http://www.bbc.com/news/world-us-canada-28749702

You were one of my favorite actors.. If only I had gotten the chance to meet you..

So many people that you left behind will miss you greatly..

I feel so sick.. I could throw up.. Upon seeing that sight.. Elsa.. W-why couldn't I have saved you.. Why didn't I hear your calls for help when you needed me..
It sickens me.. My room was right next to the room with the birds.. And I could have saved her!!
You must have been so scared.. I'm so sorry..
This morning I woke up hearing my mother cry out in agony.. I rushed out to the pet room.. And there is my baby Parakeet, Elsa.. Hanging.. Dead from a damn rope toy we got from Walmart.. Like a noose around her neck..
Please.. PLEASE.. Never get your bird toys from Walmart..!
I can't get the image out of my mind and it's killing me.. She was only a baby.. And.. I couldn't save her.. I am emotionally destroyed..
Brian says that her wing might have got stuck and she couldn't get free.. And the more she struggled.. The more tangled she became..

Please. I need help..

I start college on the 18th and I need $$ for College books and to get my laptop fixed for college.
I was denied for Financial Aid because I'm only doing one class.. But I'm going to this Math 1 class 4 days a week.. And we are barely making it by.

I badly need the funds.

If you can help in anyway by commissioning me or spreading the news in a journal, I would be so very appreciative. <3

I am opening up for commissions.
I normally don't use these sort of prices, I try my best to keep my prices low because the economy..
But I badly need the funds.

I need the money to get my laptop fixed before I start school on the 18th of this month, I also need to pay for books for class.
I wasn't able to apply for Financial Aid this semester because you need to have two classes or more..
But I already have a lot on my plate with my math class being 5 days a week.
My mother is working all the time and barely making enough to support us..
I know everyone is having a hard time with money too, but I really appreciate the help. ; w ;

My Price sheet: http://www.furaffinity.net/view/14161853/

The wireless internet card in my laptop has stopped working.. It was working just fine and then suddenly the internet stopped working even though it still said I was connected to the network.

It works just fine with Netflix on our tv and on my mother's laptop and I did multiple virus scans on my laptop and it came out clean, I checked in the settings, I did everything I could find to do on Google search.. And still nothing.

So please forgive me if I don't post any art for awhile. I don't have the money to get it fixed and I can't ask my dad since he paid $335 on paying for my college math class for the Fall, since I didn't have enough time to fill out for Financial Aid before the deadline to pay for my classes.

I really need my laptop for school.. It has all of my school information on it and everything. Going to call Marty and see if he can come by and check out my laptop and see what is wrong with it.

Yep! That's right! Free Art!

My mate is trying to get back into the swing of things about her art and she is doing free sketches. She does ADORABLE art work! So please! Go check her out! I will love you all so so much, you amazing watchers you~!

Journal ~>>>> http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/5981506/

I think I might be coming down with something.. ; w ; I feel so achy and exhausted.. I been in bed pretty much all day.. Oh, I hope I'm not getting sick.. TT_TT My head is pounding.. My body is stiff and sore.. I hate it. *Curls up in my bed and whimpers* This is one miserable Asguardian pup..

I swear.. A lot of people in the Fur-Fandom make me think of Guinnie Pigs. Rattle a plastic bag of drama and they all go nuts.

I have never been in a fandom with so much drama and it seems everyone attacks or insults everybody.
I mean, seriously people?? I thought as a fandom, we were all supposed to stick together and fight against the fur-haters.. Not fight each other.

All I see anymore is " This fursuit maker did this, this fur did that.. Don't commission this person or that person.. " Oh! And another one that I heard from someone.. " Ew, why did you buy from that suit maker/artist? Such a waste of money! "

It seems that the ones who mostly get the hate and fire are fursuit makers.. I mean.. Honestly? I'm tired of fursuit haters hating other fursuit makers.. So, what.. If I became a fursuit maker, would people automatically start hating me now??? FURSUITS ARE WHAT MAKE THE FUR-FANDOM!
I'm afraid to commission anyone in fear I might be harassed because I chose to commission someone to make me a suit.. It's childish and stupid..

I get it.. It's your source of income.. But still, doesn't mean you have to be an ass to other fursuit makers.. As a proud member of this community.. We should be getting along..

I honestly have no words to describe how much it upsets me of how fursuit makers treat each other.. Aren't furries supposed to be welcoming with open arms? That's why I joined the fur fandom in the first place, because I thought it was like one big huge family.. Like a wolf pack..

Why do I need tv when I can just go through FA and read up on some drama.
I thought High School was full of drama.. Nope! High School just seems like the cherry on top of a large piece of cake compared to the fur-fandom.

While the Guinnie Pigs squeal.. I'll just be the silent little hamster curled up and hiding in my hamster bed of paper. LOL Any non Guinnie Pigs wish to join me?

I cannot wait, it's going to be so much fun! <3 <3

In other news.. I have a bad ear infection.. And my mom is so busy working.. I can't get to the doctors.. It hurts so much I feel like crying.. I'm using Auro-Dri and hope it helps some.. Even though it's for water clogged ears.. TT - TT; I wish I was driving so I could drive myself to the doctors..

A update since my grandfathers death.
I feel a lot better.. And I want to thank my commissioners for understanding and having patience while I go through the process of grieving. I will be working on your YCH commissions this week! <3

To Do::

1. *Paid* Finished

2. *Paid* Finished

3. *Paid*

* 1st picture Finished
* 2nd picture
* 3rd picture

4. *Paid* Finished

5. *Waiting Payment*

6. *Paid*

I am so angry! Just.. ER! If it wasn't for my mother or me going onto my personal FB account instead of my RPing accounts.. I probably wouldn't have known about my grandfather till weeks later!

I am so sick of my Dad's side of the family treating me as if I am this overly fragile child who can't handle anything! I am 22 years old! Yet they treat me as if I am still 6 years old!

It's like with my dog Licorice.. I had him since he was a small puppy.. He was my dog too.. And then my Dad gave him to my grandparents.. I didn't hear about his death till three weeks later because I mentioned him and my mother told me about him! And she was surprised I didn't know about him..

I'm tired of being kept in the dark about EVERYTHING! It feels like they don't want me to know anything about them.. I only found out about my grandfather's stroke through Facebook..!

I'm beyond angry.. And hurt.. All this time my family in California constantly told me.. " He's doing okay " " He's slowly getting better " " He's going to make it "

NO, STOP THE LIES! IF IT WERE TRUE, HE WOULDN'T BE IN THE GROUND RIGHT NOW! Why can't they just be open with me.. Instead of sugar coating all over it like they do with Children.. Why..

I thought he was doing good and slowly getting better.. But apparently my family in California has been keeping me in the dark as always..

I found out this morning by my mother that my grandfather passed away last night..

I am stunned and not sure what to think.. I know I should be crying and very sad.. I am, but.. I'm more in disbelief then anything else. I know for sure it will hit me hard soon.. But till then. You might have to wait a little longer for your YCH/Commissions.. I'm sorry..

So far so good. Hopefully this week will be the last of the moving process. @-@; So I can get to work on the YCH.
I want to thank those who are waiting patiently! You guys are awesome people for understanding! Q w Q <3 <3 <3

http://www.livestream.com/kneel4loki13

I want to apologize for my delay on getting your YCH commissions done. I haven't been feeling very well the past few days.. ): But I promise to get them all done when I can. Between moving to a new home, rushing to get things finished for Metrocon, and now coming down with a little bug.. Things have been a bit stressful.

Just wanted to let you know that I have not forgotten about you!

I want to apologize for my delay on getting your YCH commissions done. I haven't been feeling very well the past few days.. ): But I promise to get them all done when I can. Between moving to a new home, rushing to get things finished for Metrocon, and now coming down with a little bug.. Things have been a bit stressful.

Just wanted to let you know that I have not forgotten about you!

I just had to repost this.. I found it truly inspiring and gave me such confidence. It actually brought me to tears.. :')

I hope it has the same effect on you that it did with me.. Every artist needs a little pick me up once in awhile.

http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/5776114/ <-- Link to original journal.


A little word, from the bottom of my soul...

People, Artists, Beginers like Confirmed, Professionnal like Hobbyist....

STOP BEING SCARED OF DRAWING!


_ Stop being scared of haters rolling on you for drawing a pose you LOVE.
_ Stop being scared of people telling you that what you LOVE is wrong.
_ Stop being scared of people not loving the style you LOVE.
_ Stop being scared of people harrassing you because you do what you LOVE.
_ Stop being scared of people that judge you on what you LOVE.
_ Stop being scared of showing what you LOVE.
_ Stop being scared of venting yourselves in Art.
_ Stop being scared of upping your prices if you feel under-paid.
_ Stop being scared of saying NO.
_ Stop being scared of assuming yourselves.
_ Stop being scared of showing off your talent.

+ Because poses are not copyrighted to anyone.
+ Because we all love different things.
+ Because each style is UNIQUE and worth it.
+ Because if they run after you, it's because you worth it, and you can always block them.
+ Because you are YOU, not what you love, and we don't decide what we love.
+ Because it's ok to let know people that we enjoy some things more than others.
+ Because it's better outside than inside, and drawing is better than bullying/violenting someone else!
+ Because you WORTH it and you put hard time, efforts and LOVE in your work!
+ Because you have the RIGHT to not wanting drawing some stuff!
+ Because you are YOU, and no one can ever change it, never forget that accepting yourself is the most important thing, and you DESERVE it.
+ Because if you have it, SHOW IT.

DON'T BE SCARED BECAUSE YOU ARE A BEGINER.
Each Confirmed artist were drawing shits at the begining. You CAN'T be a kind of "lvl over 9000" born.
Being Confirmed means WORKS, PRACTICE, DOODLE, LEARN HOW TO LOVE WHAT YOU DO, DEVELOP SELF-ESTEEM, BELIEVE IN YOURSELF, DOESN'T BEING SCARED OF TRYING NEW THINGS.

Mixt things togheter, draw any shit you want. Mixed potatoe-cheese-watermelon-dog! WHO CARES.
Try to make it look cute, GIVES YOURSELVES MINI-GOALS.

Fuck off the judgement of others when you post that potatoe-cheese-watermelon-dog! Fuck their judgement! Who cares if they loves it or no, if YOU loves it?

IT'S YOUR ART.
YOUR CREATION.
YOUR LOVE.
PIECE OF YOU.
DON'T BE SCARED OF IT.
EXPRESS IT.

LET.
IT.
OUT.

Imagination and creation have NO LIMITS.

Never be scared of exploring new styles, new tricks, painting, brushes, whatever, even if you are an confirmed professional. TRY.

Try cost NOTHING and can makes you discover a way to improove when you think it's impossible and that you have reach your limit.

NO.
LIMIT.

There's some people that lives their life enjoying colors that others have merged to get something.
and
There's some people that lives their life playing with those colors.


It's with working without taking care of the "known-things" limits that we discover new things.

And it apply to everything...

Science...
Food...
Animals...
Drawing...

No limits.


SO TO ALL OF YOU.
Yes, YOU, that are scared to post/do your drawings, STOP BEING SCARED.

SHOW YOURSELVES.
SHOW YOUR HEARTS.

We WANT to see the colors that your soul want to put on the paper/digital canvas.
SHOW US.
AND FUCK THE JUDGEMENT.


SHOW YOUR COLORS.


~ From an Artist that have start with nothing, and climbed each steps one by one, falling sometimes, but climbing them again. Cynn.

I hate doing this. But, not having a job or a college refund since I missed the chance to sign up for Summer classes.
I really need the money..

If you could spread the word, I am open for commissions. Something I thought I would never do again. ; w ;


I promised myself I would never do commissions again.
But I really need the money.. It would be so very helpful if I could get some commissions so I can order a few things I need for my costume for Metrocon..

Any gender and any species.

Prices:

Sketch - $5

Flat color - $10

Shaded - $15

Detailed background - $5 extra ( Because I hate doing back grounds )

~Submission Details~

Name:
Ref sheet: (Please a full body in color)
Breed:
Any small details of what you want in the picture.

Rules:

* I'm sorry, but I don't do fetishes or porn of any kind.

* Nudes? As far as nude drawings go.. On male and female.. I will only do the chest area. Everything else will be covered up.

* I only accept pay-pal and if you send it through pay-pal.. Please do it under " sending money to a friend " instead of through purchase.

* Pay first then I can get down to you're drawing. Had too many incidents where I would draw it first and ask for the money after.. And the customer would save and post the art work WITHOUT paying.. That or bitch and complain that I did something wrong and take the drawing anyway without paying me.. ):

* If there is something you want me to change.. Please tell me nicely.. I am a person who tries to please and do not need to be screamed or cursed at over something that I can easily change..

I am only taking 6 people at a time. So it's a first come first serve.

1. *Waiting payment*

2.

3.

4.

5.

6.

I promised myself I would never do commissions again.
But I really need the money.. It would be so very helpful if I could get some commissions so I can order a few things I need for my costume for Metrocon..

Any gender and any species.

Prices:

Sketch - $5

Flat color - $10

Shaded - $15

Detailed background - $5 extra ( Because I hate doing back grounds )

Character Details~

Name:
Ref sheet: (Please a full body in color)
Breed:
Any small details of what you want in the picture.

Rules:

* I'm sorry, but I don't do fetishes or porn of any kind.

* Nudes? As far as nude drawings go.. On male and female.. I will only do the chest area. Everything else will be covered up.

* I only accept pay-pal and if you send it through pay-pal.. Please do it under " sending money to a friend " instead of through purchase.

* Pay first then I can get down to you're drawing. Had too many incidents where I would draw it first and ask for the money after.. And the customer would save and post the art work WITHOUT paying.. That or bitch and complain that I did something wrong and take the drawing anyway without paying me.. ):

* If there is something you want me to change.. Please tell me nicely.. I am a person who tries to please and do not need to be screamed or cursed at over something that I can easily change..

I am only taking 6 people at a time. So it's a first come first serve.

1.

2.

3.

4.

5.

6.

I have some good news! I spoke to my father today and he said that my grandfather has opened his eyes and is conscious.

He attended therapy today.. Due to the stroke, he isn't functioning very well.. So, he will need a lot of help, attention, and therapy. But other then that, he is improving..!

He's a strong man.. I knew he wasn't going to go down that easy.. Thank you everyone for your support. It means so much to me. ; w ; <3

I will keep everyone up to date with as much as I know.

This morning I was sound asleep, well, partly from my phone MP3 player on and my mother called me..
She told me that my grandfather on my Dad's side has had a major stroke and is in critical condition and he's unresponsive..

Grandpa Ed was his name.. He was a strong, stubborn, but yet very warm hearted man.. He was artistically talented.. He would paint beautifully done animal designs on rocks.. And he would carve the most amazing wood carvings.. We still even have a key holder close to the front door which he made for my father,mother, and older brother John when he was just a baby..
He encouraged me to draw.. And taught me a thing or two..
He always knew how to make us laugh..

It's the little memories I can cherish..

As I sit here and type this.. I am overwhelmed with grief and disbelief.. And hoping and praying that somehow.. Someway he can pull through..

Being so far away makes it all the more painful.. I just want to say to my family, through this rough time.. Even though I am states away.. I am still here for you and we will get through this somehow.. I love you all..

Okay.. It's official.. I am SO SICK OF THIS APARTMENT COMPLEX!!

It was before I took my shower!! I had just taken out the trash and needed to grab another bag of trash to clean up the living-room before I take my s-shower.. I'm sitting on the couch and I suddenly hear the door open, so I'm like.. Oh, my mom's home! *shaking* I heard a soft whispering voice and I stood up and noticed my bedroom door was open and as I approach the door I'm like.. " Hello? Mom? "

And out walked 4 COMPLETE STRANGERS FROM MY BEDROOM!
They stared at me and gasped and said " OMG we're in the wrong house!! " So they all left..

I am shaking so bad right now..!

Do you like Marvel? Spiderman, Deadpool, Avengers, X-men? YOU NAME IT! :D

What if you could get a icon of YOUR fursona dressed as your favorite Marvel Hero or Villain! I have a great treat for you!

My mate is doing a special deal sale for custom Marvel icons!

She really needs the monies. ;w; She's a talented Artist and is willing to work anything out, just please send her a note and she will be more then HAPPY to work out a deal! <3

If not, then please help spread the word! I would love you all so very much for it.

Here is the link to the journal! ---> http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/5720620/

Ugh! My biggest problem of the daaay! I have $40 on my Steam and I BADLY wanted to get the Deadpool game.. STUPID DISNEY MADE STEAM TAKE IT DOWN!!! UGH! The ONE game I badly wanted to play! >-<;
Now I don't know what to get..

I was debating on getting Bioshock Infinite.. But then there is Devil May Cry 4. Also there is Silent Hill Homecoming which looks good!
They are also coming out with Amazing Spiderman 2.
Oh yeah and Lego The Hobbit.

*Face/desk* Too many options.