for my future Sister-in-Law in May
Cousin's Wedding in June
Brother's Wedding in July
Cousin's AND Aunt's Wedding in September (on the same weekend, one on Sat. and one Sun. afternoon)
Artprize in September (this one's a maybe; I do want to help  cinderelmcreek pick out his track jacket :p)

And that's just me going from OH to MI. The fiance wants to visit some friends and family in upper NY, and I'm planning on tying that in with a trip to New York Comic Con in October. We should be able to swing that; my new job pays pretty well but we'll have to see. Doesn't stop me from plotting and planning things in advance though. >:)

Here's hoping my car can hold out that long...

Y'know, free art is always nice.

That's why you should go here before 12 pm Central today. http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/2171930/

Just sayin.

Not too long ago I took the online Jeopardy! test. I have no idea how well I did, all I know is that they haven't called me in for the written test and mock Jeopardy! round. (I also watched the Watson matches and hope that it doesn't lead to the robots taking over the world, benevolent though Watson may seem.) I'm honestly surprised I didn't try to do it sooner, given my Quiz Bowl experience and propensity to yell out the answers when I watch the show (and use words like 'propensity').

Which leads us to my aforementioned cracked-out dream: I was on the set for Jeopardy! after my second match (I vaguely remember Johnny Gilbert, the announcer, mentioning my '1-Day Cash Winnings total') and it was dark. I go over to my podium and my answer from Final Jeopardy was still there. The question had to do with naming a certain fish from the Bible (not the whale from Jonah, so your guess is as good as mine) and I had gotten it right, not to mention writing additional gibberish on my answer (I'm pretty sure Lady Gaga got referenced). What baffled me was that despite my opponents dropping down to $0 and me having over $19,000 from that show... I still lost. Wacky? Yes. Don't know if it means anything, but we'll see.

All else is fairly well here. I'm technically employed right now as a railroad crew driver but I haven't been called in for a job yet. In the meantime I continue to fill out applications wherever and whenever possible.

It'll be good to have money again, considering I have bills to pay and a wedding that I'm supposed to be planning (we STILL don't have anything booked yet, but I'm not shooting for anything sooner than April of 2012). I kind of feel bad for my mom though; my brother is getting married in July and my sister is getting married next June, which means all three of us are engaged at the same time. Yeah...

Well, until next time... enjoy the weather, or loathe it terribly if it snows or rains a lot.

Well, 2011 is going well enough for me. Have moved from the Mitten to slightly below the Mitten. While this means I get to see my fiance on a regular basis, it also leaves me jobless. Again. Stupid money, so damn necessary for society and stuff...

Am gearing up for two D & D campaigns, one online and one IRL. I'm playing a changeling wizard in the former and a human rogue in the latter. Makes me miss  sporbitz's campaign with  cinderelmcreek,  platero and  nicthalon a bit (heh heh, A Dragonborn Falls On You), but maybe once I find a decent virtual tabletop online we can get together like old times.

Lately I've been feeling a bit of a shift when it comes to my primary fursona. I never really connected much with Kira as a whole because a) I made her like I would make a D & D character, and b) she mostly embodied my anger and frustration which, while therapeutic, doesn't happen much anymore. I won't retire her completely, since I think she'd make a good character in a story I want to write, but she doesn't fully represent me.

Which brings me to Lynnie. Lynnie is, essentially, me as a feral house cat. The (non-furry) fiance and I both like cats, grew up with cats, and consequently act like cats because we are weird like that (it's common for us to meow and go 'nomnomnom' to each other). Because I feel a bit more "domesticated" (in a good way) Lynnie's been more at the forefront than Kira lately. Once I figure out what she looks like and have the money to do so I'll get a commission done.

Basically, I now have two fursonas. I'll still go by Kira, because I like the name and others know me by that name, but I'll act more like Lynnie. Confusing? Yeah, but that's ok. I'll figure it out eventually.


tl;dr- I moved, I still roll d20's, you can still call me Kira but I'm less likely to set you on fire now. :-D

Greetings, all. *waves*

I know a good chunk of you already know me IRL, but in case you don't, hello.

I'm Kira Jigoku Tora, though I go by Kira to most furries. Golden tabby tiger (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:G.....uffalo_Zoo.jpg in case you're not familiar with them) with a dash of phoenix to make things interesting.

Umm...yeah. That's it for now, I guess.