Well i though i would update those who might care and wonder what has been going on since my last journal.

Last Friday i saw my Dr and well it was mixed in my mind. I got 3 things out of it.

1: he would prescribe me something to maybe help with the panic attacks when they occur.
2: At some point i would get a call about a Psychiatrist
3: Sometime further out i will get an endoscope of my throat and stomach but because of the panic and gag reflex i would be put under general anesthesia.


Well for the meds it took longer because from Friday till Monday when i called my Dr again, whatever he prescribed was on back order and no time frame so he changed it to a 30 pill 0.5 mg dose of generic brand Zanax, to take as needed

I will have a Tella-heath call October 5th with a Psychiatrist so that is still in the worlds. As for the last thing because of how busy things are no time-frame on the endo-scope.


Aside from hat i been having off days where my stomach feels uneasy though to me my anxiety feels ok but its probably now, other days its my anxiety and i can tell cause i hear my heart beat easier and am more aware of stuff my body does.


My eating has not been great cause when you feel anxious and stomach feels out of whack i worry about not keeping things down, but i have eaten a bit better lately, just bored of chicken, rice, and other bland stuff. I been having Chamomile tea and am trying adding some powdered ginger but i am just not used to it as much..

I guess if anything no dry heaves in a few days from anxiety, its just been a rough week.

Thank you all who have replied and gave me such positive thoughts

I normally try to leave my RL stuff to those who know me well but for this i felt i needed to let other know because of how it affects me.


On Friday we have a severe storm come through and knock out power from about 2pm till 7pm and during that time the house got hot and humid and so my mom and i went out and i got Burger King. Now i had eaten what i got which was 2 burgers and some fries, a very simple meal, but about 10 min after i ended up throwing up which in turn brought to the front something i been dealing with all my life, I had panic attacks, which in turn aggravated my sensitive gag reflex and i had more dry heaves and so on, It is now Tuesday night and I've had panic attacks and dry heave bought with some vomiting each night. I am to the point where i am no longer scared of the dry heaves and such i am just frustrated. I see my Dr on Friday but I've been doing my best to deal with my heightened anxiety and try to focus on calming down. It is tough and sometimes upsetting yes. I just need to beat this.



I decided to share this because i know i am not alone in some of these feelings and also to let others know this is what i deal with daily from the high anxiety to a sensitive gag reflex.


I just hope by sharing this other people who might have similar feelings know that it will pass and there are people who will help you.

I want to get a new Solo pic done but well i am not sure what it should look like so if anyone has something they might like to see let me know i really want some ideas lol

Well with 2 days before my b-day i have so much i want to get done but other things just been taking its place, so i just need to relax more and hope things will get more calm for me soon.

Hope soon i can get my thoughts together to get some pic idea together for someone to draw and also for money issue to resolve themselves as well.

Anyway sorry bout this mini-vent but it helps

Decided to re-post this with more info on what i am looking for;

I am trying to find a decent MP3 player to replace my iPod touch since its nearing the end of its lifespan. Since apple will not make any more i need something different. Here is what i would kike it to have:

-32 gigs
-spottily able to be on it
-compatible with iTunes so i can transfer the songs i have bought over to the new player
-USB connectivity to charge and easier transfer


I am NOT looking to get a phone since i already have a phone and its pointless to but a phone just to use it to play music mostly at night when trying to sleep.


Aside from that just need something not too expensive or too cheap just one that will fit my needs.

This probably a long shot but i am hoping to find a anime female from some anime\ecchi\hentai that i do not know for a reference pic but i only have the description so hopefully someone can help

\all i now is that this anime female is wearing blue lingerie or some blue outfit, she has ling pink hair, in that hair is a star like clip and she is dancing in what i could best describe as like a strip tease, the background looks to be darkish and i once saw her on a YouTube video where she was in the intro. I looked through my YouTube history for 2 years and nothing so either i missed it or it was removed. so if anyone knows who this might be please let me know

After some thinking about what i want to get done i am finally going to make a journal with the basic stiff i want to get done and maybe a few comments them.


There are my ideas i want to get drawn over time when i can find an artist i can afford and so on.


Solo ideas:

Kitoth solos: 2 or 3 i have in mind atm.
Kitirina Solos: 3 idea i have atm i would like to see
Luma Solos: got 3 as well for her in mind
Predaking solos: 2 in mind atm
also have 3 others characters in mind but would like to keep those a secret for now. there are 1 idea for each.

M\f ideas:

I have for this section 4 ideas all involving Kitoth with someone but i do not want to post those character names atm. Sort of want to surprise some with those lol.


M\M ideas:
Yes i do have a few i would like to see done, They would involve Kitoth with someone, atm a no named lion cause i am not sure of a name and the look would be similar i guess. maybe another with someone else but i need i guess ideas and such.


anyway yeah my current idea list in basic format. I hope i cna get some of these done and such.

Well after thinking some i think i finally deiced on the first 3 image si want to get done. just need to find someone i can afford and so on.

Also i think i am gonna change the name of the lioness to Katirina just cause i want to be able to use the nickname of Kat over another Kit. also will be a cousin and i think yeah Kitoth and her will be in pics, just need to think what would be good for first image.



Aside from that i have been dealing with some frustration. stress and yeah depression over a few hings most notably is my dental issues. i need teeth removed and fixed and so on, but because of my high anxiety and sensitive gag reflex,, i just can't go to any dentist or oral surgeon, i need to find one that can sedate me, but that is where my current stress\frustration is, in my area i have found not one single oral surgeon that can help me, due to my age and how they don't sedate people over 18, and based on early talk i had with my doctor and oral surgeon places i called my best bet is in Boston, but that also is an issue cause i live like 50 miles away so its a long trek to get there in a timely fashion let alone go there for what could be a long sedation period etc. so yeah makes me depressed not knowing what to do,. I just feel lost about it, but i need to get my teeth worked on soon and this pandemic has not helped either.

Well i need some help. I want to get some new pics drawn but when it comes to some poses i want it can be hard to explain without a reference image and well those can be hard to find so does anyone know a free program i can use where i can make a pose i want for reference?



As for the images i want here is what i am thinking about trying to get and if you want more info let me know.


1: Best way i can describe this is is one were to look over a railing to a view of something like the sea, city, valley etc. and the angle would be liek a side view were you can see the persons face, back-side and some of the front.

the outfit and character would be most likely Lioness and outfit i was aiming toward some shorts that show of the rear well and either a low cut tank showing the underside of her breasts well or maybe tied-up t-shirt or even bra\bikini top. maybe make it x-mas themed.


2: the second idea i would like to get done is rather simple and even have a reference for this

https://www.furaffinity.net/view/27413329/

that is basically the pose, angle would be more front so to see ll over her and outfit i was thinking a sexy x-mas or not bustier like this: https://media-api.xogrp.com/images/.....8262~rs_1280.h

Would be a lioness as well


3: The 3rd idea i have is also simple and have a ref image as well, its basically a pose like ones of these:

https://www.deviantart.com/sanoboss.....fa-2-864575161
https://www.deviantart.com/teemutai.....dies-864272988
https://www.deviantart.com/sanoboss.....tary-864577110

Character would be Lioness and outfit not yet thought on much


4: the 4th idea i have is a pose like this: https://www.deviantart.com/yichimo/.....nata-826051957

is would be again lioness as outfit was thinking a pair some sexy boxers or panties and top maybe loose t-shirt or halter top style bra\top


5:the lat one i have in mind it a M\F pic with a pose that hopefully i can explain without needing a ref since that might be hard to find. The pose is basically the male standing behind the female and you can see his face, hand and other parts, but in font of the male is the female facing the viewer and the males hands\fingers are covering her breasts some, and tail tip maybe covering her lower bits as a tease with the female looking happy\pleased and the male smiling or grinning or even kissing her neck. would love to eee alt version where tail is not in the way or something more erotic but i know that would be extra lol.

After doing some thinking i want to get some new name ideas for the lioness i created who is currently names Kitrina. SO what i am looking for is maybe a new name unless people think the name is good and also what is she to Kitoth is she a sister, cousin or just friend? let me know what you all think and so on:

Here are some images of her that have been drawn:

https://www.furaffinity.net/view/31572360/

https://www.furaffinity.net/view/31571981/

https://www.furaffinity.net/view/31571954/


Anyway thank all who help in advance

Happy 40th b-day to me, yay,, ugh i am old lol

I want to get a new pic of Kitoth but well not sure how much the idea i have will cost me so if anyone can help let me know.

what i would like to get done is a pic series sort of but it would be Kitoth in a select pose or poses where it has maybe 4-5 alternative pics but same pose just maybe wearing something else or nothing. I thought of it like a Daikamura where 1 pic is Kitoth dressed casually, 2nd would be maybe boxers only, 3rd would be nude but tamish, 4th would be nude but more mature and last one maybe a outfit that i sorta sexy like maybe tight shorts or something like that.

Problem is i do not know how much it would cost or ever where to begin to look. so that is where i would like some help

ok finally got my thoughts together and i do want to finally get some stuff commissioned again,

Here is what i would like to get done over time

4 female solo pic that are suggestive or nude
1-2 solo male that is suggestive or nude

4 M\f images of adult nature

2 m\m pics of adult nature



I am also trying to find someone who could write some adult themed stories. I have 4 ideas atm all are M\F

I don't want to go into details here cause i am not sure how lucky i will get on finding someone on both the artwork and stories.


if you need to know a price range it no higher than 40-50 per pic and as for story well not sure what they would be. the pic i would want in color with simple or no BG. well yeah guess that is it

Well another November 5th another year older. I need to get more active and also start looking around to get stuff i want done like stories and pics etc. oh well i am tired lol

Decided to make a future artwork want list journal so i can have it all in one spot and then eb able to know what i want to get done at some point so here is that list:

Solo images:
Kitoth ( i really need new solo ones form tame to nude etc just need ideas)
Luma
Predaking
Kiara
Lari
Valentine
Kitirina


M\F images:
Kitoth x Luma
Kitoth x Kiara
Kitoth x Predaking
Kitoth x Valentine
Kitoth x Lari
Kitoth x Toni-Sernin
Kitoth x Risew

M\H or M\M images

Kitoth x Lomsat
Kitoth x Marbles


Fan-art related:
Katt (Breath of Fire 2)
Renamon(Digimon)
Anthro Nala or Vitani
Mirage(Aladdin tv)
Demona(Gargoyles)
Krystal(Star Fox)


For now that is it but will edit this to add or remove some in case i do not have an ok from someone in case there is reasons but for now they are ok with images

Going to keep this as simple as i can.

A friend who i sometimes play some PC games has need of a new PC, she is going from a laptop that just won't cut it anymore, currently her graphics card seems ot be failing, she can only be on for about 20 min before things just do not work, so i am helping her build a desktop PC since i know more than her and have some ppl i can ask as well about builds, Now for my part i again only know so much. so i need some help

I want to get a build for her that is i want to say between the $500-600 range though going over is not an issue just trying to keep it low since money is tight for her.

She does not need a monitor, mouse or keyboard.

Based on what i see atm on Newegg here is what I am thinking:

Ram: 16gig(8x2)
Mobo: intel though not sure which
CPU: thinking of going with an I5 or I7
Video card: Nvidia Geforce 10 series
HDD: either a 500gb SSD or a 1 TB HD
Case: no idea
DVD burner: most likely an LG like i had before i got my blue ray

Now this is where i need help. I am not sure what Mobo, CPU , GPU and case would work best that is not super expensive, so if anyone can help me on that it would be great.

I really want o help here out since i know what its like not being able to use a Pc for games and such and needing to get a new one.

she wants to be able to play MMo games as well as games like overcooked 2, warframe and maybe a few fps's without having to go to low settings or hell not even being able to run it. So again if anyone can help please let me know

Its a long shot but gonna ask anyway

A friend of mine won a Battlefield 5 digital game code for Xbox 1, its teh base game and well she does not own an Xbox 1 and also probably would not want to play the game so she is trying to see if she can sell it to get some money toward getting a Switch.

she is trying to get $45-50 for the code but not sure where she can sell it safely so here i am helping her out seeing if anyone might want it or knows a place she can sell it safely

Does anyone know any good sites to look for some key-chains or things that can be key-chains.

What i am looking for are the following:

Lucy Heartfillia key-chain
Sinon from SAO key-chain
Lina Inverse keychain

If possible something like this:

https://www.ebay.com/itm/Sword-Art-.....-/153266875325

Not sure what type of key-chain that is but basically some portraits would be good or good looking figures of them for key-chains

Well with my b-day next month I am making a journal of pics i want to get done as well as a b-day wish list of some fan-at for me with like a b-day message to me so umm yeah.


pics need to get done:

Solo pics:

Naomi
Kitirina
Zekumas's female character: Kathrine
Predaking
Luma
Kitoth

couples pics:
Kitoth and Naomi
Kitoth and Kiara
Kitoth and Lomsat
Kioth and Herm Marbles
Kitoth and Katherine
Zekumas and Kitirina
Kitoth and Valentine(duo's well known character)


Fan-art: either solo or paired with Kitoth

Lucario fem
Blaziken fem
Anthro Nala
Anthro Vitani
Renamon
Krystal
Pysme(Sigma Star Saga)
Demona from garoyles
Katt from breath of fire 2
Mirage from Aladdin



Mind you i am not expecting anything from anyone but i wanted to at least post something and such

Anyone willing to help em some Kulve Siege runs, just need a group really if you know what your doing. randoms rooms have not been good for me

gonna keep this simple

I have Fallout 3 GotY on steam, U want to mod it but well i never modded before so i need some help.

I know some mods i want to use form nexus mods but i am not sure if they are working right or not. So if anyone is willing to help me please send me a note.

Also i still have issues with the game minimizing even though i followed all i could find on fixing it.

Ok i seriously want the armor as does a female friend of mine and well we cannot do this with just the two of us so with that said i am going to ask pretty much a begging question

Is tehre anyone who will help my friend and I get the kill and parts for the weapons and armor, we want ti so bad and we just have no luck at all

I use a insect Glaive and she uses a Great sword but we both are not the best at the game so please if anyone is willing to help us let me know

Well as i wait for various artist to finish with what they are working on for me i want to get some new images drawn:

I am looking to get 5 images done:

1 is a solo female image of a lioness in a simple outfit

And the remaining images are M\F though one is going to be M\herm one

1 i with the lioness in the solo image, the 2nd is another Kiara image that is a sweet one, one with the herm is something i wanted to do for a while with a certain bunny, and the last is a more adult image with well someone who i want to surprise lol.

price range is at most $30 since again limited funds a month and would like color so if anyone at all can help please leave a comment or note me.

I know i am asking a lot with the price range but its what i can afford atm

Does anyone have Monster Hunter World for PS4 and well far enough along they might be able to help me out in getting Nergigante parts. I been trying to a week to gets horns and tails for armor and weapons but i just have horrible luck.

I don't use a mic for my Ps4 because i need to find and charge it and i have tried opening it up to randoms but no luck.

ok i need to make this simple and as plain as i can:

I am looking to get two pics done both mature to adult in nature:

One would be a solo female image that is for sure mature but may go into more adult/

The other is a M\F pic that is adult in nature

I have all refs i need and info as well

I am looking to get the solo for around $25 at most and he M\Fm pic maybe $35 at most might be more flexible

Male is Lion anthro, Female is cheetah

Please let me know if you would be willing either in reply or Pm