<rant>
So I got this letter last Thursday saying I had to provide proof of my and my spouse's income for the last five years before Social Security will decide weather or not they need to pay me the benefits they've awarded me...

Thing is, I have had no spouse or income these last five years, and there's no institution I know of that will provide a $0.00 check stub. I spent three hours on Friday trying to get someone on the phone at the number they provided, at 31 minutes and 26 seconds their recording plays a loud tone for four seconds and hangs up on you, so after that happened six times I gave up and went to bed with the resolution to try again Monday. Monday my phone had gone dead, so I tried today, got someone on the line at 22 minutes and 12 seconds (cell phone timing thing is neat). She said I would have to visit the office to tell someone I have no proof of income or bank statements or any of that because I had no income or accounts. I also notice that the letter states FEB 2, today, is the last day I can do this before they just decide to deny me benefits.

Make it down to the office where I am number 86 in the fifth of five queues. Got around to calling my number and it's just to check me in. The wait will be a little over two hours, would I like to wait or make an appointment? I chose to make an appointment, which means I needed to wait another 10 minutes for another person to speak with me. I give this lady my social security number and she asks if I want to re-file for disability benefits. I told her what I was doing there, and she starts to make the appointment, do I want an office visit or a phone call? Now I'm expecting a phone call on the 23rd at 11am, hopefully that will be the right person to tell I haven't had an income in the last five years, since the last three folks couldn't help me.
</rant>

Edit: I also (finally) received my Lyrica by FedEx after being off it for four weeks. It's a pill that helps with the fibromyalgia pain. In the regular mail I got a letter telling me why they can't fill my prescription for Lyrica...

ALSO, today is Groundhog's Day. If I must repeat a day over and over again I hope it's not this one.

I'd been sick the previous three weeks with some sort of stomach bug, but that broke Thursday night. drove in to celebrate with me and . On Saturday we went out with our room mate for some Red Robin (tastey, tastey burgers), did a little shopping, and saw Avatar in 3D again. Sunday we went out for sushi and played co-op Borderlands. It was simple, but quite a lot of fun :)

Only down parts were that my folks forgot my birthday again, and I wasn't feeling up to anything more exciting that dinner, a movie, and video games.

I really can't express how thankful I am to have close friends and a great love. I went without any celebrations for so long, it's somewhat strange to me the anticipation I feel as these little events creep closer on the calander. My birthday barely passed yesterday and I'm already looking forward to Valentines day.

On June 15 of 2005, I was walking to my car to head to work when I was struck with a headache that literally blinded me. Since then I have been unable to work, and it was discovered that the underling cause of the troubles was the same virus that causes mono. My mother had MS, and my father has broken his back twice and had three back surgeries. I did not want to call mononucleosis, or Chronic Fatigue Syndrome as it is also known, a disability. Even so, in December of 2006 I acknowledged that I was not likely to be getting better any time soon, so I filed for Social Security Disability benefits.

Today, 55 months after the onset of my illness, 37 months after my application, and five months after my last hearing I have received notice that I have been approved for benefits. This means I should be getting a check for each month of those benefits dating back to June 17, 2005. Enough money to do some really amazing things. Now I'm just faced with the joyous dilemma of deciding which of those amazing things I'm going to do.

2009 was an odd year for me. I spent half of it waiting for my disability hearing, a couple months getting ready to get to the hearing itself, and the rest of it waiting for a result.

I've been unable to write anything worth the space it's taking up on my hard drive. I've been trying to polish the stories I've already written, but have been finding that difficult as well. I think one of my problems is that I haven't been reading nearly as much as I used to the last several years, and for me reading may be what primes the pumps.

Since 2007 I've wanted an E-Book reader, but haven't been able to afford one. Now I've committed to saving up for an Astak EZ-Reader Pocket Pro.

Amazon provides a digital bookshelf for their Kindle, which they then use as a bit on the bridle of their Kindle store. If you displease them you can lose access to all the books you've bought that are stored online. It's rare, but it's happened, so I don't want to risk it or support them with my money. Not to mention the idea that they can remove a book from your Kindle, as happened with Orwell's 1984 after a mistake was made with copyrights. (The book has gone into public domain in some parts of the world and was reprinted, but in the US there's still another 25 years on the copyright. The reprint was sold when it shouldn't have been, so Amazon removed the book from the Kindles of people who had bought it.) I find that prospect frightening, and it all stems from corporate abuse of Digital Rights Management.

Barnes and Noble appears to be following Amazon's lead with their e-book offerings, so I won't be reading from a Nook. Sony, as a company in general, appears to regard their customers as little more than bags of ambulatory cash. Sony Online Entertainment screwed up Star Wars: Galaxies by not listening to their customers. Sony Vaio at the outset was line of computers that were high on style and mediocre (or worse) on function. Sony Playstation 3, and then Sony Playstation Portable Go are both fine examples of a corporation deciding they know what customers want better than the customers themselves do, then overbuilding and over-marketing. I've learned that it's best to avoid Sony as a brand, so their E-Book reader is out as well.

Now, Astak's Reader (EZ Reader Pocket Pro is such a mouthful, and I've never liked things like EZ in place of Easy) looks like it has everything I've been looking for and then some. Hallelujah. It supports a wide range of either DRM-protected or DRM-free books (20 DRM-free formats according to their press release), that was my primary concern once everyone adopted e-ink screens. It has a SD card slot that will work with up to a 16GB card, meaning you can carry a ridiculous number of books with you wherever you go. It connects to the computer through USB, this seems like something obvious that most readers should have, but most of the service-attached devices (Kindle, Nook) do not have any means of input beyond your internet bookshelf, so that the user is tied to their service. Beyond that, it plays MP3s, lasts for (up to) 8000 page turns on one battery, and has a removeable/rechargeable so you can swap it out when it goes flat. Astak has worked with Adobe to allow their device to do what they're calling "PDF Reflow" which sounds impressive if it means they're using Adobe's algorithms to re-work PDFs for display on their 5-inch screen. And finally, it comes in Black, White, Blue, Red, Pink, and Purple. I think I want the red one.

Went to a midnight showing and DAYum was that a gorgeous film. Both visually and story-wise. Bring an extra bladder, or just get a smaller drink at the concession stand, because it's a full three hours (maybe a little more) and you're not going to want to get up for anything.

In other news, still haven't heard anything from Social Security. It's been three months since the hearing, and I'm guessing it's a positive sign that it's taking so long. I'm thinking it has something to do with this being the fourth fiscal quarter and the economy being what it is. I have high hopes for January, maybe I'll have a big check for my birthday.

Speaking of legal crap, I went to court for the big ol' lawsuit, thinking it was going to be the trial. Turns out it was a preliminary thing that set the date for the trial. February 16 ... or was it the 19th? It's on my paperwork, but it's too late here to go check. I'll look it up later if anyone is interested.

Tin and I generally hung around for most of the day, then we went to dinner at his parent's place. Roast turkey, dressing, mashed potatoes, sweet potatoes, steamed veggies, rolls, gravy, and this really nice Zinfandel. I even managed a sliver of pumpkin pie. The company was great, and the food delicious.

Then we came home and enjoyed a second dinner with our room mate's family and even more of the usual trimmings. Once everyone was full, we sat around and played Beatles Rock Band. Great caper to a wonderful evening.

Hope everyone had as much fun as we did this year!

This is the time of year when we here in the States start reflecting on those things for which we are thankful. Two years ago I didn't celebrate holidays. Holidays for me have always been times for closeness with family and friends, and without those all I had were empty reminders of everything I had lost on the path to becoming myself.

Last year I fell in love with a really amazing raccoon, and hey, what'd'ya'kno he loves me back. For the first time in 12 years I wanted to celebrate holidays again, and it's all thanks to the furry fandom that brought me together with the love of my life. I am most thankful for the love I share with Tincrash, but all of you who read this are a pretty close second on my list. I hope you each have a measure of the joy you've brought me with our interactions over the past several years.

Really and truly, Thank You.

The con was aMAZing. Had a blast the whole entire time.

Got to hang around a bit with my good friend, Austin. She was rooming with us, but she is more of a social butterfly than I am. I spent most of my time behind a dealer's table talking to people, which was quite fun. We were situated next to , who was really cool and who I'm eventually going to commission for a raccoon head tattoo design.

On Friday Tin and I hosted a panel on developing a character through art and writing. I've attended less than ten panels in my life, and this was the first I hosted. It was so much fun. We had a pretty good turnout, and were rather loose in our presentation, but I believe it was a pretty successful panel.

Last night Tincrash and I met up with  timkangaroo for the third time at the con. This time neither of us were particularly pressed for time, so we finally got to talk. Good times there. Then we were hanging around with  picklejuice until we had to leave for a get together with fellow NAF members,  flinters, Tibo, Bucky, and Gene Breshears. Then I got a text from D.C. Simpson, the cartoonist behind Ozy and Millie, letting me know she was free to meet up for this thing we had been trying to get done all weekend. So in one night I was blessed with the opportunity to hang out with a whole bunch of artists whose work I've followed for a decade or so. Managed to meet up with them all in four distinct groups, and found that they were each a whole bunch of fun to hang out with. The last night sort of capped and eclipsed the whole rest of the con for me.

I'm exhausted. Had a Sci-Fi con last weekend where I got a metric ton of good info on writing and getting myself published. Spent a week trying to get my Captain Distractable of a raccoon ready to be Guest of Honor at MFF. Then had an amazing Furry con. It's a good kind of tired, but I don't think I'll get to rest much until after Thanks Giving some time. :p

PostScript:
Oh Yeah! And thanks to the charity that came out this weekend, I got to pet a Linx, two Skunks, a small crocodile, a Kinkajou, and a Fenic! I want a skunk so bad :p

This morning, about five minutes before Opening Ceremonies, we were informed that we did have a dealer's table after all. We kind of went into manic mode getting it all set up, Tin is doing his usual $10 full color badges, $15 pencil /$20 ink /$25 colored full page character sketches.

I'm holding down the table while Tin takes care of his GoH duties. We're at table 58, near the entrance off the side hall or the back left corner from the entrance off the main hall. At the very least, stop by and say Hi. We love to meet people :D

We had a friend watch the table while we did our first panel this evening. It was about the tenth panel I've ever attended, and the first time I've hosted a panel. Had so much fun, I think I'm addicted :p

Got to meet , really cool artist who I've talked to a bit on FA, but meeting her was awesome.
Spoke a bit with , who I first talked to when he volunteered for the spectrafox benefit auction last year. That was really cool.
Hung around a bit with , who has a bunch of really cool badges at his booth. Got a couple for Noel and myself.

All in all, I'm awfully sore, but enjoying the heck out of the con. Mebby expect another update at the end of con, unless there's more news ;)

SO I'm going to be at MFF with the love of my life. We're doing at least one panel together, Write and Draw an Effective Character, at 6pm in the Maple room. Other than that I'll probably be in the con suite thing near the artist's ally.

If you want to meet up with me or us at another time, send me a note and I'll reply with my cell number, which you can text me to meet up when it's convenient for you.

Hope to meet lots and lots of people this year :D

Jeebers!

Lots of good sci-fi goodness, and a whole crapton of interesting writing and related panels. Had a blast, but need sleeps. Lots and lots of them. Mebby more tomorrow, but I'll probably be getting Tin ready for MFF all week.

Where will you be most of the time during the day/s?
Probably "The Den" if I'm not sitting next to my love in one of the panels.

Where are you staying?
At the con hotel. The Westin? Don't remember the name of the place :p

Who will you be with?
My awesome awesome boyfriend!

Do you do free art?
Nope. Not unless someone really really wants a scrawled mess in their book :p

Do you do trades?
Only if the other party has a story they want written.

Do you do commissions?
I've tried to, but nobody has ever been interested :/

Do you have prints/ CDs ?
Nope

Do you do badges?
Nope

What is your gender?
I'm a chick

How old are you?
Old enough.

Can I touch you?
I'm always up for a hug!

Can I talk to you?
Please do!

Can we hang out?
Most likely, unless I'm in a high-action mood (getting ready to host a panel ect)

Can I look in your sketchbook?
Nope, I haven't got one :p

Can I draw in your sketchbook?
If I get one, I'd be delighted to have moar arts!

Can I buy you a drink?
Free drink? Yes please!

Can I take your picture?
Hey, it's your lense to crack :p

I'm too shy to talk to you!
No need to be, I'm pretty personable and love meeting people.

What do you look like?
Tall. No, taller. Yeah, about that tall. Stupid blond hair. Blue eyes. A little pudge. Wearing Disney's Stitch ears, if I can find them.

Tincrash and I are going to be there. Tin is one of the Guests of Honor.

I was hoping to have my disability check by the con, but with the con starting in two weeks I'm thinking it's unlikely. Maybe I can get nifty arts next year :p

So I've decided to do a blog about the credit card law suit that will be more concerned with just the technical stuff I'm doing. I'm hoping it can be a bit of a guide for other people who find themselves in a similar situation. URL is http://imbeingsued.blogspot.com/ if you want to give it a look ;)

asked me to do this, so now it's done :p

THREE NAMES YOU GO BY:
Lea or Leasara
Uni
Shannon :p

THREE SCREEN NAMES YOU'VE HAD:
Amalthea
Ldy_Amalthea
Leasara :p

THREE THINGS YOU'VE DONE IN THE LAST 33 MINUTES
Smoked
Watched Web Soup
Read Manga

THREE THINGS YOU LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF:
I'm very proud of my humility?
I think I'm a decent writer.
Thus far my immortality has not bee disproved :p

THREE THINGS YOU DISLIKE ABOUT YOURSELF:
My looks
Low energy levels
Sleep too much

THREE PARTS OF YOUR ORIGINS:
SCOTTISH!
Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints (LDS or Mormons)
High school Drama (class :p )

THREE THINGS YOU'RE AFRAID OF:
My own Mediocrity
Dieing before I'm done
My failing health

THREE THINGS YOU ARE WEARING RIGHT NOW:
An awesome unicorn charm necklace
A pair of jeans
The silver earrings my boyfriend got me

THREE OF YOUR EVERYDAY ESSENTIALS:
My laptop
Teh Interwebs
Kiss from my boyfriend

THREE IMPORTANT OBJECTS:
Sleep Number bed
Beatles Rockband Guitar


THREE OF YOUR FAVOURITE BANDS:
The Beatles
Led Zeppelin
The Delgados

THREE WAYS TO BE HAPPY:
Find something to enjoy in my tasks
Good tea
Coffee with friends

THREE OF YOUR FAVOURITE SONGS AT PRESENT:
Delgados - Light Before We Land
Delgados - Get Action
Red Hot CHili Peppers - Can't Stop

THREE NEW THINGS YOU WANT TO TRY IN THE NEXT 12 MONTHS:
Writin a webcomic
Drawerin a webcomic
Publishin a webcomic

THREE THINGS YOU REGRET:
Not getting to tell Eric how I felt about him
The pain I've caused my family
My inability to help people

THREE THINGS YOU WANT IN A RELATIONSHIP:
There's only one thing I still want in my relationship, he knows what that is so I'm not going to make it public :p

THREE IMPORTANT THINGS YOU'VE GIVEN TO THE WORLD:
Encouragement?
Humor?
mmm... Porn?

TWO TRUTHS AND A LIE:
I do my own form of energy healing I call "Zapping"
I thought I would never have a serious relationship.
My stories are usually based on personal experiences.

THREE PHYSICAL THINGS YOU LIKE IN THE SAME SEX:
Y'know, I get a little confused questions that include a sex/gender option. Do I answer as the gender I am or the gender I was was raised as?

THREE EMOTIONAL THINGS YOU LIKE IN THE SAME SEX:
See above, though I should say I don't really break people down by gender. I generally think people are pretty similar.

THREE THINGS YOU JUST CAN'T DO:
End world hunger
Cultivate World Peace
Make a souffle

THREE THINGS YOU MISS FROM YOUR PAST:
The ability to be physically active
Closeness with my family
My Douglas Adams first editions collection

THREE GIFTS YOU WOULD LIKE TO RECEIVE:
Gift card to cover GRS
New computer
Ebook Reader (that is not a Kindle or Sony product)

THREE REASONS WHY YOU ARE WHO YOU ARE:
My past
My attitude towards my past
The support of friends

THREE OF YOUR FAVOURITE HOBBIES:
Writing
Browsing the Internet
Playing guitar based rhythm games

THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO REALLY BADLY RIGHT NOW:
Celebrate my boyfriend's birthday (but I'm already doing that really badly :p )
Get Weird Al Yankovic to design a house for me
Get myself as fit as I can

THREE CAREERS YOU'RE CONSIDERING:
Novelist
Blogger
Freelance writer

THREE PLACES YOU WANT TO GO FOR HOLIDAY:
Japan
Mammoth Lakes, CA
Disney World

THREE CARTOON CHARACTERS:
Himura Kenshin
Wonder Woman
Shaak Ti? I think she was animated once... :p

THREE BOY’S NAMES:
Tyler
Chaz
Leeland

THREE GIRL'S NAMES:
Cassandra
Lysette
Tatiana

THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO BEFORE YOU DIE:
Become a known writer
GRS
Learn to draw

So, my biggest gripe about Windows 7 so far has been that I was unable to install Q10, my favorite little text editor for writing stories. Every time I tried, I got the very informative message: Error opening file for writing C:\Program Files\Q10\q10.exe. Today I finally focused on the for writing part of the message, checked, and sure enough C:\Program Files is a read-only directory. Every other program I've installed has asked for administrator privileges before it would allow me to install it, Q10 didn't. Right-click on the executable, and Bingo! Run as Administrator.

I am slightly less miffed at Windows 7.

In my last journal, On Loss, my intention was to examine the universality of Loss and to give some advice on dealing with Loss. It seems to me, however, that in describing the types of loss I've experienced so that people wouldn't think I was 'talking out of my ass', I lost track of those goals. Since people have read the first journal I figured I'd do a second journal instead of editing the first.

Everyone experiences loss at sometime or another. My theory is that each loss, big or small, is a catalyst for change. The larger the loss, the more radical the potential changes can be. If you can recognize these opportunities, you can improve your chances that the change will be for the better. The loss of most of my possessions made it easier for me to get out of a bad living situation twice, and of all the possessions I lost I only really miss ten of the books and the bed frame. The loss of a job usually meant new interesting opportunities for employment. The loss of friends made way for new, usually more understanding, friends. That's basically the nature of Change, so long as you don't let your loss drag you down, you'll grow.

The loss of a loved one is a more difficult matter, especially when it's sudden. When my grandfather finally passed at 96 years old, my family drew closer than we had been in a long time as we came together to support each other. It would have been nice if we could have focused on that closeness and made some of it last. When Eric, for whom I had significant feelings, shot himself I wound up losing myself for a while. Recovering from that period taught me a lot about myself, as well as some very precious lessons.

In the initial shock of the event I was mostly focused on the vacuum where his presence should have been and a myriad of regrets, mostly dealing with ways I might have changed the outcome of that night. I was consumed with contemplating the depths of his despair that night and notions of what might have changed if he knew how much I cared for him. As I sit here writing this, I wonder if I had been able to simply appreciate all the good times we had together and the good things we did do for each other, if maybe I might have avoided the nasty path I wound up taking.

I have come to recognize that the event and my eventual recovery prompted a change in me to cherish each individual I come across; to recognize and connect with the best parts of each individual. This has made each of my relationships with family, friends, even my boyfriend much sweeter. Similarly, I find something to enjoy in almost everything I do, and that has made even the most arduous of chores pleasant. I've only been conscious of this change the last year or so, but it has been a part of my general attitude since I came out of my darkness. Of course, none of this makes up for the loss of Eric, none of it makes me miss him less or regret his passing less, but knowing the origins of what has come to be a pretty good thing in my life does soften the edges a bit.

That's wandered a bit on me again, but in general my advice is to cherish each person and each event you get to experience. To help you with that, always remember that, even though the bond you have might be strong as steel cable, Life is still fragile as spun glass. Loss is unavoidable, so when you come to it, rely on those that support you as you need it, provide the support you can for them, look for the opportunities for growth, and learn.

Postscript: I still feel like I haven't done what I set out to do, I feel like I might be treating the subject rather flippantly. Maybe it's because it's so difficult for me to write about. I hope that people can get some comfort or some strength from this, preferably both, but there's a part of me that won't be quiet that questions my arrogance in bringing up all this stuff and it's fighting with the part that wants so badly to help.

This is another little theme that has been rolling around in my head for a while now. Been thinking about writing an essay, and finally getting around to it.

I remember when I was in the fifth grade, ten or eleven years old, and my springer spaniel had to be put down due to illness a week after she went from being the family's dog to officially my dog. I loved her to bits, but my parents wouldn't let me skip school to see her to the vet. I knew the time of her appointment, and as that time approached I became more and more inconsolable. I spent most of the day trying not to cry and I sat out recess on The Bench where kids had to sit when they were being punished. It was the deepest loss I had ever experienced at the time.

I remember when I found out that I wasn't the only person in the world with gender dysphoric feelings. I came out to friends from school and a couple friends from church and more often than not they disappeared soon after. One of them outed me to my little sister at their homecoming dance, ruining my sister's night and igniting a firestorm that still smolders in my Mormon family 13 years later. There were varying degrees of loss and betrayal in each of those friendships as they sizzled and popped and vaporized on the hotplate of my being transgendered. It was the deepest loss I had ever experienced at the time.

I remember in 1997, when my father finally had to be told the truth about why I had stopped going to church and why I was not going to go on a mission for the Mormon faith; the faith he had converted to and that had shaped his life for more than thirty-five years and mine for almost twenty. It very nearly killed him by further stressing his already strained heart. I had expected the family's love, which had been nurtured through the Mormon faith, would hold and they would recognize how necessary it was for me to transition from their son and brother to their daughter and sister. The sluice gates were finally dropped on familial connections which were then some of the last bonds of support I had. It was the deepest loss I had ever experienced at the time.

I remember in 1998 and 1999 when the FBI all but arrested me for the $2 million robbery of the bank vault where I worked. Again, most of my friends distanced themselves from me, some slowly, some rapidly. There was one guy, Eric, I had known for five years, he had almost married my little sister after high school. He and by proxy his little group of friends were the only ones that really helped me through that time, emotionally. I started to develop feelings for Eric after that, but things were complicated with me being transgendered and him having had a relationship-gone-bad with my sister. I finally decided to tell him about my feelings, but he killed himself two days before I was going to see him again. The loss I felt there was too great and overwhelmed me.

I remember in 1999 and 2000 when things had finally gone quiet with the FBI and Eric shot himself. Without the support of good friends and with only vague support from family, I was foundering. Unable to deal with the loss of my first crush, I lost faith in my abilities as a writer when I was unable to pen anything for a memorial wall in Eric's honor. I found myself in emotional depths that had previously gone unsounded by me. As no one seemed to believe in me, I lost faith in myself as well. There existed there a group of people that helped me find solace in the only places they knew themselves; at the bottom of a bottle, or the end of a pipe or syringe. I came to trust people with such provisions as my friends until one of them raped me. The loss of this final illusion tipped me over the edge, and I made it back to my apartment where I tried to kill myself with a bottle of percocet and about half a pint of vodka.

When I finally woke up, I had finally woken up. I used the shock of the rape and waking up not dead to get myself cleaned up and back in the world. For once loss was working in my favor. Things began to get better as I started working real jobs again and could finally start affording medical care I needed to transition. As my body slowly started to reflect the gender I've always known myself to be, I gained confidence. Things were finally looking up.

I remember in 2005 when I tried to go to work and felt like I was dieing. As I was walking to my car in the heat of a Las Vegas June, a splitting headache upset my stomach and began to blind me. I made it back to my apartment and managed to call into work. That was the day I lost my ability to work. As my illness has progressed I've lost the ability to do more and more of the things I've always enjoyed as I lost mobility and stamina. I lost my two bedroom apartment as I lost my savings. I lost the furnishings of that apartment and my library that I had loved so much. Occasionally I find myself reflecting on all the activities I may never do again, or the simple things I'd like to do with my boyfriend but might never feel well enough to, and those losses still manage to rattle me.

I've become rather intimate with the subject of loss over the years. I've learned to let go of things. I've also seen that loss can be the manure that can help you grow. With the loss of my health I've taken up writing again. My writing introduced me to a good friend who introduced me to the love of my life. The loss of my belongings, freed me to get out of a bad situation with my family and eventually move in with my love. I could have done neither if I had to cart around a bedroom, an office, a living room, a dining room, and a kitchen. I'm happier today than I ever thought I could be, so even as rough as it was I can not fault the path I've taken to get where I am.

I heard about Google Voice on TV, probably Attack of the Show on G4. I'm a bit of a Google fangirl, so I had to go check it out. Went to the site, registered for an Invitation, invitation arrived in a day or two, and I set it up last night.

Setting it up, you can use an existing phone number or get a new one for free. I got a phone number in Las Vegas so my family can make local calls to me if they wish. Now, the cool part is, when someone calls that number, it rings on my cell phone. If I wanted it to, it would ring on my cell and my home phone at the same time. It integrates with my existing Google contacts from my Gmail. If I don't have your number in the list and you try to call me, it screens your call; you give the recording your name and I get a call asking if I want to talk to you, I press 1 and we have a nice chat. If I do have your number you get to skip that process and ring right through, so long as I've told the system that' OK. If you're a bill collector or somesuch, I can set up the system to hang up on you or send you right to voicemail :p

Voicemail! That's like the custard-with-strawberries in the middle of the cake! You leave me a voicemail and the system transcribes that message and sends me a text and an email to let me know there's voicemail waiting for me! The text message gives me a short version of the transcription. The email has the whole transcription and a recording of the actual message! I love the voicemail niftyness so much, I set things up so my cell calls go through all that as well.

And I even found something I didn't mind watching! Amazing!

I was installing Windows 7 and it took a while to get everything installed and stuff.

Why do I do this to myself?

I've got my computer more or less functional on Ubuntu Linux. I can surf the web. I have a text editor that works, but is missing a couple features I really miss from Q10. I should at least be satisfied, if not happy.

I tried Windows 7 back in May and found it wouldn't run Q10 and, according to my journal, had a driver issue. I can't find anything to indicate the situation might have improved. Still, I'm downloading a torrent of Microsoft's ISO, I'll have it in 4 hours. Just went to Microsoft's site and found my product key, turns out you can only get new keys or look up old keys until tomorrow. The fact that I squeaked in under that deadline by chance makes me feel a bit better about things, feels like an omen.

My backup will be done in an hour. After that I guess I'll decide weather or not to fiddle with my OS again.

PS: Looks like Q10 had a new version in June, so maybe that will have fixed the Windows 7 issue?

Going to close Firefox to clear up some RAM until the backup is done. See you all in an hour ;)

PPS: Backup is done.
Another problem I have is that I just don't like Microsoft as a company. It makes me feel odd wanting to give another of their products a try.

Can't wait for the big check. If it comes I'm going to get a makbook of some sort and probably dualboot XP if I can't find a writer I like.

a ride? :p
Title got long in just the right spot, ne?

http://www.darkvoidgame.com/tesla/

Saw this on G4 tonight, game looks interesting, but the car looks like a lot more fun. Thought I'd share.

Funny thing is, I went to the car's site and it says you can finance up to 75% of the cost of the car, with payments as low as $1,700 a month! At that price I'll have to pick a couple up if I don't win :p

Zappos.com is awesome.

I found out last week that my feet have gone from a size 11 to a size 11.5. Means I went from a difficult-to-find size to a no-one-makes-that-size-try-12s size (which are a all-we-have-is-three-pairs-of-sandals-in-that-size size). I could have gotten a pair of mens boots, but then I would need a narrow width, and no one caries those either, so I finally tried Zappos.

Found theese cute boots and they sent them out on Saturday. Today I got the tracking number after the boots were already on my coffee table Turns out they gave me a free upgrade from the 3-4 day UPS Ground to UPS next day air. No additional cost. I'm just so happy to have my boots after having spent one Chicago winter without decent foot protection, I had to write this journal :p

Exhausted, really. Last night I had a fight with the barometer. I was hurting bad enough I was unable to sleep until around 9 this morning when the pressure began to level off.

I figured I could sleep until 3 or 4 this afternoon, but these effin' bill collectors decided different and called me at 1:30. That's really not enough sleep for me. The galling thing is, I was told yesterday that they wouldn't call again for 21 days since I'm working with the hospital to get the debt paid through charity. I was told the same thing when they called, interrupting my sleep, and I explained it to them every day this week and twice on Wednesday.

I've done all their paperwork and jumped through every hoop they've presented me twice already as I've tried to get this taken care of. I started the process for the third time again last week. It's almost been a year since the date I required their services, and the collections calls have only intensified over that period. Today I've decided enough is enough.

I contacted the representative at the hospital in charge of the process and registered my complaint. She agreed to try and send through a previous application, but informed me that the collections calls will continue until the debt is resolved. I gathered the information she was willing to share, and am now keeping a file on my phone calls with the hospital staff. I also informed her that, until I receive some proof that my application has been submitted and denied, I consider the matter closed and will not respond to any further calls from collections agents.

Cell phones are wonderful. I've saved the number the collections agency is calling from to my phone's address book. Using my phone's voice recorder I made a silent fifteen second recording and set that to the individual ringtone for that number. Now I will not be woken up again and if they call from another number I can simply add that number to their entry.

Anyone think of anything more I should have done?

Postscript:
Also, for anyone interested, it has now been a month since my disability hearing and I've heard no word.
No further motion on my law suit either.

Dear Tony,
I don't really know how to tell you this, but Our romance is over. I think I realized it That night you picked your nose In a clown suit and I saw you Sit on My salt-beef bucket. I'm sure you're Scared enough to understand That your driving sucks. I'm returning Your toe ring to you, but I'll keep Your car as a memory. You should also know that I Told in my confession today about the moose poaching and You should get that embarrassing rash checked out.
Go milk a cow
Shannon

~~~~~~~~~~

I stole this from Couldn't resist, it goes perfect on a rainy day after an hour or so of sleep. Form is below ;)


Dear (someone you spoke to recently),
I don't really know how to tell you this, but (1). I think I realized it (2) (3) and I saw you (4)(5). I'm sure you're (6) enough to understand (7). I'm returning (8) to you, but I'll keep (9) as a memory. You should also know that I (10) and (11).
(12)
(your name!)

1) What's the color of your shirt?
Blue - I'm in love with your cat
Red - Our affair is over
White - The rainbow hedgehogs want to destroy you
Black -Our romance is over
Green- Our socks don't match
Grey - You're a leprechaun
Yellow - I'm selling myself for candy
Pink - Your nostrils are insulting
Brown - The mafia wants you
No shirt - I'm joining the Convent
Other -I dislike your eyelashes

2) Which is your birth month?
January - That night you picked your nose
February -When I quoted Forrest Gump
March - When your dwarf bit me
April - When I tripped on peanut butter
May - When I threw up in your sock drawer
June - When you put cuffs on me
July – When I saw the purple monkey
August - When you smacked my ass
September - Last year when you peed your pants
October - When we skinny dipped in the bathtub
November - When your dog humped my leg
December - When I finally changed my underwear

3) Which food do you prefer?
Tacos - In your apartment
Chicken- In your car
Pasta - Outside of your office
Hamburgers - Under the bus
Salad – As you were eating Kraft Dinner
Lasagna - In your closet
Kebab - With Jean Chrétien
Seafood - In a clown suit
Sandwiches - At the Elton John concert
Pizza - At the mental hospital
Hot dog - Under a street light
Annat- With George Bush and Stephen Harper

4) What's the color of your socks?
Yellow - Ignore
Red - Put whipped cream on
Black - Hit on
Blue - Knock out
Purple - Pour syrup on
White - Carve your initials into
Grey - Pull the clothes off
Brown - bit of
Orange - Castrate
Pink - Pull the pants off of
Barefoot - Sit on
Other - Drive over

5) What's the color of your underwear?
Black - My boyfriend
White - Pull the clothes off
Grey – The Catholic Priest
Brown – The Montreal Canadiens' goalie
Purple - My corned beef hash
Red – My knee caps
Blue - My salt-beef bucket
Yellow - My illegitimate child in Ghana
Orange - My Blink 182 cd
Pink – Your "My Little Pony" collection
Other --The elephant in the corner

6) What do you prefer to watch on TV?
One Tree Hill - Senile
Heroes- Frostbitten
Lost - Sterile
Simpsons- Cowardly
The news - Scared
American Idol - Masochistic
Family Guy - Open
Top Model - Middle-class
Annat -shamed
House- High

7) Your mood right now?
Happy - How awful you are
Sad - How boring you are
Bored - That I get turned on only by garbage men
Angry - That your smell makes me vomit
Depressed – That we’re related
Excited - That I may pee my pants
Nervous - The middle-east is planning their revenge on you
Worried - That your Ford sucks
Apathetic - That you need a sex-change
Silly - That I'm allergic to your earlobes
Cuddly - That Santa doesn't exist
Ashamed - That there is no solution to you being a dumb kid
Other - That your driving sucks

8) What's the color of your walls in your bedroom?
White - Your toe ring
Yellow - Your love letters to me
Red - The pictures from Vegas
Black - Your pet rock
Blue - The couch cushions
Green - Your car
Orange - Your false teeth
Brown - Your nose hair clippers
Grey - Our matching snoopy underwear
Purple - Your old New Kids on the Block blanket
Pink - The cut toenails
Other - Your tongue ring

9) The first letter of your first name?
A/B - Your virginity
C/D - Your photo with the moustache drawn on it
E/F - Your neighbors dog
G/H - The oil tank from your car
I/J - Your left ear
K/L - The results of that blood-sample
M/N - Your glass eye
O/P - My common sense
Q/R - Your mom
S/T - Your car
U/V - Your criminal record
W/X – Your sucide note
Y/Z - Your credit cards

10) The last letter in your last name?
A/B - Get sick when I think of your feet
C/D - Always will remember the pep talks
E/F -Never will forget that night
G/H – Will not tell the authorites that you stole the whale from the backyard.
I/J – Mocked you behind your back constantly
K/L - Hate your cooking
M/N - Told in my confession today about the moose poaching
O/P - Told my psychiatrist about the bruises
Q/R - Always wanted to break your legs
S/T - Love your sweet, sweet ass
U/V - Will try to forget that you broke my heart
W/X - Haven’t showered in a month
Y/Z – am better off without you

11) What do you prefer to drink?
Wine- Our friendship is ruined
Soft drink – I love Oprah
Milk - The apartment building is on fire
Water – I'm scratching my butt as you read this
Cider– I have a passionate interest for mice
Juice – You ruined my attempts at another world war.
Snapple/ . . Vitamin water – You should get that embarrassing rash checked out
Hot chocolate – Your Cucumber- . . fetishism. . is weird
Whiskey - I’m off to lead a new life as a lemon
Beer – Thanks for the Cocaine
Other – you should stop picking your nose

12) To which country would you prefer to go on a vacation?
Thailand – Warm tingly sensations
France - Love always
Spain - With tears of sadness
China – You make me sick
Germany – Please don’t hurt me
Japan - Go milk a cow
Greece - Your everlasting enemy
USA - Best of luck on the sex change
Egypt – Kiss my butt
England - Go drown yourself
Italy - Please, don't lick my inner thighs anymore....