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GUIZ.
Posted 12 years agoGUIZ. GUIZ. GUIZ... ! I didn't even have to use my AK.
Stolen meme.
Posted 12 years agoI'm bored! Not really, but it's like I am.
Thank you Wolf man Blaidd for the kind donation.
1. Had sex? Yes
2. Bought Condoms? Yes, mostly go for the free ones though.
3. Gotten somebody Pregnant? No. A scary moment though. Just use a rubber, kids.
4. Failed A Class? Yes, only once: High School Physics, Senior year. I bailed on the first trimester after the Fail. ... Too much fucking my girlfriend.
5. Kissed A Boy? Yes.
6. Kissed A Girl? Yes, and I like it.
7. Used A Little Paper Bag for Lunch? If you don't you're paying too much.
8. Had A Job? Contrary to popular belief, yes.
9. Slipped On Ice? Yes, I still love busting my ass on the god-damned frozen ground.
10. Missed The School Bus? Yes. Mom never took me, I just had to make all the work up.
11. Fucked a girl? Noted above.
12. Bullied Someone On The Internet? Of course. People are sensitive, so everything is bound to be "bullying".
13. Sexted? Yes.
14. Sex In Public? Yes, but most are chickens for it.
15. Played On A Sports Team? Yes, Soccer (defense), Baseball (catcher and a little pitcher pre-highschool [THE IRONY])
16. Smoked Weed? Yes, I prefer eating it.
17. Smoked Cigarettes? Yes, worthless habit. Get high at least, for fuck's sake.
18. Smoked A Cigar? No, oddly enough. At least they smell nice.
19. Drank Alcohol? Maybe once. :V Certainly not right now. :V
20. Watched porn? Yes.
21. Skipped class? Yes.
22. Gotten Arrested? Detained, sir, never arrested. Plebs.
23. Done meth? Don't ever start what you can't finish. No.
24. Been To A Wedding? Yes, only just recently.
25. Fell in love with a best friend? If they are a best friend I love them, in that way.
26. Been On The Computer For 5 Hours Straight? With this crowd, few haven't.
27. Watched TV For 5 Hours Straight? Unfortunately, TV is ass. *watches five TNG in a row*
28. Been Late For Work? Was once tired of making excuses so told the truth. Turns out telling your boss you're late because you "were having gay sex" is frowned upon.
29. Been Late For School? Yes, once got a ticket for speeding to get there. Was given only a warning on the basis that my "Led Zeppelin was the loudest I've ever heard from a car."
30. Kissed In The Rain? Yes, Florida rain is warm.
31. Showered With Someone Else? Yes, and another, and another.
32. Failed My Drivers Test? No. I mean really, that is nearly retard proof.
33. Cheated on a ex? Yes, that person caught me, and we went on for some years with better arrangements/understandings.
34. Been Outside My Home Country? Mexico, Canada, Commonwealths.
35. Been On A Road Trip Longer Than 5 Hours? Unless I fly. I may travel often.
36. Had Lice? Three times. Once as an adult even... shits are prolific in the wrong hoods/times.
37. Gotten My Heart Broken? Yes. If you haven't then you've yet to live.
38. Had A Credit Card? Ha, an odd one to say no too... but no. I don't believe in debt in many degrees.
39. Been To A Professional Sports Game? Yes. The emotion of the thing is... incredible.
40. Broken A Bone? Just toes actually. I surprise even myself with that statement.
41. Am I BI/Gay/Lesbian? I'm whatever you want me to be, because I like sex.
42. Won A Trophy? None that I keep with me. High School Diploma kinda counts though. lol
43. Cut Myself Unintentionally? Yes. Never a good permanent chunk though.
44. Had An STD? Carrier of generic/common to open sexual peeps, HPV: warts, which isn't as bad as you may think. I haven't shown in some seven years, meaning spreading potential for the strain is lowest (my body carries but isn't active)... panic if you must, but don't fucking kid yourself, you probably already have had it (and your body "fixed") if you've boned unprotected, a few other scary times, real shit-myself moments... but still clean when it comes to all other STDs.
45. Got Engaged? Hopefully never.
46. Done ecstasy? Damn it, I haven't. It was right there, yet she didn't want to "waste it" in a not party situation. You ended up having a lesser time, too bad woman!
47. Tried Out To Be On A TV Show? Certainly not.
48. Rode In A Taxi? Yes.
49. Been To Prom? Yes. Not much time dancing though. Prom = Fucking.
50. Played A Drinking Game? I may have engaged in organized drinking. :V
51. Stayed Up For 24 Hours Or More? I don't ever recommend it, it is stupid and impairs whatever your goal is.
52. Been To A Concert? Many.
53. Had A Three-Some? Only a couple of bad ones, remarkably.
54. Had A Crush On Someone Of The Same Sex? All the time.
55. Been In A Car Accident? Yes.
56. Had Braces? Yes.
57. Learned Another Language? 'MURICA. *cough* :V
58. Killed An Animal? Put down a cat (was a Vet. Tech.[schooling and profession for a bit]), killed a bird(pellet gun, never again), many smaller things (it happens).
59. Been At A Yard Sale? Hosted even.
60. Been To A Japanese Steakhouse? Actually no. Huh.
61. Wore Make Up? I may have been a woman a few times. >.>
62. Talked To Someone Via Webcam? I remember one in particular that will stay with me forever. R.I.P. a Certain Jay.
63. Lost My Virginity Before I Was 16? May surprise a few, but I was a V until nearly my 19th.
64. Had My Wisdom Teeth Taken Out? Only the bottom two.
65. Kissed Someone A Different Race Than Myself? Of course. This sounds racist, IMO.
66. Snuck Out Of The House? Nope. By the time I felt the need I had moved out.
67. Bought Porn? Not once; pirate that shit! I don't beg, borrow, or deal with artists ideas either. If they have an idea, then they can draw it. I'll apreciate it.
68. Had A Virus On My Computer? Yes. DAT PORN.
69. Had Oral Sex? I do like the Giving end. My piece isn't that interesting.
70. Dyed My Hair? No, I like my grays.
71. Gone Skinny Dipping? Indeed I have. Especially here in Oregon. DEEZ HOT SPRINGS.
72. Graduated From College? ... ... Nope. :/
73. Wore Someone Else’s Clothes? Mostly women's! ZING. But that makes them mine. EXTRA ZING.
74. Voted In A Presidential Election? I don't vote in states that are hilariously one sided or don't matter.
75. Rode In An Ambulance? Yes.
76. Rode In A Helicopter? I wish.
77. Caught The Stove On Fire? If you haven't, then you don't cook.
78. Got In A Verbal Fight? Yes. So verbal it was mitts.
79. Met Someone Famous? The B-52's.
80. Been On Vacation? I always am.
82. Been On A Boat? Yes. Though I don't like the ocean.
81. Been On An Airplane? More than I like. I'm not a fan.
83. Broken Something Expensive? My MCL ... ... LOlollololol. But really, a few things.
84. Had Surgery? Above is related.
85. Beat A Video Game? Yes.
86. Found Something Valuable On The Ground? Yes.
87. Made A Survey? Made? No, I think my questions would be too invasive.
88. Stalked Someone On A Social Network? Creep.
89. Prank Called Someone? Yes.
90. Been To A Library Outside Of School? Honestly. The fuck. READ A BOOK FOR FUCK'S SAKE.
91. Spent Over $100 Shopping In One Day? Not even in a week.
92. Cut My Hair And Hated It? No, though I suspect that will happen when I cut my three year locks.
93. Peed Outside? A great many buildings have seen the wraith of my urea vengeance.
94. Went Fishing? Of course.
95. Helped With Charity? Actually... prolly never. I don't give, unless it is to the person needing.
96. Taken A Pregnancy Test? I DON'T HAVE A VAJAY-JAY.
97. Been Rejected By A Crush? Always at least one every 3-4 months.
98. Been Suspended From School? Yes, for all kinds of fights, talk, skipping, and once a video.
99. Broken a mirror? I'm sure I've gotten at least a few sevens of bad luck.
100. Thrown up on someone? Ha!, no. I like to control myself. I assume being a pre-memory toddler/baby doesn't count.
101. Lied to your parents? I try not to, because they deserve the truth... and I don't live with them. BUT THE FUCK. OF COURSE I HAVE.
Thank you Wolf man Blaidd for the kind donation.
1. Had sex? Yes
2. Bought Condoms? Yes, mostly go for the free ones though.
3. Gotten somebody Pregnant? No. A scary moment though. Just use a rubber, kids.
4. Failed A Class? Yes, only once: High School Physics, Senior year. I bailed on the first trimester after the Fail. ... Too much fucking my girlfriend.
5. Kissed A Boy? Yes.
6. Kissed A Girl? Yes, and I like it.
7. Used A Little Paper Bag for Lunch? If you don't you're paying too much.
8. Had A Job? Contrary to popular belief, yes.
9. Slipped On Ice? Yes, I still love busting my ass on the god-damned frozen ground.
10. Missed The School Bus? Yes. Mom never took me, I just had to make all the work up.
11. Fucked a girl? Noted above.
12. Bullied Someone On The Internet? Of course. People are sensitive, so everything is bound to be "bullying".
13. Sexted? Yes.
14. Sex In Public? Yes, but most are chickens for it.
15. Played On A Sports Team? Yes, Soccer (defense), Baseball (catcher and a little pitcher pre-highschool [THE IRONY])
16. Smoked Weed? Yes, I prefer eating it.
17. Smoked Cigarettes? Yes, worthless habit. Get high at least, for fuck's sake.
18. Smoked A Cigar? No, oddly enough. At least they smell nice.
19. Drank Alcohol? Maybe once. :V Certainly not right now. :V
20. Watched porn? Yes.
21. Skipped class? Yes.
22. Gotten Arrested? Detained, sir, never arrested. Plebs.
23. Done meth? Don't ever start what you can't finish. No.
24. Been To A Wedding? Yes, only just recently.
25. Fell in love with a best friend? If they are a best friend I love them, in that way.
26. Been On The Computer For 5 Hours Straight? With this crowd, few haven't.
27. Watched TV For 5 Hours Straight? Unfortunately, TV is ass. *watches five TNG in a row*
28. Been Late For Work? Was once tired of making excuses so told the truth. Turns out telling your boss you're late because you "were having gay sex" is frowned upon.
29. Been Late For School? Yes, once got a ticket for speeding to get there. Was given only a warning on the basis that my "Led Zeppelin was the loudest I've ever heard from a car."
30. Kissed In The Rain? Yes, Florida rain is warm.
31. Showered With Someone Else? Yes, and another, and another.
32. Failed My Drivers Test? No. I mean really, that is nearly retard proof.
33. Cheated on a ex? Yes, that person caught me, and we went on for some years with better arrangements/understandings.
34. Been Outside My Home Country? Mexico, Canada, Commonwealths.
35. Been On A Road Trip Longer Than 5 Hours? Unless I fly. I may travel often.
36. Had Lice? Three times. Once as an adult even... shits are prolific in the wrong hoods/times.
37. Gotten My Heart Broken? Yes. If you haven't then you've yet to live.
38. Had A Credit Card? Ha, an odd one to say no too... but no. I don't believe in debt in many degrees.
39. Been To A Professional Sports Game? Yes. The emotion of the thing is... incredible.
40. Broken A Bone? Just toes actually. I surprise even myself with that statement.
41. Am I BI/Gay/Lesbian? I'm whatever you want me to be, because I like sex.
42. Won A Trophy? None that I keep with me. High School Diploma kinda counts though. lol
43. Cut Myself Unintentionally? Yes. Never a good permanent chunk though.
44. Had An STD? Carrier of generic/common to open sexual peeps, HPV: warts, which isn't as bad as you may think. I haven't shown in some seven years, meaning spreading potential for the strain is lowest (my body carries but isn't active)... panic if you must, but don't fucking kid yourself, you probably already have had it (and your body "fixed") if you've boned unprotected, a few other scary times, real shit-myself moments... but still clean when it comes to all other STDs.
45. Got Engaged? Hopefully never.
46. Done ecstasy? Damn it, I haven't. It was right there, yet she didn't want to "waste it" in a not party situation. You ended up having a lesser time, too bad woman!
47. Tried Out To Be On A TV Show? Certainly not.
48. Rode In A Taxi? Yes.
49. Been To Prom? Yes. Not much time dancing though. Prom = Fucking.
50. Played A Drinking Game? I may have engaged in organized drinking. :V
51. Stayed Up For 24 Hours Or More? I don't ever recommend it, it is stupid and impairs whatever your goal is.
52. Been To A Concert? Many.
53. Had A Three-Some? Only a couple of bad ones, remarkably.
54. Had A Crush On Someone Of The Same Sex? All the time.
55. Been In A Car Accident? Yes.
56. Had Braces? Yes.
57. Learned Another Language? 'MURICA. *cough* :V
58. Killed An Animal? Put down a cat (was a Vet. Tech.[schooling and profession for a bit]), killed a bird(pellet gun, never again), many smaller things (it happens).
59. Been At A Yard Sale? Hosted even.
60. Been To A Japanese Steakhouse? Actually no. Huh.
61. Wore Make Up? I may have been a woman a few times. >.>
62. Talked To Someone Via Webcam? I remember one in particular that will stay with me forever. R.I.P. a Certain Jay.
63. Lost My Virginity Before I Was 16? May surprise a few, but I was a V until nearly my 19th.
64. Had My Wisdom Teeth Taken Out? Only the bottom two.
65. Kissed Someone A Different Race Than Myself? Of course. This sounds racist, IMO.
66. Snuck Out Of The House? Nope. By the time I felt the need I had moved out.
67. Bought Porn? Not once; pirate that shit! I don't beg, borrow, or deal with artists ideas either. If they have an idea, then they can draw it. I'll apreciate it.
68. Had A Virus On My Computer? Yes. DAT PORN.
69. Had Oral Sex? I do like the Giving end. My piece isn't that interesting.
70. Dyed My Hair? No, I like my grays.
71. Gone Skinny Dipping? Indeed I have. Especially here in Oregon. DEEZ HOT SPRINGS.
72. Graduated From College? ... ... Nope. :/
73. Wore Someone Else’s Clothes? Mostly women's! ZING. But that makes them mine. EXTRA ZING.
74. Voted In A Presidential Election? I don't vote in states that are hilariously one sided or don't matter.
75. Rode In An Ambulance? Yes.
76. Rode In A Helicopter? I wish.
77. Caught The Stove On Fire? If you haven't, then you don't cook.
78. Got In A Verbal Fight? Yes. So verbal it was mitts.
79. Met Someone Famous? The B-52's.
80. Been On Vacation? I always am.
82. Been On A Boat? Yes. Though I don't like the ocean.
81. Been On An Airplane? More than I like. I'm not a fan.
83. Broken Something Expensive? My MCL ... ... LOlollololol. But really, a few things.
84. Had Surgery? Above is related.
85. Beat A Video Game? Yes.
86. Found Something Valuable On The Ground? Yes.
87. Made A Survey? Made? No, I think my questions would be too invasive.
88. Stalked Someone On A Social Network? Creep.
89. Prank Called Someone? Yes.
90. Been To A Library Outside Of School? Honestly. The fuck. READ A BOOK FOR FUCK'S SAKE.
91. Spent Over $100 Shopping In One Day? Not even in a week.
92. Cut My Hair And Hated It? No, though I suspect that will happen when I cut my three year locks.
93. Peed Outside? A great many buildings have seen the wraith of my urea vengeance.
94. Went Fishing? Of course.
95. Helped With Charity? Actually... prolly never. I don't give, unless it is to the person needing.
96. Taken A Pregnancy Test? I DON'T HAVE A VAJAY-JAY.
97. Been Rejected By A Crush? Always at least one every 3-4 months.
98. Been Suspended From School? Yes, for all kinds of fights, talk, skipping, and once a video.
99. Broken a mirror? I'm sure I've gotten at least a few sevens of bad luck.
100. Thrown up on someone? Ha!, no. I like to control myself. I assume being a pre-memory toddler/baby doesn't count.
101. Lied to your parents? I try not to, because they deserve the truth... and I don't live with them. BUT THE FUCK. OF COURSE I HAVE.
Snagged snaggable item
Posted 13 years ago1) Where did you begin 2012?
Wondering why my place of work was closed, and blackened.
2) What was your status by Valentine’s Day?
I was in burds.
3) Were you in school anytime this year?
I once walked on the UofO campus to get to HIV testing.
4) How did you earn your money?
No earning, just some tax money, food stamps, and my unused college funds.
5) Did you have to go to the hospital?
Hospitals are for the sick or wealthy.
6) Did you have any encounters with the police?
Ya know? I don't think I did. Huh. A first in years.
7) Would you relive 2012 over and over again?
I'd take the bird and put him in a different year.
8) What did you purchase that was over $1000?
I didn't even make a purchase of over $50, if that.
9) Did you know anybody who got married?
Nope, two in 2013 though.
10) Did you know anybody who passed away?
No one immediate, but a wave was felt in my community.
11) Did you know anyone who had a baby?
They best not have kids, my friends.
12) Did you move anywhere?
Eugene.
13) What concerts/shows did you go to?
None this year, sadly. Also another first in some long years.
14) Are you registered to vote?
I voted Riley Clawson for President.
15) Do you still have the same job as You did in the last?
Nope.
16) Has anyone betrayed you in 2012?
Real betrayal? No. The ones who do betray never get that close.
17) Where do you live now?
With some damn fine human beings.
18) Describe your birthday?
Played the Dark Souls drinking game. A game of games.
19) What’s one thing you thought you’d never do but did in 2012?
Nothing in the "never" category really happened, not even close.
20) What has been your favorite moment?
Uh... something sexual, I suppose. That was special.
21) What’s something you learned about yourself?
I'll never be content without work, ever.
22) Any new additions to your family?
Plus one burd.
23) What was your best month?
Uh... nope, not one sticks out.
24) Were you in a relationship this year?
Yup.
25) What music will you remember 2012 by?
Nothing different, it's been a slow musical year.
26) Favorite book you read?
Also nothing new.
27) Favorite Movie?
I couldn't point to one.
28) Favorite TV show?
Pffft.
29) New friend?
A few, but not many. Met most in year past.
30) Would you say you’ve changed since the beginning of this year?
I got chubby.
31) Do you think 2013 will be better or worse?
It already has gotten better.
Wondering why my place of work was closed, and blackened.
2) What was your status by Valentine’s Day?
I was in burds.
3) Were you in school anytime this year?
I once walked on the UofO campus to get to HIV testing.
4) How did you earn your money?
No earning, just some tax money, food stamps, and my unused college funds.
5) Did you have to go to the hospital?
Hospitals are for the sick or wealthy.
6) Did you have any encounters with the police?
Ya know? I don't think I did. Huh. A first in years.
7) Would you relive 2012 over and over again?
I'd take the bird and put him in a different year.
8) What did you purchase that was over $1000?
I didn't even make a purchase of over $50, if that.
9) Did you know anybody who got married?
Nope, two in 2013 though.
10) Did you know anybody who passed away?
No one immediate, but a wave was felt in my community.
11) Did you know anyone who had a baby?
They best not have kids, my friends.
12) Did you move anywhere?
Eugene.
13) What concerts/shows did you go to?
None this year, sadly. Also another first in some long years.
14) Are you registered to vote?
I voted Riley Clawson for President.
15) Do you still have the same job as You did in the last?
Nope.
16) Has anyone betrayed you in 2012?
Real betrayal? No. The ones who do betray never get that close.
17) Where do you live now?
With some damn fine human beings.
18) Describe your birthday?
Played the Dark Souls drinking game. A game of games.
19) What’s one thing you thought you’d never do but did in 2012?
Nothing in the "never" category really happened, not even close.
20) What has been your favorite moment?
Uh... something sexual, I suppose. That was special.
21) What’s something you learned about yourself?
I'll never be content without work, ever.
22) Any new additions to your family?
Plus one burd.
23) What was your best month?
Uh... nope, not one sticks out.
24) Were you in a relationship this year?
Yup.
25) What music will you remember 2012 by?
Nothing different, it's been a slow musical year.
26) Favorite book you read?
Also nothing new.
27) Favorite Movie?
I couldn't point to one.
28) Favorite TV show?
Pffft.
29) New friend?
A few, but not many. Met most in year past.
30) Would you say you’ve changed since the beginning of this year?
I got chubby.
31) Do you think 2013 will be better or worse?
It already has gotten better.
I'm a Man. A Man: a man, man, man.
Posted 13 years agoI'd rather be woman. Big news there: not.
SO. I'm leaving for some weeks. Additionally I don't check this often. .... ;therefore, I apologize (sort of) for late and or non-existent comments.
True Facts: See you in a few days FL.
Also True Facts: See you in a few weeks OR.
Also Also True Facts: Watch my twitter feed for me being afraid of nothing... but FLYING.
I HATE FLYING.
SO. I'm leaving for some weeks. Additionally I don't check this often. .... ;therefore, I apologize (sort of) for late and or non-existent comments.
True Facts: See you in a few days FL.
Also True Facts: See you in a few weeks OR.
Also Also True Facts: Watch my twitter feed for me being afraid of nothing... but FLYING.
I HATE FLYING.
CAMP FIRE-EFFING-TAILS
Posted 13 years agoITWASSOCOOLANDTHEREWEREALLKINDSOFCRAZYTHINGSANDCRAZYPEOPLEANDIWASLIKESWEEEEETANDDRANKALOTANDTHEYWERELIKESWEEEEETANDALSODRANKALOTANDITWASFUNANDTHENTHEREWERENAKEDPEOPLEATTHEWATERFALLANDWECALLEDITTINYDICKFALLSBECAUSEITWASEFFINGCOLDANDMADEYOURDICKSMALLEVENIFITWASNT THEEND.
But really, great time with the gang, as always. Pretty much nothing but good times for me, I just wondered off if there was any question that something may be 'unfun'. A new friend kept me pretty safe all weekend, and my six bottles of wine was a win from setup day. Got to know some people that I hadn't really known before, asserted that they are good folks.
To summarize: FUCK TRAVIS
But really, great time with the gang, as always. Pretty much nothing but good times for me, I just wondered off if there was any question that something may be 'unfun'. A new friend kept me pretty safe all weekend, and my six bottles of wine was a win from setup day. Got to know some people that I hadn't really known before, asserted that they are good folks.
To summarize: FUCK TRAVIS
Free stuff for YOU.
Posted 13 years agohttp://www.furaffinity.net/journal/3447908/
Go there, maybe get art.
Go there, maybe get art.
2011 An Obligitory Review
Posted 14 years agoIt goes something like this:
If you weren't there, you missed it.
The end.
If you weren't there, you missed it.
The end.
Titties: the story on why I don't have any.
Posted 14 years agoSo. Been doing this Portland thing for about four months now. Decent metro area here. Granted I'm in the 'burbs, and that sucks. I'm hoping to fox my way into the place proper next year. Until then I'm stuck with typical 'burb problems: long commute, not enough friend near by, white people, stale downtowns, limited public transport, and lack of gay bars. Hell, I could at least walk to downtown Eugene and get ogled by some older men at SNAFU. Good stuff being that I have made plenty of associates, finally got a job I don't mind and pays the bills, and have lots of options. So all in all, I'm just waiting for my situation to devlop into something more interesting. I will examine my housing options by December, apply for school, consider a vehicle, and establish myself at a gay bar. Time heals all wounds, especially those involving a lease. :D
Internet Hiatus
Posted 14 years agoNot in any sort of bad "I'm fed up with you people" sort of way. Just moving to Portland from the Eugene for my new gig. It's a good job, so I'm leaving; therefore, leaving my computer access as well. I've got a phone, with nifty gadgets like Gmail and twitter. So those who can contact me through those, its all good! So peace out FA.
Anticipation
Posted 14 years agoWaiting for my wine to take hold so I can play some Portal2 as per my pledge to play through buzzed or better. Haven't seen any of it yet, so I'm kinda FUCKING PUMPED. So while I wait, let's type some nonsense... Why not. A short story perhaps? I think I may.
Kaskade’s voice hums in and out for a moment. White fades to black, black brightens to white. The bass remains firm as a fur comes to. “Feeling the past moving in, letting a new day begin…” Choosing this song seemed like a good idea at the time. “I Remember, I Remember…” Now it just seemed needlessly cruel. I concentrate on the bass, the vocals, those highs and lows edging me back to present and real. Water? Water. I feel water. “Hold to the time that you know, you don’t have to move on to let go…” I’m in my bath. What the hell did I do last night? ‘You do not want to know’, I remind myself. Indeed not, if I decided to bathe immediately after my nightly procedure. I linger in the bath a moment, feeling an intense hangover. The vomit inducing, world spinning, head crushing kind.
This has to stop.
Only a month or so more, and then I’m done.
I need the money.
I want it to stop.
I wish I could, but I do need the money. Only a little bit more until I can leave this. To think it could be so much worse. To think I could actually remember it all. I shudder at the thought, then the luke warm water. Getting out of the tub, I dry myself off, and don my bathrobe. My clothes are in the washer, wet but clean. My ‘tools’ are laid out on the living room floor, ready for my inspection. My scheduler’s alarm goes off. “Prep for a six o’clock at 342 Square Ct., downtown; bring usual + heels, he likes paws” the screen informs me. It’s already five. Squatting down over my things I find some needing refills, others cleaning, and my most cherished piece is still humming with life. I hook that one up to my computing wall, and let the data upload. Pulling it over to my auction area, I put it up for a decent price considering I don’t know what’s on it. I’m sure that piece won’t last for more than an hour, as usual. That was where the real pay was in this line of work.
In memories.
I might get a few hundred for letting some scum fuck my brains out, but some other scum will scoop up my one-off play-by-play memory for thousands. It’s still fairly new, this tech. I had to save up for months to get one of the first extractors. These little machines take memories from the owner and write them into digital forms of data. It sounds like a sweet deal and all, but it comes with its own prices. The eggheads have all but agreed that the prolonged use of the device will raise the chances of the owner never remembering parts of their lives. Fine right? It would be better if the margin of error didn’t include other memories too. Fine by me, I say. I don’t want to know what they do to me. I got over that thrill long before the device was brought to market. Now I just have my wake-up song play to bring me back from my induced sleep, and prep for whatever appointment (or lack thereof) I should happen to have that night. All the things in between: the sex, the violence, the drinking, the schmoozing, the fights... gone. I just get a fat bank account to pay off my debts. To get out of this life, and into my own.
…
Kaskade’s voice chants at me again. Black stays black for a time.
I’m not sure how long.
I’m sore.
Really sore. Sore in places I didn’t know I had.
I think the song has looped.
Oh. The lights aren’t on… and it’s night. That explains that.
At least I’m in my bed this time.
I feel liquid at my eye. I’m not crying, what the hell is it? I reach for it, feel it… its… viscous. I don’t know. Wandering towards the bathroom I feel my clothes underpaw. I didn’t wash them?
So sore. I hurt.
I flip on the bathroom light to survey myself… blood. I’ve gotten a nasty forehead cut, and a neck line bruise. Someone probably choked me.
Anger.
This has to stop.
Only a month or so more, and then I’m done.
I take a quick shower and gather my clothes without looking at them for stains and holes. I know they are. It hasn’t been this bad in some time. I remember the last time, that’s how long. I go over my tools again, just as every post wake-up. Several pills are missing from my kit. That explains the lack of pain for what must’ve been a good beating. I can’t wait till they wear off. I hook up the device, pull the… it isn’t there. My memory is missing. Was it that bad? What did I do to it?
Panic.
I need the money.
My scheduler informs me that I have no appointments today.
I dress for the warmth of a summer’s eve. Coming down from the twenty-fourth floor a spotted dog of some sort enters the elevator. “You warm in that get-up?” He quips. “Yeah, it’s warm enough.” I give back. I’m not really in the mood for conversation right now. I do notice his odd looks, and wandering gaze though. I’m sure it’s not the first time he’d seen a fine example of a fur in a tight pair of jeans and a low collared top. Probably just the head wound giving a wonderful impression. I get out at the ground floor and make for the front exit. I get to the doorman before I notice it’s snowing.
Snow.
It was summer and 85 degrees outside yesterday.
No… not yesterday. How long?
The doorman tips his red hat and gives me a curious look before asking if I’d like his jacket. “No, thanks, I was just checking to see if a friend arrived yet.” I mutter as I walk back to the elevators. I enter and plug the twentieth floor’s button with a shaking digit.
I want this to stop.
I get inside my pent-house just to collapse to my knees. The scheduler says it’s November. Definitely not the summer I was expecting. What did I do to my months? Why can’t I remember? I go to the computing wall to get my bearings. What have I missed? ‘Our war over-seas had ended.’ Well that’s nice. ‘Memory extraction found to be too dangerous, taken off market.’ No shit. ‘Preventive care for rheumatism perfected.’ Good at least I won’t have bum knees. ‘New elected officials.’ Had I voted for them, I wonder. What of my bank account?
Hm.
I don’t need the money.
I’ve stopped.
That took longer than expected. Also much better than expected for a short P.O.S. Should be a "submission" really. Hm. It could be so much better too. Could take it and make it much longer, or at least a twice as much to better grasp the unfaced character and what he/she/it is doing. Though maybe that's part of the fun of it. Reminds me of some stuff I read in those sci-fi shorts. Man those guys really influence my thoughts! I'll save it amongst my other incomplete works for some completion, some other time, on some other plane of existence when/where I feel like it. OH WELL, I feel good to go now. Nice and warm. Mission Accomplished! To the Portal!
Kaskade’s voice hums in and out for a moment. White fades to black, black brightens to white. The bass remains firm as a fur comes to. “Feeling the past moving in, letting a new day begin…” Choosing this song seemed like a good idea at the time. “I Remember, I Remember…” Now it just seemed needlessly cruel. I concentrate on the bass, the vocals, those highs and lows edging me back to present and real. Water? Water. I feel water. “Hold to the time that you know, you don’t have to move on to let go…” I’m in my bath. What the hell did I do last night? ‘You do not want to know’, I remind myself. Indeed not, if I decided to bathe immediately after my nightly procedure. I linger in the bath a moment, feeling an intense hangover. The vomit inducing, world spinning, head crushing kind.
This has to stop.
Only a month or so more, and then I’m done.
I need the money.
I want it to stop.
I wish I could, but I do need the money. Only a little bit more until I can leave this. To think it could be so much worse. To think I could actually remember it all. I shudder at the thought, then the luke warm water. Getting out of the tub, I dry myself off, and don my bathrobe. My clothes are in the washer, wet but clean. My ‘tools’ are laid out on the living room floor, ready for my inspection. My scheduler’s alarm goes off. “Prep for a six o’clock at 342 Square Ct., downtown; bring usual + heels, he likes paws” the screen informs me. It’s already five. Squatting down over my things I find some needing refills, others cleaning, and my most cherished piece is still humming with life. I hook that one up to my computing wall, and let the data upload. Pulling it over to my auction area, I put it up for a decent price considering I don’t know what’s on it. I’m sure that piece won’t last for more than an hour, as usual. That was where the real pay was in this line of work.
In memories.
I might get a few hundred for letting some scum fuck my brains out, but some other scum will scoop up my one-off play-by-play memory for thousands. It’s still fairly new, this tech. I had to save up for months to get one of the first extractors. These little machines take memories from the owner and write them into digital forms of data. It sounds like a sweet deal and all, but it comes with its own prices. The eggheads have all but agreed that the prolonged use of the device will raise the chances of the owner never remembering parts of their lives. Fine right? It would be better if the margin of error didn’t include other memories too. Fine by me, I say. I don’t want to know what they do to me. I got over that thrill long before the device was brought to market. Now I just have my wake-up song play to bring me back from my induced sleep, and prep for whatever appointment (or lack thereof) I should happen to have that night. All the things in between: the sex, the violence, the drinking, the schmoozing, the fights... gone. I just get a fat bank account to pay off my debts. To get out of this life, and into my own.
…
Kaskade’s voice chants at me again. Black stays black for a time.
I’m not sure how long.
I’m sore.
Really sore. Sore in places I didn’t know I had.
I think the song has looped.
Oh. The lights aren’t on… and it’s night. That explains that.
At least I’m in my bed this time.
I feel liquid at my eye. I’m not crying, what the hell is it? I reach for it, feel it… its… viscous. I don’t know. Wandering towards the bathroom I feel my clothes underpaw. I didn’t wash them?
So sore. I hurt.
I flip on the bathroom light to survey myself… blood. I’ve gotten a nasty forehead cut, and a neck line bruise. Someone probably choked me.
Anger.
This has to stop.
Only a month or so more, and then I’m done.
I take a quick shower and gather my clothes without looking at them for stains and holes. I know they are. It hasn’t been this bad in some time. I remember the last time, that’s how long. I go over my tools again, just as every post wake-up. Several pills are missing from my kit. That explains the lack of pain for what must’ve been a good beating. I can’t wait till they wear off. I hook up the device, pull the… it isn’t there. My memory is missing. Was it that bad? What did I do to it?
Panic.
I need the money.
My scheduler informs me that I have no appointments today.
I dress for the warmth of a summer’s eve. Coming down from the twenty-fourth floor a spotted dog of some sort enters the elevator. “You warm in that get-up?” He quips. “Yeah, it’s warm enough.” I give back. I’m not really in the mood for conversation right now. I do notice his odd looks, and wandering gaze though. I’m sure it’s not the first time he’d seen a fine example of a fur in a tight pair of jeans and a low collared top. Probably just the head wound giving a wonderful impression. I get out at the ground floor and make for the front exit. I get to the doorman before I notice it’s snowing.
Snow.
It was summer and 85 degrees outside yesterday.
No… not yesterday. How long?
The doorman tips his red hat and gives me a curious look before asking if I’d like his jacket. “No, thanks, I was just checking to see if a friend arrived yet.” I mutter as I walk back to the elevators. I enter and plug the twentieth floor’s button with a shaking digit.
I want this to stop.
I get inside my pent-house just to collapse to my knees. The scheduler says it’s November. Definitely not the summer I was expecting. What did I do to my months? Why can’t I remember? I go to the computing wall to get my bearings. What have I missed? ‘Our war over-seas had ended.’ Well that’s nice. ‘Memory extraction found to be too dangerous, taken off market.’ No shit. ‘Preventive care for rheumatism perfected.’ Good at least I won’t have bum knees. ‘New elected officials.’ Had I voted for them, I wonder. What of my bank account?
Hm.
I don’t need the money.
I’ve stopped.
That took longer than expected. Also much better than expected for a short P.O.S. Should be a "submission" really. Hm. It could be so much better too. Could take it and make it much longer, or at least a twice as much to better grasp the unfaced character and what he/she/it is doing. Though maybe that's part of the fun of it. Reminds me of some stuff I read in those sci-fi shorts. Man those guys really influence my thoughts! I'll save it amongst my other incomplete works for some completion, some other time, on some other plane of existence when/where I feel like it. OH WELL, I feel good to go now. Nice and warm. Mission Accomplished! To the Portal!
PENIS
Posted 14 years agoJust spent a good bit of time brushing up on my cat penis knowledge even though I'm not in Vet.Tech. classes anymore, or for some time. Fucking love furries and our outlandish arguments. The world is a better place if you can blather on about cat dick.
A little bored, but not by much.
Posted 14 years ago1.- Name: You're looking at this? Than you know.
2.- Gender: Somewhere in between
3.- Preference: Men, but I don't mind the ladies!
4.- Species: Red Fosh
5.- Closest object at your right side: ... the mouse? Left: Roomie's phone
6.- What you are listening to: Dem Carbos (kyandi remix) - Annodam
7.- Favorite color: Deep red
5.- Favorite dessert: Strawberry - Rhubarb Pie
6.- Favorite fruit: Prickly Pears? Fruit is the bomb.
7.- Favorite food: Flautas paws down
8.- Passions: Music, music, music, drinking, drinking, drinking
9.- What you are wearing: undershirt, and comfy pants
10.- Age: I feel thirty lately, but twenty-three.
11.- What you did in the last hour: I woke up.
12.- Current time of day: 1:21 PM PST
13.- Last city you were in: Aside from Eugene/Springfield, Ashland.
14.- City you want to be in: Here is good for the moment.
15.- Reason: It's not Florida, and I just got here.
16.- Last exam you had: Shiiiiit. Last thing that amounted to an exam was some bartend grilling me on my drink recipes.
17.- Last movie you saw: The Winter War (Finnish war movie)
18.- You have friends?: Only good ones.
19.- How many?: That's debatable.
20.- Last time you've been at the hospital: For me? When I was in a car for an accident (8yrs old). Other "incidents" weren't actually a hospital.
21.- Last class you had: LIFE. I got Schooled.
22.- Have been kissed: yep
23.- When you last were kissed: With love? Almost a year ago. With lust? Last night.
24.- Last time you took a plane: June '11, hate that shit.
25.- Where you went during last vacation: I came here, best vacation EVER.
26.- Favorite fast food: Single hamburgers and fries from any burger joint.
27.- Favorite museum?: hm. The Dali Museum in St. Pete, FL
28.- Favorite rock band: Led Zeppelin
29.- Favorite TV series: I.T. Crowd? maybe.
30.- The current time: YA AXED DIS.
31.- Socks or bare feet: Socks, with grip and designs :D
32.- Do you sleep naked: I'm an underwear sort.
33.- How many pillows you use: One, sometimes none.
34.- Beach or Mountains: Mountains any day, rain or shine.
35.- Sports: GOOOOOOLLLLLLLL!!!!!!!
36.- Videogame console(s): Xbox 360, PS3, PC
37.- Favorite OS: Its all the same shit as long as I can download some stuff.
38.- Favorite Music player: Mine, but it's only 4gb... but its mine.
39.- Favorite liquor: DRAMBUIE!
40.- Last time you got a kiss: YA DUN AXED IT SON!
41.- From who: Love - Christopher, of course. Lust - You could guess.
42.- Do you drive: Only once since I got here, quite nice.
43.- Vehicle: None for now, but my tax return spell MOTORCYCLE, or shitty old car.
44.- Do you read comics: Web stuff.
45.- Like reading?: Love that shit.
46.- Last book you read?: Myths of Creation by some noob, it sucked.
47.- Magazine subscription: none. I do like Time (news for ADD folks)
48.- Calling or texting: Texting, although tremendously impersonal, does the job.
49.- Favorite ice cream flavor: Mint Chocolate Chip with Marshmallow on top.
50.- Do you live a routine: Love routine, but force myself to change every now and again.
51.- Do you like camping: Its a damn fine time.
52.- Watching TV: newp.
53.- Where you are: Representing the Eugene.
54.- A random quote: "Work is the curse of the drinking class." - O. Wilde
55.- Still a virgin: HA.
56.- When you lost it: I was eighteen, to my first girlfriend. lol, girls.
57.- Was it special: It was awesome, but she had to go home without cuddles, lest she be grounded from me.
58.- Ever made love: Many times, its nice, but in lust is a handy thing to have.
59.- With who: A handful of people. Love is an amorphous thing.
60.- Last time you had sex: Last night, but before that about a week.
61.- Last time you felt asleep watching a movie: Maybe a week ago?
62.- Are you a gentleman/lady?: Neither. I like to be rude.
63.- Ever kissed somebody of your same sex: yep
64.- Did you like it: If I'm kissing you, I like it.
65.- Naughtiest thing you've ever done: Depends on your thoughts on naughty.
66.- Favorite drink: RED RED WINE
67.- What's your heritage: Quarter Native Mexican, the rest being random Euro: Mostly English, some German, Polish. Plus the random fornications with Afro-Americans and Native Americans
68.- Who will answer this: Answer what?
69.- Favorite brand of beer: GUINESS! Brilliant!
70.- Ever been heartbroken: Still am a bit.
71.- By who: Anyone who needed to know the story, does. And some who don't.
72.- Ever showered with somebody: Just a few times... *stiffle*
73.- Favorite soda: Ginger-Ale
74.- Underwear: Womens size five...
75.- Favorite animal: Dogs
76.- Ever kissed a friend: Often. I show much affections to those I consider friends.
77.- Fears: Planes, heights, the dark sometimes, spiders if they're near me.
78.- The car of your dreams: Anything small and awesome. MG Midget, another Geo (convertible), etc.
79.- Favorite food: LIKE ITS CHANGED.
80.- Favorite iron chef: Alton Brown IS THE IRON CHEF.
81.- Song you're listening to right now: (This is) The Dream of Evan and Chan
82.- Do you dance: It takes a special moment, or money for a strip contest.
83.- Do you sing: I can match tone, but really who cares? The pitch is off.
84.- Favorite girl name?: shit iduhnno
85.- Favorite boy name?: see above
86.- What time is it?: NO
87.- You enjoyed this meme: It filled my time = success.
88.- Tell something to us: BESA MIS NACHAS!
89.- Is this Meme too long: It is certainly a possibility.
2.- Gender: Somewhere in between
3.- Preference: Men, but I don't mind the ladies!
4.- Species: Red Fosh
5.- Closest object at your right side: ... the mouse? Left: Roomie's phone
6.- What you are listening to: Dem Carbos (kyandi remix) - Annodam
7.- Favorite color: Deep red
5.- Favorite dessert: Strawberry - Rhubarb Pie
6.- Favorite fruit: Prickly Pears? Fruit is the bomb.
7.- Favorite food: Flautas paws down
8.- Passions: Music, music, music, drinking, drinking, drinking
9.- What you are wearing: undershirt, and comfy pants
10.- Age: I feel thirty lately, but twenty-three.
11.- What you did in the last hour: I woke up.
12.- Current time of day: 1:21 PM PST
13.- Last city you were in: Aside from Eugene/Springfield, Ashland.
14.- City you want to be in: Here is good for the moment.
15.- Reason: It's not Florida, and I just got here.
16.- Last exam you had: Shiiiiit. Last thing that amounted to an exam was some bartend grilling me on my drink recipes.
17.- Last movie you saw: The Winter War (Finnish war movie)
18.- You have friends?: Only good ones.
19.- How many?: That's debatable.
20.- Last time you've been at the hospital: For me? When I was in a car for an accident (8yrs old). Other "incidents" weren't actually a hospital.
21.- Last class you had: LIFE. I got Schooled.
22.- Have been kissed: yep
23.- When you last were kissed: With love? Almost a year ago. With lust? Last night.
24.- Last time you took a plane: June '11, hate that shit.
25.- Where you went during last vacation: I came here, best vacation EVER.
26.- Favorite fast food: Single hamburgers and fries from any burger joint.
27.- Favorite museum?: hm. The Dali Museum in St. Pete, FL
28.- Favorite rock band: Led Zeppelin
29.- Favorite TV series: I.T. Crowd? maybe.
30.- The current time: YA AXED DIS.
31.- Socks or bare feet: Socks, with grip and designs :D
32.- Do you sleep naked: I'm an underwear sort.
33.- How many pillows you use: One, sometimes none.
34.- Beach or Mountains: Mountains any day, rain or shine.
35.- Sports: GOOOOOOLLLLLLLL!!!!!!!
36.- Videogame console(s): Xbox 360, PS3, PC
37.- Favorite OS: Its all the same shit as long as I can download some stuff.
38.- Favorite Music player: Mine, but it's only 4gb... but its mine.
39.- Favorite liquor: DRAMBUIE!
40.- Last time you got a kiss: YA DUN AXED IT SON!
41.- From who: Love - Christopher, of course. Lust - You could guess.
42.- Do you drive: Only once since I got here, quite nice.
43.- Vehicle: None for now, but my tax return spell MOTORCYCLE, or shitty old car.
44.- Do you read comics: Web stuff.
45.- Like reading?: Love that shit.
46.- Last book you read?: Myths of Creation by some noob, it sucked.
47.- Magazine subscription: none. I do like Time (news for ADD folks)
48.- Calling or texting: Texting, although tremendously impersonal, does the job.
49.- Favorite ice cream flavor: Mint Chocolate Chip with Marshmallow on top.
50.- Do you live a routine: Love routine, but force myself to change every now and again.
51.- Do you like camping: Its a damn fine time.
52.- Watching TV: newp.
53.- Where you are: Representing the Eugene.
54.- A random quote: "Work is the curse of the drinking class." - O. Wilde
55.- Still a virgin: HA.
56.- When you lost it: I was eighteen, to my first girlfriend. lol, girls.
57.- Was it special: It was awesome, but she had to go home without cuddles, lest she be grounded from me.
58.- Ever made love: Many times, its nice, but in lust is a handy thing to have.
59.- With who: A handful of people. Love is an amorphous thing.
60.- Last time you had sex: Last night, but before that about a week.
61.- Last time you felt asleep watching a movie: Maybe a week ago?
62.- Are you a gentleman/lady?: Neither. I like to be rude.
63.- Ever kissed somebody of your same sex: yep
64.- Did you like it: If I'm kissing you, I like it.
65.- Naughtiest thing you've ever done: Depends on your thoughts on naughty.
66.- Favorite drink: RED RED WINE
67.- What's your heritage: Quarter Native Mexican, the rest being random Euro: Mostly English, some German, Polish. Plus the random fornications with Afro-Americans and Native Americans
68.- Who will answer this: Answer what?
69.- Favorite brand of beer: GUINESS! Brilliant!
70.- Ever been heartbroken: Still am a bit.
71.- By who: Anyone who needed to know the story, does. And some who don't.
72.- Ever showered with somebody: Just a few times... *stiffle*
73.- Favorite soda: Ginger-Ale
74.- Underwear: Womens size five...
75.- Favorite animal: Dogs
76.- Ever kissed a friend: Often. I show much affections to those I consider friends.
77.- Fears: Planes, heights, the dark sometimes, spiders if they're near me.
78.- The car of your dreams: Anything small and awesome. MG Midget, another Geo (convertible), etc.
79.- Favorite food: LIKE ITS CHANGED.
80.- Favorite iron chef: Alton Brown IS THE IRON CHEF.
81.- Song you're listening to right now: (This is) The Dream of Evan and Chan
82.- Do you dance: It takes a special moment, or money for a strip contest.
83.- Do you sing: I can match tone, but really who cares? The pitch is off.
84.- Favorite girl name?: shit iduhnno
85.- Favorite boy name?: see above
86.- What time is it?: NO
87.- You enjoyed this meme: It filled my time = success.
88.- Tell something to us: BESA MIS NACHAS!
89.- Is this Meme too long: It is certainly a possibility.
LoL Icon
Posted 15 years agoSo, as it would turn out making .gif files isn't that hard. I'm fucking proud of myself for my work, damn it. It's awesome. I wasn't asking you. >.> <.<
FC 2011
Posted 15 years agoSO. I went to the bay area. The gay Mecca of the U.S.. ... and went to a furry convention. DAMN IT. I'm happy, I'm sad. "What have you done with your life, James?" I ask myself. It was for a good cause though; I went to see a dear friend in a Fed. Pen.. We visited said friend for an unprecedented three days due to the glory of Martin Luther King Jr. and his federal holiday. It was nice, surreal at times, but nice. Nice to see she was doing well. Nice to see her after far too long, even if the location wasn't prime. As for the Con... whatev. I didn't think it'd be for me: the masses of fursuits, odd folks, and noise. Sure enough it wasn't. I tried to work off my fees to swap for living space and food, but was roadblocked on most occasions. The ineptitude of the GoFurs (volunteers) Staff was appalling. First and Second Leads were not the leadership type. Severely lacking in organizational skills and motivation. The majority of the actual volunteers were grunts without a brain between them, which is fine. It's only a problem when Staff assigns them to preform tasks that require a brain. A third Lead came to the rescue, "Stormy". She's nice. More over, she made an impromptu schedule and filed the GoFurs into line. Unfortunately she has a job and life outside of the Con... so she couldn't stop the leaks all the time. Bottom line was between not being around for Art Room deconstruction and a want not to be involved with the major Leads... I didn't get enough hours. I pretty much gave up when the Staff Feed was so fucked up I couldn't feed myself when I got hungry. Luckily I have a few damn good friends around to pick me up, and put me up. It's nice. One of the first times I can say I didn't have to come to someone's aid, but instead they came to mine. Friends with their own resources and sometimes a little extra space. I admit I didn't ask, I seem almost incapable of asking for real help. Then again I didn't have to. That's just the sort of friends these are. I hope that I can make some extras so I can bring all of them to their tables soon. Because they need some pay back for their pay outs. Will I go to FurCon again? I don't quite know. I'd like to make enough to get a room for me and two to three others. Even if that means paying for the bulk of said room. I like my space, and to know the people in it. I have a dream of getting a room on the party floor and making the most of it. Obviously they go fast... like I said, a dream. I'd like to make a party in that room, with a billowing piece of cloth outside and above the door. Orange cloth with a white tip: fox tail, of course. I'll call it "The Fox Hole" Party. I'll have to perfect/invent various furry related drinks and supply the booze. Expensive? Yes. Daring? Yes. Just stupid and out of reach enough for me to want to do it and succeed? You bet.
First time for everything.
Posted 15 years agoSo first post here on this little blog sort of journal thing. Not sure what to type about really. I've got nothing tremendously entertaining to put here. It's hard to find things interesting to others when you've been striving to be with yourself for the past six months. Which is odd: this staying with myself for these months. It's comforting; like I've accomplished something that hasn't made me insane. Unfortunately it is time to bring forth cash. To get a job, to pay the bills, to buy the booze, to get up at socially appropriate times. Quite a shock to me that I've stayed unemployed and relatively chaste in these months. Differs from the hustle and bustle of the past years. The struggle to live and maintain independence turned into the daily grind of seeing what isn't there, typing obscenities into the early morning hours, and not bothering to shave or dress. I've decided its not really for me. The goal of not having goals has been achieved, and gotten me no-where. Just as I wanted, but... once again, not for me. Not to say I'll like people or my furry brethren more now, or be drunk less. That's just stupid. I think I'll try the job and hermitage life now. I think I'm under the Idea that I have debts to pay, hence the change. Debts, as I see them, infringe on my independence. Which of course is my point in life since I've seen so many fail at it. That's not a jab at anyone/thing, just a realization that to be with people, someone sometimes has to be there for them, as in not always a cohesive unit. It furthers my lack of confidence in the human race. And as much as I'm sure I could just live with a pack of dogs in the forest for the rest of my days, a handfull of people make me want to stay. I like supporting others in one manner or another, to be that person required to make others come together. My favorite has been to support their alternate state. There was a time when it was girls playing legos, various generally non-intermingling social cliches playing LAN Halo, but now its the drink. Which is odd, as the fur I live with is without the urge to release via the drink. "What an odd roomie pair", I've always thought. It's true: we're fucking weird, the two of us. Confused more than once for relatives too, with our South American military caps and my occasional face hair. He's like a nicer version of me. Dating/Marrying a girl, tucks his shirt in, doesn't alter his state with things, and gentle to a fault. Although he has been either late, or called into work more often while I've been here than I had in my nearly five years of employ elsewhere. Which is a note worth a chuckle to me, but I can't. Why? Because I have to go pee, and if I made my diaphragm move too much... well. Yeah. BRB. ... Well. I'm back now. Not that you would've known if I hadn't told you. I think I'll leave you with that there. My pee break. CLEARLY, its a grand note to leave you on. Peace out, various slices of the holmes.
